An American friend, let’s call him Phil, has discovered the bounties of East European girls. After a lifetime of drama dating compatriots of every known taxonomy, he recently hooked up with a cute Polish chick and, in his words, “there’s no going back”. We had an IM exchange where he explained his revelation:
Phil: she gave me a BJ in the park
Phil: behind a tree
Me: how long have you been going out?
Phil: a few weeks
Phil: she is completely sexually uninhibited
Phil: have you ever had a girl lick your asshole?
Me: she’s already doing that for you?
Phil: well, not quite. i didn’t want her to. so she licked the taint.
Phil: that’s not the half of it
Me: your game must be exceptional
Phil: actually, i used very little game on her
Phil: she said she was going for a walk and i said ”why don’t you join me for a walk near my place”.
Me: and two weeks later her tongue was on your taint
Phil: as if it was the natural progression of things
Me: no shit tests?
Phil: not a one. her sincerity actually confused me at first.
Me: how old is she?
Phil: 23 [editor's note: considerably younger than my friend]
Phil: i told her i was going to tell my friends about her, the sex stuff and everything
Phil: and she said “it’s OK to share our joy with your friends”
Phil: she treats me like a king
Phil: she loves sex
Phil: you should see her smile when she sees me.
Me: is she shorn?
Phil: yep, and she offered to shave mine
Me: i hear wedding bells
Phil: i can’t believe what i’ve been missing all these years
Phil: no more yentas for me
And so another red-blooded American male urbanite has succumbed to the sweet nectar of foreigner love, forever turned off to the idea of dating the homegrown talent. Phil said that if, in the future, he found himself in the company of an American girl his expectations for her would be much higher. Thanks to the eye-opening experience with this girl, there are certain behaviors and outlooks on life he just won’t abide anymore.
I asked him, as good as things were with his Polish girl, if he thought there was a catch. His answer? “When is there not a catch? At least with her, getting caught doesn’t feel like a power struggle.”
Phil is now a big proponent of importing into the US millions of young women from former Communist countries.