Zeets sent me this photo, with the following message:
“First I saw the two barking rats, then I saw the guy walking them. Talk about an odd pairing! The dude had tattoos on his skull, and looked tough. Not like the herb or homo I thought he would be. And there he is, with two runty toy dogs. One of the dogs walked like it had a cucumber up its ass.”
This is an excellent example of someone defying expectations. Does anyone doubt this dude gets laid like gangbusters? I bet his idea of a brothel is the local dog park. And he pays in cloyingly cute toy poodle dollars.
I’ve written before about how important contrast is to your game. Contrast, like its social dynamics cousins vulnerability game and being unpredictable, is a status signal of alphaness. When women see a man defy convention, or wantonly fuck around with societal expectation, they think “Oh, he must be an alpha, because only an alpha could risk stepping out of line like that.” Or when they hear a man reveal a potentially status damaging vulnerability at odds with his image of strength, they think “He must be really alpha to confess his fear of parrots.”
No, seriously, that’s the way women think. Subconsciously, at least.
Contrast game is also a variety of handicap game, a powerful technique for subcommunicating genetic superiority. Like bright, heavy plumage on a peacock, tattoos signal that a man is so genetically fit (and symmetrical) that he can afford the risk to his health and looks that getting inked with needles will mean for him. Skull tattoo dude in the above photo actually has a double handicap whammy advertising his alpha genetic fitness — he’s enduring both the disfigurement of tattoos *and* the public humiliation of walking two gay ass pooches. (I bet he’s telling the other dude to be careful where he steps.)
How powerful a psychological mindfuck is contrast? Two words:
That ugly broad got on stage and, in the teeth of a hostile, pitying audience, sang the shit out of “I Dreamed A Dream”. Result? Standing ovation, tears flowing like a river, and eight million copies of her debut album sold in the first six weeks. For a more recent example of the contrast phenomenon, check out this video of Janey Cutler, the 80 year old singer who elicits the same reaction from an audience expecting something entirely different. Or this blind lady I saw in a restaurant, who played the piano and sang with a beautiful voice I wasn’t expecting from someone who resembled a flesh golem.
That, my friends, is the awesome power of contrast. Now imagine what it can do for your notch count.
So, you ask, how do I translate this theme of contrast into practical game advice? I can offer a few suggestions.
- If you’re meeting a girl for a dinner after work, and you’re in a business suit, take her to your favorite dive bar or hipster joint after the dinner. She’ll be pleasantly surprised that a professional such as yourself feels just at home in a dump as in a fancy restaurant. (Note: You really shouldn’t be taking girls you haven’t fucked to fancy restaurants.)
- Does she think your political views are antiquated? Good. Now take her out to a progressive-oriented art show filled with pseudointellectual revolutionary crackpots. She’ll start to wonder what else about you she doesn’t know.
- Speak streetwise, but occasionally drop a big word in your conversation. Intellectual dominance is to smart chicks like physical dominance is to prole chicks.
- If you’re a very masculine man, peacock with a feminine accessory, like an ornate bracelet or an earring. If you’re naturally foppish, try wearing masculine accessories, like a big honking watch or combat boots.
- Approach a girl like a typical beta, asking her innocuous questions about how she likes living in the city. Once you have lulled her into an anhedonic stupor, hit her with a neg. Consider her look of surprise a step closer to intimacy.
- Did you meet a girl online and tell her about your starched shirt job? Then show up to the date wearing something boldly stylish. Her mind will race with thoughts of a secret life you’re hiding from her.
- Similarly, if you’re a suit-wearing type of guy, a well-placed tattoo on the inner forearm can do wonders to stir excitement. Just manufacture an excuse to roll up your sleeves, and watch her eyes light up.
- Regale her with adventure stories that are completely at odds with her image of you. For instance, if you’re an accountant, mention the time you spent in the Congo with the little-known aid group Accountants Without Borders, and how you budgeted the goats for the local village.
- Talk about how you voted for George Bush, then give a buck to a homeless bum you happen to pass by while walking with her. (Alternatively, you could reverse this sequence if you want to crush the girl’s hopes. After sucking up to her no-doubt SWPLian worldview, offhandedly announce after sex how you recently joined the NRA “to get some shootin’ practice for the big game animals you like to hunt”.)
Contrast is the reason why ugly guys can sometimes do better with women than handsome guys. A handsome man is expected to have his act together in all other ways; in comparison, nothing much is expected of ugly men. So an ugly man who spits tight game will pleasantly surprise a woman while a good looking man with game will simply confirm what she already believed to be true. And when it comes to making an impression on women, which man do you think she’ll remember more? That’s right, the man who surprised her out of her lazy thinking.
All humans want to be fascinated. Kurt Cobain had it right — here we are now, entertain us. Men are entertained by tits, ass and face. Women are entertained by male charisma and psychosocial savviness. They want to be kept on their toes, forever wondering what kind of man you are. Defying a woman’s expectations is the equivalent of a big-boobed woman taking off her sweater and shoving her cleavage in a man’s face. Her fond memory of you will linger well into the next day.