A reader emails:
Recently I have been gaming a girl who may intrigue some of the readers on this blog, along with yourself. An extremely high-T girl.
I met this girl in question at a party, where she came off as slightly shy and normal. I followed all of your pickup cues (luckily no shit tests, she came off as laid back), and I managed to get her number.
Here’s some background info on the girl. She’s a rower, 5’10” (I’m 6’2” so no worries there), a slight hipster, and very independent. Definitely high testosterone though.
Over the next few weeks, I built up some rapport by texting her and meeting up with her after work. Our time together is severely limited due to our schedules, so the texting part was needed.
The problem in this situation is the fact that she seems to be gaming me (waiting 20-30 minutes to text me back, being aloof, negging me, ignoring my negs/slight compliments, and just generally being strangely alpha for a girl) and it’s really bothering me. She seems to also be seemingly naive to most of my game, and reluctant to do anything.
She’s told me in the past she really enjoys being around me and she’s never felt the same way about a guy, but I am beginning to doubt it. I’ve tried not texting her yet she always texts me a day later with a typical alpha-type text.
She also recently went bitch-mode on me after I (reluctantly) asked the big question, saying that we aren’t together because I’m going back to school (about 200 miles away) and that she still wants to hang out.
I’d appreciate a response to this perplexing situation, and was wondering if there is anything I can do to remedy this. If there is nothing besides to break it off, I wouldn’t be devastated, but still upset, because this girl is a solid 9.
First, your email was unclear about your relationship with this high T girl. Have you been banging her? Or has it been texts and platonic hanging out since you met her? I’ll assume the latter, because it sounds like you are still trying to game her into sex, and that it hasn’t been that long since you got her digits.
Girls with male game — that is, girls who tease, neg (more likely insult, since girls don’t comprehend the subtlety of the neg), act cocksure, wait to reply to texts, show up late, and generally behave like a male player keeping a tasty morsel just out of their quarry’s reach — are usually the sluttiest hos or the most wicked ingenues you will come across. Male game is similar in some respects to The Rules, so this post is an indictment of that female mentality as well.
It may have been said somewhere on this blog already (and I suspect it has), but girls who play a man’s pickup game are drama queens who substitute the thrill of psychological manipulation for the emptiness of their gutted hearts. With each additional cock she rides, a bit of a girl’s soul is carved out and filled with a craving for external validation, which can only be satisfied by encouraging men to chase her. The magic of falling for a man and joyously relinquishing her body to the passions of sex are diminished with each new phallus, until one day her loins overdose and nothing short of a massive injection of head games will suffice to pleasure her.
If you insist on pursuing these types of women, here are some tips:
1. Don’t let her take control of the conversation. Be proactive. Never get caught in the endless spin cycle where you are reacting to all her shit tests. Ignore her taunts and change the subject often. This type of woman needs you to lead her away from her shitty attitude. She loves nothing more than to entrap you in an endless volley of flirty, but sexually fruitless, back and forth.
2. Don’t be shy about using severe negs on her. She can take it.
3. Don’t let her get a head of steam. Interrupt her when she’s about to go off on her own private Shedaho. Imply that her banter is dull and can only be rescued by switching to what you wish to talk about.
4. Use backturns liberally. She’s going to lash out when she sees you not falling for her tricks. Don’t fold like a cheap lawn chair. Hold your frame. When she gets especially unpleasant, make it known that you could do without her company. Then watch her soften.
5. If she punches, you roundhouse kick. For example, if she replies to your text one day later, you reply to her text one week later.
6. Do not react to either her negs or her compliments. Yes, it’s true, the compliment is a more effective snare than the insult in a woman’s arsenal. Reason being that many men with game who can swat away female insults tend to fall hard for sweetly delivered compliments. If you show the slightest hint that her compliment is meaningful to you, she knows she has you back in her sticky web.
7. Don’t jump to respond every time she contacts you. When she sends that text out of the blue, ignore it. You want her to dance to your tune, not the other way around.
8. If she goes bitch mode on you, walk away. She is impervious to reason or game at that point, and all she will understand is total rejection.
9. When you set up a date, TELL her where and when you will meet. Don’t make suggestions. If she balks, cut her loose. Don’t even reply to her if her answer is anything less than enthusiastic commitment to the date.
10. Occasionally be sincere. Sometimes you can stun a gaming girl into receptive submission by simply asking, in your calmest voice, “Why are you this way?” Be prepared for indignation. Stay strong, and give her the cold shoulder if she fumes too much.
11. Jump out ahead of her. Cancel the first date. (But give a quasi-plausible reason for doing so; just suspicious enough that it caffeinates her hamster.)
The most effective counterattack to the girl with male game is the winning combination of jealousy and scarcity. Don’t make yourself available to her, and do make it seem like she is just another chick in a long line of chicks who service you.
Remember that a girl who is running hardcore male game on you likely acts this way to most men, so don’t take it personally. She is hard to please, but her superficially tough shell is brittle once you know how to play her. She sees herself in the role of Joan of Snark, an entitled advocate of pussycentric physics, and she harbors a secret loathing for male desire, and wishes to trivialize it, or trifle with it. You want to focus on raising your value, and tactically lowering her value, so that she begins to think she would be missing out on something if she continues down the path of irksome aloofness.
Girls who think they can snag alpha males by using the kind of game that guys run are in for a rude awakening. Men with options will find these kinds of girls very annoying and use them as pump and dumps, and save their love for girls who know how to run real girl game.