I need to think on that one.

You’re talking down there. I’m talking up here. We have little to say to each other. Get it?

I have no disdain for pick up. On the other hand, I don’t think street magic is all that impressive or worth devoting one’s energy to mastering, particularly because there isn’t much to master. In fact I am happy there is a YaReally around to repeatedly beat fellows like you over the head with the experiential insight some of us encountered in high school and college, till you get it. There’s a lot of catching up for you to do. The more you regard your remedial learning as access to secret, world-stopping “wisdom,” the better.

Matt

= = “equals”

This is a mediafire link to what I was talking about:

http://www.mediafire.com/view/?ahi6fzd8bipg0ob

It’s just a Word file but I embedded Decibels PDF in there as it is difficult to find. Double click the PDF icon on the front page and you got it.

I compiled yours, Ripps, Shockers and maybe a couple other comments regarding texting. All legit stuff.

http://www.my-secret-life.com/contents.php

The way in which the protagonist single mindedly goes after his one goal, and the women’s reactions is…interesting.

Probably legit and not a flake/shit-test, because she was flirty as fuck at that point and she made sure to let you know that she IS still interested. Again notice that she won’t say “I’m busy, but let’s hang out next Thursday at 8pm”, all she can say is “I’m busy, but we should definitely hang out”…That’s that same “I won’t take the reins, I need you to figure out that you’re supposed to take the reins to make this happen” thing I was talking about before.

“I was planning on inviting her out again coming up but didn’t want to do it too much as Decibel says it’s a DLV if you keep on doing it.”

This comes down to value. If you’re high value, you can break rules without DLV’ing. Imagine if she had to flake on Brad Pitt and he called the next day to try to set something else up. Or even called every day for a week straight. She wouldn’t be like “eff that Brad, you’re a loser” because he has such high value to her. But, if a guy she’s on the fence about or isn’t really into does the same thing, it’s an express train into DLV land for him.

Think of it like this: Imagine Megan Fox (or whoever your celeb crush is) is txting you daily to hang out. You’re not going to be like “ugh she’s so annoying and needy and desperate, quit txting me Megan Fox!” because she has such high value to you. But then imagine a plain Jane average girl you feel “meh…” about who if she made it easy and you were in a dry spell you’d bang but you really don’t care about going out of your way to get her…imagine she does the same thing as Megan Fox did, txting you daily to hang out. You’re going to be like “fuck, this girl is annoying and needy.” and ditch her.

So you want to figure out what your value is to her. I’d say you probably could’ve pushed for a meet-up again because she seemed to be into you enough that you were closer to Brad Pitt than an annoying random. But I mean, that doesn’t help anything now haha just something to keep in mind for the future.

Note that this is your value TO HER (ie – her perception of your value), not your inherent value. If you’re a badass mofo but you had an off day and the impression you left on her was just fucking awful, you should know “okay I have some work to do on this, shit”. Or if you’re a lame-ass but for whatever reason like, a lion attacked and slipped and knocked itself out on your fist and all the girls around you get lady-boners for your awesomeness, know that to them you’re super high value…but then if a new girl walks into the room and didn’t witness the event and hasn’t talked to any of them yet, to HER you’re not as high value as you are to the other girls.

Don’t STRESS the value thing, like “ohhh nooo, I’m not high value enough, wahhh I’m not going to even try!!” Just be AWARE of it and tweak your game based on it.

This is also why basing your self-esteem on how girls react when you approach is a bad habit to develop…if you’re an awesome guy but you just don’t know how to present that well yet because you’re a newbie to game, well, you’re still that awesome guy, it’s just that TO HER, you haven’t presented that well, so your value ends up being low and she rejects you. Whereas if you were still the EXACT same guy, BUT you presented yourself better with solid game, she’d be all over you. So her reaction should really be irrellevant except as an indicator of whether you need to tighten your game up or look at sticking points you have.

“I also avoided texting her too frequently because yup I didn’t want to become a texting buddy.”

I think there’s a misconception in the community about “alpha txting”. I txt a LOT, like, all day long, daily, and I send paragraph long txts, multiple txts in a row, etc.

It’s not so much the frequency of your txting or the length of your txts that puts you in the “texting buddy” zone, it’s whether those txts are flirting or talking about puppy dogs and ice cream, and whether those txts are pushing toward a goal (aka a meet-up, aka fucking) or if they’re just wishy-washy floating in the breeze conversation.

Think of it more like: Am I expressing my intent? If you’re not, that’s how you get friend zoned. Expressing your intent makes it so she CAN’T categorize you as just a harmless friend. It’s that old PUA saying of “she should always feel that when she’s interacting with you she’s in imminent danger of being fucked” lol

So if she txts “how was your day?” and you wait 24hrs and txt back “not bad. u?”, that’s going to fuck you over compared to instantly replying “boring as fuck, but my night is going to be better ’cause I’m picking you up at 7 for dinner. Wear that red dress you wore when we met, that was killer.” Again even if she rejects the offer, you’ve shown that you’re not a friend zone guy, you’re not her texting buddy, you’re a guy that if she continues to interact with you, you will fuck her (so technically her still interacting with you after rejecting you IS the IOI that she still wants you to fuck her lol, but that’s another concept entirely).

“Oh, what made it more complicated was that she lives out in an area affected by Sandy”

Hard to account for a natural disaster like that lol I mean for all you knew her parents died in Sandy or something. Or maybe she was bored as fuck all day dying for someone to txt her so she had something to take her mind off it. It’s not really something you can be like “shit, the solid play would’ve been to do such and such” so I wouldn’t beat yourself up about it. Your plan was as good an attempt as any would have been in that situ!

“Once I realized that it’s practice and I’m bound to fuck up it makes the letdowns easier because time and time again I forget about whatever girl after I go out more and meet/game new ones.”

It’s like jogging. The more you do it, the further along you get each time before you burn out. Over time you effortlessly handle the runs that gave you trouble, but you’ll still burn out, it’s just further down the road. Don’t attach too much to it. Remember, you can’t control how people will react to you or how girls will respond to you…all you can control is whether you took “Right Action” or not.

“I wasn’t used to the fact that a girl that cute could possibly be into me so I didn’t physically escalate and it almost got to the point of “Surprise! I have a penis” game.”

lol don’t stress it, we were ALL there at one point. And even guys good at game fuck that up. Brad gives a couple little funny stories about Entitlement and assuming value here:

“See man, the field does fix you, like you said. Had I not made those mistakes the first time and learned (and got burned) from it, I would have made them again.”

lol ya, that’s a big part of why we stress going out. It’s like, I can TELL you “dude, do such and such” and you can KNOW logically “I should do such and such” but you’ll go out in the field and in the situ where you should do “such and such” you’ll blank or just not think of it or forget about it and get COMPLETELY FUCKED OVER and lose some hot chick and end up going home to spank it solo before you cry yourself to sleep. But the NEXT time you’re in that situ, your brain will go “HEY, remember what happened last time? Don’t let that shit happen again, fucker!!” and you’ll remember to do “such and such”:

“just frustrating that I still didn’t get further because I lacked leadership in the last text messages.”

Definitely sucks. But the next girl you txt? You’re gonna’ lead like a motherfucker.

“Finally, thanks again. I’ll be sure to keep you updated if she gets back to me”

No prob, hope she does. Lookin’ forward to the PDF, I’d never heard of Decibel’s txt stuff but I Googled it and gave it a quick glance and it looks solid. Going to give it a full read later.