Archive for the ‘Funny/Lolblogs’ Category

The Anti-Gnostic comments a lot over at Cheap Chalupas headquarters, and he (best guess) is usually good for a pithy shiv.

How the market prices white neighbors is one of those economic phenomena that economists’ wives understand better than they do.

There are a lot of things non-economists understand better than economists, not because economists are dumb, but because economists are superfluously smart and cursed with an addiction to hyper-rationalize their faulty feelgood priors.

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An attractive woman emptied her brain bowels online and pinched off a tapered string of sentences so vapid that you would be challenged to find a more inane splatter of poopytalk. From her article at a site called The Daily Love, titled “You do not have to prove yourself to anyone“, in which she tries to prove her point of view to anyone reading, the following nugget is excavated:

As a soul sister to many, I often find myself being called upon for a variety of supporting reasons. Today, I got a phone call from a fellow goddess and she was in absolute disarray. She was, well, a hot mess.

Separately, each of those sentences is empty überfeels nonsense. Together, they create a kind of super storm of silly doublethink (why would a goddess be in disarray?), solipsistic posturing, and infantile prattle.

This is your modern American woman with a cable modem. The internet, among its pantheon of induced pathologies, has had as well the salutary (sadistic?) effect of exposing dim-witted women, and particularly the attractive ones, to criticism and mockery of their forehead furrowing thoughts that they normally would not experience in the real world where people are politer and men more indulgent of non-obese fuckables.

This doesn’t seem to thwart the flow of distaff nonsense, though. Instead of retreating to lick their wounds and go back to doing what they do best — defer to the man of the house — they circle the wagons and soundproof their echo chambers. But the walls come tumbling down eventually. Some of the shivs must penetrate; expect an epidemic of mental illness among our wired women in the coming years.

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Comments are disabled on all posts published during Approach Week to encourage readers to limit their internet time and go outside to apply the lessons they have learned here. Approach Week celebrates the spirit of the approach, which is, in essence, a celebration of the spirit of assertive masculinity.

Continuing with CH’s Goodbye America in a Photo series, here’s the latest entry from “Sharpshooter“.

class. it doesn’t come in a can.

He explains,

Gotta classic photo for your Goodbye America campaign (attached).  I figured a newly minted bride chugging a four loko [ed: Four Loko is a prole alcoholic energy drink that a few states tried to ban for reasons of health safety] whilst being cheered on by the surrounding groomsmen (a couple she’s more than likely fellated) and bridesmaids is a microcosm of what this campaign is all about.

It’s tragically funny how the culture has changed so much that people automatically suspect one or more groomsmen at a wedding have had, at one time or anther, a piece of the bride’s downy. Our expectations for female behavior have shifted to a lower valence. Yes, the message this photo delivers is “A wedding is just another excuse to get drunk enough to forget that you’re marrying a beta buxtoy and will probably cheat in five years time.”

Personally, this isn’t half as bad as some of the Goodbye America photo submissions I’ve seen so far. But I post it because it speaks to a general corrosion of class among both sexes, but a corrosion which is especially pronounced among women. Class, in all classes, seems to be on the way out, if it hasn’t already made its final exit.

It makes sense if you realize that Western societies are moving away from K-selection (delayed reproduction, emphasis on monogamy and relationship investment, division of sexual labor) and toward r-selection (early sexual maturation, emphasis on polyamory and relationship instability, convergence of sexual labor). Raw sexual display by women — and this is what we mean by “low class” — will increase in a society gradually becoming more r-selection oriented.

It’s all part and parcel of cultural exhaustion and decline, exemplified by the twisted, ugly, and classless imposing their values on the normal, beautiful, and noble.

PS Happy Independence from Accountability Day!

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Submitted by a reader who shall remain anonymous pending clarification, here is the second in CH’s series of Goodbye America photos that record for future archeologists the degradation that was happening in America just before the lights went out on her brilliant but evanescent moment in history.


Her fav coal burning train, wink wink.

A police source told Action News there were “at least 10″ sexual encounters between Amato and the victim.

“He’s not doing too well, he doesn’t want to go to school. He feels humiliated, since that happened he changed,” said the child’s father.

Sources say even though Amato knew she had to turn herself in to police Wednesday, she posted pictures on Facebook of herself hanging out with her students on Tuesday night.

The upstanding young student is “not doing too well”. I bet. After he’s done high-fiving the males of his troop, he’ll need therapy and a warm hug from nice white ladies with savior complexes.

The other photo accompanying the story is almost as good.


Pile driving Miss Daisy, wink wink.

As a rascal noted, was it worth the 19 Likes?

If you wonder about the shape of the toilet that swallows once-great empires whole, there it is: A dumbfuck white woman chaperoning dumberfuck finger wagging gang bangers to a quiet spot in the ghetto where they takes turns scouring the life force out of her vagina and soul. And then posting the whole shebanged to Facebook. To polite applause.

I won’t argue against the notion that she has an as-yet unclassified mental disease (Stockton, CA Syndrome? Associative Hypergamy?), but have you noticed how frequently these slutty white teacher-vibrant student ruttings are occurring lately? It’s like the wheels are falling off American women. Wake up, beta white man, indeed.

Update: Another recent news story about a female teacher boffing one of her charges. She’s easy on the eyes, but watch out for her feral rationalization hamster.

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Reader IHTG forwarded this funny gif of a dude teasing a girl right up to the line of sexual harassment, holding his frame, and then defusing the tension with yet more teasing. Any formal context is missing (which is obviously true for short gifs), but you can figure it out by everyone’s facial expression.

This is a nice little demonstration of the cocky/funny alpha male attitude.

The (one-sided) courtship opens with the male’s exaggerated pose of neediness requesting acknowledgement from the female.

The female responds with a “who, me?” gesture, as most women would to a man brazenly beckoning for them. The rarity of such a thing among the males of the genus westernius Manboobii is what provokes the submissive female auto-response.

The courtship enters the “shock and awe” stage, when the alpha male “air swats” the female’s buttocks.

Now that the pair are fully engaged with one another, the female expresses anger and indignation toward the alpha male for his surprise advance on her posterior. In lioness terms, she evades the male lion’s mounting and wheels around to make a threat display. But we all know how this ends.

The alpha male does not appease the female nor attempt a reconciliation. Instead, he grins sociably, points at the female as if to declare her facial expression the height of comedy, and faces the crowd of onlookers to enlist their support and preempt any move by the female to ostracize him.

Turning back to the female (her hands perched on her hips waiting for his apologia), he extends a handshake of friendship to defuse the escalating sexual tension, only to once again befuddle and arouse the female by pulling his hand away from her just at the moment she prepares to accept his peace offering.

Finally, the courtship reaches the apogee of its first phase, when the alpha male’s cocky antics elicit a smile and a flurry of lighthearted punches from the female, who has been awakened to a state of sexual receptivity and has begun the second phase of the courtship where she “presents” to the alpha male for a continuation of their mating ritual.

In related news, Elliot Rodger never faked out a girl with a phony handshake.


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“Gym muscles. All bark, no wood. Get back to me when you’re clearing boulders and hoisting A-frames and your Amish wife is shitting your tenth child into one hand while scrubbing your tighty-whiteys on a washboard with the other.”

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This post is the start of a series featuring photos from readers that best distill the essence of a nation in decline. Our virgin Goodbye America photo entry is from reader Kyo,

OT for the “Goodbye America” crowd: the nation encapsulated in the background of one photo. Michelle Obama is giving a speech full of the usual retread anti-racist pablum at a high school.

On the right is a woman who looks to be in a state of delirious ecstasy to be where she is.

On the left is an unhappy man clapping because he’s read his Solzhenitsyn and knows what happens when people don’t clap when the regime wants them to.

Welcome to the dawn of the age of race cuckoldry!

Obviously, we can’t know for certain from looking at a photo what’s going through a person’s head, but if facial expressions could talk… abject prostration, from both the man and woman, comes to mind.

It’s amazing how quickly a nation can fall from world-bestriding power and faith in itself to a caricature of cultural collapse and masochistic submission. In a single lifetime, America will have gone from a roomful of 26 year old wunderkinds launching man into space and onto the moon, to a nation of whiny infants crying about privilege and microaggressions and wondering how to make a living with their liberal arts degrees.

Readers are welcome to submit their own Goodbye America photos. At the end of the year, winners will be announced. Do you have the photo that “sez it all” about post-America? Submit it to CH and make sure you watch this space from poolside!


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Amish Facebook

Commenter “The Burninator” muses about what an Amish Facebook page would look like.

I can’t imagine an Amish girl’s FB page.


“Today I churned butter with mama.”

Like 1

Amish father:

“Get back to work, girl!”

Like 124


You have to hand it to the Amish. They have the preternatural ability to avoid corruption by the pozzed American dysculture while living in the belly of the beast. Part of the reason is the “boiling off” selection effect that results from their rite of passage known as Rumspringa, which assures that the Amish left in the community evolve the personality traits to successfully deter outside influence.

Another reason has to be hard work. Toiling in the fields or the farmhouse tires a body and mind so thoroughly that social media distractions become less tempting. The Amish are preoccupied with survival and community. The non-Amish are preoccupied with white privilege and gay weddings.

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the cat gives me tingles.

She sounds relieved that there’s finally an alpha male in her marriage to whom she can submit. The job was apparently open…

Woman up front, man in back, just the way she likes it.

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Study of the Year material here. You’ll laugh, you’ll nod knowingly, you’ll thank god you weren’t born in Kenya.

The prevalence of extra-marital partnerships among women was 6.2% within a reference time of six months. Factors that were independently associated with increased likelihood of extra-marital partnerships were domestic violence (aOR, 1.45; 95% CI 1.09–1.92), women reporting being denied a preferred sex position (aOR, 3.34; 95% CI 1.26–8.84) and spouse longer erect penis (aOR, 1.34; 95% CI 1.00–1.78). Conversely, women’s age – more than 24years (aOR, 0.33; 95% CI 0.14–0.78) and women’s increased sexual satisfaction (aOR, 0.92; 95% CI 0.87–0.96) were associated with reduced likelihood of extra-marital partnerships.

Domestic violence, denial of a preferred sex positions, longer erect penis, younger age and increased sexual satisfaction were the main predictors of women’s involvement in extra-marital partnerships. Integration of sex education, counselling and life skills training in couple HIV prevention programs might help in risk reduction.

The first positive predictor of cheating whoredom — domestic violence — is likely mixing up cause and effect. Husbands who think they’ve been cuckolded by slutty wives are more likely to lash out violently to keep them in line. The rest are both predictable and hilarious. Women not getting off with their husbands cheat more. No surprise. Younger women with more sexual market options cheat more. Again, no surprise to any guest of Le Chateau.

The longer penis association with wifely infidelity is way out of left field. Apparently, penile enlargement remedies are a big thing (heh) in Kenya. But their women canna only take so much, captain!

“…some penis may be large yet my vagina is small, when he tries to insert it inside, it hurts so much that I will have to look for another man who has a smaller one [penis] and can do it in a way I can enjoy”

Are monster dicks more of a visual turn-on for women than a tactile turn-on? (Personal CH experience wielding the boomstick says both.) Or are black women as tight as Chinese finger trap?

The study also points up the importance of keeping your wife sexually satisfied if you don’t want her dreaming of trysts in the tall brown bush (heh!).

“Some [men] just take a minute and leaves you there when you are still ‘hanging’… You cannot even tell if this thing is over or still continuing. Sometime we arent satisfied yet we cant explain it [to our partners]. However, when we get men who can satisfy us, we do not waste such chances. For a woman to be ready and get sexual satisfaction usually takes time. Yet he has some high sexual desire and can just finish very fast before you understand how. We are left wondering and can be very happy if we can get someone who can do it better and makes you feel that your body is satisfied. I can just continue with him because his sex is sweet and your husband can then do it on short time basis”

So much for the myth of black male sexual prowess. To be fair, Kenyans are only one type of black. Maybe West Africans can go all night. Gotta love that wife’s rationalization for her cheating: “My lover has a slow hand, which gives me many orgasms so that I’m spent and don’t feel like demanding too much from my two-pumps-and-done husband.”

AIDS is rife in Kenya. Not coincidentally, 6.2% of Kenyan wives cheated within the study’s time span of six months. That’s actually a formidable number when you consider that Kenyan men are world-class cheaters. Add up all the dalliances and condom refusals and it’s no wonder Africa is getting the HIV shiv.

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