The SurpriseCBM

If girls are checking you out in public with love in their eyes and mist ‘twixt their thighs, it could be simply the case that you’ve got a ten foot hard-on walking ahead of you.

This happens when you’re daydreaming about last night. If you have an active, imaginative mind capable of weaving exquisite detail into a memory, you’ll often access those neural pleasure vaults that store steamy scenes of lovemaking, ancient and recent, while engaged in blissfully pedestrian activities, such as walking outdoors to get from place A to place B. Dulled by pre-collapse hedonistic pampering, you zone out to the thump of your playlist and recall in vivid hues that would be the envy of a weinstein bros production the girl you lacquered 18 hours ago. Your mind’s hand caresses her mesmerizingly rolling skinscape, exploring every hideaway, parting slick chrysalises, kissing lip and trough and mound, a stray nipple catching on your chest and springing away to resume its erect posture….

…and then you’ve got a boney. A big one. You look down and smile, because you’re not a soyboy ashamed of your surprise swole pole. Instead of concealing your insolence behind a stack of Atlantics, you milk your gristly thistle for all it’s worth, thrusting your crotch as far forward as it can go before you tip over backwards. Maybe you put your hands on hips to draw inattentive doe eyes to where they should be focused. A fat feminist shambles by, and practically salivates before remembering to be offended. You guffaw in her maw.

Personal space? That’s pleb talk. You have summoned a mighty pipe from your manly dendrites, and a gift as that should not go unnoticed.

God Game

If you really want to mindfuck an urbanness girlie and instill the Good Lord’s dread, after banging her out Saturday night, wake up early Sunday, get dressed, and tell her you’re going to Church. She won’t be able to stop texting you for the rest of the day.

If your local church is a cucky cheese, make a detour for the nearest pool hall.

Bonus God Game routine: After dressing in your Sunday best, kneel at the foot of your bed while she’s still in it half-asleep, wondering if you’re for real, and pray, “Dear Lord, wash the taint of carnal sin from me, and spare this woman your divine retribution. Show mercy on your wayward flock. Amen….Oh darlin’ there’s leftover pot roast in the fridge if you get hungry later.”

Why does this work?

Chicks dig the jerk with a heart of gold. (Bust expectations to crest poon vibrations.)

The bigger reason is that sheilas get all confuse’d-like and tingly when their man ignores them for a higher purpose.

The beta mangina’s credo is “there shall be no other god above me than the goddess whose pussy pedestal I swear to polish unto my last day”, and we can see how arousing that is for women. (Not very.) But the jerkboy who knows the value of God Game has placed a higher power above pussy power.

In fact, I’m convinced that the abandonment of Christianity and rapid secularization of the West removed a critical pillar supporting the natural hierarchy from women -> man -> God. When man no longer had God’s pearly gates to polish, his worship was redirected to the pussy below him. But women are constitutionally repulsed by men who worship them (being the object of worship goes against the inclination of women to submit to a sexy, dominant power), so secularism has had the knock on effect of hardening women’s feelings toward the growing brigade of supplicating secular beta manginas. Women have become resentful of the pussy pedestals onto which their areligious men have placed them, and they have reacted to this unnatural state of no-affairs by lashing out at feeb betas and by themselves masculinizing to fill the masculinity void.

Natural born alpha male jerkboys who haven’t lost that supernatural feeling know that God is the perfect foil for wanton woman, serving the role of the “other woman” who incites romance-intensifying jealousy and neediness in his earthly woman. God is an HB10 who shuns careerist cuntery for nurturing femininity and boundless few-strings-attached love. That’s the source of some serous mortal female envy.

The areligious jerkboy is at least smart enough to have replaced God not with one woman, but with many women, so that the only pedestal he polishes is the shrine to his penis that resides in his heart.

The Russia-Trump collusion narrative is a gigantic case study in shitlib and Clintonista psychological projection, misdirection, and straight-up false accusation by Hillary Clinton and her demonic surrogates including John Podesta, James Comey, and now likely Robert Mueller.

Mueller and Rosenstein were on the CFIUS committee that approved the sale despite knowing that, as The Hill reported, “Russian nuclear officials were engaged in a racketeering scheme involving bribes, kickbacks and money laundering,” that also ensnared the Clinton Foundation.

There never was any Russia-Trump collusion; there is, however, Democrat-Russia-Clinton-Deep State-Gaystream Media collusion, finally coming to light.

The short of it: Russia bribed American officials — notably the Clintons, favored special prosecutor Mueller, and Gay Mulatto himself — to secure a 20% stake in American uranium deposits.

Before the Obama administration approved a controversial deal in 2010 giving Moscow control of a large swath of American uranium, the FBI had gathered substantial evidence that Russian nuclear industry officials were engaged in bribery, kickbacks, extortion and money laundering designed to grow Vladimir Putin’s atomic energy business inside the United States, according to government documents and interviews.

Federal agents used a confidential U.S. witness working inside the Russian nuclear industry to gather extensive financial records, make secret recordings and intercept emails as early as 2009 that showed Moscow had compromised an American uranium trucking firm with bribes and kickbacks in violation of the Foreign Corrupt Practices Act, FBI and court documents show.

They also obtained an eyewitness account — backed by documents — indicating Russian nuclear officials had routed millions of dollars to the U.S. designed to benefit former President Bill Clinton’s charitable foundation during the time Secretary of State Hillary Clinton served on a government body that provided a favorable decision to Moscow, sources told The Hill.

Yes, thecunt knows how devious the Russians are because SHE WORKED WITH THEM in violation of US law! It takes a colluder to know a colluder.

From Zman:

The Clinton Foundation has always looked like a money laundering operation.


There are a number of possibilities here. One is incompetence by Clinton. Her team may have started the “Russian hacking” chant without realizing that it would lead back to this deal. That’s another trait of Hillary Clinton. She screws up everything she touches. Going back to her days on the Watergate committee as an entry level staffer, he career is one foul up after another. The only thing she has done well is stay married to Bill. That’s how she stays out of jail and how she keeps getting shot to run another scam.

The more likely answer, though, is the old Progressive habit of accusing others of the very thing they are doing. In this case, she was willing to do business with the Russians, so she just assumed the other side was too. Perhaps it is evidence of a guilty mind or maybe it is something else, but Progressives have a habit, an instinct, for accusing their enemies of crimes committed by Progressives. It muddies the waters and that may be the sole purpose. It is another way of shifting the focus.

Of course, the Cunt Queen will chastise les deplorablés for blowing up “mere conincidences”, but it’s too late for her flim-flamming. See through her we do. (Speaking of thecunt’s perfidy, what’s the latest on the Seth Rich murder investigation? Hmmm?)

Meanwhile, Trump has lowered the boom on that Clinton shill Comey:

And where is the media in all this?


The Senate Judiciary Committee has now launched a full scale investigation into the bribery scandal, although as The Hill columnist Joe Concha points out, the bombshell story is being ignored by the media.

“This important & explosive story from Solomon and Spann of The Hill received exactly zero seconds of airtime on the evening newscasts,” he tweeted.

Man, I am so glad we have Jeff Bezos’ personal blog to keep our democracy from dying in the darkness!

In related Trumperica news, our main man has nominated an antitrust attorney to head the FTC. And if you listen closely, you can hear the soft pfft and pop of the media and silicon valley oligarchs shitting their buttplugs out.

Reader OldFart asked me what I thought of this face:

Physiognomy is the word to describe the face as an index of the character and personality. It is the science — yes, the SCIENCE — of inferring personality traits from facial composition.

My thoughts on Des Shoe’s mug and what it reveals of her innermost nature:

  • manjaw
  • unsmiling, sneering duck lips
  • beady, sociopath eyes
  • ample nose
  • bangable in a fuck piston sort of way, not a marriage material way
  • and last but not yeast, she’s got the thousand cock stare

Her hair is a natural color and she isn’t sporting a bull ring, so I figure she’s not yet fully subsumed into the whore borg.

Verdict: unprincipled urban gogrrl careerthot with pretensions of uber-feminist “resistance” to the Trumpening. Speculative, based on the aforementioned physiognomic details: she has a rifled vagina from a full clip of phalluses firing off inside her.

Let’s see if I hit the bulls-eye.

Project Veritas has released a video of the New York Times Homepage Editor Des Shoe, who was caught on hidden-camera admitting that the Times has a liberal bias and attacking President Donald Trump and Vice President Mike Pence. This is part three of their American Pravda NYT investigation.

When confronted with the notion that during the election, The Times‘ front page, for which she is responsible, was completely focused around Trump. She tells the undercover journalist that NYT reporters tried to influence the election with their reporting:

“I think one of the things that maybe journalists were thinking about is like…Oh, if we write about him, about how insanely crazy he is and how ludicrous his policies are, then maybe people will read it and be like, oh wow, we shouldn’t vote for him.”

She admits that the New York Times has a clearly defined liberal-leaning bias: “The New York Times is not…I mean, it’s widely understood to be liberal-leaning. But, American newspapers are not supposed to claim a bias, they’re supposed to be objective.”


She also tells the undercover journalist that reporting objectively is simply too difficult for the Times: “Our main stories are supposed to be objective. It’s very difficult in this day and age to do that.”

Shoe blames the business model for the New York Times‘ lack of fact-based reporting:

“This is what I was trying to say is like the last couple years it’s changed for the bad…

“I think the business model itself is just… there’s so much panic about what to do that, you know, what else is a company supposed to do?

“That’s the conundrum…is that a business model, in this time is built on what the readers want.”

The New York Times senior homepage editor goes on to explain the positive effect of Trump’s victory: “Since the election, like you know…Speaking on, you know, for The New York Times, our subscriptions have sky-rocketed since…I mean, they call it the Trump bump.”


Shoe finally goes on to explain her personal biases against President Trump, “I feel like Trump is…is just a…is sort of an idiot in a lot of ways. Just an oblivious idiot.”

She also attacks Vice President Mike Pence, implying that his religious beliefs make him unfit to lead:

“If you impeach him, then Pence becomes President, Mike Pence, who’s f***ing horrible…I think maybe, possibly worse than Trump.

“He’s extremely, extremely religious. He [Pence] at one point backed a bill that hinted at conversion therapy for gay people…Which is like electrocution, stuff like that.”

LOL. When memes become real.

Des Shoe is a Southern transplant (gleaned from her Twatter bio) with what appears to be a high T hormonal profile acquired either prenatally or while immersed in the careercunt subculture. Personal details were hard to come by, so I don’t know if she’s still single and careening to a cat lady retirement or married to a betaphag. Her PR face shot is far prettier than her live action face in Project Veritas’ video, so my guess is that as a mediocre looker she gets pumped and dumped a lot by drunk Manhattan chads having an off night, and spends the aftermath rationalizing her romantic failures as a blow for shrew empowerment. It’s a good bet she has participated in one or more slut walks.

My physiognomy analysis was close to the mark, eh? She’s a cog in the worst shitlib propaganda machine in the world, a Trump hater, a rainbow coalition platitude pusher, and has forsaken a calm family life in her hometown for the gritty clitty bottomless brunch abattoir of shattered peak fertility windows.


It won’t surprise erudite and learned guests of the Chateau that anti-White message makers like the NewYorkChaims have been reduced to running their operations like Feedbuzz clickbait warehouses and therefore totally destroying their reputation as serious journalism, given that ad blockers are killing the online revenue generation model. (You better have an ad blocker installed, asshole, or be ready to turn in your shitlord card.)

What should also be understood is that it takes two to tango. The shitlib gaystream media doesn’t operate in a vacuum. Sure, the craven ideological bias and tribal disposition of the vast majority of journowhores practically assures a left-wing slant to the news, but the utter implosion of journalistic integrity and ethics wouldn’t be as spectacular as it has become without a willing shitlib audience who hungers for the swill that the media are ladling into their rattled cortical cages.

The media can be cleansed of shitlibs to help restore objectivity and sanity to the news, but that won’t solve the demand side of the freakquation: there is a needy and vocal American subpopulation — rootless cosmopolitans and virtue sniveling SWPLs — willing to financially prop up anti-White leftoid equalist bullshit “”””reporting””” for the happy feelz it gives them. As long as those people exist, and they are eager to jettison any expectation of standards from their news sources as long as they are imbibing news that assuages their egos, then there will be media outlets ready to serve them.

The solution is not clear, but it has to include delegitimizing the concept of a “mainstream media”, so that shitlibs can no longer comfort themselves that the news they seek out is anything close to a consensus opinion. The readership of Bezos’ personal blog has to feel that they are trapped in an insular newsiverse that just may not be giving them the whole truth.

Long-term, I think the only lasting solution to a debauched partisan media will be secession, either formally or culturally. Freedom of association and organically emergent segregation are the future of multiracial bus depots like America. We’ll either have separate countries with our separate folk-owned and -run news sources, or we’ll have de facto genocultural nations within the boundary of our American nation that effectively filter news sources to appeal to the like-minded residents living in each largely self-governing canton.

The Thousand Tingle Ogle

The Thousand Cock Stare is the vacant crazy-eyed unhinged look that women get when they’ve slutted it up too much and the cavalry of cockas have left psychic scars. It’s a dead womb walking sheen of the eyes that is similar in soul-skinning affect to the “thousand-yard stare” that soldiers manifest when they’ve spent too much time in the charnel fields.

Thankfully, there’s a beautiful inverse of the thousand cock stare that alights on lovely women who’ve devoted their hearts and parts to one man. That is the “thousand tingle ogle”. Any man who has seduced a woman to reckless love knows that look. It’s the look that is at once arousing and comforting to a man, for it says simultaneously, “she will gobble my knob, and no one else’s”. It’s the eyes of a woman who has wedded her lust to her love. Powerful stuff.

A perfect instance of the thousand tingle ogle was caught on camera after a major election win for the forces of Goodness and Whiteness. Count the tingles arcing across the insufferable void between them as pro-nationalist Austrian wünderkind Sebastian Kurz is admired by his girlfriend:

Trump gets that look from women a lot, too. It’s the ocular equivalent of “I’ll let him grab me by the pussy when we get home”.

Sissy-shaming works. From a reader, an update on CH’s Lesser Beta of the Month:

You must really have done a number on that AndrewHuthFruit™! He completely privatised his Facebook, restricted comments on his instagram, and took down his photoblog! One incisive flick of the CH shiv was enough for this cowardly fucker to completely turtle! Well done.

Good. That was the goal. Another mewling mangina trawling for online attention from bitter feminists falls to the Shaming Shiv.

What I DESPISE to my very being are Agents of Ugliness, Messengers of Mutation, Heralds of Hideousness. And Lords of Lies. If a loser accepts the truth of his low station in life and works to improve him or herself, I salute them. I encourage their efforts. But losers who lie that their loserdom is normal, even exceptional, and that their betters should bow and scrape before the ugliness they want to visit on the world, well…they get the shiv.

Male feminists are a loser subspecies. They spread lies about the sexes, and their grotesque rhetoric defying the natural order gives succor to spiteful cunts and gutless worms, who then spread the lies to innocents like a viral infection, lethal to those of weak will. Meanwhile, the onslaught of ugliness, weaponized by a complicit Gaystream Media and attention whoring accelerants like Faceborg and Instawhore, cows the remnant believers in Beauty, until the mutants have occupied the public consciousness, screeching their Pyrrhic victory over common sense and dignity.

Yeah fuck dat noize. The Chateau stands athwart the Disfigurement Delegation, smirking “lol suck a dick, freaks”. I don’t care if this blog is the last outpost of Beauty in the world, the message will be sent to the Fuggernaut in the teeth of active technopoly suppression of realtalkers that there is no safe space for them as long as the Shiv of Plain Speaking is free to unsheathe. The front lines are everywhere.

So to the Andrew Huths of the Mutant Mafia, I say good riddance. Your social media helicopter ride was the necessary sacrifice to discourage the others who might have similar urges to traffic in civilization-wrecking and romance-killing lies. The seep of your stank is turned back at the gates of this humble abode.

Was Stephen Paddock the lone perpetrator of the Mandalay Bay massacre? I don’t know, but the recent spate of missing or deceased eyewitnesses who defied the deep state narrative that Paddock was the only shooter has me questioning everything about the official line on this crime of the century.

Eyewitness A (deceased): Kymberley Suchomel

A woman by the name Kymberley Suchomel, 28, who attended the Oct. 1 Route 91 Harvest Music Festival, passed away Monday at her Apple Valley home just days after she had survived the deadliest mass shooting in modern U.S. history unscathed, reports say.

Suchomel, who posted her eyewitness account of the Las Vegas massacre in astonishingly vivid detail to her Facebook page on Oct. 4, subsequently passed away in her home on Oct. 9 from what reports are claiming were ‘natural causes.’

Shockingly just days before her death, Suchomel posted key details about the shooting to Facebook contradicting the official narrative that Stephen Paddock is a lone gunman. […]

Additionally, the eyewitness reported that she was running with her group alongside “Tropicana Avenue”  when a ‘dark-colored SUV’ slowed and a ‘smaller Hispanic woman’ emerged from the window to “taunt” her group.

“[She] leans out the window, and she yells something we couldn’t understand in a clearly taunting manner. It really freaked us out, because again, we didn’t know who we could and could not trust,” the eyewitness explained.

Could this ‘smaller Hispanic woman’ have been the same ‘short Hispanic lady’ reported by another eyewitness to have threatened concertgoers 30-45 minutes before the shooting started? […]

Update: After the time of this article’s publishing Suchomel’s post is “no longer available.”

Eyewitness B (missing, accounts scrubbed): Chad Nishimura

Moanike’ala Nabarro, a reporter for KITV4 and ABC affiliate wrote a story recently that has been wiped from the internet.  The story was regarding the valet worker named Chad Nishimura who parked Paddock’s car and told Nabarro that he chatted with Paddock briefly before parking his vehicle.

Well, that story has been completely scrubbed from the internet.  Even more strange is the fact that social media accounts for Nishimura have been deleted as well.

According to the ABC affiliate’s report, Nishimura told the ABC Affiliate that Paddock “seemed normal”and that he “didn’t have any bags with him upon arrival.” People are tweeting about the deleted story… […]

When we searched to speak with Nishimura, we found that all social media accounts for him have also been deleted from the internet.  Even his Linkedin profile has been deleted.

Eyewitness C (missing): Jesus Campos

The Mandalay Bay security guard who disappeared last week moments before he was scheduled to break his silence in television interviews has not been seen since he went to a walk-in health clinic, his union president said.

David Hickey of the Security, Police, and Fire Professionals of America (SPFPA) told reporters Friday that he got a text the night before saying Jesus Campos was taken to a UMC Quick Care facility, though he did not specify where or whom the text came from.

A spokesperson at the UMC Quick Care, which has eight locations throughout the Las Vegas area, told Fox News on Monday that they had “heard nothing” about Campos visiting them.

Campos has also claimed there was more than one shooter.

In perhaps related news, it looks like the Globalist Deep State killed the reporter investigating the Panama Papers scandal.

A journalist who led the Panama Papers offshore tax evasion expose was killed today when a bomb blew up her car.

Investigative reporter Daphne Caruana Galizia – dubbed a “one-woman WikiLeaks” – was killed as she was driving near the village of Bidnija in northern Malta.

She had filed a complaint to police a fortnight ago after receiving personal threats to her safety, local media said.

Caruana Galizia ran a hugely popular blog relentlessly highlighting cases of alleged corruption, often involving politicians from the Mediterranean island nation.

In Malta, she had led the coverage of the Panama Papers, a leak of millions of legal documents last year detailing financial details of offshore entities used by the rich and powerful to avoid tax.

The Panama Papers revealed the network of international banks that the globalist elite use to park their money offshore and evade taxes (or launder ill-gotten gains). The Clintons “have multiple connections with people named in the papers“. The Panama Papers also reveal a Clinton connection to the Kremlin and the Russian financial institution Sberbank, via the Podesta Group. Can you say “psychological projection” and “misdirection”?

I, myself, wrote and published this post from an offshore kiosk through multiple proxies and Tor nodes. One can never be too careful when taking on the Democrat-Globohomo-Deep State Collective. Godspeed, President Trump. You are up against malevolent forces that defy credulity.

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