1. Shun losers. They will magnify your worst personality traits.
2. Acknowledge your strengths AND weaknesses. Improve those things about yourself which will benefit most from your efforts and avoid squandering your energy trying to attain minimal competence in areas you are naturally weak.
3. Dispel negativity. Always picture yourself at the top of the mountain looking down than in the valley looking up.
4. Don’t defend your limitations. Your ego can as easily hold you back as propel you forward.
5. Jettison politics from your personal life. Jawing about political ideology is worse than useless — it’s a time suck and a trick played by your status-seeking reptilian hindbrain on your frontal lobes that does nothing to bring you more happiness OR status. Your vote really won’t matter. Don’t believe me? When was the last time a significant election was decided by one vote?
6. It’s OK to hate. Like greed, it clarifies.
7. When in doubt, affect a pose of indifference.
8. Live by a fluid code of ethics. There will be those times when acting unethically will be personally advantageous and relatively consequence-free. In these cases the guilt won’t last more than five minutes.
9. Fuck resolutions. They are for people who couldn’t get their shit together the previous 365 days.
10. You are not a special little snowflake, but you should act like you are. If people are going to form impressions of you it’s better they make false positive ones than true negative ones.
11. Stop living your life as if karma will reward you for your goodness and smite your enemies for their badness. A mystical moral payback system does not exist. See: Chairman Mao.
12. If you are a guy with options, don’t get married. It is a raw deal. If you do get married, and the inevitable shittiness of it reveals itself to you in phony headaches, mundane monogamy, domesticated servitude, escalating expectations, and divorce theft, don’t say I didn’t warn you.
13. There is no such thing as unconditional love. If a girl gains 50 pounds her boyfriend will fall out of love with her. If a guy loses his job and drifts into months of unemployed depression his girlfriend will fall out of love with him. Thinking clearly on this will give you the best chance to find real love.
14. Never compromise on love. It is the only thing in this world that isn’t bullshit.
15. Many of you will think #14 contradicts #13. You would be wrong.
16. The next time you think girls are sugar and spice and everything nice, just remember… they like to be choked.

this is why i ❤ u
and also why i love him
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What isn’t nice about being choked?
May you offend legions more in 2008…
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Shun losers. They will magnify your worst personality traits.
I’ll shun me! That shouldn’t be too hard!
they like to be choked.
Only when you do it.
If you are a guy with options, don’t get married. It is a raw deal.
Instead of spending $30K on a wedding, I can go travel and explore parts of the world like Roosh, but without the clubbing and sex. I’d save $30K on a wedding, and a lifetime of misery from associating with the shitty woman who thinks I’m worth marrying.
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#1 – sounds like a donald trump quote. strive to be a buffett, not a trump
#2 – your weaknesses are your greatest strengths
#3 – must get awfully lonely at the top
#4 – and the ego that propels you forward in the wrong direction?
#5 – ignorance is ignorance. debating the attractiveness of putin is extremely rewarding. your vote is the only vote that matters.
#6 – hatred is reaction – and a blindspot on the human condition.
#7 – the greatest men seek doubt. it is the only way to become better.
#8 – slippery slope.
#9 – yes fuck resolutions. at least the silly ones anyway.
#10 – you ARE a special little snowfake, roissy.
#11 – karma is a bitch. i’m sure she’ll make an appearance in your life.
#12 – a gorgeous woman marries a beta guy…everyone thinks it’s a mismatch…the guy ends up cheating on the wife…the wife can’t understand…she thought by marrying the beta, there’s no way he’d ever cheat on her. he thought “if i can get her, i can get anyone.”
#13 – #15 – prelude to roissy’s 10 commandments?
#16 – irresponsible statement. …only the naughty ones.
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what’s a loser?
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“A mystical moral payback system does not exist.”
i find belief in god useful for various things, including scoring. my brain is unusally good at maintaining various contradictions in it at the same time. i trace it to the copious amounts of organic drugs i did in my youth.
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Tracy Lords (from the last post)
“i’m glad you’ve found your soulmate. i think i finally had my roissy fill. i wish you a v. happy and health 2008. sorry i’ll miss the masterpiece. but then i’m pretty sure it will the normal roissy heat. tschuss.”
Couldn’t even make it one post. Ha!
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vk – as id says, fuck silly resolutions. i change the rules at will. but thx for noticing.
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14. Never compromise on love. It is the only thing in this world that isn’t bullshit.
“Love ordinarily is not love, it is lust. And lust is bound to feel hurt, because to desire somebody as an object is to offend him; it is an insult, it is violent. When you move with lust towards somebody, how long can you pretend it is love? It is just something superficial which will LOOK like love, but scratch a little bit and hidden behind it is sheer lust. Lust is animalistic. To look at anybody with lust is to insult, humiliate him, is to reduce the other person to a thing, to a commodity.
No person ever likes to be used; that’s the most ugly thing you can do to anybody. No person is a commodity, no person is a means towards any end.
This is the difference between lust and love; lust uses the other person to fulfill some of your desires. The other is only used, and when the use is complete you can throw the other person away. His is of no more use to you; his function is fulfilled. This is the greatest immoral act in existence: using the other as a means.”
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16. The next time you think girls are sugar and spice and everything nice, just remember… they like to be choked.
If one did not take mindless platitudes like “girls are sugar and spice and everything nice” seriously in the first place, one would not be tempted to choke them.
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3. Dispel negativity. Always picture yourself at the top of the mountain looking down than in the valley looking up.
Are those the only two choices?
12. If you are a guy with options, don’t get married. It is a raw deal. If you do get married, and the inevitable shittiness of it reveals itself to you in phony headaches, mundane monogamy, domesticated servitude, escalating expectations, and divorce theft, don’t say I didn’t warn you.
Everyone has options, but since you’ve “decided” that marriage is “a raw deal” for everyone then I guess you’re included in that and should you ever get married don’t say I didn’t warn you.
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How about:
1: Crush your enemies
2: See them driven before you
3: Hear the lamentation of their women
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The most important thing about life is balance.
These 16 points are good, but they’re more of a corrective for someone who is chronically negative or wound tight.
On the other hand, an overconfident hedonist could benefit from a corrective in the oppostie direction.
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so is the synthesis of 13-14 simply that real love does exist, but it’s always conditional so be prepared to keep your shit tight forever if you find it?
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[…] Thursday, January 3, 2008 now, this is what i call 2008 Posted by yuE under Life and Ramblings [生活琐事] Grabbing 2008 By The Zeroes […]
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*Don’t believe me? When was the last time a significant election was decided by one vote?*
My college election. One vote
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These 16 points are good, but they’re more of a corrective for someone who is chronically negative or wound tight.
On the other hand, an overconfident hedonist could benefit from a corrective in the oppostie direction.
I like! Roissy is this your mitzvah? Mine is lighting shabbat candles on Fridays. 🙂
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Urgh, democracy’s an illusion anyway. You just have the choice between two or three corrupt tyrants (any man who rises to power surely has to have less moral fibre than Roissy) rather than one and you can change them every so often. It has its advantages but its definitely far away from the ideal country.
ROISSY FOR PRESIDENT.
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‘pretty lies perish’ was better.
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B: Roissy for President. Ass kisser!
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16. …and spanked
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12. “Unless you are absolutely sure that you cannot and will not ever do better than the woman you’re with, avoid marriage the same way you would avoid anal with Magic Johnson.” (Only famous HIV person I can think of.)
Fixed for accuracy.
By the way, your new tag line is way too wordy.
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I love all of these, but especially the one abou New Year’s resolutions. Especially after reading a couple dozen touchy feely sappy blog posts about resolutions all over the blogosphere.
On a side note: why are DC blogs so fuckin good? NY blogs really suck in comparison.
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The next time you think girls are sugar and spice and everything nice, just remember… they like to be choked.
On a less violent if not necessarily more tasteful note, there’s the point that a buddy’s older brother once made, back in my high school days: they [i.e. girls] have to take a dump just like anyone else.
Of course, like with most adolescent males it was very difficult for me to accept the truth of his statement. Too bad we didn’t have 2 Girls 1 Cup back then.
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Its mildly insulting by my standards, really, sara. I JUST stated how moral fibre was completely devoid within presidents etc.
Crazy Americans and your satanic president-worshipping.
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Acknowledge your strengths AND weaknesses. Improve those things about yourself which will benefit most from your efforts and avoid squandering your energy trying to attain minimal competence in areas you are naturally weak.
OK, what if you’re naturally weak on social skills? Anyone see the problem here?
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25 B: My apologies. I was having a bad day. Hormones, you know. Somehow associating “moral fibre” with Roissy-even if only in comparison to politicians-was a bit much.
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http://www.guygetsgirl.com/index.php?hop=starsigns
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17 – don’t ever compromise your own life goals – business or personal – for someone else’s sake. not even a little bit.
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[…] A fine list of Roissy maxims. […]
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[…] 3, 2009 by roissy As I wrote in one of my “Ugly Truths” posts, unconditional love is a happy fantasy sentimental people want desperately to believe […]
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Tom Leykis 101 maxims ?
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[…] instance, no Chateau author claimed that love is a “pretty lie”. In fact, just the opposite has been written: that love is the only thing in this world that isn’t bullshit. So right there, that small […]
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[…] instance, no Chateau author claimed that love is a “pretty lie”. In fact, just the opposite has been written: that love is the only thing in this world that isn’t bullshit. So right there, that small […]
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