Zeets on game:
Me: [while helping him set up a new TV I belch loudly] BEEEEEEEEEEEEEELLLLLLLCCCCCHHHH.
Zeets: Was that a neg? [imitating me approaching some girls] Hi, I’m… BEEEELLLLCHHH… haha hey girls that was a neg! You like me now!
Zeets on long distance cockblocking:
Me: So there’s this girl who lives in another country who loves me. She told me a guy hit on her last night and she turned him down by telling him she had an internet lover.
Zeets: Wow, that guy must’ve felt like shit. Cockblocked from afar!
Me: Yeah, it’s one thing to get cockblocked by another guy in the bar, but to get cockblocked by an internet dude… humiliation!
Zeets: A girl who rejects someone by saying “No, I’m in love with a guy on the internet” is a lot worse than “I have a boyfriend.”
Me: It’s like saying “Your physical presence can’t even compete with an IM”.
Zeets on blogging:
Zeets: Everyone’s got their little blog now. Get up at 1 in the afternoon, trundle to the store to buy organic hipster meuslix, come back and blog about it. [makes exaggerated typing motion with his hands] Blog, blog, blog. Blogging piglets!
Zeets on the consumer culture:
Zeets: Help me carry out this TV. [we were leaving Best Buy with his new 1,000 inch LCD TV purchase]
Me: This is gaudy. You’re rolling out with the biggest package in the place.
Zeets: Notice how all eyes are turned towards me. The women are aroused by my display of materialism. [looks over at a middle-aged woman and winks] A big purchase will make you feel like a man and boost your testosterone major.
Zeets on herbs:
“I WANT TO CRUSH THEM ALL.”
The women are aroused by my display of materialism. [looks over at a middle-aged woman and winks] A big purchase will make you feel like a man and boost your testosterone major.
If you have to pay for it, it’s not worth it.
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Zeets needs a blog. Or a Youtube channel.
In one way or another, we all have to pay for it. Just not always with cash.
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It’s like saying “Your physical presence can’t even compete with an IM”.
I hit a lot of guys with that back in the day. The IM guy was no better than flesh and blood guys around me, and probably worse in many ways. But I couldn’t have him, and so I wanted him all the more more desperately. Now we’re married.
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Zeets (on blogging) described twitter and its lookalikes perfectly. How does one live like that? Reminds me of an exchange from Arthur.
Arthur: Do you know what I’m going to do? I’m going to take a bath.
Hobson [drily]: I’ll alert the media.
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So who is Zeets?
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When life seems too tough to endure, some sex or shopping seems a cure.
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I agree. I love shopping for sex.
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I’m already sick of Zeets.
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Zeets rhymes with Teats. Your nipples, they speak ?
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hipster mueslix?!
Zeets is a genius.
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Fuck you Dr. Grzlickson 🙂
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Raise your hand if you agree that this Grzlickson tit-turd should FOAD.
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#12, I agree.
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Yeah, fuck Grzlickson.
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Wow, I see that the insightful writing and wit that I have come to depend on from this site is well and thriving.
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Scott,
Your contribution has been noted.
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Dr. G is…
Listening to some Randy Newman.
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Zeets sounds like a great guy. What are the tv’s specs?
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*shakes head in agreement with T*
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“Me: This is gaudy. You’re rolling out with the biggest package in the place.”
Translation? I need not say more. LMAO!
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