By the Power of Poon I was able to coax a girl into inadvertently revealing her low quality.
Me: [in my best nonjudgemental voice] Sometimes I think people judge us too harshly for the things we do when we are in love. For instance, I’ve had married women fall for me. I didn’t know at the time they were married, but if I knew… who knows, I may not have ended it. It’s hard to walk away from something so right, you know?
Her: I know what you mean.
Me: Have you ever had a torrid taboo fling like that? One that people wouldn’t understand?
Her: I was with this one guy… he was married.
Me: And even though you knew he was married… you knew, right?
Her: Yes, I knew almost from the start.
Me: You fell for him and it was just about you two.
Her: All I could think about was us. It was like he wasn’t even married.
Me: I can relate. It’s about living in the present, and you can’t imagine it not working out. [laying my hand on her forearm] Did his wife know?
Her: No, not at first, but she must have figured it out eventually. I guess, after a while, I felt like it wasn’t going anywhere.
Me: It’s ridiculous, but people think you should feel guilty.
Her: I never felt guilty, just sad that it ended. I left him when it became clear we were stuck in place.
******
When you get involved with a woman who has had affairs with married men, is she:
a. a cheater at heart?
b. a validation whore?
c. someone who will ass rape you in divorce court and spend the lottery alimony on shoes and lingerie to please her new lover?
d. a histrionic drama queen?
e. a good fuck?
f. an Eternal Ingenue?
g. drawn to provider alphas?
h. an entanglement of daddy issues?
i. usually hot?
j. a scheming, conniving cunt?
k. best kept at arm’s length?
l. never satisfied?
m. trainable by dangling carrots and then pulling them away?
n. friendless?
o. a pump and dump candidate?
p. addicted to badboys, challenge, emotional highs and lows, and regular old drugs?
q. more likely to eat bananas lasciviously in public?
r. all of the above?
One thing is for sure, she is a sucker for wedding ring game.
I’d go with option R.
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Thanks for getting back to the quality stuff, this is fantastic.
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Most women who have affairs with married men tell themselves the same thing: “He’s going to dump the bitch and marry me.”
He hardly ever does.
Peter
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This ties together with Agnostic’s piece on Recognizing an Eternal Ingenue: http://akinokure.blogspot.com/2009/01/recognizing-eternal-ingenue.html
“even still when over 25 or 30, her brain is so awash in hormones that she won’t be able to hide her love for being in love. Plainly what this means is that love is addictive for her, so that once she’s habituated to the flavor of your love drug, she’ll run off to find a guy whose novel taste will excite her like you used to 4 to 6 weeks ago.
Because most of the females who you’d be interested in have a presence in some social network, and because they reveal much more there than they would in person, it’s worth looking over her profile before you get too invested in her. Look for quotations, status messages, picture captions, etc., that sound like these:
“Love as a drug.” Pretty obvious to spot — “I’ve found him, my new addiction.” “The heart has its reasons that reason does not know about” — a typical response that addicts give as to why they keep taking drugs, regardless of what Pascal intended. Etc.”
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s. a gizz rag meant for repeat abuse
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Tests like this are important to screen out women who have no tact and are willing to reveal their indiscretions voluntarily, but even women who pass the test may just be telling you what you want to hear.
In my view, there’s no perfectly pure woman or purely slutty women – there’s a continuum and it’s possible to engineer a situation in which any woman would cheat. Indeed this implicit in the strategy of disarming a woman’s anti-slut defenses.
On a somewhat related note: here’s an example showing how damaging being called a slut can be for a woman:
http://ca.youtube.com/watch?v=YXLbuR9GS0A
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Most women who have affairs with married men tell themselves the same thing: “He’s going to dump the bitch and marry me.”
It’s more complex than that.
They first think
“I wonder if he’s married? Let’s think about that later.”
(a variant is “Good. This will guarantee discreet, no strings attached sex”)
After the sex women return to the thought:
“I think he’s married. Oh well, I have had one night stand before.”
It all depends on the man now. If he leaves it at that, she won’t bother. If he gives signals that he wants to see her again, it will initiate the relationship algorithm in her mind.
“I can’t believe I am seeing a married guy.”
(alternatively – “Why do I always fall for married guys?”)
Once they know for sure, they reach the next stage. The competition is on.
“Just don’t mention her around me.”
This can go well for a couple of weeks. Then it turns into
“I cannot go on like this anymore.” – and the emotional blackmailing starts
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You’re the best Kick a Bitch.
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I love how you framed your questions in a way that would open the flood gates. Masterful!
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Good points. Women generally make decisions on “is the guy hot, socially dominant, and do other women want him?”
Pretty much MOST women will now have affairs with married men, and there is very little female condemnation. To the contrary, most of her girlfriends will find it “hot” and “sexy.”
Women love, just love, stories about some hot young thing screwing an older married stud. Along with stories about cougars banging a young stud or powerful A-Lister.
Probably the best approach is to simply assume EVERY woman you date is like this, and has affairs with married men, until proved different.
Women really don’t care about anything other than “is the guy hot” and “do other women want him?” That’s about it. Well, that and the worse the guy is, the more women want him, in terms of instability and aggression and bad-boy behavior.
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“Women really don’t care about anything other than “is the guy hot” and “do other women want him?” That’s about it. Well, that and the worse the guy is, the more women want him, in terms of instability and aggression and bad-boy behavior.”
And men care nothing about whether the girl is hot or not. They care only about inner beauty, of course. Men want the super-smart, extremely faithful, loyal to a fault girl. Even if she is extremely plain, and doesn’t push his buttons. Except not. Men will forgive quite a lot of transgressions to have a ’10’ on their arm.
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“Her: I never felt guilty, just sad that it ended. I left him when it became clear we were stuck in place.”
– and deep down, she still believes she’s truly a good person at heart. the scariest part about women is their ability to rationalize their wrongs…..i do wrong and know it is that, it’s wrong.
it’s like shitting on someone’s floor. there might be justifications you could fabricate or materialize, but at the end of the day, it’s still shit on someone’s floor. this is the fundamental difference between men and women. their blank checks that they write themselves…..and sleep soundly at night. sick. perverse.
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Despite what they claim, most women would rather be the second wife to a strong man, than the first wife of a weak one.
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Benedict: gotta disagree with you on that one. in the case of the woman sleeping with the married man, the onus is completely on the guy to be faithful to his wife.
not to say that the woman shouldn’t be at least cognisant of the situation, but in terms of sleeping soundly at night or being a good person at heart, she’s got no stake in the marriage so why should she fret about it?
i’m not condoning the behaviour, and i’ll leave out all the karma references, etc. but the point is, if the guy is married, it’s up to him to keep it in his pants. he made the vow, he should be the one losing sleep if he broke it…
jmo
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in the case of the woman sleeping with the married man, the onus is completely on the guy to be faithful to his wife
I don’t agree … the man is more blameworthy than the woman, but that doesn’t mean she is free of all blame. There might be a partial exception if the man has reassured the woman that he’s in the process of divorcing his wife, though in most such cases the woman is naive/deluded for actually believing him.
Peter
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so what if he is married…and i want to have sex with him and he wants to have sex with me..how is that my fault??
i mean what if i dont WANT him to leave his wife…
but im bored with my hitachi???
…just curious…
xoxo
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jmo: Would you still think she has no responsibility in the case where there are children that may suffer from the inevitable dissolution of the marriage?
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suicide- my point exactly
podunk- if the guy’s got children, and he’s so worried about them, then he should be putting them before his ‘urges’. still don’t see how it’s the woman’s responsibility. maybe she just wants to get off and she’s not looking to change the situation. maybe she wasn’t fully aware of his status. either way- they’re his kids, they’re his responsibility ultimately. ’cause really, if he’s looking to score and this woman turns him down on principle, he’ll just find it somewhere else…
jmo
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I love how the slutty women here are out in force defending the home wrecker. Because, of course, male and female sex drives are the same. Right.
Put meat in front of a starving man, and he will eat it. And men are always starving, except those with good wives/gfs who know how to constantly empty their genitalia of sperm. The only starving men who won’t eat are those beaten into submission and fear of meat, i.e. betas.
sucide_blond is one of those chicks who do this, but if she were ever in a relationship and he slept around on her, she’d go apeshit and try to murder the girl. And stay with the guy. And then he’d do it again.
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Benedict Smith:
Well, it would be pretty stupid to think that men in general are any less capable of the same. I’ve known men whom I’d categorize as evil to the core based on their objectively assessed behavior, but who will still look you in the eyes and proclaim an honest belief in their own blamelessness and moral superiority. Even regular people who never really did anything spectacularly bad in their lives, both men and women, will usually have a very distorted view of their episodes of rotten, selfish, or treacherous behavior, in order to maintain the belief that they are the blameless, possibly even wronged party.
Theodore Dalrymple wrote an interesting article that touches this topic. He described the attitudes of violent criminals he dealt with while working as a prison physician. Anyone who thinks that men are less prone to “rationalizing their wrongs” than women should read it:
http://www.city-journal.org/article02.php?aid=1371
Of course, for men who have deluded beliefs that women are typically angelic creatures, the fact that women are also capable this may indeed come as a shocking and scary revelation.
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If women enforced morality on themselves like they used to, we as men could handle that, because also what used to be enforced was the idea that a wife had a duty to service her husband’s sex needs even if she wasn’t in the mood.
We’d just all get married then, and let one faithful woman be ours. And never cheat or leave. The deal worked when the bargain was kept.
But since women actually encourage immorality amongst themselves now and have this blatantly wrong notion that they can have sex like a man, and that sex for her is only for her needs, not his—PUAs reign.
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“love how the slutty women here are out in force defending the home wrecker. Because, of course, male and female sex drives are the same. Right.
Put meat in front of a starving man, and he will eat it. And men are always starving, except those with good wives/gfs who know how to constantly empty their genitalia of sperm.”
It’s ALWAYS women’s fault. Both of them — the homewrecker and the non-servicing wife.
We like meat. If you offer, we take. If you don’t offer, we take elsewhere.
“sucide_blond is one of those chicks who do this, but if she were ever in a relationship and he slept around on her, she’d go apeshit and try to murder the girl. And stay with the guy. And then he’d do it again.”
LOL! Probably damn accurate.
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i suppose i just never assumed that i had THAT much power…i certainly NEVER said i was a good person… im usually pretty clear up front..im NOT that NICE…but of the “differently relation shipped” men i have ever been with i have never considered myself any MORE or LESS guilty of anything…
certainly wasnt because i held some all powerful pu$$y that couldnt possibly be resisted by men….. but now that i think about it…i kinda like that idea…
xoxo
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“Sometimes I think people judge us too harshly for the things we do when we are in love. For instance, I’ve had married women fall for me. I didn’t know at the time they were married, but if I knew… who knows, I may not have ended it. It’s hard to walk away from something so right, you know?”
Excellent way to get information.
Statement – Statement – Statement – Question.
– MPM
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“what used to be enforced was the idea that a wife had a duty to service her husband’s sex needs even if she wasn’t in the mood.”
It was the thought of a man dumping a wife on the street, divorced and destitute that kept wives in line.
Now, the roles are reversed and the courts will ass-rape a man at the whim of his wife.
The only men who should ever get married are those who can afford to have an ex-wife living off them.
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tenmagnet says, “Despite what they claim, most women would rather be the second wife to a strong man, than the first wife of a weak one.”
There are responsible ways of going about this though.
A guy who stays married to a woman who doesn’t think he deserves sex, doesn’t deserve sex. Whoever gives it to him is more of a sucker than he is for staying married to a fraud.
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So exactly when do men get to take some responsibility? I wonder if the married men felt any guilt for breaking his vows?
“If women enforced morality on themselves like they used to, we as men could handle that, because also what used to be enforced was the idea that a wife had a duty to service her husband’s sex needs even if she wasn’t in the mood.”
Yes, because in the past, married men didn’t cheat. That is a very new phenomenom. Except in Victorian times, the leading cause of infertility was all the venereal diseases that men visiting prostitutes would bring back home to the wife.
As far as marriage goes, the major onus of the burden should be on the person who made the promises and vows to be true and faithful. Unless the other woman made some sort of vow along those lines to the wife, then the major transgression is still the husband’s. But how neatly men manipulate things to relieve themselves of any responsisbility.
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“i have never considered myself any MORE or LESS guilty of anything…
certainly wasnt because i held some all powerful pu$$y that couldnt possibly be resisted by men….. but now that i think about it…i kinda like that idea…”
No, I speak for all men when I say there is nothing special about your pussy. Your pussy just happens to be open for business at that particular time.
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suicde_blond, when women start accepting the differences between men and women, you start to understand that you actually get some advantages along with the disadvantages. The power of the poontang is one of them. But feminists have co-opted this into a denial of poontang=power, instead of the granting of poontang liberally to your man=power.
If you’re a feminist, you end up miserable trying to foister an idealism upon the real world that has no basis in reality. And then you wonder how you end up cat ladies.
Hopefully this serves as your wake-up call.
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To the beta boys: if your wife doesn’t service you, it’s because she managed to betaize you or because you chose to marry a women with low sex drive. Your fault, not hers. Women sleeping with married men are a good thing. Assuming, of course, that you’re one of the alpha males she’s sleeping with. If you’re the beta boy and it’s your wife who’s sleeping around… well.. then you lose.
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suicde_blond, when women start accepting the differences between men and women, you start to understand that you actually get some advantages along with the disadvantages. The power of the poontang is one of them. But feminists have co-opted this into a denial of poontang=power, instead of the granting of poontang liberally to your man=power.
If you’re a feminist, you end up miserable trying to foister an idealism upon the real world that has no basis in reality. And then you wonder how you end up cat ladies.
Hopefully this serves as your wake-up call.
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jmo: I surely agree that the married individual would be responsible for the plight of their children, and a majority of the responsibility at that. I cannot see how the homewrecker could get away with no responsibility whatsoever, though — regardless of gender.
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Married women are awesome. In general. But the thing you need to understand about married chicks is, they NEED someone to talk to. It’s not always about the sex. It’s about someone to talk to. It’s about listening.
I’ve had a few recent relationships with married women here in Orange County, CA. The first was a 47-year old cougar. A well-known interior designer in Newport Beach, she had a body of a 20-year old. Simply amazing. However, as I gradually discovered, she was hooked on anti-depressant medication and was prone to wild mood swings and extreme dryness, which made our romantic trysts unpredictable at best.
The second woman was a 32-year old Asian accountant in Irvine. She was recently separated, and had a young daughter. Her quiet, academic demeanor belied an extremely high sex drive. In bed, she appeared to be making up for lost time. Asians are known as over-achievers and this woman certainly lived up to her reputation. When she mounted me, the intensity of the sensations would cause her to make what I called her ‘Ghengis Khan’ face. As a token of her gratitude, she gave me a pair of Gucci horsebit loafers.
The third woman was a 42-year old blonde in Corona del Mar. Slightly plump, but still very attractive, she was married to a successful Bank of America executive in Newport Beach and had two children. With her husband at work and kids at school, our meetings were limited to a succession of ‘nooners.’ As a result of one of our hook-ups, I ruined a nice pair of J.Press grey flannel trousers.
I am not boasting when I tell you I scored a triple-play with all three women in a single day. But it was exhausting work. After months of dealing with the drama, the mess, the danger, and the mood swings, I decided I had had enough. I am at the point today where I would much prefer to settle down with a glass of Château de Chambert, a Davidoff ‘Churchill,’ and a John Buchan novel.
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“if your wife doesn’t service you, it’s because she managed to betaize you or because you chose to marry a women with low sex drive.”
Christ, have you ever been in a relationship?
Sex tapers off after the first 3 months — no more doing it like jungle bunnies 6-7 times a day.
Most women are fine a few times a week, while most men would love a few times a day. Ergo, most men are going unserviced by their women.
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The real power scale looks like this:
alpha dick > pussy > beta dick
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RE: Black Girls
BTW, I think on average Black women are easy lays. Sometimes, extremely easy. The thing with ebony girls, however, is that you have to pick a young (teen) one or a married one. That way, the hunt is more challenging.
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William in OC,
Great tale.
Orange County at its finest (possibly the best place to swoop married women in the US).
You should have tried to hit a grand slam with a Laguna Beach girl.
– MPM
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sorry for the double post earlier.
that being said, Anonymous:
“So exactly when do men get to take some responsibility? I wonder if the married men felt any guilt for breaking his vows?”
—-A married man not getting enough sex at home is being screwed out (literally) of the bargain he made at the altar. His breach is a result of her breach.
The difference between a married man not getting enough sex at home and the homewrecker is the difference between a poor person shoplifting versus a wealthy one.
The poor person steals out of need, and though is guilty of doing something wrong, had valid reasons that society can address (i.e. jobs, education opportunities, charities stepping in, etc.). The rich person shoplifting steals out of the thrill of it.
Both are guilty. But one is way more guilty than the other.
“Yes, because in the past, married men didn’t cheat. That is a very new phenomenom. Except in Victorian times, the leading cause of infertility was all the venereal diseases that men visiting prostitutes would bring back home to the wife.”
—-In Victorian times, women were not supposed to engage in sex at all, and because of it, many men were actually very not acquainted with sexual experience. One story has a man getting married, and upon seeing his wife’s naked body, was disgusted and refused to have sex with her because he didn’t know a female form looked like that.
And the Victorian era saw the rise of feminism. It’s where family planning—-i.e. only having a few children—came about. And what stopped children? Denying them men sex! And since Victorian men were supposed to have a stringent code of manners—i.e. hopelessly betasized—they couldn’t demand it. So prostitution.
Prostitution exists because there are always ball breakers in every society. Its just that nowadays, they have a movement behind them.
“As far as marriage goes, the major onus of the burden should be on the person who made the promises and vows to be true and faithful.”
—-The onus of sexual morality is always on females. Look at gay men—freed of the sexual restraints of women, they have sex with abandon. Women do the choosing in the hetero world; they control the floodgates.
“Unless the other woman made some sort of vow along those lines to the wife, then the major transgression is still the husband’s.”
—The major transgression is still the woman, for whom society offers more protection than the man. Her life is cocooned in the taxes and social programs designed solely to allow lesser-qualified females to retain power and positions and security they haven’t earned off the backs of men. Since society overwhelmingly helps her and hurts him, it is her job to see that the basis of the society, i.e. the nuclear family, remains intact.
The cheating woman destroys what sustains her.
“But how neatly men manipulate things to relieve themselves of any responsisbility.”
—It’s neat how feminazis and beta males try to state that the sex drive of the male is his own problem and women who cheat and break social contracts are actually better people. All evidence to the contrary, there is still an Easter Bunny in this world.
Facts, as John Adams said, are stubborn things.
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Laguna Beach Girls? Been there, done that. I have a house there. LG Girls are fucked up, as a rule. Really fucked up. Extremely damaged.
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LB Girls, I meant…
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For married women in Orange County, check out the Quiet Woman bar/restaurant in Corona del Mar. The place is dripping with wet pussy.
I used to walk in there and within 2-3 minutes hook up with a cougar or horny younger woman. I once fucked a cougar in one of the side streets off PCH (Pacific Coast Highway). After we finished, she drove me to her house in her red Porsche and we slept it off.
I also met the webmaster of UrbanCougar.com there one night.
I think OC is the original home of the cougar.
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William in OC,
No doubt.
Plus, if you tear thru the place you will have a target on your back from every guy there.
I lived in CDM for 9 months once.
I was swooping mad girls there and had half the guys from Newport to Laguna edgy at me.
This was years ago. People there still have grudges.
Still, I make it there sometimes to do damage.
– MPM
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Pupu’s expressive votes: H.E.L.P.
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No, not necessarily. What you write is only true for beta boys who think that they can relax once they are in a relationship. They get comfortable, they get betaized and her sex drive wanes.
I fucked up the quotes. Reposting:
No, not necessarily. What you write is only true for beta boys who think that they can relax once they are in a relationship. They get comfortable, they get betaized and her sex drive wanes.
Most men are beta. If your chick doesn’t want to do it multiple times per day, get another one. Or go to her purse and pick up your balls that she’s carrying around.
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William in OC,
Ha.
I used to live right behind the Quiet Woman on 2nd ave.
I know it well.
– MPM
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MPM ~ Good for you! There are definitely more than enough married women in OC to go around. I’ve had blow-jobs from married women at Tentations (when I was younger) and hook-ups with female colleagues on out-of-town trips. I’ve seen some pretty crazy things. It’s all good.
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“M with the dot
To the beta boys: if your wife doesn’t service you, it’s because she managed to betaize you or because you chose to marry a women with low sex drive. Your fault, not hers.”
Grotesque oversimplification. There are other obvious possibilities than the “either or” you mentioned. There’s even such a thing as women who marry alphas and suddenly lose interest in sex shortly after the vows are taken.
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HR Lincoln:
Reminds me of a joke:
Q: Have you heard about the Jewish girl rash?
A: She gets it on her knees when you put a ring on her finger.
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William in OC,
La Jolla can be decent too. Especially in Summertime.
Winter – not enough volume.
And The Del Mar Racetrack, of course: http://www.thegmanifesto.com/2008/07/del-mar-racetrack-part-ii.html
– MPM
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The cheating woman destroys what sustains her.
“But how neatly men manipulate things to relieve themselves of any responsibility.”
—It’s neat how feminazis and beta males try to state that the sex drive of the male is his own problem and women who cheat and break social contracts are actually better people. All evidence to the contrary, there is still an Easter Bunny in this world.
Facts, as John Adams said, are stubborn things.
So men are not responsible for anything, any vows or promises in relationships, and it is solely up to the woman as to keep things together. With that attitude, no wonder marriages fall apart, with divorce rates especially high in the so-called Bible Belt, where that attitude prevails. No one can keep a relationship going by themselves, and as long as one party apparently feels it is ok to break their vows to be faithful whenever they feel they don’t get “serviced” enough, a marriage is not going to be very sustainable. What happens if your woman is on bedrest, or on chemotherapy, or is depressed? Screw some other chick I guess. And then blame the other chick.
The older the woman, the less chance of divorce.
The more educated the woman, the less chance of divorce.
The fewer the children, the less chance of divorce.
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Lurker, great point:
“If you’re a feminist, you end up miserable trying to foister an idealism upon the real world that has no basis in reality. And then you wonder how you end up cat ladies.”
Denial is a bitch and leads to far more unhappiness than acceptance of the differences while providing for freedom of choice.
As for women dating married men: Nobody wants to eat in an empty restaurant do they ladies. A ring on your finger is a testament to a man’s desirability. Being sexually competitive, many women will take it as a challenge.
Furthermore I highly suspect that there is a pheromonal basis for women’s interest in “taken” men. Women are never more solicitous than when another woman’s juices are still evaporating from your manhood.
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Women are never more solicitous than when another woman’s juices are still evaporating from your manhood.
Jesus Christ, I couldn’t have put it better myself, but you’re right. Well said. I got a lot of pussy when single, like Anonymous Alpha, but now that’s I’m attached, the p-quotient has increased two-fold at least. WTF?!
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re: to M with the dot…
sounds like some of that infamous male rationalization Vladimir was referring to! Many alpha/PUA’s are full of it. Of course considering such behavior gets them laid, why wouldn’t they be?
I maintain however, that wrong is wrong. Sleeping with a married person crosses a line in my book.
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I was responding to this above, btw (forgot to refresh and this thread exploded)
”
To the beta boys: if your wife doesn’t service you, it’s because she managed to betaize you or because you chose to marry a women with low sex drive. Your fault, not hers. Women sleeping with married men are a good thing. Assuming, of course, that you’re one of the alpha males she’s sleeping with. If you’re the beta boy and it’s your wife who’s sleeping around… well.. then you lose.”
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MPM ~ I haven’t been down to La Jolla, though I’m familar with the area. The nearest I’ve been recently is Baja. I was recently in La Paz in Baja, Mexico, and the (White) Mexican pussy that surrounded me was unbelievable. I hooked up within 1 hour of hitting the bars in La Paz. I guess the senoritas like tall, blond surfer-type dudes like me. Which makes me sort of optimistic about Mexican immigration to the US. If more Mexican girls mate with more White guys, how bad can the outcome be? Plenty bad, I suspect, but not as bad as the alternative (ethnic cleansing or genocide).
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Gotta admit, Lurker’s gotta quite a few points there. Hmm.
William and AlphaDom: both of you are correct, Women have a much higher sense of smell than do Males, and can literally smell another Woman’s vaginal juices on you, no matter how hard you may try to wash it off or cover it up. It is in the secretions sexually, of the Male and Female, that carries the strongest odors, for the purposes of breeding. As we all know, other animals on the planet, will often sniff each other as part of the mating ritual. Perfumes and colognes are an extension of this in Human terms (the Kama Sutra taks about these things at some length.).
In PUA-speak, Women are very social animals, much moreso than are Men, and as such, are very influenced by their group or, groups of other Women. As a rule, Women get sexually aroused by a Man who has been “Preselected” by another Woman or group of Women; he has proven the ability to acquire other Females, perhaps is able to provide and sexually service them, and so on. Therefore, he has value, and she wants to participate in that for the sake of her children, should she have any with him, and so on. As has been mentioned earlier, Women would rather have a timeshare on a successful Man, than have “half a Man” all to herself.
Simply put, the whiff of Pussy on you will definitely turn other Women On.
Holla back
The Obsidian
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Maybe there is a market there. Sell bottled “eau de twat-lette” to the desperate beta boys. If you could isolate the pheromones I think you’d have a winner.
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Mu, they don’t sit down and talk about it for the same reason a pimp doesn’t sit down and talk to a hoe about how come she’s slow about bringing his money.
Many, many, many if not most married women today are their husband’s pimp. See, it’s as I keep saying but nobody wants to believe:
Whores don’t like sex.
Their dream is to get some sucker to marry them so they can get paid without having to shag anyone.
This is not to say that they won’t cheat. They will do it sometimes for the ego validation, if they can get away with it, but just about every married hoe I know puts their man in a situation where he will be the villain if he goes out to get his needs met. She can live without sex for the rest of her life except when she needs to do him to make another baby to extort him with.
Enforcement of monogamy + extreme feminism pretty much guarantees a whore-as-wife scenario. Who else would want to bind a man to such a contract that he’d lose half his income because she decided to stop having sex with him and he got his needs met elsewhere, but a hoe?
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kthulah: Thanks for the most negative assessment of marriage I have ever read in my life — especially coming from a woman.
However, there are all these supposed “sex positive” feminists on the Internet. Any thoughts on that? And aren’t women who are non-sexual more pawns of religion than feminism?
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Oh, and I forgot to add:
They don’t want to shag their husbands, but they don’t want anyone else to either. That’s the big difference between a hoe and a wifely type with a low or incompatible sex drive. The latter will allow him to get his needs met, and maybe even help him do it.
To a hoe, other women are a challenge because hoes are less sentimental and more function oriented. This is one reason I keep trying to help guys get their heads out of their arses. Love isn’t logical. It’s not supposed to be.
Greed however, is logical. A wife is in love and knows you love her, so your shagging or even loving other women doesn’t preclude you loving her. A hoe doesn’t love you. She just wants to make sure you’re bringing home the money and not spending it on someone else.
She is sure that if you fall in love with another woman, you will leave her because if she met a man who wanted her and made more money, she would leave you.
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Days of Broken Arrows:
“However, there are all these supposed “sex positive” feminists on the Internet. Any thoughts on that? And aren’t women who are non-sexual more pawns of religion than feminism?”
—–Wrong.
Sex positive feminism is nothing more than feminist selfishness ratched up by pornography.
In sex positivism, Feminists seek to “reclaim” sex –from men–and so the emphasis is on masturbation (which requires no men),
multiple partners (lessening the chances of her getting married or becoming attached to a man for love),
lesbianism/ sexual identity play (because most feminist theorists are man-haters who want nothing more than to remove men completely),
and, of course, the huge feminist lie that women should only have sex with her husband/man if she wants it.
Oh, and “role playing” so that a woman “only temporarily” has to “pretend” she is a dutiful 1950s housewife or a servile catholic school girl.
“Sex positivism” came about because some feminists noticed that they actually liked having sex with men and liked having sex submissively. Feminists, instead of admitting that this was ok, began diverting the female sex drive outside of men, psychologically shielding women from their natural roles as receivers, or emphasizing female self-centered superiority in sex. All is a big ploy to keep women from being women.
Religions (at least the real ones, not the post 1960s cult ones) demand obedience of wife to husband, especially in sex. They encourage early marriages to keep the sex contained and fruitful.
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Days, a person can be non sexual for a variety of reasons. A woman nowadays who has no interest in sex, has no business marrying anyone.
So you have to wonder why a woman who doesn’t like sex would basically enslave someone who does.
Not liking sex does not make anyone less evil or more religious. As a matter of fact, I think the more evil or less mystically inclined someone is, the less they actually like sex. Sex is just a means to an end for them. They get none of the creative inspiration and bonding that less malicious or more “flakey” people get from it.
I’m not connecting evil with non mysticism. I’m just saying that in both of those cases, something will probably be missing that would be there in someone who had good will at least towards the person they’re shagging, or who could suspend judgement just long enough to get “lost” in the hormonal surge hallucinations for awhile.
As far as “sex positive” feminism…wasn’t feminism always supposed to be “sex positive”?
Heh…Not when people who condemn men for thinking they’re invaders/violators by having intercourse, and yet teaching them that very same thing.
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Tood, that’s easy. Pick a decent woman who doesn’t need the paperwork or your money.
There are a few out there who aren’t “sea cows” like me. 😉
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I seem to remember a very famous male/female couple from the 70s. When she died, he admitted that he had never had “penetrative” sex with her, because in their wapred thinking, it was rape.
Beta.
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I always though that part of being a man and not some sort man-child was being responsible, taking responsibility for one’s actions and keeping one’s word. Anyone disagree?
Oh, and I’ll post those younger women/older men stats this weekend, I just need to clear some things.
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Rtother, you keep one’s word when it’s an honest deal.
Truth: Married men with wives who take care of them will not cheat. If your balls are drained, you aren’t screwing anyone.
In that situation, if you cheat, you’re a cad.
However, if, as in the 99% of cases, she isn’t putting out, the fault lies with the wife. The man did do something wrong, and stole a piece of meat, but only because she stopped feeding him.
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P.S. on a side note,
Do you know why your grandfather found pornography “disgusting”? Far from being merely the product of stricter religious upbringings (which also taught women to give to their man like no tomorrow), your grandfather got all he wanted from your grandmom. He got so much, to even look for another woman was tiresome. If your balls are sore from humping, and some woman hits on you, since your sex drive is gone for a while, you start to notice her flaws: her fake breasts, bad eyebrows, scars, bruises, etc. Try it the next time you’ve had a sex marathon: go out to a meat market. I guarantee that you’ll be so sick of women that you’ll be judging them up and down like ch does, only with 10x more vehemence.
Pornography follows feminism; the two are linked. When feminists get mad at “objectification” of women in it. Like there’s any other way to want a woman sexually. Anyway, we retreat into it when the real life versions are shrewish and sex denying and unwilling to yield.
Your grandfather probably didn’t have much of a sex-fantasy life, because he didn’t need it.
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m
Such behavior gets them laid? Yeah. Such behavior gets me laid. It’s funny how so many of the posters here keep on acting and thinking like betas, even when they’ve been shown the way. Take for example the overly concern that many posters have when it comes to the question of whether a woman is a slut or not. Is it important to screen? Yes. But I have the feeling that the posters are driven more by their m/w complex rather than a genuine desire to screen out psychologically unhealthy women. All these complaints about “sluts” and the players/badboys they fuck are very… beta.
Resentment and bitterness won’t get you laid.
Tood
I’m keyboard jockeying now: Do you have to be married in order to have kids? No. Do you have to be married if you want to live with a woman? No. Is marriage a prerequisite for being a good father? No. Marriage is just a stupid legal contract that can (and probably should) be ignored.
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Interesting how the guys on this comment section who admit to boffing married women don’t seem particularly ashamed about it, and indeed seem to brag about it, yet no one seems to be castigating them for it. Could it be that men and women aren’t so different after all? Nah, of course not. Men are animals, and should not be expected to try to control their animal instincts. Women are moral, pure creatures, and threfore are required to control their animal instincts.
Whiskey is right, since the modern women is obviously unable to control her animal instincts, women’s choices should be taken away, and they should be re-distributed in a fair (yet undetermined) fashion. I’m not sure why we just don’t stop alpha guys from hogging all the girls, which seems that it would have the same effect as trying to stop women from flocking to the alphas.
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“What if a man really wants to have children of his own (and a two-parent family)?
Given how severe of a risk marriage is for a man in America today, how can one reconcile this need?
Personally, I want only two things in life :
1) To not be destitute and humiliated
2) To have children.
Sadly, item 2) is in direct conflict with item 1), under US divorce laws.”
An increasing number of men are giving the big “Fuck you” to anti-male marriage laws and using egg donors and surrogate mothers.
http://www.nytimes.com/2008/09/07/fashion/07single.html?partner=permalink&exprod=permalink
It ain’t cheap, but it’s cheaper than child support, alimony, and giving up half your assets.
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OK, just got done 1st shift. Lemme jump in here.
Im not quite sure what point he wishes to convey with this post: if he’s askin whether Women can and do cheat, the answer is yes. If he’s asking whether this particular Woman is a Slut, perhaps in my book; it all depends on her overall track record, assuming such information were available and documented.
What kinda bothers me about this post is that the actions of the married Man are not taken into account. True, the Woman involved is wrong, depending on your POV. But to my mind, the really guilty party here is the married guy, because he has a wife at home who doesn’t know what’s going on. If, on the other hand, he and his wife have come to an understanding, then that’s something different and I have no problem with that. But more often than not, that’s not the case, and I think we all know that.
Last year he posted about two prominent adulteresses-one Woman out of the UK who had gotten pregnant by her lover, the other the infamous Lois Feldman. In both cases, my condemnation was swift and sure. I have to be consistent. The married guy has some ‘splainin’ to do.
Moving to Whiskey’s point (still waiting for clarification on your “Peyton Manning/Jimmy Kimmel” comments), and picking up on Canty’s remarks elsewhere, Game acknowledges the Truths of the Human Condition, in this case, wht truly drives Women. Which is, the things he mentioned. We can argue the right and wrong of it till we’re all blue in the face, it won’t change a darned thing, until or unless we openly and unabashedly remove the right of Women to choose their mates and force on them the likes of Manning and Kimmel, whether they want or like it or not, for the good of Western Civ. Unless I misunderstand Whiskey’s central thesis, this is what he’s saying, a kind of Sexual and Romantic Affirmative Action program for somewhat socially inept White Guys. If im misunderstanding his view, he and anyone else can please correct me.
Polygamy has always been with Human Beings, because Human Beings-Males in particular-tend toward being Polyamorous. True, some societies manage things a bit better than others, and I’m a bit wary about making it official public policy. Still, no matter what my or anyone else’s views, its been around since before Biblical or Vendantic times and by the looks of thins ain’t likely to go away any time soon.
Just as Men like Women who are easy on the eye, Women like Men other Men and definitely other Women respect/admire and desire, in that order, fullstop. And, as Monica Lewinsky and Rielle Hunter, just to name a scant few have shown us, there is no shortage at all of Women who are eager and willing to share a Worthy Man. That’s just a fact of life.
What continues to boggle my mind is how many people continue in their naivete wrt these things. It is downright silly to expect our primary mates to be all things to us all the time. Moreover, insofar as Men are concerned, it should go w/o saying that the more dominant, ambitious, energetic and focused he is, the more likely he has the kind of voracious sexual appetite that Wifey simply isn’t able-or willing-to handle on her own.
So, why don’t these couples sitdown and talk about it? And come to some kind of understanding? Maybe a divorce is in the works, fine. But if the Victorian Era has taught us anything, among a great many examples, its that it ain’t the first time an otherwise respectable couple has had an “understanding”.
Comment & Reply, Invited…
The Obsidian
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anonymous
It won’t be long now before a beta tries to rationalize the double-standard using ev psych. It’s very interesting actually – I could understand the behavior if it resulted in guys becoming more attractive, having more sex or having better relationships. But I see no evidence of that being the case.
Loving women for the amoral little creatures that they are is so much easier than trying to shame them into behaving in the way betas would like them to behave.
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Anon:
One general rule to follow: Never take anything the NY times says seriously, especially trend pieces.
If you look closely at the article, you’ll see that practically every organization reports that gay men are doing the vast majority of this surrgate children thing.
The writer, in the NY times way, tries to “prove” that straight men are doing it in increasing numbers, but tries proving this via a quote that states the following:
“Gail Taylor, a founder of Growing Generations, one of the largest surrogacy agencies with about 100 births a year, said 24 percent of its clients this year are single men, both gay and straight. That number is double what it was three years ago.”
That quote does not separate gays from straights in the survey. So there is no statistical proof given that straight men are making babies without mamas at a higher rate.
The NY Times trend pieces are perhaps the worst of that fishwrap’s reporting; basically, a NY Times reporter notices his other SWPL friends at cocktail parties talking about how one guy in one place they heard about adopted kids/surrogated them, and that sounded like something the NY Times wanted to promote. So with only a firm belief in “this is how it should be” and a few selective quotes, the article gets written.
I love how the article quotes Ricky Martin as proof of non-gay men doing this. Yeah, dude’s a classic closet case. George Michael from Menudo.
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lurker
Fixed that for you.
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both are true.
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Anonymous:
“So men are not responsible for anything, any vows or promises in relationships, and it is solely up to the woman as to keep things together.”
—Nope. The man has to be the man: provide for her, fix (or get thigns fixed) around the house, take care of any of (his) childrenby her, and not screw around when his wife his very willing to service him.
“With that attitude, no wonder marriages fall apart, with divorce rates especially high in the so-called Bible Belt, where that attitude prevails.”
—-Yes, because divorce rates along the Northeast corridor are so low by comparison.
Divorce rates are high in the Bible Belt because of poverty, mostly due (as ch has said) to the lack of blue collar jobs. And, of course, feminism does creep in from time to time. Infideltiy divorces are common in the liberal cities, not the conservative ones.
“No one can keep a relationship going by themselves, and as long as one party apparently feels it is ok to break their vows to be faithful whenever they feel they don’t get “serviced” enough, a marriage is not going to be very sustainable.”
—Please. As if women won’t break their vows if their man doesn’t properly obey their every command nowadays. Women run to the alpha and sleep around at the first signs of weakness in their man.
Women are almost always the first to bail on a “relationship” (such a feminist term).
It is perfectly fine to break a vow if she’s already broken it. She’s not pleasing her man’s sex drive, he’s going somewhere else. He doesn’t bring home the moolah or have high social standing, she’s going to find somewhere else to get her sense of self worth.
“What happens if your woman is on bedrest, or on chemotherapy, or is depressed? Screw some other chick I guess. And then blame the other chick.”
—Straw man, dingbat. This situation is where a woman chooses not to sleep with her man except when she is horny.
Depressed chicks have no excuse: turn over and take it, or risk being more depressed by his finding a 22 year old aaerobics instructor. Sickness is an excuse, and it is legitimate, because you sign up for sickness or health.
“The older the woman, the less chance of divorce.”
—Because she’s choosing from the omegas left over. They’ll never leave her, and she’s too lonely at that point to run away.
“The more educated the woman, the less chance of divorce.”
—You confuse smart with educated. A common misconception in this day and age. A woman with a degree in women’s studies is the opposite of smart. And most educated women don’t get married, mostly because they waste their lives with degree-itis or career-itis and think men should be attracted to them because of it. If we wanted easy sexy from a colleague, we’d go gay. Men want women, not clones of men.
“The fewer the children, the less chance of divorce.”
–At what point were we discussing children?
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I’d just like to chime in and point out that if we take things to their logical conclusion…that we have a system that specifically offers incentives for women to break up their families via no-fault divorce, and now see this idea that not only women, but MEN should forgo the traditional means of creating families by marrying and having children, but instead to have them with surrogates via in vitro fertilization…
…is this not the literal manifestation of the Brave New World that Huxley foretold?
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Again, Lurker’s got a powerful point, and is something I note w/particular interest that none of the Jezebel/Feministing crowd never, ever addresses. Let’s hear it for personal responsibility, to say nothing about basic fairness.
Having said that, Anon makes a good point about the Men who sleep w/Married Women.
Nicole’s arguments against Marriage insofar as Today’s Men are concerned are powerful, indeed. ‘Nuff said.
And AlphaDom, hunters have long used the piss of Does to attract Bucks. I’ve done it, it works like a Mutha. It can most definitely be done w/Humans.
Holla
O
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Since this article is in the ‘marriage is for chumps’ category, there is one issue in your writings that is absent.
What if a man really wants to have children of his own (and a two-parent family)? What if a man wants to have kids and enjoy sharing hobbies with them, watching them grow, etc.
I think this is an innate human need, not just for women. I am sure ch would like to have a son, who he can teach Game to at an early age.
Given how severe of a risk marriage is for a man in America today, how can one reconcile this need?
Personally, I want only two things in life :
1) To not be destitute and humiliated
2) To have children.
Sadly, item 2) is in direct conflict with item 1), under US divorce laws.
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R with a massive dose of D^1000 and an extra hint of A
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True obsidian, just don’t think selling bottled piss would fly with the FDA. In very limited quantities it could work for personal use though. I’d bet too the source would be relevant. It’s shown women can determine the attractiveness of a man from the pheromones in his sweat. Probably the younger and more symmetrical the gal, the more effective her piss. Hmmm… seen/read “Perfume”
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Alpha Dom,
The FDA is irrelevant, this sort of thing has been going on for centuries in HooDoo circles and the like, which is ironic, given one of the classic pickup lines is “Do you believe spells work”?
We’ve all heard of this: in order to have a Man fall in love (or at least in thrall to) a Woman, she prepares some food into which she introduces a bit of her menstrual blood; he consumes it, bang, he’s hooked. I’ve personally known guys who’ve been roped in in such a fashion, AD.
So when I ask gals that question I’m not just pulling stuff outta thin air.
A Woman’s scent downstairs changes depending on the time of month. When she’s “ripe” it’s quite strong. Ask the Ladies here, they know, *and* they can smell other Women “in heat” as well. We clueless guys usually can’t.
Holla
O
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Tenmagnet… did someone still my nickname?
Oh wait, minor diff. You can keep it.
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what used to be enforced was the idea that a wife had a duty to service her husband’s sex needs even if she wasn’t in the mood
Wow, that sounds like a perfect sex partner. A woman that I hand over my salary to in exchange for some awful sex. Oh wait, expensive awful sex is better than masturbating to free porn. Ooops.
If you’re the beta boy and it’s your wife who’s sleeping around… well.. then you lose.
Well, if you’re stupid enough to believe that a woman would enjoy your beta ass, then yes, you deserve to lose.
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Dave, id take option one ANY DAY over jerking it to a magazine pic or video feed. You’re borderline antisocial.
Please check the Inaugural Balls thread. I left something for you.
O
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polygamy is natural and has been in civilizations history far longer than our current concept of marriage. So this behavior doesn’t surprise me. I’m on my way out of a marriage (due to her physical and emotional frigidity) and sometimes I think we could still hack it together if she’d just accept me having sex affairs with other women. I could put up with her as a “roomate” and the rare sex with her is still good. An open marriage would be ideal but she just can’t hack that probably because of social acceptance more than her real needs. The sex is just too rare to be considered an acceptable exclusive relationship and that’s a shame. I keep telling her that I got married to her; I didn’t join the priesthood. My urges are stronger and more primal than hunger.
One of the reasons I started lurking here is so that I can perhaps change the dynamics of the next LTR by being more dominant so that the slow creep into frigidity doesn’t happen. But it might happen again. I could always get quality women, but I have trouble being in enough control to get what I need out of it.
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“Monica Lewinsky …[sic]…eager and willing to share a Worthy Man”
Well sort of. Monica’s testimony was that Bill credibly had a nearly sexless marriage. So Monica was clearly willing to share with Hilary because it wasn’t really sharing. But when she was denied access at the White House gate and the Secret Service guy told her that he was with Walter Mondale’s daughter (whom he also was banging), she went ape shit. Clinton in a fit of rage wanted the Secret Service guy fired for telling Monica about Mondale’s daughter but later cooled down. So Monica wasn’t willing to share with another hot woman.
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JerrDogg,
For what its worth im very sorry you’re in the pickle you’re in, man. No Man should have to suffer in such a way.
Again, Lurker and Nicole’s arguments in this regard are hard to beat, and I would just love to get the Jezebel Crowd in on this one. There is such a thing as a Wife refusing to do her Duty, and while Dave Alex is reading along, yea, in Life everything ain’t one long Recess/Playtime Break. Life entails duties, and in a Marriage, Sex is one of em. Doesn’t mean that it has to be drudgery all the time, but it does mean that it won’t shake the rafters everytime either. Adults understand this.
JerrDogg, also appreciate the clarification wrt Lewinsky. But I think we can all agree that Hillary probably wasn’t putting out for Bill, and to be honest that’s probably a good thing, given her looks. Im just sayin’.
Holla
O
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Dave, id take option one ANY DAY over jerking it to a magazine pic or video feed. You’re borderline antisocial.
So in other words, banging a lifeless fake orgasming women is better than wanking off? Only the most delusional and desperate of males would accept such a plight. Hell, the girl in porn is more likely on average to be better looking than my wife and my hand is beating the (few) orgasms that I was getting from real world sex…
Either she wants to have sex or she doesn’t. I will not tolerate pity/duty sex because I have my dignity and her enjoyment is necessary for my enjoyment.
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“Her” enjoyment? Dude, you’re dealing with an inaminate object for Pete’s sake.
No one’s arguing that a sexless marriage is ideal or grand. Definitely not. But one still has a chance for real human interaction there, and if not there, with someone else.
I would argue that JerrDogg has just as much a sense of dignity as you do, in fact I’d argue moreso than you, Dave. Why? Because unlike you, a Man who don’t know what it is to actually be in such a situation like his, he’s not throwing up his hands and grabbing up the latest issue of whatever it is that gets you off-he’s gonna find a Woman who’s willing to do him, and to that I say, Good on him!
You should be taking notes.
O
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This reminds me of Chris Rock’s Pussy payments that were the equivalent of alimony…
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Gentlemen,
It is not uncommon for the husband to be the one who avoids having sex with his wife. And this is not just if the wife is a warpig. It happens with wives who are 7s and 8s, and even in the first 3 years of marriage.
The man’s sex drive (for his wife at least) can be switched off by things as simple as her nagging him, belittling him, dressing poorly in the house, etc.
This is more common than you think.
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Child support applies whether the father was married to the mother or not.
In fact, it can be applied to a man who is NOT the father (cuckolding).
Child support is the most ruinous expense that a man faces in divorce, partly because child support is something a pre-nup cannot shield a man from. Alimony and asset division CAN often be thwarted by a properly-done pre-nup.
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No one’s arguing that a sexless marriage is ideal or grand. Definitely not. But one still has a chance for real human interaction there, and if not there, with someone else.
For a fraction of the cost of a sexless marriage, I can go find a female friend and do stuff with her. All the benefits of female companionship with none of the responsibilities of marriage. Hell, you can find a bored single mom, hand her some pity paychecks if you feel like playing beta daddy.
he’s gonna find a Woman who’s willing to do him, and to that I say, Good on him!
That’s because he feels that he can find another woman and he has no qualms about using the game. I’m much more realistic about my chances.
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How can I teach my man Game without letting him know? I think I might be an Eternal Ingenue. I’m finally in love with a man that I want to stay in love with. He’s a confident, charming Alpha with men and other women… but we’ve been together 2 years now and he’s starting to be more ‘sensitive’ … to my whining. When I’m being whiny and unreasonable, I just want him to ignore me or treat me like a child– not to try to appease me. The only times I’m attracted to him now are when I see him charm younger, prettier girls. I want him to be more alpha… how do I teach him without being obvious?
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I want him to be more alpha… how do I teach him without being obvious?
Don’t waste your time, find a real alpha, or hell, a guy who already knows game.
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He left out one important option in his list. The variety-seeking woman, the one who values the challenge and attention of a married man, may be hormone-driven. This article describes how high oestradoil (estradiol in the US?) is linked to greater promiscuity…
http://www.news.com.au/story/0,27574,24913504-23109,00.html
What we need now is a breathalyser-type test for this one. …Or the hourglass figure and aggressiveness may be sign enough already.
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jean,
be careful what you wish for. if he has the basic physical features needed to be a potential alpha, maybe he’ll learn enough game to dump you for a hotter, younger chick. or do you feel that you’re irreplaceable? if he treats you well then consider yourself a lucky girl.
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Jean,
You have it pretty good. Remember that a woman’s desirability drops sharply after age 35. Don’t make him learn Game.
Consider not being ‘whiny and unreasonable’ in the first place. Why try to change him before changing yourself, particularly when you have recognized the trigger point?
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Jean,
There is a book called ‘The Five Love Languages’ by Gary Chapman.
You seem to be someone who wants to put effort into enhancing your relationship. As a woman, that book has good learnings you can implement into yourself.
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The psyco-babble on this board seems to apply to me personally.
I’ve never had much trouble attracting women, especially the good ones that want a LTR, and I’m thankful for my good luck as most men are not so fortunate. As a result, I was also able to be choosy and this probably came off to women as a desirable “alpha” like trait. I was able to get some of the most attractive, nice, and smartest women you’ll ever meet. But as a result of the easiness I got lazy and as a consequence I got away with being more of a “beta”, “herb”, or wussy than I probably should have been as LTRs progressed. I became “beta-ized”.
Over time my wife got lazy, fat, and frigid. I can say with certainty ladies that I know her frigidity has nothing to do with a lack of quality sex or “non-sexual affection” from me – I take pride in knowing I treat and fuck her very well and despite her frigidity I know she brags to her friends about it. I put up with her decline without much complaint because I thought it was being supportive and was my duty as a husband. But slowly over time it turned into a monster that I just can’t tolerate anymore and it’s too late to change. I now realize that this is her face-saving passive way to force a divorce.
I have no idea if this would have happened to her if I didn’t slowly allow me to “beta-ize” myself or if I just would’ve split up with her earlier when it first started. I hope this never happens to you guys. I suspect I shaped and spoiled her into the woman she is now rather than her changing of her own accord.
Now I have to figure out whether to go on a giant oat-sowing “fuck fest” to regain my edge or whether I should just go straight back to “courting” which is what I really want to do rather than “playing”. A giant “fuck fest” sure seems fun but perhaps shallow.
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David and JerrDog, the fact that people get older and change somewhat, and many things can reduce someone’s sex drive, is the reason that I believe in polyamory. Being flexible that way is what kept me on friendly terms with both my exes. Even after I felt rejected, I relearned how to love my first husband as a friend and later occasional lover again. When my second husband got older and went 100% fetish, polyamory and realism about how male sexuality works over the years, kept me from freaking out.
My parents, even though they’re Christian and believe in monogamy, admitted that though it’s not something they’d recommend for everyone or as an ideal, it was a good way to “make due” and to be truly loving. Breaking up one’s family should be an absolute last resort.
Usually, women’s problems with polygamy will revolve around time/attention and resources, and social status. Solve these problems and you’re usually fixed.
I like the idea that when we came to a point where we could no longer please each other sexually, that my second husband found someone who could take care of him that way. What she gets from him, I don’t want, and what I get from my boyfriend, he doesn’t want…but everybody gets along because one thing we all want is love and peace with one another.
But there is some aspect of “us against the world”. We and our poly friends are kind of huddled together for warmth in a very cold world. We’ve all had to deal with people incidentally finding out how we live and being confused and sometimes disgusted by it. In a couple of cases, there have been people trying to exploit our friends’ situations.
If it helps though, I’ve noticed that I get entirely different offers when I use the technical “divorced” as opposed to the sentimental situation “open marriage” when partner shopping. I attract better quality applicants by using the latter than the former. So does my ex.
I suppose it’s that preselection thing.
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Yes, this is true, but you didn’t mention the hygiene issue. That’s a big one.
It seems that women often don’t realize how bad they can smell down there. Nothing kills desire like that stench, which can be suffocating.
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JerrDogg, another thing…I’m not sure if she’s passively going for a divorce. “Frigid Woman” is a game straight out of the book. I recommend you read _Games People Play_.
Basically, it’s an advanced version of the _Rapo_ game: seduction and rebuffing. The woman lures you into making an advance, and then tries to make you feel dirty for it, or accuses you of violating her.
Solution: stop playing.
I had an ex boyfriend with a similar problem. His wife didn’t get fat, and is in fact what many here would describe as a 10. I’d put her at a media 8 because she has kind of a big ass and is a fake blonde. They’re Arab, and it was “soft” arranged marriage. Still, she didn’t want to have sex with him at all, but suffered through it enough times to make twin sons. So her sense of duty to him ended right there. She just became a sponsored roomate, except she didn’t want him to get his needs met elsewhere. She also constantly berated him because he was a nice guy who didn’t want to “slap a hoe”.
So, like a man with any balls, he left her. The family pressured him with guilt about his sons to go back, and she promised she’d do better…but she didn’t, and so he left her again.
Then, during that year, he met me.
…
Then the family, staring down the barrel of Black grandkids started to pressure him again, and things got nasty. Because they were cousins, they could actually enforce the threat that they would give her to another man, and he would lose his sons.
So when he came to me to deliver the bad news, I gave him a parting gift a la Blade. No way that hoe was going to take my man and not pay.
I unloaded everything I’d learned about game in marriage in about a five hour crash course.
I explained to him that no woman really enjoys living with a man who is a wuss…and that the way he behaves with me because I let him be the man, is the way he should be with her, but more aggressive because she’s a hoe. You can’t be an equal partner with someone whose mechanisms for attachment are based on greed, exploitation, and cold logic. You have to dominate or be dominated.
So then he starts with the what ifs, and gets around to, “What if she leaves me because I’m mean to her?”
I told him she ain’t goin’ no-damn-where.
So he went back, but things changed dramatically. He keeps her in line very well now. There’s still that special something missing, but now it’s at least a livable situation except for the monogamy enforcement…though by the way he behaves, I’m not so sure she’s enforcing it so well.
Other of his friends have helped in this process. One had been telling him for years what I was saying, but I guess he just needed to hear it from a woman.
The bad news is that lately he’s been back trying to use game on me. Heheheh…maybe I’m in trouble. 😉
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sure, if you beat a dog enough, he soon stops looking at meat as delicious and associates it with pain. Pavlov would be proud of castrating harpies who betasize men.
Yes, some men are sick of fucking their wives; usually its because she only allows him to fuck her in the way she pre-approves and provides the maximum chance of her cumming while giving him the minimum opportunity to be in control. Which means no variety, as he is afraid of offending her.
Or she won’t allow him to ever just shove it in and get it over with, because that’s not romantic.
Or she’s gotten fat and ugly and smells bad.
Or perhaps because she denied him sex so much he started screwing his secretary, so his balls are being drained off.
Men whose wives do any of these things aren’t really fucking their wives; she’s using him as a sexless dildo, just as her feminist overlords have taught her.
If any of these happen to a married guy, when the time comes around for her “wanting it” (oh, and he should be grateful for it!), his chances of popping a boner for this self-centered, castrating shrew of an ugly priss drop off significantly.
Women who let their men act like men get loving, faithful fucks. Women who don’t get alimony.
Kind of shows you exactly what women today truly want.
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Welmer, a woman doesn’t stink if she doesn’t have an infection, and cleans the area well.
Some STD’s cause distinct odors as well. I suggest men familiarize themselves for their own protection.
American women up north are notorious for this. So if you encounter a stinker again, tell her toilet paper isn’t enough, especially if she doesn’t shave.
A woman should wipe front to back, and between the folds once for each surface of toilet paper. Fold, and wipe again.
If it doesn’t come up clear of debris, get more toilet paper and do the same again. Then she should follow up with baby wipes.
Poon should be washed with soap and warm water daily as well, preferably with an antibacterial soap or intimate wash. There are natural options like oblipicha and citrus soaps that are mildly antimicrobial but gentle.
Douching should not be done because it messed up a woman’s natural acid balance. The acid is part of what kills germs down there, and without it one is more vulnerable to infections, and the smell becomes dank and basey.
That basey smell like hot garbage is supposed to kill a man’s sex drive, likely for an evolutionary reason. It means she has an infection and you shouldn’t stick your dick in there.
The reason I know what that smells like is from taking care of old people from the generation of women who douched regularly.
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Bds, that’s so…weird to me.
The times I’m not that much in the mood are the best times for a good rough free-fuck.
Not in the mood just means I don’t feel like going for the O. I still love my man and am excited enough to be with him to auto-lube.
What is wrong with these women???
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No Dave, you’re just more of a punk and a chump, and not because you simply can’t do better, you’re afraid to. The End.
O
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ALL of the above, and more.
Some of them are addicted to targeting married men.
I knew one of them once. She was sick – DSM-IV sick. If your eyes just glazed over, google narcissistic personality and histrionic personality disorder. Really, really scary.
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JerrDog,
At a minimum, you should have flirted with other women, as ch has suggested.
How long were you married? Did you already do a divorce, or is it pending?
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****
And men care nothing about whether the girl is hot or not. They care only about inner beauty, of course. Men want the super-smart, extremely faithful, loyal to a fault girl. Even if she is extremely plain, and doesn’t push his buttons. Except not. Men will forgive quite a lot of transgressions to have a ‘10′ on their arm.
****
It’s a strange fact… but the fact that men are willing to sleep with MORE women, give men the freedom to look for qualities other than sexiness.
Men’s sex drives look for youth, fertility, beauty, and health. With a little bit of faithfullness added. Once those qualitites are reached to a certain point….. ‘one girl is as good as another’. A seven and an eight are pretty much interchangable, and if the seven has something the man wants emotionally/intellectually she will destroy the eight in terms of percieved value for that man. She is an EMT and drives a ambulance sirens blazing, that is like so cool! Even something like that.
Women’s sex drive want the highest status man possible. A seven is IN NO WAY comparable to an eight. And eight is destroyed by a nine, a nine by a ten, and a ten by a ‘celebrity’. Women’s decisions from one man to another are heavily, heavily influenced by status…. unless she has control of her sex drive.
A man can be completely controlled by his sex drive and choose a nine over a ten…. for basically no reason at all.
Men’s sex drives desire for variety in no way changes the primary choice. But it is the desire for variety… not the superiority of the other woman, that leads men to cheat. Normally. And I think we all know men who are faithfull to completely overweight shrews. So even this caveat has it’s limits.
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If more men were capable of giving their women orgasms, women would like sex more. I wonder how many men would want to have sex all the time if the knew they probably wouldn’t have an orgasm?
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“If more men were capable of giving their women orgasms, women would like sex more”
I hate men so much that I am thinking about castrating myself. They must be to busy provoking global warming so they forget their marital duties.
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I must agree w/Anon’s statements above wrt Women’s Orgasms, and the abject failure of so many Men in this regard. Elsewhere in the forum I have discussed this to some extent but I see there needs to be more added. God Willing, I will do so in the future and hope that my Brothers in the Game will join me in the effort.
In the meantime I want to say that Nicole’s recent comments wrt Marriage and Sexless Wives was nothing less than Superlative and stands as an excellent case in point as to what I mean by the Ten Percent Rule. Someone should go thru the siteand colate such sayings by the Women present them to him so that he may put them next to the other items at the top of the site.
O
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Anynonymous:
“If more men were capable of giving their women orgasms, women would like sex more. I wonder how many men would want to have sex all the time if the knew they probably wouldn’t have an orgasm?”
Please. After generations of gay makeover shows, cunnilingus lessons, and jokes about bad husbands not being able to have stamina, not to mention the current effort underway to require ment to have a “six pack” and other pseudo-gay nonsense, if women aren’t orgasming, its something more than effort and technique.
Women don’t have orgasms everytime because your orgasm is not the important thing in sex. Men’s are. So roll over and let him have it wheny our tired, woman, or see him fail to place a ring on your finger while he schtupps your best friend who does put out.
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American women up north are notorious for this. So if you encounter a stinker again, tell her toilet paper isn’t enough, especially if she doesn’t shave.
That caught my interest.
Peter
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That entire conversation sounds completely fabricated.
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it goes without saying, too, that women should first and foremost know how to give THEMSELVES an orgasm. i’ve been with women who won’t talk about masturbation, and have taken such little interest in exploring their own self-love to the point where you’re expected to know more about what feels good for them than they do! wtf?
and maybe they have learned what feels good for them, but they’re so bloody shy about talking about it, and they’ve got these f-d up romantic notions that their ‘perfect lover’ will just instinctively know what works best for them, that everyone walks away dissatisfied in the end. and by everyone, i mean her, ’cause it pretty much always feels good for the guy…
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True story:
I was studying abroad in college in Italy. I needed a travel buddy for a trip a large island off the coast. So I scoured around basically asked everyone until one girl I knew a bit agreed.
Now, this girl was at least a 9. Blond, straight hair, breast implants at 18 (she was 21 at the time) , tan skin, pretty face, hella good legs (my personal favorite). Even got to see her on the beach topless and in a thong. Of course, at the time, I was a fool being faithful to my home gf, but I did enjoy the view.
We got into a discussion about sex, and she kept talking about how she only wanted guys with large dicks. So I asked her if they gave her more or better orgasms.
Her answer was shocking : “I’ve never had an orgasm.”
I nearly fell over. I asked her if she masturbated, and she said no, and then I asked her how she expected guys to know how to do it if she couldn’t do it to herself. She was dumbfounded; she just figured that a real smooth guy would just know.
FYI, she then stated that while she dated guys who were “bad boys” in public, in private they wanted her to take charge in the bedroom. She didn’t like that, but she hadn’t found a guy who would caveman her in private.
Then I asked her a sum up: “If you’ve never had an orgasm, why do you care about dick size?”
She couldn’t answer that. We brainstormed that either it was a cultural thing (“well, lots of girls say they like big dicks, so maybe I’m just going along with that”) or perhaps just a natural thing (“I mean, it means he’s powerful, right?”). But then we remembered that in Ancient Rome (whose history we were learning about while studying abroad), small penises were considered powerful and manly, while large ones were considered barbarian and weak.
Basically, it came from Roman military prowress: short swords are characteristic of an attacking, maruading army, because they can be used in close quarters while rushing forward; long swords are used by defending armies, which are big and bulky and unwieldy for attacking but can keep an enemy at a distance. And Romans, at least until the effiminite end, were conquerors.
So this girl wanted something for no logical reason other than other girls wanted it. And also expected men to make her cum when she couldn’t do it herself.
Looking back, she was the avatar of femininity from my college years.
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Now, this girl was at least a 9. Blond, straight hair, breast implants at 18 (she was 21 at the time) , tan skin, pretty face, hella good legs (my personal favorite).
The breast implant ruined the sweet image. Do most guys really prefer implants over small natural tits? I presonally like ’em small, completely flat, to around C-cup. Once they are no longer small enough to remain pert, they become sexless cow udders to me.
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PA, I do prefer the natural, but its like chocolate or vanilla for me. Both are delicious.
And these were nicely done. She showed me the very tiny scars that I wouldn’t have noticed without her pointing them out. Gave her a nice hourglass figure. I’ve seen and felt bad, but these were darn good.
Yes, I realize now exactly what she was trying to do with all this. No, I didn’t figure it out then, and was too faithful at that point anyway.
In my defense, however, I was young and stupid. And she’d told something along the lines of “well I really want to be a rapper’s girlfriend” and “I only want to date black guys” that completely turned me, a white guy, way off.
Hearing a girl of X race state that they want to only date someone of Y race (i.e. a specific race not their own) is very much a turn off for me; it denotes a racist woman who loathes her own kind and believes only the good stereotypes about her preferred race. Girls like that have huge issues and should be avoided at all costs, even if you’re the beneficiary race.
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Here’s the one thing we’re all forgetting… all women, regardless of sexual appeal have what I like to call a “100-pound limit”. Meaning that for the life of your relationship with them, you’re only going to want to sleep with them on 100 occassions max (give or take a few either way).
Another point worth making… there are no 10’s. Somebody, somewhere is sick of her shit – and you will be too once you get to the 100 pound limit.
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No Dave, you’re just more of a punk and a chump, and not because you simply can’t do better, you’re afraid to.
I’d rather be a punk and a chump than a delusional clone of somebody else who’s stupid to realize that women are only attracted to alphas, and that game is merely a cover for beta. The minute you stop playing game, you’re no better than David Alexander, and at that point, she’ll dump you for a real alpha.
Do most guys really prefer implants over small natural tits?
For me, C cups are tolerable, but you better have something resembling an ass to match. There’s a cute (black) girl at work who dresses very well and has heels and takes great care of herself, but her B cups just make her unattractive to me. In contrast, there’s another (white) girl who is similar, but her C cups are compensated by her ass.
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why does it not surprise me that Dave Alex is an fat ass man? Dude, just come out of the closet and talk about how hot Star Jones was before her surgery.
Beta.
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why does it not surprise me that Dave Alex is an fat ass man?
Even some Oreos like girls with an ass. Liking girls with an ass doesn’t make one a beta. The way I act confers that status.
Dude, just come out of the closet and talk about how hot Star Jones was before her surgery.
Star Jones is kinda weird looking now because her face looks deflated, and she was better slightly better looking before the surgery, but I wouldn’t bang her. One of my family friends was in the similar situation, and I wouldn’t bang the pre-surgery or post-surgery version of her. OTOH, she decided to destroy her family when she realized that her thin body could attract men, and she left her blue-collar husband for smarter, higher ranked (black) men…
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DA:
Please, Dave, you don’t like a nice ass; you like fat girls. Because that’s all you can get because you’re a beta.
Being turned off by a B-cup = you can’t get her, so you’re making up an excuse. She’d turn up her nose the moment you tried to score her digits.
“was better slightly better looking before the surgery”
—that’s like judging a shit sandwitch more appetizing than a pile of dog poo. A distinction without a difference.
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Being turned off by a B-cup = you can’t get her, so you’re making up an excuse.
If she had D-cups I wouldn’t get her either, so that fact doesn’t matter. In contrast, I had a girl with A cups throw herself at me, and I rejected her because of her flat-chested frame.
you like fat girls. Because that’s all you can get because you’re a beta.
Fat girls have done and will continue to be able to find better men than me.
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right, i’m sure some cute little a-breasted chick is pulling a tom jones on you.
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Do most guys really prefer implants over small natural tits? I presonally like ‘em small, completely flat, to around C-cup. Once they are no longer small enough to remain pert, they become sexless cow udders to me.
I’ll take small and natural over large and fake, even though I generally prefer larger ones.
Of course my main preference in women involves something else.
Peter
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That entire conversation sounds completely fabricated.
nope. i’m going by memory, but that was the gist of it.
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I tried the wedding ring ruse one night out on the town, because I thought, no way is this going to work. The hopeless romantic in me was very disappointed. It is definitely not a deterrent.
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M with the dot said:
>To the beta boys: if your wife doesn’t service you, it’s
>because she managed to betaize you or because you
>chose to marry a women with low sex drive. Your fault,
>not hers.
You reveal a great deal of ignorance here.
The sexual drive of women can and often does radically change after child birth from both hormone changes and child birth injury.
Things like improperly healed perineum tears often require being re-cut and re-stitched to correct any distortions from the original tear.
See:
http://www.birthright.co.nz/preg_perineum.html
Other vaginal birth traumas can do things like tear a clit apart.
Those are physical wounds from child birth that take a great deal of time, love and understanding to work through as your partner’s sexual identity has been radically altered in ways she never expected and does not want.
Part of the popularity of surgical C-section child birth is due to medical salesmanship about avoiding those risks to sexual function.
The glossed over down side of surgical C-section child birth is that the mother has a higher chance of dying and lower future fertility if the mother wants more than two children.
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Anonymous
“If more men were capable of giving their women orgasms, women would like sex more. I wonder how many men would want to have sex all the time if the knew they probably wouldn’t have an orgasm?”
While I’m sure there are plenty of men who lack the ability to read their partners, this is a gross oversimplification.
I’ve noticed a common progression in longer term relationships in which a woman who in the beginning is wildly multi-orgasmic, distances herself for whatever reason and her frequency of orgasm diminish dramatically. It is obvious that given the same partners, there is more at play than ability. If anything one’s skill would only increase with time. Before you trot out the “faking it” excuse, several of these women were female ejaculators, providing a very obvious sign of a genuine orgasm.
As they say, the biggest sex organ is the brain. This is particularly true for women. I suspect the changing flux of hormones, and the marked susceptibility of women’s libidos to stress, dissatisfaction, and indeed nearly anything external has more to do with it in many cases. The great regulator that harbors doubts and reservations, the anterior cingulate cortex, must let down it’s guard for us to fully engage in the moment and reduce our inhibitions. This is why consumption of alcohol is such an effective sexual lubricant.
The humdrum nature of daily life and the lack of excitement of as the sheen of a relationship wears of probably reduces her attraction, and increases in stress with the grind of caring for children etc. leads to her not being able to get out of her mind and into the moment.
Louanne Brizendine addresses this in her book “The Female Brain” which if you can get by the annoying feminist tone does contain good information. So ladies, if you have lost your ability to come to completion, stop blaming your husband and take some accountability. Your lack of interest in sex is directly linked to you inability to finish.
If you are one of those who has never had one, it is up to you to learn your own body and guide men in what you need. If you aren’t satisfied the ultimate responsibility lies with you.
Here’s the hormonal basis for the fading of passion in a relationship.
http://alphadominance.com/?p=14
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Experience Father, if my stuff was broken, I wouldn’t punish someone I loved by trying to keep them from finding someone whose stuff isn’t.
Sorry. There are just things a loving wife will do, and things a hoe with a ring would do. Someone who loves you doesn’t want you to suffer.
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Tupac and z, that taken in hand stuff sounds like my parents. They’ve been together 40 years and counting. 🙂
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yeah, i’m with nicole/kthulah here, dude.
i don’t know about you, but my sex drive is relentless. and, as in various freudian metaphors, hydraulic: when enough steam builds up, it’s gonna get let out. somewhere.
if my theoretical wife had this sort of perineal tear, i’d take care of her and make sure she had every comfort during her healing process, as would any other protective alpha husband.
but if she couldn’t fuck for a few weeks, she’d better be ready for my relentless cock up her ass and down her throat on the daily, from the time she wakes up from the anesthesia until the kitty is ready to pounce again. there would only be one alternative, and that would be to grant me absolute license to do whatever i want, with whomever i want, during the recovery period.
what would you do? just sit there and whack it?
that’s not how i roll.
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If there was no way to receive child support from a married man after getting him to impregnate a woman who was not his wife, I think this lack of concern about fucking married men would drop off almost completely. What is there to risk for a woman in this position? So you get knocked up, receive child support, and yet still have complete relationship freedom to be a cum dumpster for any alpha that crosses your path.
This is also obviously good for married men, as it provides a market for their meat outside of their marriage. Married men just need to game the system and not knock up the whore they’re seeing on the side.
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“after a while, I felt like it wasn’t going anywhere.”
God almighty, this is most common and ignorant line womankind has ever uttered.
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Kahn said, “If there was no way to receive child support from a married man after getting him to impregnate a woman who was not his wife, I think this lack of concern about fucking married men would drop off almost completely.”
If that were to happen, then the children born from a married man should automatically go into his custody. That would likely make women even more careful about that kind of thing…if they don’t get money or the child either.
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So you’re a PUA but you have a problem with girls who just want to have fun? Double standard much?
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