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Chateau Heartiste

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Reader Mailbag: American Disintegration Edition

February 4, 2009 by CH

Email #1

Enjoy the blog- you are a philanthropist indeed.

Anyway, a great post would be this- (I am in the midst of a tough decision):

Give up a (low status, enjoyable, kicked back) job, for (top 5 ranked lawschool) after three years of big city penury as a student again.

For various reasons, the road forks exactly at this point in my life. Any general thoughts you have on the role of career/$ vs. everything else in improving game would be welcome.

Good looking, game potential.

And no, I’m not above paying for it (I’m a quality not quantity guy)

Which path through the yellow woods holds the greater bliss?

Anon

The answer to your quandary isn’t as obvious as most people would presume. The typical mediocrity would, of course, tell you to go to law school and slave away, sacrificing the last ounce of your soul for the “prize” of landing a quality woman who will be the perfect wife and mother of your future children. But I look around and see CEOs and captains of industry with frumpy, fat wives, and contrast them with the mangy, dirt poor DJs I see at the local indie hangout boffing cute young chicks. You observe enough of this and you begin to wonder if the conventional wisdom has it wrong.

All else equal, a guy with a high status job and big bucks will clean up better with women than a guy who doesn’t have those things. Rarely is all else equal, though. The biglaw douche will, in time, begin to coast on his career status as substitute for game, eventually attracting the sort of scheming women for whom status and money matters more than anything else. Since I am a man who truly loves the company of women and loves being loved by women, I have no interest in a coldly calculated barter arrangement where I trade my resources for her love. I’ve seen the matrix and know that undefiled love is possible, despite the cultural inertia and constant drumbeat of societal directives to the contrary.

If you want to play the averages, then go to your top 5 law school and game a bunch of cunty lawyer chicks into bed, followed by the unceremonious dumping they so karmically deserve. You will be doing the Lord’s work. But know that you’ll always be looking over your shoulder — at the date trying to tease out your salary, the wife whose pussy dries up when your black AMEX does, the ex-wife whose love for you runs as deep as the best divorce lawyer she could hire — and sinking deeper and deeper into moribund cynicism. At least when you pay for a professional whore, you know she’ll have the integrity to deliver the goods. Bottom line: you will need the best Game at your disposal to avoid this fate.

Email #2

I recently found your blog and think it’s terrific. Your points are right on target, especially concerning the state of women in US coastal cities. The sense of entitlement some of these women have is mind boggling.
I know you’re not a fan of marriage, but what other choice do men have a we get older? The ‘sweet spot’ of women aged 22-27 will become less attainable as we age and therefore the single life will become much less appealing. It will be a sad state of affairs when my only market is women aged 30+ who hold enormous psychological baggage.

And what about loneliness? As friends become married and have kids, the social circle of a single guy becomes smaller. I feel like marriage becomes the only choice, by default. As Chris Rock stated ‘Married and bored, or single and lonely’..

I appreciate your thoughts and advice. Thanks.

R.

Hookers and liquor. That’s how I plan to live out my old age.

If marriage wasn’t such a brutal ass maiming for men; if it wasn’t an institution as currently constituted so intrinsically opposed to men’s interests; if it wasn’t so damnably evil and buried up to the neck in a shitpile of its own making, I’d say go ahead and get married, no worries mate. Just grab yourself a little mistress loving on the sly. No truly good and honorable wife would deny her husband that pleasure. A good wife understands and accepts the reality of the male sex drive.

But we don’t live in that world, so you’d be a fool to get married. You can have all the benefits of marriage in a loving, long term relationship, without any of the negatives.

If, like me, you want to experience the incomparable pleasures of young women’s flesh for as long as possible, you won’t reach that goal through marriage. In fact, getting hitched will only hinder the fullest expression of your manhood, unless you routinely run wedding ring game. Tight game and staying in shape will expand the age disparity within which you can successfully seduce.

Email #3

A bit of fodder for your ongoing hilarious experiment in creative writing:

What’s up with Ashton Kutcher marrying a has been like Demi Moore? On one hand, you have a guy who is tailor made to be an “alpha” who should by rights line up all the hot “poon” he could possibly handle for the next 30 years, at least.

Instead, he marries a once hot-but-now-not has been actress 15 years his senior?  Sure, there’s more to life than screwing an endless line of hot movie starlets (I guess).  Why, however, wouldn’t a guy with his kind of options settle (if he must) for someone younger, hotter, richer, more successful instead of washed-up, w/o kids, etc. etc.?

I just find it odd, and a bit confusing.  Simple Oedipus complex issues or mayhap the alpha vs. beta duality of men isn’t quite as simple and clear cut in all cases?

Anon

For every Ashtun Kutcher there are a hundred Donald Trumps trading in their has-beens for the latest and greatest still-got-its. Don’t get hung up on the glaring exceptions. They exist to give desperate cat ladies a sliver of hope.

Also, we don’t know if boy toy Kutcher is banging sweet young things on the side that Demi conveniently ignores. You’d be surprised the kind of indignities a soon-to-be wall victim cougar like Demi will endure to keep up the delusion that she’s still primo pussy estate to the vast majority of men who matter.

Email #4

You’re a prolific and committed blogger– almost every post shows real insignt and obvious writing skillz.  Why do you put so much energy into this?  don’t get me wrong, I really enjoy reading what you have to say and would be more than a little sad if you stopped writing but I can’t help but wonder what’s in it for you?

~t.

Personal amusement. Oh, and I don’t put much time and energy into this. On average, each post takes me a half hour to an hour to write. I type fast. Since I don’t watch more than an hour of TV per week, I have plenty of free time to indulge my sadistic delights.

Email #5

Hi,
You seem to have really great insight into the male mind (and that of women, as well). I love reading your blog.
I wanted to ask you a question and it’d be great if you could give a bit of advice, no matter how brief as I’m sure you’re busy.
I’m 22 and I’m pretty sure (as bad as this may sound, at least I’m being honest) I’m attracted to intelligent, older men with means.
I am interested in getting married and (sorry to say, it’s true) being taken care of to some degree. I have no fear of committing this young.
I’m finishing my degree soon at a top Ivy League, and would like to pursue a career. I have no shortage of abilities to be successful on my own. But the idea of being a homemaker and mother is equally appealing, albeit an educated homemaker, to a strong, older, and successful man.
What should I do to accomplish this?
I took your dating value test and scored “nascent alpha female.” I get regular attention and looks, I speak French as well as English, and I have modeled, as well. I have been told by many, male and female, that I’m very attractive and well-dressed / put together. I know my being a black female is a drawback. I’m not picky about the man, and I don’t go for looks as much as I do for intellect and ambition… although I am more attracted to white / European men in general.
I’m 5’7”, slim, and I dress well. I have long, straight hair, have been told I have a “perfect” nose and most men compliment me on my legs, lips, and smile.
I’m not afraid of commitment at this age and I am not really interested in men in my age range who seem to only offer sex and / or companionship.
I would like to marry an older guy with means, yes an alpha male in that sense, and I don’t have qualms about his infidelity.
Ultimately I would just like love and stability, as the wife of an accomplished man.
What is your advice?

Thanks,
a regular reader

Were you raised in Eastern Europe by any chance? Foreign girls, particularly East European girls, love the allure of older, sophisticated men. It’ll be my destination before the grim reaper of sexual obsolescence calls my number.

If you are the nascent alpha woman you claim you are, i.e. 8 or higher, then you will have no problem accomplishing your goal. The fact that you’re black pales in relevance to the beauty you bring to the table, so don’t worry that your race will get in the way of you finding and attracting a successful white/European man. Men look first at beauty, then at everything else, and race is down there around “obvious personality defect” in terms of importance. Now there will be some men, especially those for whom family and social status matter immensely, who will balk at marrying a woman of a different race (though they will have no such issues when contemplating you for bang worthiness). Since your window of highest sexual market value is short, it behooves you to filter those types of men so that you don’t waste time on pump and dumpers. Focus on entrepreneurs, business owners, and other similarly situated men. They will be more independent-minded than the suck-up corporate lackeys who infest the law firms and boardrooms. Screen for men whose parents are dead, or who don’t have much extended family. They are less beholden to anyone else’s judgment of their choice in women. You might want to date Scandinavian men, as I’ve heard they are especially enamored of the chocolate love.

One more thing: keep your legs closed for at least three dates. Easy pussy access devalues a woman’s marriageability. Let the man know you are into him through your flirty coyness. Only lower quality women with limited options have to turn to the hard sell to capture a man’s attention. No man, not even the feminist beta males who go by the designation “man”, wants to marry a slut.

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Posted in Reader Mailbag | 151 Comments

151 Responses

  1. on February 4, 2009 at 1:47 pm lace

    here is all you need to know about ashton kutcher:

    LikeLike


  2. on February 4, 2009 at 2:05 pm ironrailsironweights

    I’m 5′7”, slim, and I dress well. I have long, straight hair, have been told I have a “perfect” nose and most men compliment me on my legs, lips, and smile.

    Do you have a GNP?

    Peter

    LikeLike


  3. on February 4, 2009 at 2:07 pm kthulah

    Roissy says, “A good wife understands and accepts the reality of the male sex drive.

    But we don’t live in that world…”

    Nah, *you* don’t live in that world because you’re consistently selecting hoe material, not wife material. None I’ve seen you post about here are even mistress material…but that’s just my opinion.

    It may be difficult for a guy to find a realistic and truly caring wife, but it’s not impossible. You may claim that I think the way I do because I’m old and fat, but I had the same beliefs when I was much younger and a bit scrawny. I used to “hunt” with one of my ex boyfriends. We picked up chicks together.

    My grandfather had a mistress, and my grandmother knew about it. The other woman was no threat to her because she was a strong, level headed, but independent woman who wasn’t running around screwing half the town.

    It’s not just loving one’s husband that makes a woman secure enough to go with that. She has to be a loving, nurturing person in general who takes some pride in her man, and the good things being in a stable family does for him. She has to “want for her sister what she wants for herself”.

    There are plenty of people who are openly polyamorous, and in that are people who are polyamory friendly, who don’t want to have multiple partners themselves, but don’t mind at all being attached to someone who does. There are also those who are circumstantially poly or poly friendly, meaning they would be open to that if it was a matter of illness or a deeper love than thinking some new chick is hot.

    So while for practical purposes, he should probably avoid being trapped in general, if he does want a wife someday, poly friendliness should be a part of his screening process. He might never find one who makes the grade, but at least he won’t miss it if he does.

    LikeLike


  4. on February 4, 2009 at 2:13 pm kthulah

    Lace…that was disturbing.

    Effective, but disturbing.

    LikeLike


  5. on February 4, 2009 at 2:15 pm aquarius chick w/ tat

    roissy,

    Just read the cunty lawyer post via the link, you would like “In the Company of Men.” It does make me wonder if you have referenced “Secretary” anywhere?

    I have always thought marriage to be skewed towards men but my household/family life was that way. My mother did (and still does) everything in the house. Even though she worked and some days late, she still cooked dinner every night (not my father); she reviewed homework (not my father); she washed clothes and cleaned; got us ready for school in the mornings and took us, on and on and on. All my father did was go to work and come home. When I young, he played in two bowling leagues, so he’d come home and go right back out on those nights. It didn’t matter what my mother needed to do, she always had to work around him. And I was taught that marriage is forever and in my family the only divorces were due to abuse or long-term, recurring cheating. There is no such thing as falling out of love and trying again. Marriage is a committment/covenant promise between you, your spouse and God.

    But I’d agree that divorce favors women.

    LikeLike


  6. on February 4, 2009 at 2:35 pm The G Manifesto

    “Give up a (low status, enjoyable, kicked back) job, for (top 5 ranked lawschool and BigLaw $) after three years of big city penury as a student again.”

    Horrible choices.

    I choose “C”.

    Be a G (lots of CASH and relaxation and you get to wear double flash custom Savile Row Suits. Pleny of vacation and travel as well).

    – MPM

    LikeLike


  7. on February 4, 2009 at 2:53 pm Chuck

    “Instead, he marries a once hot-but-now-not has been actress 15 years his senior?”

    I wouldn’t say Demi Moore is a has-been in the looks department. I’m not sure what her GNP looks like in the light of day, but I’m hoping its not dried up and crusted over like a scorched mud lake. She’s still hotter than a good number of young Hollywood actresses.

    That being said, Moore has also enlisted the use of the great female equalizer to Game, plastic surgery and personal trainers, to greater extent than most. To me, she looks better now than she did 20 years ago.

    LikeLike


  8. on February 4, 2009 at 2:54 pm Bhetti B

    Old school Mormons and Islam agrees with polygamy…

    LikeLike


  9. on February 4, 2009 at 3:01 pm kthuhlah is weak

    lol why everytime i get on this website, on of my favorites, i gotta see this lady’s picture and know she is being backassed and annoying????

    wtf???

    LikeLike


  10. on February 4, 2009 at 3:03 pm Firepower

    email #1:
    If truly a “quality over quantity” guy – you already made your decision. F law school. Enjoy life.

    DJ’s fall out of style and all grow old, so young poon flocks to the next big thing. Skip the workouts and pay for it until your testosterone level plummets and you no longer care. It’s cheaper and wastes less time.

    #5
    Report to me for an emotionally abusive 3-year semi-monogamous (on my part) ‘romantic luv’ relationship until your looks fade, or I grow tired of you. The education I will provide gratis for your services.

    LikeLike


  11. on February 4, 2009 at 3:18 pm sara I

    One more thing: keep your legs closed for at least three dates.

    Three dates? How about three months worth of dates? 3rd or 4th date sex is just as bad as 1st date sex. She won’t know diddly squat about the man except maybe his earning potential and even that could be a sham. Get a grip, roissy. Women would be wise to wait till she can observe him in many situations. Getting sexually attached is a real bad idea for a woman unless she knows clearly and trusts the man she is with. If you were a woman you’d understand, but you’re not so you don’t but you think you do.

    LikeLike


  12. on February 4, 2009 at 3:20 pm curious

    great post –

    for #1. as someone who’s forayed into big law (working as a corporate paralegal) its an awful idea if you think it’ll faciliate pussy getting.

    You’ll (the attorneys) work 70 hours a week, eat at your desk (and develop the desk ass this sendentary lifestyle leads to), and be surrounded by nerds and have absolute assholes in charge.

    What about that sounds like it enhances your chances at gaming a lot of chicks?

    LikeLike


  13. on February 4, 2009 at 3:30 pm z.g.

    lace

    here is all you need to know about ashton kutcher:


    Point 2.50

    “I pledge to sell a culture of intelligence except of ignorance”

    Yoooooo, dimwits….

    In that I pledge commercial, where you pledge to nothing but “we are oh so humanitarian” fashion,

    How many scientists are there?
    How many engineers are there?
    How many doctors, nurses, paramedics?
    How many policemen, firefighters, soldiers?
    How many teachers, volunteers?
    How many craftsmen?

    How many people are there who are actually doing something worthwhile?

    Intelligence my ass.

    The whole commercial is a fashion, botox and silicone show, and gets to tell you that the common human values nothing but ignorance.

    Intelligence…….????

    Just got pissed at that useless piece of crap of advertisement, showing worthless faces telling me I should not drink bottled water.

    I’ll drink bottled piss, if I want to.

    (And, “All about Mary” looks like shit.

    Money cant buy youth.)

    Anybody there who is pledging has done something…. Something worthwhile?

    (Maybe the musician and the two basketballers….)

    I pledge… #¤#&¤%/%#”#¤%”¤&#/&¤%/¤%&(/&%….

    LikeLike


  14. on February 4, 2009 at 3:38 pm p

    #1 — Go to law school if you’re interested in the experience. Dump the Big Law and Big $ notions of it. I went to Top 5 school because I wanted the experience. Afterwards, I declined every job offer and started my own company.
    #2 — The world is big place. You’re a man. You’ll always be able to get ass. If you doubt this, move to South America and enjoy life.
    #3 — Ashton is wired differently. I can’t understand it, but I”m not required to. Each to his own.
    #4 — Roissy’s in it for … whatever he’s in it for. Who cares?
    #5 — Start hanging out at Hospitals. Way health care is going, hospital administrators are going to be the only ones left standing with money. Second, volunteer at local University Club or something. Should catch yourelf a big fish.

    LikeLike


  15. on February 4, 2009 at 4:24 pm maria

    I don’t buy this “I won’t marry” BS, roissito. sorry.

    “Hookers and liquor. That’s how I plan to live out my old age.”

    pretty lie detected. be honest, deep down you know you’ll settle.

    LikeLike


  16. on February 4, 2009 at 4:29 pm Chuck

    “Three dates? How about three months worth of dates? 3rd or 4th date sex is just as bad as 1st date sex. She won’t know diddly squat about the man except maybe his earning potential and even that could be a sham.”

    Well she won’t truly know the man until she’s lived with him for about 2 years so why not wait until then?

    A man can handle a woman who doesn’t give it up on the first date; as a matter of fact it’s necessary if there is to be any LT prospects. At the same time, as men with options, she has to strike while our iron’s hot and make with the sexy time at a reasonable pace.
    3rd or 4th date sex seems to be a reasonable progression for a man to maintain both interest and respect for a woman.

    LikeLike


  17. on February 4, 2009 at 4:40 pm Maria

    DO NOT move to south america.
    We don’t have anything to do with it.

    LikeLike


  18. on February 4, 2009 at 4:44 pm db

    #5 sounds a lot like chic 🙂 two suggestions re places to meet these guys: bars at luxury hotels right after work and the driving range on weekends. who cares if you can’t golf – it actually encourages them to strike up a conversation with you if they feel they can offer advice to help you out.

    LikeLike


  19. on February 4, 2009 at 4:44 pm Tall Man

    kthuhlah is weak: “lol why everytime i get on this website, on of my favorites, i gotta see this lady’s picture and know she is being backassed and annoying????

    wtf???”

    Couldnt agree more… the picture, tone, the long, annoying and uninteresting posts… nauseating

    LikeLike


  20. on February 4, 2009 at 4:48 pm lurker

    The only female worth marrying is a religious girl who rejects feminism. She’s a virgin, she”ll never cheat, she’ll never divorce you if you do cheat, she’ll put out whenever you tell her to to please her man, she’ll cook, she’ll clean, and she’ll take care of the kids.

    Every other woman is just a lying little whore.

    LikeLike


  21. on February 4, 2009 at 4:54 pm lurker

    Ashton was the 5th banana on a 3rd rate sitcom. his claim to fame was he was a tiger beat pin-up, which he parlayed into some very crappy TV production credits (“punk’ed”=lame, “Beauty and the geek”=beta reinforcing trash).

    Ashton’s lucky he hooked up with an over-the-hill sugar momma to secure his finances and a modicum of fame when his teen idol phase went south and no man would ever see his movies or shows.

    Ashton’s a total beta who got famous because of his looks; witness Demi Moore complainign on national TV (to Letterman!) that Ashton was too “fast” in bed.

    Imagine that happening to an alpha like Bruce Willis, her first husband. Can’t, can you? Willis wouldn’t stand for that crap, and dumped her for hot young poon. Ashton the beta said, “yes, dear” and wore her favorite banana-colored thong that evening while bending over and taking her dildo while being forced to watch “G.I. Jane.”

    LikeLike


  22. on February 4, 2009 at 4:57 pm Bhetti B

    On lawyers: http://www.telegraph.co.uk/news/newstopics/howaboutthat/4424127/Sexpat-lawyer-who-published-online-erotic-novel-sacked-from-City-firm.html

    I just don’t know where to start there.

    On Alphaness, Ashton Kutchers and Beta phenomena: http://www.sciencedaily.com/releases/2009/02/090202174958.htm

    Apparently, the first rule of science is: does it apply to chimps?

    LikeLike


  23. on February 4, 2009 at 5:09 pm kthulah

    Tall man and whoever the sockpuppet is, you know, for guys who don’t like fat chicks, you sure seem to love riding my ass alot.

    Latch off.

    :: starts a collection for lurker’s emigration to Yemen ::

    I would want to send you to Saudi Arabia, but those guys go to Egypt to temporarily marry hoes for vacations. Oman? They import theirs in the form of “domestic helpers”.

    If you convert to (Sunni) Islam, you can go to Yemen, buy a nice girl, and she’ll do all that *and* tend your cattle. Total win. 🙂

    You may think I’m being sarcastic, but I believe that if a man isn’t happy where he is, he should go elsewhere. Like Nietzsche says, don’t look to the land of your fathers. Look to the land of your sons.

    LikeLike


  24. on February 4, 2009 at 5:16 pm Tood

    ‘Hookers and liquor. That’s how I plan to live out my old age.’

    This is the one gaping miss in all of Roissy’s writings on this blog. I agree with almost everything else he writes, except this.

    Almost ALL people, men and women, want children of their own. That current marriage laws make this dangerous for men is a tragedy, and shows that America is no longer a ‘land of opportunity’. Social conservatives are a total failure for pursuing distractions like gay marriage and stem cells and NOT attacking this mortal threat to family formation.

    But when Roissy is 55, he WILL regret not having a son to teach Game to. That is natural for any healthy male.

    This subject is conspicuously absent from all of Roissy’s writings.

    LikeLike


  25. on February 4, 2009 at 5:19 pm GNPs are for Apes

    Peter has latent bestial proclivities.

    He actually wants the womans buttocks to be covered with fur too. Eeeeewwwwww!!!!

    LikeLike


  26. on February 4, 2009 at 5:19 pm Tood

    “Like Nietzsche says, don’t look to the land of your fathers. Look to the land of your sons.”

    Great sentence. Unfortunately, it is too risky for a man to have children in America. It really is.

    LikeLike


  27. on February 4, 2009 at 5:32 pm gig

    For the americans i the forum:

    can’t you protect your assets by putting they all in the name of your mother/father? I’ve seen it done in Brazil. The guy owned a firm, but put it in the name of his parents, so in the end the cheating whore he married got almost nothing in the divorce, since his parents “paid” him a small wage.

    LikeLike


  28. on February 4, 2009 at 5:43 pm Comment Ninja

    “Women would be wise to wait till she can observe him in many situations. Getting sexually attached is a real bad idea for a woman unless she knows clearly and trusts the man she is with.”

    But this presumes that the woman is screening for a provider – something most women only begin to do after the onset of aging and sagging boobs have set in (or after they’ve become single mothers and want to find a new daddy for their kids). If the woman already has a provider, nothing precludes her from whoring it up on the side and having a provider-beta pay for her slutty lifestyle – which is precisely what she’s likely to do.

    Why would an alpha with options ever commit to such a past-her-prime woman? It would be like dating a retardedly illogical and over-emotional man and supporting his kids.

    “If you were a woman you’d understand, but you’re not so you don’t but you think you do.”

    Perhaps, but understanding what it’s like to be a woman is completely irrelevant to having success with bedding them. The first lesson every budding PUA learns is to ignore what women say they want or think and simply focus on what they actually respond to.

    But there’s a larger point here, and that’s this: if you look outward and let others define ‘success’ for you, they’ll always do it in self-serving ways. For instance, if you let women define what a successful man is, they’ll define it in ways that serve their own interests i.e., be a big strong man who protects her and never cheats. But why let others define success for you? Simply figure out what you want and go out and get it.

    LikeLike


  29. on February 4, 2009 at 5:55 pm Comment_Lawyer

    Letter Number 1:
    Roissy is showing his inexperience in how Big Law works here.

    Letter Writer One, you, if you value your life, should read the first three articles. Read them entirely. It is important.

    Here is another thing the potentional Law Student should include in his list of difficulties that will result from law school:
    1.When you ‘graduate’, you will ‘graduate’ into indentured servitude as an Associate:

    http://www.slate.com/id/2073302/
    2,420 billable hours per year to get a bonus.

    The number is real. Repeating, the number of hours is real.

    But don’t worry, Big Boss is feeling your pain.
    http://www.whataboutclients.com/archives/2008/08/should_associat.html

    I’m sorry, Big Boss knows you are a worthless animal that deserves to die.

    Or you can become a prostitute to pay off your debts!

    http://findarticles.com/p/articles/mi_qn4176/is_20040924/ai_n14585864

    I could go on, but if you aren’t scared into taking the right course now, you need your head examined!

    There are other problems, big problems, problems big enough that I’d spit at the suggestion just because of them.

    But do you really need me to go on?

    It won’t be three years, or four years, till you get to a place that doesn’t suck. It will be eight years, or ten years, even without the other little problems that I’m going to leave alone right now.

    LikeLike


  30. on February 4, 2009 at 5:59 pm Patrick Bateman

    I like to think that I’m not easily influenced, but Roissy’s anti-marriage writings may have made it easier for me to dump my ex. Now I just need to find a way of fathering and raising a few kids without being legally obligated to support a woman.

    LikeLike


  31. on February 4, 2009 at 6:17 pm Racer X

    db

    That is an awfully alluring pic of you. I am having many impure fantasies about you because of it. Your hot.

    LikeLike


  32. on February 4, 2009 at 6:23 pm Chuck

    “Imagine that happening to an alpha like Bruce Willis, her first husband. Can’t, can you? Willis wouldn’t stand for that crap, and dumped her for hot young poon.”

    This brings up a good point. It’s been interesting that Moore/Kutcher have such a good relationship with Bruce Willis after their separation. Most guys in Willis’ position would be completely distraught and hurt by this situation i.e. Hulk Hogan, but Willis knows that he outranks Kutcher on the Hollywood alpha list. He also might believe that he could get back with Demi Moore if he wanted.

    I have a similar situation w/ an ex-girlfriend who I dated for 5 years. Although I’m not alpha of all alphas or anything, I’m moreso than her current boyfriend, and I’m not bothered by their dating at all. If she dated someone I felt was higher than me on the hierarchy I would possibly feel jealous or something. I guess my feeling is similar to what Bruce Willis might feel; if I really wanted to get back with the ex- I/he could probably do it.

    LikeLike


  33. on February 4, 2009 at 6:30 pm kthulah

    Ninja says, “But there’s a larger point here, and that’s this: if you look outward and let others define ’success’ for you, they’ll always do it in self-serving ways.”

    This is equally applicable when you ask why an alpha with options would commit to a woman “past her prime”.

    What if her “past her prime” is better than most women in their prime?

    Alpha type people are a very small percentage of humanity. Why they do what they do is less important than whether or not what they’re doing works for them.

    They’re not worried about what would make you happy when they make decisions about their life. That’s part of what makes them alpha. Learn from this.

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  34. on February 4, 2009 at 6:54 pm Comment Ninja

    kthulah: You either missed my point, or deliberately blinded yourself to my meaning.

    Unlike other people here who seem to genuinely detest you, I find the frequency of your posts here kind of morbidly fascinating because it makes no sense.

    An analogy: It’s like if I were a penniless hobo who repeatedly visited a website advising gold-diggers on how to score rich dudes and then waxing philosophically on how they’re all misguided and needed to grow up. The gold-diggers aren’t there to read my opinions on life. They’re there to learn how to become better gold-diggers. Learn from that.

    P.S. Nietzsche would not have supported many of your arguments.

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  35. on February 4, 2009 at 6:58 pm Dave from Hawaii

    With regards to Bruce Willis…true story: I’m friends with the sister of an actress that had a role in one of Willis’ more recent movies. (Went to high school with her, still hang out with her and her husband). She went to the movie premiere with her sister and met and talked to Willis at the party…and talked with her sister about him.

    He’s a pretty miserable guy, is bitter about the divorce – very nice to work with, very professional, but is obviously not in a good place with regards to his ex-wife and their children. He maintains a forced, good relationship with Demi, otherwise he wouldn’t be able to have any kind of relationship with his kids.

    Demi’s got him over the barrel because of the current family court/child custody extortion racket of the divorce courts. Demi’s no different from all the other typical American WhoreSkanks that use their ex-husband’s children to extort him.

    Don’t believe everything you see, read or hear about celebrities in Hollywood Babylon.

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  36. on February 4, 2009 at 6:59 pm chic noir

    Donald Trump’s wife is between 38-40 years of age.

    Since I am a man who truly loves the company of women and loves being loved by women
    *DEAD FAINT*

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  37. on February 4, 2009 at 7:06 pm kthulah

    Ninja, your point in saying that was obviously that you think no alpha with options would or should commit to a woman past her prime, implying that someone who would do so could not be alpha.

    Am I wrong about that?

    …and as far as Nietzsche not supporting my arguments, well…I admire him, but it is not my aim in life to emulate him. I hope to surpass him in many ways.

    I think that is what he would have wanted of the readers and admirers who could understand his works, though that isn’t my reason for living as I do.

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  38. on February 4, 2009 at 8:02 pm David Alexander

    But when Roissy is 55, he WILL regret not having a son to teach Game to. That is natural for any healthy male.

    Doesn’t Roissy have a nephew to teach game to?

    LikeLike


  39. on February 4, 2009 at 8:03 pm Michael Blowhard

    A propos of one of this blog’s themes:

    Lawyer gals!

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  40. on February 4, 2009 at 8:15 pm Lupo

    Comment_ninja wrote: “Unlike other people here who seem to genuinely detest you, I find the frequency of your posts here kind of morbidly fascinating because it makes no sense.”

    Simple: when you’re so far gone on the status hierarchy that the only attention you can get is negative attention, you take what you can get. Being flamed here by her betters is the only sort of attention someone like that can obtain. I suspect she’s also so abysmally stupid, she harbors delusions that she might siphon off some of Roissy’s traffic to feed the google-ads all over her lame website. But really, she’d simply be devoid of male attention otherwise.

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  41. on February 4, 2009 at 8:17 pm Chuck

    “…and as far as Nietzsche not supporting my arguments, well…I admire him, but it is not my aim in life to emulate him. I hope to surpass him in many ways.”

    How do you plan on surpassing Nietzsche? just curious

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  42. on February 4, 2009 at 8:39 pm Bangs and a Bun

    There’s no way that last letter was real.

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  43. on February 4, 2009 at 8:42 pm roissy

    chiclet reenacts the sound of desperation:
    Donald Trump’s wife is between 38-40 years of age.

    melanie knauss is a slovenian supermodel who is 24 years younger than the donald. melanie is also 7 years younger than marla, trump’s last wife, and 21 years younger than ivana, trump’s first wife.
    thank you for proving my point.

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  44. on February 4, 2009 at 8:48 pm kthulah

    Livejournal-Lupo, when you speak *of* my betters, please bear in mind that you certainly can’t speak *for* them.

    …and as far as my being unable to get positive male attention, well…whatever keeps you warm at night.

    I think you’re just miffed that you can’t even get a “fat cunt” to like you.

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  45. on February 4, 2009 at 8:51 pm kthulah

    Chuck, please don’t pretend that you want to get to know me. It’s much easier if you just continue the game of Simon says call Nicole names like an honest tool.

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  46. on February 4, 2009 at 9:04 pm Anonymous

    So the Trump’s wife is almost 40. Hmmm, I would have thought, given his resources, that he would only be dealing with the early-to-mid 20s crowd. I guess one does age out of the market, sooner or later, if one wants a quality woman.

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  47. on February 4, 2009 at 9:11 pm David Alexander

    melanie knauss is a slovenian supermodel who is 24 years younger than the donald.

    Coincidentally, she’s a year younger than his oldest son, Donald Trump Jr. What’s the chance of Melania indulging in Junior?

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  48. on February 4, 2009 at 9:23 pm Gak Flower

    Know who pops into my head first when I think, ‘Alpha’? The Christopher Plummer character in Syriana.

    LikeLike


  49. on February 4, 2009 at 9:30 pm Daniel

    I’m with “kthulah is weak.”

    I look forward to reading this blog every week day. It’s a bright spot on the waste of the internet. Reading the comments is part of the fun, even if they are sometimes retarded.

    But lately it’s become such a chore. Kthulah’s like a blight on this land. What an insecure fraud and tiresome bore.

    Doesn’t it have it’s own blog where it can bleat?

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  50. on February 4, 2009 at 9:30 pm Reader Mailbag: American Disintegration Edition | No Brainer Profits

    […] Read the rest here: Reader Mailbag: American Disintegration Edition […]

    LikeLike


  51. on February 4, 2009 at 9:43 pm kthulah

    Daniel-sockpuppet-of-jewbashing-anonyme, it’s funny that you would use the term “bleat” while you’re doing what Simon says.

    Do you feel that I’m treating you or anyone else here unfairly?

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  52. on February 4, 2009 at 9:50 pm Daniel

    ???

    Whoa, you are going nutso now.

    I’m not anyone but Daniel, toots. I comment maybe once or twice a week.

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  53. on February 4, 2009 at 9:56 pm kthulah

    Irrelevant and unverifiable.

    Answer the question.

    Do you feel that I am treating you or anyone else here unfairly?

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  54. on February 4, 2009 at 10:22 pm Sparks123

    I guess the Donald respects the “Half your age plus seven” rule.

    Relating to the first question, what’s the ideal job for a guy trying to up his game? I’m thinking about working at a bar as a transition job.

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  55. on February 4, 2009 at 10:25 pm AB

    Regarding #2 question:
    Getting married is completely a personal decision, and if you don’t want to marry, more power to you. But saying marriage is bad for you is just wrong: married people are significantly wealthier, healthier, have better sex, and happier (Just look up any social science research on marriage). This is true for both men and women, and the benefits are really large. For example, marrying gives the same health benefits to a man as quitting smoking (about 7 years added to your life). And no, living together or dating do not have the same benefits.

    And divorce is not as financially devastating for men as you state (although of course there are exceptions). Studies of the financial effects of divorce show most men enjoy a considerable rise in their standard of living (42% up according to one study, while women had a 73% drop). This effect is even more true when children are involved, since most women keep custody and children are expensive.

    Since this is the place where pretty lies perish, I think it’s better to base arguments on facts.

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  56. on February 4, 2009 at 10:35 pm kthulah

    AB, I have to wonder about the truth of such statistics.

    Here in Israel, many people cohabitate and don’t marry officially because they can’t. Also, many if not most Christian Arabs never marry officially. They get betrothed, and then after awhile are legally recognized as cohabitants, and recognized as married by the community. Nothing ever goes on paper.

    So this is one of those things I have trouble believing. In the U.S. living together is even more acceptable than it is here.

    In the statistics, they’re likely talking about the proportion of marriages that actually last a lifetime. Getting married certainly hasn’t extended the life of any men who’ve been divorced.

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  57. on February 4, 2009 at 10:53 pm obvious

    “But I look around and see CEOs and captains of industry with frumpy, fat wives, and contrast them with the mangy, dirt poor DJs I see at the local indie hangout boffing cute young chicks.”

    Yeah, the mangy dirt poor DJs are boffing cute (drunk) young chicks because they are able to in their 20s…they can do it until they get in to their thirties at which point they become just another poor old sap with no prospects who few women are interested in.

    But at least the CEO/lawyer/businessman has a plan that extends past age 35 unlike the DJs.

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  58. on February 4, 2009 at 11:12 pm Jack

    Why aren’t there any white women posting here anymore?

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  59. on February 4, 2009 at 11:15 pm Thor

    AB is right about marriage…research does show a lot of benefits. And for a lot of men thinking long term, those benefits eventually become more important than chasing ass. In time, most guys find a woman they want to settle down with. The advantage of learning about female psychology (call it game, if you wish) is that it gives you more options, and a better chance of selecting the right long-term partner. If you do believe that marriage is a serious, long-term (yes, even lifelong) commitment, the important thing is to choose well. Two more things: 1)absolutely, absolutely get a prenup, no matter how much money you have or expect to have; 2) think very, very seriously about whether you want children, and if you don’t, make sure no accidents happen when her biological clock is making her crazy.

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  60. on February 4, 2009 at 11:24 pm The G Manifesto

    “For example, marrying gives the same health benefits to a man as quitting smoking (about 7 years added to your life).”

    Not much of a bonus.

    Keep in mind, its the LAST 7 years….

    – MPM

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  61. on February 4, 2009 at 11:26 pm The G Manifesto

    “If your wife doesn’t like the aroma of your cigar, change your wife.”

    Zino Davidoff

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  62. on February 4, 2009 at 11:34 pm whiskey

    AB — the problem is that in surveying the benefits of marriage, the surveys don’t take into consideration the profound time-orientation shift of women (and to be fair, men).

    An example is the famous survey showing that most millionaires married early, stayed married, and married supportive, faithful women who played a key part in nurturing their husband’s successes. Buffett and guys like him are cited.

    Problem: that describes the men who married in 1955. It ain’t 1955 now.

    Thor is quite right, selection is the key and the big problem is that most women are short-term oriented, what will the guy do for me TODAY and tomorrow? Almost none will be supportive and be willing to endure frugal times to build up earnings and so on, which is typical for most professionals as well as entrepreneurs.

    The companionship and support of traditional marriage is gone because the women who traditionally got marriage are gone, shifted towards a pursuit of the Alphas, the players, then bitterness and lack of ability to attach in their thirties. This is probably why few marriages last, and most wives are not very supportive.

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  63. on February 4, 2009 at 11:43 pm Thor

    Whiskey,

    I think there are still a lot of women who have long-term horizons, understand the ups and downs of life, and are willing to put effort into the relationship. But they are harder to find. It’s best to find a woman who comes from a stable family (Mom and Dad are still together, or stayed together for decades). If you can handle the added complications of foreign women (and there are many complications), you can do quite well if you find one from a conservative culture. Personally, I have fond feelings for, and good experience with, Latin American women.

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  64. on February 4, 2009 at 11:55 pm Tood

    ABs stats are extremely flawed, and quite ignorant.

    1) Men who are wealtheir would have gotten wealthy anyway. without marriage. Corelation is not causation.

    2) It is absolute BULL that women lose money in divorce and men make money. That is a page straight out of the feminist lie-manual. The woman suffers no financial loss for divorcing a dutiful husband on a mere whim, while he has to pay her alimony for ever.

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  65. on February 4, 2009 at 11:57 pm Tood

    “Donald Trump’s wife is between 38-40 years of age.”

    She was a 10 even at age 36. She probably still is, though I haven’t checked her out lately.

    So she is an outlier for sure.

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  66. on February 4, 2009 at 11:58 pm Tood

    “Doesn’t Roissy have a nephew to teach game to?”

    Sure. But a nephew is not a son.

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  67. on February 4, 2009 at 11:58 pm Anonymous

    But at least the CEO/lawyer/businessman has a plan that extends past age 35 unlike the DJs.

    still not the same. what the dj experiences in that short window surpasses what that ceo/lawyer/businessman experiences from 35 to death. plus, it sounds good in theory but most ceo/lawyer/businessman in actuality settle down for an overeducated bore of a waspy ivy league patrician wife way too early before their careers take off and end up with a mistress and a miserable marriage and an expensive divorce. plus with their time constraints from working all the time they never get the time to ever really swim in a sea of poon.

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  68. on February 5, 2009 at 12:05 am Zarathustra

    In re. “the health benefits of marriage” argument:

    Indubitably, people who drive luxury cars to work are substantially healthier, richer, and probably happier than those who ride bicycles or walk to work, so perhaps the lesson we should extract from this factoid is that physical activity is rather harmful to our health and also we should all drive as much as possible, right?

    On a serious note, the reason marrieds demonstrate across the board superior empirical statistics on their well being is not because marriage has some magical power that makes you live longer but instead it is due to the fact that the more responsible, wealthier segment of the population is more likely to marry than the less fastidious people proles at the bottom. It’s a meaningless statistical artifact, nothing more.

    NB: I suspect that if income, race, age, intelligence, education, et alia were corrected for in these studies then this “benefit” of marriage would evaporate almost completely.

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  69. on February 5, 2009 at 12:06 am Zarathustra

    “…the less fastidious proles at the bottom…”

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  70. on February 5, 2009 at 12:06 am Tood

    “still not the same. what the dj experiences in that short window surpasses what that ceo/lawyer/businessman experiences from 35 to death. ”

    The best plan for a single man is :

    1) Be an engineer, MBA, or lawyer by day, but make sure the hours aren’t too extreme (less than 55/week).

    2) Moonlight as a DJ, bartender, fashion photographer, massage therapist, yoga instructor, dance instructor, french chef, or band member in your off hours. Whatever suits your talents/hobby interests. 15-20 hours a week, which is a breeze if this is your hobby anyway. The trick is to choose something from the list above, rather than get sucked into World of Warcraft or watching sports.

    3) Become moderately competent in GAME.

    Then, your life is fully balanced. You will have financial stability as well as an abundance of women.

    I wish someone had given me this advice when I was 22.

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  71. on February 5, 2009 at 12:38 am Thursday

    Donald Trump’s wife is between 38-40 years of age.

    But they started dating when she was 29.

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  72. on February 5, 2009 at 1:24 am i smile 2 much

    You already know how much I enjoy your blog. I’ve told you that before a few times.

    “One more thing: keep your legs closed for at least three dates. Easy pussy access devalues a woman’s marriageability.”

    Another good rule.

    Though I admit I generally encourage females 4 or 5 times before they get down to the (yummy enjoyable!) devaluable stuff 🙂

    *smiles*

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  73. on February 5, 2009 at 2:44 am expats get the hotties

    Lurker:

    Every other woman is just a lying little whore.

    Every woman is a lying little whore. The one you described is merely a trained lying little whore. A tiger is aways a wild animal.

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  74. on February 5, 2009 at 2:49 am expats get the hotties

    Oh, man, what happened to my ?

    Anyway, Lurker, I’m of the soul of a woman was created below school. Women are prone to socialization, but they are stil women – no guarantee of a smooth ride, based on her religion or upbringing. All women shit test, for example. Most are prone to leaving you if they lose interest, or find better interests.

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  75. on February 5, 2009 at 3:01 am expats get the hotties

    Todd

    Almost ALL people, men and women, want children of their own.

    I think that’s an over-estimation, Todd. Most women, probably. Most, but not almost all.

    I don’t want kids. Never have. Never understood why any would. Kids are a pain, and I know from experience.

    I know it’s hard to imagine someone not having a feeling that you strongly have. Think of it in terms of horses. Some people are horse people – they are gaga over their horses, life would much poorer without them, and they’d do anything for their horses. Other people simply are not horse people.

    I’m not a baby or kid person. I’d rather rent them by playing uncle than owning by playing Dad.

    And I’m glad that alcohol and whores are an option for my old age.

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  76. on February 5, 2009 at 3:10 am expats get the hotties

    Zarathusta:

    NB: I suspect that if income, race, age, intelligence, education, et alia were corrected for in these studies then this “benefit” of marriage would evaporate almost completely.

    From what I recall, self reported leves of life satisfaction are about equal amongst both married people, and people with an extended network of friends. It’s being lonely that sucks.

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  77. on February 5, 2009 at 3:29 am AB

    Ktulah: there’s been a lot of research done on US cohabiting couples vs. married couples (I don’t know what the situation is in Israel), and cohabiting does not give the benefits that marriage does. Actually a cohabiting women and children are the highest-risk group for abuse.

    Whiskey: you are right that society has changed. The research includes all married couples though, not just ones who married in 1955. Also, it’s not really true “few” marriages last: if your parents are still married, you are white or Asian and middle class, and you married after 25, your chances of divorce are really pretty low (maybe 10%).

    Tood: actually, the marriage benefits remain even after controlling for wealth prior to marrying, etc. As far as wealth goes, of course the combined income of 2 people (or more rarely 1 income + 1 person’s labor at home) is going to be higher. Married men also receive more promotions and raises at work (starting after they marry) so they make more over time.

    As far as divorce goes, it’s true that women become poorer after divorce (after all, most men earn more than their wives). If you don’t believe me, just type in financial effects of divorce on google. Divorced women have a much higher poverty rate (and most women don’t receive alimony).

    Zarathustra: It’s true the more functional people marry. But when they do control for income, race, age, etc. the benefits of marriage remain (marrying is especially good for black people). As far as health goes, men with health problems are more likely to marry: but they still live longer!

    I don’t mean to say that everybody should get married, just that labeling marriage as a “brutal ass maiming” is incorrect. Your situation will vary, but on average, both men and women are better off married than not (and there is some evidence men benefit more than women).

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  78. on February 5, 2009 at 3:43 am el chief

    wow, this guy caught on 14 years late…http://www.sciencedaily.com/releases/2009/02/090204121515.htm

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  79. on February 5, 2009 at 4:16 am Jack

    If women were getting hurt so much by divorce, they wouldn’t be filing the vast majority of them.

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  80. on February 5, 2009 at 7:27 am gig

    Keep in mind, its the LAST 7 years….

    Quote of the month, G.

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  81. on February 5, 2009 at 9:12 am Man1

    Re: Most men want children of their own.

    Not so sure about this one. Is “I want kids” the reason every time you fuck? There’s a built-in tendency for men to fuck, not necessarily a tendency to want children (ask any teenage male). One can end up having a bunch of kids while having little conscious desire of having them, especially in the days before contraception (which is a relatively new thing). Children are more of less a by-product, a side effect, of male sexuality.

    Since wanting children has not been a necessary trait for men to survive and propagate their genes (they’d end up having children anyway as long as the sex drive was there), it is not far-fetched to suggest that many men today really don’t necessarily want children of their own.

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  82. on February 5, 2009 at 9:22 am Anonymous

    If women were getting hurt so much by divorce, they wouldn’t be filing the vast majority of them.

    http://www.slate.com/id/94243/

    Why Men Pay To Stay Married,
    and women pay to get divorced.

    Moreover, there’s a good reason, rooted in both economics and biology, why we should have expected this conclusion all along. A 30-year-old woman who wants a family is getting close to the point where she has to choose the best of her available suitors. A 30-year-old man can always choose to wait another five or 10 years till someone better comes along. In general, the longer you spend searching for something—be it a car, a house, or a life partner—the happier you’re going to be with the one you end up with. So—again, with myriad exceptions—a woman’s optimal strategy is to settle for an imperfect mate and then try to change him. A man’s optimal strategy is to search until he finds someone close to perfect. It’s therefore no surprise that women, more often than men, should end up regretting their choices.

    In hindsight, it all makes sense. Once you realize there’s a biological clock, you should be able to predict that men (having searched long and hard for the perfect partner) would make financial sacrifices to preserve their marriages, and that women who stay married to imperfect partners would be kept in their marriages by financial rewards—or, to say the same thing another way, that women who leave their marriages would make financial sacrifices. (And you should also be able to make a lot of auxiliary predictions, such as this one: Wives try harder to mold their husbands than husbands try to mold their wives—because husbands wait until they’ve found wives who need relatively little molding.) Fairness never had anything to do with it.

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  83. on February 5, 2009 at 9:44 am MJ

    Dear Anon,

    I went the law school route — thinking it would land a comfortable life + a hot wife, only to find that while it’s easy to get laid in law school, it’s hard to get laid afterwards — when you’re working a big law job, stressed out all the time, can’t find time to go to the gym, and hate your life.

    Now I am giving up law to go to nyc with no future job prospects. Skip the student loans and keep your happiness. And remember, no matter how much money you make, it’s nearly impossible to get laid from your desk at work.

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  84. on February 5, 2009 at 9:44 am Alex

    As a biglaw lawyer who loves his job, I think choosing a career based on the quality of pussy attracted is misplaced (is there really nothing else that motivates you in life?) and counterproductive. The happier what you do all day makes you, the less you give a shit about what the harridan at the bar thinks, and the more likely your game is to succeed.

    That said, I think the legal profession is getting short shrift here. If you are an attractive and socially adept person with a top-5 JD, you’ll be able to use those social talents to influence your superiors, shifting marginal amounts of gruntwork to some beta down the hall and keeping your hours comfortably around 50-55 a week. Money isn’t everything, but the security afforded by making over 200k in your 20s is pretty nice. After a few years, you’ll be able to save enough to fund several years of gaming chicks in Argentina or Thailand or wherever.

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  85. on February 5, 2009 at 9:59 am Stu

    First of all, IQ matters in law. If you are a hardworking person with an IQ over 150 going to law school is not such a big gamble – you are likely to make big bucks. Let’s focus for a moment on the young women contemplating law school that do NOT have an IQ at that level – should a woman with a B++ IQ go to law school or do something safer like becoming a registered nurse?

    In my humble opinion the decision of a B++ IQ young woman to go to law school is very similar to her decision to spend her 20’s pursuing alphas.

    In both cases the young woman can select the safe stable route or she can enter a tournament and either come out way ahead or way behind.

    Let’s say that you are a woman who is in college. You have B++ looks and B++ IQ. If you go down a path to become a registered nurse, you are very very likely to at the age of 25 be making $40 an hour. Over the course of the rest of your life, you are likely to be able to earn $40 an hour and work as many or as few hours as you want. In other words, being a registered nurse allows you the flexibility to work 60 hours a week when you want the extra income and work 20 hours a week when you only want to work part time.

    On the other hand, if you go to law school you have a shot (a small shot) at winding up with a job that pays you multiples of what you would earn as a RN. But most likely you wind up making much less (or being pushed out of the labor market completely, given the massive over supply of lawyers)

    So the decision to go the law school route is a decision to enter a tournament.

    Similarly, if you carefully avoid dating “alphas” and spend ALL of your time hanging around with stable, dependable but hard working “betas” you have a very good chance of marrying a stable dependable man of similar IQ and similar looks who also makes $40 an hour.

    In most of the USA, a young woman and a young beta both married at 25 both making $40 an hour (if both work full time that is $160k a year of gross income) are solidly in the upper middle class. More importantly, they can save enough of their income that they can stay in the upper middle class for life. Even if a recession hits – I know most people on this blog live in super expensive cities like Manhattan and San Francisco but trust me- in the broad middle of the USA a young couple making 160k gross income can save plenty and insure complete economic security.

    This is a safe, stable route for a young woman. This is the route that her “grandmother” would urge her to go down

    However, we all know there is peer pressure (and biological hard wiring) that influences the young woman to instead pursue alphas and “PUAs” and as a result she is likely to ignore the betas. She enters the tournament to snag an alpha. Most likely she will reach 30 unmarried and bitter. But by entering the tournament she has a chance (small chance) of snagging an alpha.

    My point is that the media highlights the female winners of the tournaments. Peer pressure pushes young women to enter these tournaments. The decision to enter the tournament to land an alpha and pass up the betas is just as irrational as the decision to enter the tournament for a big high paying law job and ignore the safer registered nurse route.

    Usually the safe stable route is better than the “tournament” route

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  86. on February 5, 2009 at 10:01 am Lance

    roissy,

    here’s a feature that i’d like to see. you should answer letters from other advice columns. you could critique the watered-down, mostly BS, answers that mainstream advice columnists give, and then offer up the truth to these poor bastards.

    here’s an example from the dear prudence column on slate.com. this guy, who i nominated for BOTM, seriously needs to be told the truth and not fed some nonsense about trying harder and finding creative solutions.

    Dear Prudie,
    I have been hit hard by the recession. I was laid off, my unemployment has run out, and I’ve had a difficult time finding another job. While I have no problem with scrimping, saving, and freezing my spending until things pick up, my girlfriend of five years, whom I love very much, has started to become very anxious about it. In more lucrative times, when we both had good jobs, we did a lot together. However, in the absence of funds on my part, her general demeanor toward me has become more acerbic and distant. Whenever she suggests we go out and do something, I calmly explain that I’m broke and can’t afford any discretionary spending. She says I have a credit card and could use it if I really wanted to. I respond that that would be completely irresponsible. Then she gets mad and sulks about being bored. Now I’m worried our relationship was only good in proportion to our respective incomes. I’m also starting to worry she’s spending way more than she should, but when I bring it up, she tells me not to “parent” her. I would rather lose a job than lose the girl I love, but it seems being poor is easier when you’re alone. How do I convince her to settle down without seeming like I’m lecturing her?

    —Broke Beau

    here’s the link, so you can see her reply. it’s not total BS, but it falls far short of what this guy needs to hear.

    http://www.slate.com/id/2210565/

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  87. on February 5, 2009 at 11:25 am Anonymous

    The woman suffers no financial loss for divorcing a dutiful husband on a mere whim, while he has to pay her alimony for ever.

    She does if she makes more money than he does.

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  88. on February 5, 2009 at 11:44 am Anon

    Check out the DIVORCE LAWYER, who should’ve known better, who’s paying his ex close to $6000 per month on a $185,000 income:

    “Gregory Donnelly, of Wayne, N.J.’s Donnelly & Warner, concentrates his practice in commercial and residential real estate, personal injury and matrimonial work. During his 2003 divorce, his annual income was estimated at $185,000 based on the prior five years.”

    The ex gets $1000 per week but the kids get barely over $100:

    “A property settlement agreement required him to pay $1,000 a week in alimony to his wife Elizabeth and $350 a week in child support for their three children.”

    Wait, there’s more ass-raping. His income drops to $80,000 but he still has to pay the same amount in alimony and child support:

    “Donnelly applied to Superior Court Judge Michael Diamond in Passaic County for a reduction in payments, arguing that his income had dropped precipitously to $80,000 a year.
    Diamond found Donnelly’s testimony unpersuasive and denied the request, noting that his lifestyle didn’t seem to have suffered.”

    The fucker doesn’t learn and even gets remarried:

    On Monday, the Appellate Division was likewise unmoved, observing that Donnelly “spent $11,354 per month on his shelter, transportation and personal needs, revealing no effort to modify the lifestyle he enjoyed with his new wife and new child despite the alleged deterioration of his law practice.”

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  89. on February 5, 2009 at 12:06 pm gig

    She does if she makes more money than he does

    this is not the usual case, to say the least

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  90. on February 5, 2009 at 12:08 pm JerrDogg

    I read lots of debate about the best life path to follow.

    I wonder if it is best for the quality man to marry the perfect mom very early like I did and then just start banging other women at the very moment she goes frigid and lets herself go.

    Face it: You need a solid mom type to establish your dynasty with high quality DNA from both of you and you need a solid mom type to raise the kids right.

    Do you really want the mother of your kids doing naughty things to you in bed?

    The only problem is when you get older, you’ll have to have affairs with other married women who don’t want a divorce otherwise a young single chick could go psycho on you and you’ll get busted.

    It would be a whole lot better if quality mom types just realized after the 7 year itch that they must accept a string of mistresses if they really have a quality man.

    Also do you really want to invest all your DNA in just one woman’s eggs? I wouldn’t mind at all knocking up some women married to a dork and having the satisfaction that his wussy DNA didn’t infect her progeny.

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  91. on February 5, 2009 at 12:19 pm Colin Bowel

    Is this a story about entrepreneurs adjusting to hard times, or a tale of a beta male doing anything to keep his wife’s bullshit business afloat? You be the judge:

    http://www.cnn.com/2009/LIVING/02/05/economic.survivor3/index.html

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  92. on February 5, 2009 at 12:20 pm Wounded Animal

    Man1,

    Is “I want kids” the reason every time you fuck?

    It’s the homo sapiens specie’s reason every time you fuck. Post-modern society likes to think that ideology can trump biology, and as that view prevails then we become (1) dystopic and (2) extinct.

    My guess is roissy’s at or pushing age 30 and thinking about these things.

    BTW, the trend in alimony in my state anyway is in the other direction now. Unless your wife put you thru school she’s either not going to get alimony or it’s going to be time-limited. Of course, you’re still paying a shitload of money for children who don’t live with you. The awful part of that scenario is your ex-wife keeps the kid with her and has them both in lower living standards, subsidized by your child support payments, when your child could be enjoying a high standard of living by residing with you.

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  93. on February 5, 2009 at 12:23 pm Wounded Animal

    …higher standard of living…

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  94. on February 5, 2009 at 12:26 pm JerrDogg

    >early like I did and then just start banging other women
    >at the very moment she goes frigid and lets herself go.

    I should clarify that I was too much of a wussy to fuck around on my wife when she turned stale so I’m not speaking from experience. It’s just that, looking back, it would have been great not to have all the years of anger and frustration over the fact that my “mommy” wife wasn’t a sexpot anymore. Yet “mommy” wife was at least a good roommate and kept me a little more balanced in the portion of life that isn’t sex. It would be a great ego trip to have both.

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  95. on February 5, 2009 at 1:19 pm JerrDogg

    @Colin

    I think her business is mostly BS. The potential financial upside of her kind of business sucks. In reality 95% of those business just make money for the bank before going tits up – they never generate much revenue and you just end up working harder at your other job to pay for the hole you dug yourself in. You have to look at the “expected value” of your venture and hers is less then the cost.

    I’m not anti-entrepreneur. In fact, I think that it is your CIVIC DUTY to the world to try it once if you have any talent at all. In fact I’m doing it right now and I’ll probably fail. But somebody has to build the next Boeings, Intels, and Exxons of the world and this never would’ve happened if someone like YOU didn’t grow a pair of balls and quit their cushy job. But it has to be a “real venture” for it to count.

    Real ventures with high “expected values” involve doing uncomfortable, risky, unsafe, and confrontational sh*t that nobody wants to do. It gets even more lucrative if it is something that requires 2 things:
    1. some money for “skin in the game” beyond what the average joe saves up
    2. talent and hard work

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  96. on February 5, 2009 at 1:21 pm Anon

    “I wonder if it is best for the quality man to marry the perfect mom very early like I did and then just start banging other women at the very moment she goes frigid and lets herself go.

    …It’s just that, looking back, it would have been great not to have all the years of anger and frustration over the fact that my “mommy” wife wasn’t a sexpot anymore.”

    Men today have forgotten what marriage is for: partnering with a woman who can help you raise quality KIDS and help you secure greater WEALTH.

    Today, men marry for sex.

    The problem with marrying for sex is that a man is depending on ONE woman to sexually satisfy him.

    In the old days, husbands did NOT depend solely on their wives. They fucked mistresses, prostitutes, secretaries, servants, etc.

    Men had the upper hand in marriages because their balls were drained and their minds were clear.

    Any man who places his cock, to shrivel up unsated, in the hands of ONE woman surely feels himself dying on the inside, especially if that one woman is an aging, frigid sexpot.

    But at least you once banged a sexpot. Most married men are left to wonder when their fat cow of a wife, once just a heifer, will bestow pussy upon them.

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  97. on February 5, 2009 at 1:48 pm Wounded Animal

    Colin,

    A “boutique.” Dear God. Her book club coven probably convinced her it was a good idea. And he’s a realtor, which is nonsense. All good realtors know that wives/mothers buy houses. The star agents are always women and the men run the brokerage. You bring in the male broker later, when the wife and the agent have finished tag-teaming the poor sap husband and he’s desperate for a man to validate him for going into a black hole of debt for way more house than he can afford.

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  98. on February 5, 2009 at 3:47 pm kthulah

    I’ll second Anon. The expectation for wives to play both the wife and whore roles is both unrealistic and damaging to men and women.

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  99. on February 5, 2009 at 3:50 pm HR Lincoln

    Jerrdog, I don’t post here much, though I visit here plenty. I enjoy your posts, not just because they’re good stuff, but because you and I have had very similar life experiences, pal. My 10 year marriage came officially to an end yesterday, and the divorce process began in late 2007. The anger and frustration of a sexless marriage went away when I moved out; I suspect the guilt and sadness will dissipate in time.

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  100. on February 5, 2009 at 4:17 pm Tood

    “Tood: actually, the marriage benefits remain even after controlling for wealth prior to marrying, etc. As far as wealth goes, of course the combined income of 2 people (or more rarely 1 income + 1 person’s labor at home) is going to be higher. Married men also receive more promotions and raises at work (starting after they marry) so they make more over time.

    As far as divorce goes, it’s true that women become poorer after divorce (after all, most men earn more than their wives). If you don’t believe me, just type in financial effects of divorce on google. Divorced women have a much higher poverty rate (and most women don’t receive alimony).”

    These are the dumbest two paragraphs I have read on this blog.

    Once again, I am not interested in your copy-paste blindness from feminazi websites.

    1) Corelation does not equal causation. A man who gets promotions at work would have got them anyway, whether he was married or not.

    2) Your idiotic claim that ‘women are poorer after divorce, because men earn more’ ignores the fact that MEN pay alimony to women, and the woman has NO FINANCIAL RISK in leaving her husband on a whim. I don’t know what country you are from, but it is definitely not the US, UK, or Canada. If you are talking about Saudi Arabia, then what you say is true.

    Your suggestion to do an internet search to ‘verify’ your fiction merely will pop up the same feminazi bile.

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  101. on February 5, 2009 at 4:17 pm Tood

    HR Lincoln,

    Did you have kids? How did you make out in the financial settlement?

    Would you ever consider marrying again?

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  102. on February 5, 2009 at 4:27 pm Hawaiian Libertarian

    Your idiotic claim that ‘women are poorer after divorce, because men earn more’ ignores the fact that MEN pay alimony to women, and the woman has NO FINANCIAL RISK in leaving her husband on a whim. I don’t know what country you are from, but it is definitely not the US, UK, or Canada. If you are talking about Saudi Arabia, then what you say is true.

    Furthermore, alimony and child support are never included when imputing “official” income of a female.

    So a lady receiving several thousand dollars a month from her ex, and who also got the house and car in the settlement, who has no substantial bills like a mortgage and car payment and perhaps only works part time (or not even work at all) will have a very low “reported” income that puts her at the “poverty” level…while she in fact can be living quite high on the hog, while her ex-husband lives in poverty to subsidize her existence.

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  103. on February 5, 2009 at 4:58 pm Anonymous

    Alimony is all but dead in the American divorce system. Perhaps if a woman is 60+, never worked, and raised the kids, the judge might give her some sort of alimony for a few years. But a women in her 30’s/40’s probably won’t be getting any alimony.
    The custodial parent will get child support, but since that amount is, in all but a few cases, less than the amount it actually takes to raise a child in the same middle-class environment that they were originally from, the custodial parent will still be paying considerably out of pocket. Because children are expensive.

    That is why most women, post-divorce, are poorer than if they had stayed married. Women’s incomes tend to be lower than men’s, they usually have the kids, and thus don’t have the flexibility to put in long hours at work to make more money, and just the act of raising children is an expensive endeavour. So it makes since that women would be poorer post-divorce than pre-divorce. Most of the women that I’ve talked to that have divorced feel it is worth every penny, just for the peace of mind alone, and many vow never to re-marry. Most divorced men, on the other hand, marry again very soon afterwords. So marriage is worth it to them, I guess.

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  104. on February 5, 2009 at 5:03 pm JerrDogg

    Guys,

    There are a lot of guys who get screwed on the child support thing. Most don’t. Kids cost money to raise and guess what? They are STILL YOUR KIDS. If you split up time 50/50 with the kids and your wife makes a bout the same you won’t be paying much child support if any. If it is an uneven split, there’s all sorts of formulas. Usually this crap is worked out amicably without the courts following a simple formula. Do you really want to shop for clothes for your kids? Judges will tend to be biased against men on the allocation of time when there’s disputes, this is true. But that “cheating slut” is still the mother of your children.

    Alimony in no-faults is turning into the same thing – a formula. I think that formula is skewed in favor of the woman and there are still nutty judges. But by in large, if you’re worried about this crap just marry women who make about the same as you do. A pre-nup is only useful if you have complex financial things going on (inheritance, businesses, etc..)

    I know that there’s all sorts of abuse and unfair judgments. But the fact is that raising kids takes time and money and after a divorce 80% of the time the woman is doing most of the work and spending on the kids.

    They’re wired for raising kids. We are wired for slaying dragons. Slaying dragons makes more money.

    Outside of freedom, what does having money buy you? Gold Diggers?

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  105. on February 5, 2009 at 5:42 pm Glengarry Glenpoon

    for guys who don’t like fat chicks, you sure seem to love riding my ass alot.

    Ha, I gotta admit, that’s a solid hit.

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  106. on February 5, 2009 at 5:47 pm Glengarry Glenpoon

    Stu, how many guys with IQ 150+ are there in the US? A hundred? Not to mention they don’t practice law; they all sit around in bean bag chairs at Google.

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  107. on February 5, 2009 at 7:32 pm Stu

    Glengarry

    i appreciate what you are saying

    but what do you think about my advice to girls in college with iq’s too low for medical school

    (1) avoid alphas and marry a beta
    (2) become a registered nurse

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  108. on February 5, 2009 at 8:15 pm JerrDogg

    >Stu, how many guys with IQ 150+ are there in the US? A >hundred? Not to mention they don’t practice law; they all sit >around in bean bag chairs at Google.

    How are you sure they don’t all sit around and write on this blog while siting in bean bag chairs at Google? But then again working for a big company is beta … unless that big company happens to drill oil in war zones.

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  109. on February 5, 2009 at 8:28 pm Tood

    The combination of No fault + alimony is what kills marriage. Either one by itself would be OK, but the combination is murderous.

    Any woman can simply kick the husband out and keep all his money simply because she does not feel excited by him anymore. Plus, he has to pay her for years after that. Criminal.

    Asset division is not an unfair concept except for those who have a lot of assets. Neither is child support. Even if the woman does not spend the money on the child, you can prove this to the child when the child grows up and sees that you have no inheritance for him because Mommy took it all.

    So the Alimony + No fault combination is the death knell. Alimony should require a high burden of proof. A woman seeking no-fault should not be entitled to any money.

    Social conservatives are a total failure. They spend all their time protesting matters of insignificance (stem cells, gay marriage, abstinence in schools, evolution, prayer in schools) while missing the BIGGEST threat to family stability in America – the no fault + alimony combo. Break that link, and most of their major goals fall into place (2 parent families, more children born, etc.). For them to have missed the forest from the trees so widely, is astonishing to me.

    If American social conservatives are too dumb to notice this feminist fortress, I’ll root for Muslims to attack it. So they bomb a few subways along the way. So what? It is a small price to pay to support the one group that has what it takes to fight feminism.

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  110. on February 5, 2009 at 8:42 pm tokyojesusfist

    Tood, I hope you’re joking. Islam is the purest manifestation of evil on this planet. Just recently there was a story about Muslim terrorists raping both men and women and then shaming them into becoming suicide bombers.

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  111. on February 5, 2009 at 9:54 pm aliasclio

    I’m glad someone who’s been through it is finally challenging the misperception so common on this site – that divorce courts often award women alimony. As far as I can tell tracking this down on line, alimony is awarded in the US in about 9% of divorces. (See here: http://news.ufl.edu/2001/05/21/alimony/. It’s NOT a “feminazi” website, by the way.)

    But there’s still a good deal of faulty reasoning in many of the comments regarding marriage/divorce on this site. Take this comment, for example:
    The awful part of that scenario is your ex-wife keeps the kid with her and has them both in lower living standards, subsidized by your child support payments, when your child could be enjoying a high standard of living by residing with you.
    This makes no sense. If a man’s children lived with him after a divorce, he’d either have to work fewer hours, thus diminishing his income, or hire a housekeeper/nanny to look after them – also a costly undertaking, though perhaps not as expensive as supporting them in a separate household with their mother would be.

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  112. on February 5, 2009 at 10:42 pm Coach C

    Email #4 is clearly you, and you are becoming as bad as G Manifesto with the obvious bullshit.

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  113. on February 5, 2009 at 11:58 pm Tood

    tokyojesusfist,

    I used to think that radical Islam was the worst group in the world. Now, I only think it is the second worst.

    Feminism has ruined more lives of men and children than Al-Qaeda has, in the US. Sure, the divorce courts don’t do direct physical harm to men, but after you see how feminist divorce laws put them in poverty, make them unable to afford health insurance, and drive many of them to suicide, I think the total cost to US male life from feminism is higher than from Al-Qaeda.

    About 7000 Americans have died to Al-Qaeda (3000 on 9/11, 4000 to hostile fire in Iraq and Afghanistan).

    How many men have had their lives utterly ruined by feminism? They may still be breathing, but their lives are no better than those who died on the battlefield (and arguably are much worse).

    So feminism has hurt American men more than Al-Qaeda has. Roissy has said as much in an eariler article.

    Note that only a small percentage of Muslims are active in terror. But almost ALL Muslims are opposed to feminism.

    “raping both men and women and then shaming them into becoming suicide bombers.”

    Sound similar to divorce courts raping a man of his bread and dignity, driving many to suicide, or to an early death from the stress, depression, and lack of health insurance.

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  114. on February 6, 2009 at 12:05 am whiskey

    The awful part of divorce is that it keeps kids from having two parents doing the chidlraising. For most kids, in most marriages, they are better off if the parents at least keep it together until they are 18.

    And yes, divorce DOES make women/kids poorer, because instead of two incomes combined under one roof, there is one income plus whatever is mandated by the court settlement. Because the divorced (and absent) husband must live, he will take some money out of the equation for separate housing, so on. I know, ugly math. But there you go.

    Unless there is physical abuse, it’s better for the KIDS if the parents stay together. But what happens, generally, is that the wife wants a better deal (better guy) and there is a parade of men through her bedroom. Though the dad dumping the wife for a hot secretary does exist, it’s outweighed by the opposite function.

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  115. on February 6, 2009 at 12:34 am tokyojesusfist

    Tood

    I used to think that radical Islam was the worst group in the world. Now, I only think it is the second worst.

    Go live in Saudi Arabia, Iran or Pakistan and see how you like it. No feminism and lots of Islam. What could possibly go wrong?

    Sound similar to divorce courts raping a man of his bread and dignity, driving many to suicide, or to an early death from the stress, depression, and lack of health insurance.

    Yes, this is totally the same thing as rape. I’m glad you haven’t lost touch with reality.

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  116. on February 6, 2009 at 1:03 am Tood

    tokyojesusfist,

    You aren’t really logical or coherent, and don’t know much about the world or about arithmetic.

    Men in America, particularly the 90% of men who are Beta, have about the same rights in divorce court that a woman has under Islamic Law during divorce.

    Sure, 7000 Americans killed at the hands of AQ is MUCH worse than 10 million, 30 million, or 50 million men driven to ruin and early graves by the divorce laws, or 50 million children growing up without fathers.

    7000 dead vs. 50 million suffering a ruined life and early death anyway. Yeah, that sure is a tough call.

    Roissy too has said that feminism is a bigger threat to America than AQ. Go get a clue.

    Social conservatives are a total failure, as I wrote before, and you have proven it.

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  117. on February 6, 2009 at 1:04 am Tood

    tokyojesusfist,

    By the way, defending feminism in the hopes of getting a pat on the head from a few women, and occasional pity-the-beta fucks are a poor strategy. You should know that by now.

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  118. on February 6, 2009 at 1:05 am expat

    Jerdog:

    …They are STILL YOUR KIDS. If you split up time 50/50 with the kids and your wife makes a bout the same you won’t be paying much child support if any…. But by in large, if you’re worried about this crap just marry women who make about the same as you do.

    The advice to marry based on womans financial ability may be sound, but it is none the less useless. Men don’t do that. We never will. We can’t. Because we do not and will never give a shit about a womans financial ability.

    And how much child support is “not much”? And this notion of “they are still your kids” seems fair at first blush. But what about unanted children? Children snuck into the relationship, against the mans will? Or even kids with questionable paternity? Sometimes it may be the man’s kid, but emotionally he doesn’t feel bonded – instead he feels burdened. She wanted it – she was a bitch the whole time they were together, now after the divorce why is that 18 years of hell for the man?

    Not all men find child support to “not be too much”. Child support alone can be quite burdensome. It can be used as an alimony substitute, to allow the woman to take a few years off of work before persuing a non-lucrative but emotionally fulfilling career. A moly coddling for a woman who want the man to be responsible for HER choices. Because sperm is 50% his fault that she misused it.

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  119. on February 6, 2009 at 1:23 am tokyojesusfist

    Tood

    You aren’t really logical or coherent, and don’t know much about the world or about arithmetic.

    And this is coming from the genius who thinks feminism is worse than Islam and that getting shafted in court is the same thing as getting raped.

    Men in America, particularly the 90% of men who are Beta, have about the same rights in divorce court that a woman has under Islamic Law during divorce.

    American men have infinitely more rights than Muslim women.

    7000 dead vs. 50 million suffering a ruined life and early death anyway. Yeah, that sure is a tough call.

    If Islam is so awesome, you should move to an Islamic country.

    Social conservatives are a total failure, as I wrote before, and you have proven it.

    I had no idea I’m a social conservative just because I’m not deluded enough to think that Islam is better than feminism.

    By the way, defending feminism in the hopes of getting a pat on the head from a few women, and occasional pity-the-beta fucks are a poor strategy. You should know that by now.

    Please point out where I have defended feminism, and while you are at it you could also explain to me how I could possibly be looking for “pity-the-beta fucks” when I’m not a beta and not even remotely interested in casual sex.

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  120. on February 6, 2009 at 1:23 am expat

    Todd:

    the one group that has what it takes to fight feminism.

    Actually, they don’t. That’s like saying that the socialists in pre-WW2 germany had what it takes to fight the Nazi’s. You’ve got it ass backwards. The Nazi’s would not have risen to power unless it were as a reaction against the extremism of the commies – many of the leaders of which happened to be Jewish. The commie Jews basically invented the reaction against them, by trying to gain power away from the current business interests. Classis class war. And boy, did they ever lose that time. Showed us all up in the end though.

    Point being, a far right reaction will only get you an emboldened far left. Poor strategy.

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  121. on February 6, 2009 at 1:34 am JerrDogg

    >parents stay together. But what happens, generally,
    >is that the wife wants a better deal (better guy) and
    >there is a parade of men through her bedroom.
    >Though the dad dumping the wife for a
    >hot secretary does exist, it’s outweighed
    >by the opposite function.

    I’m sure a lot of men get cheated on by their wife. But I bet (and there’s a lot of stats to back me up) that it’s the other way around most of the time – at least 5:1. “married dating” sites like Ashley Madison are 85% men, 15% women. Men have higher sex drives and will get horny if their wife doesn’t put out. Some guys will just want to fuck other women even if she doesn’t. Also I find it hard to lay full blame the cheater as the sole cause of the divorce – there probably was a lot of crap going on before the cheating happened.

    I think no fault is a good thing as otherwise you start adding yet another financial incentive to getting people to spy on each other and this is just bad for society (blackmailing is as big cause of civic and corporate corruption as bribing).

    If you come home and find your wife in bed with another man, don’t hit her, don’t move out, etc… You’ll lose custody of your kids if you do that. If you’re both good parents you should just “GFTOW” to get even with her. You can probably even sleep in the same bed and you can even still sleep with her if you wrap it up.

    I’d much rather just have an open marriage, multiple wives (My ego is so damn big that I actually secretly desire to start a dynasty), or discrete affairs than this divorce crap based on the idea that you can have only one fuck partner when clearly our libidos are not made that way.

    I think unrealistic social expectations of absolute partner fidelity are a bigger cause of the break up of families with kids than alimony.

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  122. on February 6, 2009 at 1:35 am expat

    Whiskey

    For most kids, in most marriages, they are better off if the parents at least keep it together until they are 18.

    I’ve heard that said. As a child of divorced parents who for years before the divorce begged my dad to divorce, I have a hard time agreeing though.

    My Dad and our house was way happier absent all the bitching. Seeing him happy teaches me that I can emulate his strong choices, and be happy myself.

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  123. on February 6, 2009 at 1:47 am expat

    JerrDogg

    I’d much rather just have an open marriage,..

    Ya, a lot of us are built that way. I don’t think social discourse has caught up to the fact that humans have genetic classes, as do bees. The Police and Army class are genetically caused to have a sense of moral disgust that the artist class lacks. Artists like us can never understand the Police sense of moral purity.

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  124. on February 6, 2009 at 1:48 am expat

    I’ll have to dig up the references for that last quote. They’ve been around for a while though, so some readers may be familiar already. Some people have 5 moral basic concepts, some have 3. Conservatives tend to have genes that lead them to their views.

    We are not mostly socially constructed.

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  125. on February 6, 2009 at 5:29 am Obsidian

    Nicole,
    I’ve read your earlier comments wrt your grandparents, and I do tend to agree, that it’s better for a generally good Man to have his sexual needs tended to by his Woman on the side, and that Women in general, deep down, know this.

    I’m wondering if you wouldn’t mind, explaining a bit as to how that situation came about for your grandparents? Did they sit down and discuss it, or what?

    Also, I’m of the mind that Women tend to desire a Man more if she knows other Women want him too.

    Thanks.

    The Obsidian

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  126. on February 6, 2009 at 6:28 am expat

    The 5 basic moral attitudes are:
    harm/care
    fairness/justice
    ingroup/loyalty
    authority/respect
    purity/sanctity

    Not everyone has the innate sense of respect for authority and the sanctity of purity. Conservatives tend to be born with
    these. There are genetic reasons for the differences. I
    can’t find the best articles for this research, but here is one http://edge.org/3rd_culture/haidt07/haidt07_index.html,

    A google on “genetic basis for morality” comes up with articles that mention that there could be no ultimate moral stance, from an evolutionary or game playing theory point of view.  It’s a game of rock-paper-scissors. If your society has police, but no artists, it will get beat by the society who has rocks and papers and scissors to fight you with.

    I find it a bit tiresome the endless social/constructivist attitude that is still dominating discourse. Genes and hormones are usually at the root of things.

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  127. on February 6, 2009 at 6:29 am tokyojesusfist

    Why do you capitalize words that are not supposed to be capitalized?

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  128. on February 6, 2009 at 6:42 am Obsidian

    Expat,
    Alright, I’ll bite: when it comes right down to it, are Black folks genetically predisposed towards immorality?

    The Obsidian

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  129. on February 6, 2009 at 6:45 am Expat

    Obsidian, if you want to bite, you’ll need teeth. Babies only gum.

    If it helps you sleep at night, fine. We are all 100% exactly the same. Any differences between people are all learned. I learned my penis at an early age.

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  130. on February 6, 2009 at 7:00 am Expat

    And at what age did you learn your stupidity?

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  131. on February 6, 2009 at 7:42 am Obsidian

    Expat,
    Is that your final answer?

    O

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  132. on February 6, 2009 at 8:18 am Mark in Ark

    Yes, obviously blacks are predisposed towards immorality. Look at Africa or any black area of town.

    A second civil war is coming.

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  133. on February 6, 2009 at 8:43 am expat

    Being simplistic lacks important nuance. Blacks differ in some ways. Morality is not a “thing” that you can be disposed to.

    LikeLike


  134. on February 6, 2009 at 10:09 am kthulah

    Obsidian, I don’t know if they talked about it before my grandfather took on his mistress, but I’m guessing they did. My grandparents were Christian, but very practical people. My grandmother was culturally Catawba, so there was more than just a casual acceptance. A man’s needs are taken very seriously, and it’s viewed as silly to break up a marriage just because the guy is horny and popular.

    …but that wasn’t a “free love” hippy flavored thing. As the primary wife, she perceived any kids that came out of his liasons to be hers. In execution, others did similar things, but her reasoning was very Catawba. It’s more “clan” than “nuclear family”.

    My mom, less practical, prefers monogamy, and I respect that. However, my dad is of a personality/sexual preference that he likes strong, powerful, older women. So mom is still growing into being his fetish ideal.

    I don’t think either is better than the other, but my personal preference is a clan situation. It’s more realistic and flexible, and has the best of both worlds as far as plenty of support but room for expression of individuality, so long as the dominant value system is livable.

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  135. on February 6, 2009 at 2:21 pm johnny five

    jerrdogg said

    It would be a great ego trip to have both.

    but then…

    Do you really want the mother of your kids doing naughty things to you in bed?”

    pick a side, please.

    also. really, seriously, every woman has an inner whore. if you’re not bringing out the one in yours, then you need to step up your game.
    if your marriage was sexless, that’s not entirely her fault.

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  136. on February 6, 2009 at 3:56 pm Glengarry Glenpoon

    Stu, nursing’s a pretty good play if she wants to raise a family. And if she wants to get married, there are only so many alphas around. That means most women who marry will have to marry a beta, or a series of betas. Might as well have the common sense to realize it.

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  137. on February 6, 2009 at 4:03 pm Glengarry Glenpoon

    JerrDog, the bean bag guys are super betas ringing up the till but not getting any. Maybe Roissy can see whether we have any of them among us.

    Anyway, is there anyone in Silicon Valley who dates hot women? (Larry Ellison excepted, and he’s in sales.) The lack of awesome arm candy at the epicenter of tech fortunes kinda confirms the uselessness of money in this game.

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  138. on February 6, 2009 at 7:23 pm Bhetti B

    I think invoking Islamic fundamentalism/Saudi Arabia/terrorism might just be the new Godwin’s law.

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  139. on February 6, 2009 at 9:01 pm JerrDogg

    >Anyway, is there anyone in Silicon Valley who dates hot >women? (Larry Ellison

    Yep, they actually do. I don’t know if it is much better or worse compared to other professional cultures that make as much. Certainly uber-nerdy types have a little trouble – but it’s not too bad as fairly attractive asian women often go for these types. The other thing is that the industry is very man-dominated here so the ratio of men to women is high. SV pros probably do quite a bit worse than athletes and actors certainly. But compared to doctors, lawyers, or financial experts I think it is probably nearly the same.

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  140. on February 7, 2009 at 2:19 am JerrDogg

    I am not a lawyer. But because it keeps coming up here and you should go into these things with your eyes open here’s the rough formulas used in one no-fault state that has some well-developed case law that is often cited by other courts as well:

    CHILD SUPPORT:

    https://www.cse.ca.gov/ChildSupport/cse/guidelineCalculator

    TEMPORARY ALIMONY BEFORE JUDGMENT:
    “Temporary spousal or partner support is generally computed by taking 40% of the net income of the payor, minus 50% of the net income of the payee, adjusted for tax consequences. If there is child support, temporary spousal or partner support is calculated on net income not allocated to child support and/or child-related expenses. The temporary spousal support calculations apply these assumptions.”

    So basically you’re splitting the difference (actually a little less) between your salaries until more formal decisions.

    LONG TERM SPOUSAL SUPPORT:
    Read this
    http://www.divorcesource.com/CA/CODE/4320_4324.html
    But they usually roughly follow the 1977 Santa Clara duration formula:
    They take the above temporary support number (adjusted for things like going back to school, etc…) and have you pay it for about 1/2 the duration of the doomed marriage if <10 years sliding linearly to the whole duration of the doomed marriage after 20 years.

    So say you make $150k and your lazy ex-wife makes (or could make $40k) and you split after 10 years with 2 kids. You put the kids on your health insurance and list them as dependents (not her – you have the higher marginal tax). You split custody time 50/50. She gets ~$14k/year for child support and 5 years of $34k in alimony.

    First 5 years:
    Her net income:
    $40k+$14k+34k = $88k
    Your net income:
    $150k-$14k-$34k = $102k (minus ~$10k for kids health).
    After 5 years:
    Her net income:
    $40k+$14k = $54k
    Your net income:
    $150k-$14k = $136k (minus ~$10k for kids health).

    It gets more complex due to mortgages, weird business assets, and the chick going back to school to get teaching certs so she can have a career, etc…

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  141. on February 7, 2009 at 5:03 am Obsidian

    Nicole,
    Thanks. I really do wish those who disagree with you did so on the merits, or lack thereof of your arguments. And refrained from the personal attacks.

    J5, excellent points to JerrDogg. I agree.

    Salaam
    Mu

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  142. on February 7, 2009 at 9:26 pm Mr. Thoughtful

    “Alimony is all but dead in the American divorce system. Perhaps if a woman is 60+, never worked, and raised the kids, the judge might give her some sort of alimony for a few years. But a women in her 30’s/40’s probably won’t be getting any alimony.”

    Anon, you are wrong that alimony is all but dead now. Unfortunately, it lives. It varies by state. Texas for example rarely gives long term alimony, but many other states do.

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  143. on February 9, 2009 at 1:21 am JerrDogg (on the prowl)

    @johnny five

    Point well taken. I just don’t like the idea of her kissing my kids with the same lips that I….

    I’m thinking I’m going to string things along with the soon-to-be ex and just start having sex with other women to see if it gives me the edge I need. I’m just going to have to not tell her that I’m fucking around right away and maybe when she sees it (she pays the cell phone bill) she’ll agree to the open marriage thing. Somehow I don’t see any inner slut in her going for someone else.

    I dunno… I think I need to ease back into it with some MILFs before going for the 25 year old hotties that I occasionally flirt with in the coffee places. I just know I’m going to be a nervous little wussy with the first one and I don’t want to blow it on the rare 25-year old asian hotties until I’ve got thicker skin.

    I’m starting to collect a few phone #’s but I’m going to have to keep a spreadsheet otherwise I’m going to start forgetting them. What do you PUA guys do – a spreadsheet? I can remember them right now but pretty soon it’s going to get hard. Also my game really sucks balls right now; hopefully it’ll get better once I start blowing my load into some soccer moms on a regular basis.

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  144. on February 9, 2009 at 1:41 am David Alexander

    also. really, seriously, every woman has an inner whore.

    Thanks to spending hours masturbating to porn, the entire idea of a female’s inner whore is almost laughable in most cases, and creepy in others. It’s not that it doesn’t exist, but it’s just not attractive in the case of the vast majority of women, especially when compared to what porn offers.

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  145. on February 9, 2009 at 3:10 am johnny five

    @jerrdogg

    Point well taken. I just don’t like the idea of her kissing my kids with the same lips that I….

    compartmentalize, my man. compartmentalize!
    as a natural in the “adhd game” department, i have no problem compartmentalizing to the max.

    just think: you love your kids with the same brain that generates all those dirty, nasty fantasies.

    what’s yin without yang?

    Somehow I don’t see any inner slut in her going for someone else.

    THE most faithful, loyal woman on the planet is the naturally good girl you’ve successfully turned into a wanton slut – for you only.
    this takes time, effort, game, and, believe it or not, genuine emotion; you’ll likely fall in love yourself when it happens, if you weren’t in love already.

    in my book, these are the only women worth even thinking about committing to.
    ever.

    my game really sucks balls right now; hopefully it’ll get better once I start blowing my load into some soccer moms on a regular basis

    confidence, yes. game, hell no.
    the soccer moms will be good for excising the built-up, crusted “wussyness” you mentioned, but useless for developing your game.
    this is the whole appeal of soccer moms**: they don’t really shit-test, play hard to get, etc. remember that 90+% of “game” consists of the artful circumvention of those barriers.
    on the other hand, soccer moms are tremendously useful for learning new sex tricks (ltr’s have a way of putting you into a rut in that dept).

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  146. on February 9, 2009 at 3:18 am johnny five

    the last double-blockquote above should be normal text. i’m not good with dotting i’s, crossing t’s, or remembering slashes.

    more @ jerrdogg

    I’m starting to collect a few phone #’s but I’m going to have to keep a spreadsheet otherwise I’m going to start forgetting them.

    cell phones store numbers, you know. and names, too!

    seriously, though: i’m not a big believer in spreading myself too thin. if i forget who some girl was, then i’m forgetting because she’s … forgettable. you’ll find that the same is true.
    pua maxim #1: never accord undue importance to anyone or anything.

    unless you just don’t have to work for a living, you’ll probably find it impossible to juggle more than 3-4 girls at a time effectively (not counting one-nighters).

    you’re in the south bay? man, that’s the big leagues. not in terms of talent, but in terms of sheer lack of numbers.

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  147. on February 9, 2009 at 3:25 am johnny five

    @ da

    it’s just not attractive in the case of the vast majority of women, especially when compared to what porn offers.

    i have five senses, whereas you, apparently, have only two.

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  148. on February 9, 2009 at 3:39 am JerrDogg (on the prowl)

    >you’re in the south bay? man, that’s the big leagues.
    >not in terms of talent, but in terms of sheer lack of numbers.

    I’ve always managed in even tougher ratios like 10:1 somehow. I’m sure I’ll work a few road trips in though.

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  149. on February 9, 2009 at 3:41 am David Alexander

    i have five senses, whereas you, apparently, have only two.

    I agree with you that sex induces the use of all of one’s senses, but enjoying sex requires finding a partner of sufficient attractiveness and sexuality, and most women aren’t meeting that bar for me. Even seeing non-date girlfriend with heels and nails on didn’t induce any arousal or potential sexual fantasy at all. In fact, at that point I sorta cringed at wondering what she’d look like naked which admittedly is something that eventually happens to any woman that I find even barely attractive. Their “normal” nakedness is just unattractive even for the thin, conventionally attractive women. OTOH, nothing beats a naked porn star with big ass and nice tits…

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  150. on February 10, 2009 at 9:08 pm Schoppenhour

    Reading thru your blog in 5 mins I see these contradictory statements in 3 diff blog entries… (below)
    Seems your assimilating a lot of info from a lot of diff places… figure it out for yourself… what do you believe … Not what some “mystery method guru thinks”

    1) “Men’s and women’s goals are incompatible. This is war and our job is to win, not fight to a draw or serve as pussy fodder.”

    2) “… and know that undefiled love is possible, despite the cultural inertia and constant drumbeat of societal directives to the contrary.”

    3) “Hookers and liquor. That’s how I plan to live out my old age.”

    By the way… this furfy…
    “East European girls, love the allure of older, sophisticated men.”

    This is total BS… wishful thinking… just like the muslims think there are 72 virgins in heaven for them…

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  151. on February 16, 2009 at 2:11 am _

    test

    LikeLike



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