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Chateau Heartiste

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Pickup Reenactment

August 19, 2010 by CH

Roosh has a couple of funny — and educational — videos reenacting his pickup attempts and interactions with girls. He suggested a contest where people post videos (created via the xtranormal website) of their actual approaches.

Here’s one of mine. It’s a direct game nighttime approach on a girl who was giving me obvious flirty signals.

The fart wasn’t quite that loud in real life.

I don’t recommend cocky direct game unless the girl is throwing out blatant approach invitations.

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Posted in Game, Videos | 112 Comments

112 Responses

  1. on August 19, 2010 at 3:28 pm Firepower

    love the t shirt

    LikeLike


  2. on August 19, 2010 at 3:31 pm j r

    is there a laugh track?

    LikeLike


  3. on August 19, 2010 at 3:52 pm Whatever

    LOL… outstanding

    LikeLike


  4. on August 19, 2010 at 3:52 pm The Truth

    Why didn’t you plow further?

    LikeLike


  5. on August 19, 2010 at 3:53 pm gunslingergregi

    lol that shirt does own.

    LikeLike


  6. on August 19, 2010 at 3:55 pm Hardcore

    That’s gold, Jerry. Gold.

    LikeLike


  7. on August 19, 2010 at 4:01 pm ed

    Well Chateau? Did you end up picking up on her? Or did you just leave on a funny high note?

    LikeLike


  8. on August 19, 2010 at 4:03 pm me me me

    That was sooooooooooo funny!!!! Love the goodbye wave at the end. 😛

    LikeLike


  9. on August 19, 2010 at 4:05 pm Vince

    LOL

    That fucking achieved nothing.

    So absurd, so funny.

    LikeLike


  10. on August 19, 2010 at 4:07 pm Science

    is that a batman outfit?

    LikeLike


  11. on August 19, 2010 at 4:09 pm Z

    so funny! can we please have more of these!

    LikeLike


  12. on August 19, 2010 at 4:17 pm Silver Fox

    OT: Meat wallet in full view…Pussy for hire

    http://dealbreaker.com/2010/08/young-ambitious-female-mba-student-is-deadly-serious-about-soliciting-investment-banking-gig-via-casual-encounters/#more-26532

    LikeLike


  13. on August 19, 2010 at 4:28 pm game.in.bk

    SF:
    She probably won’t even fuck the (beta) guy if he got her the job.
    she is pretty much saying- give me a 150k+ job and maybe we can fuck afterwards.

    LikeLike


  14. on August 19, 2010 at 4:30 pm Whatever

    @ SF

    That woman is a disaster waiting to happen… I’m guessing any person with any business sense at all would never even go near her.

    LikeLike


  15. on August 19, 2010 at 4:30 pm game.in.bk

    fucking lawyers.
    shit- she looks like and sounds like it.
    love that her power suit looks like a suit or armor.

    LikeLike


  16. on August 19, 2010 at 4:38 pm Old Glory

    HAHAHHAHAH

    LikeLike


  17. on August 19, 2010 at 4:48 pm askjoe

    So many lawyer gals in DC. Noting the correlation between looks and IQ, there are a lot of stunning K-street lawyers. I wonder if those are the one’s R has issues with or the public interest types who want to change the world. And then there’s the neurotic, “shit I’ve wasted my looks and $100K on a worthless law degree” types too.

    Anyway, I wonder if there’s a post script, I’ve seen that the “withdrawn offer” is pretty powerful where the guy just says, “oops, sorry for bothering you.”

    LikeLike


  18. on August 19, 2010 at 4:53 pm game.in.bk

    AJ:
    Even the NPO lawyers are wack.

    LikeLike


  19. on August 19, 2010 at 4:55 pm Five of Hearts

    Hilarious! That wave at the end is priceless.

    LikeLike


  20. on August 19, 2010 at 4:55 pm askjoe

    Even Especially, the NPO lawyers are wack.
    FIFY

    LikeLike


  21. on August 19, 2010 at 5:19 pm Ray Sawhill

    Funny vid, looking forward to moresuch.

    How’d you make it, by the way?

    LikeLike


  22. on August 19, 2010 at 5:24 pm myth

    mad genius

    LikeLike


  23. on August 19, 2010 at 5:35 pm Trickster

    Cheers for sharing that Roosh site

    LikeLike


  24. on August 19, 2010 at 5:35 pm Gorbachev

    Lawyers.

    LikeLike


  25. on August 19, 2010 at 5:38 pm Vincent Ignatius

    That was hilarious. I wish it could do her facial expression when you ragged on lawyers.

    LikeLike


  26. on August 19, 2010 at 5:42 pm Nikkibee

    That was adorable! Needs to be a regular series here.

    LikeLike


  27. on August 19, 2010 at 5:58 pm Matt T.

    That was amusing. Shame that the pickup fell apart after she started the lawyer thread, but it is what it is.

    LikeLike


  28. on August 19, 2010 at 6:21 pm Stud Dynamite

    Ouch. I guess shows how important body language, tone, appearance is vs what you actually say. Cause this is entertaining but rather meaningless. So did you close?

    LikeLike


  29. on August 19, 2010 at 6:35 pm Original JB

    Eject! Eject! Eject!

    LikeLike


  30. on August 19, 2010 at 6:42 pm maurice

    This is the second cartoon animation of that type we’ve seen. It’s very funny, it its way. You ought to post “Great Scene Of Game” from the movies using this software. The humor value would be worth the effort.

    LikeLike


  31. on August 19, 2010 at 7:19 pm ATC

    In what sense of the word is this a “pickup”?

    LikeLike


  32. on August 19, 2010 at 7:22 pm Cauthon

    I can’t wait for someone to start in with “Fart Game” analysis:

    The key to Fart Game is the volume of the fart. The louder it is, the more it displays your masculine dominance. If you really want to ramp up the asshole game, turn your back and fart directly at her. When she looks down at your ass, say “Quit checking out my butt. I’m up here.”

    Unlike volume, smell is a DLV since it suggests ill health. You need to reframe in this instance: “I’m trying to raise awareness about air pollution.”

    However, if your diet is high enough in protein, your stench may be so pungent that she immediately passes out. In this case, you can safely carry her back to your place and fuck her. Because chicks are attracted to rapists, she’ll find you irresistible when she wakes up the next morning.

    LikeLike


  33. on August 19, 2010 at 7:39 pm greatbooksformen GBFM

    lozzzllzozlzlzolzozlzl GBFM in his lzozoozlolzl zmoveie no buthex!!!!

    object width=”480″ height=”385″>

    LikeLike


  34. on August 19, 2010 at 7:45 pm maurice

    lolzlzlzolozlzlz!

    LikeLike


  35. on August 19, 2010 at 7:52 pm Pip

    maurice,

    I have to agree with you, my love.

    GBFM’s video was hilarious.

    LikeLike


  36. on August 19, 2010 at 7:54 pm Otis the Sweaty

    This is the greatest thing ever

    LikeLike


  37. on August 19, 2010 at 7:59 pm Roosh

    There’s so many things going on in this video… the head down in shame… beer is tasty… “im getting back to my friends”…. farting sound effect which i didn’t even know existed. Good stuff.

    What’s great about these reenactments is that even normal conversations become very amusing.

    LikeLike


  38. on August 19, 2010 at 8:36 pm saving sanity

    Roissy, You will probably like this post about “fat senstivity”.

    http://tlabine246.wordpress.com/2010/08/19/cbs-missed-the-sensitivity-memo/

    LikeLike


  39. on August 19, 2010 at 8:40 pm saving sanity

    Hilarious video btw. I like the way you look all sad and dissapointed on her being a lawyer. The fart was classic.

    LikeLike


  40. on August 19, 2010 at 8:52 pm Alfalpha

    So now we know how ” lzozoozlolzl ” is pronounced!

    Judging by GBFM’s avatar in his video, I think he might actually be this guy:

    LikeLike


  41. on August 19, 2010 at 8:53 pm Alfalpha

    Sorry, the link is here —

    LikeLike


  42. on August 19, 2010 at 8:56 pm Gx1080

    Roissy:

    Gonna guess. After that, she followed you as a puppy, you did more teasing and the flirting started.

    GBFM:

    http://encyclopediadramatica.com/BitingBeaver

    lolzzzololz

    LikeLike


  43. on August 19, 2010 at 8:57 pm sharpcool

    I like how after she tells you she’s a lawyer, you look disappointed and pause for a long enough time to let her hamster wheel spin. Haha.

    LikeLike


  44. on August 19, 2010 at 9:03 pm guff

    Was the fart intentional or involuntary? Did the lawyer respond? Is it a non-verbal neg?

    LikeLike


  45. on August 19, 2010 at 9:27 pm Brody

    Hmm. Roosh’s voice is not what I imagined.

    LikeLike


  46. on August 19, 2010 at 9:49 pm FF

    Chateau,

    When I click on the tags at the bottom of the posts (e.g., “Goodbye America”, “sluts”, “girls”, etc.) while using my BlackBerry, it shows my links to all your other articles with the given tag. When I do it using the browser on my computers, it shows me links of articles not on your blog. Can you fix this, surely it is a bug?

    LikeLike


  47. on August 19, 2010 at 9:56 pm Arthur

    i feel you should check this out. right up your alley

    http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/35300964/

    tel aviv man accused of running his own harem

    LikeLike


  48. on August 19, 2010 at 10:00 pm cap'n bob

    Chateau’s video was pretty funny.

    But the GBFM/Biting Beaver one is the trippiest thing I’ve ever seen.

    LikeLike


  49. on August 19, 2010 at 10:04 pm VIRGIN

    Wait a minute… the fart is what we girls use to get rid of creepy guys……

    LikeLike


  50. on August 19, 2010 at 10:51 pm pupu

    there are technical limitations. it is very difficult to fart at exactly the right time.

    LikeLike


  51. on August 19, 2010 at 11:18 pm Nikkibee

    Sigh.I love Lego Roissy!

    LikeLike


  52. on August 19, 2010 at 11:47 pm old guy

    @pupu

    Not if you eat enough beans.

    LikeLike


  53. on August 20, 2010 at 1:18 am Captain O

    LOL!!!!!!!!!!!!!

    This video is funny.

    You wound up rejecting her!

    LikeLike


  54. on August 20, 2010 at 1:24 am samseau

    my contest entry

    LikeLike


  55. on August 20, 2010 at 1:24 am samseau

    http://www.xtranormal.com/watch/6960979/

    LikeLike


  56. on August 20, 2010 at 1:28 am VIRGIN

    Where’s the actual “pick up” in this video?

    You didn’t even get a number close.

    LikeLike


  57. on August 20, 2010 at 2:25 am AHE

    of course nobody is going to beat GBFM but here is my lame entry:

    LikeLike


  58. on August 20, 2010 at 5:26 am Anonymous Coward

    http://www.newscientist.com/article/dn19336-wasps-punish-fake-fighters.html

    LikeLike


  59. on August 20, 2010 at 8:36 am Morsellaux

    @ SF

    I liked the neologisms in the comments on that MBA chick. Slore and whunt! LOLOL!

    LikeLike


  60. on August 20, 2010 at 9:10 am Morsellaux

    AHE, not that bad! LOL! GBFM’s I could predict well ahead, yours had creative flair.

    LikeLike


  61. on August 20, 2010 at 9:17 am Nikkibee

    AHE, nice DHV with the slave girls!

    LikeLike


  62. on August 20, 2010 at 10:08 am Sidewinder

    I am watching the GBFM video in a coffee shop, laughing so hard that tears are coming out of my eyes.

    The world demands a video to Three Cock Rule. Its the feel good hit of the summer.

    LikeLike


  63. on August 20, 2010 at 10:20 am greatbooksformen GBFM

    ^^^^^^^^
    “The world demands a video to Three Cock Rule. Its the feel good hit of the summer.”

    lozlzzzozl

    yah i have been in talks with some peoples to drop heavy beats on my rap lyrics to one cock rule and three cock rule lzolzlllzlzzl and bust sum new rhymes like tucker max and goldman sax

    alhpa fucks and beta bucks
    so empowered by goldman sax & tucker max
    neoconning da world into epic debt
    my anal virginity i shoulda kept
    cause now i got dis law degree
    and i am a chick turning thirty
    and its just lotsa cats for me
    cause da betas know my pussy is dirty
    dey know that i had lotsa cocka in college
    as i was bernakified filled with lsat knowledge
    solving sudoko puzzles to qualify for goldman sacks
    while jefefrson and homer rot away in teh library’s stacks
    and now i’m werin’ short skrts to sell sub prime loans
    servicing the top dog alpha mba making him groan
    no kids no family for me
    caus i’m epmowered — that’s what my cats tell me.
    lzozozlzllzozl!

    yah man feel free to use it all anywhere lzozlzolzzoz i thk the matrix post would be funny in digital animation:

    http://greatbooksformen.wordpress.com/2010/05/27/i-can-show-you-the-way-neo-but-you-will-have-to-walk-it-zlozlzlzozzlozlzlzo/

    alos one cock rule would rock as a animated rap:

    OMG both of you betado9uches above are violating THE ONE COCK RULE!!!

    You are alloowing chix to bring other COCKS into your mind lozlzlzzoz zlozllzl. The second a chick makes me think of another cock she is outta my house outta my mind or if she’s texting on a date which almost never happens because i almost never date i go “i gotta use the men’s room lzozlzl” and then i leave her with the bill. she can text her ten other cocks to comne over and pay for her drniks/dinner lzozlzlzllzlzlz and then,. after paying, they have full right to gizizizizizalizzz all over her lzozlz

    “I’ve been seeing this girl for a year. We live together and I’ve still got hand.”

    OMG lzozzlzll wtf are fuckity fucks doing with chix in your homes? lzozlzlzlz omg lozlzlzlzlzl looozers lzozlzlzlz1!! hzhzh

    THEY VIOLATE THE ONE COCK RULE THEY ARE OUT! OUT!

    OUT!

    O U T OUT! lzozlzlzl

    OMG lozlzlzozlozozolzl wft r u doing dating a chick 4 a yer did your dick fall off? Were yu chosen by Beernanke and given an award and medal to support today’s slutty slutt vampiressses cuckholders cockcutters?

    sounds 2 me it is the latter as u have no cock lzozlzlzlzl lzzozl

    and she made you think of another cock

    fucktard haven’t u heard of the one cock rule?

    hey roissy yo!! let’s teach these douches somethin ’bout nbein a man yo!

    throw a beat over this way.
    yo yo yo yo
    yo yo yo

    now hit it!

    one cock rule one cock rule
    i ain’t no beta fool i ain’t no beta tool
    about another cock ya make me think
    i’m gone, yo bitch,
    let the betas buy yas yer next drink

    one cock rule one cock rule
    i ain’t no beats fool i ain’t no beta tool
    over vampires and werewolfe you ginas all drool
    letting their cocks touch your deep down stool
    then you blame the betas in school
    and transfer wealth for the bernanke gene pool
    jonah goldberg sends our alphas 2 die on foreign shores
    stuffing his face with dc pizza as they die in fiat wars
    neocon womenz repeating butthexers lies in their mags
    even after menopause and no need for da ragz
    telling young chickas to lust after vampires
    as they build their fiat empires

    one cock rule one cock rule
    i ain’t no fool i ain’t no tool
    about another cock ya make me think
    i’m gone, yo bitch,
    let the betas buy yas yer next drink

    let the betas pay to raise your bastard kids
    let the betas sign teh fiat masters marriage contracts
    theft in fiat inflation is hid
    as they swing their bankrupting axe
    i don’t care what last night u did,
    ever since i kicked ya gina out, i been relaxed.

    as they promote butthex across the land
    ripping out fetuses from parenthood planned
    as fathers form teh homes the neocons ban
    the atalnatic authoresses just don’t undertsand

    but when chix wakes up and her butt is sore
    it’s not my fault no–it’s cause she’s a whore
    as the fiat masters desoul women with butthex cock
    teach them to transfer wealth with pre-teen strumpet rock

    one cock rule one cock rule
    i ain’t no fool i ain’t no tool
    about another cock ya make me think
    i’m gone, yo bitch,
    let the betas buy yas yer next drink

    womenz womenz bernanke took advanatge of you
    you wasted your best years on vampires and werewolves
    and now you cry your tears cause of your sore anus
    stamp your little feet saying, “you betas must pay for this!!!”

    and aging neocon women promoting butthexing vampires
    teacxhing women to lust after the undead
    as the neocons suck the western world dry
    bankrupting it all,m enlsaving it debt
    while selfish womenz at the atalnatic monthly
    cry cry cry
    cry cry cry
    not for you or me
    but for themselves
    not for the 50,000,000 aborted souls
    but for their dried up ginas and sore assholes
    so many chances they had to marry a nice guy
    but he left her dry
    so whe butthexed with the asshole
    and now see her cry
    and wonder why
    and transofrm the entire univeristy
    into a program to further the fiat lie
    to transfer wealth and wage war and death
    to about fifty million more
    and redefine fifty cocks in her ass as empowered
    and not a whore

    all together now!

    lzozllzzl lozlzlz zlozozoz
    lozlzl lzozozlz ozlzooz zlo9oo
    lozlzlz ozlzoozl ozlzlzoz lzozlz zlzoz zlzozzlozlzozlo

    one cock rule one cock rule
    i ain’t no fool i ain’t no tool
    about another cock ya make me think
    i’m gone, yo bitch,
    let the betas buy yas yer next drink
    alreayd seen yer pink stink
    bent ya over the sink

    and howscomes the bankers southpark never does satarize
    because everything is fair game–truth love honor–excpet for fiat butthexing lies.

    all together now!

    lzozllzzl lozlzlz zlozozoz
    lozlzl lzozozlz ozlzooz zlo9oo
    lozlzlz ozlzoozl ozlzlzoz lzozlz zlzoz zlzozzlozlzozlo

    AND THREE COCK RULE:

    ^^^^ to the 24 for or so tardbetadouches who voted my “one cock rule” rap down

    lozlzlzlzlozzllzlzlzlz

    what do ya want?

    a two cock rule rap?

    or three cock rule?

    three cock rule, three cock rule,
    i’m a beta herb my own cock won’t do
    i need a chick to cuckold me
    i need a chick on me to pee
    three cock rule, three cock rule,
    i love being the greater fool
    one cock in her mouth, one in her anus,
    i keep mine in my pants,
    and pay her bills and rent and fare for da bus.
    so she can club and grind, on denim cocks dance.
    three cock rule, three cock rule,
    i treat my lady like a nice guy,
    give her chivarly while with 2 others she doth lie,
    three cock rule, three cock rule,
    while your cock doth touch her stool,
    i play videogames @ home in my single mom’s basement,
    as teh fed fianance feminsits studies @ school,
    teaching her to love and bail out the butthexers,
    to persucte me 4 letting her live 4 free,
    while she tickles drummer/druggie cock until it goes
    splooge splooge splooge! tee hee tee hee!
    three cock rule, three cock rule,
    i’m the beta herb, teh cuckholded fool,
    i respect her, keep my cock in my pants,
    fund her with other cocks to dance.

    lozlzlzlzl

    or would u betaherbs prefer a five cock rule rap! omg i bet someofya would like dat! lzozl

    lzozozozo

    LikeLike


  64. on August 20, 2010 at 10:39 am pupu

    Pupu wants Biting Beaver’s outfit in that video.

    LikeLike


  65. on August 20, 2010 at 10:45 am gunslingergregi

    gbfm always there to cheer the masses.

    Maybe a little rap for equality?

    LikeLike


  66. on August 20, 2010 at 10:56 am pupu

    @old guy

    “Not if you eat enough beans.”

    yeah. that is true. but the problem is no longer how to explode at the right time but how to stop exploding for the rest of the time.

    LikeLike


  67. on August 20, 2010 at 11:06 am pupu

    AHE’s video has had a live movie adaptation played by Elizabeth Taylor and Richard Burton.

    LikeLike


  68. on August 20, 2010 at 11:08 am Morsellaux

    pupu, just enough beans (not a lot), so you can muster the shaped IEF charge when needed. 😉

    (IEF = improvised explosive fart)

    PS Mayo may provide the right amount of ammunition (dependent on your intestinal fauna/flora)

    LikeLike


  69. on August 20, 2010 at 11:14 am pupu

    thank you, Morellaux,

    all guys here should master that trick. IEF can be very charming.

    LikeLike


  70. on August 20, 2010 at 11:22 am game.in.bk

    LikeLike


  71. on August 20, 2010 at 11:22 am Morsellaux

    Really, pupu? Well, whatever makes your happy. I hope you are not trying to acquire a man-harem, you sneaky one!

    LikeLike


  72. on August 20, 2010 at 11:23 am game.in.bk

    LikeLike


  73. on August 20, 2010 at 11:49 am Firepower

    pupu

    AHE’s video has had a live movie adaptation played by Elizabeth Taylor and Richard Burton.

    didnt know WAOVW
    translated well
    into imp

    some subtext is lost

    LikeLike


  74. on August 20, 2010 at 12:55 pm game.in.bk

    LikeLike


  75. on August 20, 2010 at 12:57 pm game.in.bk

    yup, this dialog really happened on my last date.
    she is currently ignoring my texts.

    LikeLike


  76. on August 20, 2010 at 1:54 pm Firepower

    game.in.bk

    yup, this dialog really happened on my last date.
    she is currently ignoring my texts.

    why no commenting on your blog; that’s fogus

    your calling her an asshole was valid: she was and is, a female asshole.

    such charm, grace, consideration and poise for a special ed teacherette. No wonder they spend their days doped up on meds or bashing their heads against tree bark

    LikeLike


  77. on August 20, 2010 at 1:57 pm Firepower

    roischateax

    Here’s one of mine. It’s a direct game nighttime approach on a girl who was giving me obvious flirty signals.

    the more i watch this, the more i enjoy – especially the lawyer neg thrown.

    LikeLike


  78. on August 20, 2010 at 11:25 pm Chris from Dublin

    Gay or straight, fart game is hugely important because it’s wrapped up in very basic human psychology. The alpha male farts to show the other person (beta male / woman / child etc) that he’s the boss. It’s slightly politer than pissing on them. There’s direct dominance. There’s also the message that, I’m so alpha, I’m not embarrassed (see bad breath game, a close cousin). Besides, real men are allowed to smell (but not BO, interestingly enough).

    BUT!! It’s essential that the fart be loud and that the farter not have the slightest flinch of embarrassment. I remember being in a college dining hall with a woman friend and, at the end of a sentence, I lifted my ass and farted loudly on her. It was heard by everyone and she made a huge fuss (“eewwww” etc). I acted as if nothing had happened and kept on talking. That’s the only way.

    Fart game – not for herbs or betas.

    LikeLike


  79. on August 20, 2010 at 11:35 pm Joe Eoj

    Is it my imagination, or has insulting women taken the place of picking them up here?

    LikeLike


  80. on August 21, 2010 at 5:08 am gunslingergregi

    Easy to idealize man.

    Dificult to idealize woman they are not great at anything.

    LikeLike


  81. on August 21, 2010 at 5:15 am gunslingergregi

    For intance I just saw a couple guys mix cement out in the yard (no cement mixer just a hoe and a pile of dirt) and tile the whole side of my house on the outside and connecting to the next house so there is a nice ceramic walkway to get to backyard and backdoor area. They did it from dirt to tiled in under 3 hours. Pretty great shit. I was like fuck. That is pretty wild shit. Cost under 70 dollars. Great.

    LikeLike


  82. on August 21, 2010 at 5:20 am gunslingergregi

    I shouldn’t say yard I have a patio I guess it is all brick inlaid into cement for grip but I might go tiles with grip just for the fuck of it and because it would look tight. Go with some crazy ass blue color or something maybe marble.

    LikeLike


  83. on August 21, 2010 at 7:14 am Chris from Dublin

    (BUT!! It’s essential that the fart be loud and that the farter not have the slightest flinch of embarrassment)i

    As also said the fart should be slightly smelly but not too bad to suggest illness (thereby ruling out all Ireland’s Guinness drinkers).

    Other rules:- the fart must be 100% deliberate. The man must precede the fart by (if sitting) tilting and lifting an ass cheek to allow the gas free escape or (if standing) shifting his weight onto one leg and lifting the other slightly. He must then return casually to his prior position.

    He should NOT indulge in frat-boy shit like giggling or cheering – he’s not with his mates (although this should be done when farting with kids). He must keep eye contact with the woman, remain unsmiling and act as if nothing has happened. That is, he’s so alpha that he’s genuinely not embarrassed. It’s not good enough to pretend not to be embarrassed -he must actually not be embarrassed.

    LikeLike


  84. on August 21, 2010 at 9:37 am Chris from Dublin

    Italics fail

    😦

    LikeLike


  85. on August 21, 2010 at 2:57 pm Firepower

    in Eire, it’s not only common to fart during courtship, but the guarnteed SNL begins with punching a lass square in the mouth

    LikeLike


  86. on August 21, 2010 at 3:17 pm Science

    LikeLike


  87. on August 21, 2010 at 6:08 pm Jeffrey of Troy

    for weightlifters:

    (“can squats cure cancer?”…”yes.”)

    LikeLike


  88. on August 21, 2010 at 6:21 pm Jeffrey of Troy

    @Alfalpha

    “So now we know how ” lzozoozlolzl ” is pronounced!

    Judging by GBFM’s avatar in his video, I think he might actually be this guy:”

    The ultimate irony would be if GBFM turned out to be… Tucker Max.

    LikeLike


  89. on August 21, 2010 at 7:39 pm anplayer

    @Chris from Dublin

    Irishwomen have absolutely no sense of humor about farts. I agree with you about the Guinness. What type of beer would you recommend for this purpose or is fart game best executed sober? I hope things ended happily for you and the lady in question.

    LikeLike


  90. on August 21, 2010 at 8:01 pm anplayer

    @fIREPOWER

    lOL. other way round. when an Irish lass gets so enraged she throws her drink over you, you know you’re getting somewhere. It’s a normal part of the courting dance here. Our women are a feisty lot.

    LikeLike


  91. on August 21, 2010 at 8:30 pm Tupac Chopra

    in Eire, it’s not only common to fart during courtship, but the guarnteed SNL begins with punching a lass square in the mouth

    @SD:

    LikeLike


  92. on August 21, 2010 at 10:04 pm sdaedalus

    @Tupac

    I’m not sure why you put a reference to me above, over your video of the Blarney Stone.

    The comment about red-socking a girl in the face was made by Firepower not me. If anyone tried this with me they would get a sharp kick in the nuts in return. I have exceptionally good reflexes and was the highest scoring forward (no, not in that sense) on my primary school soccer team.

    Although I am Irish, I don’t engage in any blarney, I am a very matter of fact person with my feet on the ground and my tongue firmly in my cheek.

    No disrespect intended to its red-footed proprietor(s) but I have withdrawn from commenting on this blog and am merely posting here to correct any misapprehension that may have been created by your reference to me.

    I am of course always contactable at my own blog.

    LikeLike


  93. on August 21, 2010 at 11:15 pm Chris from Dublin

    @anplayer – that girl is one of my best friends. She knows that even mentioning my public farting is simply a waste of her time.

    I’m a fag by the way and alpha farting is almost obligatory on the gay scene.

    Re: Irish stereotypes – meh :/

    LikeLike


  94. on August 22, 2010 at 1:06 am Word Around the Campfire – the Moveable Feast edition « Hidden Leaves

    […] Renegade: Virginity Is More Important To Men Than Women Would Admit and Pickup Reenactment Possibly related posts: (automatically generated)Locus of ControlLocus of Control and […]

    LikeLike


  95. on August 22, 2010 at 11:04 am anplayer

    @Chris
    That figures. The gay pubs were alwasy the smelliest when I was a student. My gay friend Sully, lord rest him, used to joke that you’d need a gas mask for the George on George’s Street at the best of times, and not just to protect from unwanted embraces.

    @Tupac
    I can confirm that SD does indeed hava kick like a mule, but her aim is poor, and being a pipsqueak she’d nearly hve to raise her foot above her head to make contact with my mighty crotch. The kneecaps have come in for some battering over the years, though.

    LikeLike


  96. on August 22, 2010 at 11:33 am Gunslingergregi

    ””’Firepower
    in Eire, it’s not only common to fart during courtship, but the guarnteed SNL begins with punching a lass square in the mouth
    ”””
    Actually once a achieve the matrix level of pussy and it is all just 1’s and 0’s you don’t have to punch them in the mouth anymore.
    lol

    LikeLike


  97. on August 22, 2010 at 1:21 pm Firepower

    sdaedalus

    @Tupac

    I’m not sure why you put a reference to me above, over your video of the Blarney Stone.

    The comment about red-socking a girl in the face was made by Firepower not me. If anyone tried this with me they would get a sharp kick in the nuts in return. I have exceptionally good reflexes and was the highest scoring forward (no, not in that sense) on my primary school soccer team

    A Convent
    Doesn’t
    Count

    LikeLike


  98. on August 22, 2010 at 1:24 pm Firepower

    anplayer

    @fIREPOWER

    lOL. other way round. when an Irish lass gets so enraged she throws her drink over you, you know you’re getting somewhere. It’s a normal part of the courting dance here.

    this is a suspicious claim:
    NO Irish – man nor lass –
    ever throws alcohol away

    LikeLike


  99. on August 22, 2010 at 1:49 pm anplayer

    @Firepower

    That’s what I mean – you know you’re onto something when a girl’s hindbrain prevails over her national instincts.

    By the way, I’ve graciously assented, on a whim, to SD’s request that I communicate to you the following:-

    (a) Her extensive knowledge of pigtail pulling was hardly gleaned at a convent school
    (b) It is true that she spent some time with the nuns, where she became familiar with the prevailing Catholic doctrine that all men were beasts and all women whores. However she subsequently parted ways with them after she began to question this doctrine (i.e. become annoying)
    (c) It was a co-educational football team, and being small and fleet of foot she was well able to dodge tackles.

    I can confirm most of the above, but I think she may be overestimating her fleetness of foot. She was so annoying as a child I’d susspect none of her classmates could be bothered running after her.

    LikeLike


  100. on August 22, 2010 at 2:03 pm Firepower

    sd as a fleet of foot Irish lassy at convent school conjures up images of those sturdy Gaelic ankles and thick calves so prized there

    anplayer and I must pub together some day. we surely could find her a fella

    LikeLike


  101. on August 22, 2010 at 2:18 pm anplayer

    @Firepower

    lol. She’s already tweeted me requesting I reply to your comment on her behalf. I dold her if she wanted an amanuensis she could go out and find it herself. With her personality, it might be easier to find than a fella. If you’ve read her blog, you;ll see what happened the last time I tried to find her a good man.

    I agree with you on the leg thing (although SD’s are not the worst, there is certainly room for improvement). The Polish girls here, on the other hand….

    LikeLike


  102. on August 22, 2010 at 2:44 pm Firepower

    a.) see mate, “amanuensis” is a sexist, misandrist term.
    what she needs is a “apersonuensis”

    whats good for the goose, is good the gander-person.

    b.) Polish girls are actually better. Many are real blonds whos only proclivity is to submissively roll over for anal when drunk – unlike irish girls who, the drunker they get, the more belligerent they become trying to smoke my cigars and issue slurred armwrestling challenges.

    nastay.

    C.) No, i have not read her blog…

    LikeLike


  103. on August 22, 2010 at 2:53 pm sdaedalus

    @Firepower

    Not that it matters in the slightest, given that everyone is a god(dess) on the internet, but I do not have thick ankles or meaty calves.

    @AnPlayer

    You should be ashamed of yourself. I never asked you to be my whatever-you-call it or to indeed post anything on my behalf.

    If I meet any Polish girls on my search for a Sane Man, I’ll send them in your direction, guys, so that I don’t have to suffer the indignity of having to compete with them.

    PS: I don’t smoke either.

    LikeLike


  104. on August 22, 2010 at 3:02 pm anplayer

    @Firepower

    I agree with you about te Polish girls. My main problem with Irishwomen is not the arm-wrestling, he smoking, the fat legs or the fake tan, but simply that, like liddle doggies, they NEVER STOP YAPPING. I bet all those DC lawyer chicks are of Irish origin.

    What’s the accidental pregnancy rate among Polish girls btw? For personal reasons (I have an unusually hgh sperm count, these suckers are rampant, I am not kidding) I cant afford to take any risks in this regard.

    @SD

    In the nicest possible way,sweetie (‘cos I know your bark is worse than your bite) you might like to note yapping comment above.

    LikeLike


  105. on August 22, 2010 at 3:17 pm Firepower

    anplayer

    @Firepower

    What’s the accidental pregnancy rate among Polish girls btw? For personal reasons (I have an unusually hgh sperm count, these suckers are rampant, I am not kidding) I cant afford to take any risks in this regard.

    the rate is pretty high in ireland: Polish girls seek citizenship in the only country that sees e’en those walking beertubs with ovaries as respectable teetotalers. they’re all both Catholics, so meh.

    Even though both these Catholic Cuties vigorously practice the Pope’s Anal Caveat, I’d stick with the Polskas – their racks are always larger compared to the ubiquitous Petite Irish Missy’s Guiness Widgets – plus you have their extra bounty to boobjob upon.

    LikeLike


  106. on August 22, 2010 at 3:25 pm anplayer

    @Firepower

    Thanks for the warnin’. i’ve noted a reluctance on the part of Irish women to get pregnant by me of late, but of course the citizenship thing might override my pecuniary limitations and increasingly droopy chops.

    I’ve thought about a vasectomy, but it’s hard for a guy to give up the fantasy of a family football team.

    PS: out of the corner of my ear, coming in loud and clear by telepathy across a two hundred mile difference, I hear a little doggy cry “put I don’t even drink….”

    PPS: wtsfj is the ‘anal caveat’ – sounds like something you’d find in a gay pre-nup (no offence Chris)

    LikeLike


  107. on August 22, 2010 at 3:26 pm Firepower

    sdaedalus

    @Firepower

    Not that it matters in the slightest, given that everyone is a god(dess) on the internet, but I do not have thick ankles or meaty calves.

    that still
    wont get me
    to post on your blog

    LikeLike


  108. on August 22, 2010 at 3:34 pm sdaedalus

    @GetsAroundSoMuchHeCan’tRememberWhereHe’sBeen

    that still
    wont get me
    to post on your blog

    You’ve already posted on my blog you big eejit. At 5.59 Irish time on the 4th August to be exact (Emo Girl post). You wrote as follows:-

    Eire is the perfect place to plan,
    drink, smoke, fuck and fight
    – i plan to retire there

    And you said above you’d NEVER READ MY BLOG.

    I now feel just as good as the little girl did at the end of this video:-

    LikeLike


  109. on August 22, 2010 at 3:35 pm Firepower

    anplayer

    @Firepower

    PPS: wtsfj is the ‘anal caveat’ – sounds like something you’d find in a gay pre-nup (no offence Chris)

    none taken.

    The precise definition you seek is The Pope’s Anal Caveat.

    That is of course, the famous Catholic birthcontrol thing favored by Irish Girls and altar boys everywhere.

    the reluctance on the part of Irish women to get pregnant by you lately is because they want what they see on tv, so now they want to be WAGs of Algerians, blacks and muslims. preferably unemployed ones too

    LikeLike


  110. on August 22, 2010 at 3:45 pm anplayer

    @Firepower

    Like Irish dancing and Danny Boy, I think the anal caveat’s more of an Irish American thing. Most Irish girls these days are too drunk to impose any caveat at all. in my far off, 1990s youff, there was a tendency among nice middle class Irish girls to take off all their clothes, get into bed and NOT GO ANY FURTHER, maybe a quick stroke if one was extremely lucky, but once their virginity was (eventually) lost then so were their inhibitions. I’ll zxk the mothers of my children next time I meet them, but I’m not sure the anal caveat ever applied here. We didn’t know about oral sex until your President decided to illuminate us, growing up in Dublin a hair salon called Peter Marks advertised a wash & blow job for 10 pounds without any eyebrows being raised.

    LikeLike


  111. on August 22, 2010 at 8:27 pm Chris from Dublin

    @anplayer – none taken. I’m not just a douchebag, I’m a doucheFAG! We douchebags can laugh at ourselves real easy.

    🙂

    I infer that you’re Irish too, yes?

    LikeLike


  112. on August 23, 2010 at 4:30 pm anplayer

    @Chris from Dublin

    Yep. I’m a Dub too.

    LikeLike



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