Hilarious Interview With Mayor Of Johannesburg About Upcoming World Cup

See it here.

“If the public transport was any good would you use it?”

“Absolutely, absolutely.”

“So you admit that it’s not?”

😆

It just gets worse better from there.

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Why Game Will Continue To Be Relevant

Reason One

Money is becoming less important as a male attractiveness criterion for women. Note that this doesn’t mean women don’t prefer richer men than themselves; what it means is that more women are making good money and thus the pool of higher income men is smaller than it was in the past. Since women are incessantly driven by their genetic algorithm to seek a higher status mate than themselves, they will respond to culturally imposed shifts in mate quality by evaluating men based on whichever attractiveness traits signal the men’s higher status. As money becomes relatively less important at signaling male status, other criteria will emerge to take its place, such as looks, charm, thuggishness and…. wait for it….

game.

Reason Two

Marriage is on the outs. Wives are being encouraged to dump their husbands, and men are rethinking the wisdom of getting hitched. As falling rates of marriage soak up fewer young single women, men will have more unencumbered pussy to plunder, and they’ll do it with… wait for it…

game.

Reason Three

Chicks dig it.

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This Is How It Starts

The making of an Entitled American Princess:

Notice how she’s using the bathroom sink as a makeshift pedestal.

(much love finefantastic!)

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Reader Mailbag: Flakes, Snakes and Alpha Male Tales

Email #1:

I am currently seeing a girl who I like to invite over to my place to have some fun.

She often follows through, but at the last minute she flakes or attempts to make changes to my plans. Recently, she’s done this 3 days in a row.

I don’t get angry, but I don’t budge when she asks me, for example, to go out of my way to meet her downtown to hang out with her and her gay friend at the last fucking minute.

I told her that I couldn’t make it, and that I needed two weeks’ notice before we changed any plans from here on out.

At this point, I’m going to be super lazy at responding to her texts.

What do I do to straighten this thing out?

Ed

What we know: Girls flake when your alpha gravity pull is weak. She’s keeping her options open. Think of flaking as a whoreschach test of your mettle — the more you acquiesce to her flakiness, or seem to tolerate it, the more beta you appear. She’s flaked on you three days in a row? This means you attempted to set something up repeatedly in the teeth of three straight disses of your masculinity. Rat-a-tat, alpha down flat! Remember, your time is always worth more than her time. Why behave as if just the opposite is the working premise?

As for not meeting her downtown with her BGBF, well, that’s the minimum threshold of expected spine-stiffened behavior. Don’t pat yourself on the back too hard.

Here’s what I recommend: Stop trying to make plans with her. That should be step number one. It sounds like she’s still texting you out of the blue, so that means she wants to keep you active in her pool of prospects. How does it feel being a third stringer to a disrespectful ego-inflated bitch? Not very alpha, eh? Good. Now take that feeling and turn it into beneficial asshole game. Don’t respond to her texts for a week. When you do respond, keep it short and serrated:

“Hey blabby girl, gotta go. talk later.”

Of course you won’t be talking later. Wait another week. Ignore any of her texts in the interim. After that (if she’s still texting), text her back with this (ignoring whatever was the substance of her text):

“Drinks at 8 at X. Be there by yourself. yr buying 1st round.”

If she balks, don’t reply. Think of this as the textual equivalent of a backturn. Write her off, or, if you’re a particularly cheeky sort of fellow, fuck around with her everytime she texts in the future:

“Still texting? Come over. I got a new couch I want to fuck you on”

“You’re annoying”

“Stop wasting my text plan”

“gay”

“titty fucking. love it or hate it?”

***

Email #2:

I’ve been seeing this girl for a year. We live together and I’ve still got hand. Her during sex two weeks ago: “If you hit me this time use your left hand, the left side of my face hurts from last time.” I’m still flirting with other girls near her, etc.

Two days ago she tells me that a guy that used to be really mean to her when they worked together emailed her out of the blue (apparently they never hooked up) . He said when they worked together three years ago he actually liked her. She wanted to know what she should write back. My antenna tingled. I played it cool and insinuated he was a weirdo but she still wrote him back a short message.

She didn’t say anything else about it. Last night we were at a bar and she was blowing up with texts. I checked her phone and it was the guy. He isn’t very slick, but since she seems to be eating it up, I’m concerned. He is already hinting he’ll come visit her this summer (we’re going to be in separate cities). I’d like to squash this, any suggestions for my next move?

Other facts: This guy is 2,000 miles away now so they haven’t done anything yet. She is leaving in a week and will be gone for the summer. Right now, she doesn’t know that I know this guy been texting her.

ST

Sounds like you’ve got an ingenue on your hands. This type of girl will coordinate the attentions of multiple men in order to ensure she gets access to the maximum amount of resources. Think Carla Bruni. (Until recently, that is. Poor Carla has hit the wall badly, so she will no longer be playing her game of roll out the cock carpet.) When a girl starts waxing soap operatically to you about some random dude out of the blue, it means one of two things — she’s coaxing a jealous reaction out of you so you’ll give her more attention and love, or she’s musing about cheating and/or leaving you and her inner thoughts are tumbling out of her like a burp from a colicky baby.

First, this was a moment when you shouldn’t have played it cool. A bit of the ol’ ultrabadass would have done more good. No girl I’m dating for a year is going to get my permission, either directly or indirectly, to email an interloping male admirer. The way to answer your girlfriend’s head games is with the dread of loss:

“Hey, great idea, you email your hard-up stalker, and I’ll email my ex-girlfriend. Sound like a plan?”

She’ll get the idea.

Unfortunately, she emailed him, and the result was an extended textplay. (If you remind yourself that wordplay to women is like a handjob to men, you’ll be a little less tolerant of your girlfriend’s phone blowing up with texts from another man.) What were you expecting? Girls live for this sort of multi-headed male attention. Your operating assumption from this point forward should be that she will cheat with him if they ever get together. And that she is completely untrustworthy. You may want to run the Door Pattern on her before she leaves on her trip. I wouldn’t confront her about the texts, as this will only make you appear a jealous low-value lover. I’d just insinuate that the upcoming time apart would mean a lot of exhilarating freedom for the two of you, and that any funny stuff that you find out about means you are out the door for good.

~~~

ST emailed me a followup a few days later, after I had already written my reply to his first email above:

Well R, it looks like this is definitely over. She sent him an eight paragraph email. I had four words, “I’m kinda
seeing someone.” Then there was an entire paragraph about meeting up after she leaves for the summer. She’s been extra careful about her phone and now never leaves it around. But strangely she is acting sweeter toward me than ever. I’ve never had so much PDA and baked goods, what’s up with that?

It hasn’t happened yet, but it’s like seeing a wrecking ball arc toward a building: there is time before it happens, but it will definitely happen.

In any case, any ideas for a good way to break this off with a bang?

Me: “Your operating assumption from this point forward should be that she will cheat with him if they ever get together. And that she is completely untrustworthy.”

Called it. Am I good or what?

I’m not surprised that she is piling on the PDA and feminine sweetness now that her gig is about to blow up. I wrote about this phenomenon in this post about a girl whose best fuck I had with her occurred the day before we broke up.

The afternoon before the breakup we had the best sex ever.  She orgasmed freely.  There is something about breakup sex that brings out the animal in women.  Perhaps it is the only time they can completely sever their emotions from sex and just let their vaginas take over with a man they trust.  Or maybe it’s a last hurrah.  I felt used for my body.

I’ll add that guilt can drive a woman to feminine accommodation of the man she has cheated on, or is thinking of cheating on. Particularly if she has had second thoughts and decided that you are a higher value male than the long distance lover. Anyhow, the way I would initiate breakup sequence is with maximum pain and humiliation inflicted. By that I mean, get caught fucking another girl. When your beloved lashes out in fury and anguish, calmly reply:

“I thought you were OK with this. After all, this chick isn’t the only whore I’m fucking.”

***

Email #3:

Hey…..I’ve been a long time reader of yours and wanted to ask a quick q. – I apologize if you have addressed this issue already…I just couldn’t locate the relevant post. Anyhoo here goes:

When a girl you are flirting with mentions/boasts about previous erotic encounters with alphas  e.g “And then I met this total hottie in Paris who blew my mind” or “This reminds me of that argentinean tango dancer I had a fling with once”, how is one supposed to respond? Should it be completely ignored or should one maybe try to counterattack by casually mentioning real or even fictitious encounters with hot girls?

Thanks for your time

D

Classic beta bait. Subconsciously, this is one ploy that a girl will use to take the measure of your manhood. If you show any indignation, hurt, or jealousy, you fail. If you attempt to counterattack with your own hot lover tale, you risk looking try-hard. The way to handle these “alpha male ex machina” (AMEM) shit tests is either through humor or disregard.

“And then I met this total hottie in Paris who blew my mind…”

“You slept with a gay man? Damn, must’ve been a helluva dry spell.”

—

“This reminds me of that Argentinean tango dancer I had a fling with once…”

“Wow, I’ve gotta poop.”

—

“This reminds me of that Argentinean tango dancer I had a fling with once…”

“Use em and lose em, that’s my motto too!”

—

You could parry the AMEM with an AFEM of your own, as long as you do it right. For example:

“This reminds me of that Argentinean tango dancer I had a fling with once…”

“Hey, if we’re gonna trade sex stories from our past, I’ve got a really good one for you. So there was this cute girl and her mom, and a camera hidden in the closet behind a peephole…”

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Beta Or Herb?

A running theme on this blog is the frightful sight of herbs and betas performing slow motion self-emasculations. While the herb and the beta are closely related, there are some notable differences between them.

In this post, I defined the herb:

*herb, noun – a schlumpy, nondescript white guy with no fashion sense, chin, or sexual gravitas, who has managed to hook up with a cute chick. Herbs usually wear satchels to nightclubs and button down collar shirts with the Hanes undershirt peaking through at the neck. They love anything khaki and are not embarrassed to be seen wearing fanny packs or sandals. A super herb takes it up a notch with white athletic socks and an extra-large t-shirt to hide his man boobs. They have a walk that can be best described as looking like they are carrying a load in their pants. They will annoy you just by being there. The fact that a herb will have usually managed to score a cute yuppie chick will fill you with violent feelings toward him.

You can see another great photo of a herb here. And here. And here is an example of the subspecies hipster herb.

How does a beta differ from a herb? In this post there is a photo of a beta revealing his true nature with an awkwardly placed hand on a cute girl’s shoulder. The biggest difference is that the herb usually has better *conventionally defined* success with women. The herb is not necessarily beta, though he often is. Many herbs in the city can be seen taking long romantic walks with decent looking girlfriends, defying all logic and universal laws. Herbs, therefore, have some preternatural ability to squeak out a semblance of a normal life, despite their shortcomings. Perhaps it is that they are oblivious to their self-defeating behavior, and so attract the type of women for whom dating an oblivious man suits their agenda.

Betas (and omegas), in contrast, struggle to achieve the societally-approved provider chump role to a sexless, ungrateful, Entitled American Princess. They are a more pitiable creature than the herb because their fruitless struggle often results in the stink of desperation trailing them wherever they go. The herb, to his credit, rarely reeks of desperation (until he is dumped), probably owing to the aforementioned obliviousness. Betas are more apt to look like they’re trying too hard, which is why you’ll often see better-dressed betas roaming the streets alone while schleppy herbs shuffle contentedly holding hands with their girlfriends.

In short, betas are the type of guys to spend years with internet porn and video games, while herbs are the type of guys to dutifully push strollers for kids that, unbeknownst to them, aren’t theirs. In the end, though, both betas and herbs wind up fulfilling their role as soulsucked providers to harridan wives, ensuring that the cogs of society remain greased with the sweat of their brows and the tithe of their taxes.

A few more differences between betas and herbs:

beta – dog
herb – dog in a stroller
beta – worries that wife is cheating on him
herb – has no idea wife is cheating on him
beta – wants to be alpha
herb – has no concept of the better life
beta – envious of men with hotter girfriends
herb – chastises himself for admiring classic beauty of older susan sarandon
beta – resigned
herb – compliant
beta – stymied sex drive
herb – borderline androgynous
beta – brain loaded with lies
herb – pants loaded

Reader Carol (a self-described Amazon alpha female) sent me a pic of what she termed a “beta boy”, shopping in Chicago with his girlfriend.

She wrote this about the pic:

My sister is an avid reader of your blog and she introduced me to it.  I check it out from time to time.

I see Beta Boys all over the city of Chicago. Since I got my new iphone…it only makes sense to try and snap pics of these betas. Unfortunately the iphone does not zoom.  But I’m working on this. [ed: if you’re a beta or herb, now you have more to worry about — chicks taking your photo for mockery on this blog.]

Check out this beta cubs fan wearing his girlfriend’s purse.  I had to do a freaking triple take to be sure he was not gay. No, he was wearing her purse. Following her all around the store as she flipped through racks of clothes. Mind you, this was post Cubs game…so they were probably drunk as well.

Jesus. I would never ask a man to hold my purse.  Let alone a sparkly shining number that announces to everyone your man is carrying your purse.

Yeah, this is pretty bad. For this man’s sake, let’s hope drunkenness was his excuse. It’s not even OK to hold your woman’s purse for a second so she can grab at something (let it drop to the floor or put it on a shelf if she tries to shove her purse in your hands); it’s leagues worse to take her purse and then wear it around like it’s your own, while following her like a puppy dog as she rifles through racks of discount panties. This guy looks very comfortable wearing her purse slung over his shoulder like that, as if he’s done it before.

I would classify this guy as a herb if he sees nothing wrong with this picture. Otherwise, he’s a garden variety beta asking “how high” when his girlfriend tells him to jump.

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The Most Beta Book Ever

Reader Mike sent me a media release for a book signing by a guy named James Henry (a name like that screams old-fashioned white knighter), who authored a book titled “The Laws of Love: A Guide to Gallantry“. Here is an excerpt of the release:

AS COURTSHIP DECLINES, CONCERN FOR CHIVALRY IS ON THE RISE

A New Book The Laws of Love: A Guide to Gallantry, Helps Induce Gallantry.

Book Launch and Signing:  Wednesday February 10th & Sunday, February 14th 2010

[Washington, DC] – In a time when courtship is on the decline and hedonism is on the rise, one gentleman has stood up against the tide with the power of words and seductive suggestion. Washington, DC native James Henry, an author galvanized by the decline of chivalry, announces the release of his new book, The Laws of Love: The Guide to Gallantry,with a reception and book signing on Wednesday, February 10th at ACKC chocolate shop and Saturday and Sunday of Valentine’s weekend (February 13th & 14th) at the newly opened The Tasting Room wine bars in Reston, VA and Friendship Heights.

A contemporary manual, inspired by a 19th century French love guide, gives gallant advice on the art of courtship for today’s love-starved society.

“These days with the instant nature of news and information, few people make the time to read anything in depth, so I felt that good messages could be better conveyed with fun illustrations and humorous maxims.” Consider them “inspiration to greatness” describes Henry.

Next Wednesday, February 10th, in the lead up to Valentine’s Day, Henry will officially release his new publication with a book signing at ACKC, a chocolate shop and café in Logan Circle, Washington, DC. [ed: a chocolate shop and cafe sounds like the perfect venue for a book this emasculating.]

Now I wonder why a 19th century French love guide would recommend chivalry for men? I’m trying to think about how 19th century France differed from 21st century America, but I just can’t quite put my finger on it. It’s a mystery!

I’m not an anti-chivalry crusader. If you want to be Gallant to the world’s Goofuses, go right ahead. You’ll be digging your own celibacy grave, but that’s one less competitor to me. If you live in some weird time warp American town where gallantry will help get you laid with hot babes, then be all the white knight you can be. Game is about doing what works.

But you’ll be working against the odds. Millions of men from all over the world have reached the conclusion through actual experience in the field that opening doors, throwing jackets over puddles, waiting to sit until she’s been seated first, and buying her drinks are tingle killers of the first order. Gallant doesn’t go home with the babe in 2010 America; Gallant watches perplexed as the babe thanks him for the free drink and then make outs with Gus the Inconsiderate Douchebag.

I have a hard time believing that this guy James Henry is a native of DC and still thinks gallantry is what will help men score with DC girls. Either he’s lying for fun and profit, or he’s gay.

About the only reason I could recommend chivalry as a course of action for the typical man would be if we lived in a world where nearly all men stopped indulging women, and white knighters abandoned their lances for a more cynical, self-centered calculation. With chivalry long dead, a lone knight-errant could conceivably stride onto the scene and turn girls’ heads by doing something no other man is doing. In such a scenario, where women theoretically craved the chivalric attentions of men, buying a girl a free drink might actually be good game. But I really don’t see any evidence for this happening at all in our lifetimes. Chivalry is pretty much dead as it is, and girls are still responding positively to “I don’t buy girls drinks, but you can buy me one.”

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Second Thoughts

Imagine you ignored everything you read here and proposed to your girlfriend. She accepted. Would you have second thoughts if you saw her Facebook page the next day and she had changed her profile photo to this? (hat tip: Lance Armstrong’s Molester Mustache):

The poor bastard who married this girl is in for a world of hurt. He will

NEVER

STOP

PAYING.

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