A reader sent in this most excellent compendium of game tips.
1. Ditch the cologne, a tiny bit of ladies’ perfume on the neck is the way to go. (Make sure you hug her close!) You could also put lipstick on your collar, but less is more- it has to be barely perceptible to work.
2. If you’ll be with her in a not-too-noisy venue and it’s late at night (after 11pm or so) have your phone’s alarm feature set up to ring several times at random. The hamster will wonder who the fuck is trying to get a hold you at this hour. Change the subject when she asks who’s calling.
Extra points for mixing up the ringtones.(I did this once not expecting to get it in the same night and my phone kept vibrating on the nightstand while she was riding me cowgirl- I swear I could feel her getting wetter and wetter with every “call” that came in.
3. When your body language, eye contact, etc. is solid, you can get away with ANYTHING. I’ve closed a girl having inviting her to a Warcraft LAN party and telling her how hot she’d look in a chainmail bikini. This is contrast game (Omega game?) and only works if she knows you’re joking and everythig else is congruently Alpha. I believe it’s the peacocking principle at work, though I need to experiment with it some more…
4. Remind her how Beta the other guys in the room are. I love telling a girl in a venue how thirsty I am and asking if she’ll fish me a gin and tonic off the two nerds at the end of the bar. There are all sorts of subtle ways to DLV your competition, get creative!
5. Never miss an opportunity to grab her hair and give it a good tug- she’ll let you do it waaay sooner in the interaction than societal norms would suggest, (about 15 seconds in if you’re dirty dancing.)
6. Act aroused by her shit tests. The whole “You’re so hot when you’re being bitchy” mentality makes her resistance self-defeating. Even better if you’re funny about it.
7. When shit-tested via text message, reply with an ascii penis. [Ed: It looks like this: 8==>. Or this, if you’re a host of the Chateau: 8=======================>] Hasn’t failed me yet and its cheaper than sending picture messages of the real thing.
8. Anything that attracts attention to your crotch is a good thing, eye-catching and unusual belt buckles are good. When you catch her glancing down you can remind her that it’s not going to suck itself.
9. And finally – My all time super duper favorite-ist opener in the whoooole wide world:
“Did you just grab my ass?”
And no, she doesn’t have to be standing behind you for it to work, you can walk clear across the room and spit this. (My inspiration for that one came from the club owner in Night at the Roxbury)
Caveat Emptor: these are all situational and can backfire if applied incorrectly. Know your prey and calibrate! #1 and #2 are best reserved for the divas who are on the fence about you
A final thought- once you have a basic competency in game, the only way to keep growing is to start tailoring your style to match your personality and strengths and have fun with it. A cheeky/playful Austin Powers vibe does wonders for me, not exactly your boilerplate stoic Alpha was he?
Feel free to use all or part of this for your blog, as a former pedastalizer myself, I have tremendous empathy for my beta bros sloggin it out in the trenches.
Your truly,
-Marshy
The force is strong in this one. #1 and #7 are especially good.

very good stuff
LikeLike
Should be some easy pickins of desperate, single women this weekend. Go get some.
LikeLike
I used to use scented girlly lotion way back in the day Before Game for this exact reason. Girls LOVE that you’ve got other women, and stuff like some lotion hints you’ve been in close proximity with other women–that gets the hamster going big time!
It’s funny how much I understood this stuff before there was a community. Another one I came up with…
You can’t get the hottie until you appease the nottie.
In other words you’ve got to win over the group and disarm the obstacles before you’ll be able to pull your target. If you don’t then you risk getting cockblocked.
LikeLike
c=======================3 also works.
LikeLike
@Jet
I prefer 8==> because in English, we read left to right, and therefore the 8==> version implies the penis is pointing at the reader (the female) whereas your version implies that the penis is pointing back at the person who sent it.
LikeLike
#5 ALWAYS, ALWAYS, ALWAYS gets a good reaction.
LikeLike
3============D that’s how you do a dick, why are yours pointy?
LikeLike
I personally like #6 quite a bit, for it comes from an indomitable frame. However, as you said, the caveat emptor applies–calibration is everything. One would want to avoid rewarding a woman for shit tests, unless you’re 100% confident of being able to handle ALL shit tests with aplomb.
LikeLike
()()========D
LikeLike
B(o) (o)Bs
LikeLike
^
||
w
LikeLike
LOL, that last one didn’t work as well as I was hoping it would. Bad font for it, I guess.
LikeLike
any touch of her hair = major gina tingles, i’ve found
LikeLike
8======D is the best
LikeLike
ITT: ascii penises
LikeLike
8##########D ~ ~ ~ O:
LikeLike
8==========D (i)
LikeLike
I’ve heard that that night is one of the best times to go out looking for vulnerable women. I’ve never tried it, but I’m doing it this time.
Anyone have tips on what kind of place to go where dateless women drink or any other suggestions?
LikeLike
I can vouch for 1, 2 and 3 above.
#1:
Years ago, I was in the habit of shagging a gf, then heading out to the crowded bar afterwards. Women would look at me strange, when they saw the tousled hair, disheveled look and then would get the sexual/female aroma – it drove them wild.
On a date with a hot chic, we were near a group of loud inebriated college kids from NYU. She stepped away to use the restroom. The party kids got up to leave and a chic approaches me to say, “Hey, wanna be my date for a Dorm Party, right now”. I said I’d pass on that. Then she gives me a full on kiss, with tongue, and says, “Did that change your mind?”. When I told her it didn’t she left. My date comes back and is furious, as she see smeared lipstick on my face. I just said, “Get used to it, this kind of thing happens a lot”. We ended up having sex twice that evening, and for the next week.
After that I made a mental note of always winking at waitresses in restaurants, as they approached our table – so they would usually be smiling at me when they arrived – to add to my date’s sexual tension.
#2:
On a second date with a hot chic, got a call from another gf, wanting to reschedule for that evening. I just say, “I’ve got company right now… we’ll talk later” Then when she persisted, “I said later, bye!” and hung-up. She called me right back, and I turned off the phone, and said to the date, “Now where were we?”. The date, eyes wide, says, “Who was that?” I looked directly at her and said, “My sister”. Her eyes burned, as she knew I was bold faced lying to her. Intimacy ensued sooner than expected with her. My other gf, had a similar reaction and need to show her affection too. So win-win all around.
LikeLike
nom nom nom
LikeLike
A few months ago I was talking to the owner of a bar. She told me a story about a hot chick who was in the bar on V-day a couple of years back. Apparently this girl had just moved to town and was pretty lonely.
Long story short, she ended up banging the first guy who bothered to spend more than five minutes talking to her.
Where did they have sex?
In the bathroom.
I live walking distance to this and dozens of bars. Might have to get off my ass on Monday night and see what’s going down….
LikeLike
Eight. Equals. Equals. Greater than.
Now thats what I call an Alpha Emoticon. Beats the shit out of smiley faces, sad faces and lolz.
LikeLike
The valentine’s day single girl thing.
a week or two before I started reading this blog, on a previous V-day night, in the city, consistent with your story, a girl who asked my friends about me “is he single”, approached me, started a conversation with me, and then threw in an obligatory shit test “I can fuck really well.” I failed.
It was akin to being on a sinking ship. Like, “I had a freebie and now it’s lost interest. boo!”
Hopefully, we all know better now.
LikeLike
@Good Luck Chuck:
That’s what I’m talking about. That was me asking the question up there about where to go to look for prey on Monday.
I’m thinking places without restaurants where couples would go to celebrate the big day: Irish bars, neighborhood bars (depending on the neighborhood), hipster dives, etc.
I plan on starting on an Irish joint across the street from a courthouse in suburban DC (big fucking hint for the locals), then working my way into town to other places around another suburban courthouse via cab, then into DC proper depending on what happens. Really I’m just looking to practice my game and do some reconnaissance, but if something pops that’s fine.
I figure the first couple places must have some unmarried/boyfriendless female lawcunts getting a few after work drinks that would be easy to game. Or at least easy to warm up with before moving on to other places.
LikeLike
the thought of walking up to a girl from across the room and asking her if she just grabbed your ass made me lol.
LikeLike
@Malcolm,
If your on any of the online dating site – this is the time to press to meet also, probably the night before Valentine’s Day is best, as you can press your cause, and if it doesn’t work, still have V-day to go on the hunt.
LikeLike
damn, to be an alpha cause I’d think you’d have to be pretty damn congruent to pull this off (not as bad as apocalypse opener, of course).
her: “um, no?”
armchair alpha “uh why not?”
her: “um, I’ll be right back.”
LikeLike
Yeah but what if you’ve been dating a girl for only like a month. What is an alpha way to acknowledge this bullshit faux holiday.
LikeLike
@Kurtis
Get her a fake cloth flower, but make sure it isn’t a rose or carnation.
LikeLike
I’m taking a girl out on the Sunday for the first time. I want same night lay. Advise?
LikeLike
@Good Luck Chuck,
I was seeing this hot chic and on V-day I went to pick her up at her place. I gave her the “too busy at work” excuse for why I had no V-day card or gift.
Her eyes moistened a little, and I didn’t acknowledge, just said, “Hurry up and get ready”. As she did, I opened the card and 3 gifts she had for me – all neatly wrapped mind you.
She came out of her bedroom looking radiant, and we headed to this diner for V-day dinner. We sat down in the booth, and after we ordered, she said,
“Oooh I’m feeling chilly!” (quizzical look)
Me: “Well, I guess you need a hug then?” (leaning over)
Her: “My legs are cold…” (places my hand on her thigh)
I then run my warm hand all the way up her thigh, and notice no panties
She: (beaming at me) “I want you to take me!”
Me: “Now?”
She: “Yes, in the bathroom… it’s my little fantasy”
Happy memories…
LikeLike
Marshy for PREZ!
LikeLike
Malcolm Tucker
The bar I mentioned was a hipsterish Irish pub.
I’d say you’re right on the money. Hit the places where a woman is going to make herself very approachable. A woman sitting alone at a neighborhood bar is just asking to get picked up.
A few years ago I went out with my buddy and a chick he was banging at the time. She brought a friend. I remember this chick wasn’t really doing it for me so instead of playing along I got irritated at her lame attempts to
seduceprovoke me and made it pretty clear that I wasn’t interested. The next bar we went to she broke away to hit on some other dude.Should be easy pickin’s for anyone who wants to put in at least a token effort.
LikeLike
6. Act aroused by her shit tests. The whole “You’re so hot when you’re being bitchy” mentality makes her resistance self-defeating. Even better if you’re funny about it.
I use this all the time. Works great. You just have to be willing to take it further than her. The first few times she’ll try to escalate until you capitulate. The angrier she gets the hotter it makes you. Stick to it even if she eventually blows her top and slaps you. “Goddam baby! So sexy! Hit me again!” as you grab her butt and tits while grinding your crotch into her hip. She’ll give in eventually. Particularly if she thinks you’re about to embarass her in public. Remember it’s her fault since she won’t stop.
If you ever give in once, you’re screwed.
LikeLike
@Kurtis:
Sorry to post twice, I just thought this one was better. Insted of the cloth flower, get her one of those fake flowers with the plastic stem and the cheap, waxy Hershey’s Chocolate flower part.
LikeLike
I just realized that tomorrow night I am going out with my buddy, his girl, her sister from out of town, and a couple of other girls.
No idea what the sister looks like or how old she is but everything points to my buddy’s girl trying to set us up (she’s late 30’s with a nice face and a perfect body) with her sister. I’m betting that all three of the tagalongs are single.
This could be interesting. The dynamics of male/female relations obviously change a bit around holidays, especially v-day. Since it falls on Monday this year I’m betting that the bitch shields are going to be down this entire weekend.
LikeLike
That Guy is a better troll than GBFM.
LikeLike
Way to have HER lead the “take her” fantasy, champ.
Y’know this is the sort of thing that requires a waiting period between stimulus and response, so that you can at least create the illusion of doing it of your own accord.
(Not saying your little bathroom fuck wasn’t satisfying — but it certainly was less satisfying for her because she had to have that much agency.
“Now?” –> Ugh. Don’t ever do that again, for the love of sweet god.
It’s like with dogs — the ability to connect stimulus and response only works over a short period of time. Actually sort of miraculous: if she says “my fantasy is X”, and you do exactly X, say, a month later, her hindbrain will actually genuinely think that you came up by it all by yourself.
Doubly amazing given women’s predilection for remembering the slightest of details in just about every relationship-related situation imaginable.
LikeLike
“Winking”? To create sexual tension? Yeah, this is where I call bullshit.
Next thing you know, you’ll be talking dirty talk as awful as this right here.
sigh
LikeLike
ritmo,
You may be right… but i like to mix it up, and be unpredictable, sometimes spontaneous, sometimes stagnant.
In either case, a week after that she broached the topic of a 3-some, involving her and a gf of hers – which never got off the ground, as her gf was only about a 6, and didn’t do it for me.
LikeLike
I’ve been reading this blog since 2009 and a question that has been on my mind for some time is how much of the stuff on this blog(not just this post) will work on non american women? Like English as a second language. A woman that came here less than 5 years ago from another country.
LikeLike
fourblindmonkeys,
I dated tons of foreign chics, and everything will work except humor. Jokes need to be simple if verbal, best to use gestures and “body english”.
OTOH, Scandinavians and Dutch speak English almost as good as natives. Germans are mixed, and younger Eastern Europeans are typically learning English as a second language these days, in preference to German, so are passable.
The biggest exception are the French, they almost refuse to learn English, and even when they can speak it fairly well, they still put on that ridiculous accent 😉
Of course the other thing is that humor is so different in other places. Your probably familiar with British humor, and that will work for Scandinavians too. Dutch, Germans and Central Europeans prefer simpler, cruder stuff. Polish prefer more slapstick humor. French prefer obscure, non-sequitur kind of offbeat, wacky stuff.
LikeLike
OK
I just finished doing another Financial Services Professional ckick in the parking lot of a shanky gay-bar in the Montrose. Finished before the cops arrived…good.
But here is what is really interesting: Right after she came and right after I yanked a fist-sized chunk of dyed blonde hair off her head she lost all control and mumbled – “Buy Gold”
LikeLike
@Cauthon
“That Guy is a better troll than GBFM.”
What the fuck? Give up your Old Spice to impress desoulled buttexed urinals? Game over man!!
LikeLike
Here’s some Skittle, babe… bring da movies!
LikeLike
From the Australian blogger: Roissy is “sometimes amusing, sometimes frightening, often informative”. New tagline?
LikeLike
[…] This post was mentioned on Twitter by billy tooberish, English Made Fun. English Made Fun said: http://www.schoolzen.com Valentine's Day Tips « Citizen Renegade: OTOH, Scandinavians and Dutch speak English almost as… http://bit.ly/i9HLd1 […]
LikeLike
ascii penis:
(((l l)))
((l l))
(l l)
l l
l l
l l
l l
l l
l l
l l
l…l
( )
\../
l
l
l
l
l
l
LikeLike
ok, that didn’t work for shit.
LikeLike
well played…maybe try to make a 4chan triforce next time
LikeLike
@peckerwood
I hate that feeling. I hate the full proof guarantee, if only you didn’t say what you just said. It sucks.
@ Malcolm Tucker
You can’t go to bars hoping to find the easiest girl. When you focus your efforts on the hottest girl, everyone else will be watching.
LikeLike
@peckerwood
then threw in an obligatory shit test “I can fuck really well.” I failed.
lol, what did you say?
LikeLike
Fellow men, I need advice fast if any of you can help me out that would be cool. I was with Girl 1 at the the bar with my friends last night, been seein her for a couple of weeks. My game was not strong last night and she was being ridiculous, so I left and met up with Girl 2 and we smashed. While we’re banging, My roommate yells at me through my door to see if I’m awake, I respond and then hear Girl 1, who decided to drop by, say “o that figures” and storms out of the house.
Girl 1 is a keeper, how should I go about salvaging this?
LikeLike
I didn’t do anything stupid, we were already sitting next to each other outside, talking about stuff…not quite “chitchat” game, but like “…you’re polish, so am I,” (I guess it’s comfort building stage) not really teasing. Anyway, she said it and I thought I did what you’re supposed to do, make a psuedo shock face, and say “umm…ok.” Memory fails me but I might have added, “You want to get out of here?” or “where do you live?”
But that was definitely a turning point.
LikeLike
Slacker…
That’s almost perfect game right there.
LikeLike
8==========> Gonna do that!:)
LikeLike
Ascii penis? Lame. Are you actually twelve?
Most women are not attracted to men’s crotches, but to the rest of their body (faces, chests, arms, fashion markers like eyeliner or tattoos). Therefore, drawing attention to your crotch seems– not tacky, exactly, but rather pointless.
I think the point about calibration is VERY important: while many women want what they can’t have, your more insecure woman will simply conclude that you hate her and wander off to drown her sorrows in ice cream.
Adjusting game for personality is also very important. I think making yourself more seductive is less about becoming Cliche Alpha Dude #5, and more about becoming your best self: confident, funny, entertaining, but still you.
“Did you just grab my ass?” or “get that guy over there to buy me a drink”, if delivered with a smile and proper timing, might be hilarious; and hilarious is an aspect of game even drama-free insecure 6’s like myself appreciate.
The hair thing would turn me on, but that might be because my scalp is one of my major erogenous zones; I have no evidence about how well it would work on other women.
I remain puzzled why men date women who do this “shit test” business.
LikeLike
I remain puzzled why men date women who do this “shit test” business.
I risk a lot in giving a woman a logical answer, but 6’s are a bit more down to earth so here goes…
The more male interest a woman has, the more rigorous her weeding process must be. The hotter the girl, the harder she tests.
LikeLike
The women’s perfume thing – I used to always wear my father’s cologne when I was a teenager.
I much preferred the masculine scents to ladies’ sweet and flowery perfumes.
I also think ladies’ aromas smell better on guys bodies – I think it has to do with the chemistry mix. It tends to tone down the sweetness and floweriness a notch or 2 and actually make it smell good.
—
You might be onto something new in mens’ grooming.
LikeLike
In addition to the above, go to your local health food store and by “patchouli oil” – its a natural essence.
Its a flowery South Asian scent, but on a male its musky undertones surface and smells REALLY GOOD.
Its natural too – no chemicals, so its good for you and Im sure women notice as its not a common aroma.
LikeLike
And some of us actually learn to love the abuse. Just like I grab my girl’s ass to remind myself of how much I like it, she squeezes my dominance muscles to remind herself of how much she loves being with a strong-willed man. She does that by shit testing me and then enjoying being put her in her place. And I like putting her there. Win-win, really.
LikeLike
C– It makes sense that they’d test men; even I used to test men (for traits like non-douchebaggery and geekdom), even though I was usually done with the process by week two of knowing them. But it seems obnoxious to give someone a hard time to find out whether they would let you get away with it, and also not particularly helpful as a date-sorting tool, since it would leave you with a lot of pushy assholes.
LikeLike
CobraGirl said:
ALL women do this “shit test” business. It is encoded in every fibre of their DNA. This includes you, whether you admit it or not. Or, more likely, whether you know it or not.
LikeLike
For #2, make sure you only do this on a girl who doesn’t know you’ve ever cheated.
My girl knows I’ve cheated on her and the other night another girl kept calling me while we were together. My girl freaked out and was convinced I was still fucking the other girl. I’m not still fucking the other girl, and I didn’t arrange for this to happen; it was just more stress in my life. Hell, I was giving a talk in front of 50 people during the period she thinks I was banging the other girl.
Only pull #2 on a girl who isn’t too insecure about your fidelity.
LikeLike
So today I was talking with this bitch and she brought up music (college girls like to talk about this a lot) and asked what I listened to. Given that I am not a slave sheep beta bitch, I responded that I listened to black metal and listed off some of my favourite bands. Black metal is the genre of the ubermensch, the true alpha, the man who throws off the chains of the slave morality and aspires to true power. Anyway, the bitch said something about not dating satanists (I’m an atheist) and wandered off. Will this make it more “taboo” and make it easier for me to get with her? Like how it’s easier to get a girl to cheat with you? What do you guys think? Should I pretend to be a member of a whacky religion to get with this girl? She’s like 9/10 very intelligent and attending the same prestigious college as me.
LikeLike
I love the second one. How do I email Roissy? I cant find a link on the site.
LikeLike
I think Marshy and Chateau are the same person…
LikeLike
@ cobragirl
Shit tests are a very instinctual thing, most women don’t necessarily do them on purpose. It’s much akin to a child trying to see what they can get away with, or if you’ve ever watched the behavior of a rowdy puppy- they don’t know there are boundaries until they are told by their master. They’re testing the waters and exploring the world. Same thing with shit tests, women are testing where their men’s boundaries are and exploring their men at the same time. In one of roissy’s older posts, he says that having a dog is great training for having a girlfriend, and truer words have never been spoken
LikeLike
Off Topic:
What do you do when you have lost the desire to game and seduce american women ? I’m fucking serious.
I live in the bay area where unfortunately it’s mostly white and asian women, both of which I simply do not get boners for.
This seriously concerns me because I am in a phase in my life right now where my inner game is strong due to a variety of factors. Basically, I am jonesing to approach and seduce but frankly, I look at most girls (mainly from a day-game perspective) and I am not inspired.
The way they walk (they have no sense of grace), the way they dress ( frankly just downright terrible or corny mall trendy), what they talk about ( vapid celebrity culture).
Whenever, I come across Euros and S American women, it’s like 10 shots of testosterone were injected into my veins and I become a lion in the sahara. Unfortunately, this literally happens once maybe twice a month ? Not enough imo.
Any tips ?
LikeLike
Here are the Bay Area census stats:
RACE
White 3,941,687 58.1%
Black or African American 511,084 7.5%
Asian 1,289,849 19.0%
Hispanic or Latino 1,315,175 19.4%
Black White and Asians take up 70 % of the women’ races which I am basically for the most part not attracted to at all.
I am srsly fucked. I am down to game latinas but out of those you have the tubby ones which are no go for me, or the ones that are straight ghetto also no go. These stats are depressing. Btw if you have yellow fever come to the Bay, it’s like shooting fish in a barrel.
LikeLike
@julian As a college student I see a lot of american women just go to fucking shit after college. For white women 25 year olds look like 40 year olds. If they don’t look like porn stars they look frumpy, lumpy, and unfuckable. Euros and S American women are skinny and have some sexyness.
I live in the midwest and went to a bar where all the “young” people go and was depressed that everyone looks old enough to be my dad because they don’t take care of their bodies.
American food is just shit though. High fat, sugars, and sodium age the body fast. They don’t have they shit in south america and the Euros outlaw high sugars and high sodium food. Hate on their socialism but they make sure their ladies aren’t fucking american cows.
My recommendation: move or find a good looking white girl. I don’t find sexual attraction to girls most guys would rate a 10. But I’ve dated some 6’s that I’ve loved so much they felt like 11’s.
LikeLike
@julian
MOVE!!
LikeLike
I swear this post is getting printed and stored in my memory for later use.!
@Julian i feel your dilemma, I myself have been like that for many weeks, I am glad to hear im not the only one who notices American womens faults to the point whereby I don’t even want to hit that ass after five minutes of conversation. My advice to you would be to look for more ethnic clubs or areas of your city and day game if its possible. You could do what I’m doing monday with a friend, being moral support/wingman at a speed dating event and practice/refine your game on desperate and hopefully drunk women. Maybe you’ll find a jewel in a pile of shit.
On a side note I do believe I have the honour of being the first person to pen a reply at the Chateau on a Kindle……
LikeLike
@ That Guy # on February 11, 2011 at 9:16 pm
“”OTOH, Scandinavians and Dutch speak English almost as good as natives. ”
You do realize native speakers speak English well, not ‘good’?
Love how you’re comparing English as a second language to native speakers, yet you screw that up. Nice.
LikeLike
@anon
yep, if fatfuck syndrome doesn’t start earlier at home due to shit parenting, it starts in college. poor eating habits, crap foods, drinking, and nobody forcing them to do otherwise starts the downhill spiral. the effects often don’t catch up until after graduation, when many get office jobs where they’re sitting on their asses all day.
agreed about american food. the best thing to do is to avoid processed foods as much as possible. this pretty much rules out fast food, junk food snacks, pastries, etc. i swear, during processing they must be injecting shit that makes you want to keep eating more and more of it. really nasty.
men age like wine and women age like milk. this is mother nature’s way of enforcing a balance that feminists are trying desperately to upheave.
from my observations, black women age the best. whites stay young looking for the least amount of time. asians hold on for a few years longer, but both go to shit very quickly after they hit their peaks.
LikeLike
Patchouli oil — are you insane?
The only people who wear patchouli oil are dirty hippies who don’t bathe or change their clothes but need something strong to mask their stink.
Patchouli oil stink = “I smoke way too much pot.”
No way will it help you with hot girls.
LikeLike
@itsme, anon
Well put. The freshman 15 is standard operating procedure for a ton of the girls here in college, its depressing on many levels, mostly due to the fact that it shrinks the pool of girls I find attractive.
Anon: Couldn’t agree more on the midwestern twenty something girls. During the summer back in my hometown (biggest city in the state) I turned 21 and would go out with some high school buddies to the local bars and the selection was pitiful. There were always tons of former hotties that were 20+ lbs overweight with the characteristic fat that sits on the waistline/hips area and upper arm flab. Not exactly boner inspiring. The fact that most girls look like this around here probably doesn’t help as that makes them feel normal so they don’t try to work it off.
The chicks who were fit were a prized commodity and they knew it, and more often than not they were surrounded by a posse of mother hens and orbiter LJBFs so good luck with that anyone who wants to try opening that.
LikeLike
For those asking what to do if they’re spending VD with a LTR:
Step 1: Get something cheap, but unique-ish (quality chocolates work well).
Step 2: Use a talent you have to write(poem)/sing(mix-tape)/portray(video) something cute.
Step 3: When VD arrives, don’t give her these things. When she brings it up, say you forgot. Let anger ensue.
Step 4: The day after, give her your gifts.
Step 5: Enjoy the best sex you’ve ever had in your life.
LikeLike
@David Rockefeller
Patchouli oil — are you insane?
That’s why you dont ever ever take advise from “a woman”.
LikeLike
If not Patchouli then any other natural scent with flowery overtones will do.
While flowery tones are overkill on a woman, on a man the man’s body chemistry tend to tone down the floweriness or sweetness and bring out the musky undertones.
Tube rose is a good, pure flowery aroma that mixes well with male body chemistry.
Women would do better with sticking to purely musky scents because their female body chemistry will bring out sweet undertones, and men are better to stick to sweet scents, their natural male body chemistry will bring out the musky undertones.
So you’ll have a scent that smells simultaneously feminine and masculine.
Sandalwood is both sweet AND musky – so its good for both sexes.
Go to your local health food store and experiment with the natural oils there.
LikeLike
The thing about vday is that a million other guys have the same idea. Go to bar to meet single girls, right? No, wrong! You’ll have twice if not triple the ratio of guys to girls in a club and bitch shields galore since guys are molesting them left and right. Happy gaming. Hot girls stay home on vday or bang their boyfriends.
LikeLike
[…] I guess protest is beta – the inimitable Roissy printed a reader email advocating insurgency tactics to use the romantic hype of the holiday against itself: 1. Ditch the cologne, a tiny bit of […]
LikeLike
Nothing says Valentine’s Day versus the Hamster like Tidy Cats kitty litter… Multiple Strength for Multiple Cats.
LikeLike
8======> ()
8======> ()
8======>()
8======)
8====)
8==)
8)
LikeLike
1 is gold. I also like 4.
4 is silver.
LikeLike
[…] Blogger Badger wrote a Valentine’s Day Follow-Up post that linked to a recent discussion of “insurgency tactics” to use on Valentine’s Day. I thought the whole list sounded pretty damned effective, but […]
LikeLike
[…] Blogger Badger wrote a Valentine’s Day Follow-Up post that linked to a recent discussion of “insurgency tactics” to use on Valentine’s Day. I thought the whole list sounded pretty damned effective, but […]
LikeLike