A reader emails:
Really loved the “it’s complicated” post, and have found lots of versatile use for it in my life. Thinking about it though, I think it’s most effective with women new to you as opposed to women you have history with. I also don’t think it should be used as a text response. Some of my ex’s will hit me up out of the blue via text, usually playful messages, but sometimes with the direct inquiry “are you seeing anyone?” that only a woman (or clueless beta orbiter) would ask. While “it’s complicated” would now be my default response to a new girl at a bar if she asked the same, I think it sounds too defensive and pandering to an ex, as though you’re trying to hide something from someone who already knows you very well. [Ed: Agreed.] I also think it doesn’t have the same effectiveness if used as a text reply to anyone.
I went with this exchange recently:
aspirational ex-girlfriend: Are you seeing anyone?
(next morning) me: you workin for tmz now?
Good answer. Cocky and funny, jes like da ladeez like it. She also appreciates the haphazard attention to punctuation.
“Are you seeing anyone?” is a common enough question from interested women that the proper handling of it deserves its own post. (Rumor has it there are a lot of sniveling gameless betas who ask women this question when they first meet them. Pitiable creatures.)
If an ex-girlfriend, former fuckbuddy or platonic female friend who you think wants to revisit the good times with you, (or who simply wants to segue from friendship to sex), asks if you are seeing anyone, and you have decided that “it’s complicated” is not the best response, there are alternatives at your disposal.
1. Sincerity
“I’ve been dating someone for a bit, but I can’t say for sure she is the one.”
2. Lying
“No.”*
3. Evasion/Reframing
See: the reader’s reply above. Few women will follow-up an expertly delivered evasion with cunty lawyerly argumentation. This is because women who ask such questions don’t really want to know the unvarnished answer. The question is asked only to give them plausible deniability should they find themselves bedding a taken man.
4. Circumspection
“I’m dating around.”
This is my favorite answer, regardless of its accuracy. First, it shuts down further inquiry. Second, it leaves things open to interpretation.
5. Challenge
“I’m not tied down yet.”
6. Agree & Amplify
“One?”
7. Aloofness
“Nothing serious.”
Also a personal favorite. Girls like to think the guys they desire have no worries about meeting and banging women, or about settling down.
*”No” is not the ideal reply. Because of the power of preselection, you run a better chance of losing her interest if she thinks you are completely single than you do if she thinks you are getting pussy regularly. So even if you aren’t seeing anyone, you should massage your answer so that ambiguity is introduced to the dialectic. Women aren’t put off a man’s scent if he is seeing someone; if anything, they become more like a bloodhound on his trail. The only exception is when the man sings odes of love and devotion to his woman. Competitor women will generally** back off if they see that the man they want is truly, deeply in love with someone else.
**Before the fairy dust, pie in the sky, swoon brigade gets all gushy at this optimistic outlook on the female gender, let me remind the studio audience that I have observed, and experienced, plenty of exceptions to this rule.
Replies that you should avoid:
“Define ‘seeing’.”
Too goofy. Chicks don’t dig the goof.
“Not sure.”
Too indecisive. Chicks don’t dig vacillators.
“Well, I’m fucking someone, if that’s what you mean.”
Too visual and sexual. Chicks don’t dig braggarts.
“I’m married.”
Too final. Chicks need a window of opportunity.
“Aren’t you the nosy one?”
Too slippery and awkward. What are you hiding?
“Wouldn’t you like to know.”
Too abrasive. If she’s an ex who knows you well, this albeit funny line will close off further exploration.
“Why do you ask?”
Too defensive. Also, why would you step on her hamster right as its revving up for a glorious rationalization to sleep with you?
Commenters are available during business hours to help you with further suggestions.
How about:
Occasionally
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I like “I’m dating around” for situations in which you don’t have a gf or fuck buddy; and “I’m not tied down yet” for situations in which you do.
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All solid.
I can vouch for the effectiveness of “Nothing serious”, it’s a real bunker buster, destroying the confines of the hamster and letting it run wild and free.
Anytime I’ve used this, within the next one or two texts she will want to meet up for drinks.
It’s incredibly easy after this since they have already set themselves up as the ones doing the chasing.
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bring the movies
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Or…. maybe yes, maybe no, maybe go fuck yourself.
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I’m seeing everyone.
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“Are You Seeing Anyone?”
My answer is:
Well, I know for sure I am being watched.
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for an ex, I think “why is that important to you” can be effective if delivered correctly
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true story:
her text: ““Are You Seeing Anyone?””
me: ” not reeely no it’s mostly dark when we hang out zlzozlzozolzozo”
i licked her fine gina three nites later and this time i left the ligths on zlzolzozl
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what about “maybe”
one word game y’all!
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Firepower is sick of Game
requiring Shakespearian rewrites
– to achieve perfection of delivery
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I used the “One?” response a week ago when a bartendress asked me that very question. For me, my answer is directly correlated to how long it takes the gal to ask it.
If she asks it right away (within 5 minutes, let’s say), I’m going to Agree & Amplify, whereas if it’s someone who has known me for awhile (say, a year, as in the case of one gal I’m seeing now but didn’t notice in my life until she started contact with me), then I’m more likely to try to Challenge her.
The 5 minute gal is showing signs of interest immediately, so you need to let the flames stoke themselves. The 1 year gal did a bad job of showing interest, but is doing so now, so I need to reverse shit test them so they vomit out enough clues for me to see what they want exactly. A gal who needs a rebound versus a crazy fanatic who has had a long term crush but was too weak to display any desire before.
The bartendress, for what it’s worth, asked it after about 15 minutes of meeting me, but less than 5 minutes of actual conversation since she was working and I was ignoring her unless she talked to me. Going out with her tonight.
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“Are you seeing anyone?”
Read this for what it is; a very common shit test. Think of how the average male (see beta) would answer this. The base impulse of an uneducated chump would be to reply with an enthusiastic “No”, usually followed by chirpings of hopeful dating at the prospect of a girl who’s showing overt interest.
That’s the common response and precisely the shit test failure she’s hoping you’ll avoid. You see women’s native language is covert and psychological – innuendo, body language, visual cues, subcommunication, subtlety, etc. When a woman resorts to overt communication, the language of Men – “are you seeing anyone” – it means what she wants to communicate is so important to her that there can be no mistake in what she conveys.
A chump will happily respond with a “no” because he wants her to feel comfortable in her (perceived) attraction to him, thus increasing his chances with her. This only telegraphs his optionless status her. The challenge of this shit test lies in the subcommunication, “are you Alpha enough to avoid looking desperate in light of my obvious attraction?”
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I’ve always liked to go vague and ambiguous with this answer, especially when I was seeing a girl nobody knew about. A Well-placed “Maybe” or “Not Necessarily” always works for me, either they leave it at that or probe a little more, and I’l give a paper thin, kinda sorta -eh, not really. My favorite response though, is: Don’t worry about it.
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Also this post in itself rocks. Chateau admits that “chicks don’t dig vacillators” but on the other hand recommends tottering statements like “I’ve been dating someone for a bit, but I can’t say for sure she is the one”.
[Editor: Sincerity is an option, but it isn’t the best option. Rollo had the right comment. This is a shit test, and should be treated as such. She wants to know the man has options, is availing himself of those options, and won’t jump like a horny rabbit at her should she show him some sexual attention.]
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Rollo,
I’ve often been asked “What do you like to do for fun?” Is this similar to “Are you seeng anyone?” What is being subcommunicated here (besides the obvious)? What is a good response?
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@ Ovid
“What do you like to do for fun?”
What is a good response?
“Girls.”
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what’s the best response if an ex asks “have you been sleeping around”?
Can you treat that question the same as “are you seeing anyone”?
[Editor: “Does camping count?”]
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@ovid,
Go cocky/funny.
“Full-time barfly”
“I’m currently working on bringing peace to the middle-east. And you?”
“Stopsign proofreader”
You can also go serious, say you like to travel, and then launch into a funny story about your latest international adventure.
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@Al
Sorta, but she has mildly insulted you.
Go with the hard stare/uncomfortable pause, then “Agree and Amplify”.
“Never the same mattress twice”
*wink*
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Great Post!
This can get tricky to answer or “pass” if you will, depending on a girl you are with
I have found that to pretty much any other question you want to avoid answering you can just say “Eventually…” This does a few things – keeps her interested, maintains mystery, and demonstrates your higher value, because now SHE HAS TO QUALIFY to you, be good, etc to find out the answer…
ie:
Chick: How much you make?
Dude: You’ll find out…. Eventually
____________________________
Chick: What do you do for a living?
Dude: You’ll find out… Eventually
if she is being too persistent, you can turn the tables around further, and say “why is this important to you?” but I would avoid that as that’s very defensive
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“nothing mature”
Or is that too much of a try-hard clever play on “nothing serious”?
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@Al
what’s the best response if an ex asks “have you been sleeping around”?
“night and day.”
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@ Blessent mon coeur
“nothing mature”
Or is that too much of a try-hard clever play on “nothing serious”?
If you feel okay about implying that you are immature – I would probably not do that. If you want to go with this approach, try something like “not exclusively”.
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I was at a party a couple of weeks ago and this half drunk chick asked me “do you have a girlfriend?”
Bare in mind I had a good buzz going and replied without thinking ” I have many girlfriends”
She had a good laugh at it and wanted for me to get in touch with her.
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If a girl is being really cunty I like to ask if they have a boyfriend, just to set up the … “oh… surprising…”
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Was this a good answer to the question?! well he was honest about it……
http://www.sportspickle.com/video/5909/pretty-rangers-fan-marrying-worst-person-ever
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solid work as usual by the Chateau.
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“She also appreciates the haphazard attention to punctuation.”
Ive been hearing this as a common theme lately and I while I “get it.” I’m not so sure it passes the “jumbotron test.” I do not fucking write like a 19 year old striped shirt myspace bro. I do not want anyone thinking I do. It just isn’t something I would want on the jumotron.
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Wasn’t it basic format to inflate the odds? This is a shit test, isn’t it? The basic line to use in this situation would be: I see about 4 dozen people each hour, or, no, I’m actually seeing everyone.
Or you could use the simple Waterboy (Adam Sandler) technique: I see a lot of people. I saw my mom this morning and Coach Cline earlier today.
I do like “it’s complicated” though. It has a certain mysterious ease to it. However it takes on a certain frame. Is your tone mysterious and nonchalant, or is it playful and sarcastic.
Mine is more playful and sarcastic.
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I almost always go with “She just turned 18, so it’s official, we are dating. How’s that black dude you were talking to?”
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‘ your sister’
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@OVID,
“What do you like to do for fun?” is a shit test as well, but it’s more of a personal qualifier. Most chumps have a habit of vomiting out their life’s story at the slightest prompt in an effort to bypass the uncomfortable sexual anxiety phase and move directly to a comfortable rapport because they believe the most famous of women’s canards, ” I need to be comfortable with a guy before we have sex.” They seek the fastest means to that comfort as the fastest means to her intimacy.
Poor, poor beta schlub. He hasn’t learned that it’s sexual tension and heightened anxiety that lead to arousal; never comfortable familiarity. Just ask any girl at Lake Havasu on spring break fucking a guy she met just half an hour earlier on amateur video.
The obvious subtext to the “what do you do for fun?” shit test is that no woman really cares what you do for fun. They’d much rather tell you what they like to do for fun and talk about themselves, but the test is to see how long you’ll blather about yourself. Always remember, in communication, men focus on content, women focus on context. Unless you’re an amateur secret agent, women don’t care what you like to do, but they do care very much about how you respond (context) to the question. Women want mystery, never full disclosure. Nothing is more self-gratifying for a woman than to think she’s figured you out based solely on her mythical “feminine intuition.” Don’t deny her this satisfaction by yammering away about every detail of your life in the first hour after you meet her. You’re an onion, you have layers, she’s only to be rewarded with getting to know you, never out of charity.
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Are you seeing someone?
None of them are the one. Pass the salt, please baby.
She tips her hand with whatever happens next.
If she says nothing (or changes the subject), she’s in quiet contemplation, which is good for me and good for us. Later in the evening (or on another day) the crop will be some sarcastic comment like “Thanks for making time for me, you being so busy and all.” And I reply with “It’s cool, baby” while giving a de nada wave, with equal sarcasm.
If she retorts with some shit like repeating my answer with emphasis on Them, I say “nope” with a mile – and ask for the salt again. Verbal contemplation. Good for me, good for us.
If she goes for the throat with something like “Is it anybody I know?”, I bemusedly reply “You don’t even believe that. C’mon – why don’t we just enjoy this moment. Now howbout that salt?” Once I got a cute, eye-batting “Am I the one?”. I liked that one. I just smiled and asked “Can I have the salt please, baby?” Cute contemplation – good for me and good for us.
And although they gave the impression that the conversation’s over, the seeds planted usually bumper crop later as either to-please-and-not-be-a-pain-in-the-ass demeanor, “I hate you”-type comments as I’m holding her, or being unusually almost audaciously affectionate in public.
Took me years to learn that saying as little as possible or nothing at all to shitty questions like this is a silent down-payment on a hot relationship. Admittedly these relationships don’t last very long, but the women don’t appear to be extremely motivated with that all that till death do us part stuff anymore.
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The “what do you do for fun” shit test is one I always ignore.
She: “what do you do for fun?”
Me: “Ever wonder why men have nipples? Other than the guys into BDSM. Do you keep your place tidy?”
Let them dig as much as they want, but the gold won’t be found.
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great work roissy
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Many thanks to Delusion, Insight and the incomparable Rollo.
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How about
Her: Are you seeing someone?
Me: No, but I know a woman who’d be pissed if she heard me say that.
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The standard line from Charisma Arts is “I’m seeing a few people, but nothing serious”, and it has worked well for me.
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Maybe she should just be told to mind her own business.
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Rollo–
Good comment.
Yes it’s a shit test but it’s not only that. She’s also probing for information. She also wants to know if you’re exclusively committed to some other girl.
Intermediate answers which indicate you’re in demand but aren’t committed and could maybe be won from the other girl(s) are the best. Indicating you’re an inveterate player who’s not at all likely to get serious anytime soon will also turn off some girls. The best answer is to seem in demand but looking for the right girl to get serious with, but you’re having fun and aren’t in too big a hurry to find her.
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Collegeslacker-
Pretty good turn of phrase there collegeslacker.
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Rollo–
As for the last sentence, well yeah, but that’s a rather selected subset. Not all girls are the same. They do share commonalities. Continuum of differences.
Usually 2/3 attraction=sexual tension and heightened anxiety and 1/3 DHV, comfort, get her. Must be calibrated to the girl – somewhat your early judgement about her, more your feeling her reactions.
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The genius of “yes but nothing serious” and similar like a couple of examples I gave, is that it both states that you’ve got a girl into you, and implies that you could get serious, which she’ll read as exclusive, without stating, much less promising that.
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I wonder why the reader liked the sub-par “It’s Complicated” post so much. It’s one of the easiest non-Roissy authored posts to spot on the the entire blog.
The “real” Roissy would never canvass his love life with a woman (or if he did he certainly wouldn’t cop to it on this blog.) That’s for angsty betas.
Here’s the heavy handed closing, complete with a heavy-handed anal sex joke only GBFM would laugh at.
GIRL: You’re not going to try to stick it in my ass tonight, are you?
YOU: It’s complicated.
GIRL: *swoon*
Rimshot.
Even the tone of this alleged conversation is totally unlike the the real Roissy. “So this girl that I think is cute asks me…” This is almost valleygirl-esque syntax.
Thank god those days are over. Who was writing that shit, the Rookie?
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This talk of pre-selection is a good segue to a recent online article in the economist about the psychology/evolutionary psychology of clothing labels as displays of status. Test subjects consistently labeled the status of a man based upon the designer label of his shirt:
“The answer, Dr Nelissen and Dr Meijers suspect, is the same as why the peacock with the best tail gets all the girls. People react to designer labels as signals of underlying quality. Only the best can afford them.
* * *
This study confirms a wider phenomenon. A work of art’s value, for example, can change radically, depending on who is believed to have created it, even though the artwork itself is unchanged. And people will willingly buy counterfeit goods, knowing they are knock-offs, if they bear the right label. What is interesting is that the label is so persuasive. In the case of the peacock, the tail works precisely because it cannot be faked. An unhealthy bird’s feathers will never sparkle. But humans often fail to see beyond the superficial. For humans, then, the status-assessment mechanism is going wrong.
Presumably what is happening is that a mechanism which evolved to assess biology cannot easily cope with artefacts. If the only thing you have to assess is the quality of a tail, evolution will tend to make you quite good at it. Artefacts, though, are so variable that mental shortcuts are likely to be involved. If everyone agrees something has high status, then it does. But that agreement often transfers the status from the thing to the label.”
http://www.economist.com/node/18483423
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Ex-girlfriend text: “So who are you boinking these days?”
Me: “Let me check my day planner…”
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heh
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My reply to “Do you have a girlfriend?” is usually “a couple/few”
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Roissy, I’d love to read commentary on this:
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A wee bit too defensive don’t you think?
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Everyone needs to watch the video mattag08 has posted. Bonus points for anyone who can make it through the whole thing. Even with my morbid curiosity and iron stomach, I could only stand about three minutes.
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This is great advice!
Here in Korea, these girls always have dating and relationships on their minds. They always pop the question, “Are you single?”
“Nothing too serious” and “I’m not tied down yet” would get their Korean hamsters roaring. Gotta try those.
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Good post and nice comment about game basics.
Comfort-building should wait until after the sexual frame has been set. Trying to build comfort first is why so many men end up pulling their pud alone.
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‘what do you do for fun?’
‘play your cards right and you might find out’
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The romantic libertine. The archetype to either be or emulate. The guy who fucks around, and who gives off the vibe that he could love, possibly does love, and could possibly even marry any one of his dalliances. The guy who does not appear to be a virginity freak.
——-
My go to answer to “are you seeing anyone” is “I’m single”, said after a guilty pause. It implies that I may or may not be dating, but I’m not married yet.
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This was a good find Roissy:
Were I king, in addition to mandatory paternity testing in child support litigation, I would impose certain requirements on men who wish to marry.
Two of these requirements would be:
1. Sit for a screening of “Blue Valentine”
2. Watch the above YouTube commercial
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I got to about 4 minutes in of that video before I had had enough.
Truly sick.
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“Only when my eyes are open, no wait, I see people in my dreams too. Yeah I guess I’m seeing lots of people. Oh wait, you mean am I F’ing anyone, why did you ask, did you want me to add you to the list?”
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Looks like they turned off the comments on the Dear Woman video. Biggest collection of Omegas I have ever seen.
I am sure the parodies will be coming. Here is one:
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re: video
I failed to manage 30 seconds.
Maybe next time I’m REALLY stoned.
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It’s complicated… bring da moviez!
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“Are seeing anyone?”
At this moment, I am seeing you and me on a beach in Barbados. I’m sitting under the umbrella, watching the waves crash on the sand, sea gulls crying as they sail the winds, sipping a pina colada while I wait for to finish my sandwich in the kitchen of our bungalow.
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Oh, on “Dear Woman”… 30 seconds and I felt like I was in politically-correct jail. Respect yourself, she’ll follow; kiss her ass, she won’t.
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Oh, and Capri Anderson explains to Dr. Pinsky What attracted her to Charlie Sheen… watchable and informative:
http://drdrew.blogs.cnn.com/2011/04/05/capri-anderson-family-deeply-affected-by-night-with-charlie-sheen/
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@ mattag08
Fuck are tryin to do to me, dude? You almost ruined a perfectly good pizza with that freakin video! I had to put my food down in utter disbelief at what I was seeing and hearing.
The killing blow came at 5:50, with that damn cat drawing on the wall.
That video is Beta Clockwork Orange material. What’s truly sad is that all those noodle spines make me all the more appealing to hot women.
If that damn thing goes viral so will the divorce rate – about 3yrs later.
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Brb, rebuilding old engines and chopping down trees to compensate for watching that video.
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You have an iron stomach. I couldn’t make it past 20 seconds.
As soon as I heard “we want to apologize for the collective errors of men”, or whatever, I hit the stop the stupidity switch.
Those men are making errors, but I don’t want to apologize for them. I don’t even want to smack them. Years of forum interactions has led me to respond to stupidity with apathy and a next attitude.
Well, it’s like women too, isn’t it. You can spend your mental energies being pissed off and flumoxed and angry at their evil stupid ways, or you can just say “next”.
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Re: Dear Woman
I watched about 10 seconds of it before I had to bail. For one thing, I instantly saw where it was headed and felt no need to go there. For another, there is a fully loaded .45 caliber pistol in easy grabbing distance of where I am sitting. After that regretable incident with my wide screen TV, I was afraid how things might turn out for my computer if this insult and outrage was allowed to continue.
Besides, there is text and there is subtext. The guy on the left is 60% gay and the old guy on the right has had a bilateral orchiectomy for advanced prostate cancer.
Maybe they should just shoot themselves in the head rather than try to take everyone else down with them into the pit of terminal lame-ness.
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haven’t you guys skewered this arjuna ardagh faggot in the past? he’s one of the founders of the group that made the video above and stars in the video.
http://arjunaardagh.wordpress.com/about/
http://www.theglobeandmail.com/life/the-hot-button/conscious-men-apologize-to-women-for-many-years-of-bad-behaviour/article1973897/
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@mattag08
You are a sadist
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@Doug1
“Yes it’s a shit test but it’s not only that. She’s also probing for information. She also wants to know if you’re exclusively committed to some other girl.”
The same could be said when she asks about your ex-gf and how you broke up and what not. Except, in this case making sure you’re not suffering acute oneitis, because no one likes a sad sack who still cries for his ex no matter what Forgetting Sarah Marshall says. Always best to frame your answer, letting her know you broke up with her but hinting that the ex is still after you to add some competition to the mix. Works extra good when it’s true.
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after getting blasted with a “so… do you have girlfriend right now” text and a follow-up (“no, seriously! i want to know!”), i used “what are you tmz now” to great success. thx, bro
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They’ve had to disable comments on that video. I guess the torrent of abuse was too much to screen.
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If all else fails:
“Nigga please!”
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fodder for the board-
http://gawker.com/#!5789538/new-dating-site-is-indistinguishable-from-prostitution
looks like they’ve built an entire business model around “generous” men paying *just* for first dates. either that or it’s a poorly disguised escort service.
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Agree and amplify.
In Hong Kong, girls just blurt out: “So what about your girl friend?”
Me: Which one?
if they push with: That one you’re always with…
Me: Hard to keep track…
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Off topic, sorry…
Someone said on this blog that having lots of sex reduces testosterone levels. I just watched Manswers and they cited studies that prove this to be innaccurate. Just fyi.
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@Bounder, re: the mistake of going for comfort-building before setting a sexual frame –
I dig what you’re saying here. Any tips on how to set a sexual frame in the interaction? And how do you know when the frame is established and it’s time to move on to comfort-building? What signs do you look for from her?
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please, please comment on the level of self-delusion running through this mid-40 something divorcee trying to give dating advice on Match.com:
http://yahoo.match.com/y/article.aspx?articleid=11460&TrackingID=526103&BannerID=744768
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I believe what was said is that masturbating a lot reduces testosterone levels. Yes, you’d expect lots of sex to increase them. It’s not just the ejaculation that is the issue.
Also, fucking a lot without coming is beneficial.
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@ Mattag08
I offer you my commentary on that:
http://delusiondamage.com/2011/04/07/houston-we-have-a-pedestal/
Once I saw it, there was just no way I could refrain from writing about it.
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@xplat
Source?
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Source for which? The not coming? The sex and increase in testosterone? The masturbation and decrease?
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Her: Are you seeing anyone?
Him: I’m feeling some but only have eyes for you baby.
Schwarmy but cute. Let’s a girl know he’s getting some which is attractive to us women because it ups his value and it’s flirtatious which lets the girl believe she’s a special snowflake.
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Dude this game stuff is so lame. Stick to politics.
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Da_Truth_Hurts, stick to refraining from posting your every thought. You seem a lot more brain and a lot less hate that way.
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I’ve answered with, “I’ve tried” before. Not too sure if that was the best answer or not, but there was proof of it on my FB and I assumed she asked because she saw it. This was roughly 3-4 weeks after breakup.
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Maybe that video is a put on? April 1st? They should run that video, then the U-tube video of that girl beating the crap out of a boy who refused her sex.
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Just had this happen tonight, here’s the exchange with a girl I’ve gamed and known but hadn’t seen for a long time:
Her: “Hi, long time no see…where’s your girlfriend?”
Me: Which one?
Her; The pretty one
Me: They’re all pretty otherwise I wouldn’t go out with them.
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I’d avoid the honesty route myself. Of course, I’d rather tell a girl that I’m a fry cook at Carl’s Jr than tell her my real job (network administrator).
A few that have worked well for me have been:
–Hobo
–Snapper Chaser (though it seems no 20-something girls even know what a snapper is)
–On one occasion, I called myself a “secret agent cowboy astronaut”
–Professional Facebook Stalker
One of the worst I’ve ever seen was a guy a few months back who tried to do the Barney Stinson response. It was a truly spectacular failure.
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I can honestly say that after watching a couple of minutes of Mattag’s video I had an uncontrolable urge to hurl, but I didn’t, went and ate some cold pizza instead. It reminded me of the creeps who did the “I’m sorry for the invasion of Iraq” videos a few years ago. Sniveling creeps make up a large percentage of the white, male Western population these days, so thanks roissey for trying to make a difference and change this self-destructive behavior. Before it’s too late.
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I never kiss and tell. When women try to inquire about my past, I just let them know that it is none of their business. That includes my wife.
Nothing bores me more than women whom I in a relationship with who talk about ex-lovers or significant others. If they start talking about it, I just ask them to shut up.
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@aoefe
No, absolutely not.
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the pencil-necked faggot in the video is none other than arjuna ardagh. he is one of the founders of unconscious men and has previously been featured as a beta-of-the-month (or year)
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@mattag08
Screw you. I lasted 18 seconds, but I’m a weak man.
Living in DC there are metric shittons of desperate single late twentyish to mid thirtyish women who ask this question after they get a few appletinis down their gullets. Then it’s game on.
I usually mock them by pausing, cocking my head like a dog who just doesn’t understand, and then slowly saying shit like “one?” or “seeing?” or “desperate much?” if I’m feeling like a prick or totally not interested.
Smartass lazy ambiguity/agree and amplify are my specialties. Let the hamsters do the work.
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… might be the one justification for living in DC.
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Her- “Are you seeing anyone?”
Me- “What day is it..Tuesday? No, we’re good”. Said with a smirk and a laugh. Her reaction, invariably- “you’re awful! Teeheehe”
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Q: You seeing anyone?
A: Why? You looking for a threesome?
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Just to be clear, I wasn’t trolling. I do want Roissy to comment on it (though I can already imagine what will be said).
Also, I had the willpower to make it through 6 minutes. I paused it to take a piss (symbolic?) and then couldn’t bring myself to click play again.
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WOW, I managed to get throught the whole video. SELF DISCIPLINE AND SELF CONTROL RULE.
Have to go puke now, ‘scuse me.
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“Well, I saw her last night”
Thoughts?
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Funny I had this exact same question asked few days ago “Do you have a gf?”, my response “Well… it depends if I feel like it…”
Next day lay
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Used recently: “none of your damn business.”
I don’t care if the peanut gallery considers it beta or whatever: the effect was awesome. If I were enough of a sad sack to line an ex up for booty calls, it would have worked, but mostly I want such people to leave me alone.
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girl: Are you seeing anyone?
me: (whispers) I see dead people.
Said with a wide eyed and slightly vexed facial expression. Indifference, tone and body language are key.
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“A little of this, a little of that. You know. Checking things out.”
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@blue blood- “I see dead people.”
Hmmmm necrophelia? Not everyone’s cuppa. 😉
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1:45 was all I could stand.
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Shit tests in general are something that are kind of nature’s way of weeding out the betas from the alphas.
Why would a chick shit-test a guy she wasn’t attracted to?
I got this one today from the girl I”m seeing who is by all general accounts pretty cool.
But she gets an idea in her head and starts on it.
The issue was why I don’t call her. I sms, I chat, we meet up…but it drives her mental I don’t call her.
Of course I push back saying when I’ve called she was either on the phone, or busy so I gave up.
Also, the more of a logical answer you give to these shit tests…the more they metastasize….
The girl I’m now seeing did ask me once “Are you seeing anyone else?”
I always just laughed it off and never corrected the notion that there were other women.
Then this:
Her:why do you keep refusing to do whatever i ask??!!
is that how you’d like to treat me? is that your character?
Me: totally
Her: why?
Me: no response to that….
For game newbies who don’t understand what’s happening here…it’s a power struggle…
That’s why the “So are you seeing anyone?” is a test…It’s a way of weeding out whether you’re fun, or funny or just like EVERY OTHER GUY….with “yes” or “no”….
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@walawala
“Why would a chick shit-test a guy she wasn’t attracted to?”
Reflex.
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Some replies are better than others, but the important thing to remember is that “Are you seeing anyone” is just a small step away from “Wanna fuck?” If you’re interested, it’s hard to blow this one….
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