Did you act like the alpha all women crave? Let’s find out.
Alex writes:
To start, let me state until a week ago, I was a huge beta male that didn’t realize it. After reading a lot of this site, and some others, I’m trying to shape up my game, so here’s my first try:
It started with her rescheduling a date we had.
Her: Hey sorry, the expedition with my roommates took longer than I expected, can we do another night this week?
(right before we were supposed to meet)
Me: Sure. I’m free Wednesday at 7.Her: Sounds Good 🙂
(20 minutes later)
Me: I’ll pick you up at your house.Her: My roommate isn’t the biggest fan of mysterious guys coming over, so I can meet you there.
(an hour later)
Me: Fine, but you’re buying the first round of drinks. Meet me at X at 7.(almost immediately)
Her: Alright, I’ll be there. 😉I know this isn’t anything special, but I’m fairly proud of myself for my first taste of alpha-dom.
This is a very good exchange. After the initial postponement, he correctly waits until just before the date to let her know that a reschedule is possible, and he is firm about which day and time he can meet. (You want to make a girl sweat a bit when she asks for a rain check, so waiting until the last second to allay her fears is the right thing to do. She’ll wonder if you a) got her message, and b) if you even care.)
When she texts “sounds good” with a smiley, he does not respond with another smiley. You want to avoid the typical beta traps that snare feeble men. He only replies twenty minutes later when necessary.
The girl is starting to feel that her prerogative as an innately higher status female is under threat by Alex’s deft handling of the convo to this point. She responds with the status-boost-by-proxy of claiming that he can’t come to her place to pick her up lest he spook her roommate. This excuse may or may not be true (likely not), but it serves well as a dual purpose shit test and status reinforcer.
Alex waits the requisite one hour before replying to her assinine excuse, and challenges her to rectify the situation by buying the first round. Well done. Chicks lurv a challenge, dontcha know!
When chicks text reply immediately, it means they are sexually aroused.
Summary judgement: The alpha is strong in this one.
Update from Alex:
So she met me at 7, I made her buy all the drinks, and got in her pants. Win-win. Alpha > all.
Called it.
******
For the following analysis, I’ll insert bolded editorial comments where needed.
She Bangs writes:
Alright, to start off I’ve ran into this girl since high school, and always seem to get the girls I targeted to lay down in my bed once I set my sights on them, but this one was particularly difficult. She’s got what every guy might want looks, humor, money, and a phenomenal ass that probably deserves its own booth at the car show. I hooked up with her once after some beers and a movie (she paid) and then we went back to my house where she wrestled with my appendage for about an hour, claiming she couldn’t have sex because she thought of her ex too much. [Ed: Anti-slut defense. This could have been defused.] Didn’t talk to her much because she’s slightly dumb but very booksmart.
Fast forward about 2 years later, I feel a little inclined to see if my avenue is completely cut off, or if I should give it a go another time… Anyway the txts end up going like this…:
Me: You should come out with me on a weeknight.
(Immediately)
Her: Where
(2 minutes later)
Me: Wrong the answer is “Sure”
[Ed: She wants you to lead at this point. The cockiness is overkill. Just tell her the place you’ll take her.]
(Immediately)
Her: K
[Ed: She doesn’t sound playful here. Beware an escalating test of wills.]
(3 minutes later)
Me: Your apartment with wine, cheese, and a B rated movie.
[Ed: You’re walking into her frame, chasing her, and that’s a bad place to be. She gave a flippant reply with that “K” and your hand was forced to follow up with a location and plan well after she originally asked for that info. Also, it’s probably not a good idea to meet a girl at her place. Home turf advantage and all that.]
(2 minutes later)
Her: Thats not going out, whats a b rated?
[Ed: Shit test. She has hand, and she’s gonna use it.]
(2 minutes later)
Me: Gremlins
(1 minute later)
Her: GiZmo?
(2 minutes later)
Me: Gizuntite. Do you do anal?
[Ed: lol. Ok, there’s cocky and funny, and there’s just weird. Guess which one your answer was. It was too late to do any sort of apocalypse opener-type text game with her.]
I’m still waiting for her response, but Im going to call this one a done deal. You think she was offended, intrigued, or just flat out dumbfounded?
Summary judgement: dumbfounded, and not very intrigued in a sexual way. A lot of the success of this exchange depends upon your vibe with her when you first met. I’ll predict this didn’t turn out well, but I’m curious to know, so if the reader She Bangs is reading this, tell us what happened.
******
The_King writes:
Every girl I hook up with doesn’t want to get eaten out… ever…
is this alpha or not?
Are they so horny and ready that they want to skip it to go straight for the goods?
That leads to is eating a girl out beta?
To your first and second questions: hard to say. Could be small sample size, or it could be that you give off a vibe of not being interested in anything but jackhammering. Or maybe you date skanks with stank snatches. It is also possible, as you mentioned, that very horny girls just want to segue straight to the rogering.
To your third question: Eating a girl out anytime during the first few weeks of dating is beta. When you eat a girl out, you telegraph your incredible horniness for her. Men normally do not want to go down on women and bury their mouths in that fetid, humid mess unless they find her so overwhelmingly hot that they can’t help themselves. Women instinctively know this, so they correctly gauge that a man who goes down on them on the first date must feel he’s with one of the best he’s ever had. This, in turn, will sour a woman’s attraction for a man, since no woman in the history of the universe has ever felt raging lust for a man she believed lower than herself in value.
Cunnilingus later in the relationship is absolved from this rule, because you have already demonstrated your manly ability to use her strictly for the piledriving hole she is.
******
walawala writes:
Field Report highlighting the beta to alpha switch and the merits of Mystery Method.
Target: girl who lives in another country, have known for 8 years, always kept in touch with, never banged. She was always talking about getting together but since she lived so far away, we’d only see each other as “Friends” when I went there for business. She’s 34, slim, dresses hot, short skirt, heels, looks good for her age, in the US might be an 8.
She says she’s coming to Hong Kong to visit from China with her hot friend who she seems to want to set me up with. We mostly communicate by Chat/MSN.
We agree to meet for dinner and then go to a dance party-the three of us. But the super hot friend is divorcing her husband who stuck her with her 3 year old daughter for the weekend, so it’s me, my HB7 friend and her HB8 younger single mom with precocious 3 year old in tow.
After studying and practicing game, I decide to see how far this will go. Single mom is clearly out, the kid is a major cock block. But my “friend” looks hot.
From the minute they sat down, I initiate light kino with my friend. Then start escalating it, first a tap on the forearm to make a point, then keeping it there longer.
We go to buy a bottle of wine before the party and before dropping single mom off at hotel with 3 year old rug rat. I carry the rug rat to the wine shop. (Protector of women and children).
At the dance party, I largely ignore my friend instead dancing with other girls. (Pre-selection)
I come back, dance with her, kino, negs, push-pull teasing, back to dancing with other girls. She is giving me major IOI’s. Suddenly she wants to leave. I can stay she says I pause. She looks and smiles—IOI, she wants to come over, so I suggest we come over and have tea.
As we’re walking outside, I remember this blog’s advice to a prior email of mine about waiting is for beta’s and poets. So I lean in and plant a hot wet kiss on her.
She responds like she couldn’t wait. Biting my lip, deep tongue. She’s game.
Back to my place. Banged her twice. She was so into it. She leaves to go back to her hotel room that she’s sharing with her hot friend and friend’s daughter.
Next day she sends text: “forgive me if I was out of control”. Then after we chat, she says it was a “shock” and that she thought we were just “friends” but never thought it would happen “like in a movie”.
Wants me to come travel with her, visit her etc.
This 5 hours of alpha beats 5 years of beta is so true.
Elsewhere here, someone wrote that the essence of game was to look like you don’t care while consciously trying to move it forward. That was how it was that night for me.
Summary judgment: delightfully alpha. I have nothing to add, except, welcome to your escape from the matrix.
******
Fisto writes:
A couple weeks ago I finally sat next to a hot chick on the plane. I just nodded at her, sat down, and opened a book. Occasionally, chuckling under my breath. After I closed my book for a moment she struck up the conversation “what’s that you’re reading”? She is a little older but still a solid 8. Plus she was flying to LA for some kind of fashion thing and she had all these fabrics. This kind of upped my desire to bang her.
I’d exchanged a few txts with her after getting her number when the flight was over. She was flying back that same night and I was getting picked up by another chick anyway.
Here’s the text exchange when I asked her to get together.
Me: I’m back in town mon lets catch up for a drink
Her: Are you asking me on a date or for a buddies drink? Lol
Me: I’ve got too many buddies as is, so the former
Her: Nice. I would love to grab dinner. I save just drinks for buddies 😉
Me: Well before you have dinner w me ur invited to have a drink
Her: Sounds Great!
Then we made plans to meet at this lounge and I eventually got the bang later that night (last night). Anyway, I followed advice from this blog on reframing and avoiding being suckered in to buying dinner only to get a lousy kiss. Just wanted to say thanks.
I like the way this reader handled the woman’s slyly manipulative move to extract dinner resources from him with his reframe away from dinner and back to drinks. You really do not ever want to take a girl you haven’t yet banged to dinner. The food will absorb all the alcohol she drinks, and the seating arrangement at dinner tables is not conducive to kino escalation. And don’t forget that the time to sex is directly proportional to the amount of money spent on her (more money, more high n’ dry time), so keep your cost-per-lay low.
Props also to the aloof and indifferent lack of attention to punctuation. Chicks eat that shit up.
Summary judgment: smooth moves, ferguson.
Many people are talking about a possible second American civil war in the near future. Basically, fed up with being ruled by Washington, with their culture being dictated by NY and LA, the South and Mid-West will wage war against the West Coast and North East. It’s also pointed out that the majority of the US military comes from states in those sections of the country. I don’t think people in Boston and Seattle would be able to do much against the Marines.
While it seems far-fetched, let’s remember how suddenly people turned on their leaders in the Middle East. After decades of being content with just grumbling, people actually did something about it.
It still remains to be seen whether Americans (overmedicated, overfed with High Fructose syrup and god knows what else flowing through their clogged veins) will actually go as far as risking bodily harm and death in rebelling against the Government.
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“Do you do anal?”
Ouch.
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Well,appears I am first. I hate that fag that does the “first ” thing,so I’ll just let you boys have at it. Looks like a good one today!
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“To your third question: Eating a girl out anytime during the first few weeks of dating is beta. When you eat a girl out, you telegraph your incredible horniness for her. Men normally do not want to go down on women and bury their mouths in that fetid, humid mess unless they find her so overwhelmingly hot that they can’t help themselves.”
That is definitely not true. Virtually no self-respecting alpha male in the animal kingdom would think of mounting their female without first savoring and preparing the chalice.
Like many actions in life, there is of course an alpha and beta approach to the act. Asking her to smother you or some version is obviously beta. But there are many other ways that show your dominance and ultimate claim on your woman. IOW, how you go about things makes a huge difference in the message (and the turn-on).
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And don’t forget that the time to sex is directly proportional to the amount of money spent on her (more money, more high n’ dry time), so keep your cost-per-lay low.
This videovideo shows you how to get your cost-per-lay to approach infinity.
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@Next
Not gonna happen. The same American people who won’t even consider voting for a third party or a main party candidate who’s too ‘non-mainstream’ are going to rise up in armed rebellion? I’ll believe it when I see it. And, as you point out yourself, Americans are overweight and obese (66%), hardly fit for any professional fighting units.
I wouldn’t like to see a battle between some ragtag, flabby mid-westerners and the Delta Force commanders. There’d be blown out blubber everywhere.
Any breakaway military units would be dealt with from the air, like Ghaddafi was successfully doing before we had to rain on his parade.
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*commaders = commandos.
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Oral sex is something a lot of men don’t do well, and for some woman its their best way to get off. I’ve seen a girl become a mad horny sex craver after giving her good oral, they will come back for more.
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seems to be game talk thread (finally!), so I’ll just throw this one in there…
How do you recover, if you screw up the first drinks date? Took a girl out few days ago. Hit her out on FB, “when are you free etc”, she’s like next week maybe etc.. Chatted about BS/work, I say “blow it off and let’s go out”. She’s “ok, but after work” So, went very well, we meet up.
So first two hours with drinks, good, she’s enjoying it. Then we go into deeper conversation and something went wrong, I think I said something bad/beta, can’t quite pinpoint. At some point took/squeezed her hand, she squeezed back a little, but then laughed and took it away. She’s suddenly pretty aloof. Took her back to her car, she’s all “yeah let’s do it another time”, but didn’t even go for a kiss. Got a feeling it’s going to shit, was pretty pissed. Bad part (and probably major reason it went sour) – she’s not all that but I actually quite liked her, she’s cool and interesting.
Then 2 days later she posts a work-related success on FB, I hit her up (approx.):
me: drinks on you
her: why
me:
her: ah 🙂
me: 🙂
me: so what are you doing later tonight, let’s go celebrate
her: i’m sorry, really can’t tonight..
me: that’s call, call you sometime next few days
end of conversation
Now, not sure what I fucked up earlier, but second chat was a mistake, took the bait with her post. Sad but interesting part – I actually hooked up with another chick night in between, first date, I think my mini-oneitis with this one helped.
So is there a way to salvage it from here? When to call? Officially I have her number and we’re almost / (in early stages of) dating. Unofficially, I don’t think anything’s gonna happen unless I either recover somehow or go full beta provider/orbiter which I’m not really interested in.
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Ray Manta,
Have you actually tried and tested the advice in that video and found it to be successful?
Jim,
Some men just don’t want to go down on women, deal with it. I understand kissing her tits and stuff, but why would you want to out your tongue anywhere near such a unhygienic area? Do you follow it up with analingus?
Dave,
Then they can get a pet dog and train it to do that.
Next,
Why should there be a war? I’m a New Yorker and would favor a deal whereby the north east and west coast states (plus a few liberal northern ones like Illinois and Minnesota ) leave the union and join Canada. That way, we in the blue states could get to to be ruled from Ottawa and would be able buy from their huge agricultural industry without import tariffs. The red states would remain the ‘US’ and could then do whatever they wanted. Liberals who want to join ‘New Canada’ would have to move. Likewise Conservatives that want to remain part of America.
And there you’d have it. No more evil people in NY and LA telling you salt of the Earth folks how to live your lives.
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wordpress doesn’t like brackets ha.
convo above:
me: drinks on you
her: why
me: “thing she wrote about”
her: ah 🙂
me: 🙂 <-this was a mistake
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on oral… The Man From Delmonte, grow up/seek help.
But I am with The_King on this one, they rarely want it if you come off alpha. I had a few times when she’d actually pull away and go for the old pogo stick instead (and no I’m not that bad at it). Interesting.
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She Bangs was a disaster.
Fisto did a good job of not allowing her to pressure him into buying her dinner and yet still being pleasant about it. This woman probably quickly realized she was being a pushy about the dinner after his firm response and went out of her way to be nice the rest of the night. Fisto’s texts are exactly the way I would have wanted to be talked to.
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There’s nothing wrong with giving her a couple of orgasms through oral as a prelude to intercourse, particularly if you’re in reverse 69 and plumbing the depths of her throat at the same time.
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I just stopped at the first two events to note the comparison. The first one was very subtle. It did not try to take anything away. It just didn’t give in. The other was trying to amp it all up.
Basically how I see it is one man was just trying to get what he wanted as efficiently as possible. The other was posturing. The best most natural thing to do is be selfish and this is case in point. Sure I’ll reschedule but I won’t like it. Keep jacking me around and it better be worth my while. Do I want to go to her place for wine and cheese? I’d guess not.
So rather than all this over thinking just be mildly selfish. Budge when necessary, but grudgingly. I’d rather she drive here. I’d rather meet closer to me. I’d rather do what I want to do.
When she said where, he tried to be dominant, and tried to control her reaction. You don’t care about her reaction because you are doing something and she can tag along, her loss if she doesn’t.
You don’t need to get in anyone’s head, or out think them. Alpha behavior does not think what they think or want.
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LOL, LOl, LOzzzzzl
The hamster runs deep and fast in this one.
While checking out some book titles mentioned in a the comments at Chuck’s (G.L. Piggy), I found this review for a book called The Lazy Husband: How to Get Men to Do More Parenting and Housework
Corporate Lawyer – Check
Out of time – Check
Alpha father – Check
Use of words such as “trauma” and “patriarchal” – Check
Hamster speed – High
Prognosis – Poor.
Off topic, perhaps, but a light diversion nonetheless.
[Editor: If a gf ever uses the word patriarchal around me in a serious manner, I’m outta there. It’s a leading indicator of so much unpleasant shit about her personality and behavior.]
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The alpha thing to do is not ponder on whether or not it would be beta to go down on the girl, but simply do what you want. If you like giving oral, take the opportunity, if not then don’t.
As a display of dominance I always tell the girl to give me oral before I would to her. If for whatever reason she doesn’t (which has happened to me once so far), I don’t give it to her from a quid pro quo perspective.
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Excellent case studies. Real-life cases from a variety of men provide great learning opportunities. The successes offered here are much more educational even than the failures.
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I one dated a shick who told me that bars are too “hetero-normative” and exclude a lot of people…yup she was a feminist
I mean who uses words like “hetero-normative” “cis-gender” “queer” wtf!
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Chateau is right about giving oral. Women want to be taken, they want to feel your masculine power. Only an alpha male can give her that. Eating her pussy is a gift, a different kind of pleasure. She can get that from anyone, even another woman. Save it for later.
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I have two associations with men who are eager to get to oral sex before the rest:
– they pride themselves on being “good” lovers who always makes sure the woman gets off, and probably have slept with a fair number of ladies. Generally, they also claim to enjoy the act.
– men who do not get laid very often and have sincerely bought into the idea that women love sensitive, giving lovers.
you can tell the difference between them when you’re hooking up with them.
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Flahute
Agree. The first few times at least should not involve you giving her oral.
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“As we’re walking outside, I remember this blog’s advice to a prior email of mine about waiting is for beta’s and poets.”
If a girl is giving you IOI’s in a bar and agrees to go outside alone with you, you can go for the kiss 99% of the time. My favorite line is, “Want to go outside and get some air?” It has plausible deniability for both you and the girl, but she knows what’s up in the back of her mind.
“Me: I’ve got too many buddies as is, so the former”
Subtle DHV. Beauty.
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my own simple rules of texting:
– alphanumeric characters only. eliminating punctuation completely means you’ll never use emoticons (emoticons are for girls) or ask questions (of course some of what you’ll say will really be questions, but without a question mark at the end, it is perceived as more of a demand or assertion)
– keep your responses shorter than hers
– if you have to think for more than a few seconds for a response, you’re putting too much thought into it. say nothing.
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In my many years of acting properly alpha, I always screwed up the dinner-after-good-sex point. Last year I stopped it, and the results have been triple the expected results. Excellent post.
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> Cunnilingus later in the relationship is absolved from this rule, because you have already demonstrated your manly ability to use her strictly for the piledriving hole she is.
I know several authors write for this blog, and I like it, but you are directly contradicting each other with this line when other writers claim that you respect and adore women.
[Editor: Another humor-impaired dweeb heard from.]
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I can meditate on some of these stories, just as thought provoking as zen koans.
I think theres a point at which The alpha/game and spirituality intersect, both to some degree aré about not caring…..?
Cold you have moré of these on your blog? So useful…..
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[Editor: Another humor-impaired dweeb heard from.]
IIRC one of the other authors also said that responding angrily to a “shit test” is evidence of having had hurt feelings. I’m sorry I hurt your feelings.
[Editor: Silly dweeb. That wasn’t anger.]
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A guy could run with his disgust and disapproval, or use her words as an opportunity to spin things in his favor. Try to find whatever in her attitude is beneficial to you, and make her agree out loud.
“So, you’re not fond of things being too bland, homogenous, and normal?”
Make her agree that her mood is for edgy fun.
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I like how Fisto drew out the fashion chick. A man who chuckles out loud while reading is a man who does what he pleases.
How he handled her in text was perfect frame control. He set the frame. She tested his frame, then tried to change the frame to dinner (i.e. a bigger investment from him). He maintained the frame until she capitulated with an exclamation (tingles).
She Bangs was a disaster. By being try-hard, he crossed over from asshole to dumb-ass. The least-bad thing he wrote is still terrible:
Telling a girl what she should do is weak. It implies that you are demanding that she change her mind, just the opposite of assuming the sale. Just ask her as if you never thought for a second she’d say no. “Let’s meet for a drink on Tuesday night.” Hasn’t this been said here many times?
[Editor: It has. Yeah, I didn’t catch that “should” qualifier. Weak sauce indeed.]
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Flahute,
You’re right. That “should” makes him sound like he isn’t confident and he cares too much. It is a privilege for her to have drinks with you, not something she needs to be commanded to do.
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Music to our ears!
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I fucked up a few weeks ago with a girl I thought I had her in the bag. She doesn’t return my calls or texts(the few I sent, didn’t tried to seem clingy) and the only time I caught her on the phone , she was very distant and cold.
The reason she became like this is that during one of our hang-outs, I told her I don’t give girls gifts, but they can give me gifts if they want to.
How hard did I fucked it up and is there any chance of salvaging the relationship?
I figured disappearing for a couple of weeks without any hint of where I am or what am I doing but maybe there are some other strategies.
Any ideas?
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So what do you guys think is the best way to diffuse the “I still think of my ex too much” anti slut defence?
I copped that about a month ago and it stumped me. I told her life is too short to pine over an ex but it got me no where.
She rang me a week later but I couldn’t meet her because I was already out with friends (probably a good thing letting her know i have a life that doesn’t involve her). I’ve tried calling her just over a week ago but it went to voicemail (I left a simple message) and I haven’t heard from her since.
[Editor: When a girl drops the “i still think of my ex” shit test — and make no mistake, that’s what it is — the worst thing you can do is accept her frame and plead, coerce, or otherwise gently persuade her to get over it. You have to reframe by co-opting her stinky bait: tell her you know the feeling, and then plow. Don’t wait for her answer.]
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You do it non-verbally. Just nod, and be supportive, but continue your escalations as if it didn’t make any difference. Because it doesn’t.
I’ve seduced a girl who was litterally crying about a recent breakup, and still trying to fuck the guy. And from that it wasn’t much time before she was head over heels for me and bawling uncontrollably for weeks about leaving me on an airplane.
Just act as if it’s natural, a phase of life, a common happnestance. But don’t talk about it. Nod. Be sympathetic. But then change the subject and have your you and her time. Don’t be her shoulder to cry on, and don’t push away her feelings. Be like a meditator – thoughts just come and go – don’t cling – let them pass.
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Smeq,
You don’t give gifts, but then you repeatedly call and text a girl who isn’t interested in you? That doesn’t make sense.
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In Vietnam, official army regulations required any infantry officer who discovered a scary, stinking, deep tunnel to send a man down into the fetid Ho Chi Minh highway, armed with only a 1911 A1 Colt 45 and a flashlight.
This was certainly alpha, if stupidly suicidal. Rather than rolling a large, powerful grenade or two into this tight, tiny chamber of horrors, or simply emptying a long heavy machine gun into this gaping maw of wonder, the GI (or often the LT himself) would stick his face in there and see what treasures or intel lay beneath.
If it smells like fish, it’s a tasty dish. If it smells of cologne, leave it alone.
Scotch, cigars, oysters with tobasco, beer, and vagina are all “acquired” tastes, and all are decidedly alpha.
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retsie –
you’ve probably heard of the “agree and amplify” method to pass a shit test
so here’s the best LMR technique: “agree and escalate”
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also, everyone, if you liked Fisto’s response you can talk to him, and other guys like him, at the RooshV forums.
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@ Smeq–I wouldn’t worry about it man. Women think they have magical vaginas and that they are always 100% correct. It’s like a child throwing a tantrum. Don’t give in. Remember–(as Tom Leykis says) women are like buses, there’s another coming around the corner in 10 minutes.
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On oral and being Alpha: Nothing will bond a girl to you like doing what YOU want and ignoring her verbal requests in such a way that you are actually pleasing HER. You can do anything in an Alpha way, but you have to frame it as “I want to do this, it’s happening.”
Even cuddling isn’t immune. Move her around during. Like if her hand is resting on your chest, move it to your shoulder, stomach or thigh. And when eating her out, don’t give her a choice. The most beta thing you can possibly do is ask her “Can I eat you out now?” “Do you want to cuddle now?” “You seem sore, do you want a massage?” Pin her down and do what you want. It’s really playful and dominant at the same time when done right.
Given, my current girlfriend tends to be pretty selfless by nature, so she regularly claims she doesn’t want me to do these things; or rather that she feels bad asking me to. This strategy is thus a good way to both maintain the frame and provide some comfort game.
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I’ve got another one for you that just happened today. I met this gal out with a group of people a few days ago and she was friends with a buddy of mine’s gf. She was there with someone, but told her friend that she wanted to hangout. We started txting the next day and I said I was free Sunday day. She said she was busy with a friend from out of town but wanted to see about getting together a week later on the following Sunday. I recognized this as a shit test.
Me: Ill hav to let you know, may be in la that we
a day later;
Her: Hello, how are ya? So my friend cancelled her trip to Vegas this weekend. So, I’m free Sun if you want to grab something to eat?
Me: (36 mins later) Are you inviting urself to lunch??
Her: (3 mins later) Yep, I guess I am
Me: (12 mins later) if u eat out of a glass then sure, sounds good
Her: (3 mins later) bloody marys, breakfast of champions! Took me a second to get that, a lil slow today. Where do u want to meet up?
Nothing says take it or leave it like not buying girls food
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One for the I-sh*t-you-not and/or you’re-proud-of-that? category…
“How Getting Divorced Revived My Sex Life,” by Lorraine Berry, Salon, 26 April 2011
http://www.salon.com/life/sex/index.html?story=/mwt/feature/2011/04/26/sex_life_returns_at_38
Stock up on Tidy Cat and Meow Mix and learn to love getting pumped-and-dumped even at the old folks’ home, babe.
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An update on that one….
I met up with her for a dirty weekend a few weeks later.
Then I invited her over for Christmas and she flaked, it was some type of anti-slut defense.
I used vulnerability game….”we had a good thing going, why are you trying to ruin it?”
Then she relented and said “ok….”
I said “sorry, I’m busy that week….”
Some time passed, she insisted on getting together again and I kept saying I was busy.
Finally, I had a chance to go to her city on business. She wanted to stay over. I said “Sorry got to work, but let’s go for dinner”.
She came over to my room after dinner, put on a slinky sexy dress and banged me while wearing it.
A few days later she texted me to ask “Why were you so distant that night?”
So…when you’re in you’re in.
The other part of this story is I began banging another girl so getting together one way or the other was no biggie for me.
I think girls sense this.
Recently, I began seeing another girl more regularly. She shit tests all the time.
Just last night we met up after I ignored her for a few days.
Her: “Did you miss me?”
Me: Looking at her big smile…
Her: Well??? Did you?
Me: Laughing “That’s such a chick question…. Did you miss me?”
Her: Yes…
Me: Good…
She started laughing and didn’t push.
I have begun to notice that there is a kind of unspoken understanding when you start gaming women.
Here’s a few things I’ve noticed when I game…women will:
1) role play along with whatever you introduce. In one case the girl I was gaming said something about being a ghost who suddenly appeared. Me: “I’m a vampire….”
Since then, she’s always pretending I’m a vampire and role playing the scared girl.
2) When you parry their shit tests as above, they will laugh, it’s a genuine laugh like they know that you know that they know they’re shit-testing.
3) When you pass a shit-test as above….they bang you senseless. If you fail or barely pass….it’s almost as though they’re disappointed.
However, if you say “I missed ya baby…” first….then you’re dominant.
A year ago…I was a disaster when it came to game.
This blog and trial and error has helped tremendously.
Thanks all.
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Smeq
“”I fucked up a few weeks ago with a girl I thought I had her in the bag. She doesn’t return my calls or texts(the few I sent, didn’t tried to seem clingy) and the only time I caught her on the phone , she was very distant and cold.
The reason she became like this is that during one of our hang-outs, I told her I don’t give girls gifts, but they can give me gifts if they want to.””
I’ve done this before.
Sounds like you’ve sent too many texts and are trying to hard to be alpha.
Read up on “overgaming”.
If you didn’t establish attraciton first, or weren’t sufficiently cocky about the gift giving you come off as a cold unfeeling asshole.
I don’t know the context of how this was brought up.
If she said “I like getting gifts….” and you said “I don’t give girls gifts…” that may have been over-gaming.
Next time listen more carefully to what she says and how she says things.
I find that being vague is better and more mysterious.
You say you had it in the bag….then you said that stuff about not giving gifts….
Sounds like “overgaming”.
What I’ve found is that once you establish your alpha cred, you can get away with showing some vulnerability as long as it’s something you overcame.
Read the Mystery Method….
Cocky funny is at the beginning, then you have to move to “comfort”….
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Smeq, this was probably not the only thing that you said wrong:
Just because you say something doesn’t make it true. In the world of men, if you talk and act like a tough guy, you’ve got to back it up, right? It’s the same in the world of women. You were trying to declare your higher value, when instead you needed to demonstrate it through word and action. Women can see right through such a pretense and will reject you for it.
Giving gifts is not, in itself, a bad thing, but guys do it wrong when they attempt to buy the favor of a woman. Never give a woman who is not in a sexual relationship with you a gift. To do it right, it needs to be a small, insignificant token gift that demonstrates thought and consideration, and is given without any expectation of reciprocation. Only beta males give something with an expectation of getting something in return. That beta frame is what you were trying to obliterate with your statement and she saw right through it.
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Delmonte wrote:
Ray Manta,
Have you actually tried and tested the advice in that video and found it to be successful?
Well, no, since the guy in the video isn’t offering any. He’s just singing a song about how bad the hottie of his heart’s desire is because she’s banished him to the LJBF zone, although for him it’s more like Let’s just be a piece of furniture zone. He refuses to change his fawning behavior because he believe “he just might have a chance”. I think his time and efforts would be better spent hitting on someone else or banging a hooker.
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The first situation has nothing to do with game. I would’ve acted the same in a situation like that, but my attempt to get the girl to buy the first round of drinks would end with her cancelling the date. In fact, she would’ve probably made herself unavailable right after I rescheduled the date. This wasn’t at all about game. This was about her already being attracted to him.
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The above examples do not show the power of game so much as the looseness of women who are past their prime.
The woman in the second example didn’t act differently when she was 26 as opposed to 34 because her male friend acquired superhero game powers. Instead she is acting as a woman who has much more limited options on the sexual market.
The older woman in the last example even acquiesced to first date sex, while the self described alpha in example one has difficulty connecting via text with a college age girl in her sexual prime.
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Smeq-
I think the only way to salvage the situation is to demote her to “Brat that I tolerate” status, count her out of your lovelife, and then make sure she sees you with other girls at least as hot as she is. If the girls you are seen with are in her outer social circle, so much the better. Two weeks of this, and she will re-establish contact.
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I have a question I need some help with.
I’m in university, so last Wednesday I was at a really pretty girl’s dorm. I actually met her like a month back, but I declined her asking to meet me first time, and then there was a university break so I was at home for two weeks. Then we finally got together this week.
The problem was that she sat in some chair in front of her bed while I was sitting on her bed. Suddenly it was already very late (time flew by because a case of one-itis struck me, I think) and I left, without kissing her. Very bad move, imo.
How do I fix it in an alpha manner next week? If she’s sitting on the chair again next time I should just tell her “Hey, come sit here on the bed with me” and then kiss her a little after that? We’ll be seeing each other again at her dorm in a few days.
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It warms my cold heart to see men improving their game.
@V
How do I fix it in an alpha manner next week? If she’s sitting on the chair again next time I should just tell her “Hey, come sit here on the bed with me” and then kiss her a little after that? We’ll be seeing each other again at her dorm in a few days.
Yep. The “come sit here” line works as long as she doesn’t think you’re too beta. If she shit tests with “why?”, respond with “because I’m going to kiss you” if you have the balls for that.
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I think you can also thank their hormonal shift. They don’t suddenly just grow a brain for their self interest. Much of their young skittishness is hormonally driven. There comes a time when the goods must move no matter the market price.
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V –
If you aren’t comfortable doing the “come sit here” thing, you’ve still got to break up this sitting apart just talking situation. I suggest you find something in her room that interests you, stand up, walk over to it, pick it up, and comment on it. Your attitude should be amused and mildly interested, lightly playful. There are usually stories behind the things girls bring with them to college. Get her talking about it. If she stands up and comes over to you, it becomes a kino opportunity. Start flirting, teasing her.
“How long have you had this, since you were 3?”
“Oh, this is cute, did your first boyfriend give this to you?”
Deep, serious, meaningful conversations in her room will get you LJBF’d. Be playful, cocky, amuse yourself, and most of all, start touching her. When you’ve got her smiling, laughing, having fun, you can escalate easily.
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Fisto obviously had the best game.
He went in knowing what he wanted to do. He did so without overselling. He blocked her advances and reiterated what HE wanted to do. She accepted.
He was the unbending force that a woman likes.
Compare the following:
Me: You should come out with me on a weeknight.
to
Me: I’m back in town mon lets catch up for a drink
as an opening text, the second text is a much stronger approach IMHO. I’m actually gonna steal it
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what about fingerbanging the chick in public? is that something to strive to do?
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All good alpha tales.
With some time I’ll post a tale of interest.
I don’t know how alpha it is, but it definitely smells nifty.
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Anon,
Dangerous situations moisten cunts, to be sure. Better to get head tho than fingerbang her.
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OK dangerous situations? Awesome. What are the other ways to getting a chick’s pussy wet on the spot?
I was reading a crappy movie script and this stuck out to me cos I see “gina tingle” on here so much:
INT. JEEP CHEROKEE / on highway – nIGHT
Going fast. Johnny Cash on the CD.
LIZ
When does the luck kick in?
CRIS
It already has.
LIZ
I don’t feel anything.
CRIS
Not even a tingle?
The rest of the script is not so good…. The movie is Next with Nic Cage lolzzlzozlzolz
But yeah, serious question– can you get a chick to tingle just by saying tingle?
Got me thinking about this Roissy post:
http://roissy.wordpress.com/2010/09/09/tough-times-are-a-bounty-for-betas/
“Throw in a bit of NLP for good measure: “My afterlife is probably… beLOW me. Sex is a great way to fight death… with me, I love each day I’m alive.””
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great reports Roissy. Although not a lot of these are incredibly inspiring, they are practical and simple basic steps to becoming more alpha.
Cheers!
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I am surprised that the host of our Chateau could think of a woman’s genitals as a “fetid, humid mess” and of eating a woman out as a submissive or beta act, and in this way reduce the availability of a powerful seduction tool.
Most women I’ve been with paid attention to the aesthetic appeal of their genital region, making sure it smells, feels and looks good, and the hygienic care they take makes sure it tastes good, too. Of course there’s a possibility that one might, on occasion, discover a bit of a “fetid, humid mess” down there; in that case one can charge that particular careless, self-disrespecting woman to the game and move on to pastures fresher. No gain without risk and all that.
Having ascertained that a fresh, fragrant and flavorful love nest awaits our attentions, we can proceed with implementing our plan for inducing that state of submissive, yet explosive, desire in our woman that is the Holy Grail for inhabitants of this Chateau. We will achieve this by classifying our attentions into “Orgasm Inducing” and “Teasing and Tingling” attentions. Of the former class, rapid and sustained flicking of the tip of the tongue across, around or up and down the clitoris, alone or combined with one two fingers inserted in the vagina, hooked upwards to simultaneously pressure and stroke the G spot, is the one I have found most effective; other Chateau guests are of course welcome to share their experience and hard-won knowledge. In the latter class of “Teasing and Tingling” attentions we can include anything our imagination and senses suggest to us: sucking on the labia, licking around the perineum and inner thighs, and gentle stroking of the labia and clitoris with the flat of the tongue come to mind, but the variations and possibilities are legion.
Having warmed the female up with a combination of alternately applied TNT and OI attentions, our target is to sense when she has reached that point when a sufficient application of OI will bring her to a point just before the onset of the beginning of orgasm. We gradually approach this critical point by alternating OI and TNT, getting closer to it each time. Our objective is to induce in the female such a powerful desire for the closure of orgasm that she will literally become putty in our skilled hands.
When we feel that we have approached the critical point as close as possible without actually inducing orgasm in the woman, and she is begging for the release of orgasm, no doubt very vocally by this point if we are anywhere close to where we want to be, we can then turn the tables on her in a way which can lead her to the heights of submissive fulfilment she craves.
We can, for example, cease orally stimulating her and immediately penetrate her instead. The cessation of oral stimulation and substitution of the insertion of the erect penis into a vagina rendered just pre-orgasmic by said oral stimulation, changes the focus of the progression to orgasm and prolongs the duration of the pre-orgasmic state. Administering a righteous rogering under these circumstances can induce in the woman a vaginal orgasm of shattering intensity, the more so if the rogering is administered using a position submissive for the woman, such as doggy style.
The woman, craving orgasmic release while in this critical state, might try to thwart our plans by using her fingers to bring herself off. Naturally we should not allow this. We will pinion her arms behind her, or to her sides, forcing her to accept the orgasm we will offer her rather than the one she can offer herself, which works out to her benefit of course, since the orgasm she will achieve in our hands when we apply these methods is likely to be much more intense.
Another possibility we can explore after having brought our woman to the critical point is to really turn the tables on her and get her to perform oral sex on us. It seems to be a widely neglected fact that many women are strongly stimulated while giving a man oral sex. If, however, this happens while the woman is in a state where her conscious thoughts dominate her feelings, the act of submitting to a man in this manner may trigger her feminist social conditioning and reduce or mask the primal pleasure she gets from stimulating an erect penis to a hot, musky masculine throb with her lips and tongue and then engulfing it with her mouth and throat, while allowing her to rationalise or manipulate the situation to a condition where she considers herself to be doing the man a favour. Getting a woman to give oral sex when she is in a pre-orgasmic, orgasm-begging frenzy shuts down these rationalisations, allowing the sensations of the moment to engulf her conscious being. The man is likely to enjoy a blowjob of consummate skill, administered by a woman whose vagina is wet and pulsating with the throes of her submissive passion, especially if we have maneuvered her into giving the blowjob from a position particularly submissive for the woman, e.g. kneeling in front of the man.
This opens up other possibilities for turning the tables on her once again when we are almost about to reach orgasm as a result of her oral attentions. For example, we can get her into some variation of the sixty nine position, and simultaneously orally stimulate her as she blows us. The closer she gets us to orgasm, the more OI we give her; should she pause or wander into giving us TNT, we give her TNT until she gives us our own OI (the concepts of TNT and OI stimulation apply to men as well as women, of course). With reasonable care, sensitivity and skill, this can lead to earth-shaking simultaneous orgasms for man and woman.
Pulling any of this off the first time we get into bed with her makes sure she will be all over us wanting to come back for more, disarming the tactics of withdrawal and scarcity women use with lesser men.
Using our tongue, lips and fingers in addition to our pricks with imagination and skill can only help us become more effective in getting our woman where we, and she, want her to be: writhing on the bed, screaming our name and asking for more. A woman’s genitals, a “moist and fetid mess”, and cunnilingus beta and submissive? I beg to strongly differ.
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Ruberosa
Dude, its just sex. Never forget that what might be going on in your head has nothing to do with what is going on in hers.
So, when the time comes, just fuck her good and hard like you mean it. She will supply her own rationalizations and fantasy-enhancements.
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It is sad to see how the relationships between men and women have devolved into playing utterly childish and petty games of one-upmanship. There is no single point to lay the blame, but there are certainly factors that have contributed to the present situation.
The first thing that comes to mind is the fact that maleness has been consistently diminished and ridiculed in our society for a couple of decades (at least), positioned as something inferior and shameful. It appears that this shaming approach is an offshot or an over-compensation for the fact that women had limited rights in times past and in the fervent desire to make things right society went too far in the opposite direction.
Women have become downright unpleasant these days in the rabid desire to show off their dominance at every step. Men in response have developed “Game” – an altogether self-defeating concept that on occassion might net somebody emotionally barren sex, but ensures that no genuine relationship can form in the long run.
[Editor: Proof by assertion is no way to go through life, son.]
I have a steady girlfriend whom I will probably marry in a couple of years when I hit 30, but I feel like I am amongst the last of a dying breed. My girlfriend and I got together because we chatted like normal people (physical attraction was obviously there) and posturing was kept at a minimum.
[You were posturing whether you were consciously aware of it or not.]
When we started to date, we both knew to a pretty good extent each other’s strengths, weaknesses, potential, and limits.
[The way to bet is that you worked to deemphasize your weaknesses and emphasize your strengths when you started dating her.]
I know where the wind blows these days and even though I trust my girlfriend I will still be getting a prenupt agreement because there is no telling how we will feel about each other in five years time. I am not anticipating us breaking up, but should that come to pass, I cannot quite envision getting another relationship of similar quality without a huge deal of effort. Everywhere I look, there are fewer and fewer women with whom it’s possible to have a normal conversation that doesn’t result in immediate, animalistic assessment of power/value and conditional treatment of the other person as either a precious jewel or a worthless piece of dirt.
I think that in today’s society women clearly have the upper hand in most aspects of life and that fact is dawning on men slowly but inevitably. Women who look reasonably well and are of fertile age receive an uncommon amount of attention and pandering from society and their path in life is far easier than that of men of similar level of intelligence, social standing, wealth, and attractiveness. Women have come to dominate upper education enrollments and there will soon be more female college graduates than male. In a decade or two, men will become a minority in the upper echelons of the corporate world and perhaps the political world as well. The only place where men are still holding fort are the deeply technical areas, which women seem to loathe (not clear whether that’s due to upbringing or by nature). That’s not a big problem for women though – they will be the ones who will be telling technically-minded men what to do. The future looks scary.
[Only if you think the world as it is currently constituted can continue to run when it has turned into a multinational HR department.]
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It’s possible that corporations will rule, and not nations, in the next twenty years. Corporations could issue their own bonds and currencies and have their armies.
Analogous to how city-states were replaced with empire states (greece to rome), or feudal states were replaced with nation states. With america’s looming hyperinflation, corporations could be the next entity to rule the power void.
If such a world does arise, then women will be in control of it. Completely unprecedented, but why not?
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[Editor: Proof by assertion is no way to go through life, son.]
I don’t know if it qualifies as proof, I made a statement of opinion, which is obviously subjective, but if I play my own devil’s advocate, I am not able to refute it. What possible path can there be to a fulfilling relationship if it’s based on illusory foundations if not outright lies? Perhaps it works for people who simply don’t feel a compelling need for trust in their most intimate relationships and maybe it’s a way to get a foot in the door at the expense of heavy competition, but it seems like a drug that can be fun for a moment, but carries terrible implications in the long run.
I can understand some points of the seduction concept and how they can work to “spice up” the process. No issue with that. But there are far reaching implications if “Game” is appropriated as a conduit to all interaction with women. Nothing lasting can be built and it’s presents sabotages the efforts of everyone, not just those who use it.
[You were posturing whether you were consciously aware of it or not.]
Only in the sense that I tried to dress well and sound as intelligent/funny as I could muster. I didn’t sell myself as more than I really am though so there was never any serious fear that one “beta” sounding statement could ruin the entire interaction, which seems to be a prevalent theme in all the conversations about game including the emails you quoted in the blog entry.
[The way to bet is that you worked to deemphasize your weaknesses and emphasize your strengths when you started dating her.]
I could answer that yes, of course I tried to put the proverbial “best foot” forward, but not quite in the way that you seem to understand it. I did not have to exercise any extreme caution or scrutinize the minutiae detail of what I was going to say in paralyzing fear that it would all crumble like a house of cards. I think I was just lucky to find a girl who was a bit old fashioned when it came to dating, but very progressive in most other aspects – it seems like a rare combination.
[Only if you think the world as it is currently constituted can continue to run when it has turned into a multinational HR department.]
I don’t know if it can. In the long term it will probably lead to serious trouble when decisive action is needed and there’s nobody with the fortitude, authority or just the requisite strength of character to carry it out. That could be decades away though and the coming years are not looking good for men in the Western world.
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@J178
“”The above examples do not show the power of game so much as the looseness of women who are past their prime.
The woman in the second example didn’t act differently when she was 26 as opposed to 34 because her male friend acquired superhero game powers. Instead she is acting as a woman who has much more limited options on the sexual market.””
Women are women. It’s easy to blow this off as a kind of lucky break.
But the reality is much different.
Game requires a clear understanding of how to unleash that passion.
I think girls in their 20’s are much easier. Girls in their 30’s are more cautious.
So in each case, game requires a tailoring and calibration.
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http://articles.nydailynews.com/2011-02-22/entertainment/28639602_1_oral-cancer-hpv-vaccines-cervical-cancer
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Let me sum up every post about “game”. Ur attitude should always be “I don’t give a FUCK.” Always. She’ll be sucking ur dick before u know it.
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