Pimps keep strong eye contact with their hos, but you’ll notice that’s only when the pimps are talking to them. When the hos reply, the pimps will glance around distractedly. A previous Chateau post advised that you should look around the room a bit when a girl is talking to you, because acting distracted is a display of higher value. Nitpick-y trolls readers wondered if there was an inconsistency there. Not at all. As an aspiring alpha male, you want to look around when a girl is angling for your attention, but you want to hold eye contact when you are leading the conversation and want her attention focused on you.
As a reader writes:
Real quick, eye contact:
When you are communicating, lock on. And demand eye contact back, subtlely (body Lang). When you are listening, not so much… Unless you’re at the point when she needs your validation.
A lot of aspy nerds read advice here to “look distracted” and they try to hammer that advice into every conceivable hole, not realizing that context matters and advice that is appropriate for one situation may not be so under different circumstances. We here at the Chateau try to cover all the ground, but some readers are too lazy to look up older posts that would answer their skepticism.
So, for the less nuanced thinkers:
Hold eye contact when you are talking to a girl.
Look around the room like you’re distracted by something when she’s talking to you, until, as the reader noted, she needs signs of attainability (i.e. validation) from you.
Adjust the ratio of eye contact-to-distraction based upon time spent together and hotness of girl. If you just met her and she’s a hottie, look more distracted when she talks. If she’s ugly, you’ll need to listen VERY attentively so she feels like she has a shot with you. If you’ve been dating her for a few months, look more attentive when she talks to you.
The archives of this blog are now so dense with information, that questions and complaints previously addressed are getting recycled by newbs. This is very annoying for the writers. Step it up, people.
The writers are getting testy.
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Intense eye contact is a display of dominance. Women love that shit if they’re attracted to you.
Direct eye start = intensity.
Intensity = passion. Maybe even dangerous passion.
Dangerous is always good.
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Then there is also this:
http://www.cracked.com/article_19194_6-intimate-details-you-can-tell-just-by-looking-at-someone.html
The last one confirms what you say about status=distracted.
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It would save you some hassle if you didn’t worry about clarifying things for the aspies. It’s not like they’re going to use this advice, anyway.
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Clarification is good.
Repeating Golden advice
also, good.
So much of Game is just erasing even once basic rules of politeness.
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If you’re spitting game and locking eyes she won’t normally look away unless you run your mouth. If she looks away or fiddles with something, it is time for the forearm grab (slightly more then gentle but not rough) to maintain dominance. Never hesitate to claim her space and move her around.
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Ah the bane of every advice/game website. At some point you’ve said it all. It’s up to people to go practice it. But that’s not what happens. What happens is someone new comes along with a new twist on it all and people jump on that band wagon, constantly reading and learning, never actually doing anything. That’s why it’s an evergreen market.
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…God complex’d authors?
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Maybe it’s time to write that book, Roissy.
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So how do you know when a girl needs signs of attainability???? After you busted a few of her shit tests? How does a girl change her behavior when she wants some bonding??????????????
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What’s up with all of the “pimp” referencing lately? I understand that black men have natural game, but I really don’t care to fashion anything in my life based on sub-barbarian African-American culture. The only worthwhile, sophisticated thing that ever came out of that was jazz and everything else has been destructive and tribal.
P.S. The only reason black guys have a rep for being mack daddies is that they hit on anything and everything that moves, with no regard to beauty, acceptable weight, or anything else resembling a standard.
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@simon
yea they should post more political stuff
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If questions and comments are being recycled, perhaps that has something to do with a lack of organization. There is quite a bit of information on this site. I think a table of contents (or even several) that orders the different posts and types of information would be helpful. It would probably be an interesting piece of game scholarship in that it would also give structure to a lot of the game material out there.
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@roissy
How should we react when an attractive female stranger gives you the “serial killer stare” (Assuming you’ve done nothing to warrant the attention). It scares the hell out of me, because I see it as a one night stand “shit test” by attractive women, played on me. If i pass it, I get laid without even knowing her name, if i fail it, I have to wait another 3 years to get this kind of opportunity (I played game in high school, not in college). Guys how would you react.
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as someone who as actually worked with prostitutes the eye contact thing has many layers. pimps are constantly looking around.. women can look him directly in the eye as consent for him to speak to her, if she accidentally gives too much eye contact but doesn’t want him to approach her, she is “recklessly eye balling him” and depending on the status of her pimp, may be forced to come out of pocket (give him all the $$ she has on her person at the time). that is why when a female decides to leave one pimp for another the statement that goes with that is: your bitch chose me”
i’m not sure how this would translate into real life situation, i for one like eye contact and if i am speaking with a man who doesn’t make a lot of eye contact, i believe that he is avoiding it because of a problem and in a sense he can not handle me
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@Dat_Truth_Hurts
I’m a black woman and I totally agree with your assessment.
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The biggest difference about the “serial killer stare” female strangers give me is “Plausible deniability”
I have had several cases where similar sex proposals by female strangers have been offered. Like when Women openly look at my crotch and then look into my eyes. Or they mention something that is happening and openly attach sexual connotations to that. e.g. I was a jackinthebox, my order # was 69, two girls boldly stated they wanted 69. These cases leave no room for misinterpretation, they are a done deal. I played greater beta male (or alpha wannabe), in high school, I was considered very desirable.
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Yeah, I don’t know about this. A guy who can’t focus his eyes on me while I’m talking is considered rude, plain and simple. I’m not going for that.
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Women did the “serial killer stare” shit test 3 times, to me in college (different women). I couldn’t hold the stare longer than they did, every single time. They were holding on to the stare longer than I was. Additionally, they caught me offhand every time, it was on friday’s but I had no plans for investing time in women, just for lots and lots of homework. I would look to the side and down (stupid I think, but what’s the alternative). Had the sex come with very little game, I would have been able to manage it in my schedule. (I had a friend with benefits, from high school when i was in college, however the sex wasn’t very predictable or as frequently as I would have liked).
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Raynasybelle, I totally agree. However the point these ‘alpha’ males are making is that they want you to feel inferior and uninteresting so that they can take control of your emotions. They think they are superior to you, and every woman. Miniature men strutting and preening and bragging about how they ‘control’ you.
Alpha males. Hahahahahaha. How second grade can you get?
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Eye contact was the first thing I practised when I began acquiring game skills and to this day I hold that my piercing glance is often what clinches the deal. The best thing about understanding the rules of eye contact is that it’s so simple, this article has covered it all and that says something for a game concept.
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@chad…. write a better blog, then…. whether or not this site is correct or works, its more afdicting and entertaining to read than harry potter
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Mike, if you seriously think I’m going to waste my time writing a blog that caters to skanky PUA’s and dehumanizing women, you are insane. That would require that I hate women, and I simply don’t, unlike most of the posters here. Thank you but I’d rather just watch the sociopathic parade.
[Editor: What was it like when you sprouted your first pube at age 24?
empowering, i bet.]
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“Maybe it’s time to write that book, Roissy.”
i’d buy.
good post. i think the podium effect can nullify the need for constant eye contact. girls are trying to stare at you while you’re speaking and looking around. i think eye contact is best when they are speaking. i’ve had what i thought was a dominance display turn into intimidation on her part when i took it too far. i like to turn it on and off.
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roishy, aka “Potomac Daddy”
knows one thing:
what topic gets them Fine Sistas to his blog
holla
(you can use the nickname, btw – in gratitude, F)
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Alpha males. Hahahahahaha. How second grade can you get?”
the whole world is second grade, friend. international politics has barely evolved beyond a high school popularity contest
[Editor: The children’s playground is everywhere.]
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chad…the hotter the girl that ive shared this blog with, the more addicted she is to it…and the more she demonstrates its truthfulness with her life or agrees with it outright…
having a better understanding of the previously unfamiliar is something to be praised not admonished….
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“A lot of aspy nerds read advice here…”
Shocker.
[Editor: Quite a few genuine alphas read here too, but they don’t go on and on with the blockheaded reading comprehension.]
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Advice for newbs:
Focus on basic social skills with all people, not just hot chicks. Talk to *everyone*.
I’ve said it before, but once you can chat up anyone anywhere, things like “context” and “socially appropriate” make a lot more sense when you actually know what these are before you try banging hordes of chicks.
PS, this also works if you’re working with women. They automatically start to defer to men who do this: they’ll back a more alpha-seeming male even if he engages in asshole behavior if he uses the right tone and method of engagement.
The fat chick at work you need to get along with? Instead of a disinterested piece of furniture, turn her into your ally in office politics. Socialize with her, but when you talk to her, address her directly and hold her attention; when she addresses you, follow the CR’s advice.
Do this consistently. Watch her bloatedness’ attitude change.
Weenie pansy guys in offices breed nothing but contempt.
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This might be off topic, but relevant nonetheless. Is it necessary to soften asshole behaviour once you are in a relationship with a girl? If so, how soft is too soft? If not, how do I handle her sincere complaints that I am too aloof and not bonding well with her? Help me here, because I am confused. I am a good looking guy that has always had ladies. But after I got dumped by one of the hootest girls I have dated, I happened upon your blog and realised I got dumped because I was TOO NICE which translated to BETA for her. Since then, I have started on the part to becoing a full Alpha and I am seeing very good results, thanks to you. But I feel guilty when I am a jerk to some very nice girls. I do not regret the way I treat them because I know what would happen if I become too soft. I just want to know how to balance it out to avoid losing some good ass because I was too aloof and uncaring. Thank you very much, Roissy and his band of enlightened commenters. Help a fellow soldier out.
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@ simon
Agreed. Lots of guys who fail to implement anything they read here keep reading the blog because it dehumanyzes women. Well, this blog actually shows what was obvious for 5 thousand years before 1968, that women are different from men. WHich equates with dehumanyzing for most
[Editor: Seeing reality as it is inevitably leads to a dehumanizing outlook. This is because a humanized outlook requires the support of an army of pretty lies. It is innately human to dress up the sordid underpinnings of existence with a load of ego assuaging cognitive biases and pedantic sophistry.]
You can see the deep hatred of women in how many people openly rejoice the effects of aging upon female beauty.
[I don’t rejoice in it. I would love for an anti-aging miracle that would spare the looks of young, beautiful women for decades beyond their natural expiration dates. A world teeming with female beauty is more heaven than heaven*. However, I do give shit to those aging bitter broads and free lunch feminists who like to spread lies by claiming that their deterioration has no effect on their dating options. A helpful reminder now and then is a healthy astringent for a muddled mind. Not to mention it restores balance to the force.
*spot the obscure pop culture ref.]
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More Human Than Human, White Zombie?
[Ed: got it.]
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Mars
Lighten up. It’s like driving stick. Alpha is for revving the engine and putting it in motion. Beta is for cruising in comfort. When you’re thrown a curve and want to corner, downshift. You win some and lose some. It’s not like it’s life or death. Some of you sound too grim, too determined. Even a hot 9 with a major career is just a girl. Soon another one will take her place.
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A girl once told me “I shouldn’t look at her like that.”
Next day, she was feeling me up in the stairwell.
Eye contact and a knowing smile speak volumes, and half of it is the girl’s projection.
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gig
You are like a ventriloquist’s dummy.
Wake the fuck up.
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Sometimes I use Roissy’s words in a pickup but since I’m aspy I put them out of context.
Like the one girl I told to assuage dez nuts.
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I, for one, just started reading this blog a few months ago. There are just so many posts, even though I’ve spent time in the archives, nobody can know the whole thing like the writer does.
When’s the post on Dominique Strauss-Kahn coming? Total alpha who apparently got framed. Although it’s hard to feel bad for the head of the IMF.
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“Stare with intensity, melt them into the earth”
Digital Budda
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“‘”More human than human” is our motto. ” – Dr. Eldon Tyrell [Blade Runner]
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>>A lot of aspy nerds read advice here … and they try to hammer that advice into every conceivable hole, not realizing that context matters and advice that is appropriate for one situation may not be so under different circumstances.
That’s more a question of empathy. Dumb slimy people lack it, so they’ll make these mistakes. Smart aspies pick up on things like that much quicker.
>Focus on basic social skills with all people, not just hot chicks. Talk to *everyone*.
Totally agree. Social grace comes down to experience. In my experience, people who lack it either have never had direct one on one social experiences, or were so dumb that they couldn’t decode the few they did have. It’s a question of empathy more than anything else.
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You are like a ventriloquist’s dummy.
So you can start with the applauses now!! But try to avoid getting yourself into a mess by whistling at the same time because doing both may exceed your cognitie capacity!
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Prime advice as always. Another Killer technique is to lock your eyes into a new girl’s eyes the First second you spot her. It’s magic.
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“Maybe it’s time to write that book, Roissy.”
Book? It’s time to run for POTUS, CR.
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Yeah i agree with other readers….write the fucking book.
And if it makes you a shedload of cash….good!
You deserve it for the value you give here.
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Tinderbox is mostly correct. I must make one slight correction though. Jazz sucks. No one actually likes it, they just pretend to.
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@Ave Veritas
You must feel so smart, *knowing* that the human race made jazz up to make white people feel better about themselves.
Has the thought ever crossed your mind that it didn’t start out that way so at least some people actually do enjoy it?
Or do you have a superior theory about the origins of Jazz too?
Oh and yes, to *prove* your point that no-one likes it and only white people like it now:
I am, god forbid, white.
For all the long and late hours I listen to it while working/reading, it must be a sad awakening for me that human beings cannot enjoy Jazz except for their ego.
wow, did I go through a lot of painful hours of ego-boosting there.
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Pimps are social outcasts who are ‘dominating’ marginal women living at best, marginal and dangerous lives.
[Editor: Define marginal. The ho in that last scene was pretty damn hot. A lot of men would want to tap her marginal ass.]
Forgive me, Roissy, but people in such circumstances have more to learn from us than we from them.
[Pimps are losers by societal standards, and I don’t think that bothers them in the least.]
Sure, this is a get laid blog but, jeez. What’s next? A book about table manners from Al Capone?
[Power is an aphrodisiac. Even the unseemly varieties of power.]
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Fuddy Duddy Game is the future. With Fuddy Duddy Game, you don’t even have to keep your hoes in line because women think boredom is this new exotic “thing” they’ve never experienced before. OMG – boredom? That’s SO mysterious!!!
But Fuddy Duddy Game is not for everybody! It takes incredible verbal skills, charisma, body language, facial expressions, and hand movements (alphas ALWAYS move their hands). You have to enjoy being a stick-in-the-mud. You have to rain on people’s parades with a smile on your face!
The key to Fuddy Duddy Game is 100% commitment to Fuddy Duddy Game. You can’t half-ass it. You have to keep the act going day to day, week to week, month to month. Once she is locked in your world of boredom, going to the zoo will seem like Las Vegas!
[Editor: Next week – Rolls of Blubber Game. A how-to guide for the BBW to meet Mr. Right Now.]
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When are you coming out with a book?
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@ED
“It is innately human to dress up the sordid underpinnings of existence with a load of ego assuaging cognitive biases and pedantic sophistry.”
True dat.
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@Feh
Thanks man. I get it now. So, basically, I neg, qualify and be at my asshole best until she succumbs and starts seeing me as an Alpha. Then I soften it up and make her enjoy me. Whenever she shit-tests me, I kick into jerk mood and deflect the shit test, then relax into Comfort Game and wait for then next shit test to unleash the hibernating jerk inside. Correct me if I’m wrong anywhere.
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It was a joke, fag. Now go back to listening to the notes they’re NOT playing.
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Hire a professional and quit playing games with people’s lives….idiots.
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A good stare is a quality of leaders and a tool for power. Not only with women.
There is a difference between staring like a beta who drools for a girl and an intelligent stare, like you are thinking about many things while she speaks. Girls will often stop babbling when facing such a stare. Think 007 Daniel Craig.
Looking distracted and unable to focus makes you look childish. First time I disagree with Roissy.
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Side note: see what a transformation into an alpha looks like in the movie Limitless.
Unfortunately, there is no pill for that.
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Mars, whoever you replied to is right. Don’t bond with her, no matter how much you want to, make her bond with you. It’s the only way to have a happy, lasting, relationship.
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Freud’s question was ‘what do women want?’ The answer is that they want you to figure out what they want to do and then tell them to do it. They don’t want any responsibility. they want the man to take it. If it turns out good, they did it. If it turns out bad, you told them to do it. If you can do this, even if you make mistakes, your woman will love you.
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I have developed an eye contact method when talking to two or more girls at once using this article and one of the commandments of poon. First, the article says looking distracted causes the girl to try to get your attention. Also one of the commandments says to make a girl think your more interested in another girl. So, when talking to two ore more girls, you don’t look at the one that is speaking to you. You look at one of the other girls.
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