To praise, or not to praise? “seeking truth” asks:
The transition from sleeping often with women of assorted beauty and quality, over the past 8 years, to recently establishing a longer-term serious relationship with what I consider quite a valuable women is an interesting dilemma. Clearly there are long-term issues to excessively praising a woman, as constant exposure to praise will naturally lead one to lower the value of praising party, through over-exposure. However, when one is happy it is easy and natural to express the reasons for ones happiness. What is the balance?
What is your take on the long-term potential of a relationship strategy that involves praise for a woman’s strong points – Fun loving, Funny, Quick, Smart, Loving, Affectionate, and Attractive in large helpings of each, with a somewhat raunchy, nasty, perverted objectification of her as a sex object required to submit/please, along with occasional reminders of how successful and easy it has been to create hook-up situations?
For example, saying i love you and the same breath telling her to practice stretching so she can be manipulated for an easier pounding during an upcoming trip. Does the sexual objectification offset the Betazoid aspects of praise?
I am finding the application of game interesting and looking to better understand its various implementations to sort out a comfortable role for it in relationships.
Here are three key seduction maxims to live by.
Better to err on the side of too much boldness than too little.
Better to err on the side of too much assholery than not enough.
Better to err on the side of too little praise than too much.
Do you know what happens to guys who cravenly praise their girlfriends day in and day out? They get dumped. Or tossed into sexual solitary confinement. Or taken for granted, if they’re lucky.
Do you know what happens to guys who are stingy with their praise? They get more sex than they can handle. They also get some drama, but… would you rather deal with drama or getting dumped?
I hope this lesson has reached home. Man, I have known guys who:
1. never complimented their GFs’ looks
2. never complimented their GFs’ smarts
3. never complimented their GFs’ personalities
but who had their GFs wrapped around their fingers. Even funnier, their GFs complimented *them* all the time, and all they answered in return was a head nod or a “you bet”. Isn’t love grand?
Now this doesn’t mean you have to go ice cold aloof ninja to sustain a loving relationship. As men, when we love a woman, we feel urges to compliment her. It’s a natural by-product of wanting to sex her hot bod with extreme defilement. And, it makes us feel good to throw her a bone of flattery. But betas completely surrender themselves to this urge, and it costs them. Alphas channel this urge, and it pays dividends. The Goldilock’s Principle is definitely in play. Allow me to open a window into a woman’s head, so you can see how your praise is received by her subterranean neuronal rhythms.
Excessive praise ===> “I can do better than him”
No praise ===> “He doesn’t love me”
Just the right kind and amount of praise ===> “I love him”
The first one will corrupt your LTR. The second one will corrode your LTR, but only after a very long time has passed. The third one will feed her hamster juuuuust enough pellets to keep her wondering, guessing, loving, and desiring.
There is a flattery balance to strike that won’t DLV yourself, and here are some guidelines to reaching that balance:
1. Never praise your girlfriend from a position of weakness.
There’s no worse time to lavish your woman with compliments than when she’s giving you the cold shoulder. But, men being men and unable to comprehend the maddening illogic of the female mind, that’s usually the time when they can’t stop praising their girlfriends. She’s snapping at you? Butter her up! She’s withholding sex? Ring up the excessive compliments! She’s being a raging bitch? Tell her how great she is! And then plead forgiveness of your sins!
Lord almighty, is this what the church of white knightery teaches men nowadays? You couldn’t do more harm to your cause had you tucked your junk between your legs, kneeled and begged her to touch your pee pee from behind.
The absolute WORST time to flatter your girl is when she is making your life miserable. Why would you reward bad behavior? Make like the pussy whisperer and train your woman not to crap in your face. Betas have no game except cloying flattery and “””supportiveness”””, so their instinct is to turn to that in times of turmoil and layer it on thick as can be. And you know the gruesome results of that: the woman feels even more repulsed by his presence.
No, when you praise or compliment or act supportive, ALWAYS do it from a position of strength. If you’re wondering when that is, it’s when she’s fawning over you, or begging you to irrigate her furrow as you brush your dick tauntingly across her pink eggplant, or singing your praises to her friends, or just generally acting like a sweet, feminine woman in your company.
2. Never be consistent in how, or how often, you flatter your girlfriend.
Two predictable compliments a day, like a doctor’s order, is going to get tiring real fast. She should never know when you might deign to make her feel loved. And she should never hear the same damn turn of phrase every day either. The best times to praise your girl are when she least expects it, and that is usually when something else is happening and her attention is distracted from “you and her”. I like to toss out a compliment when she’s just dribbled food onto her blouse, or whisper a loving bon mot in her ear as she’s trying on clothes in front of the mirror. Unpredictability is as arousing to women as full firm tits are to men. Which leads to…
Maxim #55: The training of the woman distills to this essence: Punish her bad behavior consistently, reward her good behavior intermittently.
Enjoy your vagina deluge.
3. Flatter her in public.
You know what really flutters a girl’s heart? When you say something nice about her in front of her friends. That’s a relationship boost and a social status boost in one. Nonsexual public praise is the safer bet, but sexual public praise, if done right, can make her heart explode.
4. Praise those things about her that will redound to your benefit.
Sure, it’s easy to lapse into praising a woman’s most obviously enticing features, like her eyes or luscious lips. But she has little control over those advantages she enjoys. But if you praise her attractive behavior… “I love they way you’re so affectionate. It’s really sexy and so rare to find in a woman nowadays”… you encourage more of that positive behavior from her in the future.
Similarly, if you go the physical route, praising your girl’s ass will have the most impact when she just got back from the gym. She’ll want to keep going to the gym to earn more of that praise.
5. Use adjectives.
Chicks dig the adjective. Lots of them. Nice eyes? Meh. Orbs of liquid blue allure? Plow me! Caveat: Lawyercunts tend to balk at adjectives, because they are unfeminine and have incipient clit dicks. Just tell them you’re gonna rape them in two, and watch their love pour forth.
6. Always substitute nonverbal praise for verbal praise when you can.
Pinching her ass and smiling is more effective than telling her she has a great ass.
7. Substitute “we” for “you” in your compliments, when you can.
It’s the difference between putting her on a pedestal, and leaving a spot for her on your pedestal.
8. Romantic contrast is king.
If you always tell your girl “you’re so pretty”, she will expect the same endearment next time. If you always tell your girl “you’re ass is so righteous I’m gonna fill it with my religion”, she will expect the same perversion next time. But if you sweetly woo her “I love the way we kiss” as you’re leaving for work in the morning, and then hoarsely whisper to her “your ass is so hot my dick wants to wear it as a sombrero” when you return in the evening, she’ll have two orgasms, one for her and one for her hamster. Squeak!
9. Rarity is the glow of clits.
If you get a great reaction from your flattery, don’t beat it to death. Stop, drop and change the subject. You’d be amazed how many betas will sabotage their brief moments of glory by returning over and over to the same well. Any sort of praise of a woman ought to be, by natural habit and sincere discernment, a rare and welcomed thing. Most men have the problem of overestimating the right amount of praise. The right amount is much less than men think. If I had to estimate, one week between compliments is a good rough number to shoot for within an established LTR. Whatever number, it should never be more than the number of compliments *she* lavishes on you. Abide the Golden Ratio (see the 16 Commandments at the top of the blog). Note: raunchy talk is technically not praise, so you can raunch it up often without worrying about DLVing yourself, though it’s a good idea to dish that out irregularly, for the same reasons you would be spare in your nonsexual flattery.
10. Finally, praise feminine qualities, not masculine qualities.
Do you want to turn your sweet petunia into a proud feminist with a jagged fault line running straight through her soul? Then why are you complimenting her “ambition”? Men with no clue often think women want to hear what they would like to hear. No. Women want to hear that you acknowledge and love their unique gifts — their femininity, their generosity, their softness, their sexiness. It’s similar to how men get tired of hearing their women praise their “muscles”. Ladies, you really want to strike the gooey center of your man’s heart? Tell him you love how he commands a room. Bam. You’ve just won an extra 30 seconds of lovemaking.
I hope this clears the matter for you. Compliments are garnishes, not the main dish. Nobody wants to eat a full plate of parsley. And remember, disapproving of her flaws is as crucial to LTR management as offering praise of her… talents. More crucial, I’d say, because a missed compliment won’t lower your value like a missed reprimand will.
Tldr; The female id views all communication first through the lens of status assessment, and second for what is rationally intended.
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“10. Finally, praise feminine qualities, not masculine qualities.”
but what if your girrlfirend girlfirend has a really big cockas? lzozozozoozoz like firepwoers gf? lzozozozozoz
if i was with firepowerz girrifriend i would say, “dats a nice lotsa cockas!” lzozozozozoozozozzo
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hey heartsistes!!!
i am trying to get american aparrell (Assparrel) and urban outfitters (buttfitters) to cary my t-shirt s zlzlzllzlzlzozlzoz
http://cafepress.com/greatbooksformen
lzozozolzoozozlzo
dey would go great with your hipster skinny jeas with da hipster skinny jeans
and ass so many of the guys dress like girls these days tehy wshould feel free to buy the girl’s shirtz so as to wear produdoldly and dcelebratrtre our decockaracy zlzloozlzlzozzlzoz
democracy – cockas = decockracy lzolzlzozozozozolozoz
univeritysty – great books for men = student debt hedge fund debauhcing both the culture and the cureency lzozolzolzozlzo
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lzozozzozozlzo
p.s. firebpowerz grirflfirndz. dats is a nice lostas cockas, but please keep it from my butthole agholeelozlzlz lzozlzoz as i don’t want no buttthexting like tucker max rhmeys with goldman z sax zlzozozlzo likes 2 do lzozlzozz
one thingz you have to wonder about dudes who butthext chcicks
if instead of a chcickz butthole, it was a dudez buttholsesz, would da butthexting dude know the difefrence?
maybe they butthext sodomize a girlz so dad dey can saitaiate tehir longing for da male aholezzz ? lzozozl
anwho my people wroet lotas a greta bok againsts esoosodominzing girlths and sosodomizing future wives and taping i ts secrteley without tehri tocctheennet lzolzlzzo
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If your Game is up to the task
replete with six-pack Game
and Tom Brady Game
– YOU, can do
anything
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Be like da Diceman…
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“But, men being men and unable to comprehend the maddening illogic of the female mind…”
Hehe. What I love about this blog and other like it is that the writing is now starting to mirror the way men wrote about women in Mark Twain’s era. And while naysayers might call this line of thinking “retro,” I call it honesty and liken it to the way men thought about women before their minds were filled with post-Freudean politically correct pseudo-intellectual bullshit.
There is a huge, huge blindspot in the way men view women today. It comes down to this: do you really think you’re smarter than Washington or Jefferson? Or Lincoln? Do you think you’re more clever than Franklin? Or more brave that the men who started this country? No? Than what makes you think you’re more “enlightened” than them when it comes to women? Because they didn’t think women should vote. There’s some serious food for thought there that ties into this post.
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I used to argue this in the 70’s, during the height of Wimmen’s Lib hysteria. My argument was: “For the last 10,000 years, the status if women was somewhere between a domestic farm animal and a whipped dog. Who am I to argue with the wisdom of the ages?” Much hilarity ensued.
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Strong
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+1
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Do you really think you’re smarter than Freud?
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The only thing Freud got right: penis envy.
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The kikes have a rule NEVER to compliment a goy… Smart fuckers.. works better with women who are even less deserving. Quick and handy rule: Whenever you feel like you should compliment them DON’T. Works everytime.
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Where are you coming up with this bullshit?
The many, many* Jewish women I’ve bedded and/or flirted with have been MORE complimentary than the uptight white bitches whose Christian brainwashing has them tied up in anti-sexual knots. Let’s try and keep these discussions realistic, shall we?
If anyone doesn’t dole out compliments its the church-going wenches. And don’t start in about Jewish feminists; they’re just a small subset of the ethnic group and IMO still more tolerable than the bible belters.
* That says something right there, doesn’t it?
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Who gives a fuck how many kikesses let you slide in their twats.. a compliment from them ?!! haha who cares what they do or say. The rule about compliments comes from the ‘evil’ Talmud.. one of numerous shitty little things that give kikes a leg up over goys… and don’t get me wrong krist-insanity is jewish too.. just a lot shittier. If you want civilization, stick to anti-marxist atheists or doped-up female ‘naturals’.
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Once again you never cease to amaze me, especially with the first point. No person should be rewarded if they do something wrong, and this goes true for both men and women.
When you flatter your woman when she’s the one making your life hell is analogous to complementing yourself for failing an important test. She’ll just take your “words of encouragement” as extra motivation to fuck up your life even more.
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Agreed. If you’re this reserved over a dude blogger you’ve never even laid eyes on, your stoic control around an hb8 bending over a pool table must be something to behold.
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Not sure what you’re implying, but I’ll take it as it is.
Better than the million comments people tell me about “finding the right one eventually” anyways.
I’m sick of that shit.
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“Not sure what you’re implying, but I’ll take it as it is.”
not sure either. but he consistently proffers gratuitous monologues about how witty and amazing he is.
in college (not too long ago) i knew a guy who drove an e36 3-series. he bragged about it whenever he could. i also had a college bud who drove a vantage roadster. he let it speak for itself.
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Agree with FP. Thanks to you, we will never see naked pictures of heartsite conquests, assured we are amazed enough. Many who cannot apply the information will be forced, once again, to browse the free section of popular porn sites.
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This is OT but I need to pass this along. Two women singing with astonishing honesty about the hypergamy trap, not that they call it that, female delusion and hitting the wall. Also, hilarious. Could be worth a post on it’s own.
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This is probably the fifth or sixth time this has been posted in the comments.
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Sonofabitch. Read every word or go home is I guess the lesson here.
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It’s always funny! They need a sequel with a “39” in there.
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In the video for “39” they’ll be swarmed by cats.
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I’d rather listen to Fran Dresher recite Single Ladies than hear that blonde’s sing-screed.
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Pretty funny. For some reason I got momentarily aroused when the blonde called the brunette a cunt.
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All men must have the instinct or drive to praise a girl that they are wild about. But this has to be done in a mutual manner or it’s omega drone signalling. Awhile back xsplat and I commented on gushing game, you know, when it’s ok to lavish praise on a girl, when both parties are new and into each other, then it’s fine, right? Do it for the endorphin rush of being able to tell a girl you want to eat sushi off of her ass when it makes her happy and she’s doodling your name with hearts when she should be working, don’t do it if there’s any doubt, but it’s not a good long term strategy because you may praise her on a bad day or in an attempt to spark romance and that could kill the deal.
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Why eat sushi off her ass when she’s sporting the world’s original sushi roll between her thighs?
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First date. She was DHVing to me about her projects in the bank where she works, smart investments, and how she was going to get rich. I was showing no interest at all, bored, not asking a single question. And then, I interrupted and asked her: “can you cook?”. The immediate reaction was kind of shock and little indignation, but the following results were great. It´s tip number 10 on today´s post, but I´m sure I read it before in the Chateau.
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This praising thing can be a double-edged sword.
For example, the other day my wife was having a bout of the blues… looking at herself in the mirror and sighing, sadly saying how her hair was starting to turn gray, and how her figure wasn’t quite what it once was.
I could see she was in the doldrums, so I thought I’d cheer her up with a compliment.
“True, dear… but your eyesight’s still perfect!”
Didn’t really worked out for me.
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Nice joke.
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Say that while grabbing her ass and it might work.
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Pick out the alpha fucks and beta bucks in this gem:
http://www.huffingtonpost.com/megan-baldwin/boyfriends-why-ive-never-_b_1555739.html
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Wow, the hamster at full speed. Gee , sometimes I can sort of understand the MGTOW nutjobs and their “all women are silly scum” mentality.
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That shit makes me admire the taliban.
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Wow. That girl has serious issues. The good news is that most girls aren’t quite as nutty as her.
Did anyone understand what the hell she was going on about with the paragraph about chopped salads? Is the salad a metaphor for something? Or is she just engaging in a random stream-of-consciousness ramble like a homeless dude on a street corner? Because that salad thing makes no damn sense.
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She was giving the beta a shot. Girls know we should like the beta but we can’t figure out why we don’t. So, since he talked about the chopped salad in his email to her she went to see what it was about in a sort of round about way of giving the nice guy a chance. Unsurprisingly, she was bored.
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Salad is hamster fuel.
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That is… magnificent: Unleashing her twelve-story hamster to rampage through Los Angeles.
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Amazing.
Truly amazing.
Few female composed articles have so clearly supported the chateau-worldview as this one has.
“Call Me Maybes”? Did she get that from that god-forsaken song?
Western-civ is done
lolzolzolzolzolzolzlz
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Read Megan’s blog about her mother deserting the family. This woman is damaged goods.
If she wants to be rid of annoying betas, she could just send her essay to them. They won’t call back, and there might be one less annoying beta in the world.
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Her prior article was a recollection of how her mother abandoned their family and her father was unreliable.
Stay away from crazy.
Stay away from crazy who wants to air a family’s dirty laundry in a worldwide newsite.
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“Make like the pussy whisperer…”
Haha. Great chateau link. Color me unsurprised.
Dog whisperer is a great game resource, at least body language-wise. And it’s comical when cesar millan tries to teach alpha body language to women.
It’s also scary to realize to what extent what works with dogs usually works with women. That’s why dogs should be allowed to vote. Because I believe in equality.
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I heard he is divorcing his wife, Is she beautiful?
I need to know if all that Body language training managed to give a HB10.
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I saw his wife in one show and thought she was quite plain, even homely… and she seemed to have an attitude. I think he even named one of his product lines after her and gave her co-credit for the ideas.
I always found that strange about Milan… he seemed quite the beta around her… and always seems to pay the expected lip service to the ladies being the boss of the house.
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I thought his lip service was just “lip service” not his real conviction.
I’m disapointed in him.
Someone should tell him to watch 1000 hours of wild west movies and 50’s movies to teach him what a real man is.
Share some more ideas because I think he deserve a chance to be the “real” alpha male for once in a relationship.
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40’s movies are more universally good for that than fifties ones are.
He should watch Humphrey Bogart movies. Or for more recent ones, Clint Eastwood ones. There’s the great trilogy High Plains Drifter, The Unforgiven, and Pale Rider. For a current star, anything with Russell Crowe in it.
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This is a C. Heartiste great.
All I’d add, which is implied in what Heartiste said, but I’d like to make explicit, is calibrate to the particular girl.
The goal is to be dominant over her and alluring, but not out of reach and likely she thinks to leave her as not worthy. Enough comfort is necessary. It depends upon the girl and your relationship dynamics with her. In the first instance this is SMP valuation comparisons, but in the finer tuned usual reality it’s also heavily about her and your personalities.
Keep her hungry but also semi secure, in a LTR. Semi. But not, not at all.
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Think of it as an LTR Red Queen Effect. She should be running hard to stay in the same place.
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I’m pretty sure Maya sent this to the daily mail:
http://www.dailymail.co.uk/femail/article-2153424/BEL-MOONEY-Im-40-single-Why-dont-men-I-like-fancy-me.html
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Why the hell hasn’t my comment appeared? I’ve been commenting her for 4+ years. Not once criticized by the blog owner. What’s going on? Irritating as hell.
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It’s ok. Every once in a while the spam filter picks some up. It’ll show up in a bit. Though, since it’s Friday, it may not get pulled out until tomorrow.
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Thanks, you’re a sweetie.
A very married sweetie I realize, but still.
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Thank you.
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As women age, do their physical attraction triggers change (i’m talking purely physical, not seeing anything more than a picture)? Are we better able to pick an alpha male from just a picture? I ask because I find men such as Bruce Willis and Kurt Russell FAR more physically attractive than any Ashton Kutcher or pretty male model, even if the male model is muscular. Or does this have more to do with older men likely being more established due to their age and experiences?
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Ahh bugger. I meant to post that in the attraction post. I will post it there as well. Apologies.
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worth noting that the average woman does this much better than the average man.
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The former baby.
The former.
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I’m reminded of an old maxim of Ross Jeffries: “Combine commands with compliments.”
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yah! i do this all da timesz!!!!
“Nice hairz suck my cockas!”
“Like your shews spead your cheeks zlozozo”
“you have pretty eyes let me dot them dot your i’s lzozoozz”
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These appear to be sound axioms. It reminds me of something I heard a foreign man (Croatian, I think) on tv relay from his childhood. He said “when I was a child, my father would give me weekly hidings for the things I did wrong. He would also give me a small allowance. Even when we were well-behaved we would recieved the hidings. Sometimes he would forget to give us our allowance, but he would never forget the hidings”. Rewards cease becoming rewards when they are a sure thing.
I will follow them with the exception of number 3. I shudder at the thought of saying something complimentary and having her friends say “awwww”. I would feel the need to stomp on a small animal afterward to banish the tender sentimentality that might still be clinging to my soul.
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AWWWWWWW
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awesome post
funny as fuck.
Yea all ya got to do is deny even skittles sometimes and she will remember that shit for life.
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on the other you also need to go overboard and use imagination and make big to do shit she isn’t expecting and she will also remember that for life.
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Another technique I use is the over-blown praise delivered with a wry smile….
I gamed an HB9 at a recent party. As I was leaving I went to say goodbye.
Her: Oh? Leaving so soon…
Me: Pause…low voice…no smile: We danced, what else is there left for me here?
Her: Big smile…
She later added me on facebook. When I saw her at the club the next week she approached me iimmediately.
The thing about praise or compliments is that they need to sound sincere, or if you’re really stuck…they need to sound like you’re forcing yourself to say something nice.
The “forced sounding compliment” sounds like a neg.
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And you were being non-needy.
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Yes…that’s the key….sometimes the girl will say: “Really?”
I pause…then say:
“No…I totally made that up to sound nice….”
It’s a surprise, somewhere her was written the beta-switch technique…It’s something like that….
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As a guy who has been in a 16-year relationship with a (foreign) woman, I will affirm that pretty much all of this hits the mark, in my experience. I mention this because this post is, consciously or not, about LTR game.
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Behold the fruits of feminism: women are f’in depressed. 1 in 10 (!) white women are on mood lifting drugs.””””’
i think it higher than that even my therapist said she was on the shit before.
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This week I went up to visit some friends in another part of my state. One owns a moderately successful coffee shop in a small resort town where he attracts a lot of 9+ twenty-something scenester poon by putting on shows and the like.
One caught my eye with a tattoo around her thigh of a garter belt with a derringer tucked into it, all in shades of pink, enticingly half-displayed by a black lace miniskirt. Above, a flannel coat and low-cut black top to match. She had the logo of Viijay Prozak’s A.N.U.S. tattooed on her foot, a Kali Maa pendant around her neck, ink black hair cut like that goth kid on South Park always flicking his bangs out of his eyes, and very obvious nervous tics.
Several red flags, then, but I figured from the tattoos she might be worth talking to, and so it was — for the next two hours in fact. By the end of it she was enthralled, her word, by my conversation, touched off by flatly replying “Yes” to her question, “Are you a Fascist?”
But as I sat there at the folding table outside smoking my American Spirits and trying to bridge the abyss from my cognitive environment to hers, turning the world right side up for her in my meager haphazard fashion, I felt indescribably low and absurd. What was I after? did I even want to be in bed with this obviously sick little creature despite her compelling physical charms? what’s in it for me after all? am I rationalizing inability, or is this feeling of banality an accurate assessment of the cost-benefit structure in dealing with her?
I watched this thing flicking her hair, shuffling her feet, chain-smoking, her tongue moving faster than her brain, all backwardness, depression, self-alienation, cynicism and defeat — and even when I saw the sparkle in her eyes as we agreed that she would follow me to a bar in her own vehicle, the next moment I was back with my buddy and I sped off completely unmindful of her behind us.
The moral here, I guess, is that these are seriously sick beings we have to treat with. They’ve become so backward, I am genuinely more revolted than thrilled by the prospect of laying one.
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“all backwardness, depression, self-alienation, cynicism and defeat”
I ought to add that this goes for me as well, to the last letter. The difference is simply that I don’t want to compound it all by mingling with a species who exhibits the same dysfunction but affects to be content with it, and would nail me to a cross for suggesting matters should be otherwise.
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You actually met a girl with an A.N.U.S. tattoo?
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Funny eh?
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if it’s only 1 in 10, i’d be shocked. in my experience, it’s more like 1 in 3.
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Deep level question. for the commenters and host…
Did my mom make me a Beta? afterall where do Betas come from? how are they trained? who trains them and for what end???
I “broke up” with my mom for a few years 10 years back, and in that time I got more action that in my whole life.. Why? because not one cell of my body cared about what any woman thought. I slashed and burned and was happy.
I am convinced that I grew up getting negged by my mom who was training me to be a beta from birth to look after her in old age.
Now I live on the other side of the country and am happy! ….. Any thoughts?….. did your mom make you a beta to serve her own ends?
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It ain’t just your mom. The school, the church, TV, government, media, etc.have their hand in keeping boys down.
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no dad?
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Just because someone gave birth to you doesn’t mean you owe them your life. Its a complex issue. My mother disowned me when I was three months pregnant because of a dispute between her and my ex-husband. It had nothing at all to do with me. Neither relationship was ever the same afterwards. I would gladly live on the other side of the country from both of them. Many mothers seem unwilling to let their children be adults and make their own decisions. I wonder what the mother/child traditions for cutting the apron strings were in the past and if this is a new or timeless issue.
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“Many mothers seem unwilling to let their children be adults and make their own decisions. I wonder what the mother/child traditions for cutting the apron strings were in the past and if this is a new or timeless issue.”
Yeah, I’m down with this line of thinking. I think his mom made him Beta because it kept him under mom’s control. The whole point of parenting should be to make yourself obsolete. But Baby Boomer parents didn’t get this and think they have to go on eternally parenting.
This may be because they’re jealous of younger people and therefore seek to destroy them, or because they have a need for total control. Or because they see their kids as “objects” and see the world and their kids as only ever revolving around themselves (a classic Boomer trait). But whatever the case, the apron strings used to be cut much earlier. The Greatest Generation parents couldn’t wait to be done with their kids and head off to Florida.
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“The whole point of parenting should be to make yourself obsolete.”
Very true. A parent who can’t let go could be an individual who is just controlling by nature or a person who is unsatisfied with her own life or child-rearing and therefore doesn’t feel like they’re done yet. Think of mothers who overnurse or who constantly interfere in their adult children’s lives overstepping their bounds. Maybe the Greatest Generation felt more entitled to freedom in their old age considering they put their lives on the line for it.
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I believe fathers can contribute to betaness as well, I’m 18, my parents are divorced, my mum lives 2 hours away and my father is a dominant alpha. I’ve always been a rule breaker, getting myself into trouble etc, but I believe mu father is trying to beta my brothers and I, the rules we have to follow, his house his rules sorta shit. I lost my license and am too scared to drive because of him, not scared of the police or the consequences. Am I being turned around into a beta by following his rules? Note I only live there because easy access to work and cheap living costs.
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“Am I being turned around into a beta by following his rules?”
Doubtful. You’ll likely adopt your fathers authoritative and alpha demeanor.
Kids take for granted how much they absorb from their parents. Unlikely to fully realize how much until older and out on one’s own.
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I’d say on the contrary. In my opinion, its alpha that he sets rules for you and it’ll actually be a good thing.
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“But, men being men and unable to comprehend the maddening illogic of the female mind……..”
And there you have it.
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Speaking from an LTR, if a 26 year old marriage counts, I can agree that a modicum of occasional praise is best. Be honest. If she cooks something ghastly, say so. If she looks like shit in a dress, say so. If she looks nice or cooks something tasty, give some praise. But don’t overdo it …
Women work to gain the approval of the man they love.
Don’t believe all that crap in the magazine arrticles. Women will get by very happily on very little praise. “Less is more.”
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Yuup. I probably give a bit more praise than you’re suggesting but then I’d guess you do too. The popular Anglosphere media and other culture goes SO overboard in urging / requiring / modeling men giving excessive praise even when it’s undeserved that one in the red pill know has a tendency to push back very hard against that.
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Maybe, but I never really got the blue pill in the first place. Boys born in Australia in 1955 didn’t get the blue pill, thank God. American men overvalue women.
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I only at most half was afflicted with the blue pill myself, mostly in the form of chivalry. I always believed that male dominance in intimate relations was the natural order of things, and necessary for women and men to feel strong attraction to each other.
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It’s very SIMPLE:
You PRAISE her when she does RIGHT by you.
You SCOLD her when she does WRONG by you.
It’s like training a dog that talks.
The real challenge is to recognize when she is violating your expectations so you can SCOLD her immediately. The real challenge is also to recognize when she is meeting your expectations so you can PRAISE her.
Don’t overcomplicate things. The best couples always follow this simple rule: I am the man I am in charge, you are the woman you are NOT in charge. You are to be submissive, feminine and obedient.
Period.
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I’ve got a cousin whose been dating the same dude for almost my whole life.(30 years!!!) They’re engaged but she wont wear his ring or marry him. I want him to leave her, find someone 20 years younger than my cousin and pop out a lot of children.
How do you deal with such a severe case of oneitis & betatude?
GBFM – What book should i read after the Illiad? I like that Helen calls herself a whore for what she did alpha fucks and beta bucks!! lolzlzzlz
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“How do you deal with such a severe case of oneitis & betatude?”
Go beat your head against a wall for ten minutes, for that’s about what you will accomplish in trying to pry him free.
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yea you can’t change it 30 years thats not that bad really if they together that long sheot
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Gbfm list:
1. Homer’s Iliad
2. Homer’s Odyssey
3. The Bible (Genesis, Exodus, Matthew to begin!)
4. Virgil’s Aeneid
5. Joseph Campbell’s The Hero With a Thousand Faces
6. Dante’s Inferno
7. Aristotle’s Poetic
8. Shakespeare’s Hamlet
9. Socrates’ Apology
10. Melville’s Moby Dick
11. The Declaration of Independence
12. The U.S. Constitution
King A list;
Sophocles’ Antigone
Aristophanes’ Lysistrata
Thucydides’ History of the Peloponnesian War
Plato’s Republic, Symposium, Gorgias, Laches
Aristotle’s Nicomachean Ethics, Politics, Rhetoric
Sun Tzu’s Art of War
Plutarch’s Parallel Lives
Augustine’s Confessions, City of God
Aquinas’ Summa Theologica
Thomas à Kempis’ Imitation of Christ
Ignatius of Loyola’s Spiritual Exercises
Machiavelli’s Discourses on Livy
Hobbes’ Leviathan
Milton’s Paradise Lost
Pascal’s Pensées
Rousseau’s Emile
Smith’s Wealth of Nations
Hamilton/Jay/Madison’s Federalist
Tocqueville’s Democracy in America
Dostoevsky’s Brothers Karamazov
Austen’s Pride and Prejudice
Baltimore Catechism, No. 2 (1885)
Nietzsche’s Beyond Good and Evil, Thus Spoke Zarathustra
Kipling’s Collected Poetry
Conrad’s Heart of Darkness
Boy Scouts of America Handbook (1911)
Catechism of the Catholic Church
United States Marine Guidebook of Essential Subjects
Mansfield’s Manliness
Bowman’s Honor: A History
H’s Crimson Arts
Rosie O’Donnell’s Find Me
I demand another list from CH and uh.
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lzozozlzozozoz
read homers lodysysyey!! duh!!!!
homer’s odysysey teaches that if you stand up to womenz you get to FUCK them lzozozozo
if you don’t stand up to dem dey turn you into pigs
yes homer was alomst as brrilliaaiant as heartistse lzozozozozo:
HOMER’S ODYSSEY:
“‘And I will tell you of all the wicked witchcraft that Circe will
try to practise upon you. She will mix a mess for you to drink, and
she will drug the meal with which she makes it, but she will not be
able to charm you, for the virtue of the herb that I shall give you
will prevent her spells from working. I will tell you all about it.
When Circe strikes you with her wand, draw your sword and spring upon
her as though you were goings to kill her. She will then be frightened
and will desire you to go to bed with her; on this you must not point
blank refuse her, for you want her to set your companions free, and
to take good care also of yourself, but you make her swear solemnly
by all the blessed that she will plot no further mischief against
you, or else when she has got you naked she will unman you and make
you fit for nothing.’ ”
-http://classics.mit.edu/Homer/odyssey.mb.txt
zlzozozozozoz
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I knew a couple like that. They had been engaged for fifteen years. They were notorious. I think the problem was that she was too wedded to her career in the Navy.
I saw photos of them from both ends of the fifteen years. He looked OK earlier, but like a whipped dog after fifteen years.
It was tragic.
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More relationship comments please Heartiste!
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Hey guys,
Have you heard that Ferdinand Bardamu of InMalaFide is going to close his blog?
http://www.groin.com/in-mala-fide-going-down/
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Sometimes the words you use are so deep and precise. Very eye opening when vague concepts even learned on the beat are explained by a sincere master when he sits to think. Just shared this blog with another disciple. He’ll go far as he is fairly alpha.
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BUAHAHA! Read it and weep, aging bitter feminazis.
“Pictured: Mary-Kate Olsen, 25, on cosy basketball date with Nicolas Sarkozy’s brother Olivier, 42”
http://www.dailymail.co.uk/tvshowbiz/article-2153268/Mary-Kate-Olsen-25-cosy-date-Nicolas-Sarkozys-brother-Olivier-42.html
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Good! Maybe he’ll feed her! Now, forget about him. Who’s the guy with the reading glasses! 🙂
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cocaine is a helluva drug..
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Oh, is that what it is? She and her sister both have just always looked so unhealthy to me. I didn’t know why. Its clear they are naturally slim, which is great, but something seemed off.
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Definitely has a coke/crack/crystal look. Culturally probably not crystal. As well she looks like she hasn’t washed her hair in a week. Shank city look.
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And I’ll note how Olivier is speaking into Mary-Kate’s ear while stroking her hair. Dominant yet affectionate. The Hamster Whisperer.
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C’mon. If a dildo had $10 mill – and its face on TMZ once a week
Mary Kate AND Asheley would fuck it
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Feh!
Julius Streicher was hung for printing less stereotypical pickelsnoot visages.
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Beta of the day:
“My girlfriend and I had been together for about three years, and I was sure she was the one I wanted to marry. Problem was, I didn’t exactly have enough money to get her a good engagement ring. So, in order to raise funds, I put my collection of baseball trading cards on eBay. We’re talking a collection that spanned, like, 20 years, thanks to some cards handed down by my dad. I was totally bummed to part with them because they were so important to me, but I really, really loved this girl. I ended up making more than enough money to pay for a ring. Problem was, when I got down on one knee, she told me that she couldn’t see spending the rest of her life with me. I should’ve stuck with Shoeless Joe Jackson.”
http://yahoo.match.com/y/article.aspx?articleid=12986&TrackingID=526103&BannerID=1338498
Ugh…
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hhaahhahahahahaaa
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“In latest news: Feminists decry puberty.”
A woman I know, 25 and not in sight of motherhood, tried arguing to me that anovulatory menstruation (a disease state usually occurring near menopause) is actually a stage of normal puberty — desperate to deny that teenage girls are physically fit to become mothers.
Her source: ” … some article on Wikipedia … ”
The worst part: She describes herself as anti-feminist …
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Alpha street cred beats wealth. Interracial affair with rapper ends marriage between UK’s two most powerful Jewish families, the Rothdchilds and the Goldsmiths:
http://www.dailymail.co.uk/femail/article-2153789/Rothschild-heiresss-marriage-Goldsmith-scion–falls-rapper-called-Jay-Electronica.html
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more flesh for the vultures of the chateau. this is a lesson that even being a billionaire will not exclude you from being cuckolded by an alpha rapper.
lozllozzlol
http://www.dailymail.co.uk/femail/article-2153789/Rothschild-heiresss-marriage-Goldsmith-scion–falls-rapper-called-Jay-Electronica.html#ixzz1wghiW5hw
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Ha!, pure gold. Heartiste please consider writing an article about this, it could be edifying stuff, that sweet beta face
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That article was tragic to read.
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Do you guys live under a rock? Another Jewess cuckolding her Jew husband is nothing new. He’s pretty lucky she’s just as rich as he is and he won’t have to pay any alimony.
Hopefully the rapper will marry her, cheat, get slapped by her, get her arrested, divorce her, and leave with half + alimony.
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Why, why get married? And, why, why, fall romatically in love with a woman?
Only naive men do such things. He’ll be blamed. She will be lauded for being liberated. He’ll pay for this. Just other annoying nice guy getting what he deserves.
Imagine how this would play out if the sexes were reversed. We know. Just think of what happened to Tiger Woods.
And we make fun of MGTOW types?
Regarding women, I didn’t believe in “game” when I found this site several years ago. Now, it’s all I believe in.
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Let’s be real here. Too little love can make a man feel empty alas too much love can make you weak doesn’t it
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“And, why, why, fall romatically in love with a woman?”
Because its FUN! 🙂 And done intelligently creates HAPPINESS! 🙂
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So you’ve dated , romanced and loved a lot of women ?
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lol, no. But are you seriously saying men don’t enjoy being in love, and being with a woman doesn’t bring them happiness?
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@ Geisha Kate:
What’s that got to do with marriage?
Being in love with a woman, and being with her, are fine…but neither one requires marriage. This man’s life would be a hell of a lot easier if he’d never married this slut.
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Summary: children trying to raise children with too much money they didn’t earn themselves. Yeah, its brutal for the guy and the kids. Things can get ugly when people don’t have ordinary limitations or they can’t hold themselves to standards. This relationship with the rapper will go nowhere and it all will have been for nothing 😦
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” But are you seriously saying men don’t enjoy being in love, and being with a woman doesn’t bring them happiness? ”
I can’t speak for men as a gender only for myself. I was in love once , my freshman year of college. I count it among the most miserable experiences of my life. Since then I’ve learned “who cares less, wins” . Anymore I don’t believe myself capable of attachment, let alone love. The goosebumpy rollercoaster of romance has since been reduced to formulas based on probabilities calculated by experience.
..Though you’d never know that if I were gaming you.
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Love is not a competition 🙂
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To answer your questions: Yes and Yes.
However, the end product is usually extreme disappointment, at the minimum. At the maximum, he gets completely screwed over. It ain’t worth it.
And once you decide women are unfit for marriage or romance, they have only one other possible function. (And I don’t mean as a paid dinner companion.) Thus, game, especially the mindset that goes with it, is essential.
As an historical aside, Napoleon, when a young officer, almost committed suicide over an unhappy love affair. He decided that action was the antidote to self-destruction. The rest, as they say, is history.
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Well, not to diminsh what anyone has gone through, but I don’t think anybody should give up. The romantic in me simply refuses to die. Of course, hope alone does not bring results, and sometimes its necessary to relinquish it altogether, so I understand the comments to that effect.
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If you game the right woman what is not to love? Done correctly its like part of your own body which moves the way you think. If not fed properly, it can become cancerous. In that case, you cut out the cancer, realizing you fed it wrong acting like a beta. Don’t make her fear for herself and her progeny with your own weakness. When a normal woman acts up, she is just the messenger because its really nature that is canceling your ass.
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Well said.
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I would think the motherfucking Rothschild’s would be able to reel in their own from embarrassing their family in such a way.
I always imagined such super-billionaire types are full red-pill in private. Would of assumed they had hammered in lessons about hypergamy and such into their children.
On the other hand, wealth can make you go soft and lose the killing edge. Just like the Fremen in Dune(or us here in US).
But that is all mere speculation based on a single-incident.
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“I always imagined such super-billionaire types are full red-pill in private”
You read too much gbfm.
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On the other hand, wealth can make you go soft and lose the killing edge. Just like the Fremen in Dune(or us here in US).
Wealth and time seems to have made them soft. The Rothschilds’ younger generations now have quite a few party animals, suicides, and now, it would seem, instances of adultery and cuckoldry.
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Look at the third picture down, the wedding picture.
They have extremely similar facial features. Eeerily similar.
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Oh, wow. Yeah, they definitely do. The nose, the pursed lips, the similarly shaped eyes… even their eyebrows seem to have the same curvature. Why do you suppose that is?
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They’re probably second cousins or something. Those banking families have been inbreeding with each other for centuries.
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Anna Karenina Redux…
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look at ben’s mannerisms, he’s a closet homo.
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Heartiste, you need to start a new thread on the item james k posted
billionaire beta boy dumped for an alpha ghetto gangster type.
Clearly Zuck did the right thing by marrying asian. Very very few Asian females dump their beta white husbands .
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http://www.bakadesuyo.com/do-men-with-traditional-gender-role-attitudes
http://www.bakadesuyo.com/do-sexist-men-make-better-husbands
http://www.bakadesuyo.com/how-sexy-are-sexist-men
http://www.bakadesuyo.com/do-the-sexually-promiscuous-have-more-sons
http://www.bakadesuyo.com/do-skinny-women-have-more-daughters-do-domina
http://www.bakadesuyo.com/do-beautiful-people-have-more-daughters
http://www.bakadesuyo.com/do-violent-men-have-more-sons
http://www.bakadesuyo.com/do-couples-prefer-sons-over-daughters
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http://www.bakadesuyo.com/10-things-you-need-to-know-about-attraction
http://www.bakadesuyo.com/does-a-womans-attractiveness-level-change-wha
http://www.bakadesuyo.com/what-male-body-language-attracts-women
http://www.bakadesuyo.com/what-gets-a-man-more-one-night-stands
http://www.bakadesuyo.com/do-our-tastes-in-the-opposite-sex-mature-as-w
http://www.bakadesuyo.com/do-the-elderly-pick-mates-differently-than-yo
http://www.bakadesuyo.com/do-women-become-friends-based-on-similar-leve
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thats fucking crazy if a billionaire can’t have someone like that killed the fuck just goes to show money don’t change people i guess they still are under the same constraints of being human but shit man the fuck why if you got money you better make sure you got a killer on speed dial shit
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A wealthy man can still be considered a softy if he’s been given all this money from someone else instead of earning it himself (whether that wealth is given to you by parents, lottery, etc).
It’s those who create businesses from scratch and turns it into a multi-million dollar company that makes a man hardass.
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frankly I am not surprised at all because I heard stories of old billionaires marrying a woman in order to save her from bankruptcy. Some even did 5 times. I call them The White Green knight. They are so beta that even their money can’t help them pull an 18 year old virgin.(remember they come from the 60’s era)
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keep someone from blackwater on retainer fuck
its a travesty these billionaires got no real power although maybe that is what they want us to think
prob why that one dude from facebook moved to Singapore.
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You are an idiot.
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On the topic of flattery, i just wanted to give thanks for this blog.
The truth is posted here. Though biased, its non-filtered real shit. It’s easy to read the kind of things posted here and become jaded/misantrophic. That doesn’t matter. What’s important is that this generation knows what the fuck is going on and faces the reality of the situation. If not for this, so many aimless cowards like myself would’ve ignorantly continued on, not knowing what they were doing wrong.
My life has massively improved since reading this blog. Fuck all the PUA shit, its a bandage solution. Once you intellectually acknowledge the inherit weaknesses of females and Actualize/apply the knowledge, everything game teaches you comes naturally. As it should.
It’s not even about pussy anymore. Realizing how a woman ticks, you sorta lose interest in even bothering. And thats when it clicks. Masculinity enlightenment. The art of truly not giving a fuck and getting so much more than you ever would have if you did.
Healthy misogyny, deep from within. No longer looking to women as equals but as something to be enjoyed and trained. I still feel a shiver of the old Beta going up my spine saying that, disgusted at such a thing. That part of me will gladly die. Embracing nature has been so much more effective.
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They can think they are training me like a dog too. If the doggy treat is good enough, I’ll bark. You can put this on my epitaph. “The poor sap was so easy to manipulate with feminine charms, deference and loyalty.” I am all for ruthlessly exploiting each other with addictive pleasures. I have no use for misogyny. A misogynist is a feminist from my point of view since they hate everything I like about women.
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Praise, apology, and gratitude. “Err on the side of” undersupply.
It’s not just a flattery thing, it’s an integrity thing. The more you overuse any sentiment, the less genuine its expression will mean. If you say goodbye with “I love you,” then if and when that phrase is ever meant to be genuine, it will have lost all its flavor.
Matt
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They’ve carefully hidden attributes of beta males in this article:
http://yahoo.match.com/y/article.aspx?articleid=12986&TrackingID=526103&BannerID=1338498
Look closely – can you find them?
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Five simple words…
“You remind me of me.”
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“Do you know what happens to guys who cravenly praise their girlfriends day in and day out? They get dumped. Or tossed into sexual solitary confinement. Or taken for granted, if they’re lucky.”
This has been far from my experience. You obviously don’t want to completely overdue it but you basically framed it as if you do it more than every once in a while because you want to bang a girl you are doing it wrong… I’ve had many great relationships and I think being honest with your partner as much as possible about how you feel is the best way to go about it.
“1. never complimented their GFs’ looks
2. never complimented their GFs’ smarts
3. never complimented their GFs’ personalities
but who had their GFs wrapped around their fingers. Even funnier, their GFs complimented *them* all the time, and all they answered in return was a head nod or a “you bet”. Isn’t love grand?”
The kind of relationship described here doesn’t appeal to me as a person. I’ve had all sorts of kinds in my life but at least for me that sounds like kind of a crappy way to spend your time with someone. If my GF put up with that or acted in that way I’d get really sick of her really quick. I don’t know why I’d be interested in someone like that?
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I would also recommend using very traditional language in speaking to your wife or other woman about having sex. Don’t say “make love”. Say that you are looking forward to “enjoying her” or “using her”.
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I was once fucking my wife, and for some reason she asked me what I was doing. I told her that I was enjoying a woman. She loved that. God knows why.
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Because … secretly … women love …. to be treated … as the feared OBJECTS … that they are …. omg lozozlozz
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If you are good, you can get the girl to mirror your language and objectify herself. (Women do this all the time to each other. The cold way they assess their assets.) I have had my wife refer to my “finishing her off”, an expression she got from me. That is, shooting inside her.
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Another good one is to get the girl to adopt your opinion of her body and her best assets. I had my wife telling me that her legs were her “best asset”, because I had told her that a few times. Once she starts objectifying herself, using your language, you are making a real impression.
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More than once I have been told they fantasize about kidnap and rape. Its not that they want to end up in several pieces in a garbage can, but they want to be man handled with the implied loss of control. Obviously it has to be someone in particular where the lack thereof is quite a horrible experience.
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“So, in order to raise funds, I put my collection of baseball trading cards on eBay”
Am I the only one that thinks that such a collection is absolutely beta?
anovulatory menstruation
If Monica Lewinsky had been a teenager, I bet Bill CLinton would have created this expression to say that it wasn’t pe.do.ph.i-lia
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If you had them when you were a kid? Either way, nothing compares to selling them for a ring.
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hey bros… i know its off topic but check this blog. written by a woman who seems to be in alignment with this blog. she bashes feminism like a boss
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colombian guy, you forgot to give details of the blog.
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You should always flatter fat girls.
“You know, for a fat girl don’t don’t sweat much” 🙂
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Heartiste,
I get that the target audience of this blog is a male one, but sentences like this:
“Ladies, you really want to strike the gooey center of your man’s heart? Tell him you love how he commands a room. Bam. You’ve just won an extra 30 seconds of lovemaking”
…make my day. Thoroughly enjoy your advice. More please.
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fatkini?
There goes my chubby.
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If you had them when you were a kid? Either way, nothing compares to selling them for a ring
Kids are kids, they will turn into alphas or betas in their teens. I think the stuff was beta, and selling it all for a ring was uber-omeg.a
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I don’t know, its the women who seem to despise their childhoods and spurn and burn their dolls. I don’t really have anything as such myself . I admit I do get a little sentimental thinking about General Tron’s Secret Police Confession Kit.
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[…] Beröm: Beröm inte en kvinna för mycket, det sänker din uppfattade sexualmarknadsvärde. [källa] […]
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What are some good ways to reprimand your girl?
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A short lecture. A sharp, forceful reprimand. Then silence. Whatever you do, don’t bicker with her.
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when/for what reasons should you do this? only when she acts entitled or for little things?
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Not often. Most of the time, just remain calm. A reprimand should be a serious moment. When the woman has really annoyed you. A cool, articulate lecture is good. Or a short burst of controlled anger. No ranting. No bickering. At times, a sharp command, in a really serious moment.
Most women are wired to respond to these. But don’t get into an argument. State your case. Correct anything stupid or wrong she has said. But don’t get bogged down in an argument. It gives her power over you, allows her to bring her female verbal skills, and can escalate dangerously. Say your piece, and move on. Leave the scene if necessary.
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