It seems the domains of vice that were once predominantly the purview of shady men have found purchase among women. A reader writes:
I have encountered a few chicks (very smart ones!) who enjoy using fake identities to make friends with men on the Internet and manipulating the information they provide. (I mean actually lying about themselves, revealing false information rather than simply declining to share true information.) I’ve gotten good at smoking them out and leading them into inconsistencies. They never admit lying even though they’re caught dead to rights, and they often try to turn the tables by claiming to be offended at the lack of trust I show by doubting them, before running out of lame excuses and disappearing in embarrassment.
Sometimes, though, there is a genuine spark, which is unfortunate because even if under other circumstances a real relationship could happen, I won’t tolerate sock puppets and they won’t admit to behaving badly. What’s the best way to get these girls to fess up rather than run away?
(A “partners in crime” attitude is one possibility, getting her to tell about her other fake identities and helping her make them more effective, but although that appeared to work great for me once, it backfired because it made me take longer to realize she had told me a completely different set of lies, so I’d rather encourage truthfulness.)
What advantages do women accrue from crafting false identities over the internet?
1. Fat chicks can enjoy, for a spell, the attentions of high value men by posing as slender babes. Upside: An hour of ASCII attention beats zero hours of real world attention. Downside: There will be no real-life consummation, unless the fattie is psychotically blind to her revolting condition.
2. Thrill-seeking and attention-whoring chicks enjoy an exhilarating rush from the deception. Sometimes a lie is fun for the sake of it. Duping people is a power trip. As anyone who has dated a lot of sexy sirens will tell you, girls LOVE LOVE LOVE to role play. But, unfortunately for them, most men are not very interested in role playing, (real life for the average man offers enough drama as is). So what’s a girl to do? Well, she’ll take the initiative and fire up a game of one-sided role playing. Upside: More fun than talking about the weather. Downside: She’ll tend to attract lunatics who wear dresses made out of skin.
3. Daddy’s Little Abandoned Princesses Syndrome. D-LAPS girls are drawn to the idea of “starting over” with new identities because it is a psychological balm which helps suppress bitter memories of daddy’s unfathomable sayonara (often prompted by mommy’s equally unfathomable surprize divorce paper filings). These girls make a great lay because they use sex to extirpate their suppressed rage; just don’t expect them to always act in their own best interest.
4. Femme Fatales. Ah, the manipulative woman (but I repeat myself). These are the most dangerous breed of female; they lie less to assuage their egos than to separate the swooning man from his money. Or time. Or sanity. You scoff at the notion that any woman would be able to lie you out of your resources, but it happens all the time. To pick one example of the genre, there are plenty of stories of beta males scammed out of thousands of dollars by hot Russians they met online who were probably computer generated algorithms by some hack face deep in a bottle of wuuudka.
Forgot an obvious group!
5. Married women with ovulatory cheatin’ in their hearts, trying to keep it on the down-low. It’s imperative that you identify these women, because you don’t want to deal with the blowback from banging a married woman with an ex-con hubby just released on parole.
If women are embracing the traditional vices of men in greater numbers than ever before, then I take that as evidence that modern Western culture exerts a masculinizing influence on its women, (whether that is genetic, environmental, or both, I leave as an exercise for the reader). When the sexual and psychological polarity of men and women reverses, you can be sure the end of high civilization is near.
So what to do about this blossoming window into the female id? The reader asks:
“What’s the best way to get these girls to fess up rather than run away?”
His suggestion of a “partner in crime” strategy is fine if you want to get to sex quickly with no long-term consideration. Liars are just like trustworthy people in one respect; both want to be with honest people. Letting a woman know you are as much of a liar as her is not the stuff that beeyootiful romances are made of.
Another option, if you’re really interested in brazenly lying women as girlfriend material (and I would have to ask why you would be?) is the non-judgmental rapport building strategy. This is accomplished not by accosting the woman about her lies, but by sympathizing with her motivation for lying.
“You know, I feel you. I get it. It’s exciting to create a new identity and just run with it, and see what it’s like to live like a different person for a little while, to live like someone you secretly wanted to be ever since you were little.”
This empathy ploy will be more effective at coaxing her to open up about her lies, and from there you can dig at the truth. The key is non-judgmentalism and connection; players like to call this an “our world” routine, which draws the woman closer to you by erecting a false antagonism between you and her together against the rest of the world. In the end, though, women who love creating false identities for the purposes of gratifying themselves at the expense of trusting beta males are best left alone, hopefully never to breed so that their kind can be expeditiously cleansed from the gene pool. Luckily, condoms allow you to get your fuck on with them *and* clear your conscience of any anxiety that you may have sired a bastard sociopath in the act. Just don’t let her throw them away for you. Keep your eyes on the used rubber, and see the disposal process through from start to finish. (Not kidding about this last part. I could tell you stories.)