Making people wait
Show up late. The King does not wait patiently for guests to arrive. The King arrives for meet and greets when guests are assembled in breathless awe. Principle applies equally to throne rooms and bar rooms. Arrivals, replies to questions, decisions to consensus building exercises, request fulfillments — all should be delayed to the point of provoking discomfort in others, but not beyond. People naturally assume the higher status of those who don’t jump when asked.
Not laughing at jokes
The King is not amused. And he is hard to amuse. The King does not suffer unfunny boobs gladly. The King does not care about fortifying social cohesion with insincerity, so he will stare at you expressionless if your joke bombs. He will not fake laugh to make you feel at ease. He will not laugh uproariously if you are a hot girl making a lame joke. You will feel uncomfortable, and this is why you will try harder to impress the King. The King knows this. He luxuriates in your appeasement.
Staring past people
You talk to the King? Impudent plebe! The King hears you, but his attention is elsewhere. Past you. Over you. Through you. Your entreaties are puffery to the King, because he has heard it all before. Your cleverness is dulled. Your insight is clouded. Your conversation is trite. And yet, somehow, despite all evidence to the contrary, the King answers you as if he had been listening intently the whole time. You feel relieved. You like this feeling, so you set about to win the King’s approval again. And again. And again.
Cutting people off
You talk and talk. The King has a thought of his own. It could be a grand thought, or a trivial musing. It doesn’t matter, because it is the King’s thought, and that means the King will cut you off mid-sentence to regale the masses with his wit and wisdom. His voice commands, his self-confidence refuses impugning, his happy entitlement woos crowds. Even you, cast aside and set adrift, find strange succor in the King’s heady leadership.
Disappointing people
The King has so many matters he must tend to. People need and want the King. His presence — nay, his blessing! — is requested at board meetings, parties, events and bedrooms. The King’s plate is full. It is always full. And this fact makes the King smug, even resentful. The King likes to disappoint people. Or, more precisely, he cares not for pleasing people. He knows scarcity is part of the appeal of his brand of authority. His subjects will wait on him, and he will sometimes not show up. And those subjects will be sad. So sad, in fact, that the next time the King *does* show up, their joy will be overflowing.
***
You may think these are dickish moves. You would be right! But the alpha cuts his teeth on dickishness. There is no alpha male who is not, at times, dickish. It comes with the territory. And since dickishness is a territorial aspect of alpha maleness, those who mimic it are presumed alpha themselves. And that, my budding alphas, is how you win pussy and influence people.
Alpha Male Power Moves will be a continuing series. Lord knows the incredible shrinking American Beta Male needs the lessons.
Heartise for King!
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He’s giving advice for asserting control over weak people with low self-esteem. Consider your response in light of that.
[CH: Keep telling yourself that. It amuses the King.]
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Hypothetically, what happens if you want to meet up with another “alpha” (scare quotes because I find the whole dichotomy off-putting) or somebody you actually respect? Is it a competition to see who shows up latest? Is this how you behave with your friends? A man says what he means, he doesn’t make commitments on which he can’t follow through and he certainly doesn’t go out of his way to disappoint people in order to fill some kind of expectation of what high-value is supposed to look like.
In Europe or other places where people aren’t socially retarded people spend time together in order to forge sincere connections, not to joust in a power play. Hierarchical relationships are real and important but living your life like an actor in hopes of giving an appearance of value to strangers is empty and pure decadence, even if in materialistic terms you’re getting everything you desire.
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we gotta live one!
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Nuke it from orbit. Only way to be sure.
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“In Europe or other places where people aren’t socially retarded people spend time together in order to forge sincere connections, not to joust in a power play.”
Welcome to America. Why do you think The Game even exists? Americans are obsessed with “power” (a better word is control). Men use Game to prevent women from controlling them, and the only way to do that is to be a selfish, controlling person yourself. And in order to survive socially you have to be an awful person. It’s just the way it is for a lot of people over here. For some people, anyway — the “red states” are better in my personal experience.
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this is a tricky one. I think the best way is to look at men who have top notch wives e.g. Orlando Bloom seems like a girl, but has a healthy marriage to Miranda Kerr, a woman most men would try to hit on. Tom Brady and Gisele. Ben Affleck and Jennifer Garner etc. There’s gotta be something more in these cases than just “he’s famous” because both husband and wife are on equal footing in terms of social value
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Yep. Women started it, we beat them at it, they end up on their knees. Quit moving your head so much, you’re spilling my beer!
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@ ArtyB – If you’d really been to Europe, you’d know that power play and game are practiced here, too.
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yep. not to mention europeans have a much much longer history of it.
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The point of that line was that the USA is the epicenter of social decay. It’s everywhere, just here more.
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Exactly. Ever been to Sweden? Same dynamics, just a bit different on the surface.
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Cutting people off
You talk and talk. The King has a thought of his own. It could be a grand thought, or a trivial musing. It doesn’t matter, because it is the King’s thought, and that means the King will cut you off mid-sentence to regale the masses with his wit and wisdom.
You try pulling that shit on me and you’ll be lucky if I don’t pick up a chair and crack open your God-damned skull with it.
I’m sitting here getting furious just reading an anonymous internet blogger writing about that ploy in the abstract.
[CH: It’s funny, but as much as internet tough guys say they would smash a dude pulling this maneuver, in real life it rarely goes down like that. Instead, in real life, the alpha male gets away with it. More than gets away with it… people love him for it.]
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If anyone could enlighten me…and so I could become better at recognizing the difference between ‘alpha’ and ‘beta,’ is this alpha behavior? (Scene from Harry Met Sally)
To me it comes across as non-reactive and self-amusing. Plus, it seems like he’s just pulling her into his own reality.
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I’m sorry I tried to watch but I can’t listen to Billy Crystal.
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hey heartisteetstztz!!!!
check out how putin does not laugh is not amueeusuedzz!!! lzozozozz
zlzozzojoiwhlwlzlzkzowjizlzozo
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This clown is yet again exaggerating and being highly inaccurate, and he knows who to peddle his misinformation to. His customers, like the GBFM dude.
FYI, Obama is not surrounded by Zionist Jews. Those Jews surrounding Obama have no interest in Zionism, aren’t Zionists, and Obama is no Jew lover. There is black heritage month, so why not Jewish heritage month? Eventually, such a gesture to the Jews was bound to happen. For Obama, this gesture is a clever camouflage of his true feelings – his hatred of Israel, as well as other western nations for being successful “on the backs” of the 3rd world, according to him. Obama is no Jew lover, Israel lover, Zionist lover, White lover, or West lover, and he lumps all Jews and Israel with the rest of the west, which he feels he needs to punish for “colonialism.”. He’s going to make lots of trouble for Israel real soon and this gesture is only a disguise of his true intention.
Use your head. If he were really influenced by Zionists, he never would have appointed the likes of both John Carry and Chuck Hagel. Actions speak louder than words. Learn to navigate through pretty speeches and half-ass gestures, instead of listening to false prophets like this dude.
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Hahaha. Well, it just seems like there are several examples of ‘game’ in the movie:
Harry: When we first met I really didn’t like you that much
Sally: I didn’t like you
Harry: Yeah you did, you were just so uptight then…you’re much softer now.
Sally: (momentarily frazzled) You know, I hate that kind of remark, it sounds like a compliment but really it’s an insult.
Harry: (Shrugs, smirks) Okay, you’re still as hard as nails.
—
I mean, that even reads like a pickup routine: ‘when I first met you you seemed like x, but now I realize you’re y.’ He brings it up when she’s getting comfortable and enjoying their rapport, breaking it.
It’s just interesting to me, because the character is pretty much…at first glance…not what anyone thinks of when they think ‘alpha.’
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Such a great movie. Irritating, know-it-all alpha game 🙂 Ah, the tension.
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I looked at your pic and i will rate you an upper 4. I guess you are approaching forty now (the wrinkles!) and might have been a solid 5 when you were younger.This would also explain why you hang out here with us, because you don’t have many suitors in the real world fighting for your time. You certainly get a plus or putting up a photo. What was your SMV results?
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What happened man? Why didn’t she respond?
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Kate a 4???
She is not even wearing make up and she is quite attractive.
she is also slender, has a very nice figure
the pic of her face is a bit blurry, where do you see wrinkles?
if she is near 40 she looks quite good for a woman that “old”
She is much more than a 4.
According to hotornot I am an 8.6 ( male, 53 years old ) and if I was not hundreds of miles away I would want to meet her.
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Oh, was I supposed to respond? I’ve been napping. The elderly need their rest 😉
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^^^lol^^^
points for the kick-return
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Another fifty-something? Hurray!!! Who knows? We might only be a short swim away 😉
Not that is matters much, but I’m 34, I do have wrinkles, and I am wearing make up in that picture. I don’t wear clown make up. I use Invisible Fluid Makeup by Estee Lauder. I grew up on the beach, so my battle is with sun damage. Three cheers for microdermabrasion!
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And you are nuts, or just an entitled fool.
Kate is very attractive, witty, and very funny for a woman.
I am starting to smell troll for some reason.
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@Kate,
I’m going to give you some superbly useful and profoundly metrosexual advice to make your skin and hair as fine as they can be, and reverse any damage:
inside:
1. Take 2 tablespoons of Udo’s Oil 3-6-9 Blend every day with your largest meal. You can mix it in juice
2. Source Naturals MSM powder: 1 teaspoon a day
3. Synthovial Seven Liquid Hyaluronic Acid 1ml daily
outside:
1. go to uniquelyemu dot com and buy 4oz of their Clear Emu Oil
2. Fruit of the Earth 100% pure Aloe Vera gel
3. CeraVe Moisturizing cream in 16 tub
Mix these together in your hands and coat your face with it a few times a day on a damp face.
Finally, wash your face as *infrequently* as possible and *never* with hot water. Hot water destroys your skin.
Buy the supplements at iherb dot com and the aloe and CeraVe at amazon.
Skin game from a ~40 year old man who is often mistaken for late 20’s and whose metrosexual routines have served him well and keep him within plausible poking distance of each year’s crop of legal high school seniors.–
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It might be the testicles 😉
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Kate,
if people say you are not wearing make up, then let them believe that.
You remind me of myself; you are too honest for your own good
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Not white knighting but you need glasses dude.
Alas, Kate is a little too young for me.
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When were you born? The Stone Age? 😉
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I believe dirt was young when I was born. 🙂
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That’s funny, because she is definitely far too old for me.
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And there we have it! Conclusive evidence that “old” is relative. In other news, the earth is round and pot finds its lid:)
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@n/a: Thank you! And I hope you enjoying fine weather. *sips tea very properly*
@CF: To be anything other than honest would be…dishonest! 🙂
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Don’t flatter yourself, you are still old.
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I haven’t watched the original movie, but this clip is very interesting because it summarizes the lessons learned here. Her no-sex “men friends” she refers to after the conversation heats up at 1:10 are really beta orbiters. She is hot enough to know that her beta-orbiter “men friends” surround her because they hope to get only one thing from her: Sex. By calling her on that and refusing to be her “friend,” the guy stands up to her and makes it clear that he is not going to play her game.
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lol no, you wouldn’t.
You would go “wh– I– uhh–” and realize everyone is listening to the king and not paying any attention to you whatsoever, making you suddenly feel insignificant while instinctually understanding that if you threw a temper tantrum everyone in your group, and everyone around you, would defend the king as if you were threatening to punch out santa claus, and they’d all tell you to chill out and the girls in your group would call you a bully and not suck your dick because you showed how insecure you are to them by reacting with so much anger…so you would just bite your lip and hold back and, when the king acknowledges you and allows you to join his conversation, you’d get sucked into his frame just like everyone else around him.
That’s just how the dynamics work. I use this to AMOG guys all the time. But enjoy your rage-boner, I am certain you are super tough and scary in real life lol
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The question is, what do you do when the other dude then cuts you off? And/or what is a good response when somebody does try to AMOG you this way?
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ACT.
Speaking is for women.
And if you’re about to act and realize it isn’t worth it, you may ask yourself “Why do I want anything to do with these cunts?” and say fuck it and split.
And you may ask yourself
Well, HOW DID I GET HERE??
LETTING THE DAYS GO BY, let the water hold me down
LETTING THE DAYS GO BY, water flowing underground
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This becomes an “AMOG battle”. It can get pretty ridiculous but it’s fun to me lol
Basically the key is in getting the other person to react more to you than you are to them. Alpha natural type guys subconsciously understand this so a battle with them can be pretty fun and teach you a lot.
It’s funny because its not an aggressive thing like people imagine. It’s all in the sub communications. In fact often when you end up going back and forth with a guy you end up respecting eachother and become buddies.
Here’s some old school knowledge on it cause I gotta go shower last night’s chick off my dick before the cooties set in lol:
http://www.rsdnation.com/node/60063
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“In fact often when you end up going back and forth with a guy you end up respecting eachother and become buddies.”
True. I can think of at least two of my best mates where the friendship started this way. Cool mofos usually end up digging other cool mofos for the same reason women do…they’re entertaining and real.
Also, all this talk about chairs over heads and punches in jaws = LOL. The King already runs the show. One time at a club a dude who was considerably bigger than me once got in my face after he was trying to punk my easy going skinny friend for no reason and I intervened. I stood there smiling at him ready to throw down, and all the sudden 4 bouncers bum-rushed this clown out the door so quick he was gone before I figured out what happened. Why? Because the bouncers know me, like me, and that was the end of that guy. Resorting to violence means you ran out of cool adult moves. You will look like an over-reactive, over-emotional roid ape.
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“Cool mofos usually end up digging other cool mofos for the same reason women do…they’re entertaining and real.”
If you define real as “memorizing dozens of alpha tactics and always worrying if you’re alpha enough”.
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@AW
“Why? Because the bouncers know me, like me, and that was the end of that guy. Resorting to violence means you ran out of cool adult moves. You will look like an over-reactive, over-emotional roid ape.”
Yup. Even if the bouncers don’t KNOW you, when you’re socially savvy you can befriend them in the moment that everything’s going down and they can just sense that the other guy is the one over-reacting and causing problems.
The “chair over the head” “decorate the groud with your guts” guys are living in an action-movie fantasy.
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As a former (Voxian) Omega/Gamma (and now low Delta), this is exactly the truth. I was like that, complete with threats of violence!
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‘You try pulling that shit on me and you’ll be lucky if I don’t pick up a chair and crack open your God-damned skull with it.’
I interrupt people a lot these days. This never happens.
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It never happens because most people are afraid of the consequences, afraid to hurt another person, afraid of crossing that line, hitting someone because you WANT to hit a person, not because he or she really did something that warrants it.
However, responding with a swift punch to the jaw is absolutely an acceptable response to this behavior, in the world of men.
Only in woman world do you behave like a passive aggressive cunt.
Fear is real power. Violence is real power. It’s how a lowlife Hispanic druglord gets a sexy beauty queen roped into his world.
When in the company of “friends”, knock out the next douche who behaves like a douchebag cunt. Then when the rest of the men present complain, challenge them.
They’ll all back down and the cunt will know who not to fuck with.
If you bitch about it and cry and get pissed off before hand, then you’re acting like a beta bitch.
Women emote. Men act.
Speak with intention. Act with intention. And never assume you can mock someone openly.
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beta cannon fodder moves.
I watch you fight each other at a club for “king of the best-case-5’s” and laugh like a Democrat (retardedly)
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I accept pay pal.
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My social life continues to improve. On Monday, this one girl I know found some neon sunglasses. She gave them to me and said that she saw them and thought of me. Everyone I know thinks the glasses are ugly/ridiculous or whatever. However, -I- think they’re awesome.
So the next day, I just wear a bright shirt that matches the glasses. Usually I see Jennifer6.5 around and shoot the breeze with her and her orbiters. One of her orbiters is a guy with tons of presence combined with terrible social calibration, but he’s a good-looking guy. In other words, a nightmare to deal with because he always wants to be the center of attention, never has anything cool/fun to say, and has a natural pull with girls (although his personality sinks him a high% of the time…). As example, I’m wearing the glasses, and Jennifer6.5 says that they ‘fit’ me. CaptainAMOG is quick to say ‘ya, he’s definitely peacocking.’
Jennifer plays back with me now with the roleplaying…minor shit like ‘how is this relationship ever gonna work if you/me blah blah blah?’ CaptainAMOG attempts to break convo “I like the new Scray, from apathetic nobody to overconfident douchebag.” Jennifer6.5 smirks “…what do you mean, new?” CaptainAMOG is sure to laugh (he has a really loud, overbearing laugh). I take a breath, lean back, and then ask another guy in the group ‘you think those girls with the tight t-shirts are still giving out the free hotdogs by the quad?’ Everyone laughs at this. Jennifer6.5 shakes her head.
I get to class late, still wearing these sunglasses. Cute7 is in this class. Cute7 is a girl who I was fairly sure seemed kinda neutral/not so into me. She did minorly play back with the roleplaying stuff early on, but it just fizzled over time. Closed body language whenever I said anything, short responses, etc. Yet, today, I’m like…fuck it, I’ll just sit right next to her. So, I walk in, and she looks at me…I just give her a big smile with the sunglasses, and she sort of rolls her eyes, smiles, and looks away — it’s a good look. I sit down, and she’s sure to compliment me on the glasses. I dunno, from this moment Cute7 and my dynamic completely changed. Not a lot of touching (I’m still a big pussy with this kind of stuff), but idk…other people have already independently said things like ‘it seems like Cute7 is into you.’ She has a boyfriend…but I keep trying to think of ways to just isolate her.
CaptainAMOG/Jennifer6.5 interactions are probably going to teach me a lot. I’ve started noticing a pattern…J6.5 loves to just randomly drop bombs on me. But, she drops these bombs on me after I do something positive. Two Samples: I pump up the group’s state, CaptainAMOG falls into it ‘yeah, guys let’s all do something, let’s all just hang out.’
Me: Yeah, but well…only if we drink. What’s the drink count?
J6.5: (shakes her head)
Me: I need a 3/4 majority to accept this offer. Has she ever even raged?
Orbiter1 (steps behind J6.5 and vigorously nods his head behind J6.5, lets out overtly supplicating laugh): Hyuck, yuk yuk, I just wanted to make sure she didn’t see me, she’d probably hit me.
Orbiter2: I’ll drink.
Me: And CaptainAmog will drink, I’m sure. Just look at him. Born to rage.
(CaptainAMOG, given the spotlight, revels, flexes, and laughs…along with the rest of the group, and then suddenly)
J6.5: No he won’t.
Me: Oh why not, Stalin?
J6.5: Cause I’ll make him not, and he’s more likely to do what I tell him to do than to do what you tell him to do.
(?!?!?!?! Jesus christ, wttttttffff….the rest of the group immediately laughs at what she says. Somehow I manage to hold the line and just sit there. That’s right, through the laughing, through the statement, and I just rockback on my heels. The group goes silent, and I don’t say anything. I just sit there. Everyone’s looking at me. Finally)
Me: What?
CaptainAMOG: (going for kill) Aren’t you going to say anything?
Me: Do you need me to sanction this…?
CaptainAMOG: Yes, I demand that you speak!
Me: (puts hand on mouth, as if thinking)
Me: blah blah blah (pumping positive vibes into the group…I forget what I said, but I must have said something about liking the White Stripes or whatever).
J6.5: And you wonder why I could never love you back.
(BOOM…again, and it gets instant laughs from each guy. In my mind I’m like ‘there’s no way that’s actually funny…either they’re uncomfortable, or they’re just tossing out all the validation they can)
Me: I’m sooo into unrequited love.
J6.5: In that case I’m madly in love with you.
Me: Aaaaaah….gotcha….yuuuup…..
J6.5: No, I was just…
Me: Noooope….I gotcha…..you fucked up. You fucked up big time. Secret’s out. (puts on sunglasses)
J6.5: Nope. No secret.
(Guys in background are confused in their response….and I think I’m starting to understand why. Everything they do is keyed in to how she reacts. -Everything-)
Nightly’s birthday was this week. So this weekend’s cold approaches were while I was obliterated. Nothing much to learn here. HOWEVER, in all of my normal interactions I have noticed that the above ‘problems’/lessons whatever, are very relevant. I think Ya is probably right….that, going into this with a huge handicap, I’m just going to get a ton of shit thrown at me. Especially now that I’m getting more invites, hanging with cooler people, blah blah blah.
So was J6.5 shit testing me, tooling me? Really an academic question at the moment. The usefulness is just in the fact that she obviously enjoys controlling frames. She also clearly expects my frame to be weak. CaptainAMOG presents the same sort of learning potential. I mean, now that I’m interacting with a lot more people…this pattern is there. I really think that I’m on the verge of a huge breakthrough….
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Your instincts are right, there’s a lot of learning to come out of this interaction here.
I’m heading out the door but I’ll blab about it in-depth later.
Quick homework notes:
– who has the strongest frame in that interaction? Does captainAMOG fall into her frame? So who REALLY has the highest value? And, knowing who’s value is the highest, who do you get the most overall attraction for not reacting/qualifying/supplicating to? 🙂
– how legitimately funny is what the girl says? Why does everyone laugh except you? Is it because you didn’t get her jokes or because of a social dynamic? And how does this concept of “high value + strong frame = unfunny jokes become funny” translate into pickup/seduction in general? Why does the high school cheerleader laugh at everything the quarterback says when it isn’t even funny, and why does an unconfident comedian telling an objectively funny joke bomb?
– which comments by CaptainAMOG and which shit-tests by the chick legitimately affected your frame or value? And which responses by you to these things legitimately affected your value, up or down?
– what impressions of you would you say each person left that interaction with? In terms of your frame, your confidence, your value, what place in the value hierarchy you came across as in the group, etc.?
Think on this stuff and I’ll be back with a thorough breakdown of what all went on there.
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It’s weird. I don’t want to mislead anyone. Like, most of the change in my life has been self-directed. I would still say that I have to initiate most interactions or whatever. And, as time goes on, I just feel myself growing less attached to people. There’s this ‘I don’t need them,’ emotion. People are just starting to lose their particular importance to me.
Unfortunately, I’m just worried that I’ll end up spiraling away from any and everyone…and if I don’t keep just going around, re-initiating interactions or whatever, they will stop.
‘ So who REALLY has the highest value?’
She does? Dudes become such idiotic cunts in the face of a chick. That’s what I’m really noticing. I mean, I’m not mad about it…but it’s just like watching monkeys in a cage.
‘ how legitimately funny is what the girl says’
99% of anything any girl says really isn’t funny. Now, this is a huge red pill for me — because guys laugh at like 99% of anything a girl says. I guess I’m just in that awkward transition between butthurt ‘wtf that isn’t funny,’ to ‘lolwtf…this is hilarious, that you guys think this is hilarious.’
‘ And which responses by you to these things legitimately affected your value, up or down?’
Fuck man, to be totally honest, I feel like I bombed on each one of them. Like, in my mind…when you do something that increases your value, the group should instantly shift a bit. And I didn’t really feel that at any time. And if I didn’t feel that at any time —- why am I still hanging around? Phuuuuck, maybe just being there was a DLV.
‘ In terms of your frame, your confidence, your value, what place in the value hierarchy you came across as in the group, etc.?’
There’s just no way it could have been that high. It’s hard to remain non-reactive when someone says something and there’s an instant chorus of ‘HAHAHAHAHAHAOMG!’ I feel like outright ignoring it is incorrect. Laughing at it — when it isn’t funny to you — is bullshit and validates them. What’s the third way, beyond just coming up with something cool to say?
Maybe agree and amplify is the best thing in all situations. I guess I’m just worried it won’t work to increase value.
Like:
X: You’re stupid.
Y: Ya the dumbest ever, I can’t even tie my shoes.
X: Ya that’s what I said, pretty retarded, glad you agree
Y: Mmmmhm.
I mean…I guess my mindset is wrong? Like ‘oh if they aren’t validating what I’m doing I must not be high-value.’ I dunno.
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“Everyone I know thinks the glasses are ugly/ridiculous or whatever. However, -I- think they’re awesome.”
That’s all that matters:
Of course once you start wearing them “to get a reaction”, their magic will stop working for you. Same as any routine etc. where you start coming from a frame of “look at this, don’t you approve of this? Love me for this!! Give me your validation!!” lol
“a nightmare to deal with because he always wants to be the center of attention, never has anything cool/fun to say, and has a natural pull with girls (although his personality sinks him a high% of the time…).”
lol these guys are annoying. They’re like kids playing with grenades…they’re only going to do damage. They’re not even going to help THEMSELVES out, they’re just going to blow everything out of the water for everyone.
Like I can respect a guy who steals a girl from me, touche’, way to go buddy, good game…but a guy who’s just tossing grenades around and clearly isn’t going to get anywhere himself it’s like “duuude go away” lol
“Jennifer6.5 says that they ‘fit’ me. CaptainAMOG is quick to say ‘ya, he’s definitely peacocking.’”
She sets the frame. He agrees with her frame. You’ll see this pattern a lot lol If she had said they were dumb, he’d have said “ya, you should take those off bro.”
Also note the subtle leadership grab, he does this a lot too…he takes what she said, and then authoritatively re-states it as if it was his observation/idea instead of hers. You’ll notice he does this a lot too, this is really common with Natural alpha types.
“Jennifer plays back with me now with the roleplaying…”
IOI. Would she roleplay with a stinky homeless man? No.
“CaptainAMOG attempts to break convo “I like the new Scray, from apathetic nobody to overconfident douchebag.””
lol. This is a good AMOG on his part. He expects you to qualify yourself to him with something like “What? No I’m not a douchebag, why do you think that??” This is really subtle, but as soon as you start qualifying yourself to him and letting his burns get to you, he’ll just go “wow relax man I was just jokin why are you so sensitive lol” and your value is just shot and you feel frustrated.
“Jennifer6.5 smirks “…what do you mean, new?””
This is another situ where, like the girl in the cafeteria(?) a few FRs ago (same girl?), she KNOWS the “crowd” will back her up. So when she wants to try to break your frame, she’ll rally up her troops of sad pathetic “yes men” that follow her around and because they all want to fuck her they’ll jump in to support anything she says and pile the social pressure on you just like that cafeteria chick asking the guys across the table about love and the waitress etc. to try to get you to crack.
“CaptainAMOG is sure to laugh (he has a really loud, overbearing laugh).”
lol they always do, hey.
“I take a breath, lean back, and then ask another guy in the group ‘you think those girls with the tight t-shirts are still giving out the free hotdogs by the quad?’”
Solid way to handle it. Basically like he didn’t say anything and doesn’t exist and his insult didn’t even register on your radar. When I’m in a set where a guy is trying to AMOG me and I’m purposely trying to get the girl, the guy is completely invisible and silent to me. He can be yapping LOUDER than I’m talking, but I just talk through it with my eyes locked on the girl and the guy just doesn’t exist and, if the girl is attracted, he doesn’t exist to her either. This is pretty trippy to see in action lol
“Everyone laughs at this. Jennifer6.5 shakes her head.”
This is good. She’s just shaking her head because she’s STILL expecting you to cave to her frame. Keep passing these tests and eventually she’ll shoot you more and more IOIs.
This probably doesn’t feel like a “victory” to you, but it is. Think of it like this, a “victory” is just “not a loss”. So in a shit-testing AMOG situation like this, sure you CAN win with the crowd cheering and the chick going “wow Scray lemme suck your dick!!”, but a win is also simply “not lowering your value”, where there’s no fanfare or anything crazy…it’s just a lack of “uhh Scray, that’s lame :P” and diminishing value/attraction.
So a neutral “finish” is a win, not a loss. This is something you’ll start to learn. The reason it’s a win is because from a neutral situation, you can build your value and get a legit winning finish. You can’t do that from a low-value situation. So an interaction that ends on a “neutral” note is simply “unfinished business”. You’ve already seen bits of this in action, where a girl who was relatively not into you good or bad, as your reputation gets around and all that, suddenly comes up to you to say hi with a big hug and you’re like “wait wtf? I didn’t know she even cared that I existed, where’d this come from?”. Well, you were in a neutral state with her, and were able to bring it up into a win.
So think of it as “unfinished business”. Down the road as you demonstrate more value, shit will fall into place with those people…as long as you keep your value, which you did by not qualifying yourself to the AMOG or to the chick.
“Cute7 is a girl who I was fairly sure seemed kinda neutral/not so into me.”
lol see, this is exactly what I mean. Neutral is okay, it means you can turn it around. When she sees you as low-value (imagine the housewife who’s super-beta husband is no longer attractive to her because she views him as pathetic and beta), that’s when you’re fucked (thus one-itis guys not being able to get out of the friend zone easily).
“She did minorly play back with the roleplaying stuff early on, but it just fizzled over time.”
Roleplaying back with you at all was an IOI. To you, this probably says “she lost interest”. To me, this says “I *KNOW* there’s a spark of attraction in her that I can fan up into a forest fire, because we were THERE once, and I didn’t do anything to sabotage that, the flame has just settled back down into a little spark again…all I have to do is stoke that fire and we’ll be right back where we were before, and I can stoke that fire with confidence because I KNOW it’s possible for her to be attracted to me since she played along with my roleplaying before.”
When you have a girlfriend, even if she’s in an off mood or you haven’t seen her in a few weeks, you don’t question whether you can grab her and kiss her hello. Of course you can, you KNOW that she’s attracted to you even if in that moment she seems neutral or the spark has settled down. You have reference experience of that, so you don’t hesitate.
“Closed body language whenever I said anything, short responses, etc.”
Doesn’t matter. She might just be shy/awkward. Or if she has a boyfriend, she might be reigning herself in extra hard because she knows she’s attracted to you and that that could be a slippery slope, which is more likely.
Basically the point I’m getting at is that if you’re digging around in your backyard, and you discover plutonium, THAT happened. If your friend says “I dunno man, usually they only find that in the desert.” you go “Dude, I fucking FOUND it.” and if they go “I dunno I was in your backyard recently and I didn’t see any.”, you’re holding plutonium going “THIS. Right HERE. This happened!!” And if he’s all “Dunno man, there’s a lot of trees in your backyard now and I can’t really see the spot where you say you found it…”, you go “It’s in my hand, right now, right here, I found this shit, I don’t care what trees are there now or what you saw, I witnessed this shit and you not believing in it or changing circumstances don’t remove the fact that it was there, in my backyard.”
So when you get IOIs, you don’t just write those off, even if circumstances change. Even if she HATES you now, you can still probably swing a hate-fuck out of it lol Because you know the attraction spark was there. If you were a homeless man, it wouldn’t be there. If you were super low-value, it wouldn’t be there…but your value is going up day to day, so an IOI from months ago is still relevant today even if you haven’t gotten one from that same girl since then.
“fuck it, I’ll just sit right next to her.”
It’s only weird to her if it’s weird to you. Even if it’s weird to her at first, as long as your frame of “nah, it’s fine” is strong, she’ll cave to it and it’ll be fine.
“smiles, and looks away — it’s a good look.”
IOI.
“I sit down, and she’s sure to compliment me on the glasses.”
IOI.
“I dunno, from this moment Cute7 and my dynamic completely changed.”
What changed is you made her react to you by sitting by her and peacocking.
“Not a lot of touching (I’m still a big pussy with this kind of stuff)”
That’s fine, I do a lot of my seduction verbally. I’m not big into the physically aggressive style, though I do it now and then just to have it in my toolbox. During the daytime, or a chill time of night with girls in my social circle, etc., I’ll just stick to verbal stuff. Roleplay, innuendo, qualifying, etc. I’ll just make sure to touch them later on when we have some isolation. Too much touching in the middle of a bright classroom will trigger her ASD, esp if she has a boyfriend.
“other people have already independently said things like ‘it seems like Cute7 is into you.’”
More IOIs, blatant enough for “normal people” to pick up on them. Soon as you change your mentality from “nahh, she probably isn’t into me, that probably didn’t mean anything” to “of COURSE she’s into me, of COURSE that was an IOI”, you’ll open a floodgate of attraction.
“She has a boyfriend…but I keep trying to think of ways to just isolate her.”
You could probably escalate on her if you can isolate her. But it’ll have to be full isolation, AND you’ll have to demonstrate that you won’t judge her for cheating on her boyfriend. The RSD guys say stuff like “it’s fine, it’s just kissing” and “you’ll never see me again, it’s fine” etc. to help the girl rationalize “I won’t get caught doing this and no one will judge me”.
Remember, I’m not going by “how hard would it be to escalate” or “what’s her mood like today”. I’m going purely by the logic of “she’s given X amount of IOIs, and that consistently means that if you do Y action, you are very likely to get Z result”. It’s not 100%, because we’re talking about human beings here and there’s a million ways you could fuck it up along the way…but to me this is all a green light.
“CaptainAMOG/Jennifer6.5 interactions are probably going to teach me a lot.”
Yep. A lot of newbies cry that it’s “hard” and people “tool” them and they don’t want to get “shit-tested” and wahhhh why can’t it be easier. Fuck that mindset, all of this stuff teaches you the skillset and forces you to solidify your frame and shoves your sticking/weak points in your face so you have to address and fix them.
Paraphrasing from Tyler’s old audio seminar: “What do you think the first thing I do is, when I see a guy with hot girls at the club? I go over and try to take his girls. So I can see how he tools me, and I can LEARN from it, and I can learn to handle social pressure.”
“I’ve started noticing a pattern…J6.5 loves to just randomly drop bombs on me.”
Main way of shaking your frame. A lot of guys will cave really easily in general so girls don’t have to drop more than a tiny grenade on them. But some girls, to re-enforce how “wrapped around their finger” they have the world, will drop massive bombs and watch the chaos of guys scrambling and stuttering. This isn’t a malicious thing…sub-consciously she’s looking for the guy who she can’t phase, because THAT’S the guy that’s going to be worth her time in the long-run. That’s a guy who can take on the world and protect her from it.
In a way it’s sad, a hot girl spends most of her time disappointed by the people around her because they all cave to her and she knows all she’s done to deserve it is have a vagina. She’ll still get off on the validation high from it, but it’s an empty frustrating high in the long-run.
With bomb-droppers I like to, instead of responding to their bomb, cold-read them with a locked-eyes staredown and an “I bet most men find you intimidating.”, like, she knows exactly what I’m talking about. She’ll usually drop a cocky “Of course, guys are pussies” type line and I’ll just seague into rapport with an “Ya, I’ve noticed that. It must be frustrating…no girl wants a guy who’s so wishy-washy he just agrees with everything she says.” and just start taking her into weird emotional territory that she wasn’t expecting to go to, and do it with an authoritative “I understand your world completely” tone lol
Another way to handle it is after the intimidating line, just escalate the energy if she’s one of those types, where you can be like “Ya, you act like a bitch and guys run off crying with their tail between their legs…but you’re in trouble now, ’cause I eat chicks like you for breakfast. ;)” or like “Ya, that’s how I know you and I wouldn’t get along. We’d fight all the fucking time. But we’re so hot, the makeup sex would be fucking amazing. Well, on my end. You’re the starfish type, I can tell.” etc. etc.
Different ways you can take it depending on the energy/vibe of the situation. The key is to ignore the frame she’s trying to set (reacting to the bomb she drops) and just plow through it with your own frame and force her to react to you instead of the other way around. You want to be the metaphorical train steamrolling toward her with a confident unshakable grin while she’s caught off guard backtracking and trying to get her footing.
“But, she drops these bombs on me after I do something positive.”
Then they’re IOIs. Cleverly disguised IOIs in the form of shit-tests, but they’re not negative even if logically the words she’s saying are negative. You do something positive, so she’s attracted, but she doesn’t want to be attracted to a loser so she has to test you to see if her attraction is justified or if you’ll snuff it out.
Usually these girls lead to really passionate sex because the interaction is so “Fuck you, I wouldn’t bang you if you paid me.” (step closer) “Oh ya, well I’d pay you just to fucking go AWAY!” (step closer) “Good, then I wouldn’t have to look at your ugly face!” (step closer) “Good, I fucking hate you!” (aaaaand makeout followed by crazy-sex lol)
For what it’s worth I LOVE these types of girls. The harder they shit-test me, the more into the interaction I am because I love that chemistry.
I get bored as fuck with the shy quiet nice girls.
“I pump up the group’s state, CaptainAMOG falls into it ‘yeah, guys let’s all do something, let’s all just hang out.’”
This is him taking credit for someone else’s idea again lol
”
Orbiter1 (steps behind J6.5 and vigorously nods his head behind J6.5, lets out overtly supplicating laugh): Hyuck, yuk yuk, I just wanted to make sure she didn’t see me, she’d probably hit me.”
So gay. lol.
One of my favorite perspectives is from Tyler where he says “Some people say learning to pick up girls is creepy…no, you know what’s creepy? NOT learning to pick up girls. Because even if you DON’T learn how to do it…YOU’RE STILL GONNA FUCKING TRY. You’re just going to be BAD at it, and be even MORE creepy because you suck.”
“Me: And CaptainAmog will drink, I’m sure. Just look at him. Born to rage.”
Solid. This isn’t an insult, but this is you basically giving him your approval. AMOG’ing doesn’t have to be negative/confrontational. It’s fine to give other guys the spotlight, as long as it’s on your terms like here.
“(CaptainAMOG, given the spotlight, revels, flexes, and laughs…along with the rest of the group, and then suddenly)”
Congrats. CaptainAMOG fell into your frame for a second there. 🙂 He doesn’t know he did, and you might not have even realized he did…but *SHE* knows he did. Thus she has to re-claim her high-value in the group since, right now, your value is higher than even CaptainAMOGs…you’re now competing for #1 with her. And so:
“J6.5: No he won’t.”
This is her flexing her “I know the guys around me will do whatever I say” muscle again.
“Me: Oh why not, Stalin?”
Good. Challenge her.
“J6.5: Cause I’ll make him not, and he’s more likely to do what I tell him to do than to do what you tell him to do.”
lol. I bet she even said this with a serious expression and locked eye-contact VS a playful grin. Now she’s pulling back the curtain. This is a good thing. It means that 1) she knows she can even TELL these guys that they’re her lackeys and they’ll nod their heads vigourously and say “yes ma’am!!” with a smile, like that’s how much power she knows she wields…and 2) she’s qualifying herself and her power to you. This is like an animal showing it’s teeth…”don’t you know you’re supposed to be afraid of me?? wtf!!”
Also this chick would be a fucking hot bang. I knew this one chick who I referred to in my head as a cobra, because she would drop bombs like this and then she’d lock eye contact to see if I flinch and I swear her head/neck would sway slightly like a cobra watching it’s prey and looking for it’s moment to strike. Chemistry with that one was through the roof lol
“the rest of the group immediately laughs at what she says.”
They don’t even get that she’s tooling them lol
On a side note, I would respond to this with something either self-depreciating like “shit, I should’ve worn my push-up bra today” or the reverse, something overly-confident like “don’t be so sure, my tits look fantastic in a push-up bra.” Either one would keep my value because they’re not logically qualifying myself to her…they’re just making fun of the frame she’s trying to set.
“The group goes silent, and I don’t say anything. I just sit there. Everyone’s looking at me. Finally”
Solid. You’re good at this “go silent and chill” thing when you don’t know how to respond. That’s always a good default to fall back on if you don’t have something witty jumping out at you. It builds up the suspense and makes everyone in the group focus on you dying to see how you handle yourself…whereas if you tried to just shit out a lame half-assed response you’d lower your value and feel like a loser.
“CaptainAMOG: (going for kill) Aren’t you going to say anything?”
lol, of course. Like hyenas/jackals jumping in. Also he’s setting a hoop for you to jump through. Now if you “say anything”, you’re doing what he told you to do and supplicating to him.
“Me: Do you need me to sanction this…?”
Good. You’ll answer on your own terms, and you’re ignoring his hoop…and technically setting up your own minor hoop of “admit that you need me to do this and then maybe I’ll do it for you.”
“CaptainAMOG: Yes, I demand that you speak!”
lol this is him trying to take charge again. He could’ve said like “Ya man, what do you got??” but instead he turns it into a command so again he’s setting the “do what I say” hoop for you to jump through.
“Me: (puts hand on mouth, as if thinking)”
And again by not responding immediately, you’re ignoring his hoop.
None of this is like, necessarily RAISING your value like to the applause of the crowd or anything…but like I said before, the important thing is that you’re not LOWERING your value…you’re keeping it where it is, and that’s a good thing. That’s a win in these situations.
“J6.5: And you wonder why I could never love you back.”
Again she’s just flirting and shit-testing you. She wouldn’t do any of this with a homeless man. This is all “dipping your pigtails in the inkwell” kindergarten flirting.
To this I would respond either self-depreciating like “I just assumed it was my small penis and all the disappointing sex” with a grin (something offensive enough that she has to react to it) or overly confident like “you don’t have to hide your love for me by being so mean. Just go with your feelings Jennifer, accept your love for me and open up your heart!” (again something where she’ll have to react to it).
“and it gets instant laughs from each guy. In my mind I’m like ‘there’s no way that’s actually funny…either they’re uncomfortable, or they’re just tossing out all the validation they can”
It’s the latter one. Because they allllllll think if they validate her enough, she’ll fuck them. Because they’re stupid. lol
This is exactly the same as the reversed-gender version where the high-school football jock goes “Nice *HAT*, Bro…lolololol” and you’re like “wtf? that’s not even funny” but all the cheerleaders are laughing their asses off and touching him and he walks off with them and you’re like “WTF!!!”
“Me: I’m sooo into unrequited love.”
Not a bad response, you’re agreeing & amplifying here.
“J6.5: In that case I’m madly in love with you.”
She’s still flirting. This is just another shit-test. That’s this girl’s thing, that’s what she does. You can actually extrapolate a lot of personality traits from how much she shit-tests. Like the Cute7 from before probably wouldn’t shit-test you this much. This is just her blueprint of how she works and how she sizes up the men in her world.
I would handle this the same way you did…it’s like anything negative doesn’t exist to you, and anything positive, even if it was sarcasm, is OBVIOUSLY true, in your world lol
“Me: Aaaaaah….gotcha….yuuuup…..”
This causes her to react to you:
“J6.5: No, I was just…”
And now you cut her off (remember, someone’s going to smash a chair over your head and decorate your guts for daring to cut someone off!!!!!! lol):
“Me: Noooope….I gotcha…..you fucked up. You fucked up big time. Secret’s out. (puts on sunglasses)”
Solid, this is just totally staying in your own frame. Very well handled.
“J6.5: Nope. No secret.”
See now this is like way back in one of your first FRs, where I told you that when a girl can’t shake your frame, her “comebacks” and “insults” will actually get pretty lame/weak. That’s where she’ll resort to “you’re short.” and stuff. It’s like, she doesn’t know what to do here, so all she can do is what amounts to basically “nuh-UHHH!!!!”
It’s a good sign. Think of it like you guys were just boxing and she realizes she can’t get a punch in so she’s just weakly flailing her arms at you exhausted. This is where I would start pushing forward on her and moving in for the kill, because I know she’s lost her footing.
So this is where I would usually start coming back over the top with “It’s fine, now that you’ve finally admitted your love for me nothing can stand between us. You won’t have to stalk me anymore, gazing at my magnificence from a distance, wishing for just one chance to touch me, to hold me, to make sweet sweet love to me.” If the environment is right for it, I’d grab her by the hips and stare her down and pull her in as I jokingly rambled all this stuff, and then abruptly back off and cut all the sexual tension away.
Robbie Williams does this at 2:30 in this clip:
He builds the tension up, up, up, he’s the train, she’s stumbling backward trying to get her footing aaaaaahhhhh– and then he just pulls away and acts casual. He does it again later in the video.
Or if I’m not feeling like escalating physically is the way to go, I might just end it verbally with a final “But your heart will have to long for me till next time, because I have to go now…(start walking away) try not to passionately dream about me all day, I know it will be difficult! (as I’m too far away for her to respond without shouting)” where I’m basically just obnoxiously shitting all over the frame she tried to set.
Basically it’s that train plowing forward steamrolling through her frame, forcing her to stumble backwards trying to get her footing, and going for that knockout punch and leaving before she can get herself together and get back into “bitchy shit-testing mode”. Once she regains her composure, she’ll go right back into bitch mode…but when you get to the point where her tests/insults/etc. are weak, that’s when you hold the upper hand.
“Guys in background are confused in their response…”
lol get used to this. The guys ALWAYS want to take the girl’s side, but what’ll happen when you get good is that you and the girl start sub-communicating most of your conversation. So on the surface, which is what those guys are listening to, she’s telling you she hates you and “you’re too short, you WISH I’d fuck you” and you’re saying “fuck you I should punch you in the cooter”, and those guys are like “wow okay we hate him then!”…but the whole time you’re doing that surface-level thing, you’re both looking at eachother with that look like “god we’re both turned on right now…” So the white knights are about to step in and kick your ass but then suddenly you start making out with her and they’re like “HUH??? what just happened???” because they have NO idea what was going on.
Here’s a good demo of this “sub-communication VS outward expression” thing in action in My Best Friend’s Girl:
I have a LOT of these interactions, because I love these kinds of girls and the things I Say are so offensive/confrontational that they instigate these kinds of responses from girls.
The funniest part in these situations is where the guys will jump in and fuck it up, but the girl will KNOW she’s attracted to you and KNOW that YOU know she’s attracted to you and that you’re roleplaying, but she knows he’s going to fuck everything up because he’s inept and she’s going to lose out on a guy she was into.
Good Will Hunting has a good scene of this happening, specifically at 1:47…the girls are teasing him and he’s joking around but they all KNOW he’s just joking around and stuff…then in comes the lame-ass White Knight to fuck up the vibe. So at 1:21 she says “History” with him, because she’s trying to say “hey, fuck off you douche, me and this guy are flirting here…” At 1:47, she’s frustrated because this socially inept retard is fucking up what was a fun interaction:
“Everything they do is keyed in to how she reacts. -Everything-”
Yup. Notice that she doesn’t shit-test THEM the way she shit-tests YOU. Why is that? Because she already knows she has them and that they’ll cave, it’s no fun, there’s no challenge, and she sees them as pathetic already. But YOU…she KNOWS (or so she thinks) that she can crack you, sooner or later, you’re going to cave and fall in line kissing her ass and qualifying yourself and becoming one of her yes-men just like all the other guys.
Except that you won’t. And then she’ll be frustrated at how much her vagina tingles when you’re blowing off all her tests. And then you fuck her. 🙂
“going into this with a huge handicap, I’m just going to get a ton of shit thrown at me. Especially now that I’m getting more invites, hanging with cooler people, blah blah blah.”
Yup. It’s fine though, look at it as a challenge and as something that’s going to make your game tighter. Tyler talks about how you’re only as smart as you NEED to be. A super hot girl with fake tits? She doesn’t NEED to be smart to succeed in life or to get men attracted. A 5’9″ balding pale ginger with a nasally voice? That guy has to be REAL fucking smart and have tight game to get girls. It’s not a bad thing at all.
“So was J6.5 shit testing me, tooling me?”
She doesn’t necessarily want to full out fuck you yet, but you’re an on-going project for her. She will never ever ever EVER admit she WANTS to fuck you, part of her blueprint is that she needs to pretend she doesn’t want to fuck you, especially around other people, even if she really sub-consciously knows she does. So try to get her to a party of some sort and then instigate her to throw you some more of her shit-tests at the party so you can pass them (building attraction), and then isolate her at the party, and you can probably escalate (if it were me this is where I’d use my stuff about “You intimidate most men, don’t you.” stepping toward her while I’m staring her down in a kitchen of a house-party where we’re isolated from everyone and she’s a little turned on, sexual tension through the roof, etc.) and fuck her with a similar style to Dane Cook in that video I linked above.
Like, that’s how I’d run it if I was in your situation and got all the signals from her that you’ve gotten. That’s how my mind interprets all the stuff she’s done so far, filtered through pickup knowledge/experience, this is all a green-light to me if the circumstances are right.
“The usefulness is just in the fact that she obviously enjoys controlling frames.”
It’s good that you can even SEE this. Her yes-men lackeys have no idea any of this is going on or that they’re actually undermining themselves, their value, and her attraction for them, by falling into her frame all the time.
“She also clearly expects my frame to be weak.”
Yup. This is probably partly due to your previous reputation and all that baggage shit. If you had JUST met her for the first time ever today, she probably wouldn’t shit-test you as much because who you portray yourself as would be congruent…but she’s trying to figure out if you’re still “Scray, the apathetic nobody” under this new exterior.
So she has to shit-test you over and over until she can finally feel comfortable being attracted to you because she’s thoroughly convinced that “okay, he’s who he’s portraying himself as, he’s NOT that apathetic nobody that I would be embarrassed to be attracted to”. This kind of thing is why it’s hard for guys with one-itis who’ve been beta/supplicating to their dream girl for years, have trouble turning it around. The girl shit-tests them and they fall apart and she KNOWS they’re still the same unattractive “little brother” they’ve been for years.
It’s a lot easier to just meet new cold-approach girls who have no idea who you are except for how you appear to be from the moment you meet them. But these situations aren’t something you can escape from, being in school and all, and they’ll toughen up your frame and force you to learn to be solid, so that’s not a bad thing. It’ll pay off in your cold-approaching down the road.
“CaptainAMOG presents the same sort of learning potential.”
Yup. You’ll find as you meet more people and get further into game and understanding all these little dynamics, that you can sum people up VERY quickly. When you can do that, the Naturals and the rich guys and the good looking guys and all that shit start to lose their mystic untouchability they seemed to have before…you see all their flaws and understand that while they have strengths, they also have weaknesses, and you’ll learn to maneuver around their strengths and target their weaknesses if you need to compete with them, but also learn to use their strengths to your advantage and make them feel better about their weaknesses when you want to befriend them.
“I mean, now that I’m interacting with a lot more people…this pattern is there.”
One of the things that blew all our minds when pickup was first being pieced together was how many consistent patterns there are when you spend a lot of time in-field. Human beings really start to seem like just extremely complicated (but logically predictable) AI programs.
“I really think that I’m on the verge of a huge breakthrough….”
You’re doing great man. 🙂 Keep it up. Like I say, at this point in your development there are SO MANY new things to take in in SO many different categories (AMOGs, frame control, shit-testing, group dynamics, kino, etc. etc.) that it can be overwhelming or feel like you aren’t making much forward progress toward actually sticking your P in a V. But like I said way back at the start, right now you’re building a solid foundation and framework in your understanding of social dynamics and how you handle yourself and your interactions…down the road you’ll build off this foundation and that’s where you’ll start getting laid and open up a whole new chapter of game.
Some guys might read your Field Reports here and be like “wow yareally is just bullshitting him, I knew game doesn’t really work, Scray’s been going out for like two months and hasn’t gotten laid yet, this stuff is all lies and brainwashing!!”, but you’re the only one who can say for sure whether your social life and the potential you can see in yourself is improving or not, in categories besides “how many notches have I added to my belt this month?”. 🙂
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I replied with a bigass analysis to your FR, but it has like 3 YouTube links in it so it’ll probably take a day to get through moderation lol
“I would still say that I have to initiate most interactions or whatever.”
That’s alright, it’s going to be a while before people knock down your door begging for a chance to hang out with you. Taking initiative is fine. The tall good-looking guys at the bar who stand in a corner all night waiting for girls to approach them get approached by 4-6s. The manager isn’t popping out of the woodwork to cold-approach them and say hi. The smokin hotties aren’t lining up to suck their dick.
Once you’ve demonstrated consistent high-value for a long time in a social circle, they’ll start calling on you. But don’t wait for that to happen. If you’re getting introduced to new people and invited to parties and stuff, you’re just fine.
“I just feel myself growing less attached to people.”
This is outcome independence starting to form, as well as internal validation. ie – you’re starting to not look to other people to determine your worth for you. You know you’re a cool guy, and you’re just going around riffing off whatever’s on your mind, and if they like you, cool, if not, who cares. Down the road this will be a good thing but there’s a period where you’ll start to see people as having no value whatsoever and when you can see all the little seemingly petty social dynamics going on you might even be disgusted and turned-off by everyone for being trapped in such shitty mindsets and behaviors.
Down the road you’ll come out the other side and start meeting people who legitimately have value to you and who’s opinion of you actually matters for more reasons than “we go to school together so of course I should care whether they think I’m cool or not”. Like you’ll have learned what’s important to you and what attributes you consider high-value…for me I discovered that I actually highly value positive optimistic people, and it was shocking to realize how many people around me were actually negative and pessimistic all my life and I had no idea.
In a way you kind of start to realize that a lot of the people you held in high regard when you were oblivious to all this, really weren’t THAT great and, often, were actually pretty flawed. This can be kind of a sad/disillusioning stage of the game, but out in the field, every now and then, you’ll meet legitimately high-quality people and you’ll be able to recognize it and appreciate it.
When I was an AFC, I’d say that I felt like I needed 80%+ of the people around me, to feel good about myself, to feel complete, to feel like my needs were taken care of, to validate my existence, to pour my efforts and feelings and energy into them, etc. Now it’s like…5%. lol I have a lot of friends and acquaintances and misc random assosciates and stuff…but there are like, 3 or 4 people total who I would actually really, truly be internally devestated if I let down or if they saw me as a low-value person. Everyone else? They can come along for the ride or they can go fuck themselves and miss out. It’s no skin off my back. 🙂
“I’m just worried that I’ll end up spiraling away from any and everyone…and if I don’t keep just going around, re-initiating interactions or whatever, they will stop.”
This is why you cold-approach and make new friends, who see you as high-value from Day 1. 🙂 Make friends with some guys on Death Row at the bar and introduce them to some random girls (ie – offer them value), and those guys will happily be txting you “hey man, you partying this weekend?” hoping to hang with you. Social circle, especially one you already have a reputation as an “apathetic nobody” in, is completely an up-hill battle, in terms of establishing and keeping your value.
One day you’re gonna’ graduate from wherever you are, and you’ll probably move away to somewhere where you don’t know anyone and you’ll be forced to establish a social circle from nothing…and that social circle will only know you as “Scray, that fucking cool guy who’s got his shit together and has this unexplainable charisma with chicks”.
This is alllll just a practice-run for that day. 🙂
(and back at home CaptainAMOG will get Jennifer pregnant and they’ll both get fat and spend their nights on a couch watching DVDs and eating pizza delivery lol)
“Dudes become such idiotic cunts in the face of a chick. That’s what I’m really noticing. I mean, I’m not mad about it…but it’s just like watching monkeys in a cage.”
Yup. 🙂 She has the highest value and she knows it, and when you get CaptainAMOG qualifying to you and refuse to jump through his hoops and enter his frame etc., she knows that means you’re the other highest value person in the group. So she tests you to see if you’ll become another monkey in the cage (and imagine, if YOU’RE just a monkey, then what does that make CaptainAMOG, who beta’ed himself to YOU? He looks even WORSE than he already does lol), or if you legitimately deserve that high value place.
“I guess I’m just in that awkward transition between butthurt ‘wtf that isn’t funny,’ to ‘lolwtf…this is hilarious, that you guys think this is hilarious.’”
lol there’s a lot of that in this. You go through those stages of like, disbelief (“seriously?? are they really doing this??”), depression (“wow, I can’t believe this is a thing that happens…this is pathetic…”), anger (“quit being so fucking pathetic you guys!! god!! don’t you have any self-respect?!?”), acceptance (“sigh…I guess that’s just how they are…”), and down the road eventually you get to non-judgement/appreciation (“lol, you guys are at it again hey, fuck that’s funny…but hey, you just keep doin’ your thing y’all, I’ll be over here tearing it down :)”).
There is absolutely a huge element of becoming disillusioned with the people around you and even the people close to you and with humanity in general, in fully swallowing the Red Pill. But you can get through it, by meeting enough good solid people over the years…thus the importance of cold-approach.
“I feel like I bombed on each one of them. Like, in my mind…when you do something that increases your value, the group should instantly shift a bit. And I didn’t really feel that at any time.”
This is the big sticking point for you, and what I tried to explain in my analysis up above. If there’s 3 outcomes: a positive result, a neutral result, and a negative result…don’t lump neutral and negative together, it’s actually the other way around…positive and neutral are both a win. Only negative is a loss. Neutral means it’s just “unfinished business” that you can build on in the future.
If you want to extrapolate this, a lot of guys panic when they meet a 10. Because a 10 won’t give them the same blatant approval that a 6 will give them. So when they say something funny to a 6, she’s all “OMG LOLOLOL” and touching them and practically sucking their dick. So they think “okay, a girl has to react like that for me to know what I did has attracted her.”
But then they meet a 10 and they do the same thing to her as they did to the 6, and the 10 is just as attracted as the 6, BUT she’s USED to hanging around cool guys so it’s not as big a deal to her as it is to the 6 who thinks she just won the lottery…so her response is toned down way more and, often, not even noticable. Her approval is in her not walking away or leaving the set or outwardly rejecting you…like it’s an implicit “I’m here, so of course I’m attracted” thing.
One of the RSD guys (can’t remember now) likens it to you finding a $10,000 bill on the street. That’d be the greatest day of your LIFE, you’d be skipping and hopping down the street with joy. But if Bill Gates finds it, ya, it’s cool to him, I mean, that’s $10,000 out of nowhere, but he HAS a lot of money, he’s SEEN $10,000 bills, he’s still happy about it like you are, but he’s not externally doing back-flips down the street about it because he’s used to it.
So remember: the only loss is a value shift DOWNWARD…neutral or upward are both wins and green-lights. This is part of why it’s important to become internally validated, so you’re not stuck looking for those external indicators of whether you should be thinking “of course they all love me, I’m awesome, look at my badass shades”.
“There’s just no way it could have been that high.”
In HER mind it’s supposed to be:
1) Her
2,3,4,5) Everyone else
To CaptainAMOG it’s supposed to be:
1) Her
2) CaptainAMOG
3,4) Orbiters
5) You
But by not jumping through CaptainAMOG’s hoops or falling into her frame it became:
1) You
2) Her
3) CaptainAMOG
4&5) Orbiters
So she shit-tests you because she’s trying to get her #1 spot back. And CaptainAMOG tools you because he’s trying to get his #1 spot back.
If you cave to her frame, it ends up like:
1) Her
2, 3, 4) Everyone else
500) You. Because you sank down 490+ spots for being a phoney which she sniffed out by getting you to cave, which is even worse than just being a lame-ass Orbiter where she knows from the start that you’re worthless lol
But if you don’t cave to her frame, you leave the interaction like:
1) You
2) Her (frustrated and determined to knock you out of #1, but if she can’t do it and finally accepts that, she’ll be attracted and want to fuck you)
3) CaptainAMOG (frustrated because you aren’t subordinate to him like you’re supposed to, so he’ll keep trying to knock you out of #1…he doesn’t realize there’s no scenario where the chick sees him as high enough value for her btw lol)
4) Orbiters
So there’s a breakdown of the value-shifting lol It can go up and down at any time from minor little things. Notice when it’s all laid out like this, how just “not losing value” is a win. Even if you don’t gain massive value and have everyone cheering your name, as long as you don’t drop down to #3 like CaptainAMOG did, you’re actually doing good and can consider that a win and “unfinished business” for the future.
“I feel like outright ignoring it is incorrect.”
It’s a good default response if you don’t have anything better handy. I’m pretty quick-witted and I’ve been in so many social interactions that I’m pretty rarely phased by anything people say to me or any shit-tests I get…but when you’re starting out it can be tricky. Silence keeps your value neutral, but a shitty response can drop it, so silence is better than just stumbling something out.
Why? Because stumbling something out is reacting to them. Silence is you taking control of the interaction and implying “I’ll respond when I choose to.”
“Laughing at it — when it isn’t funny to you — is bullshit and validates them.”
100% true.
“What’s the third way, beyond just coming up with something cool to say? Maybe agree and amplify is the best thing in all situations.”
Basically take it to the two extremes: Self-depreciate in such an exaggerated way that you’re obviously joking (if you just self-depreciate a little bit, it can come off as believable and like you just have low self-esteem lol “Well I’m kind of short… :(” could be something you actually think but “Well my dick is only half an inch big, it looks like a wet baby carrot… :(” is clearly fucking around)…or you can be overly confident and agree-amplify like “ya my cock is huge, I can’t even get my pants on in the morning some days, no one understands how hard it is to be me!”
“I guess I’m just worried it won’t work to increase value.”
Your response to an insult/shit-test/AMOG doesn’t have to INCREASE your value, it just has to not DECREASE it. We have PLENTY of other tools in our PUA toolbox for increasing our value. 🙂 Think of it like if someone punches you, your defense doesn’t have to knock them out…you can just absorb the blow a bit in a controlled manner as long as it doesn’t hit anything vital or knock you down, because you have jabs and hooks and uppercuts that you can bust out to knock them out. In PUA terms that’s stuff like peacocking, social proof, DHV stories, etc. etc.
“I guess my mindset is wrong? Like ‘oh if they aren’t validating what I’m doing I must not be high-value.’”
Yup. It’s wrong. But 1) pretty much everyone in the world is stuck in that mindset…when you look around and can see how prevalent this is in society it’ll make you sad. Truly confident people are actually really rare, most of society has a facade on and behind it they’re secretly terrified of judgement and other people not approving of them…even the 8+ chick at the club. And 2) we’ll fix it. 😉
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That’s because “ZombieShane” would do nothing of the sort. It’s the internet, talk is cheap.
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I am the same way, I find myself interrupting people often. Not part of alpha game….I think it’s just poor impulse control on my part. lol I have something to say so I say it. Nobody ever calls me on it. I’m a big guy so maybe that’s why I don’t get called on it, but I’m not known as a trouble maker.
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Turn it up a notch:
‘You try pulling that shit on me and you’ll be lucky if I don’t pick up a chair and crack o-’
I interrupt people a lot these days. This never happens.
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I used to work for a company where everyone was too alpha, in their own minds at least. Since we were also quick learners, we ended up interrupting and shouting in each other faces — because louder dominates — for ridiculous lengths of time.
Phone conferences were even better.
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[CH: It’s funny, but as much as internet tough guys say they would smash a dude pulling this maneuver, in real life it rarely goes down like that. Instead, in real life, the alpha male gets away with it. More than gets away with it… people love him for it.]
I believe it depends on the environment in which these tactics are being used. They would only work in a faggot office environment or in your social life where you’re just kicking back, or THINK you’re kicking back, not realizing that’s where all the women are doing their real work, not noticing the jerkoffs trying to control the situation and getting all the stupid pussy in the room.
I guess since I work in construction where everyone is a bit hot headed and testosterone fueled already, no one hesitates to tell the other guy to shut the fuck up. The only person who would do any of this with impunity is the foreman and only to an extent because he knows everyone’s tired, pissed off and ready to murder someone by lunchtime.
You’ll find many construction workers are extremely polite at work for these reasons.
It’s a different world. One is the physical and the other is the mental. Office workers, all non labor intensive workers, exist in the bullshit rhetoric illusion of the mental world. It’s nonsense and they’re living a lie most of the time and that’s really the only place these power moves would work without you getting pummeled.
If you do it in your family’s house your dad is going to rain fire down upon you, if you still have one, or your mother will nag you to death, etc.
No one’s an Alpha all the time. If you try to be, prepare to be pummeled or written off by people you formerly were close to.
There’s Alpha, the true leader, and then there’s the Jerkoff who’s tolerated because no one gives a shit enough. Let’s not be too broad with the terminology here.
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I party with construction guys, rednecks, MMA fighters (some of them are a combo of all 3), etc. Guys way tougher and manlier and physical than me.
You are an idiot and insecure and the more you talk big the more you would choke in real life. Because the reason you talk big is that you’re scared of being judged as a pussy even on an Internet forum by people you don’t know, and that fear of other people’s judgement of you is exactly the psyche mechanism that will stop you from taking a swing. Except in that case it’ll be the fear of everyone thinking you’re a raging douchebag because everyone ELSE loves the king except you so they all side with him…it’s a very frustrating powerless position for you to be in which is why it pisses you off to even think about it in your head…and that’s why it works as an AMOG tactic.
This is kind of a complex tool, you won’t be able to understand it in your keyboard rage because you’re too emotionally invested and reactive to objectively sit back and piece together what I’m saying lol but no one reacts the way you picture yourself reacting in your head.
There’s a reason no one has actually taken a swing at me in like 8 years of pickup. That’s not luck or I’d buy lottery tickets lol. Handling guys like you is a skillset a person can consciously learn. (I’m not doing it right now because I don’t give a shit lol)
I’m not trying to be a dick (well maybe lol), I’m just explaining how this shit works out in the real world. Also a lot of guys are retarded and uncalibrated and DO get their asses kicked but that comes down to logic, common sense, and experience. You can always pinpoint where it went haywire and the guy tripped himself up and deserved to get punched. That’s why we recommend befriending guys instead of viewing them as obstacles/enemies.
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I think what you’re also getting at is that in the real world, it’s better to take the swing (and the possible beating at the end) than to be an all-talk-mangina.
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yea don’t make threats they are dumb just do what you got to do in the situation
last two dudes though i wanted to kind of fight had weapons though
knife and hammer
so i kind of was waiting for them to make the first move
other time being like 9 dudes again waiting for them to make a move
another time 3 dudes i had a knife
but yea nobody really crossed the line
so yea i didn’t have to go into survival mode
other than massive club fight and nobody touched me i just picked up some marshmellows off each other
really in my life the only ones with the balls to fight me 1 on 1 was back in catholic school lol
allthough last weekend i think dude was talkin shit at club and walked away so i walked up to him and his two friends and was like what
he was like i’m just stupid dude tried to give me a fist bump so how could i be mad he he he
people don’t cross the line with me it just doesn’t happen
got to say i wanted the dude to talk shit so i could get in a fight last week so i could feel like a man or some shit no dice
i don’t start shit either so there is that
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If you care about your status in a group, it’s best to declare yourself immediately and act immediately. Never give an inch. If the leader of your group is behaving in a careless manner, insulting people, then beat him. He’s doing so in order to gain even more of the upper hand and abusing his power, and it’s best if you don’t stand for it.
If he’s worthy of admiration, then he wouldn’t do those things
[CH: And there will be pie in the sky by and by.]
and there is no need to hurt him.
If you don’t care about your status in your group, you wouldn’t be in the group at all, or would already be the cool outlier picking off one or more of the women and that would be your only interaction with it. That’s the Sigma, as Vox Day describes it in his much more detailed and accurate descriptions of the socio-sexual ranks.
If you’re going to do something, do it all the way and don’t half ass it. The “King” is giving it his all despite his outward appearance so if you desire to take his place, then destroy him. If you can’t do so verbally, it’s best not to if you’re angry because you’ll just be another whiney baby, then do it physically, and swiftly, so he flinches in your presence, losing face in front of the women. You think the skinny guy who knocked out Suge Knight doesn’t get respect wherever he goes by people who know who he is and what he did?
If you want to be in the group, you’ve most likely already lost and there’s very little hope for you. You can shake hands and become buddies all you want but some part of you has died for letting it go and calling it the past
If you’re not outwardly interesting, no one will feel compelled to be around you. If you have to go out of your way to present something to them, you’re a chump and your life will unmemorable and if you’re desperate for them to feel this way toward you, good luck. If you behave in the manner described in the OP, you’re a cunt and deserve what ever bad thing happens to you, and the people doing that know this which is why no one I’ve ever known who behaves that way does so to someone with a reputation for hurting people. How Alpha are you when you’re too much of a pussy to publicly insult someone for fear of a violent reaction?
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I agree. In fact I have a broken hand and loose tooth from Saturday night. Best to just hit without threatening.
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@realmatt
Sorry man, you live in a fantasy-land. Won’t waste my time trying to explain the subtle nuances of social dynamics to you anymore. You keep insecurely punching people out for daring to speak while you’re talking, I’m sure you’re a blast to hang out with lol
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I have met people like you Matt who have no self control in situations. You are the type that don’t need access to firearms.
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church
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I think you are so right, and not only that, this stuff has been around for a while and puas are just relearning it. It is hard for people to see from reading on a screen how this would play out in real life.
The dickishness is thoroughly leavened with charm, enthusiasm, humor. It often flies right under the radar and the betas don’t know what is going on.
Example: Look at this clip from a movie where Cary Grant meets his ex wife’s new boyfriend. Granted, he had a script to work from, but the principles are all there. He is very boyish and playful too, responsive and able to improvise to fit the situation:
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Compare the posts of “realmatt” and gunslinger on these matters.
“Realmatt” doesn’t scare me much; but gunny I won’t be fucking with.–
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‘If you’re not outwardly interesting, no one will feel compelled to be around you. If you have to go out of your way to present something to them, you’re a chump and your life will unmemorable and if you’re desperate for them to feel this way toward you, good luck. If you behave in the manner described in the OP, you’re a cunt and deserve what ever bad thing happens to you, and the people doing that know this which is why no one I’ve ever known who behaves that way does so to someone with a reputation for hurting people. ‘
Lol, define ‘outwardly interesting.’ This is how I read this: I must be superficially interesting. Now, if I try to convey my interesting qualities to a group, I’m a chump. If I try to gain status by using the ‘alpha behaviors,’ I’m a cunt. So pretty much, unless people immediately notice that I rule, I should fuck off and die.
What if the guy AMOGing you is bigger/stronger/would probably beat you in a physical confrontation? Please explain how you would handle this.
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Silly Scray, don’t you know that no one is bigger/stronger or could possibly beat realmatt in a physical confrontation? He’s too much of a badass in his own mind lol
Fuck learning how to be socially smooth and create good energy and diffuse negative/hostile situations with words…let’s all just punch eachother’s lights out until the biggest badass is left standing!!
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lzolzozozlzl
check out putin PUTIN folling heartaieytesz rulesz!!! PUTIN IS NOT AMUESED!!!!!
lzozozozlzlo
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MOAR!
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This blog is pure gold. No, platinum.
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‘And yet, somehow, despite all evidence to the contrary, the King answers you as if he had been listening intently the whole time. You feel relieved. You like this feeling, so you set about to win the King’s approval again. And again. And again.’
That’s exactly how I feel when talking to CH. He ignores me for a month or two and my heart is aching really badly and then he replys again to my comment and I forgive him everything in a second.
[CH: Speaking of… my one second attention reward is overdue, so….. hi, there!]
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‘His subjects will wait on him, and he will sometimes not show up. And those subjects will be sad. So sad, in fact, that the next time the King *does* show up, their joy will be overflowing.’
Exactly! How do you know so well how I feel?
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I love you CH, whoever you are!
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your pic looks like a rocket ship penis
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What an embarassment…it’s time to drop the sockpuppet, CH.
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Are you really a virgin? You should try and bed the author of this blog. Srsly. Go lose weight or do whatever you have to do to be pretty. Most of us in the world never get the opportunity to lose our virginity to the one we admired from afar for years on end. Sadly I never had the chance to make love to prince Eric of Disney’s The Little Mermaid or Pierce Brosnon of Remington Steele. Most (all) of the guys on this board never got the chick that looked like Aria Giovanni that they dreamed of in their formative years. But you actually have some level of interaction with the one you idealize. That’s why you should go for it. Do it for all of us losers that couldn’t save our virginity for the one we dreamed of.
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ugly
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shrugs. If you say so. Yet somehow I can’t say I’ve lived the life of an ugly girl.
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Ohmygourd……. You have changed our entire life philosophy fistingx………..
Oops, nevermind, wrong bitch. XD
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you have lived the life of mr potato head with a face like that
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I took a new picture just now. Better?
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feminists are god damn ugly.. nothing to see here
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Nice body. Show more.
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yea can’t even hate. Your body is nice Fem.
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Agreed. Better than the face pic.
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THE Fem-X?
Your T level could almost be measured from your comments. I surmise you’re one of those high-T women who always smells a bit sweaty. Never smells like a girl.
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I surmise you’re one of those low-T men who always smells a bit rancid. Never smells like a man.
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I’m joking Arronski, but you really shouldn’t say or write comments like this. If a girl’s T is too high or too low, this is usually not her fault.
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‘You should try and bed the author of this blog.’
Do you think there is only one author? Because “he” said a few times that there are several writers here. I don’t want to lose my virginity in a gang bang.
[CH: This is the funniest thing you’ve ever written.]
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“[CH: Speaking of… my one second attention reward is overdue, so….. hi, there!]”
Hi, CH! How are you doing? 🙂
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Hmmm….understandable. It might work on some women but it is also instruction on how to be a seemingly, self centered asshole.
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Women are attracted to self-centered assholes (even if they don’t like that fact) and men are intimidated by them. There’s worse ways to go through life.
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but it is also instruction on how to be a seemingly, self centered asshole.
—————————————————————–
or a nigger.
Everything listed are things we all hate about black people.
Matter of fact, Obama got elected by doing the exact opposite of all those things.
White people are getting it twisted.
(((shakin my head)))
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Is this advice applicable in the office? I’d use it on my subordinates, but it would cause disharmony a,ingest my peers.
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I wouldn’t think so. These are for how you treat females you want to fuck, not men at the office who you should treat with dignity(even if, like most people, they don’t deserve it) At the office as in life other men love to tear you down. They don’t want to be friends with the “king.”
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You can’t treat colleagues this way unless you are making a blatant power play to become their superior. Underlings though? Sure. If you couple this sort of stuff with affirmation for good work it works great. Watch Don Draper’s behavior at the office in Mad Men for an example.
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Sorry. There was a study here a short while ago that said that disagreeable men do better at the workplace than agreeable ones.
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It depends on the productivity of the person and the vibe of the firm/office, If it is a big law/financial firm where the only goal is making profit, then yes, self centred a$$holeish men who produce great results fair better and even more liked/respected in a hate to love you way. If it is one of those smaller places though….ymmv.
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The problem with this in the office is that depending on the shop, you keep the dicks in Sales; and you can only afford 1 narcissist per department.
Anything that needs creativity, invention, or watchmaker-like mastery of detail usually gets handled by the smart guys. And insecure assholes narcotizing themselves with the public-masturbation of gamesmanship does not magically transmogrify them into Linus Torvalds. It just ruins productivity and team-spirit.
And depending on the boss, can be a pretty quick ticket to getting fired. Especially if the boss is smarter than all of you; or if you decide to AMOG his pal/nephew.
Live by the sword, die by the sword.
-Or: Useful-idiots will believe The Emperor has new clothes only until he AMOGs a serial-killer.
As William Ury might say, “The ‘Alpha’s’ Best Alternative To Negotiated Agreement is ego and near-zero need for external validation, the other guy’s BATNA is, ‘Why so serious?’ ”
The King is Dead! Long Live The King!
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Maybe so with men, but when dealing with women in the workplace, game is not only handy, but essential.
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Yes. These behaviors will help in the office if used at the appropriate moments. Mixing assholish behavior with praise heightens the value of the praise. People will work harder for the praise. Contrast is king.
Being assholish too much and/or in non-appropriate situations will get you tagged as an idiot though. It’s all about calibration.
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On the few occasions people have stared past me when I was speaking to them, first I looked where they were looking to see what was so interesting. Is somebody on fire out there? Somebody being arrested? Or at least somebody in a funny hat?
If no funny hats were forthcoming, I assumed that either I was boring them or that I was dealing with an Aspie who was very uncomfortable in my presence, and politely excused myself from the conversation.
Being around someone who refuses to meet your gaze is very uncomfortable for us non-spergs, and not in a “Wow, he’s so mysterious and interesting, I must get to know him better!” way.
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I, and most people in the south, take it to mean the listener is being submissive, not dominant.
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Yes, I agree with this. People who will not look me in the eye are people who I don’t trust.
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This. I find intense sustained gaze to be a more dominant trait. Just look at animal world for instance, the dominant alpha is the one who maintains the longest unwavering gaze and the submissive ends up looking away.
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think: intense gaze for the first 5 min followed by staring past you when what you say bores me.
read: your value isn’t coming from whatever incomplete demonstration of partial knowledge you are regaling me with.
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This is for me exactly how I set the frame with anyone.
I focus on the right eye, which works for me. I look away as necessary once there’s been that initial lasering.
∞
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@ PetiteOlive – He’s note advocating looking away in a submissive way.
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Exactly, if a man won’t meet my gaze I always think less of him.
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It’s funny you should put it that way, because three (or maybe four) out of these five items are exactly how someone with Asberger’s would behave.
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That’s because those people didn’t embody the alpha characteristics that you find so appealing. They were zombie listeners, preoccupied with some banality and simply couldn’t be bothered to acknowledge you with their eyes. They stare past you as if frantically searching for the nearest exit. They may mutter a few pleasantries before abruptly ending the conversation, and leaving in hastened, beta steps.
The alpha, on the other hand, will also stare past you but his modus operandi will greatly differ from your typical zombie listener. He appears to ignore you in his cocky way, when in actuality, he is thoroughly analyzing your words without showing the slightest sign that he is doing so. When he graces you with his reply, you are taken aback by its lucidity because you erroneously assumed he paid you no mind. He delivers his answer with a cocksure attitude that resonates from his alpha body language, and you gauge his speech to be meaningful and authoritative. You can’t help but crack a small smile because he has tacitly demonstrated his higher value to you. Cue ‘gina tingles.
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No, not really. I don’t like being interrupted continually either. Nor being made to wait. Sure, sometimes people get stuck in traffic and sometimes they misread verbal cues and think their interlocutor is done talking when he is not, but a person who does those things *habitually* is demonstrating a rudeness and entitlement that I find very off-putting. Nor am I alone in this–men and women alike dislike being treated in this fashion.
The King gets away with rudeness and entitlement *because* he is the King; because for whatever economic or social reason others have no choice but to tolerate his behavior. He doesn’t become the King by being rude and entitled.
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Of course you’re not alone in feeling a disdain for rudeness and undue entitlement from others. This feeling stems from your belief that these rude and entitled people are undeserving of their off-putting behaviour because they are either of the same or a lower social class than you. Take a waitress at a greasy spoon, for example. If the bitch gives you a whole lotta ‘tude, doesn’t loom you in the eye and makes you wait a long time for your order to arrive, you’re going to hate her for it. It could even be a co-worker who is considered your equal, and reports to the same boss as you. When he fails to meet your gaze and frequently interrupts you in mid-sentence, you’re going to interpret his behavior as very off-putting.
You’re right about the people tolerating the King’s rudeness and entitlement because of his elevated socio-economic status. Regardless of whether the throne was inherited through lineage or violent overthrow, the King did not become a powerful figure by appearing modest and meek. He had to stake his claim as a superior man among the horde of plebes, and thus, distinguished himself through warranted arrogance and righteous entitlement. Actions speak louder than words, and it is precisely through acts of social dominance that he exacts his respect from his subjects. In other words, to move up you have to push someone down. Not necessarily in a literal sense, but in the deeply cutting pyschosocial sense which subconsciously reigns over you.
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Good comment, but mostly I wanted to tip the hat to your handle. The peacocky exaggeration makes me laugh.
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beta bait
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You quite right. None of these little omegas in their Kenneth Cole square toed elevator shoes is going to get to be King just because they behave like a rude little twit.
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Whoever wrote this post should start writing for a living. It’s so beautiful.
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OIC
Act like a shitty lawyer. Got it.
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Basically be like Saul Goodman, but not like a whiny bitch.
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“Making people wait”
I had a chick use that ploy on me recently. She deliberately showed up 15 minutes late. If the girl is using a ploy from the get go it flags her as a person to be avoided. It’s always a bad sign when someone is using a ploy and it makes me not trust them.
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she won dumbass.
Wait 5 and jet. Make her chase.
Freaking amatuers.
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I don’t see how she won. Winning, for women is getting into a relationship with a man they find attractive and admirable. Presumably, she found Levon attractive or she wouldn’t have gone out with him, but her behavior has run him off (I assume).
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he presumable stuck around and counted minuites. beta bait.
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If waiting the 15 was a mistake, could you salvage it thusly?:
See her walk in, give her the upbeat-yet-sarcastic, Patented Bruce-Willis-Smirk, finish your drink, put the glass down, say, “You’re late.”,
and then stroll out of there with a boss-but-fun attitude, like Frank Sinatra strolling downtown to hook up with some bombshell actress?
Ie: not butthurt at all but: Oops, I must have forgotten something! Ok, cool story, bro! -laters! -type of vibe?
+Maybe even do YaReally’s “Soft Next” after, also?
-or would all of this be too late at that point?
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I agree with a lot of the post, but use it in a much toned down manner. As for the eye contact, I hold it long enough for them to look away, and I am never stone-faced. I have been told my gaze can be piercing at times and I use it to my advantage.
Instead of the king, I equate it more to being a superior raptor like an eagle. You know you are the baddest ass in the forest, but you don’t squawk about it like some beta pigeon would with ruffled feathers.
I guess the moderating of it comes with age and wisdom, because the hard game doesn’t always work, especially if you run up against an unentitled female that interests you.
Keep the faith CH… (thumbs up)
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@Mike: The Brits have a saying: “Lions don’t need to roar.”
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Michael Caine once made an astute observation viz. acting as an upper class character, saying that people with power speak slowly; people without power speak quickly. This is very true.
I would add that it can be very effective to speak relatively softly, since it forces the listener to shut up and pay attention/listen intently to what you are saying.
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In keeping with one of the “lady lessons” I’ve imparted to my daughter: “A lady never yells.”
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Exuding confidence in whatever you do goes miles towards attracting women. Having an inner calm that shows you know what you are doing and have experience, even if you don’t know exactly, is prime alpha without being an a$$ hole.
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Making people wait is OK within reason. Fashionably late is OK, late enough so that people start forming a clique against you, is not.
Not laughing at some wannabe alpha’s jokes, are about the easiest way to knock him off his self appointed pedestal. Most of the time, betas and women will laugh any uttering, no matter how pointless, from the one they perceive as the alpha of the group. Even something as banal as him saying aaaaah! If you don’t even recognize that he said something, you will notice he will start looking nervously over at you next time he tries to be funny. Congrats, you have flipped the script, and upstaged him.
Starring most people is another one of those “in moderation.” At some point it crosses the line to outright weirdness. But nothing is more offputting that someone who seems to want t crawl under your skin with the all encompassing dedication of his attention paying.
Cutting people off works short term. Unless your authority derives from somewhere else; like job title or you genuinely have more important things to say than other people; people will simply start routing around you over time. But in a one night bar setting, it is golden. A good defense would be to call the offender out about his lack of manners; then counter his reply with somethhing along along the lines of “some of us have mothers that taught us manners..” With a condescending smile, of course.
Again, disappointing people is a very short term strategy, unless you have externally derived authority. If a bum holds out his hand, but withdraws it as you are about t hand him a dime, you just move on past him.
IF you have externally derived authority, say you are the boss and want to boink your subordinates, all of the above are golden. But if you are not, I doubt disappointing he who are, or cutting him off, or making him wait is a long term winning strategy. Unless he is very much aware that he is nothing without you, and is basically a ceremonial figure, at least.
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Hmm…
“Making people wait”? I tend to be Prussian punctual. Perhaps I shouldn’t be.
“Not laughing at jokes”? Yeah, I should definitely work on that. I’m the one who laughs when nobody else does, even though lame jokes don’t appeal to me anymore.
“Staring past people”? I’m a natural at this, but not when it comes to attractive women. Been working on doing so for hotties too. Getting there.
“Cutting people off”? I got this one down, actually.
“Disappointing people”? Not many opportunities for this, at least not yet.
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The king strikes an asshole pose because it will give him the attention he craves while within he is still a vacuous child.
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This comment is just begging for a Heartiste edit.
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The nigger strikes an asshole pose because it will give him the attention he craves while within he is still a vacuous subhuman.
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What is your opinion on doing whatever the hell I want…whether it is the Alpha thing to do? I can’t think of any examples, but I do things and pay no attention as to what it conveys. I do them because I have deemed them necessary.
As for someone arriving late, if you are late, you are not allowed to participate.
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“http://hel-looks.com/20130302_02/
@hearteste: @rooshv Tough one. Classic butterface. Btw, I know a dude who has visited every Euro country, and he says Romanian girls are the hottest.”
If you consider that a butterface, te salut Don Corleone.
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Yuck. A five-head on a deformed skull that looks like the doctor had to clamp down on her noggin with the jaws of life to pull her from we mother’s womb.
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I know! and did you see those pointy elbows?
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My lord, art thou holding court in the power mad DC? I wonder if here in Bible Belt urbanism, and most places, the courtesan skins are much thinner. I find that even hot women–7 or 8 by your lofty standards my liege, and I don’t find higher in these lands–need some reflecting validation off my countenance or any burgeoning attraction dies. I am not a rock star, financial star, etc, just a student of acting who wishes to win consolidations in those areas. Yet, even if I were with such obvious successes, I still think these ladies would need affirmation. I have erred on the negging or aloof side far more than the validating side. Perhaps it is a matter of maintenance more than initiation, to be so aloof. But could it be, the ruthless bitchiness of DC?
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You get extra leeway with being late in DC because the traffic is so ridiculously, unpredictably awful…and because there is a ban on texting/using a handheld cell phone while driving. So you can be running late with no real way to let people know.
But the rest of it? If you get away with it, it’s only because you are in a position of serious power already. And even then…I’ve met a few people who would qualify as “powerful,” and the vast majority of them are polite, even engaging.
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Interesting field report info, @RP. Maybe ’tis better to comport oneself as a politician rather than a king, though overlap is not precluded. In the substance of what one does, covertly looking out for number 1 as a king is no doubt the right thing since in decline the observing of outward convention is a guarantee of being wronged. In oligarchic democracy slime-kings rule. Con-kings, maybe? I recommend 48 Laws of Power.
[CH: The key to making these alpha male power moves work for you is judiciousness. You don’t want to be dickish all the time. Only some of the time.]
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The show House of Cards is a good illustration of this. The (likely gay) Kevin Spacey does a fantastic job of playing a super-alpha senior Congressman, who vacillates rapidly between southern gentleman charmer and ruthless alpha.
In one circumstance (or moment) the character is all smiles and glad hands, in the next he is making aggressive power plays.
My favorite exchange between the main character and a 30-years younger reporter he seduces
Francis: Do you have a man who cares for you? An older man.
Zoe: No.
Francis: But you’ve been with older men before.
Zoe: Yes.
Francis: Then you know they hurt you. And after they hurt you, they discard you.
Then he bangs her. And, scene.
[CH: House of Cards… fine show. The writing in it… very familiar. The ideas and the quips and the camera-facing narrative remind me of an… old friend… from back in the day.]
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There’s nothing “likely” about Kevin Spacey’s gayness. Spacey is a gay man. He is also a master impersonator, which in this world is not a “nice-to-have” but an absolute requirement for a gay man.
Spacey moved to the UK and was for years found by the local papers to be “walking his dog in the park” late at night…. mmyeah.
Playing a straight man, he is perhaps more forceful because he is playing the role as a character. Again, he’s a phenomenal impersonator.
P.S. I read a fun discussion about that show the other day and how it was innately silly… lemme find that…. here. http://reason.com/archives/2013/03/05/dc-is-capital-of-the-absurd
∞
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CH, this would seem to contradict Dog Training 101, no?
Be consistent in punishment, and inconsistent in reward. This is what I do, at least, but I am a student, not a master.
∞
[CH: These power moves aren’t about reacting to a woman’s behavior, good or bad. They are general purpose lifestyle attitudes that are neither punishing nor rewarding. What they are is status enhancing.]
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10-4, 5×5.
∞
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“I feel [dickish]
Oh so [dickish]
I feel [dickish] and witty and gay
And I pity
Any girl who isn’t me today..” 🙂
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New batteries arrive for the vibrator, Kate?
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No, silly. I do not own a B.O.B.
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You should see her buttplug collection, however.
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*Ahem* I believe someone was going to harness their enthusiasm? Bad boy, caving already. Anyway, babyface, minimalists are not collectors, and certainly not of that variety.
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OK Kate, that was some funny shit. Excellent volley.
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Kate realizes that proper skin care is an alpha male power move.
And yes, baby, it’s hard to maintain discipline when I’m suffering from spasms of nice-girl lust, one of the subtlest jonesings that’s ever tickled a sack.
And yes, if you become too hopeful and smiley, I’ll be able to move on that much more easily.
Finally, it saddens me that you neglect a fundamental erogenous zone. I imagine it’s largely unexplored territory — best that we never meet, then. 😉
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This reminds me of a comi-sweet line from the movie, Under the Tuscan Sun when the Italian realtor says to the American protagonist: “Signora. Please stop being so sad. If you continue like this, I will be forced to make love to you. And I’ve never been unfaithful to my wife.”
Its all for the best. With our mismatched looks, people would think you were my son! I am sure this is why Heartiste keeps us apart 😉
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More WordPress than CH, milady. The course of true love did never run smooth, & etc.
Though I could perhaps qualify as your (only slightly) younger brother, but I’m afraid I would be a mischievous relative in any case.
I’ll look for your reply in 18-30 hrs. 😉
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O/T but I find this discussion to be aptly titled “Unhappy feminist is unhappy, unfeminine.”
http://www.althouse.blogspot.com/2013/03/seems-like-lot-of-twentysomething-women.html
Maybe belongs in the modern world making you crazy category, but Althouse correctly observes that male biz success is centered mostly (90%) on getting bitches while 10% of men are just that gay to be successful on its own merits.
But feminists have career above everything as the goal for women, so it’s no wonder that women aren’t being served by feminism. Especially when the secret comes out that biz success will not equal mating opportunities for the ladies like similar success would for a man.
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I hope this is supposed to be for how to treat women because if it’s how to generally conduct yourself results will be disappointing. Sure be an asshole to women but act like that around OTHER ALPHAS and see how long they will put up with your shit.
Even Tom Leykis suggests being cool to other guys.
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Tom Leykis is the man
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I would be very interested in a field report from Denmark. I do all of these things. Instinctively. It doesn’t work.
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i live in denmark too, and it works fine for me, but as walawala writes further down in the thread, you need to be perceived as high value for it to work.
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I find being late completely beta, but then again I’m a control freak and think a real man should be in total control of his world.
The rest are solid, but are just the end result of improving yourself in other ways, in ways that can’t be faked until made.
[CH: Wrong. They can be faked, and if faked long enough will be made. See the archives for “power pose study”. Revisiting this theme is getting tiresome, so any future trollish comments along these lines will be banned.]
But if it does and it gets you tail, good on ya.
[Fake it till you create it. That is the practical essence of game.]
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Dissent is trolling? You’re drunk with power, sir.
[CH: I’ll have another barkeep.]
I’ll agree with the body language things, but you can’t fake being too busy to attend to everybody’s whims without busting your hump and making a success of yourself.
[Sure you can. Just ignore them for a bit.]
But I see your point. As I slowly move up the professional world, it has been dawning on me that most people, even the high up elites with power and money, have no fucking clue what they are doing. People who have been in a field for 30 years are still lost half the time. Essentially, they are faking it until they learn. It’s amazing how much is still accomplished though. I guess that’s just what they call risk taking.
[Faking it till you make it is also a good way to actually do something besides yak. At least faking requires a concentrated effort.
In print, these dickish moves seem like they would be off-putting to normal people, but in the field, I have seen it happen too often where some dickhead looks around bored when someone’s talking to him, or shows up late like everyone was waiting for him, and people still love bim for it, to believe any longer in the myth that alpha male dickery is self-evidently anti-social.]
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I am consistently 5 to 10 minutes late for everything in my life, and assume people will wait. Punctuality, to paraphrase Leona Helmsley, is for little people.
And yes, people do in fact love me nonetheless, both personally and professionally. Maybe BECAUSE of this.
P.S. The “looking around bored” move only becomes alpha if you interrupt the loggorhea and inject the conversation with something substantial. If you don’t add any value yourself, then yes, you’re just a dickhead.
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I would say making her wait 5 to 10 minutes, in a public location, is about right. You can get make her wait a little longer, if she’s at home. Any more than that, and it starts to be inconsiderate. Also, no apologies or explanations for it, all she gets is a shrug if she says anything.
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Jason
I am consistently 5 to 10 minutes late for everything in my life,
———————————————————————-
Black people are notorious for being late. If you are a white person, next time you see a black person, ask them what “CP time” is;
(make sure you duck)
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Heh. In SEA we use, “American time”
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Yeah, I was dating a black girl a while back whose initials were CT. I loved negging her about “CT time”. She was always an hour late, every time.
Me: 10 minutes late, max.
Down in South America they call punctuality “horas ingles”.
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re: http://hel-looks.com/20130302_02/
She has the face of a lipsticked potato but the hair is nice. Reasonable legs but I worry about a doughy flat butt. Clenching her hand with all the grim tension of the born cutter.
That said, the 17 year old grip must be like running butter.
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How about a post explaining how to respond to those tactics without going nuclear?
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Sometimes nuclear is appropriate. If someone habitually cuts you off you need to lay some foundational rules. Straight up call them out on it. I’ve found no one likes to be told they’re rude outright.
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The “nuclear” I’m describing is more along the lines of giving a cockblocker an atomic wedgie.
Thank you though. I know that a lot of people refrain from calling others out on bad behavior. I’d like to know more about how to do that in a more subtle, non-bitter, outcome independent manner. I think that my set would be dead if I tell her friend to shut up while adults are talking.
Might just be a problem for me as I’ve been described as “intimidating” (I don’t see it) and my body language is often commented on.
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INTERRUPTION. Let’s say you get interrupted by a guy named Dick who starts droning on.
Say, loudly enough to drown him out, and in a voice that is friendly yet intently wants to tell him he’s missing something: “Dick! Dick! Hey, Dick! Hey! Hey, Dick! Dick! Listen, Dick! Hey, Dick! Listen, buddy! Hey!” Eventually, he’ll shut up. Then resume your monologue.
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Another equally powerful way to dominate is to ALWAYS be on time and start on time. People are still left reacting to your moves.
For more on this check out:
Power- Korda
48 Laws of Power – Greene
Winning Through Intimidation – Ringer
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Exactly.
The Steve Jobs biography describes an occasion where the CEO of an Apple partner decided to show up late to a meeting between his team and Jobs’ team to “show Jobs who’s boss.” Jobs didn’t wait. He started the meeting on time and took control of the meeting through force of personality. By the time the CEO showed up things were running on Jobs’ agenda. The CEO was forced to acknowledge Jobs’ alpha and take a backseat.
Follow that example if someone pulls this on you.
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Yeah, I find the “show up late” thing annoying and juvenile. On any customer call I make, I tell anyone that is coming with me, “on time is late”. And I am pretty brutal about it. This is about money, people. And respect.
On the social side, I used to run a pretty large group of boys and girls in NYC. They all had the message right quick – show up on time or lose out. No need for enforcement – compliance was expected and it happened or they were dropped from the call list. Whilst this wasn’t about money, it definitely was about respect.
Jobs was a real Alpha in my book. Perhaps he was actually a Sigma that learned to rule over other men. However it happened, he is missed.
∞
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“Another equally powerful way to dominate is to ALWAYS be on time and start on time. People are still left reacting to your moves. ”
Agreed. And the Quiet Professional frame actually intimidates fuck ups who know they are fuck ups, which is many people, bien sur. My superiors know that I perform at full throttle, don’t dick around playing games, and perhaps more importantly, don’t suffer fools gladly, and I am de facto their peer in many respects. I find my actual peers tend to defer to me without me having to be a dick about it with them, but like most things, it doesn’t hurt to have the dickish arrows in your quiver for prudent deployment.
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The key is among the tech crowd, Jobs was an comparative Alpha.
If he wasn’t already in control, his attempts would have backfired.
I’m sure that Jobs also pulled off the “show up late” routine countless times.
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He also pulled the fire you in front of hundreds of people routine, the I will bury you vendettas, the daily flaying of his subordinates’ souls, etc.
My personal favorite is this one. It doesn’t even matter that this was FakeSteve and not Steve. It’s just perfect. Exactly as he would have done.
http://www.fakesteve.net/2009/12/a-not-so-brief-chat-with-randall-stephenson-of-att.html
“First off, before we even start the call, we’ve got problems, because shithead won’t get on the phone unless I’m on the line first. Like, Ja’Red comes in and says we’re ready to go, and I go, You mean Randall is on the line, and Ja’Red says, No, his assistant is on the line and once you get on then they’re going to get Randall — so I reach down, hit the button then hit it again so the call gets terminated. I tell Ja’Red to explain to these motherfuckers that Steve Jobs does not get on the line first, ever. Ja’Red does this, but Randall’s assistant insists Randall always gets on last, and especially so in this case since AT&T is about three times the size of Apple, so this time I pick up the phone and tell the assistant that he should inform Randall that when he’s ready to get his pointy head out of his ass and call me, I’ll be here waiting for his call.”
∞
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Hmmm the guy that came to my mind who does most of these things is a douchebag at work who just pisses people off in doing these things more than anything. Kisses the right ass to get what he wants. It’s funny he doesn’t try dickish moves on chicks though. Hence probably why his GF is a gratingly sarcastic 6.
I once got so pissed at his cutting me off I yelled in rage EXCUSE ME DON’T CUT ME OFF IT’S RUDE. In front of the office. He hasn’t cut me off since. Don’t tolerate dickishness yourself. Leave it to the ladies to lap that shit up.
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DOMINATE! Keep pushing to see where the boundaries are. Becoming outcome independant helps. When you simply dont give a fuck, all the manuvers CH is kicking to you will work.
And why should you care how the interaction goes? You think Saddam gave a shit when some arab sheik came to see him?
Imbrace your inner Hussein!!!
Drop chemical warfare on the situation, fart right in the middle of the conservation then smirk and walk off. Fuck it. Who gives a shit?
The only bad thing as far as I can see with any of this game shit, is the more success you have w/ women the less you will respect them. Depending on how beta you were when CH found you will ultimately determine how much of your soul will be cut out.
No one said freeing you from the lies wouldnt hurt.
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He looked a little nervous before he was hung.
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I didnt think so. In fact I think he told one of the hangmen to go fuck themselves.
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Saddam died like a man. That cannot be taken away from him. He sneered at the masked mob that killed him. He walked to take gallows like he was still in command. They cringed from him even as they killed him. It was a noble sight.
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“He looked a little nervous before he was hung.”
That’s because he wasn’t a well-hung kind of guy!
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Hanged, Kate, Hanged!
White men wanna be “hung like neegers”; neegers get HANGED.
Get it?
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Oh dear. lol
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I think it should be said you have to understand basic core principles of game before you use these moves. Without charm, escalation and rapport you’ll just be seen as a useless omega.
“All aloof, all the time makes Juan a dull boy.“
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Sounds like the person I used to be. It comes almost like a second nature to me, who think everyone is wrong. Then I realise I was isolating myself from my friends, my family (except my father, who’s pretty much just like me), and my then girlfriend. The tactic is effective to impress, even assert immediate leadership to strangers but do the exact reverse to people close to me. Switching between different facades, the King, the Joker, the NiceGuy, the Lawyer, the Abuser, the Hero, etc.. works Sticking to one or two, like Alpha, or Beta, will no achieve any long term goal.
The Prince is way better than the king at manipulating people’s emotions
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So what do you do if someone pulls these moves on you? Fight ’em?
[CH: Love ’em.]
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Pick at every single statement of them with an argument. Kings hate to lose argument and lose his cool and temper very quickly if he does. The trick is to be slimy, sarcastic and non-committing. Make them look bad by making mistakes and contradicting themselves. Of course, a King can also play this game pretty well if he caught on, but since he already babble a lot about himself, he’s at an disadvantage. When he opened his mouth to try to cut you off, yell back “Let me finish first. Show some civility”
However, a smart King will just ignore you if you talked to him directly, so point out his flaw to the other people he was talking to. If it’s 1-on-1, just leave.
Other tactics like “making people wait” and “showing up late” are just childish, not a King’s move. Point out his lateness, and criticize his lack of time management. Always bring it up in later dates/meetings.
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You sound like a catty woman.
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*king
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All they have to do to neutralize all the shit you said is turn it around on you with a cold-read that puts you on the defensive and makes you qualify yourself.
“Pick at every single statement of them with an argument.”
They calmly say “You’re very argumentative.” and stare at you. Or if you’re with a group they can add on some social pressure by asking them “Is he always like this? lol”
“The trick is to be slimy, sarcastic and non-committing.”
Same deal. “You’re very sarcastic. It’s okay man, you don’t have to be all hostile ‘n shit with me lol you seem like a nice dude. :)”
“Make them look bad by making mistakes and contradicting themselves.”
Frame control here. “You just contradicted yourself.” “lol I guess. (shrug) So anyway…” “No but you said this then this” “Dude, relax lol Why are you so hostile? It’s cool man, we’re all friends here. :)”
“When he opened his mouth to try to cut you off, yell back “Let me finish first. Show some civility””
lol…a simple “wow lol You’re kind of high-strung today hey? It’s cool man, tell us your story.” (now it’s an order and you’re telling it on his terms, not yours, he’s giving you permission to tell it so if you tell it you’re following his order which makes you lower value, and if you don’t tell it, you’re frustrated and seem weird because a second ago you wanted to tell it…he just usurps your leadership).
“so point out his flaw to the other people he was talking to.”
Doesn’t work when the other people like him and see him as high-value. You will just look like a petty drama queen. If they ever mention it to him he just blows it off with a “wow, that’s weird, they never said that to me. I wonder why hd is so hostile…he seems like a nice dude to me, I don’t know why he wouldn’t just let me know he has a problem with me. Thanks for letting me know, but hey I guess you can’t please everyone hey? lol”
“Point out his lateness, and criticize his lack of time management.”
Same deal as the start. “wow lol I didn’t realize you take showing up to a bar so seriously man. Relax dude, it’s a fun night you don’t have to be all high-strung. I had to take a huge shit lol So anyway…”
“Always bring it up in later dates/meetings.”
Again “lol are you still bringing that up? That’s weird, man. It’s cool that you’re so organized and on time but I don’t know why you’re so on my case about it. Relax dude, it’s not a big deal, life is short ya know? Why get yourself all worked up over something so small? 🙂 So anyway…”
Easy shit.
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They calmly say “You’re very argumentative.” and stare at you.
“Is he always like this? lol”
“Yes I am. Problem?” and stare back
“You’re very sarcastic. It’s okay man, you don’t have to be all hostile ‘n shit with me lol you seem like a nice dude. 🙂 ”
“Oh no man, you got me totally wrong, I was just giving you pointers.”
Frame control here. “You just contradicted yourself.” “lol I guess. (shrug) So anyway…” “No but you said this then this” “Dude, relax lol Why are you so hostile? It’s cool man, we’re all friends here. 🙂 ”
“Geez I am pointing out your mistakes like all good friends do. Wanna hear more dude?” (pat him on the back)
lol…a simple “wow lol You’re kind of high-strung today hey? It’s cool man, tell us your story.” (now it’s an order and you’re telling it on his terms, not yours, he’s giving you permission to tell it so if you tell it you’re following his order which makes you lower value, and if you don’t tell it, you’re frustrated and seem weird because a second ago you wanted to tell it…he just usurps your leadership).
Cut him off at the “lol” and keep telling my story xD (I don’t even need to hear your excuse, and you’re just lol-ing awkwardly)
Doesn’t work when the other people like him and see him as high-value. You will just look like a petty drama queen. If they ever mention it to him he just blows it off with a “wow, that’s weird, they never said that to me. I wonder why hd is so hostile…he seems like a nice dude to me, I don’t know why he wouldn’t just let me know he has a problem with me. Thanks for letting me know, but hey I guess you can’t please everyone hey? lol”
Not gonna happen, if I just told them a funny story about “this dude I know”. They can just make their own connections. If confronted, “dude, who are you talking about?”
Same deal as the start. “wow lol I didn’t realize you take showing up to a bar so seriously man. Relax dude, it’s a fun night you don’t have to be all high-strung. I had to take a huge shit lol So anyway…”
“Dude, showing up at bar is serious biz, bro. So anyway, I also know this really weird guy who keeps showing up late at bar” (yep, I’m argumentative here. Problems, bro?)
Again “lol are you still bringing that up? That’s weird, man. It’s cool that you’re so organized and on time but I don’t know why you’re so on my case about it. Relax dude, it’s not a big deal, life is short ya know? Why get yourself all worked up over something so small? 🙂 So anyway…”
“lol just pointing out that you’re late all the time. Why so defensive? It’s not like I was judging you (Really, you’re just being defensive right there)
easy shit.
try harder, bro.
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Dude, your keyboard combat doesn’t mean much. A lot of us here have spent a lot of time in these situations with mixed groups and recognize how people actually respond. Your responses sound like theorizing, like a little boy talking about how he’d kick the shit out of, like, ten ninjas! YaReally’s sound like conversations and interactions I’ve seen in real life, which is why some of us give his comments credit (no homo).
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Yep. Like no offense but the response to all of your comebacks is basically an “uhh okay man…?” with a glance to the rest of the group and raised eyebrows sub-communicating “wow what’s with this guy? lol”. The same look you give when a creepy dude is hitting awkwardly on a chick-friend of yours and you and her both share that look of “this person is really socially awkward and killing everyone’s vibe but doesn’t seem to be socially savvy enough to realize that so lets kind of roll our eyes at him behind his back and i’mma take a step back and we’ll resume our normal conversation whenever he’s done being weird.”
I know in the imaginary conversation in your head it looks like you’re putting me on the spot and holding me accountable and oooo zing I have to take the burn, but in reality your reactions will just end up with you coming off as hyper-anal and kind of a downer…which is alright you can be that if that’s workin out for you, but a lot of people, especially chicks who seek out good emotions, don’t want to be around that kind of energy.
So I say the same thing to you now that I’d say in real life: lol okay man, you do your thing. 🙂
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Oh and King tends to fall into delusion of grandeur. Exploit that; he might even scream out in frustration: “I AM KING”.
Play the King sometimes. It’s fun, and a great way to lead the conversation. when you see a cute girl who’s not very interesting in conversation, practice the King. A good King will even mix the King persona with the Friend/Listener persona to entice other people to talk about HIS topic, thus mitigate the King’s major flaw, that is talking too much about himself.
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The phony alpha thing is getting annoying. There is a big difference between a true alpha (funny, smart, cool, and makes his beta male friends feel and act awesome) and these phony alphas who have no close friends, exaggerate how often they get laid, and are basically just spoiled brats.
Look at how CH acts, not just what he says: he is funny as hell and tolerant of all the douchey commenters on here. He states strong opinions (getting the party started), but he does not really believe them. Funny, tolerant of beta shenanigans, and party-starting. That’s alpha.
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very well put. It’s really all about calibration.
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Nah, funny, smart, cool, having strong opinions, creating a crowd isn’t alpha. If that’s the case, tons of females would be alpha, and that’s not going to work.
Having big dick is alpha.
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No.
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It all boils down to looking out for number one which is myself and God. Simple Machiavellian and Art of War 101.
Me Inc. exists to serve myself and run by myself.
Since the USA is…
Capitalism = Individualist / Masculine = Personal Goal Fulfillment = Happiness
Communism = Collectivist / Feminine = Personal Goal Compromised = Disillusion & Despair
No wonder so many Americans and married fools are miserable. Misery loves company and seeks to recruit everyone. When people lose hope and incentive why bother being productive?
Additionally, the King rarely apologizes or carry any guilt because it’s the incompetence of his subjects that lead to his error in judgement. He also has high standards and doesn’t give second chances because he has options and the courage and esteem to stand up for himself.
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One thing I’ve noticed in group environments, is when the obvious omega socially awkward type says something all try hard, you know what I’m talking about, when everyone looks away and pretends they didn’t hear him. If you engage him in a authentic and gregarious manner, it’s a quick way to raise your status in a group. Sometimes I’ll laugh at an obvious unfunny some omega says, just to throw the rest of the wincing crowd for a loop. The King enjoys being generous. True generosity is giving when you know you don’t have too.
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Meh, usually the King of this crowd is the gamma of another crowd. That’s because Kings fight each other until one of them becomes gamma, or they’re both gay for each other.
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Yup. A lot of guys I meet are either socially awkward nerd types, or at a club they’re guys who seem a little awkward but are mainly just extremely intimidated by the chaos of the club environment.
I’ll engage these guys one on one when they talk to me and make them feel like what they’re saying is cool and interesting, and make an effort to include them in the conversation with our group, and even throw them into the fire by introducing them to random girls. I know they’re not going to GET the girl and they’re going to fuck up my chances of getting the girl cause there’s no way they’ll be good wingmen, but I have abundance and I know I can get other girls so I don’t care…meanwhile I know that that makes the guy’s night and if he doesn’t go out much, talking to some cute girl could be the highlight of that dude’s YEAR. And sometimes it gets him into a state where he unlocks a more social out-going personality than he normally demonstrates in those environments because I helped him feel more confident/capable and jumpstart his state.
I know HOW to obliterate other guys, but I only use it if they start the competition between us and I turn it off once they chill out and fall in line. Instead of shitting on other guys as competition, I’d way rather help bring them up to my level. 1) Chicks still know you’re the king compared to them but think it’s cool how much value to spread to the people around you and 2) it’s way better to be out with a group of people all having fun instead of part of the group being shy/quiet and lonely in the background.
I actually learned this from a Natural alpha who’s extremely social and I noticed the pattern that he would specifically keep an eye out for when someone in the group is shy/nervous/new/etc. and would make an effort to pace their reality/emotions and then lead them to a better place (“man this club is crazy hey? (pacing) all this loud music and everything, it’s so hard to talk…” “ya :(” “but hey at least there’s all these hot girls around! Man, check that one out!” (leading) “ya! :)” “What’s your type of girl, man? I love blonde chicks, personally!” (comfort/rapport)).
The king takes care of all his subjects and ensures they all feel good emotions around him…that’s their reward for worshipping him. 🙂
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Straight up. I’ve done this naturally for as long as I can remember, way before I found game, as a way to create positive vibe in any given situation. If you’re the dude having all the fun and you pull other people into your gravitational field of awesomeness who normally wouldn’t ever be able to attain that level of social fluidity on their own, they will love you for it.
If you want to make some loyal ass friends who will sing your praises to everyone within ear shot, then this is the shit you do…not bs braggadocio pissing contests while the YaReally’s of the world are in the background manifesting a genuine good time for all.
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Don’t forget how grateful they are for being assisted in a non-condescending manner. Even nerds hate being condescended to. In college one of these guys saved my ass in a class. I had some shit come up and he personally took it upon himself to cover down on me. Saved me from having to re-take a horrendous class. He never would have done it if hadn’t personally made him cool with the rest of the guys. I I beleive GBFM would steer us toward Aesop at this point…
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“Even nerds hate being condescended to.”
Yup. To me it comes down to an overall attitude of “right and wrong behavior”. If someone is being a bully, I’ll call them out on it, even if I don’t know the other person or that other person is obviously super low value or socially awkward etc. That’s just not cool to me and I’m on the victim’s side. So if someone’s excluded from a conversation, to me it’s like “well that guy probably feels left out, I’m going to make an effort to include him in a genuine non-condescending way where he feels like he has value to contribute to the group instead of feeling like I’m just talking to him out of pity.”
Almost everyone can TELL when they’re being condescended to, even socially inept nerds. They just don’t know what to do when it happens so they take it and then go home frustrated and feeling like a loser later and play through a dozen “what I should’ve said” interactions in their mind all night. I know, ’cause I WAS a socially awkward nerd in high school lol
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This ^
Being an asshole to the socially disadvantaged just makes you out to be a prick.
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In other words, be Dr. House.
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Damn, i like this already
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These are also moves that serve to further worsen society. Do we need more foolish status monkeying and ‘act as if?’ They are quite kosher indeed.
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I agree with all of this. Keep them coming
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There is an experience in life that is very, very close to perfection.
Nail a piece of music together with some others in front of a crowd that fooking gets it.
Die-ing tommorrow is always a possibility. The point is to make that into …OK.
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Alison Krauss
We are both of us aspergy, fore-doomed white-trash losers.
But GD, I would like to come her again.
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come in her again… my bad.
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CH, much like Batman, is not the hero betas want. He is the hero they need.
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http://www.ebaumsworld.com/video/watch/82909422/
2:28
Sometimes pure balls just works.
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‘Not laughing at jokes’
Very, very true. If you look at Alpha male gorillas (or any alpha male who is a primate) do you see them smiling or laughing ever? No, they stare and have eyes like Nick Nolte. So who do you see smiling and laughing in the primate pack? Answer: Baby primates and immature, subordinate females.
For comparison here’s a photo of an alpha male gorilla: (http://farm5.staticflickr.com/4095/4896628819_76272c6c9b_z.jpg)
..and here’s a photo of a baby chimpanzee:
(http://farm3.staticflickr.com/2615/4240049260_89a459d59e.jpg)
And finally, just to demonstrate how inverted the image of the Alpha Male is in modern day society, here’s so-called ‘Alpha Male’ Brad Pitt smiling and tilting his head just like a baby chimp:
(http://www.imagensa.com/images/b/brad-pitt/brad-pitt-12/Brad-Pitt_120.jpg)
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it’s not dick behavior. though it’s percieved as dickish by betas and overly self absorbed entitlement princesses. what CH is simply displaying is the inability to be swayed or manipulated. it’s about placing yourself first. if i disagree with someone, i’ll hear them out, but if i disagree, i disagree. if i don’t think your joke is funny i’ll “boo” it.
but most of all it’s assertive. which give’s off a “dick” vibe. but the king doesn’t give a fuck.
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didn’t realize i wasn’t logged in. above comment is mine. fuck posting anon.
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All good stuff. But two things. With regard to this having any impact, there has to be a “value” component to it.
Your tribe, social circle, girls etc etc need to consider you high-value. Otherwise being late just means you’re lazy and unreliable and easily forgotten.
For the “Disappointing people”—it’s the concept of having value and not giving attention. If there’s no anticipation, no value, there’s no disappointment–it’s the fulfillment of an low expecatations.
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Pretty much. For anything to work, the girl has to be interested. Otherwise, she’s just gonna stonewall you
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I do all of this shit and never, ever get called out on it. I will also tell a chick to show up on time to have her waiting. calling someone out for this kind of behaviour in the real world, will make you look massively insecure, and most of the time people aren’t really registrering what’s going on anyway.
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I know a man,who is kind of alpha, and I once said something to him about how he never seem rushed. He told me, “Time is my slave, not my master.” I guess that’s a good mentality.
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One should learn the skill of dominating time.
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Every bar and pool room has an asshole like this. When I used to hang out in bars and pool rooms, I avoided them. They get away with it until they don’t. That’s why there are fights in bars. Around here, it’s why people get shot in the parking lot.
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You’re wrong about the first one – making people wait. That’s not Alpha, it’s passive aggressive Beta. It’s feminine. Alpha is not only showing up on time, it is demanding the same of others as well as being willing to leave when they are late. Being an Alpha is not about wasting other people’s time; it is about not permitting others to waste yours.
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i’ve seen the indians working together to buy up hotels and yemenese buying up shops and asians buying there resteraunts
my friend called me yesterday talking bout the east indians buying hospitals now and making networks of hospitals
said three doctors living in the same house is a lot of access to capital when they don’t spend their money
and they even hire white doctors and everything at least 50 percent he he he
that some king shit to me and how do i get to have that type of situation where i lead that type of effort
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its all cool and the gang till your a doctor and can’t get a job
they took our jarbs
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i can see how the indians are succesful looking at the marriage vows
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Newbie here, still trying to learn.
I’m trying to master the basics of alpha text game. Basically, I texted a girl to hang out a few weeks ago. She was out of town. Not a big deal.
Now a couple weeks later, I texted her again. She’s out of town. Again. Except it’s legit: her sister had a baby. She says she’s free next weekend.
Do I say anything in response? The problem with this is that, even though they’re legit excuses, it feels like negative compliance is building up.
Should I just not respond and text her next weekend? What should I do? What would an alpha do?
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Stop wasting your time texting a girl who’s always busy and realize you have one-itis. Girls sense desperation and love an abundance mentaility.
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Nah, it’s not one-itis. She’s just one girl I texted twice over a span of 3 weeks to hang out. Just one text from my side each time.
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Harrison, u might not see the value in what walawala is trying to say at this time so maybe looking at it this way.
It you were out gaming hardcore and had this girl and a half dozen other potentials in your text queue, would you be coming here to the Chateau and asking us for feedback? She probably wouldn’t seem that special then would she? Why, because she was just another option and you know that if you lose this one then you got what it takes to generate other options.
Focus on that. It takes a while to get there but once you lose this infatuated laser-like focus on one target and spread that out by realizing that you got what it takes to attract plent others within your proximity every year, then i assure you; things will get easy.
This girl will most likely sniff out the vibe you’re giving which is the oneitis. (Hint: it’s not only going to be communicated in your text)
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“You’ve been avoiding me lately, haven’t you? I know you’re shy, but I’m not like other guys. Pinky swear. Tell you what. To prove that, we’re gonna do something different this weekend. You’re gonna cook me dinner.”
And if you’re badass, you can also follow up with something similar to: “Don’t forget to wear your schoolgirl outfit.”
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Should I text something to that effect now, as in the same day as when she said she was out of town? Or should I wait and text this the next weekend or two and just not respond to her last text?
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Ignore the text in which she told you that she was free. Whatever she answers, you can follow up with: “I know it’s a lot of pressure on you. That’s why you can choose the color of the outfit.”
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okay, so you’re saying to still to reply, but ignore the fact that she said she was free.
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Here’s a cookie.
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you arent ready.
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Don’t ask yourself what an alpha would do. Ask yourself what a conqueror of nations would do.
And it isn’t text girls, or ask them what they’re doing. They conquer. And the women are accessories.
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A lot of you are making the same mistake women make when they say “game wouldn’t work on me, I would be able to tell and if someone DARED neg me I would tell them to fuck off, I don’t tolerate jerks!!”
You’re picturing the most assholish blatant worst-case scenario of these things, and you’re picturing someone you dislike, or don’t actively like, doing them so you get all berserker rage over it or think it only works in certain environments or that it makes everyone think the person is an asshole and they’ll only tolerate it because they’re forced to.
This stuff is subtle as fuck and the guy doing it has to be 1) congruent to it (strong frame control that being late is no big deal etc), 2) calibrated enough to know how far to go with it before people will get mad, and 3) charming and aware enough to recover if they cross a boundary with someone.
Cutting people off isn’t like this:
You: “hey so my dad died and–”
Me: “ya whatever, so I had this great burger the other day.”
It’s more like:
You: “ya so I was in Vegas and–”
Me: “oh awesome, did you hit the pool parties? They’re amazing, we got thrown out for causing a shitshow there lol”
You: “–uhh ya no we didn’t get to the pool parties, we were sleeping during the day and–”
Me: “lol ya Vegas is like a hangover 24/7 hey. So tell me what happened there? You guys get into trouble?”
You: “–oh, ya, so we were in Vegas and we (insert your boring story)”
It’s something that, especially if I’m calibrate and come off as generally a positive value-giving guy, you’ll be fine with.
With a girl it’s stuff like:
Her: “I’m from Blah I moved here when–”
Me: “I hear Blah girls are trouble.”
Her: “–uhh, I, lol what noooo we’re not troub–”
Me: “When did you move here?”
Her: “–I uhh like 3 years ago?”
Me: “You sound like you’re making that up.”
Her: “!! Lol nooo I’m–”
Me: “Why do you lie to us drunk people, you monster? Using us for your own amusement like we’re your puppets dancing for you.”
Her: “omg you’re–”
Me: “See I knew Blah girls were trouble. 😉 (backturn)”
Her: “omg!!! No wait–(grab)”
Like it’s not hostile stuff. It’s more along the lines of what you’re going to say is probably boring, and I’m more interested in this other thing, so lets talk about what I want to talk about instead. We can get back to your thing so you don’t feel dejected, because I’m socially calibrated enough to bring us back to your story so you can tell it…it’s just that instead of you telling me your story, I’ve set a frame where I’m telling you to tell me your story (leadership/alpha/dominance/making you react to me/etc).
It’s like when I’m txting a girl at night and know she’s about to go to sleep. I’ll crack one last joke and then tell her “now go to bed and try not to dream about me.” Where she’s still doing the same thing she was going to do (go to bed) but I’ve usurped it and turned it into a command/order and gained a few alpha daddy type points with her.
Staring past people is just the same as body language. Don’t give someone your full attention until they earn it. If you give your attention out to everyone all willy-nilly it doesn’t mean anything except that you’re reactive and jumpy and beta. When someone only has 80% of your attention but they say “ya I’m from Blah” and suddenly you turn and lock on and give them 100% attention it means the world to them just because your interest/attention was an artificially scarce thing to obtain.
There’s nothing aspergersy about it, natural alphas do this stuff all the time. You just don’t notice it in the guys who are good at it the same way a girl doesn’t realize she’s being sucked into push/pull or reacting to a neg. You only blatantly notice this stuff and get offended by it in the guys who suck at it.
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Yo, How do you reconcile this stuff with being a good listener and a good conversationalist in general? I know the question is a bit vague but it’s something I’ve been trying to focus on when I’m out in the field. Like bringing value by being sincerely interested in what someone is saying and leading the conversation in ways that it feels like the person has known you for years etc. I guess they call this deep rapport or something.
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The easiest way to explain it is to keep two things in mind:
1) Only listen to important/interesting things…don’t reward people for telling you boring shit or putting on their face facade personality (“oh I’m great, great, ya the kids are great, ya you know, my job is just great…” for normal people, or for a hot girl when she’s doing the fake “you should buy me a drink, why are you a jerk, that shirt is ugly, I go to Harvard, what do YOU do for a living (like that judgemental way)? what kind of car do YOU drive?” attitude stuff).
When people are legitimately interesting or telling you someting that’s important/personal to them, that’s when you reward them with your full attention and sincere interest.
2) On that note, learn to HELP people share important/interesting things with you. Create a non-judgemental vibe where they’re not afraid to open up to you. Ignore their fake small-talk and jump right into deeper questions that they don’t have automatic responses to. So instead of:
Her: “What do you do?”
You: “I’m an iBanker.”
Her: “Oh…”
You: “What do YOU do?”
Her: “I’m a lawyer.”
zzzzz….none of that is important/interesting information, it’s just bullshit surface level fluff. You can have an entire conversation like that and walk away not REALLY knowing eachother. Contrast that with:
Her: “What do you do?”
Me: “Get into trouble, mostly.”
Her: “lol, no seriously, what’s your job?”
Me: “Fuck, everyone around here keeps asking me that. Why do the chicks here keep asking such boring questions? You go first, what’s YOUR job?”
Her: “I’m a lawyer.”
Me: “Do you like it, or do you do it because it’s good money?”
Her: “huh?? ummm I like it.”
Me: “You must be the strict no-nonsense type…I don’t know if we’d get along, I don’t take life very seriously.”
Her: “oh I’m not that strict! I love to laugh.”
Me: “I know, I saw you roll your eyes to your friends when I came over to say hi. Jerk.”
Her: “lol omg no I–”
Me: “You must be good at summing people up quickly, as a lawyer, hey?”
Her: “–uhh well I–”
Me: “Are you a people-watcher? I was when I was younger, I could just sit in a mall food court and watch the people around me. I think what makes people tick is fascinating.”
Now we’re having a deeper conversation where I’m encouraging her to share her real personality with me, and I’m sharing mine with hers. Note that I’m actually sharing less logical information in this version (I never actually answered what my job is), but I’ve shared more personal information about who I am as a person.
This is the stuff that builds a deep connection with people. My friends are always mind-blown by how little logical information I know about girls I hook up with. They’re like “what does she do? How old is she? What’s her last name?” and I’m just like “uhhh I don’t know.” The reality is I know more important stuff about her, like her personality type, her fears, her interests, her view on the world, her sexual interests and kinks, etc.
My friends are slow/inefficient and waste a bunch of time having those surface-level interactions, but I cut through all that right to the core. This is especially effective in the high-end nightlife scenes where everyone is rich and important and putting on flawless pretentious facades. The reason I can make guys and girls in those environments say stuff to me like “I’ve never opened up to someone this quickly before” and “I feel like I’ve known you for years” and have the guys buying me drinks etc., is because everyone else gets hypnotized by the environment and falls into that “let’s interact through our fake personas and try to impress eachother and seek approval” mindset and get stuck in those meaningless interactions…but I shit all over that and force them into conversations where they have to actually think of a reply instead of rattling off some pre-made reply they’ve given in that same conversation a dozen times before.
Guys at the bar are especially bad for this because guys don’t want to show eachother their weaknesses so they all put on a front like they’re badass James Bond’s with no problems and flawless confidence etc. Often with these guys I’ll just purposely be vulnerable/flawed in front of them, but also be cool with being vulnerable/flawed…this signals to their sub-conscious “oh, it’s okay not to be perfect, this guy isn’t perfect and he isn’t judging himself or me, so I can loosen up my persona too”.
So with a dude it’ll look like:
Him: “So what do you do?”
Me: “Get slapped by girls, mostly. Did you see that blonde chick over there? I’ve been chugging these shitty beers trying to work up the balls to go say hi but I have a giant vagina tonight lol”
Him: “wha–? lol”
Me: “What’s your type? Blonde? Brunette? I’m a sucker for those damn blondes.”
Him: “lol ehh anything is good.”
Me: “Shit that’s what I’ll be saying at 2am when I’m hammered and hitting on that fatty over there lol I swear this place used to be nothing but hot chicks. You been here before?”
Him: “nah just once…”
Me: “Oh cool, you’re not from around here then?”
Him: “No, I’m from OtherCity.”
Me: “What do you think of ThisCity? I’m not from here so you don’t have to bullshit me, you can say it sucks lol”
Him: “lol well I (blah blah blah)”
And now we’re talking about deeper shit and as I qualify him he’s grateful for my approval and usually he’ll end up asking “What are you drinkin’ man?” and grab me a beer when he gets his next one.
Read some Juggler Method for building rapport. And just focus on asking people questions about what they think and how they feel and what they’d do or have done in awkward/embarrassing situations…encourage them to open up to you, then reward them for it with your attention. 🙂
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Good stuff YR.
Thx.
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I read this and really realize what Game has done for me, namely allow me to turn OFF the social side of me which gives me additional depth and tools. Always been a natural, but also introverted. Had so much trouble blending the paradoxical construct that I allowed booze to smooth me out as an artificial “deaden-er” to kill a little of the intensity. Having the concepts and lexicon has really propelled me, and YaReally, you are one smart fucker who has given me a lot. I’m a smart fucker too, so that compliment may not resonate but it still counts. You can be the Robin to my Batman any day.
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lol glad to have helped.
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I agree with some of the other posters here. This only works on women. On men, you’re eventually gonna try this on the wrong one.
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For some whatever reason, I’ve tried using game on various men, some friends, some strangers, and boy, it fails miserably…Great fun though.
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And you’ve tried this in front of women? Jesus that was pretty embarrassing for the guy the one time I tried it. He’s hated me ever since lol
At one point, I interrupted him just to ask the girl right next to him if they were dating (they always seemed to be together.) She outright said no and that they were just friends. The guy almost turned crimson red and that’s when I knew I got him. He wasn’t gonna pull the shit he had pulled on me before that but that’s a different story.
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Embarrassing for betas, yes. But for alphas…It’s priceless. I remember, a while back, I was out, and I met a long time buddy of mine. Because of the fact that we didn’t see each other for some time, I tried game, not knowing that he also became less beta, and we laughed hysterically for about two or three minutes.
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Yeah, you should generally treat men with more respect than women. Manginas like Hugs Schwyzer excluded.
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For me, it has always been bros before hoes, but a bit of fun can’t hurt.
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Part of being an Alpha is knowing your place in the pecking order. Of COURSE just trying this on everyone is a mistake. But it’s brilliant behavior when you are in charge.
Nothing wrong with sucking up to someone who truly is superior to you.
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Hey. Been hanging around this website for a while, mainly interested in the “being alpha” articles, as I’m starting to think with my cock for a change, which is bloody brilliant by the way, and according to all these articles, being alpha is more about giving the impression of being on top of everyone else with everything, than actually being whatever you want and enjoying yourself. Maybe it’s because of the fact that I’m just starting off, but I get this thought in my mind everytime I see one of these things around, especially this one.
Am I right or am I wrong?
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You’re right. Don’t forget though that this “alpha” stuff is merely about imitating. You fake it till you make it and you think, therefore you become. That type of thing. Other people are gonna start believing it eventually
“Perception is the only reality”
Of course you can get money and get women from that but that takes time. There’s a reason men in their 30s have an edge on men in their 20s when it comes to this. They’d had enough time to build themselves up so now women are interested in them. If you’re in your early 20s, the odds of you coming into a huge sum of money very quick aren’t that great so you have to work with other things, if you have other things.
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You think it, and you eventually become it. Spot on. Looking back on my adventures, I can identify with this. And even though I will never be a proper “alpha”, simply because I just don’t give a fuck, I admire those who are. It takes effort to be congruent on all “battlefields”.
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Basically you brainwashed yourself into something else just to get laid. You sell your soul for more pussies.
That’s even more beta a move than worshiping women.
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Sell your soul? Please, troll harder.
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Besides the soul selling, you’re on the right track. That’s why I dropped it when I realised. The effort is simply not worth it for me.
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Would doing the opposite of all these things help cultivate a pleasant, feminine personality?
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http://www.therulesrevisited.com/
Probably, yes.
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And will this series include self defense lesson for when this is tried in the wrong social setting and someone leaves the King’s guts decorating the floor?
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the best self defense is not caring if you die
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I noticed that:
-Making women wait: it drives them nuts, but in a good way. It always works for me. I always arrive about 20 minutes late if I have a date or something with a girl. They always bitch about it but it’s good and they can’t get enough of it.
-Staring past people: when talking with women I always do it. That makes them try harder to gain your attention. More points for me.
-Cutting people off: I do it sometimes. It has never backfired though.
-Dissapointing people: it shows you have options and you don’t really care if you lose that particular woman.
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I stare women straight in their eyes like I’m inspecting the back of their cerebellum. I do it until they look down submissively.
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Why would the king always be talking. It’s more likely he’d let his jester and his women talk and entertain him will showing very light amusement. The king would mostly just give them direction and steer them in the right direction with as little effort as possible. I don’t see the king being a chatter box and going off about anything because nothing would be that important to him. And while his jester’s going off his steady picking his next lay or amusement.
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Rodney Dangerfield once instructed a crowd that his own mother never allowed him to breast-feed because she only saw him as a friend.
RimShot…
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lol rum wtf dude
if you got that much loot check it
see how many bitches you can fit to sucking on your body at one time
get crazy with the shit bro
quit being fucking tame lol
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Alison Krauss=Neanderthalism(+Rumism)LOL
Jackie McShee=Neanderthalism.
Taylor Guitars=Neanderthalism
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The Indigo Girls – Emily and Amy – got naked in my swimming pool.
Some things are really hard to re-produce.
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“He will not fake laugh to make you feel at ease. He will not laugh uproariously if you are a hot girl making a lame joke.”
I guess that means you never laugh at girls’ jokes. In my experience, women are almost never funny, or at least not nearly as funny as they think they are.
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yea i’m at the club it has two sides the black side and the white side
and ya know
had these chicks on the black side going work it work it
had the whole fuckng black side up on it while i was dancing
on the white side i got told to move along and some white bitch told her husband i said she had nice tits or something
well i didn’t dude was all nice and shit bla bla bla my wife said you told her she had nice tits i’m like no i didn’t tell her that i just was saying hi and the bitch told me to move along or something i’m like she was real fucked up to me
i never get drunk but i got drunk as fuck tonight drunker than i have been in fucking years
like really fucking drunk like 27 shots fuking drunk
and you know what the whte chick who when i came in was all up on my nuts and i told i was gonna get to the point where i shit myself and puke then puke some more and puke and pis myself and not give a fuck
well the bitch got drunk herelf and left the fucking club and i’m there holding my dick
but yea anyway so i’m asking for rides cause i’m not gonna drive and guess who fucking drives me home a black chick that went to the same college as my sister
so i’m like come on in i got some jager and she comes in
and i try to kiss her and she says she don’t do that on the first date
but yea my truck at the club but really i guess you know fuk this shit yo
allthough ok i called a white bitch and she coming over
but still man i think i need a black chick again man
i felt at home like usual on the black side of the club like wtf dude how the fuck
but yea they got there own shit i’m like dam
got teh chicks number so yea gonna call her tomorrow or whatever\
but yea i was like thanks a lot
she said your welcome
saved my ass could of had family come to pick me up but shit wtf man
anyway maybe just fucking go back to the way it was and let a black chick take care of my sillly ass self
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thanks black dudes for making black chicks yo otherwise i’d of had a fucked up night lolzzzzzzzzzzz
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funny shit though white chick lied to her husband bout me saying she had nice tits for him to come fight me or some shit
wild man at least tell the truth the fuck
lieing about some petty shit
wtf
funny part dude had to admit she lieing bitch lol
cause ain’t like he was gonna fight me even though i was drunk as fuck
dam i felt bad like really bad like really really bad
like right now i’m just wtf dude why would she set his ass up like that
and shittest him like that
but yea even if i did say she had nice tits i mean so what hahahahahahaha
she didn’t though and i ain’t gonna lie to a bitch he he he
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so i facefucked this chick and she was trying to get me to fuck her and my dick said no
but she was crying cause talkin bout how she sees me as a friend and then when i was with ex girl i cut her off from me and didn’t talk to her
and if my ex chick came back i would cut off contact again i was just talking to her cause i didn’t have my chick
i’m like yea i mean i don’t love you like that but i can see you trying and yea i appreciate you beeing there for me and being my friend
she like she don’t need me to love her or have relationship just she wants to be my friend and be able to talk with me
i’m like yea ok you can be my friend
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i mean white chick that was at club got a dude but when i walked over to their table she jumped up and GREEEEEEEEEGGGGGGGGGGGG!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!11
and hugged me and shit
i mean she got fucked up to
so i can’t really fauly her that bad she was leaning on her dude basically passed out and shit
but i talked to her dude to about i’m getting drunk as fuck and yea he took her home without telling me but ok i can kind of understand that too i guess hahhahahahahahhaha
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funny shit though is the chick was kissing another chick i’m like you been watching too much tv
first time i ever seen her do some shit like that
talkin bout i don’t know everything bout her she not a good girl or some shit
asked me bout my ex i’m like the adam sandler she fell off cliff died on impact she said you serious
me no lol
told her we broke up
she basically gave me green light on fucking her
goes to show though that once a bitch cheats thats it lol
she cheated on husband with dude she with and now she willing to cheat on him he he he
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gave me number of chick that i touched tit of for the first time in my life though lol i actually called her woke that ass up she talked for a bit and said she was gonna call me tomorrow he he he
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Hey Scray,
you are one of the few people here running experiments with game and discussing it. You should link your e-mail to your screen name so people can contact you in private with suggestions and comments…
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Oh, that sounds like an idea. How do I do that?
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‘Cutting People Off’ – an ideal time for Alpha Man to impose himself on others and abuse their natural politeness is to wait until someone has made a funny remark or just finished a joke. While other people are laughing (Alpha Man never finds other’s jokes remotely amusing) talk loudly over the top of all of them about some important issue that was raised earlier. This creates the impression that Alpha Man is concerned with important issues while others engage in trivial nonsense.
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Meanwhile in Israel…
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Two Things Matter in Life.
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Had an encounter with some cute hostess getting off work at a restaurant I was walking by the other night. I gamed her soooo hard, too. Eye contact, delay, said hey, kept walking a bit, then stopped, paused, and started a conversation. Totally hit it off. Good conversation, moved in closer to her, established some solid contact, some touching.
I think that really, I’ve always been more on the alpha side, but the way I’ve been raised, paired with tv and blah has always made me feel like those alpha characteristics are something to feel guilty about. No more. The alpha is officially out of the bag and he’s about to start filling it with kitties. 😉 😉 😉
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Great stuff. The making people wait thing applies for everything, basically.
Even text or email exchanges. If you hold back and wait, at differing intervals, it not only helps you keep perspective on where things are, and where they are going, but it gets the other person stewing in juices waiting for you.
If you have been hitting their buttons, it will be agony waiting for you, and it will increase the desire for you as they wait.
If you stumbled a bit, the delay in a response will allow you time recalibrate and will tend to erase the fumble with the rush of relief when you finally come through.
I learned through hard experience that being eager kills the desire, and nothing says eagerness like quick responses.
For a recovering Beta like myself, that is a tough nut to crack, but it is ESSENTIAL.
Having other things going on in your life to keep yourself from fixating helps with that, particularly if it is other potential people of interest.
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Good stuff. Quick text replies have been the biggest struggle for me on my pilgrimage to Alphadom. I almost always have my phone handy, and whenever I receive a text message from someone I’m interested in talking to, I’ll shoot back a reply within a minute or two.
I’m blessed with a quick wit, so I’m more apt to get away with this than most guys, but everything you’re saying makes sense. I’ve known intuitively for a long time that it’s a bad habit, but your post really articulated why it’s a bad habit, or, more specifically, why making someone wait is a solid game strategy.
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Im not sure; maybe check the wordpress home page?
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These moves are more ADHD than Alpha.
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ADHD is responsible for a few extremely alpha traits along with excruciatingly beta ones. AlphaDHD tingle inducers:
-Become bored with a task after only a few minutes
-Not seem to listen when spoken to
-Be very impatient
-Blurt out inappropriate comments, […] act without regard for consequences
-Have difficulty waiting for things they want or waiting their turns in games
BetaDHD traits:
-Fidget and squirm in their seats
-Talk nonstop
-Dash around, touching or playing with anything and everything in sight
-Have trouble sitting still during dinner, school, and story time
-Be constantly in motion
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ADHD is responsible for a few extremely alpha traits along with excruciatingly beta ones. AlphaDHD tingle inducers:
-Become bored with a task after only a few minutes
-Not seem to listen when spoken to
-Be very impatient
-Blurt out inappropriate comments, […] act without regard for consequences
-Have difficulty waiting for things they want or waiting their turns in games
BetaDHD traits:
-Fidget and squirm in their seats
-Talk nonstop
-Dash around, touching or playing with anything and everything in sight
-Have trouble sitting still during dinner, school, and story time
-Be constantly in motion
Stop making excuses for white people.
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Great point. There is no excuse. Why do we put up with this shit?
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not too bad really
better than the dude who his girlfriend robbed someone then ran to house she locked her boyfrend out he ends up stabbed by the dude chasing her after a long fight i guess
she was upstairs dong drugs lol
this chick like i’d of done it diferent i’d of hit the dude with somethng to help my boyfriend yea yea
her car got totaled this weekend no insurance
we got history haven;t seen her in 5 months or so
i hugged her when she was crying i thought she was gonna break my spine lol
said she glad i didn’t stop hugging her
all mentally fucked up
yay i get to save the day again
went down to river some dude put a boat in i’m like you want to go for a ride
she like say what
i go over ask for ride in boat
i guess ask and ye shall recieve
something diferent anyway
i guess i got a calming influence on chicks when they bout to lose ther minds
she was tweaking and shit a day with me and ready to go out into the world lol sleeping peacefully actually let her cuddle up on me and shit held her
human compassion maybe i got too much of it but ya know fuck it i like helping people get through some bullshit
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No words to describe…
http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-2291316/Former-Lehman-Brothers-CFO-Erin-Callan-regrets-letting-Wall-Street-career-overwhelm-personal-life-wouldnt-wish-sacrifices-anyone.html
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Yeah; this thread should be renamed, “Alpha Male COWARD moves”.
Nothing worse than trying to lead an organization of insecure, vaginal “tough guys” who all think they are alpha.
(((shakin my head)))
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Once upon a time when “tough guys” got together, thwack, your kind got lynched. Who’s more Alpha, the lyncher or the lynched?
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Test E. Cool
Once upon a time when “tough guys” got together, thwack, your kind got lynched.
—————————————————————————–
And the net result is a communist, Kenyan, gun grabbing, black porch monkey in the white house?
Hows that workin out for ya?
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Nothing but net on that one, thwack.–
As long as WN are White Knights they’ll remain laughable. If they ever start treating their women like the muz, however, then we have trouble.
But it’s not likely, is it?
White men are to blame for feminism. That’s the disgusting truth.
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The lynched.
Alpha males get killed for shagging people’s wives and such all the time. It’s just a hazard of doing business for them. The lyncher however, has no way of un-shagging his befouled beloved once she has been befouled. So the lynched alpha is dead, but the lynching beta is left to live with his shame and failure to protect his women.
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Whereas the lynched have the resurrection to look forward to.
Ah, the smell of negro-babble in the morning… smells like… like… Denny’s Grand Slam breakfast… LLLZOZOZOZOZOZLZLZLZLZLZLZL
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Thought you and your buddy were sitting around playing “guess a pope”, waiting for the right color smoke and leaving us alone to be smart.
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How’s the living on your knees going?
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“To be fair, if you put a bunch of people with similar behavior and mindset together, you’d get something comical out of it.”
Like when a bunch of sexually deviant faggots get together in public and demand “equality”?
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sexual market laid bare in China: http://www.nytimes.com/2013/03/10/business/in-a-changing-china-new-matchmaking-markets.html?src=me&ref=general
notice what characteristics are desired by the men
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interesting. What depths will a race go to to ensure it’s DNA moves forward? Ask Ghengis’ 4 million ancestors hahahaha
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There is nothing alpha about hanging black people from trees. Matter of fact, its the greatest sign of white failure.
Why?
Because once a white person must employ direct violencethey then forfiet the ability to use words to persuade them. Correct master/slave dynamic is never based on force. Its based on respect. Respect rooted in fear is vaginal and unreliable. Respect rooted in honor, ability, wisdom…is masculine, valuable, and ultimatly, much more lethal than the ability to hang a black person from a tree.
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well looky here, if it isn’t the dev- er, I mean the man his self.
where you been Greg?
I was worried you had gone native?
Praise the lawd!
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[…] Alpha male power moves. […]
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