Reader Mailbag: Goosing The Gunt

Email #1

What is the alpha way to suggest that your gf should watch her weight bc she has been gaining weight… I don’t like the passive agressive ideas [listed here].

Actually, some of those passive aggressive methods for getting a girlfriend to lose weight — like buying her clothes a size too small, or signing her up for yoga class under the pretense of “spiritually connecting” — are effective. So it’s a mistake to assume that alpha males never wield the carving knife of passive aggressiveness when doing so would be clearly personally advantageous. However, if you want to go the direct (i.e., lunkhead) route, then I offer the following suggestions:

– Brazenly flirt with thinner women while in her company. Women are hypercompetitive and hypersensitive to their declining beauty, and won’t fail to notice how much hotter are the girls who have grabbed your attention.

– Watch Girls with her and casually remark that you’re worried she’s starting to resemble Lena Dunham.

– Jab a roll of her fat and, with cocked eyebrow, mutter “hm” as if you’re inspecting a backed-up drain.

– Tell her in no uncertain terms that you will leave her if she gets fat. Stare at her stomach while saying this.

– Does she have a fat cat? Pick it up with its huge belly protruding, and tell her you guess it’s true how owners look like their pets.

– Ask if she’s auditioning for The Biggest Loser.

– Start calling her “my little honey boo boo”. If that doesn’t work, call her “my little honey boo boo’s mommy”.

– One morning, when you wake up, look at her naked body and say “What happened to you?!”

– Lose your hard-on during sex.

– Direct her to this blog. In particular, the “hungry hungry hippos” category.

CH will not be held responsible for any chubby girlfriend suicides that result from use of any of the above suggestions.

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Email #2

 I live with my girlfriend who has no job. Should I pay for her or is that beta?

Depends how hot she is.

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Email #3

Since Red Pill ingestion I’ve noticed more subtle shots at my confidence/power from the people around me, as if they recognize (sense?) my alphaness and want to test it. This isn’t just shit tests from women (dates, co-workers), but men as well. Some of these people I’ve known for a while, others it’s my first or second interaction. Clever remarks, wise cracks, etc. They’re all over the place. I brush them off, certainly providing reactions (or inaction) a lesser man (blue piller) wouldn’t understand, and alas we all move forward because I didn’t give a fuck.

Because being unplugged has only been my reality for a few months (and I’m still learning), I wonder if I’m actually being challenged OR if I’m just more aware of the social dynamics/interactions/behaviors of people? Or is it both?

Both. You’re noticing things you never did before, and people are reacting to you in ways they didn’t before. People prefer their beta acquaintances stay predictably beta. A beta who makes a run for alpha disturbs the peace and introduces chaos to the comforting established order. Expect a transitional period from beta to alpha where you have to endure inordinate challenges to your maneuver for the throne. These challenges will be more intense and more frequent the less congruent your behavior seems and the quicker you push yourself into a new identity. This is the most difficult period on the way to becoming a better man, because you will be tempted to fall back on old habits to assuage feelings and avoid burning envy from natural competitors. Whatever you do, stay the course. People will fall in line if by your actions you demand their acquiescence.

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Email #4

I’m on my way home from an interview of sorts. Just before I turn the corner to head to my apartment I see a bar that I’ve had a few good nights at, but haven’t frequented in a while, so I walk in. The place is dead. Except for one solid 8 sitting alone in the middle of the room.

*I’ll skip a bunch of boring details here, but here are some (perhaps) not unimportant facts: We’ve both been in the city for about 5 moths now, I’m from X, she’s from Y*

We engage in conversation. An hour and a half passes.

But this isn’t your run-of-the-mill-casual-conversation-with-a-hottie. It’s deliberate. Calculated. Border-line cold, yet mostly consistent. There are some unspoken acknowledgements: she’s hot, and I know it, and she knows that I know it. I’m good with girls, and she knows it, and I know that she knows it. Sounds like a bit of a Mexican stand-off, eh?

Early in the conversation she had [intentionally, undoubtedly] revealed some information: “…yeah, I keep wasting my time on OK Cupid with these lawyers, all they want to do is argue…” [Translation: I’M SINGLE!!!]

[My brain: What the fuck is an 8 doing on OK Cupid? Is she lying? Is this beta bait to see how quickly I’ll make a move? Then again.. she is at a bar all by herself on a Wed night. How often do you see that out of an 8?]

This would have been a good opportunity for a neg. Ex: “I heard only lovable losers use OkCupid. What’s your excuse?”

The conversation continued slowly and deliberately, but not without intrigue. Our momentum died a few times.

An hour and a half of asexual chit chat is too long. You should have been turning up the heat sooner. Otherwise, you risk momentum-killing dead spots in the conversation.

When it did, I turned to the girl next to me and started chatting in attempt to arouse some jealously and get her to re-engage. She never did.

That’s because you never got her invested in you. You’re just another talkative schlub from her point of view.

The guy next to her tried to strike up a conversation a few times but she quickly blew him off. Each time I re-engaged she quickly re-joined our former conversation.

She likes you enough to talk, but the raw attraction is missing. She’s hoping an attraction will find fertile ground.

And that’s how it went. For a little over an hour.

By the end of the night, I felt pretty confident that I had her in the bag:

Ask yourself, do you sound like a man with an outcome independent attitude that chicks dig?

we had kept up a solid conversation, she had deflected attention from other guys, the vibe was there, she was just playing coy by not re-engaging me (or so I thought)…

Me: *standing up from the bar and putting my coat on* “Hey, I’ve gotta get outta here [pause for a few seconds, look a little distracted]… but before I do, put your number in my phone” *I slide my phone in front of her, on the bar and nonchalantly look away*

Never ask for a number at the end of the night. Go for the number when indicators of interest are there, get it, then just continue the convo as if the number exchange was the most natural thing in the world to have done.

This always works for me. It’s almost guaranteed to at least get the number close.

Her: *snicker* *shaking her head* “No, sorry, that’s now how it works, let’s just shake hands and say goodnight”

I swear I didn’t read ahead in your email. Looks like I predicted her lack of interest correctly. A decent teasing reply to this quasi-rejection would have been, “Shake your hand? Not so fast, you perv!”

[Honestly, my frame is a little shaken by this response. I didn’t expect this at all. Even when I’m dealing with very hot girls, after this much investment (read: an hour of conversation) I almost always get an enthusiastic number close]

I’m going to guess that’s because you typically hit on girls who aren’t quite as hot as this one. The hotter the girl, the tighter your game needs to be.

Me: [surprised] “Oh yeah? gonna keep trying your luck with OK Cupid huh?”

Experts detect a subtle note of butthurtness.

Her: “Yeah, guess so, I’ve just got way too much going on right now. We should just be friends anyway.”

She’s enjoying her sadistic cruelty.

Me: [re-gaining frame] “Ha, don’t be so goddamn presumptuous, maybe that’s all I wanted to be in the first place…” *smirk*

What she’s thinking: “Yeah, right.”

Her: “Oh yeah?… well…. ok then….” *she nonchalantly types her number in my phone*

[Note:] I never did get her name this whole time. Of course she didn’t put it in my phone, so I have no idea what it is.

Me: “Cool, see ya” *I leave*

Did you try to call the number?

===========================

And that’s where I’m at. I maintained a pretty solid conversation with this girl the whole time. There were some definite attraction signals, but I’m dealing with a ball-busting bitch here.

The interaction did not end in my favor. After such a lukewarm number close, how do I re-open and get back in? What maximizes my chances at turning the tables? Advice is appreciated.

Again, did you call her number to check if it was real? You should have dialed it right then after she punched it in. If the number is real, call it and ask for the anonymous girl who pretended she wanted to be friends. If you do manage to get her on a date (long shot), go for the sexual escalation quickly, because I think there is a high risk here she will promptly try to box you in as an LJBF orbiter to guide her around the city as she prowls for alpha thug cock.

Look, she’s out on a Wednesday night alone, so you know she’s interested in hooking up. You know that she knows you’re a bit too smooth for your own good. So she’s got dual ASD bitch shields up: the first is her shield against being perceived a weeknight ho. The second is her shield against the predations of players. She needed you to deactivate her shields, and from what I can tell, you didn’t quite pull it off. You should have played the innocent “me, a player? no way” card, and pre-empted her Wednesday night friend request with one of your own, and THEN proceeded to sexualize the non-verbal aspect of your time together. That contrast is catnip to these kinds of women who WANT IT but don’t want to be perceived as wanting it.

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Email #5

A lot of my army buddies brag about how the military uniform makes ladies swoon for them and gives them a chance to DHV easily with war stories and such. Do you think a military uniform makes for a good game prop?

Day game, yes. Night game, no. You’ll look like a tool if you’re decked out in uniform at an urban nightclub. But during the day, there could be any number of reasons why you’d be wearing a military uniform, and that will intrigue girls.

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Email #6

Women do so much on their birthday it’s ridiculous…Women be pisces….still celebrating on Aries time…..27 acting like its their sweet 16…why do you think that is?

A pedestal atop a preexisting pedestal? What woman would turn that down?

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Email #7

I very new to game, and am learning the art in a rather interesting venue; an engineering university where there are 7 men to every 3 women.

Luckily, I’ve figured out that most of the men aren’t really competition because most of them are seriously hardcore pussy worshiping betas and omegas who don’t even appear on the women’s radar.

That said I only just tried my first approach (using game) last week, which was a big eyeopener as pretty much everything I’ve learned here worked.

Sadly I botched things by getting too enthusiastic later on and trying too hard (figures), but I learned a lot from it and those mistakes will not be made again.

That said there was one thing I observed during my first pursuit:

The (girl’s) Herd.

Like the adorable lemmings they are. Girls survive on social cues. They need the protection and guidance of the herd. This is probably because their vaginas and brains are not on speaking terms.

She mentioned that she had a man-hating roomie,

Amanda Marcotte, is that you?

who (along with other friends I’m sure) probably helped persuade her that I was no good.

Maybe. But I wouldn’t put too much stock in that explanation. A lot of times, the disapproval of a girl buddy will only make a girl more attracted to the badboy who swoops her.

Now, I’m not saying that this is what convinced her to stop texting and start ignoring me, I know I failed a LOT of shit tests and so forth, but I am wondering, how do you deal with the female herd?

Its difficult for me to understand because its not something easily interacted with… or is it? help would be much appreciated!

Befriend the friends. This is Game 101. People are more apt to welcome you into the tribe if you make them feel like you are truly interested in their lives. When I get a convenient opportunity to meet a girl’s friends, I usually take it, because I know that meeting them and winning them over is a fast track to raising my social status. A short cut, if you will.

Also, if you have any advice for dealing with women in a environment with a High male/female ratio that would be much appreciated!

There is one advantage that a high male/female social environment offers, and that is the ability to elevate your value by doing the opposite of all the men around you. High M/F ratios usually mean the men are try-hard desperadoes, because they will feel the pressure of their competition more keenly. That means, a lot of bumbling beta moves, mule-headed insecure paper alpha hysterics, and pushy horndogs. It’s a simple matter to triangulate off that social dynamic by saying to a girl, “I bet you love all these hopeless guys throwing themselves at girls. Look, here comes one now. He likes you, it’s so obvious he can barely contain his excitement.”

Having said that, it is of course, much better to game in a low M/F ratio environment if you are a man. A disproportionate number of women = a disproportionate number of loose women.