Starcucks And The Manlet Manifesto: #AbaseTogether

I’ve thought about writing a “Manlet Manifesto” satire to capture the mitegeist of 2015 America, but I kept coming across real world accidental examples that couldn’t be topped. Then, this dropped in the combox.

Corey duBrowa (check its smug neopuritan face) is the Starbucks SVP of Communications responsible for spearheading the “Race Together” initiative, which asked Starbucks baristas “to write ‘Race Together’ on coffee cups as an invitation to talk about race with customers.”

A national, commercialized dialogue on race! Tomato Certified Fresh. These “””race dialogues””” are never two-way. James Watson tried to have a national dialogue about race and he was meta-killed for it. Eric “brown paper bag” Holder requested a national dialogue on race, and then answered the call by demonizing and hounding innocent whites living in vibrant Ferguson, until the whole place burned to the ground and white blood was spilled.

I don’t know how reading “race together” on my coffee cup is supposed to open a dialogue. “Hey thanks for the grande anti-racism. You know, this really gets me thinking. White men are the worst! Amirite?”

Nor is this campaign very informative about the substance of any ensuing dialogue prompted by an Implicit Bias Flat White. “Race together” could mean “race together to cure the disproportionate black-on-white rape rate”, or it could mean “Race together to a liberal white gated community for a higher quality of life”. Maybe it’s “Race together, but the fucking Kenyan is still gonna win.”

I do know that this leftoid gimmick, and the thousands of others like it, is pure anti-white propaganda with the sole purpose of humiliating whites, and particularly white men, in the homeland of their ancestors. Occupied America, indeed.

The fact that GoodWhites are at the helm of this anti-racism evil, using nonwhite pawns as artillery against BadWhites, tells us that the long-running white intra-ethnic war isn’t out of gas yet. In fact, it seems to be heating up.

Anyhow, all this is prelude to an id fart by duBrowa that encapsulates the mentality of white leftoids. I’ll reprint it here, and call it the Manlet Manifesto, because you’ve gotta read it in full to appreciate the whiny, faggoty, mewling majesty.

Why I deleted my Twitter account, and why I’m back.

Last night, around midnight, I deleted my Twitter account. I also blocked a handful of Twitter users — given the hostile nature of what I was seeing, it felt like the right thing to do. I’ve been a dedicated — some might say obsessive — Twitter user for nearly seven years and as a professional communicator, Twitter has proven to be a valuable tool for me to interact with my professional community, with media, on behalf of Starbucks, as well as “on behalf of me.”

But last night I felt personally attacked in a cascade of negativity.

“I felt personally attacked in a cascade of negativity.” This is a contender for most Millennial shitlib phrase ever. It’s right up there with “Here’s why that’s a problem.” duBrowa is not from the Millennial generation, but apparently the tug of Millennial solipsism is so strong it corrupts two or three preceding generations.

I got overwhelmed by the volume and tenor of the discussion, and I reacted.

I first read that as “terror of the discussion”. A reasonable mistake.

Most of all, I was concerned about becoming a distraction from the respectful conversation around Race Together that we have been trying to create. To be clear, Race Together isn’t about me, it’s about we: and having heard first-hand the number of stories our partners (at Starbucks we call our employees “partners”)

So precious. God forbid this suited up SVP making 100X the typical barista acknowledge that a hierarchy exists. As long as the peons swallow this ego-assuaging slop, it’s all good.

shared with us in the open forums of the past few months, I have thought long and hard about the passion, concerns and painful experiences our people across the country have endured, and wanting to make sure they felt supported by their company.

So no matter how ugly the discussion has been since I shut my account down,

Paging Dr Stephen J Krune… Stephen J Krune to the hate phone…

I’m reaffirming my belief in the power of meaningful, civil, thoughtful, respectful open conversation — on Twitter and everywhere else. I believe in it personally, and Starbucks believes in it at the core of our company’s values. It’s this belief that led us to host a series of open forums with our partners in some of the communities most affected by the recent flareups of racial tension across the country. In those meetings, we heard loud and clear that we, as a company, have an opportunity to engage on this topic, no matter how difficult. You can learn more about those meetings, and about what Starbucks is doing, here: http://news.starbucks.com/news/race-together-conversation-has-the-power-to-change-hearts-and-minds.

I’m going to do the same. I’m only one guy,

Fucking grown man using the androgynizing term “guy” to describe himself. I bet he had a fright when his first nut descended.

and I do actually sleep occasionally (and definitely needed to last night), but I personally will answer the challenge to participate where it’s uncomfortable, and to do so with integrity, openness, and empathy.

Do blacks patronize Starcucks in significant numbers? What is the point of this exercise if most of the customers and Starcucks “partners” are white SWPLs, hipsters, and yuppies? Rhetorical.

Who knows if duBrowa actually believes his own horseshit. My guess is, he does, enough to stain his character. The ulterior motivation is the fear that Starcucks and other big companies with deep pockets and SJW fanbases will be a target of the next Anti-Racism Inquisition coming to their boardrooms, and demanding witches to burn and Danegeld to pay. This shit is starting to get expensive. And companies are starting to figure out that loading up their “partnerships” with diversity dross is bad business and bad for the bottom line. Maybe, they think, the best thing to do is throw a preemptive bone to the rabble to distract them while the company continues hiring competent nonvibrants unobstructed.

Hearteningly, even the white SWPL hipsters have their self-abnegation limits. They’re finding their balls and fucking around with corporate. For example, from the #NewStarbucksDrinks hashtag: “Some of my best friends are black coffee.”

Corey duBrowa, congratulations! Not only have you penned the Manlet Manifesto, you are our White Male Pussy Of The Month! The trophy is a giant black strap-on. May you feel a cold spike of fear every time your… er, wife?… uses it on you.

PS The opportunities for trolling #RaceTogether are endless. CH is starting an initiative called #HateTogether. CH will post videos, pics and audios submitted by readers who trolled the last speck of testosterone out of Starcucks. Send in your small part to open the sort of national dialogue that makes the Hivemind shit its diapers.