Reader “flies” wonders why his text game has such poor reception. Read on, and watch how quickly a girl’s sexual curiosity can turn ice cold when you sound like you’re interviewing her, (or she treats you like you’re being interviewed, and you do nothing to alter her frame).
Hello, I have a question about text game:
I’ve added recently a girl friend in Skype from my little brother’s Internet social circle (she’s living at 1h+ of driving). I was like “let’s add her, practice my text game”.
She’s a cute asian, not hesitate to make sexual innuendos. She talks to my brother a lot, but he’s in orbiter status.
After several days of her accepting my invitation, I have this text exchange, though I was out of state (I couldn’t find anything witty and stuff):
21:07 girl: Hi c:
21:25 me: hey
21:25 girl: how are you?
21:26 me: yea. You look like in great mood.
21:27 girl: Yeeeeah?
21:27 girl: What do you do?
21:28 me: training
21:29 me: you do you train
21:33 girl: yes
22:00 girl: why?
My questions are: Is it bad that I ended it like this? And What I could’ve done to make it progress more? I’m not used to text game, so it’s really tough for me.
The last few times I got a number, it all went down super fast the moment I started texting with the girls I picked up, even if the girl was attracted in person and it went well live. My guess is not enough comfort or lack of escalation (like asking the number before leaving because I didn’t escalate enough to what could’ve been a kiss in person).
My first question is, “Do you even English?” Not snarking you, I’m just wondering if some of your trouble has its origin in your broken English. If American girls are your target, broken English will be an obstacle, unless you’re from a sexy export country, like Slovenia.
My second question is, “Are you especially good-looking or do you possess high social status?” Because if you are as dull in person as your text game makes you sound, then you’ll need compensating attributes for girls to overlook your conversational torpidity.
My third question: “Why are you betraying your brother?” Maybe he’s not interested in girls that way. You should still give him a head’s-up about your backroom dealings.
Again, I’m not trying to unduly harsh your mellow. But your text exchange comes across like a very boring interview, which is doubly remarkable considering how few words you needed to convey such dullness.
Rule #1 for beginners: Don’t ask a girl what she does. First, you don’t give a shit. Second, she knows you don’t give a shit. Instead, try a teasing alternative: “I bet you’re in the [x] business. I can tell by your look.” This is a sort of cold read that chicks love, and will be much better received, leading to more fruitful conversation avenues.
Now that I’ve corrected your most glaring game misstep, I’ll point out that you’re probably on the right track in your belief that rapid number closes without sufficient emotional connection are leaving girls feeling less than enthused about you the next day when the glow of the previous night has worn off. Getting a number, however rushed, is usually better than not getting a number at all, but don’t expect your lay rate to budge upward much from a pile of hastily relinquished phone numbers that the girls probably gave you because you caught them off-guard.
Resolve never again to ask interview-style questions of girls, and make it a personal growth mission to refrain from asking girls for their numbers until you’ve passed certain pickup trail markers, as defined according to your level of comfort, that may include, say, a well-received touch on one of her erogenous zones or a verbal signal she’s into you (did she ask you three questions in a row? that’s one positive indicator of female interest).