This One Weird Trick To Get Over Approach Anxiety

Despite the glib title, this is a serious post.

Men have problems approaching women for makelove and pieceinourtime. Ok, the men from the ice people races, mostly. This is a fact. There are theories why men find it so difficult to cold approach women and chat them up with the goal of bedroom hijinks, some of which might have predictive power. Finding the source of men’s approach anxiety would help motivated and aspiring womanizers figure out plans of attack to overcome the AA psychological hurdle.

(It is plausible that approach anxiety evolved from a reality of the distant EEA past when chatting up a strange woman in your tribe or a neighboring tribe could easily get you killed by her brother, father, lover, or the jealous cavebeta orbiter.)

Most pickup sites recommend immersion therapy: learn to love the crash and burn and the preemptive exit as you small talk your way through hundreds of women in a week’s time.

This is not a horrible strategy compared to the alternative for most men: staring at a cute girl from a distance and later masturbating to the cortically embedded visual of her enticing form. But it suffers from one major drawback. There’s no getting around the perception that you are the pursuer, and she the pursued. Not normally a big deal for more experienced men, but for beginners this heavily biased pre-pickup perception means they face an uphill battle getting girls invested in their spiel. Conversations will wind up being short and curt, and that’s no good for a newbie who needs the face and tongue time to improve his social mechanics.

There’s a better beginner exercise that won’t mentally tax your average frustrated neophyte as much as the immersion strategy does. Do you live in a city with a lot of street hawkers and open air social justice hucksters? You know, Greenpeace granolas, Planned Parenthood slutolas, Black Lives Matter shinolas, constantly soliciting passersby with supremely earnest requests for support and thrusting pamphlets or donation list clipboards at you?

These are the shitlib randos you should approach. They aren’t going anywhere, they won’t reject you, and they are pursuing YOU not the other way around. You should practice your conversational chops on these Merchants of Mewl, especially the cute girls.

It will be much easier to get feedback on your game from them because their instinct to insta-reject you for a clumsy blurt is neutralized by the preexisting social dynamic. Go ahead and neg that Occupy Wombchute girl, tease her, flirt with her. She’s been loitering on that sidewalk corner all day, desperate for a little attention and a little love for her cause. She’ll be more forgiving of your beta bumblings, but she won’t stop being a woman, which means you’ll still get honest feedback from her mannerisms, her smile, her eye gleam, and the direction of her body sway, all of which will betray her arousal, or lack thereof, under the tutelage of your incipiently alpha presence.

An addendum: I would bet 90% of the male readers who are interested in improving their charisma to attract and date cute girls won’t do a damn thing with the knowledge droppage that happens at CH. So, it is with a note of bittersweetness that CH continues to pump out posts like this one. Yet we soldier on. Why? Because 90% isn’t 100%. If someone saved a beta today, it will all be worth it.