We’re back for the 2015 punchable shitlib face semifinals!
Bout 1: Matty “Yce Yce Baby” Yglesias vs Dylan “I’m hiding a buttplug” Matthews
Don’t be surprised if your hand reflexively curls into a fist looking at Yglesias. And multiple viewings which could conceivably inure you to his smug doughboy plushness don’t seem to lessen the urge (more like amplifies it).
“Trouty Mouth“.
2015 Punchable Shitlib Face Tournament Semifinal: Bout 1******
Bout 2: Pajamaboy vs Lindsey Graham
Keep in mind, president buttsecks and his staff thought this milquetoast clad in jammies sipping from a hot mug of cocoa was a good representative to sell their healthcare boondoggle.
“Phew, do you smell that?! Oh, teehee, it was me!” Peter Pan, meet yourself in fifty years.
2015 Punchable Shitlib Face Tournament Semifinal: Bout 2******
Stop the lugenpresses! We have a last-minute punchable shitlib face addition to the cards! He’s a former heavyweight champion of punchability, and a million Buzzfeed fans demanded his inclusion, so the winner of the Yglesias vs Matthews match will advance to a bonus bout against
McKay Coppins.
my hand… curling into a fist……. cannot stop it…….. cannot……. *SWING*……. *CRACK*……….ahhhhhhhhhh
McKay Coppins, for those who really must know the bios of our nation’s listicle artisans, is an ur-shitlib who lies for Buzzfeed. His mug is making the rounds because he was at a recent Trump rally and claimed to have overheard someone yell “Light the motherfucker on fire!” to a protestor; “someone” likely meaning him, a left wing plant. Look at that doughy concave croissant Coppins sports for a face. It’s easy to picture him screeching “light the motherfucker on fire” in a faggy tone with a barely-concealed smirk as he thinks of all the good copy this will generate for his online bathhouse.