Alpha Male Of The Month: Let’s Her And Her (And Her) Fight

Ever play “let’s you and him fight”? If you’re a woman, you probably have at least once in your life. Women love this manipulative gambit because it helps them scale the social ladder and enlist white knight goobers to their faire maiden aid, while allowing plausible deniability that they’re jostling for rank.

But as any upstanding womanizer knows, those same womanly manipulations when targeted against women produce an electric effect on our dear friend Bartholin.

In another fine example of flipping the courtship script, a sexual market shitlord has co-opted the “let’s you and him fight” female imperative and leveraged it to his everlovin’ advantage. Call it the “let’s her and her (and her) fight” strategy, which your gramps might know as the “watching a cat fight from the catbird seat” good time.

MERRY EX-MAS: Man infuriates ex-partners by putting them all into a group chat

ZFG.

That opening line is smooth, player. A wok of jerkboy whimsy seasoned with a dash of vulnerability game. Also, 😆 at that extra spicy ZFG “or a short time bella lol”.

Btw, as you’re reading along try to guess which of Tom’s exes is ready to swoon all over again for his magic man muff puffing. (Tom threw four girls together in this merry ex-mas chat room.)

It doesn’t take long for the cat claws to come out.

Chicks dig a lying, scheming, conniving, jerkboy chauvinist pig. Not exaggerating for effect.

The three remaining girls cat fight some more, and Tom, skillfully waiting for his moment as female tingles gather potential energy, unloads this corker of a neg/disqualification on bella:

Notice as well how perfectly Tom handles Steph’s schoolmarm upbraiding. “I’m fine just wanted to say merry ex-mas to yaz”. Dismissive, un-punctuated, cheeky, and delivered with the insouciance of an amused master of poon. Jumbotron test: PASSED.

Having read this far, any guesses which of the four girls – Lisa, Gemma, Bella, Steph – couldn’t resist Tom’s Harem Lord charms?

Take your time.

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Tha finale, yass:

There is no number, only fuck close or do not fuck close. That “Xx” at the end is as good a guarantee from a girl that Tom’s got the F close wrapped up.

I submit that we enter Tom’s “just wanted to say merry ex-mas to yaz” to the pantheon of infamous alpha male sweet nothings, like “bring the movies”, “nah”, and “seriously tho ur pussy rocks!”

PS There’s a powerful subtext in this devious jerkboy ploy that acts like kryptonite on girls’ diffident coyness. The clue is in Tom’s self-amusing line “LISA DON’T GO LOL” as she’s walking out the virtual door. It’s obvious he doesn’t really give a shit if she goes, and more importantly it’s obvious to the OTHER GIRLS THERE not named Lisa. This is female preselection at its most intoxicating. Three hamsters spun their wheels at once, weaving golden fabric emblazoned with the invocation “Tom is a honey badger. Honey badger don’t give a shit if pussy stays or goes. Honey badger is a man with dating options. I must prove to honey badger I am worth giving a shit for.”

PPS What you’ve viewed is a window to what a post-West de facto alpha male harem looks like. Soft polygamy is not much more forgiving than hard polygamy in its systemic capacity to leave beta males in the incel cold.

PPPS Take the bad words out and change the context a bit and you may as well be reading a transcript of a GOP debate. Tom is Trump. Lisa is Ben Carson. Steph is Jeb. Bella is Megyn Kelly. And Gemma… she’s all of us. Xx