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Chateau Heartiste

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« Our Distant Ape Ancestors Were Polygynous
The Sex Stare »

Cat Ladies And Childlessness: A Love(less) Connection

March 9, 2016 by CH

Stamping the imprimatur of SCIENCE! on what we already knew, this study found that cats and childlessness go together like a horse and carriage.

Quantifying the Search Behaviour of Different Demographics Using Google Correlate.

Vast records of our everyday interests and concerns are being generated by our frequent interactions with the Internet. Here, we investigate how the searches of Google users vary across U.S. states with different birth rates and infant mortality rates. We find that users in states with higher birth rates search for more information about pregnancy, while those in states with lower birth rates search for more information about cats. Similarly, we find that users in states with higher infant mortality rates search for more information about credit, loans and diseases. Our results provide evidence that Internet search data could offer new insight into the concerns of different demographics.

Wait for it……..

😂😂😂

Small useless pets like indoor cats are child substitutes. There’s no flim-flamming away that obvious conclusion under a fog of try-hard White Knight rhetoric. The cat provides the single in the city cock carouseler the outlet for her maternal nurturing instinct (however weak) that a real child of her own can’t, because she hasn’t gotten pregnant in the fifteen years she’s been on the Pill.

There’s been chatter among the alt-cognoscenti about parasites and assorted pathogens secretly being involved in most of humanity’s weird behavioral outliers. News come daily of discoveries that viruses have the creepy ability to alter our personalities. Maybe T gondii, the cat-transmitted pathogen, infects the cat owners’ minds and suppresses their desire to settle down with a dutiful beta male who will help them raise a brood. It might even compel cat ladies to pop womb-charring Pills and seek fleeting hookups with undependable cads. Cat food for thought…

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Posted in Feminist Idiocy, Funny/Lolblogs, Girls, The Big City Life, Ugly Truths | 103 Comments

103 Responses

  1. on March 9, 2016 at 2:28 pm Jager

    My old Bible college professor used to say to us guys and gals (all in our early 20s): “Get married young and have lots of kids.” He was speaking wisdom and good advice.

    LikeLiked by 1 person


    • on March 10, 2016 at 9:17 am Chris

      Twice-born Christian since 1998, and no he wasn’t.

      LikeLike


  2. on March 9, 2016 at 2:29 pm Nikolai Vladivostok

    We should encourage the keeping of cats in overpopulated Third World countries as an underhanded form of birth control. Although, I’ve heard in Nigeria they boil cats alive and eat them.

    LikeLiked by 1 person


    • on March 9, 2016 at 6:29 pm Reb

      Set up a GoFundMe page for Cat Farming in Niger.

      LikeLiked by 1 person


  3. on March 9, 2016 at 2:30 pm judge

    Women who hate children love cats. Cats are.nothing like children. Dogs are like children.

    [CH: very few women actively hate children. cats and small dogs act as child substitutes for women who have immersed themselves in a culture that values secular independence and devalues family formation.]

    LikeLiked by 1 person


    • on March 9, 2016 at 2:37 pm Name Redacted

      No, dogs are surrogate men to these women — protectors and sexually ravenous. EVERY single woman I’ve ever known has had a male dog and there is a reason for that. There is LOTS of sexual tension between these women and their panting, easily excitable male dogs. Maybe someday on this blog we can speak about the unspeakable.

      Cats are like kids because they’re cute and cuddly and take good pictures.

      LikeLiked by 1 person


      • on March 9, 2016 at 3:06 pm Jim Christian

        Taki, or Unz, one of those had a short take by some broad contending chicks with dogs always select males and ALWAYS have something sexual going on with them, one way or the other, one would imagine, oral fixations on their pussies. Beyond gross AND, off putting to me forever more, chicks with dogs. Chicks with cats have never been more than short-term bangs. In any scenario, chicks with cats, ferrets and the like prefer their animals to humans. Chicks that work in Vet’s offices, same, same. They’re short-circuited to humans, with awkward and socially-addled personalities.

        LikeLiked by 1 person


      • on March 9, 2016 at 7:19 pm uh

        Have always been 100% on guard against women with large breeds of dog. I’d go so far as to say we have a natural aversion: we sense we are not quite the same species and no cross-breeding is easily possible. Like women who “love guns” and trucks.

        One time years ago, shortly after discovering this blog in fact, I stumbled on a bestiality video site.

        I’d seen it before, natch — grew up on AOL. But with my eyes now open, I decided to count the number of videos that featured either a man or a woman acting upon, or being acted upon, by an animal.

        Now as anyone here would guess, 9 out of 10 male/animal videos were the man screwing the pooch … so to speak.

        But that ratio is literal, for out of the pages and pages of videos, exactly ten were of men.

        And of course, they were all white to the last. This means that women are orders of magnitude likelier to accept cash payment for being filmed in relations with an animal (mostly dogs, sometimes horse).

        I watched a couple. The women weren’t forced or regretful; most seemed to enjoy it, and many were actually passionate.

        Honestly, one ought to have retired one’s cock after realizing shit like this. At a minimum, younger women with large dogs are using it as a proxy for the familiar males that would have been in her life were she not fallen; and at a very near maximum — has imagined or has received oral sex from the animal.

        At any point on this spectrum, one should bail and find a cat lady. It’s sad and weird in its way, but at least it isn’t SEXUAL TENSION between H. sapiens and C. lupus.

        LikeLike


      • on March 9, 2016 at 9:07 pm hans

        It´s FAR from the first time I heard guys hint to this.
        Though I (thankfully) never witnessed it in person, I take it as the gospel truth by now.
        When the mutt reaches up to her hip and has still balls to swing, my dick is NOT needed there. Even if you´d pay me.
        .. screw ´em ..

        LikeLike


      • on March 9, 2016 at 9:46 pm Old Codger

        Gotta remember there’s good reason female dogs are the origin of the term, “bitches”.

        LikeLike


      • on March 10, 2016 at 12:04 am Ripp

        @JC

        there was an article on ROK not too long ago claiming the same type of thing

        LikeLike


      • on March 10, 2016 at 1:02 am mkkby

        If dogs are surrogate men, then how do you explain all the women who wheel tiny little dogs around in baby carriages? Or dress them up in little sweaters/bandannas.

        No. Some dogs may be for protection, but most city skanks treat them like babies.

        LikeLike


      • on March 10, 2016 at 4:36 am long time lurker

        @mkkby

        “If dogs are surrogate men, then how do you explain all the women who wheel tiny little dogs around in baby carriages?”

        if Dog == surrogate man

        Tiny dog in handbag = surrogate man completely and utterly under the control of the woman. Also, completely and utterly dependent on the woman.

        In short, it’s a surrogate man for a woman who feels threatened by men and doesn’t want to be a fag-hag.

        Discuss…

        LikeLike


      • on March 10, 2016 at 7:23 pm Hugo Stiglitz

        I used to fuck this older chick. She had this toy poodle that would burst into the room while we’re going at it.

        He would be super pissed. The little fucker would grab hold of my arm and start humping it like crazy.

        I learned to close the door.

        LikeLike


    • on March 9, 2016 at 5:16 pm ‘Reality’ Doug

      I see middle ground between judge and CH. Cats are economic dependents in the human world of cat food and veterinarian care and therefore surrogate children to that extent, but cat ladies also effectively had daddy issues. The gubberment was their daddy issue if not also biological dad. Cats are ‘alpha’ in that they act with animal autonomy and capriciousness, and thus with power according to dumb women and their all-knowing instincts. There is a non-child component of respect broads have for cats. No woman can charm a cat into a dutiful beta provider sucker.

      LikeLike


  4. on March 9, 2016 at 2:33 pm Cat Ladies And Childlessness: A Love(less) Connection | Neoreactive

    […] By CH […]

    LikeLike


    • on March 9, 2016 at 8:42 pm The Other Anonymous

      LikeLike


  5. on March 9, 2016 at 2:34 pm Name Redacted

    Great post, but could you do an Open Trump Thread — or something of the sort? I’d like a place we could post things like your observation of the hypocritical JonahNRO on Twitter.

    In my (similar) case, I’m noticing representatives of the Catholic church are calling Trump “vulgar.” They were pretty silent on the vulgarity of priests getting altar boys to suck their dicks, though. We need a repository (heh) for such info.

    LikeLiked by 1 person


  6. on March 9, 2016 at 2:43 pm Wrong Side of History

    Cats are also alpha aloof.

    LikeLiked by 1 person


    • on March 9, 2016 at 6:14 pm Reb

      Until you poke they lazy asshole with a broom handle

      LikeLike


    • on March 10, 2016 at 11:58 am benfromtexas

      Alpha aloof? Definitely. They also are kino masters!

      LikeLike


  7. on March 9, 2016 at 2:47 pm Cat Ladies And Childlessness: A Love(less) Connection – Manosphere.com

    […] Cat Ladies And Childlessness: A Love(less) Connection […]

    LikeLike


  8. on March 9, 2016 at 3:05 pm YIH

    http://4.bp.blogspot.com/__-XZU8KS1Bo/Sc2dpO6YKrI/AAAAAAAAAWs/BBqIWXydOV4/s400/cat+in+highchair.bmp

    LikeLiked by 1 person


  9. on March 9, 2016 at 3:37 pm Laguna Beach Fogey

    Over the last 15 years or so I’ve been seeing a ton of young, pretty White girls around here with little pet dogs. At first I attributed it the influence of chick flicks, but I think it’s more profound than that. As CH says, it’s an outlet for their (unsatisfied) maternal instincts.

    Under the coming Provisional Government of National Restoration (PGNR) government, young women will be banned from pet ownership.

    LikeLiked by 1 person


    • on March 9, 2016 at 6:24 pm Captain Obvious

      > “young women will be banned from pet ownership” ——— Yeah, for the last five years or so, I’ve felt that the New USA must ban pet ownership for any adults between the ages of about 18 to 50. Make babeez, not puppies, nor kittens. Human babeez.

      LikeLiked by 2 people


    • on March 10, 2016 at 9:57 am gumdeo

      Just tell them that 19 is the ideal age to get pregnant. The body’s reproductive and other systems are at their peak.

      LikeLike


      • on March 10, 2016 at 2:08 pm Dude

        They won’t believe you. Most modern women think that 35 is the ideal age to get pregnant. The ones that do get knocked up at that age wind up churning out a deformed alien.

        LikeLike


  10. on March 9, 2016 at 3:59 pm Libertardian

    http://www.breitbart.com/video/2016/03/09/huffpos-grim-54-private-jets-at-meeting-to-stop-trump/

    “Huffington Post reporter Ryan Grim told CNN’s Brooke Baldwin on Tuesday that “something like 54 private jets” had arrived at an elite meeting of tech CEOs, GOP party insiders and big donors set on stopping Donald Trump before he wins the Republican nomination.”

    We are your friendsss

    LikeLiked by 1 person


    • on March 9, 2016 at 4:02 pm Libertardian

      http://www.breitbart.com/big-government/2016/03/09/mark-zuckerberg-tech-leaders-urge-supreme-court-to-open-u-s-labor-market-to-illegals/

      “Facebook CEO Mark Zuckerberg and a coalition of tech and business leaders are joining the administration’s call for the Supreme Court to “unfreeze” President Barack Obama’s 2014 executive-amnesty programs.”

      We come in peassse

      LikeLike


      • on March 9, 2016 at 9:47 pm Canadian Friend

        How liberals think,

        one Trump is one too many

        tens of millions of Mexican invaders is never enough!

        LikeLike


  11. on March 9, 2016 at 4:19 pm Beef Hambone

    Planned Parenthood should start a “free cat with every abortion” special

    LikeLiked by 1 person


    • on March 9, 2016 at 4:29 pm whorefinder

      “Fair Trade Felines for Fetuses!”

      Too dark for whorefinder rape!

      LikeLike


    • on March 9, 2016 at 6:11 pm Reb

      This guy

      LikeLike


    • on March 9, 2016 at 7:36 pm Johnny Redux

      Thread winner, right there.

      LikeLike


  12. on March 9, 2016 at 4:36 pm Ang Aamer

    When I was younger I would evaluate potential girlfriends on the cat scale.

    10 no cat
    9 outside tomcat who only comes by for food and post fight medical attention
    8 one cat inside declawed scared of men
    7 one cat inside, brazen behavior, cat thinks they are human
    6 as in 7 score but has 2 cats
    (deduct a point for each additional cat)

    Once you get 7 and below you have hit the crazy end of the crazy/hot matrix.

    LikeLike


    • on March 9, 2016 at 10:10 pm Lucius Somesuch

      –We should note that outdoor cats are a greater toxiplasma hazard. Also, declawing isn’t like trimming a toenail– it’s an amputation.

      Yes, the cat is a familiar spirit of many a human evil harpy– but let’s not blame the cats. Many are ill-sorted with caretakers who lag well behind in playfulness, springiness, or psychological discernment. They are a sleek and, in their way, exalted species. Not incapable of a kind of loyalty, even. Though Lord knows, an English bulldog takes that to a whole other (fighting) level, and will make a more prudent addition to the household.

      As for the g*dd__n worm, lobotomizing other beings so it can get at some nice warm cat intestines is its own damn fault. Though on prudential grounds I agree with CO, you don’t need cat shit in the home, I pay the feline homage, and wish my sainted old fur-daughter well! NACALT!

      LikeLike


      • on March 9, 2016 at 10:44 pm Philomathean

        I have two nine year old inside cats. There’s a lot of psychological similarity between feline and woman. In truth, they’re great pets–both cat and girl..

        LikeLike


      • on March 10, 2016 at 1:10 am bo jangles

        You don’t get toxoplasmosis from cats, you get it from undercooked or underfrozen meat. If you look at people who handle cats everyday, all day, they have normal population infection rates.

        LikeLike


      • on March 10, 2016 at 9:57 am Lucius Somesuch

        “You don’t get toxoplasmosis from cats, you get it from undercooked or underfrozen meat.”

        Well, undercooked lamb is presumably the reason infection rates are so high in swaths of Europe. But pregnant women should not be cleaning litter boxes because transmission to the embryo’s brain will result in retardation. That, at any rate, is a standard warning.

        Now, nobody’s assuming that ladies are eating the cat shit, or scooping it out by their bare hands, so the means of transmission must be a little more flexible than that.

        Of course I’d love to think it’s really a minimal, practically non-existent risk: but why then bother to enjoin pregnant women not to clean the littler box?

        And if it destroys a baby-in-the-womb’s brain, what might it be doing to the adult population?

        LikeLike


  13. on March 9, 2016 at 4:43 pm Sean Fielding

    For quite awhile, T. gondii has been the organism of greatest interest in Greg Cochran’s infection hypothesis of homosexuality.

    LikeLike


    • on March 9, 2016 at 9:49 pm Canadian Friend

      One day someone will discover what organism infects the brains of white liberals and makes them want to give their civilization away to savage invaders.

      LikeLike


    • on March 10, 2016 at 1:18 am bo jangles

      it definitely fucks with hormones, but its likely more responsible for borderline/narcissism schizo tendencies. Toxo infected mice are 75% more likely to reproduce. Brazil and France have one of the highest rates or toxo infection, and have similar narcissistic, sexual tendencies. Its credible that toxo is a significant influence. For people who have never heard of toxo, it is the most common parasite that generally infects 20-80 percent of the population of EVERY country. Amazing you hear almost nothing about it in the news. Even diverse animals are infected. I was amazed that the only animal I could find that had an almost zero infection rate was some tree dwelling, fruit eating monkeys(no association with eating meat or being near the ground).

      LikeLike


  14. on March 9, 2016 at 4:56 pm cynthia

    For some women, cats (or pitbulls) are children who won’t inconvenience you with their own needs/wants/desires, while still offering you all their love and attention. At least, that’s what most women seem to think about pets. Furry little emotional support robots. Seems to be what happens if you don’t grow up with them, and get your first one in your twenties.

    LikeLike


    • on March 9, 2016 at 5:15 pm Nads

      Pit bulls?

      Not a low maintenance breed. And one prone to drag a 120 pound owner’s ads all over the place when out on a walk.

      I do know that lesbians seem to prefer boxers.

      LikeLike


      • on March 9, 2016 at 5:18 pm whorefinder

        Pitbulls are adopted by the same kind of SWPL chicks (and neckbeards) who sign up to be teachers at inner-city high schools right out of college.

        They soon burn out and learn that stereotypes exist for a reason….

        Dog breeds are races rape!

        LikeLike


      • on March 9, 2016 at 9:26 pm cynthia

        Pitbulls are definitely a dog best suited for experienced dog owners willing/able to take a firm dominate role in the animal’s life. Sadly, this does not describe most pitbull owners. I feel bad for dogs in such situations.

        LikeLike


      • on March 10, 2016 at 4:32 am StAugustine

        @whorefinder the french word for breed *is* race.

        LikeLike


    • on March 9, 2016 at 7:32 pm Johnny Redux

      Always found it interesting how some woman are shocked at the idea of having 2, 3 or more children, but have the time and energy to take care of 3-4 dogs, and a couple of cats – all of which are permanent helpless children until the day they die. Unnatural twats, is what they are.

      LikeLike


      • on March 10, 2016 at 7:41 am wolfie65

        Around here, everyone and their cousin has at least 1 Chihuahua or some Chihuahua mix.
        Pitbulls are also popular, especially among the ghetto thugs.
        There’s a strong tradition here to use dogs as a from of disposable alarm systems.

        LikeLike


    • on March 9, 2016 at 9:51 pm Canadian Friend

      They even call them fur babies

      that says it all.

      those women should be having white babies.

      LikeLike


  15. on March 9, 2016 at 5:12 pm Nads

    Because, you know, stereotypes have no basis in fact, right?

    Can I get a second on that Schlomo?

    How about about you, padre?

    LikeLike


  16. on March 9, 2016 at 5:13 pm The Tingler

    None of the cat ladies I’ve ever known were cock carouselers. They were mostly neurotics who never got dates when they were younger to begin with.

    Then again, I don’t live in a shiny blue coastal city, where I imagine the cock carousel/cat ladies are more numerous.

    LikeLike


    • on March 9, 2016 at 8:29 pm FB (Former Beta)

      I live in the Boston area: there is a a strong connection here between the cock carousel, the cat and the slovenly apartment…single women between the ages of 20-45 all seem to fit this profile here. Sad.

      LikeLike


    • on March 9, 2016 at 10:49 pm Philomathean

      Young women on birth control who own more than one cat are whores. It’s an indicator of sluttitude second only to tattoos.

      LikeLike


  17. on March 9, 2016 at 5:28 pm tteclod

    This is the quote that caught my attention.

    “Similarly, we find that users in states with higher infant mortality rates search for more information about credit, loans and diseases.”

    Inadequate capitalization and poor health correlates with infant mortality.

    Any (hypergamous) woman with half a brain will select for resources and health.

    Think on it: 80/40 seems about right. That’s chucking about 20 percent of the population – male AND female – at the outset, then thinning the remaining men by half, probably not by violence so much as by competence.

    What does that mean, practically? If you can count yourself among the top 50% of men, your reproductive odds are pretty good.

    The largest modern impact isn’t upon male reproductive success, but upon female reproductive success. In the USA, the childlessness rate among women aged 15-44 is over 45%!!!!!!!!!

    Let that sink in a bit. We’ve gone from a pre-history rate of 80% gene transmission for women to what may be effectively less than 50% with losses in succeeding generations.

    Discuss that.

    LikeLike


  18. on March 9, 2016 at 5:41 pm Damn Crackers

    Has anyone asked if single women for T. gondii are the vector to infect cats and not the other way around?

    LikeLike


  19. on March 9, 2016 at 6:07 pm WillBest

    Another reason why I tell people that say “We can’t deport 12 million invaders” not to hurt themselves. Google could tell you who the invaders are with 98% certainty. And we would probably be grateful to get rid of the other 2% anyway.

    LikeLike


    • on March 9, 2016 at 9:54 pm Canadian Friend

      Good point,

      but the 12 million figure is outdated

      I think the media and the left have been using that number for over 10 years now

      The real number must be at least 20 million

      LikeLike


  20. on March 9, 2016 at 7:23 pm Cat Ladies And Childlessness: A Love(less) Connection | Reaction Times

    […] Source: Heartiste […]

    LikeLike


  21. on March 9, 2016 at 7:27 pm Johnny Redux

    This story: The reason to avoid any woman shopping in the pet food isle at the grocery store. That’s already red flag #1, before you even say hello.

    LikeLike


    • on March 9, 2016 at 8:19 pm Captain Obvious

      It’s amazing the shiznat which you can tell just by glancing in a chick’s shopping cart. Jug wine – alc0holic. Diet drinks & diet bars – pudgy pretending to herself that she’s losing weight. Cat food – cat lady. Too much hip & trendy shiznat – high maintenance high dollar beeyotch. On the flip side, if you see something interesting in a chick’s cart, then it’s a great conversation starter.

      LikeLike


      • on March 9, 2016 at 8:38 pm Vincent

        Why are you knocking jug wine? It is for the economical shopper…

        LikeLike


      • on March 9, 2016 at 8:44 pm uh

        On Saturday or Sunday, watch for yogurt, berries, vitamin water, or anything that betokens “energy” or “healthy”, i.e. post-hangover compensation.

        Mine was always a Sprite, followed by a breakfast of corned beef hash & eggs, and three cups of black coffee.

        LikeLike


      • on March 9, 2016 at 9:56 pm Canadian Friend

        If there is something interesting in the cart she is probably already taken

        LikeLike


      • on March 10, 2016 at 4:28 am Suburban_elk

        Seasoned alcoholics stick to vodka and beer – women can’t even get that right!

        LikeLike


  22. on March 9, 2016 at 7:39 pm Amasius

    I’ve got the Univision Hillary/Bernie debate on in the background and I just want to say this: Holy shit the Hispanics are tribal. They see absolutely everything through the lens of immigration, ethnicity, and the Spanish language. They’re like another Ummah. How can White Americans be so oblivious? These people belong to an entirely different cultural group and they’re REPLACING YOU. Wake the fuck up, seriously!

    LikeLike


    • on March 9, 2016 at 7:57 pm uh

      I flicked past it. You see the pathetic little Mayan woman stuttering on cue about “tengo gran dolor”?

      We’re way beyond fucked.

      LikeLike


      • on March 9, 2016 at 8:09 pm Amasius

        I’m like, hey little gremlin woman: Go the fuck home baby! Be united with your family down there! I guess the welfare feels better than family.

        LikeLiked by 1 person


      • on March 9, 2016 at 8:13 pm Amasius

        Oh, I made a mistake, she smuggled the kids in successfully, FIVE of them. It’s just poor hubby who got left in the lurch somehow. I’m so broken up for the lawbreaking alien welfare leeches.

        LikeLike


      • on March 9, 2016 at 8:37 pm uh

        LOL. Five of them. And of course they have a short reproductive turnaround, so we can expect at least five more, though spread between them, at best. Multiply this by thousands and there you have it: the unassailable math of our replacement.

        LikeLike


    • on March 9, 2016 at 8:13 pm Vincent

      True, but they ain’t black, so there’s that.

      LikeLike


      • on March 9, 2016 at 8:25 pm Barry

        Aside….great day game venues….museums. Never fail.

        [CH: i’ve picked up many a darling at the museum.]

        LikeLike


      • on March 10, 2016 at 8:52 pm Barry

        At the Visionary Museum in Baltimore with a girl on a date but talking to another girl there by herself and she says ‘I feel like we should exchange numbers’ . Got IOIs..from a hot girl there again by herself. Also saw two gorgeous well dressed feminine girls who were out looking. The only drawback is these girls tend to be liberal hippy type but they are surrounded by tofu and crave meat.

        LikeLike


    • on March 9, 2016 at 9:28 pm cynthia

      We’re not blind to it. I think the clannishness makes a lot of white people uncomfortable. But what options do we have to take care of the situation?

      LikeLike


      • on March 9, 2016 at 10:12 pm Amasius

        Vote Trump and hope for the best.

        LikeLike


      • on March 9, 2016 at 10:14 pm Lucius Somesuch

        Elect Trump. Build the Wall. Abolish birthright citizenship. Deport, e-verify, tariffs, push the Overton Window, stop; assigning shit Latina poetry in class, tell Hispanics they’re boring and dull and unwanted, and their village misses them.

        –I know you were being rhetorical, but I just felt like saying it. We can do this! Make America White Again!

        LikeLike


      • on March 9, 2016 at 10:31 pm hans

        You might be clueless but your dear government isn´t..

        LikeLiked by 1 person


    • on March 9, 2016 at 9:32 pm hans

      Could be worse.
      Be me, live in Germany and all you´re allowed for self-defense are your FUCKING kitchen knives!

      But don´t defend yourself TOO hard or YOU´LL end up in jail for longer than the Orks attacking you.

      LikeLike


      • on March 10, 2016 at 6:20 am wolfie65

        Surely you have a bicycle – what’s a European without a bicycle ?
        Means you have a bike lock – preferable the nice, sturdy U-lock variety – and a perfectly legitimate reason for having one.
        A spare chain (“It’s an emergency replacement, officer.”) might also come in handy.
        Then, there are things like (larger, bandana-style) handkerchiefs or scarves, which make pretty good slingshots.
        Things get way more complicated if you also have to defend the wife/gf/daughter.
        If she isn’t helping – or already fucking Abdullah – I suggest a tour of some consulates (US, Canada, Australia, to name a few) to find out about immigration procedures.

        LikeLike


      • on March 10, 2016 at 10:45 am hans

        Not running anywhere.
        This is MY home and everywhere else I´M the fucking refugee and will be treated accordingly.
        Especially after my precious € run out and/or the Eskimo pyramid scheme called global monetary system finally breaks down.
        These days I´m simply not leaving the house without my (illegal of course) flip knife and a high-powered tactical flashlight for the other hand.

        LikeLike


    • on March 9, 2016 at 10:00 pm Canadian Friend

      …They see absolutely everything through the lens of immigration, ethnicity, and the Spanish language…

      All races do that.

      Only the white race does not, at least not anymore.

      And we know which race is fast dying and being replaced.

      yes it is definitely time for white man to f*ck’n wake up.

      LikeLike


      • on March 10, 2016 at 6:05 am wolfie65

        Your average 30-minute newscast on Telemundo, Univision, LA TV or similar consists of about 15 minutes immigration, 10 minutes celebrity gossip and 5 minutes of soccer.
        The newsbabes are way hotter than most of ours, though.

        LikeLike


  23. on March 9, 2016 at 8:33 pm CBR600RR_Rider

    The real question is this: What came first? Childlessness or the cats?
    .
    .
    .

    LikeLike


  24. on March 9, 2016 at 8:35 pm diamondjimwrites

    “Small useless pets like indoor cats are child substitutes.”

    Dude, you have no idea. Had some childless forever neighbors with two cats. They called them their kids. The chick told me one day about how she called a pet psychic and how cool it was that pet psychics could work over the phone these days instead of having to drag your pet to their “office”.

    People are fucking nuts.

    LikeLike


  25. on March 9, 2016 at 10:19 pm Canadian Friend

    When a woman is too fat or ugly to find a mate, she turns to cat

    when a man is too fat or ugly to find a mate, he does something useful like invent the internet or the light bulb or something

    LikeLike


    • on March 10, 2016 at 9:11 am tteclod

      When a woman won’t find a man, she turns to a dog.

      LikeLike


      • on March 10, 2016 at 11:15 am Wrong Side of History

        Dogs are needy, outwardly emotional and stupid. Dogs are a replacement for children.

        Cats are alpha and aloof. They’re in their affection. Cats are substitute for a man.

        Every childless couple I’ve ever known – the woman wanted a puppy.

        LikeLike


      • on March 10, 2016 at 12:27 pm tteclod

        Childless *couple*.

        My sister-in-law and her husband have cats, and that’s generally what I’ve observed, but I suspect you and I are both operating on anecdotes for evidence. My grandmother, after her divorce from my grandfather, couldn’t bear to drown kittens at the farm, so she eventually had about two dozen cats at any given year. When she fed them less, she had fewer. When she died and my parents moved to the farm, the cats eventually dwindled to nothing because my parents travel a lot and the cats didn’t fare well unfed.

        There are lessons in those anecdotes, I think, that can be extrapolated to the single ladies. Busy, social women who aren’t often at home can’t keep pets. Women with no social obligations that keep them away from home for long stretches may have pets. Married (or widowed) mothers with children – even adult children – are more likely of the latter variety.

        LikeLike


      • on March 10, 2016 at 11:15 am Wrong Side of History

        *reserved in their affection

        LikeLike


  26. on March 9, 2016 at 11:46 pm Thick_Biscuit

    The toxoplasmosis=catpsychosis buzz was based on theoretical extrapolations of data about the way the parasite behaved in animals, which caused a bunch of people to jump the gun and apply that to humans with an undeserved air of certainty. The mental illness hypothesis been pretty well debunked more recently. http://qz.com/622816/turns-out-its-probably-not-your-cat-thats-making-you-crazy/

    Also, most pets are “useless” in the sense of not having any immediate labor function for humans–the average pet owner isn’t using their pet for hunting, pulling farm equipment, or guarding their house. But that’s because the purpose they serve provides the less tangible but no less meaningful benefits of companionship, amusement, and responsibility. The problems with cat ladies have nothing to do with cats themselves and everything to do with the fact their these women are using these animals as accessories to and unhealthy substitutes for changing their maladaptive lifestyles.
    It has always seemed to me, though, that cat/dog ownership can he either masculine or feminine based on owner’s personal reasons for choosing that animal.
    For women, a cat could be like a substitute for a man due to its independence, or a more low-maintenance substitute for a child. Or she might choose a dog because of its abundance childlike neediness, or due to the imposing, dominant presence of a male dog.
    On the other hand, some of the most masculine men I have known have been cat-owners, because they’d prefer to have a pet that can take care of itself while they focus on their own ambitious pursuits rather than a dog that needs all the aforementioned babying. Still other men might just prefer to have a more aggressive dog to practice constant dominance over rather than interact with in a female, nurturing way.
    In any case, the “usefulness” of any pet is a function of its owner’s psychological make-up.

    LikeLiked by 2 people


    • on March 10, 2016 at 7:32 am Tick Tock

      http://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC2526142/

      No extrapolation here. And the level of infection/antibody titre may play a role, as well.

      LikeLike


  27. on March 10, 2016 at 12:36 am North Star

    In NYC and Portland/Seattle/SF libtopias I meet far more single girls with small dogs than cats. I think the cat stereotype is a generation old now. The small dog is the new child substitute.

    LikeLike


  28. on March 10, 2016 at 1:01 am bo jangles

    There is one worse aspect about animals, and that is that they are a captive audience. Women who have issues with abandonment always have pets that they will treat better than their own children because deep down they fear having children, because they have the option of leaving. Twisted.

    LikeLike


  29. on March 10, 2016 at 4:42 am Suburban_elk

    A dog owner can be evaluated pass fail very easily. While walking the dog, is the owner leading or is the dog?

    If the two are side by side that is a pass. If the dog is leading it is a fail.

    That is dog ownership 101, and it is amazing how many ladies don’t even get there. Of those i see around here, maybe one in four leads her dog.

    Somewhat topically, there is a good book, contemporary fiction by an English Author, McEwan, called Black Dogs. In the story the black dogs in question were a rottweiler mix trained by the evil Nazis and they got loose in the French countryside after the war and implant themselves in the lifestory memory of a spergy English gentleman communist and his hot wife.

    LikeLike


  30. on March 10, 2016 at 5:49 am Canadian Friend

    I see that each and every comment where I used the word wh*te is awaiting moderation.

    bizarre…

    LikeLike


  31. on March 10, 2016 at 6:35 am Experienced Father

    CH,

    We knew this.

    Now we can pound the femnazi types with the science of the dark cat-shiv.

    LikeLike


  32. on March 10, 2016 at 7:03 am wolfie65

    Far as I’m concerned, the darkest day in the history of the world was when some monkey climbed down from his tree, tried to walk upright and liked it.
    I’ll take animals over people ANY day, exceptions might be made for very hot chicks.
    Can’t recall ever meeting an *attractive* woman who had more than 1 cat, if any, the cat collectors tend to be in the 5-or-below range.
    There are some attractive girls who’re into horses, but you need to be either in a rural or a country club type environment for that.

    LikeLike


    • on March 10, 2016 at 9:58 am oink

      wolfie, sugar

      so many way to be happy, and you spout such nonsense. in the Chateau, no less!

      I am dissapoint

      LikeLike


    • on March 10, 2016 at 11:16 am Suburban_elk

      That monkey probably got kicked out of the tree for complaining about the hypergamous habits of his troupe.

      LikeLike


  33. on March 10, 2016 at 7:25 am Tick Tock

    Toxoplasma gondii infection actually DOES ifnfluence human behavior…and differently so im males and females of our species! It has just been only an (in evolutionary sense) insignificantly short period of time, where we DON’T pose as a viable option as a big cat predator’s next meal…so being zombified to a degree, to provide ourselves as a secondary host, in order to maintain continuation of parasite’s life cycle, makes sense…

    See: http://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC2526142/

    LikeLike


  34. on March 10, 2016 at 10:54 am private joker

    and then there are cat men:

    http://tomgpalmer.com/2010/08/08/my-best-friend-is-gone-wolly-palmer-has-died-and-is-mourned-and-loved/

    LikeLike


  35. on March 10, 2016 at 4:50 pm Jax

    I’ve noticed the explosion in dog ladies and I think the cat lady of the future is going to be the dog lady. I think it is also a testament to the masculinization of women in modern society. Women becoming more like men, are now dumping those feminine felines (also hoping to ditch the cat lady moniker), and reaching for a more masculine companion, Buddy the retriever, in hopes of filling the emotional void. Also, those dogs, are almost always pussies.

    LikeLike


    • on March 10, 2016 at 8:33 pm hans

      Ya think?
      I have never met a woman who could properly own a dog.
      The fucking mutt ALWAYS was the leader in that “household” and did what it wanted.

      Especially bad when the stupid broad decides to get a dog that can easily overpower her.
      Almost comical to watch them get dragged behind on their evening walks, if that fucking monster wasn´t taking a beeline right towards ME.

      LikeLike



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