Office Game

We don’t write about Office Game as much as we could, given the sheer beta-hours spent by so many aspiring womanizers in office spaces, but the fact is that the business and culture environments have changed to make it a lot more difficult to flirt with (let alone pick up) girls at work, if you aren’t the boss. It’s still good policy to not shit where you eat/don’t dip your pen in the company ink. But there remain sufficiently deniable and fun ways to flirt with cutie coworkers that will sail under the radar of HR ballcutters.

Reader archerwfisher reminds us how to liven up the cubicle farm by porting over an idea he read at this blog:

Off topic, but toyed with a game tactic I read on here and loved the result. Remember reading about little kid game?

Cute white girl coworker at work, sits at the cube across the aisle from me. We’ve talked a little and she seemed flirty, or maybe she’s just a flirt. Towards the end of the day she started yawning loudly now and then.

What did I do? Shoot rubber bands at her after each yawn, of course. So mature, a 25 year old shooting rubber bands at a 22 year old. She absolutely loved it, like a cat chasing a ball. She’d yawn then turn around and look at me, grinning, waiting for me to shoot a rubberband at her.

Read the Chateau, apply it to your life… live better.

That’s good stuff. Chicks dig the slow tease and saucy taunt. Teasing displays a man’s ZFG attitude and preselected prowess; men who care too much what women think of them won’t tease women. They’d be too frightened to even entertain the thought.

But act now, because freedom-to-flirt supplies won’t last. We’re nearing the day (if we haven’t already passed it) when flirtatiously shooting rubber bands at a girl in the adjacent soylent pod will get a man fired or tossed in jail for perpetuating the patriarchy and creating a hostile work environment (btw, don’t trannies advocating all-access shitters create a hostile bathroom environment?). Like I’ve said, the goal of Pozmerica is to liberate female sexuality from all constraints while maximally restricting male sexuality. It used to be all a man on the prowl had to worry about was rejection; now he has to evade state authorities, too. Which, come to think of it, if he successfully evades, his SMV shoots through the roof.

The alpha male bosses love the new rules of engagement that basically criminalize office flirtation, because it cuts off at the knees any competition from savvy, upstart beta males making a run at the hot secretaries the bosses really hired as options on future sexual trysts. Reality-warping and beta-stomping feminism needed a powerful ally, and it found that ally in the 1%er alpha male ovaguards.