MAGA Game Challenge Field Report

Reader cobrantula accepted the CH MAGA Game Challenge. He writes about his experience.

A few posts ago you bad asses suggested a man go out wearing a MAGA hat and tell ya’ll what happened. So here ya go.

I live in Baltimore and usually hang out in the artsy, SJW area known as [REDACTED]. I will tell you where I went, but ask that you don’t make that public knowledge beyond saying an artsy neighborhood in Baltimore.

First I went to the [REDACTED] which is on the first floor of the [REDACTED]. I sat at the bar next to two SJW chicks. It didn’t take long for them to open me. They were challenging. “How can you wear that hat in Baltimore?” I went with an answer I stole from Wild at Heart.

“‘Cause it’s a symbol of my individuality and it represents my belief in personal freedom.”

They started trying to argue and that’s when I remembered the teachings of the Chateau. I just grinned and tried to have amused mastery. I don’t remember any of what I said, but I just remember my attitude and soon enough they were laughing with me and calmed down.

Unfortunately I ran out of steam. After a lull in conversation I asked for the number of the one closest to me and she refused. I stole a line from Sam Kinison. I said, “Good luck with your compromise,” and I left.

Next bar was the [REDACTED], another SJW haven. I got many looks of hate/ disgust, but no one really fucked with me. One Indian girl started chatting me up enthusiastically, but all of a sudden about three minutes in she just up and left.

The last bar I went to was the [REDACTED]. This bar I would consider the SJW belly of the beast. I sat and waited and sure enough the two girls next to me opened me with disgust and curiosity. But just as it was about to get good the Bouncer rushed over and shouted, “Do not talk to them!”

I tried to argue that they were talking to me, not realizing that I wasn’t gonna be able to logic my way out of this. At the time I thought the smartest option was just to open some other girls rather than get thrown out of the bar. So I moved.

It’s a good strategy to make friendos with bouncerbros at establishments you frequent, for exactly this reason.

Ordering a drink the cute bartender asked me about the hat. For the second time the Bouncer rushed over and this time said, “This guy’s a troll don’t feed the trolls.”

Then again, some bouncers are dicksucking phaggot white knights who voted for thecunt.

I left soon after and went to [REDACTED] where reactions were much warmer. In the end I got drunk and my game fell apart, but it was a fun experiment all in all.

Next day I walked around Georgetown wearing it. So many girls did double takes. A lot of them gave me looks of disgust.

Remember, in women disgust is one emo-oscillation away from a full blown vagina tingle. It’s true, SCIENCE! says so in this study which used plethysmograph measurements to discover that women are involuntarily turned on by a lot of weird and disgusting stuff:

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The genitals of the volunteers were connected to plethysmographs — for the men, an apparatus that fits over the penis and gauges its swelling; for the women, a little plastic probe that sits in the vagina and, by bouncing light off the vaginal walls, measures genital blood flow. An engorgement of blood spurs a lubricating process called vaginal transudation: the seeping of moisture through the walls. The participants were also given a keypad so that they could rate how aroused they felt.

The men, on average, responded genitally in what Chivers terms “category specific” ways. Males who identified themselves as straight swelled while gazing at heterosexual or lesbian sex and while watching the masturbating and exercising women. They were mostly unmoved when the screen displayed only men. Gay males were aroused in the opposite categorical pattern. Any expectation that the animal sex would speak to something primitive within the men seemed to be mistaken; neither straights nor gays were stirred by the bonobos. And for the male participants, the subjective ratings on the keypad matched the readings of the plethysmograph. The men’s minds and genitals were in agreement.

All was different with the women. No matter what their self-proclaimed sexual orientation, they showed, on the whole, strong and swift genital arousal when the screen offered men with men, women with women and women with men. They responded objectively much more to the exercising woman than to the strolling man, and their blood flow rose quickly — and markedly, though to a lesser degree than during all the human scenes except the footage of the ambling, strapping man — as they watched the apes. And with the women, especially the straight women, mind and genitals seemed scarcely to belong to the same person. The readings from the plethysmograph and the keypad weren’t in much accord. During shots of lesbian coupling, heterosexual women reported less excitement than their vaginas indicated; watching gay men, they reported a great deal less; and viewing heterosexual intercourse, they reported much more. Among the lesbian volunteers, the two readings converged when women appeared on the screen. But when the films featured only men, the lesbians reported less engagement than the plethysmograph recorded. Whether straight or gay, the women claimed almost no arousal whatsoever while staring at the bonobos.

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The CH ür-Maxim: Watch what women do, don’t listen to what women say.

I yadstopped one girl and she was all butthurt about the hat, but she stayed in set. Turns out she’s engaged so it didn’t go anywhere.

“Engaged” but “stayed in set”. Just when you think you’ve got marriage material on your hands.

Best part of the day:

A homeless veteran stopped me and said, “America was already great. He just made it greater.”

He showed me a picture of him and his infant son. He was wearing a MAGA hat in the pic.

God Bless Trump, America, and the Chateau.

Cobrantula

Good stuff. I would say the reactions were what I’d expect in a deepest blue shitcity like Baltimore, but despite that there were women willing to indulge their curiosity with MAGA MAN. The bigger obstacle appears to be pissed off Trump-hating males like the bouncer in this sociological experiment. If you can neutralize the bitterbitch males, the women’s objections should be easier to surMOUNT. (White knights are like mobile border walls “protecting” women from sexy interloper womanizers.)

Any others willing to accept the MAGA Game Challenge?