Ah, Cigstache. Old timers at the Chateau will not-so-fondly recall her as the representative “zero” on the 1-to-10 female beauty scale.
Well, it’s time to meet your new Cigstache. Say hello (through your plumes of puke) to Tacotoad:
I get a thrill from torturing the retinas of my readers. It’s not like some of you don’t deserve it.
***
Let’s make this more interesting. Which woman would you prefer to have for extremely platonic lunch company?
I can tell you I’d choose Cigstache, no hesitation. She looks earthy, like she has some good stories to tell, and I bet she’s not a man-hating femcunt. Tacotoad….or should I write (((Tacotoad)))…likely has a distinctly caustic personality belied by her inbred mutant physiognomy. So with Tacotoad, your ears are gonna hurt as bad as your eyes.
She has two sisters as well:
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On our left [her right hand], it definitely looks like “TACO”.
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But what about our right [her left hand]? “TIME”? “TITS”?
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What’s the left appendage read? Toad?
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Time Time, perhaps?
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Damn, I meant Taco Time
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I think it’s either “TACO TIME” or “TACO TITS”.
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It is not unknown for women in Australia of the Cigstache type to have Tooheys and Reschs (types of on-tap beer) tattooed above their nipples.
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[…] Meet The New Cigstache […]
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Now, now. “Beauty comes in all sizes!”
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No.
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Cigstache because she wouldn’t bitch about smoking.
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while still repulsive that looks like a very slight upgrade compared to cis and taco
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Chokin’ on a chipmunk:
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(((They))) must be laughing their asses off, behind closed doors, at the utter freakshow that has been created (spawned??).
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I just knew Captain Obvious would try to top it.
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(((Taco Toad))), of course…
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I get a thrill from torturing the retinas of my readers.
yeah CH you and Captain Obvious seem to have that sadist side
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I get a thrill from torturing the retinas of my readers. It’s not like some of you don’t deserve it.
Honorable mention. I think this might actually surpass the Swedish cartoon sodomy pamphlet.
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Cigstache could be a 80’s era WWF wrestler…The One Woman Gang..
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The ancient Greeks had a myth that describes the entities above (from Wikipedia), GORGON:
In Greek mythology, a Gorgon (/ˈɡɔːrɡən/; plural: Gorgons, Ancient Greek:Γοργών/Γοργώ Gorgon/Gorgo) is a female creature. The name derives from the ancient Greek word gorgós, which means “dreadful”, and appears to come from the same root as the Sanskrit word “garğ” which is defined as a guttural sound, similar to the growling of a beast,[1] thus possibly originating as anonomatopoeia. While descriptions of Gorgons vary across Greek literature and occur in the earliest examples of Greek literature, the term commonly refers to any of three sisters who had hair made of living, venomous snakes, as well as a horrifying visage that turned those who beheld her to stone. Traditionally, while two of the Gorgons were immortal, Stheno and Euryale, their sister Medusa was not, and she was slain by the demigod and hero Perseus.
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yeah I figured they had female supremacist (feminist) back then as well
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A fat millenial cat lover just joined my company. Though only in her 20s, she can’t stand for long. She props up her Vienna sausage shaped legs on a trash can, presumably to stir blood flow to the ham hocks. I’ve taken to walking the long away around my office back to my desk so I don’t have to look at the horror
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She’ll be sponsoring the new Code of Conduct within a few months.
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my gf has a twitter she follows, some fat cow saying we need a fat disney princess NOWWWWWWWWWWWWWWW or some shit…haven’t bothered to look because I’m already nauseous from CH’s pics
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-The importance of taking a stand against fat…
The blonde in this photo
5’8″ and 132#, comtemplated legal action against Hooters for being told she didn’t fit well in her uniform, and was offered a free 60 day gym membership to shape up or ship out.
Is she “fat”? You decide. But praise be unto Hooters for insisting on standards and holding the line on (fat) incrementalism.
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The blonde probably didn’t get the job because her, well, hooters are too small.
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I don’t know about their standards on fat, but it seems Hooters standards on… well, hooters… have declined somewhat.
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The cow demanding Disney make her princess fantasy less laughable is fat, but nothing as hideous Taco Toad, though they probably share a mindset, or even a spine.
Though only in her 20s, she can’t stand for long.
“Healthcare is a right!” because:
https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC1853041/
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No Trigglypuff?
http://gph.is/1SLH8jj
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This fat Jew literally has the brain of an infant. That is exactly how an infant throws a tantrum — the arm movements.
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We need a click bait “you’ll never believe what she looks like now” for the women of the original Cigstache post. Frances McDormand cannot have gone down too much.
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I witnessed in the military first-hand that black guys would f*ck anything, no matter how grotesque. But, I now doubt that after seeing cigstache. They would definitely bang taco girl though.
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I don’t think blacks look at the face of the pussy they are banging. And they don’t hang around afterwards to cuddle.
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Black motto: “It’s all pink on the inside.”
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Considering the amount of ‘heterosexual’ blacks who get HIV, no it isn’t
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Just finished reading “Inventing the AIDS Virus”
MPC are bang on calling it ‘GRIDS’
TL;DR – amyl nitrite and drug abuse destroys immune system, causes cancer. Symptoms of AZT includes: immune defiency,
If Africa has an AIDS epidemic why has the population tripled?
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Sometimes it’s purple.
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For Whites, it’s all about whom you’re fucking. For blacks, it’s all about the fuck.
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They are DTF anything with a hole, seriously.
over in modern africa, they’re all about the farm animals and eating the menstruation of these things for voodoo or wtfever. I guess they don’t do that in the cities anymore…probably because there aren’t any cows around or something…
How you think HIV really jumped to humans, it was ingestion of contaminated meat? LOL. That was always the narrative, wasn’t it? Nobody wants to say it, but food through the GI tract isn’t an HIV vector. I’ll let you guess what is…and no they weren’t sharing needles with a monkey.
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@trav777, not in Africa, but to your larger point — check out the female orangutan(s) in Borneo that are dressed up and used as prostitutes.
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Consider well, that which you’d penetrate…
… Mother Nature has ways of dissuading men of their follies.
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jvo – no thanks. I will pass. To each his own, but I draw the line way before orangutan porn.
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this post and comment section should have been called “How to keep from having an erection”
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She’ll be sponsoring the new Code of Conduct within a few months.
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Baal save me
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Careful what you wish for, boyo.
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Start cutting yourself, maybe he’s taking a crap.
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Get rid of the pigtails and she looks like some of the butch women I see.
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Now you owe us another vintage babes post.
[CH: good news. stay tuned.]
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Men in hope..
(actual name of this Czech flic)
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There we go..
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at least cigstache wore a girly shirt with butterflies. What do trigglypuff and the new zero wear but anti-feminine shit.
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The messed up thing would be if somehow this post overtook the “how to get a girl to send you nudes” post.
We’ll be way beyond poolside should that be the case.
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No.
We’d be lost if the posts were merged into: “how to get the cigstache to send nude pics…”
It would then be: “game over (European) man! Game over!”
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Taco the Hutt!
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Blech…. why do you hate us CH???
Stay strong brothers…
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Ahh, a poon sorbet. Thank you!
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Looking through those old issues of National Lampoon I have concluded women in the 70s and 80s were hotter. Nearly all of them are as beautiful and elegant as this woman is.
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we were definitely a whiter culture then…
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An oasis! Thank you!
And may I also suggest:
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Is that Bree Turner?
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Nope. Christen something or the other.
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As disgusting and informative (feminist hair-colors are called animal warning colors for a reason) those pics are, this ..
is still the most creepy chick I´ve ever seen.
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She looks like Grendal biting off that guy’s head in “Beowulf” (2007).
Can’t be unseen.
http://tinyurl.com/yaksgdea
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What the hell is that?
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whoa…when you see it. That neck…
I was all like nice lean girl in red dress eating a sammich and WHAT TEHFCUKS
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Ain’t you yeggs ever seen Elastigirl before?
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quick. order her a turtle costume for halloween.
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One of those kiddie pools with arm straps?
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I think it’s a combination of the lense used, the camera angle, and her ponytail making her neck look longer and thinner. She’d probably look much better (and normal) if you saw her in real life. Love her expression in the second pic.
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Clearly an alien hybrid.
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(((Stanley Fischer))) every fucking time
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Jeez this guy is a fucking de facto Israeli. Appointed by Obongo from the Bank of Israel. Good fucking riddance.
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What is wrong with you?
At least prefix these articles NSFW for Christ’s sake
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Gollum’s sister.
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Dick move, bro.
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That piece of onion or whatever it is looks like an earthworm and creates the shock appeal of this photo. It looks like she is eating a worm sandwich. I am reminded of some of Publius’ stories of business colleagues in Chicongo. Gross!
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You bastard!
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[…] Source: Heartiste […]
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[CH: fuckin lol, you beautiful freaks!]
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Now I’ll never take joy in seeing that sweet child again…
… you blackguard. 😡
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Dammit, PJ….there’s no need for that
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Such violence.
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ha
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In a world of cigstaches, taco toad would be a beauty queen.
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Naw… with a gun to me gulliver, I’d have to take ciggy… but first she’d have to shave.
Nothing could improve that other monstrosity.
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Incomprehensible. And you got three likes for it.
TT at least appears fully female. She could be much improved with some washing, diet and manners.
Cigstache – probably has both a FUPA and a peen at least as big Scalzi. Consider also breath and age. The things wrong with her cannot be fixed.
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Eye of the beholder, friend… eye of beholder. 😉
And then there’s that gun to the haid, of which I spoke.
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Modern men want to know, are they offering anal?
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Not sure if I could pick either. They’d probably end up shooting me if there was a gun to my head.
I might be able to force myself to do the deed with TT. While I’d rather have a platonic talk with Cigstache, by far … as far as s3x goes, my answer would be a written-in-granite No.
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I want to believe in the law of averages – such that for every Tacotoad there’s an better-than-average hottie to be seen … but it’s just not adding up – and I’m very close to becoming completely grossed out.
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The horror! The horror!
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Heather Heifer was more disgusting.
http://www.occidentaldissent.com/2017/09/06/the-fat-heather-heyer-hoax-signals-the-greatest-narrative-collapse-in-modern-history/
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“Fat” and “collapse”. . . .how could they not see that?
kekekekek
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heh…turns out just a car backfiring coulda stopped her double-stuffed ticker.
James Fields is innocent!
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I would go out to lunch with cigstache – she wouldn’t eat off of my plate.
Plus, I prefer my ugly natural – and not augmented.
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This belongs on Goodbye, America, because it is without a doubt the single most cringe inducing display of what we put up with.
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I’m thinking TT is a well fed Gollum.
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The longer I stare the more I have a warm fondness for cigstache.
She’s seen a lot in her days and has wisdom to share. Sure, she’s not easy on the eyes, she’d be the first first to tell you, but in that face there is optimism and dare I say it even beauty.
Also, she unquestionably voted for God emperor Trump.
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Just can’t help but think what a disappointment Taco Toad must be to her (probably divorced) parents. What an ugly, graceless blob.
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I think he owes us for posting those two pictures.
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Cigstache looks like she’s seen some shit. Bet the stories are horrific and gut wrenching. Still better than TacoToad
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sorry CH I think cigstache is a dude
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Heartiste, I would agree with your analysis regarding the above two’s personalities. Being older, I lived in a time the beauty ideal / standard was something that all people still strove for. Nowadays, there is a much larger segment of society that flaunts their hideousness rather than try to minimize it.
Cigstash is someone who for mysterious purposes, god chose to not have any outward beauty. But at least she does not disfigure herself intentionally or draw attention to her plight. Low self-esteem has helped her smoke, gain weight, and dress poorly but she has not defaced herself.
TacoToad strikes me as someone who deliberately goes out of her way to offend people’s sensibilities as a way to qualify for life’s booby prize. If she is going to be an ugly bear, she may as well be an ugly grizzly. I have no doubt that she wants to feel that our revulsion towards her has nothing to do with how nature has programmed us and everything to do with racism-sexism-etc. She probably feeds off of it. Ugly meaningless tattoos, lip ring, problem glasses, and black fingernail polish all tell me she not only hates herself, but everyone else as well.
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The hipster plaid, problem glasses, ‘ironic’ knuckle tats… you just know her soul thoroughly vile.
Poor Cigstash is just a victim of poor genetics and fetal alcohol syndrome.
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At least with cigstache I can imagine doing some fun stuff at lunch like arm wrestling and lighting farts.
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I used to manage pubs in Sydney. Have met plenty of Cigstaches. They are rarely bad people. Often they aren’t even bitter about drawing the low card in life. They put a high priority on just being with other people and relaxing. They overwhelmingly prefer the company of men, who pretty quickly stop judging them and treat them as one of the boys.
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I know a cigstache-like youngish woman. A tough case of genetic back luck. No health problems, just everything put together all wrong. She’s one of the coolest, no-subtext, positive people to be around.
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“Your preferred asexual lunch date”.
Uh, none of the above. Of course, the final tally would be Cigstache – 3, Tacotoad – 1, None of the above -10,546.
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Depends how many ‘groids get to vote….
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Meanwhile, Reddit deletes some real talk from a frustrated beta whose porker wife is trying to drag him down into the depths of fatness.
http://archive.is/IfldT
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Tacotoad, since I am allergic to tobacco.
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I agree with your assessment, Heartiste. Cigstache at least looks like someone who’s looks have built her character. Tacotoad seems like a bratty, self-righteous bitch.
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God, my EYES!!!
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Ohhh great. So we are being given a choice between being poked in the right eye with a red hot poker or in the left eye.
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Cigstache is roughly every Nick Offerman character. Lunch with her could result in her resurfacing your head and lapping your valves next weekend. (No, not that way. We’re eating here.)
Tacomunch talks with her mouth full and laughs at stupid shit. Lunch with her will have you spitting her food from your own mouth.
Cigstache.
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Ciggy coz she’s not as gross
“I get a thrill from torturing the retinas of my readers. It’s not like some of you don’t deserve it.”
Maybe but it’s not nice to make fun of the retarded. Taco looks like she has downs Syndrome
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I’m not sure exactly what I’m seeing here. Is it some sort of deformed mestizo (redundant, I know) monstrosity? A (((skype)))? I can’t really tell the sex either. I’m repusled by what I see, but morbid curiosity compels me to look.
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There is something curiously endearing about Cigstashe. She seems to be without pretense.
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That Tacotoad chick has a nauseating appearance
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I think the discussion about Cigstache v TacoToad is pointless.
After reading this a few days ago, I was surfing the DS today and came across this thing:
There is nothing more boner-killer than Chelsea the Hubbell.
Sorry, not sorry, that I don’t know how to embed pictures of the Hubbell face in my comment.
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Oh, crap, there it is. How’d I do that?
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