Chateau Heartiste

Chicks Dig Serial Killers: Extreme Jerkboy Edition

Thought experiment: If you could choose between being a law-abiding, upstanding beta citizen who has all his freedoms but the freedom of enjoying prime age pussy well into dotage, or a serial killer who has none of his freedoms but the freedom to enjoy prime age pussy well into dotage, who would you be?

One of world’s worst serial killers fathers baby with pen pal 40 years his junior

she’s no raving beauty, but a 40 year age difference and prime fertility can tint any glasses a rosey hue

Jailed ex-cop Sergey Tkach, 65, may have murdered more than 100 women and girls, including one aged only eight.

In a 25-year reign of terror, the cold-blooded psychopath had sex with the dead bodies then used his police training to hide his sickening crimes.

That’s some pretty bad shit, but never fear, this monster won’t want for the love of a much younger woman. Love wins!

His wife Elena, who was not born when he started his killing spree, was a teenager when she saw the jailed monster in a TV ­interview and became besotted with him.

To save our women, we must kill our TVs.

Elena, 25, sent him perfumed letters which led to prison visits and, in 2015, they wed. Tkach is yet to meet their daughter Elizaveta, born 19 months ago.

Why are serial killers who have sex with the bodies of their dead victims allowed to have visits from outsiders at all? Shouldn’t chain gang labor in an icy wasteland far away from women be their fate?

They have regular conjugal visits yet Elena does not fear for her safety, even though Tkach has access to kitchen knives in the ­apartment they use.

She is equally unconcerned about her husband’s victims. In a shocking interview she revealed: “I don’t feel guilty because I did not commit the crimes. Of course I’d not wish this on anyone and if it happened to my family I’d punish that person.

“But I didn’t do anything.”

The killer was jailed in 2008 in Ukraine, where there is no death penalty. She said: “When I saw his interview there was a sort of ­magnetism. I wanted to have a conversation, get to know him. I wanted to make him like me.”

“I WANTED TO MAKE HIM LIKE ME”

Gentlemen (and curious ladies), this is the core reactor of the female hindbrain. Everything you need to know about how to seduce women until they fall uncontrollably in love with you is exposed in those seven words.

YOU MUST BE A CHALLENGE TO WOMEN. If you show your cards too soon, she doesn’t get to enjoy the female-specific thrill of making you like her. Rob a woman of her need to prove herself to you that she is worth fucking and loving, and she will resent you with a heat the equal of the passionate fire she will feel for alphas like Tkach.

You don’t have to go the Full Tkach. You just have to be more of a jerk than the typical pedestal polishing betaboy.

She said: “I felt happiness when I ­realised I was pregnant. I wanted this baby and he wanted this baby but she was born in Russia and my parents and the officials won’t let me bring her to this country.”

Right now, there are dutiful beta hubbies begging their wives to ditch the pill and bear them heirs.

Meanwhile Elena coolly campaigns for the release of Tkach…

Repeal the 19th. Women can’t be trusted with political influence.

Three times-divorced Russian Tkach was sacked from the Soviet police in 1979 for falsifying evidence. He began preying on girls across Ukraine and Crimea, ­typically strangling them before violating their dead bodies. He evaded capture for a quarter of a century and was finally snared in 2005 – after brazenly attending the funeral of one of his young victims.

Why can’t we unleash these guys on migrant camps?

Rowe says fiercely jealous Elena ­insisted an ­all-male crew visit the couple in the cosy apartment where they enjoy marathon sex sessions.

While you, beta male, have to wait until your birthday for a half-hearted hummer.

Criminals such as Tkach are usually held in cages but Ukrainian laws mean all married prisoners are allowed a three-day conjugal visit every two months.

Elena previously told Ukrainian media: “If I had to deal with his previous wives they wouldn’t be walking this earth any more. I wouldn’t let anyone within a mile of him. I’m a very jealous woman.

“I’m not scared by his conviction. Good women are scared of him. If that’s the case, there is less competition for me.”

No one mate guards as fiercely as a woman deeply in love with her one-of-a-kind alpha male.

Rowe said: “She made it clear to me and my team we were not to bring another female to the interview for him to ogle and lust over. She dominated the ­conversation. It was strange. She seemed to relish the attention he gave her.”

And an attention whore to boot. The media may not have created death row groupies, but it has rewarded them and possibly encouraged in these women more blatantly shameless pursuit of infamous murderers.

In bizarre scenes, the couple snog in the prison flat which looks like any normal marital home. Tkach boasts: “Today we can hug and kiss freely.” He then makes a joke about eating glamorous Elena’s lipstick.

But when alone in his cage he shrugs off his crimes and chillingly tells Rowe: “Women are guilty of everything. If I killed 30, so be it. I did not appeal the verdict.”

This guy is an alpha male. You may not like it, but this is what Peak Alpha Male performance looks like. It’s not a moral distinction. It’s an SMV designation.

Guards check on Elena almost hourly to ensure she’s still alive in the compound…

But Elena says she is not scared of having sex with him. And she disputes claims he sent more than 100 people to early graves.

She said: “I don’t fear anything negative. I don’t believe the total. I believe it was a lot less.”

“A hundred murders? Eh, I don’t believe. Ten or twenty murders, now that I can live with.” – woman.

Local media reports that Elena is desperate for three kids by the ­monster, who claims he still has a “strong seed” despite his age.

lmao. Why wasn’t this dude sterilized? Now humanity has to deal with his psychosprog.

Deluded Elena is reported to be confident that Tkach, who has four children from previous ­marriages, will one day be released.

woops, looks like humanity is too late.

She is said to have bragged that they will build a home on the shores of Lake Baikal in eastern Russia.

Elena said: “His age, health and the presence of children could serve in his favour. I love him. I’m sure ­everything will work out for us.

“He’s the harmless one. I’m the dangerous one.”

The labcoats have given this a sciency name: hybristophilia, sexual arousal for and love of someone who has committed heinous crimes.

Personally, I think the term is useful only as a descriptor of the behaviors of women at the extreme right tail of normal female sexual nature; it isn’t some alien subset of women it’s describing so much as it highlights what women are like when their natural urges are amplified to the point of pathology. All chicks dig jerks, but not all chicks dig serial killers. How many women are capable of falling in love with serial killers rather than just run-of-the-mill charming jerkboys? That is the question, and if the percentage is higher than 5% of women, we have to seriously rethink the wisdom of universal suffrage.