Spot The Chad

Why is this post titled “Spot the Chad” instead of “Spot the Alpha”? You’ll understand why after seeing the photo I’ve attached:

This is REO Speedwagon, pre-snowflake era rockers. Despite the classification I’m about to reveal, all these guys got mad pussy. Comes with the job.

They were (are) all alpha males according to the CH and Darwin definition of alpha male:

The alpha male attracts hot women, attracts women strongly, and attracts a lot of women.

Quantity and quality of female interest defines the alpha male.

By that metric, all the members of REO Speedwagon were alphas, hauling groupie pussy in its prime like a shrimping net.

But within the subset ‘rocker’, we find subtle and not-so-subtle physiognomic differences of male value. In the photo above, there is a clear Chad and a clear Cuck.

CHAD: far right (ofc)
INTENSE ALPHA: 2nd from left
GOOFBALL ALPHA: far left
NICEGUY: middle
CUCK: 2nd from right

FYI, “intense alpha” is the brooding artist type who may or may not leave a lover before morning light. “Goofball alpha” is the class clown if the class clown wasn’t a secretly low self-esteem basketcase.

The Cuck with the homo pose is the lead singer, Kevin. The Surfer Chad is the bass player, Bruce. So did their real lives match their physiognomies? reactionary writes,

Mostly. Kevin was their lead singer and had a very effeminate/annoying voice. Bruce was there bass player and would occasionally do vocals. “Back on the Road Again” is sort of an alpha song.

So what distinguishes the Chad from the generic alpha male? Politics, for one. No Chad is With Her. In point of fact, very few alpha males are With Her, so that’s not telling us much. The Chad phenotype tends to more often align with conventional views of what characterizes an alpha male (heavy jawline, Eastwoodian squint, overhanging brow ridge, mesomorphic frame, perpetual smirk). This serves as a reminder that more often than not, real life alpha males don’t look like central casting alpha males. They don’t look like soyboy cucks either, but the physical properties of the alpha male span a wide spectrum.

Crucially, I think the biggest delineator of the Chad is his aversion to emoting. He keeps it “close to the vest”, except when he’s giving atomic wedgies to nerds. There’s an IDGAF vibe about him that says “when the time comes, I’ll gladly take up sword and rid our land of these locusts”. Balancing this is a hint of playfulness in the eyes, honed from years in middle and high school teasing girls to heights of tingle eruptions.