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Archive for the ‘Beta’ Category

Background. The story is nominally about Germans “adopting” Syrian refugees into their homes, but in reality it’s about German women with the thousand cock stare welcoming Syrian schlong into their godless holes and effeminate German betas sitting legs-crossed in the corner pretending to be oblivious to their literal cuckolding. I mean, look at the mischievous smile and crazy eyes on this woman. She’s got that lit-up face that says this might be the first time in her life she’s felt excited thinking about getting fucked through the floor boards.

As for the kraut cuck, he’s looking into the middle distance trying to beat back the bad thoughts creeping up on him with happy thoughts of all the unctuous flattery he anticipates from his pozzed social circle.

Germany: seventy years to go from sheisselord fearsome to scrotally fallow. What a ride.

***

For a migrant from a war-torn hellscape, that Syrian looks surprisingly well-fed and robust. Not at all like the half-starved and frightened widows and orphans president Butt Naked claimed filled the ranks of these refugees.

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Petition to rename Google to Spoogle, to better reflect the company they have become: A rePOZitory of the hoariest antiWhite, pro-globalist elite propaganda you will find this side of the race cuck Hajnal line.

Google spooges its equalist leftoid disease all over America’s face, and we are supposed to sit here and take their toxic homo loads without protest?

Remember Spoogle’s motto, “Don’t be evil”? HA. That didn’t last long. How about “Destroy your anus.” This is a good time to jettison all Google products and Google-affiliated products from your lives. There are alternatives. You just have to…. bust a move. The fight against White dispossession has to start somewhere, and it’s a small sacrifice to unlatch from Spoogle’s AIDS dick compared to the sacrifices that will be required of you in the coming years.

PS If you Spoogle “happy american couple” this is what your favorite search and replace engine returns:

Not a parody. Try it.

Fuck (((Spoogle))). They want a war? They’ll get one.

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I post this gif clip with the knowledge that there’s a strong possibility it was staged. (h/t IHTG for passing it along) But, assuming for the sake of Game proficiency inculcation that it’s an authentic capture of a moment in time when an alpha move goes wrong, it’s a decent learning tool to educate aspiring womanizers in the fine art of saving face.

Explain how, if you were in an identical scenario, you would recover from this unexpected flirtation backfire.

This is serviceable Game, (until the busted finale). The “beta provider lure and alpha jokester takeaway” is a staple of fun&sexy flirty pickup. But, ya know, sometimes the actress goes off-script. When that happens, you’ve got to adjust on the fly. Alpha males are good at adjusting on the fly. Beta males aren’t; they mostly react with butthurt stupefaction when girls throw them a blue ball.

Expert level recovery from a failed prank on a girl usually takes one of two forms:

  • A naughty, ZFG chuckle (you win even when not winning, because you amuse yourself so much)
  • A deadpan “I was expecting that” expression

In this instance, it would have been a good recovery (fit for Jumbotron viewing by the general public) if this guy had grinned post-slap, shrugged his shoulders, and then slowly moved the juicy morsel to his mouth, making exaggerated contortions of delight as if he was fully enjoying the deliciousness of his snack. Even funnier if he then looks at the girl and says, “So good”.

Briefly, what NOT to do when your alpha move goes wrong:

  • Act insulted
  • Cry
  • Ask why she was such a bitch
  • Try the same prank again, harder and clumsier
  • Sulk, brood, or retreat into a betaboy wound-licking bubble of silence
  • Chastise her, “You will not slap your way to the Presidency”

If you react in any of those ways, it can be fairly said you “Jebbed” yourself. A good, old-fashioned Jebbing will deep-six your chances with a girl faster than a John Scalzied nip slip.

So, stay calm and carry on as if nothing disturbed your inner jerkboy peace. Because it didn’t. A slap from a girl who was “in a mood”? Please. That’s practically foreplay.

ps yeah i know there are wiseguys in the studio audience who will say “rule 1: don’t be a nowag”, but this asian dude appears to be decently put-together, and the girl might be his girlfriend. plus, she’s cute, so he’s doing something right.

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By a healthy margin of victory, it’s Pajamaboy! (also known by his Valusian name Ethan Krupp)

Could it really have been anyone other than Pajamaboy? He’s emblematic of the decline of the American man to a sniveling male.

Think about this: PuffedHo, Salon, and Slate, with a combined readership in the tens of millions, are staffed almost 100% by bluehair feminists and effete manlets like Pajamaboy. These fugs and nancyboys control the vertical and the horizontal information gateways for a misshapen army of degenerate freaks oozing their id disease all across America’s fruity plains.

That’s a lot of punchable shitlib faces waiting to be caved in by your righteous fists of fuhrer. Limber up!

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The “winner” of the 2015 Punchable Shitlib Face Tournament will be the peabody puffboy who emerges victorious from the Championship Bout between Dylan Matthews and Pajamaboy (née Ethan (((Krupp)))).

Matthews handily dispatched McKay Coppins in the preliminary finals bout, as voters felt he had the face more likely to inspire a fusillade of knuckle sandwiches. On to the match!

Ladies and gentlemen…. in the far left corner…. Dyyyyyyyyyyylan Maaaaaaaattheeeeeeeeeewwwws.

And in the far, far left corner…. Paaaaaaaaaaaaajamabooooooooooooooy!

Matthews “leans in” to take a hit from a blood and soil patriot….

Pajamaboy offers both cheeks for back-handed slaps from feminists who secretly despise his male genus….

Matthews taunts the crowd, asking them if they have the stones to wipe the smug off his face…

Pajamaboy raises the stakes, sticking a pinky out form his mug of cocoa and wagging it at the balled fists of a phalanx of shitlord spectators…

Matthews does that Morpheus “bring it” hand as he brags about his high verbal IQ and miserable math skills….

Pajamaboy announces he’s “strapped on” and ready to “Lamaze the poz”…

this is gonna go down to the wire, folks!

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The 2015 Punchable Shitlib Face Tournament semifinals are over, and Dylan Matthews soundly defeated Matty Yglesias in Bout 1, while Pajamaboy BARELY eked out a win over Lindsey “GayPedoFace” Graham.

McKay Coppins waits in the wings for his chance at taking more punches to the face than Dylan Gaytthews.

Finals, Preliminary Bout: Dylan Matthews vs McKay Coppins

What’s he looking at so suspiciously? Ah yes, the black man approaching him from a quarter mile away.

Fivehead, four eyes, three chins, two T cells, one punchable shitlib.

The winner of this preliminary finals bout will advance to the championship slumber party pillow fight with none other than Pajamaboy! I can’t wait, how about you?

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We’re back for the 2015 punchable shitlib face semifinals!

Bout 1: Matty “Yce Yce Baby” Yglesias vs Dylan “I’m hiding a buttplug” Matthews

Don’t be surprised if your hand reflexively curls into a fist looking at Yglesias. And multiple viewings which could conceivably inure you to his smug doughboy plushness don’t seem to lessen the urge (more like amplifies it).

Trouty Mouth“.

******

Bout 2: Pajamaboy vs Lindsey Graham

twink4

Keep in mind, president buttsecks and his staff thought this milquetoast clad in jammies sipping from a hot mug of cocoa was a good representative to sell their healthcare boondoggle.

“Phew, do you smell that?! Oh, teehee, it was me!” Peter Pan, meet yourself in fifty years.

******

Stop the lugenpresses! We have a last-minute punchable shitlib face addition to the cards! He’s a former heavyweight champion of punchability, and a million Buzzfeed fans demanded his inclusion, so the winner of the Yglesias vs Matthews match will advance to a bonus bout against

McKay Coppins.

my hand… curling into a fist……. cannot stop it…….. cannot……. *SWING*……. *CRACK*……….ahhhhhhhhhh

McKay Coppins, for those who really must know the bios of our nation’s listicle artisans, is an ur-shitlib who lies for Buzzfeed. His mug is making the rounds because he was at a recent Trump rally and claimed to have overheard someone yell “Light the motherfucker on fire!” to a protestor; “someone” likely meaning him, a left wing plant. Look at that doughy concave croissant Coppins sports for a face. It’s easy to picture him screeching “light the motherfucker on fire” in a faggy tone with a barely-concealed smirk as he thinks of all the good copy this will generate for his online bathhouse.

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