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Forget flying cars and interstellar travel, the next big thing to radically transform society will be sexbots.  Japanese girlfriend substitutes, lifelike dolls, porn saturation… all signs are pointing toward a technological coalescence of immense implications for relations between the sexes.  It’s a horny new world on the horizon of men having sex with the artificial women of their dreams.  Mein Gott.

Much has been written about the sexbot phenomenon, with the skeptics focusing on the technical limitations (men make this argument) and the insistence that sexbots would not satisfy male sexual desire like real women would (women make this argument).  It’s possible the technical hurdles to creating a sexually pleasing mechanical woman that could compete with real women might be too high, but assuming those hurdles are jumped, I offer the following future scenario.

A robot that is an exact replica of your favorite supermodel and that has feedback to sound and touch (for example, she’ll move her limbs and gyrate during sex as well as talk dirty and respond to commands) would supplant all other masturbation tools as the preferred method of getting off for men who can afford it.  Once sexbots become affordable, internet porn consolidates to one or two websites for spank snobs who insist on “authenticity” and proles who must suffer the humiliation of not only being too poor to afford real women but fake ones as well.  But, outside of self-pleasure and procreation, would sexbots replace real women?

For some men, yes.  The replacement would be total, at least until the dating market adjusted to the new reality.  For other men, sexbots would be a part-time replacement.  The result will be a shift in the mating landscape that will put selection pressures on humanity equivalent to a massive plague or a catastrophic famine.

Sexbots are a very real threat to the established order because men’s sexuality is so visually driven.  Compared to women, it is a rather simple affair to create an alternative sexual outlet for men.  Think about romance novels which are the porn equivalent for women.  It’s a mentally-taxing affair to write a book, even a trashy, plot-by-numbers one.  But displaying photos of naked women for the consumption of men takes a few mindless seconds.  Now imagine a Natalia Vodianova sexbot in every bachelor pad.  The raw visual and tactile appeal of that will keep men holed up in their bedrooms for weeks straight.

Some of the changes I foresee:

Omegas (geeks, nerds, dweebs, trolls, dregs, dullards, bums, street filth, etc.) – will finally have a satisfying release for their pent-up horniness.  Crime will likely drop as a result.  So will rape.  Widely available sexbots are analogous to cheap, legal prostitution, minus the STDs and needle tracks.  On the whole I think it is a social good to distract the losers from their grinding misery.  Since these guys weren’t getting laid anyway, availing themselves of sexbots won’t have much impact on the dating market.  Sexbots could also be compassionate.  Giving a homeless guy a sexbot will do more for his happiness than $5 for liquor or a sympathetic smile from a cute soup kitchen volunteer.

Betas (niceguys with a heart of gold and zero sex appeal) – the more frustrated betas will retreat from the dating scene to be with their sexbots.  They’ll not opt out completely, though.  Having a decent job and a willingness to help raise a family is still a form of buying power.  I see sexbots for betas dissuading them from learning the art of seduction, thus making them even more ineffectual in the field as their already-meager skills atrophy.  He might think to himself, “what’s the point of dealing with the frustrations and delayed gratification of dating mediocre looking women for subpar sex when I have a Rachel Weisz sexbot waiting at home for me?”  A big negative feedback loop could result, where the lower status betas exercise their sexbot option with increasing regularity until they have excluded themselves completely from bothering with meeting women.  This will open up room in the dating market for

Aspiring Alphas (betas who know a thing or two) – As low status betas and omegas retreat from the dating scene to be with their sexbots, aspiring alphas will be more in demand than ever.  It’s a simple numbers game — more women for every man willing to expose himself to the whims of dating and rejection from real women means these men will have an easier time honing their game and achieving sexual satisfaction.  Even a guy willing to put in minimal effort shaping up his game will find the pickings easy.  The consequences?  Less commitment, more casual sex, and more partners.  Not to mention more first date anal.  You can stop taking salsa classes now.

Alphas (guys who won’t have to martyr themselves for 72 virgins) –  will reap a tremendous beaver bounty.  The direct and indirect benefits of the sexbot revolution will flow to the alphas.  The direct benefit?  Although he is the guy who won’t need sexbots because he gets plenty of quality real ass for little investment, he will probably have a few in the closet for those times when his girlfriends have a collective headache.  Plus, the off button is very appealing to the inveterate womanizer.  The indirect benefit?  More women vying for his seed.  I predict that over time the smothering ego-boosting attentions of the fangirls will make the alpha soft, paving the way for lower ranking males to usurp his position in the bangarchy.

Ugly Women – drop out entirely.

Plain Women – put out on first dates.

Beautiful Women – choose harem initiation with a super alpha.

Marriage – uncertain.  Either marriage will take a bodyblow from which it will never recover, or paradoxically divorce will decrease as husbands inclined to stray fulfill their cravings for variety with non-human mistresses.  With the sequestering of betas to their sexbotatoriums, the price of alphas on the market will skyrocket.  They will call the shots in matters of marriage — I see a regression to sanctioned polygamy and overt adultery.  This will herald the end of Western civilization.

Love – The virus in the borg.  Love may save the day.  A man’s need for love will keep him in the game.  But not in the same capacity.  He’ll be roused to go on a few dates but he’ll feel no pressure to get laid and will probably have unrealistic expectations about what kind of women he deserves based on wistful comparisons with the hot robot he fornicates with daily.  Ladies, if you think guys are selfish, egotistical pricks now, just wait until they start showing up to dates basked in the afterglow of sex with their Jessica Alba robots.  It is going to take a lot more to win over a guy who is that sexually satisfied.

Conclusion – The entire market structure of dating will shift seismically in the direction of men becoming choosier and less willing to please and women becoming looser and more willing to please.

The basic premise I have outlined above rests on a simple observation — the more physically satisfying choices men have to sate their lust, the less needy they will be with women.  And non-neediness translates into a slight downgrade in the asking price of single women.  Because women are more loathe to settle than men, there will be a rush to the top as the dwindling number of acceptable male prospects commands the attentions of an ever-growing pool of women.  Polygamy will rush in to fill the need.

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dennis-kucinich-and-wife.jpgGuys see a picture like this and think to themselves “wow, if he can land a babe, there’s hope for any guy.”  Clearly, Dennis Kucinich has landed an alpha babe.  And not just a tabloid exploiting fame seeking fly-by-night whore.  These two lovebirds are married.  It is clear from her body language and how she speaks of him that she truly loves him.  How is this possible?  Examining the basic facts, we see a large disparity in their relative sexual attractiveness.

  1. he is much shorter than her
  2. he is goofy looking; she is a beautiful, lithe, redheaded bombshell
  3. he is a lot older than her (31 year age difference.  she’s 29, he’s 60)
  4. she is feminine.  he is… feminine
  5. he has unicorn and rainbow politics

So how did he do it?

We get a hint of that in a couple of quotes from his wife, Elizabeth:

People who see us together understand – they see our connection. And it’s not like I’m some ditsy young thing and he’s an old fogey. He has the wisdom of an ancient and the energy of youth. Dennis says to me, ‘I’ve never seen myself as time-bound. When you make a connection on a soul level, age is not important.’

So Dennis has managed to neutralize the age objection by acting (and looking) more youthful.  This does not surprise me. Younger women appreciate a youthful outlook on life. Yes, acting young brings with it the risk of seeming immature, especially to older women looking specifically for an older man, but the risks are outweighed by the benefit of appealing to a much broader base of young women.

Another thing that comes through in her quote is the connection they share.  Connection, or mutual understanding, is one of the least understood (especially by men) and yet most important factors in what keeps a relationship strong.  Elizabeth was probably intrigued by Dennis at first because of his position of power as a US congressman, but his hippy dippy personality perfectly in tune with her whimsical “child of the soil” bohemian style sealed the deal.  They are on the same wavelength.

Here’s another quote:

As for having a family – Elizabeth says she would like children some day – Dennis says, ‘There’s no problem there.’

From this we can conclude that Dennis is confident in his ability to get hard and inseminate her with his flower power seed, despite his advanced age.  Perhaps his vegan diet keeps his arteries clear and his member functioning.  More likely, it is his incredibly hot wife 29 years his junior that helps him spring to action like a horny high schooler.  Young beautiful women are like souped-up turbo-charged Viagra/yohimbe/coke cocktails.  The majority of middle-aged men using Viagra are looking at the prospect of sex with haggard dumpy wives, so no wonder they need pharmaceutical assistance.

Connection, youthful vitality, and a high status career.  Those are the things that won Dennis his perfect 10, and they were appealing enough for Elizabeth to overlook his numerous shortcomings.  Often, when a woman is in love, she will grow to be blind to those negative traits in her man that might’ve otherwise turned her off when they first met.  This is a great example of how differently attraction works for men and women.  The mirror image of this situation hardly ever happens.  No matter how deep the connection or how youthful the outlook, vanishingly few men will want a relationship with a much older, unattractive woman.  They may want to be her friend, but they won’t want to fuck her.

The alpha male is not always obvious to the naked eye.  How many times have you walked down the street and said to yourself “what the hell is that guy doing with HER?!”  Or all those losers you know who’ve hooked up with women way out of their league.  What’s going on is that alphaness is not always a baseball bat to the head.  Sometimes it is a subtle thing, imperceptible to outsiders, a way he walks and moves or how he handles himself in conversation.

Or maybe Dennis has a 12″ cock.

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Unauthorized Thoughts

The killer of 32 people at Virginia Tech used a .22 caliber and a 9mm pistol.

Why wasn’t this guy rushed by anyone?  He’s calmly picking people off.  Bloodshed all around.  Imagine you’re there, trapped in that classroom.  You know you’re as good as dead if you just sit immobile like a juicy target, so you may as well lunge for him and drive your thumbs in his eyes.  You might still die, but you’ve improved your odds dramatically, especially if you go at him during a reload.  He’ll maybe get off one or two shots at you but handguns are notoriously inaccurate, especially when a person is running into your face disturbing your zen-like aiming.  You’d stand a good chance of him missing or you incurring a non-fatal flesh wound.

So a rude thought intrudes.  Engineering campus.  Nerds.  A taxonomy of guys who’ve probably run from fights their whole lives.  Total inexperience with summoning the warrior animal spirits.

There are times of crisis when brainy deliberation or pavlovian avoidance response will do a man no good.

Maybe the bullets were flying so fast, the killer so accurate (from marathon sessions of video gaming I bet), the timeframe so compressed, that in the chaos no one had an opportunity to do anything.  Well, except for this guy.

But if that’s not the case, then I’ll be uncharitable and ask…

did nerdiness cost lives?

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