The Iconic SJW Face

It’s hard to choose one face that stands — or scrunches — above the rest as the iconic social justice warrior (SJW) face. But I believe I have found it.

This Harry Potter tranny was snapped at a Ferguson protest in Portland. Like most SJWs, she is a raving beauty. That knitted brow which will never unknot. Those beady, judgmental eyes. The boycut. The thin, sexless lips pressed into a perpetual Puritan’s scold.

The overall impression one gets is of that fat judge with the testicle chin in Pink Floyd’s ‘The Wall’.

All she(?)’s missing is the pitchfork and torchlit mob, and a witch to burn for heresy against the Church of Anti-Racism.

If only degenerate SJWs could see themselves the way others see them…. I doubt anything would change. Cult religions and their followers are immune to the emotions and sympathies that sway normal people.

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The Art Of Playfulness

Women love playful men. Playfulness, broadly defined, is nonverbal teasing. Or it’s the physical and verbal working together as an insincere form of taunting. Not many men are naturally playful, especially with attractive women. Men tense up in the presence of sexually enticing women, and this discomfort is anathema to cultivating a playful demeanor. Playfulness is lost with age, as well. Boys are breezily playful, but their effortless joy and naughtiness eventually succumbs to moodiness and the grind.

Not in all men, though. Natural Lotharios have a gift for retaining much of their youthful playfulness, which they love to display in the company of women. For example:

This girl buries her face in her hand and laughs because she has experienced a pleasant sensation: the mischievous flirtation of a cocksure cad.

Playfulness is attractive to women because it’s a type of humor. Women love funny men, and all that spazz. You don’t need to be jacked or ripped to tease a girl into a swirl of charged hormones. A six pack is great, but you know who’s going to get the girl more often, and be adored in loving honorarium by more girls?: The guy pulling playful stunts like the one above.

This is not to say playfulness has unlimited use. All play and no lay makes Jack a null void. Playfulness is like an indirect opener where the romantic intention is hidden under a layer of funnyman obfuscation. At some point, you have to drop the act and break the Fourth Wall, giving due to the sexual tension in a less joking manner. Excessive joking can quickly come to be perceived as emotionally distancing.

There’s one other reason women love playful men, and it’s the most crucial ingredient in the dynamic between the performer (man) and audience (woman). Playful men appear to suffer no worldly burden. They seem at ease, living in the moment, stress-free and unconcerned with public opinion. Leaders and charismatics share these traits, and women are powerfully drawn to such men. If we understand that women are attracted to certain male personalities that suggest an easy, worry-free life full of material comfort (and resources to be mutually enjoyed or effortlessly gathered), and bountiful choice in mates, then it makes sense that playful men trigger limbic love pulses in women.

Playfulness, then, is best seen as an indirect signal of female preselection (“he’s done this before with women and knows from experience it works”), outcome independence (“he doesn’t fear rejection or social opprobrium”) and self-assurance (“he’s not nervous or supplicating”). Playfulness is the opposite of desperation.

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SJW Game

SJW (Social Justice Warrior) Game is described by commenter “Matthew Yglesias is a sex god”:

Jerkboy game has nothing on SJW game

1. Read Huffinton Post, Slate, ThinkProgress, and Vox religiously. Check in with the NYT on occasion for a moderate opinion.
2. Regularly post on facebook articles about the benefits of eating local and organic, heartwarming tales of minority children, and uplifting quotes about how happiness is more than just material wealth (since you yourself have a shitty job).
3. Don’t lift weights
4. Boast of your support for women’s rights
5. Impress girls with your knowledge of craft beer and artisanal cheeses
6. Continue wearing an Obama t-shirt into 2015
7. Whenever the bro who’s banged several of your attractive female friends leaves and is safely out of earshot, loudly proclaim “wow, that guy’s such a douchebag.”
8. Marry a Lena Dunham look-a-like at the age of 33
9. Rejoice that your wife doesn’t want to have kids, giving you both more time to devote your lives to helping others
10. Drunkenly hit on your apolitical friend’s attractive wife at a cocktail party. Get rebuffed.
11. Go on game websites and ridicule them for being misogynist posers who don’t actually get laid

Numbers 7 and 11 are the sharpest shivs. So many shitlibs I’ve known who guffawed about some cool jerk’s “douchebaggery” once he was out of the room. “Douchebag” has morphed into a catch-all SWPL term for a white man with noticeable muscle development, fearless social command that attracts slender women, and insufficient fealty to leftoid groupthink. It’s the Wormtongue whine of the bitter androgyne.

MYIASG’s comment arrived too late to be included in this week’s Comment of the Week (COTW) sporting event, but it will be grandfathered in as a submission for Comment of the Year.

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Alpha Or Beta Male?

Sandals. White tube socks. Is that a fanny pack? His fashion sense is clearly beta.

But then there’s his body language. Leg up, the fulcrum of his maleness insolently displayed under her nose. If this were a gif I bet we’d see him swinging his pelvis into her. A fat nerd in the distance looks on, horror-stricken.

Alpha or beta male? Let me put it this way: If I wanted a solid wingman, and my choices were 1. a dapper fellow stylishly appointed and subtly accoutered to catch the inquisitive female eye, but shy and liable to spend the night leaning against the wall for support, or 2. tube sock guy fearlessly projecting his male sexual entitlement, I’m taking tube sock guy, every time.

Boldness beats style, and it’s no contest. Why? Because a nerd with a ZEROFUCKSGIVEN attitude can be molded into something great. But a retiring fop who waits for women to approach him has to make an attitude adjustment before he can be great. The ALPHA ATTITUDE is the bedrock of tight game. It’s a lot easier to improve a man’s wardrobe than it is to improve his attitude, so rock out with your socks and cock out, Package Delivery Man, you’ve got that special something chicks dig.

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Ten Hours Of [X] Walking In NYC

Inspired by the subversively realist Shoshana Roberts catcall video, a hundred “Ten Hours of [X] Walking in NYC” parody videos have sprung up like facial scruff on Amanda Marcotte. This is a good one:

“Judge me by my size, do you?” 😆

Mockery is the best tonic for feminist idiocy. I can smell the feminist butthurt. *sniff sniff* I detect notes of hairy asscrack.

***

This video would’ve reached epic status if it ended with Chewbacca sidling up and roaring at her, and she gives him her number.

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What’s It Like To Fuck A Fatty?

It may astound some readers, but yer ‘umble instigator has no experience fucking fat chicks, rare one-night hummers from borderline chubsters notwithstanding to the contrary. Of course, no man needs to know what it’s like to fuck a fatty; our vision is keen and our imaginations sufficient to piece together a porky pastiche.

However, it does serve as a helpful reminder, especially to the older gentlemen in the audience who may’ve mistakenly jettisoned BMI standards for the reward of perky youth, to paint in technicolor detail the morbid flesh tsunamis that roll during sex with a fatty. So we here at CH turn to the experience of readers who have submerged themselves in the corpulent deep.

Reader Shortest Straw dishes the dirt,

The only problem with fat asses is their only sex position is missionary. If they’re on top of you it’s just nasty, and if it’s doggy style, well, there’s nothing quite like watching the waves propagate across their behinds. Funny as fuck when you first see it but then it gets distracting and pretty soon the boner is gone.

***

If I’m drunk enough, I can [fuck a fatty]. I get into thinking about how happy they are to be getting fucked.

There’s a certain line even I won’t cross, though. You see, it’s self limiting: The drunker I have to get, the more likely I won’t be able to get it up anyway, and the more likely I’ll be to just pass out.

However, a combination of viagra and ritalin both offsets those two effects, and pushes me into an alternate reality. If I remembered it better, I could describe it. Let’s just say I’ve had laundry to do in the morning.

Apparently, to fuck a fatty you need to have a sense of humor and a tolerance for ODing on mind-altering pharmaceuticals.

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Shoshana Roberts Insider Info

“joe” writes,

Shoshana used to live in my current city, and was actively involved in my blues dance group. I don’t remember meeting her, but after my local dance lady friends started posting this video, some bragging about knowing her, a quick Facebook search showed that we have over 20 mutual friends. With that said, two of my male dance friends are “red pillers”, and both contacted me to via private message to share their thoughts. For starters, both were quick to mention her tits, each saying how unabashedly proud of their being real that she is. One said that it’s entirely common for her to regularly wear revealing tops (no surprise there), and the other said that she danced with him in his living room, topless (“I assure you that they are real”, she apparently told him).

In short, we have a good, ‘ol fashioned attention whore. Now, let it be known that my being lover of women, I am not opposed to women flaunting their feminine figures; though, I do take issue with their both doing that and then crying “street harassment” when men take notice. Correction, they take issue when men whom they don’t deem as being sexually desirous take issue.

As I said, I don’t recall ever meeting Shoshana, though I surmise that our paths will eventually cross, assuming that she’ll find her way at my town’s annual blues dance festival, or that I go blues dancing in Manhattan on my next visit.

The attention whore epidemic continues to rage.

Ideally, what (attractive) women want is a world arranged to their liking, which means a world where lesser men know their place — silent, retiring, respectful, and unassuming — and alpha males — the top 10% of all men — are permitted to admire their beauty in however a manner they see fit.

This world will never happen because convincing 90% of men to essentially neuter themselves is like persuading a fat feminist to slim down and behave sweetly. Men are wired for the hunt, women are wired to be hunted. All the liberty-curtailing laws and thoughtcrime witch hunts in the world won’t change the fact that the prey will never dictate to the predators which of them may participate in the chase, the catch, and the consumption. A hungry man has little incentive to obey rules that perpetuate his hunger.

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