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Archive for the ‘Game’ Category

Two blog posts offer a valuable insider’s look at a couple of pickup artist workshops (aka “bootcamps”). There aren’t enough impartial customer-based reviews of seduction workshops which aim to teach men the science and art of game, so any information that seems authentic — i.e. not written by a friend of the PUA guru as a marketing gimmick — will get highlighted here for the readers’ benefit. And the Chateau offer to readers who wish to write guest posts about their experiences with bootcamps, good or bad, still stands.

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The first review comes from KrauserPUA. He came across this popular Chateau blog post featuring a video of PUA Yad doing a street kiss close in ten minutes that you have to see to believe. It is one of the best videos out there testifying to the power of game to create sexual attraction in women from absolutely nothing except pure energy. KrauserPUA was suitably impressed, and decided to contact Yad to work on his daygame skills.

Part Three of Four: I take a one-on-one tutorial

I’ve been frustrated with the recent plateau in my game. Any time I go out daygaming I’ll come home with a fistful of numbers / facebooks / instant dates but I’m just not converting. In addition my state is still too variable and some days I struggle to hook sets. Hours of DVDs have been studied, blogs read, and introspection performed. I’m well over 500 sets into my daygame career. Time for some outside help.

There’s not many good daygamers out there. I’m fully prepared to drop a few hundred pounds on high quality instruction – this is a part of my life that consumes hours and hours of every single week – but I need to find a guy who is not just better than me but who also has a style that fits. Having been in the London scene since last summer I whittle the short list down to five names. One name stands above all others so I email this guy. A week goes by then he accepts the proposition and quotes a price that is high but justified if he lives up to his rep.

Readers know I constantly admonish aspiring PUAs to mistrust snake oil sellers and to insist on in-field evidence. I sought out this guy because (i) I’ve seen legit in field vids of him (ii) a number of people I know and respect spoke highly of him and (iii) his haters fail to find any credible argument against him. What didn’t interest me in the slightest was whether he worked for a famous pick up company.

But a good video does not necessarily a good instructor make. Maybe the guru can perform well when it’s just himself opening sets, but fails when he attempts to impart his knowledge to acolytes. I have heard from friends who took bootcamps that oftentimes the instructor’s method of teaching is to simply push students into sets like a marine sargeant barking orders.

We meet and go to his house to watch my videos. For over an hour he is playing them, pausing and commenting on what I do well, do badly, fail to do, and related theory behind the observations. He’s a technically astute and observant guy. About 90% of what he says I’m nodding my head in immediate agreement and there’s a few things in particular where I’m thinking “woah, that’s spot on. I totally didn’t realise that”. Before we’ve even left his house I feel I’ve gotten my money’s worth. The main insights:

– I’m failing to build rapport quickly
– I’m not talking enough about her
– I’m not personalising the conversation.

So far so good. Students need to take some responsibility for a successful workshop experience as well. Having videos of yourself approaching girls would, I imagine, greatly aid instructors trying to help you figure out where your flaws lie and how to fix them.

We head out to Oxford Street and he demos the first set, a leggy Austrian girl in short shorts. He hooks easily and its ten minutes much along the lines of what’s in the above linked video.

Sounds like this guy Yad is as advertised in his street pickup video. There are a lot of hucksters in the seduction community, (as in any burgeoning business model with an underserved base of potential customers), so when the genuine article comes along, the Chateau will extend its praise.

My thoughts?

He’s definitely the real deal. Although in raw performance I out-gamed him (closed hotter girls, got the instant date) I think that’s just because he wasn’t in his top gear and was spending more energy watching me than gaming for himself – which is exactly what he should be doing as a paid instructor. There’s no doubt in my mind that the famous “10 minute kiss close” video linked above is legit.
There is absolutely nothing about him or his game that I can’t do…. eventually. He’s not relying on his looks, money or position. Every part of his success is behaviour, words and vibe and he showed me how he got those skills. I simply have to keep working until I get them too.
His game is essentially the same as mine, just better. I trend more towards the alpha / masculine side but beneath his gentle yeti exterior he subcommunicates strong masculine polarity and the girls pick up on it.
His apprenticeship relied upon the same nerdish laser focus as my own: diarising the time, approaching girl after girl, day after day, committing fully to the skill set.

It’s great to see someone who is good enough to make it worth modelling their behaviours, and yet close enough that it feels attainable. This guy is a proof of concept – you can bang the hottest of girls in the prime of their lives using nothing but learned game and with no physical or situational advantages. This is the very embodiment of game.

Glad to see this guy found a good instructor and success for the money he paid. The Chateau, as usual, is ahead of the curve in identifying and bringing to the readers valuable information and resources that will improve their game and love life. There is more to KrauserPUA’s review, so go there to read the rest. He’s a proponent of the instadate; you should be, too. Instadates are flake-proof.

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The second insider-y review comes from regular reader Kidstrangelove, who writes about his experience with a PUA lair event in New York City (not to be confused with pickup workshops which are more intensive, and also more expensive).

First off, the meeting space was in a dance and acting rehearsal center, and the first thing I saw when I walked in were dancers of all ages. Was I in the wrong place? No, there it was, the familiar look of peacocking, in full presence. I have never really seen intense peacocking till that day, thinking that the infamous Mystery and Neil Strauss pic was just a tall tale. […]

Luckily for me, the guys that spoke at the very first lair meeting I attended were Rob Judge and Zack Bauer, two guys whose philosophy on girls influences till this day. So I figured, what the heck, I’ll come to a few of these. Now, one year later I can give you a good description of what goes on there, so here we go – the good, bad and ugly of the NYC lairs.

Kidstrangelove goes on to list the good, bad and ugly of this particular lair meeting. Examples:

The speakers, knowing that they have very little time to talk, usually give you their “best material”. You really save a lot of time, money and effort, and without the need to filter through marketing bullshit. I heard that Richard La Ruina, aka Gambler, had a notorious reputation of being more of a marketer than a coach, but when I heard him speak, he really got to the core of what his philosophies were about, and I actually learned something. […]

Mystery gave a brief presentation in Virginia a few years ago (before his VH1-induced fame hit the inflection point on his power curve) which representatives of the Chateau attended, and the same impression was had — the core philosophy was ably covered in the short time available. Mystery is more charismatic than the average dude in real life, and highly intelligent, but if you observe carefully you can make out the latent nerd in him bubbling just under the surface, like Lewis Skolnick about to let loose with an asthmatic cackle. In the future, cultural anthropologists, if they are fair and balanced, will regard Mystery as a more important philosopher and paradigm shifter than the leading economists and respectable mainstream pundits of his day.

A huge chunk of the people that come there are socially inept in one way on another, and therefore make SHITTY wingmen. From lifelong nerds, to people new to the USA with the unsexiest of accents, to people who think verbal game is the end all, be all of self improvement (and therefore do not concentrate on their appearance). You can tell – a lot of these guys need help, on the bright side, however, they usually are persistent with their changes. But I don’t want a protege – I want an even matched wing, or better yet – someone BETTER than me.

There are some natural alpha males who attend pickup workshops and seminars, but the majority of attendees are nerdy or otherwise socially maladroit men who happen to have good-paying jobs and lots of discretionary cash. The money and societally acceptable lifestyle is obviously not getting them laid, so they turn to PUA teachers to lead them out of the wilderness. Hopefully, these gurus take their responsibility seriously, because they are doing nothing less than saving lives from years of soul-crushing loneliness. You want to make a man happy? Get him laid.

This is also why the Chateau has repeatedly counseled — against the strawmen of the haters — that the goal of PUAdom is not to get nerds laid with “9s and 10s”, but to get them success with women a point or two above what they are normally used to dating. Such an improvement, if executed on a society-wide scale, would cause a massive seismic disturbance in the mating market that would be felt from the cities to the country, by cougars and by kittens. One million average men suddenly dating up from 4s and 5s to 6s and 7s would have a huge impact on the dynamics of the dating market, starting with a crash in the entitlement stock of millions of plain jane American women. The younger, inexperienced and idealistic men ask: can a man be happy with anything less than a 10? Of course. In real life, when a man learns the skills that enable him to date 7s instead of the 5s he has spent his whole life dating, his happiness shoots through the roof. Most men would be perfectly content dating women just a point or two better than their usual fare.

People Lie and “Embellish the truth”. There was always a question and answer session before each meeting. You can tell a lot of these guys are exaggerating, you can tell a lot of these guys are straight bullshitting. My bullshit detector is very strong, but to an absolute beginner – they might believe the hype. It’s like keyboard jockeying – live and in front of you!

Yes, anytime there is status and money (big sums of money) on the line, there will follow lies and marketing. Your job as an educated consumer is to sift through the detritus to find the few gems worthy of your expense.

Some Instructors are either horrible or limited. I think I’ll let my friend’s post on CH’s blog answer that. I was there. The presenter was Nick Sparks of The Social Man. And everything said in that post is true.

The Chateau is not anti-PUA workshop. They undoubtedly serve a valuable function as thousands of men are still ponying up big bucks to instructors across the world in the quest to attract more and better quality pussy. If the bootcamps and workshops were all scams, it would be common knowledge by now, nearly a decade after the first in-field seminars were established.

But there are shysters out there, and they need to be identified and shamed out of business. Plus, many seduction businesses charge what seem to Chateau proprietors to be exorbitant fees for what they are delivering. Nonetheless, that is more of a moral issue than a business ethics issue, for as long as there are men willing to spend thousands for weekend trips to the clubs with experienced PUAs, the market will respond by charging those prices that maximize profit.

So all in all it was an entertaining experience. Would I recommend it to others? Sure, because going to these meeting represents a proactive step in getting better with girls, which we can all respect and agree on.

In due time, the sorting process will allow the cream of the seduction businesses to rise to the top, while the squirrelly outfits sink into oblivion. Websites like this one can be a valuable consumer protection resource. In the future, perhaps the Chateau will set up a ranking system of the best to worst pickup workshops and bootcamps and their instructors, which readers can reference at a glance should they decide to shell out for professional instruction.

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Reader Andy writes:

Hey,

I like the blog and have picked up some tips. Thanks.

I have a great tip for you based on a recent post. You talked about how “it’s complicated” is a great answer to a majority of shit test questions. It’s OK, but I have the mother of [all] responses. [Editor: MOAR!] You have to use it sparingly though to make it most effective.  I was taught this in sales training many years ago.

When someone askes you a question you might not want to answer (for whatever reason, or no reason at all) you respond with “why is that important for you to know?”.

It totally moves them from aggressive to defensive.

If you’re an older guy and a chick asks “how old are you?” you say immediately “why is that important for you to know?”, what could she possibly say in response? If you think a chick is a gold digger, when she inevitably askes “what do you do for a living?” and you answer with that, what is she gonna say? “because I’m a gold digging bitch and don’t want to waste my time with a loser”. Nope. She’ll get all flustered and give you some answer and feel like an idiot. Perfect time to close.

The actual success rate of this sly evasive maneuver is less salient than the frame shift it accomplishes. If, for instance, a girl asks what you do and you don’t want to tell her, saying “why is that important for you to know” won’t necessarily budge her from trying to find out at some point, but it will put her on the defensive. And a girl in the defensive crouch is a girl giving birth to gina tingles. When you induce a girl to explain her fascination with you and your goings-on, her avaricious hindbrain will be tricked into registering your status as higher than hers, and from thence intimacy may commence.

“It’s complicated” and “Why is that important for you to know?” are two MOARs every aspiring Casanova should have in his arsenal of seduction.

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A Solid Neg To Open A Cashier

The neg open is not to be underestimated. When opening very cute chicks it’s almost a necessity.

Reader BuhBrian writes:

I suddenly used this line on a cashier girl yesterday I’ve seen at a store a few times.  While I didn’t go for the number **, I amused myself in this spontaneous exchange.

Her:  you want your receipt?

Me:  No thanks. Hey, didn’t you used to have braces?

Her:  (caught off guard)  no..

Me:  Really?.. You look like someone who just had their braces removed recently.

Her:  (rather confused and flattered)  I’ve never had braces in my life actually…thanks.. blaa blah something, have a good weekend.

Her tone was good, and really accepting.  I detected no attitude or insult in her voice at the braces remark.

Telling someone I thought they had braces is in someways a neg (your teeth must have been real fucked up, I’m sure), but underhandedly came out as a complement (nice smile). Which wasn’t my original intention.

**  Since I didn’t go for the number.  I just passed that moment by because of my dreg-ish wimpout tendencies.  Plus she was working and people were lining up at the register.  My alphaness wasn’t strong enough to not care.  But I do have a legit related question.

Q:  What are your thoughts on getting girls numbers from places you routinely shop and see them.

The braces neg is a good all-purpose neg, useful on cashiers and all kinds of women, including lawyers. I’m not surprised the girl reacted positively. It’s what girls do when they aren’t sure you insulted them or complimented them. Rev, lil’ hamster, rev! In the case of cashiers, where you don’t have the luxury of context or of time to open her the traditional way, a neg open can jolt her into a flirty frame of mind.

Transitioning from the neg open to a number close with a line of people waiting behind you is a difficult proposition. She is going to feel harried and unable to focus on exactly what you’re asking of her. You could build an insta-bond by letting her know you are aware of the stress of the situation.

“There’s a big line of people behind me, so I can’t linger here long. I don’t normally do this, but write your number on my receipt. I promise I won’t hold your naturally straight teeth against you.”

No doubt there are other ways to number close cashiers, so the floor is thrown open to commenters to add their suggestions.

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Proximity Alerts

Mystery discusses the attraction signals girls send when they are in the vicinity of a man they wish would approach them.

He makes a very good point toward the end of the video. In groups of two or more girls who are loitering near you, it’s the girl with her back to you who is the one who finds you attractive. In my experience, this is true almost all the time. It must be something subconscious which triggers a clutch of chicks to automatically arrange themselves in this manner. The advantage it offers the interested girl would be a chance to discuss with her friends — who have their eyes on you and are judging your reaction to their presence — whether you are checking her out and how alpha you are up close, while simultaneously giving her plausible deniability that she would like you to approach.

See, girls have game, too. It’s called coyness.

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Non Sequitur Game

A reader emails:

I’ve found a version of one word game to be highly successful: one-word non-sequitur game.

It’s great for initiating text messages if you don’t really want to be the one to “initiate”.  I discovered this accidentally by typing “yo” and pressing send, but the auto-correct changed it to “up”.  It causes the girl to wonder what you’re typing about.  And even better, she wonders if you were actually texting someone else.

It can’t be a long or uncommon word.  Too implausible.  It has to be a word one would conceivably use in conversation.  Ideally, a one word declarative.

You may only be able to use it once on each girl.

Possibly the perfect choice? “No”

I like it. Non sequitur game is mystery bait. An odd word or fragmented sentence is like an eight ball to her head hamster — the little rodent will snort it right up and spend the next hour spinning frantically trying to figure out what you were saying, or — *squeal with delight* — whether it was meant for another girl.

I’ve done the accidental non sequitur text to girls, and come to think of it they did text back immediately, asking me to clarify. It’s a superbly sneaky tactic to trick a girl to chase you.

Some other truncated non sequitur game examples:

“see you at”

“leaving” (this one will trigger her threat of loss anxiety)

“we’ll see”

“wow!”

“cocka”

A similar version of non sequitur game is reverse eavesdropping game (REG). This is where you send a text to a girl that has nothing to do with her and is clearly not meant for her, thus inducing her to “eavesdrop” on your putatively private conversation. The REG text should be constructed such that it hints at your high value and/or social proof. Something like “bring the chips and i’ll get the booze. it’s gonna be crazy.” Or “hey troublemaker, how are those red heels holding up?”, which is quite devious since you have any number of plausible excuses to explain the text to her — “I meant to text my friend. She stole a pair of shoes yesterday” — but not before she has stewed in her jealousy for a while. The beauty of the REG DHV (aaaand two consecutive acronyms! high five me!) is how effortlessly it slips under your target’s poseur identification alert system. It’s almost as if a third party is communicating your high value to her. Naturally, she will be inclined to text back immediately, and this will mindfuck her into thinking you are a higher value guy than she originally thought.

REG texting is similar to trial texting. Text game really deserves its own book.

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Apropos of yesterday’s post, there is valuable game ore to be mined from those study conclusions. For example, here is an excerpt from one of the studies:

Engaging in uncommitted sex may be one form of female-female competition. If this is so, we would predict that women attribute to other women comfort levels that are higher than they, themselves, feel; this would generate PI that would heighten women’s awareness of potential threats from female competitors and may motivate women to engage in competition.

A clever man could use this information to gain insight into female thinking, and thus improve his odds of fuck closing any one girl. He now knows, thanks to science (and his own experiences if he isn’t brainwashed by feminist agitprop), that women are likely to overestimate other women’s comfort with casual sex in order to gain a competitive advantage at securing and keeping an alpha male’s attention. A woman is, in short, more likely to sleep with a man if she thinks other women are quickly and easily putting out for him.

A man can use this knowledge of female psychology to great effect in a seduction. All he has to do is hint — suggest ever so slyly so as not to alert her poseur identification defense system — that other women have been giving themselves over to his charms with questionable rapidity.

“I don’t know about girls these days. They’re so quick to jump into bed. Not that there’s anything wrong with that.”

***

“Sex has become so devalued. Girls hardly date anymore. They make it so easy for guys.”

***

“Not so fast. I’m the romantic type. The last girl I dated was a stripper who wanted to have sex on the first date. it’s crazy out there.”

Etc.

This is the idea behind Female Competition Exploit (FCE) game. Commenters are free to provide other examples of hastening F closes utilizing the Pluralistic Ignorance sociosexual concept.

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Overgaming

I got this illuminating email from a male reader:

I recently started reading your blog. I am usually fairly successful with women, though I could definitely improve my game. In particular, I lack the boldness and swagger your archetypal alpha possesses. I needed practice.

I met this girl a couple weeks ago and we texted back and forth. Because she lives about an hour away and is a little below my market value, I wasn’t planning on an effortful pursuit – but I did cross my fingers for convenient banging. Last week I invited her to hang out, and – suggestively – proposed she stay the night. Likely because of the beta-manner in which I made the suggestion, she became defensive, saying she doesn’t sleep with people on the first date…etc and so forth – I felt at the time I was too upfront. She said she wouldn’t come down, but that I instead should come up and go dancing with her and her friend. I said maybe, but canceled later. Last night she randomly texted me. I thought, what the hell, I’m going to try and follow the dark lord’s benighted example. I was literally stunned at the results. While I’m sure my banter was sloppy, and even cheesy, the difference in reaction this week compared to last was remarkable. What follows is our (somewhat lengthy, I apologize) text conversation. She was all tingles.

My texts in italics:

So guess who just got in a fight at the club?

A fight?

Haha yeah… She threw the first punch though

I see – did you win?

Of course! Im tough, and she backed down

hmmm, i don’t know if i need a trouble maker coming over

Haha funny, im not a trouble maker… It was self defense…and who said I was coming over…

lol fiesty i see 🙂

Haha i can be feisty 😉

Show me.

Maybe this weekend? you’ll love it

I better

Oh ok Haha. Well i hope im On’t disappointed 😉

Never fear

Is that a promise?

A threat 🙂 if that’s possible lol

Mmm even better 😉 Cause i get feisty when someone threatens me, i like to fight back 😉

Yes, seems like you like to fight 😉 How about we fight, and you can try to stop me

You MAY have your way with me, whatever you want

?? That sounds kinda submissive

Hmm is that a bad thing? 😉

No, but i hope you put up a good fight

Yes, im a fighter 😉

Good, cause if you don’t, it might be rough

The more rough, the better

Happy to oblige. Mmm, but you’re so innocent

Innocent? Im far from it, i can be a very bad girl

Ha ha innocent looking then. . . we’ll see how bad . . .

Oh my, im so turned on right now!

Think you can you stay wet until tomorrow. . . when you come down?

Of course. Im wet right now

. . .and think, we’re just talking. . .

You’ll be surprised. Im a classy women, but i love to have fun 😉

Classy? You just got in a fight at a bar! 🙂 🙂 🙂 🙂

… A club. And that doesn’t happen often. 😦

Only kidding

Well, im sure im not the only one turned on…

There’s someone else??

You’re not…?

Oh, I thought you might be with your friend

Hahaha no! Im laying in bed alone now

Tragedy

True. I was referring to you though

Another tragedy

Haha for you.

Partly

Yes… What are you thinkin?

Its complicated . . . But arousing

Tell me 🙂

You might be too innocent

Doubt it

Putting it to words would destroy your imaginative curiosity

Oh wow, now you have to tell. Im curious

Well, you might have more success in a wrestling match if you brought backup. . .

Oh i know what you’re thinking… You’d like that huh?

Maybe you would too . . .

Possibly 😉 But wouldn’t i be enough?

. . . Normally, but I am insatiable

Perhaps in the future i could bring a friend…

Gotta make sure i’m quality huh?

You will be

I understand, well I should sleep, plan on tomorrow?

Haha yep 😉

***

Again, I’m still completely stunned, and convinced – dominant, forward, laconic = gina lube. Doubt I could pull this off in person, texting is easy. I’m also sure there is a lot of beta in there. Any suggestions for improvement?

I’m curious if the girl wound up going to this emailer’s place the next day, or if she flaked at the last minute. While this text exchange has (mostly) the right frame, it smacks of overgaming. And overgaming can quickly activate a woman’s anti-slut defense. There is a lot of back and forth here with a girl you haven’t even had a date with yet. Reading this, my initial impression was “entertainment monkey”. You’re feeding her snappy alpha quips with the calculated smoothness of someone who knows this will stroke the psyche of his mark. And she knows you know. The risk here is getting LJBTed — Let’s Just Be Teases.

Overgaming is usually poison to a pickup when the girl is very high value. Hot chicks experience the pleasures of smooth alpha operators more frequently than do lesser girls. Your clever retorts and masculine lack of punctuation are nothing new to the hot chick. She will enjoy it and place it in her mental pile with the rest of the suave suitors. You need to bring something more to the table, and that something is *escalation*. Escalation is what separates the men from the dilettantes. Establish your frame, parry her shit tests, laconically disabuse her of the notion that you can be boxed in beta-wise, and then cut the flirty courtship short either by exiting prematurely or forcing the seduction forward into more dangerous psychological and kinesthetic territory.

Despite the overgaming by the emailer, I think he is in good shape to close. The key information in this pickup attempt is “[she] is a little below my market value”. Women subconsciously know when a man who is seducing them is better than what they can normally expect to date. If you, as a man, judge that you are higher value than the girl you’re picking up, it is likely that she is aware of the same value discrepancy. What this means is that her hypergamous impulse will be sated by your attentions; she will be quicker to forgive your beta missteps and happier to indulge your excessive alpha badinage. She will, in sum, put out easier. So a good rule of thumb when seducing women at or slightly below your own market value is:

Overgaming > undergaming.

Go ahead and flirt endlessly with the 7. She is grateful for the dry hump love, and will probably succumb to your later game when pressed.

But if she’s too much lower than the median mate value of girls you can get, overgaming will cause her to prick up like a porcupine. Girls want to be played, but they don’t want to be sloppily overplayed like a marionette. She will balk if she thinks you have assured yourself she is an easy mark, and her ego will reassert itself, even at the expense of losing a mating opportunity with a higher value male.

If you’re about to lose a girl because of jet-fueled cocky banter, a good antidote is vulnerability game. Overgaming kills attainability, and male attainability is a necessary (but not sufficient) precondition for female surrender. Sharing a self-effacing story designed to humanize you will establish your attainability, and draw her closer to you.

Conversely, if the girl is hotter than what you normally get, your overgaming will be perceived as cloyingly indulgent. Her poseur alarm will go off. A Texas girl would think you are “all hat, and no cattle”. Sure, the hot chick will enjoy your clever ripostes, but it will still be YOU doing the chasing, feeding her an endless stream of movie moments while getting nothing in return but platonic banter at best and apathetic toleration at worst. And to get a hot chick, you have to arrange the seduction so that it seems to her that SHE is chasing you. For very hot chicks:

Overgaming < undergaming.

If I were this emailer, I would have ended the texting about halfway through when her buying temperature was peaking, with a vague hint at continuing it at some point in the future, preferably in person. I also would have dispensed with any threesome innuendo. It’s too strong for initial flirty banter, particularly as it went on in this example for long enough to ping her perv radar. It’s possible that she will wake up the next morning feeling a little dirty, and not in a good way. Save the threesome talk until a month or two into a sexual relationship.

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