It’s a perennial question among aspiring skirt-chasers:
Should the novice seducer cut his teeth on hot babes or ease into the womanizer’s ways on less intimidating plain janes? It’s the “stepping stone” theory versus the “immersion therapy” theory, and there are equal numbers of advocates for each model.
CH take: On paper, the Hot Babe Immersion Theory is more sound than the Plain Jane Stepping Stone Theory, but in practice I think it has some limitations which I will discuss below.
Reader themanofmystery2 gives the best argument in favor of Hot Babe Immersion,
CH, what do you think about this approach for newbies? I’m teaching my late-teens cousins this tactic.
Find the hottest women in every situation, and ONLY APPROACH THEM. they are likely to produce the most anxiety, but there is no substitute for logging the time and experience. Every minute spend chatting up a 10 makes you more skilled at chatting up a 10. The conversation itself should be the goal, just to log the hours. Get on the fucking bike and fall off a few times. Skip past the training wheels.
Benefits:
1. If you score, it’s a fucking home run and confidence builder
2. If you get rejected, there’s no shame in getting rejected by a 10. Happens to the best of us.
3. 9s and 10s, for various reasons espoused here and elsewhere in the manosphere, tend to have sweeter dispositions and are approached less than 6s, 7s, and 8s. This results in less Bitch Backturns.
The logic appears airtight. “If you want to get better at seducing hot babes, you’ve gotta talk to hot babes.”
And all three benefits themanofmystery2 describes are valid: successfully seducing a hot babe is a confidence boost on par with closing a multi-million dollar deal, the rejection won’t sting as much, and HB8s, 9s, and 10s are less antagonistic than 6s and 7s, the latter’s shitty attitudes effected in no small part by the greater number of low value men hitting on them (because they think they have a chance).
No argument there. HOWEVER… based on what I’ve sometimes seen happen in the field with my struggling friends who skip past the dross and head straight to the frothy top-cream, there are some drawbacks to following the Hot Babe Immersion Therapy protocol that aren’t immediately apparent to classroom analysis.
Some negative feedback loops in the Hot Bab Immersion Therapy model:
- a very inexperience man will find it exceedingly difficult to maintain state control in the interactive presence of a very beautiful woman.
You can lead a beta to a beauty, but you can’t force the beta to talk to her without loading his pants. Shock and awe may be a lethal military strategy, but in the sexual market it’s usually the beta male standing there shocked and awed into stupefaction by a dazzling beauty. For a beta like this, it’s simply a better strategy to overcome tingle-killing social awkwardness with practice on girls who don’t fry his brain, and then move on to hotter women as his state control skill improves.
- hitting on the hottest babes is sometimes used by goofy betas as a cheat code for avoiding putting real effort into the seduction.
There’s a temptation among some of the more extroverted betas to unseriously hit on hot babes, and then take their blue ball home and claim victory. If this beta had instead hit on a less outrageously alien prospect like a plain jane, it would be harder for him to rationalize potential rejection as a “waddaya expect?” ego assuaging ploy. Unlike the afterglow of a happy post-HB9 perp walk that he would enjoy, he won’t be able to walk away empty-handed from an HB6 without feeling a little bit like a failure. And that’s what will spur him to make the necessary changes.
- there’s a risk that the beta confuses friendly but asexual politeness from a hot babe for seduction progress.
This paradox was noted above. The hot babe will often be a more pleasant prospect to talk to at first because she won’t have as many bitch shields deployed as will the lesser women who must bat away the entreaties of all sorts of loser men. The very UNAPPROACHABLE HOTNESS of the hot babe protects her from unwanted beta and omega male solicitations. This is great for padawan betas who want practice chit chatting with hot babes, but there’s an insidious undertow: that hot babe’s affability is also likely to be misconstrued by novice casanovas lacking the acumen to distinguish sexually intrigued IOIs from polite friendliness. The risk of this happening with plain janes is obviously lower, because any attention from these mediocre girls that falls short of massaging your crotch bulge isn’t likely to stimulate overeager appraisals of reciprocated romantic interest.
- hot babes are often nice babes, and that’s not necessarily a good thing for the novice seducer.
A hot babe hasn’t cultivated an air of nastiness or defensiveness like her more attainable sisters, so she’ll have a harder time turning up the volume on turning down a no-game-having, insistent beta male. The hot babe’s false acceptance of the socially clumsy beta can lead him to commit all sorts of cringing faux pas as he begins to believe he really has a shot with her. When she does snap and lower the boom, it will hit him like a ton of bricks, because he wasn’t expecting it. In the meantime, he will have learned nothing and his seduction skill will not have made any improvement. In contrast, the beta male can expect more shit tests, teasing, aggressiveness, qualifying, and token resistance from plain janes. Surmounting these common female obstacles will do more to hone his pickup skill than polite head-nodding from super nice hot babes.
- hot babes almost ALWAYS have men in their lives. Plain janes often don’t. The rookie rogerer has, all else equal, a better crack at unclaimed crack.
The goal is sex, and sometimes even love. You can practice on hot babes and watch their faces glow with curiosity, but if they are taken that’s just one extra hurdle (a tall one) that you’ll have to jump if a bedroom finishing move is more than just an abstraction in your head. Getting ACTUAL NOTCHES under your belt will go a long way to boosting your confidence major, and as long as you don’t dip below some female attractiveness threshold that matters to you, then a sweaty night with an HB7 will pay more psychological dividends than a sexless night chatting up an HB9 for an hour. Now, this doesn’t mean you have to stay at that middling level; it means only that it helps to get to SOME level if you want to advance to higher levels.
***
Despite everything I’ve just written about the benefits to remedial lotharios of practicing on plain janes, I say there is room on the practice pitch for spectacular, high risk shots on goal. My advice is to mix it up. Hit on the plain janes and the hot babes. The honest feedback from the former will rapidly improve your game, while the effort spent on the latter will slowly inure you to their intoxicating beauty. Until, one day, the exquisite beauties become your daily bread.
And, in the meantime, a bonus: when the plainer girls see you flirting with the hot babes, they’ll be a LOT more receptive to your company when you decide to give them a chance. There’s nothing better than a fully lubed seduction.
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