The Reality Of Game: Trump Negs Klum, She Responds… Predictably

Vox points out that Donald Fucking Trump used a classic game tactic — the neg — on (former) supermodel (and mudshark) Heidi Klum, when he said “she’s great, but no longer a 10”.

You know a man is a mega alpha when a single casual neg directed in an offhand manner at a former supermodel results in two videos and multiple public statements as the woman desperately tries to qualify herself to him.

The tingle-stricken lady doth protest too much.

The sheer incoherence of Klum’s remarks underline the degree to which Trump’s dismissive remark rattled her. That, gentlemen, is how it is done. Identify the insecurity and casually press. You know you’ve hit the nerve when their reaction spans days.

The alpha does not qualify himself to women, ever. He expects women to qualify themselves to him.

ABQ: Always Be Qualifying.

Oh, and ladies, a helpful reminder: If you are a White woman of incomparable beauty, don’t throw your genetic heritage away on a coalburning “F YOU DAD” mission. When you get older and less attractive (as you assuredly will), people will feel less urgency to extend you kindness and deference because your family looks weird and they’ll have doubts about your character. Can I get a two-for-one ‘heh’? Heh.

(Trump’s remark actually straddles the line between a neg and an insult, although a man with as much preselected alpha goodness as Trump has more margin for error in this matter. Nonetheless, I’d still call it a neg, because he did butter her up first before delivering the backhanded compliment.)

***

Also from Vox, another demonstration of the power of Fame Game over women’s attraction triggers.

The best part about Game is watching a girl become “noticeably more interested” in you as you weave your biomechanic magic. It’s very satisfying, even apart from the normal anticipatory excitement that accompanies courtship.

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Game Tactic: Wounded Warrior Peacocking

wounded warrior
bloodied and calm
a silent storyboard
to her heart embalmed

Reader Noel describes the reactions he got after he injured his hand.

2. observation. conversation starters. I don’t know if CH et al. would classify it under ‘peacocking’. I recently messed up my right hand bad [typing only with left] so had surgery, and now the hand is in a splint. People seem to gravitate to it naturally and start conversations [‘what happened?’] along with eliciting a lot of ‘poor you’ remarks and ‘get well!’ wishes. The handicap is real not apparent like peacocking, and obviously it doesn’t show some evo superiority…but it lubricates social intercourse! surprisingly people are thrown off when i give a non-straightforward answer….i don’t know if it’s my delivery or people in san francisco [where i am] lack a sense of humor….

Don’t underestimate the power of wounded warrior game (of which scar game is a profitable subsidiary). Girls flock to men who look like they’ve stepped out of the beta drone office cubicle to survive a spot of adventure. A man’s injury, or permanent mark of a past injury, is rocket fuel for the female fantasia callosum, which she herself eagerly fills with anticipated tales of ZFG (zero fucks given) alpha rogue exploits.

Your job, should you choose the alpha path, is to strike the incipient fantasy chord always taut and ready for a symphony in her brain with your boning fork. Then, allow her imagination some time to run wild before revealing your secret, which of course you should reveal with the maximum vaginally-approved embellishment.

Why are women intrigued by a man with a scar or a wound?

1. Injuries are evidence of a fighter.

Deep, deeeeeeep, in the female hindbrain there resides a poetess who scribes limpid odes to a man who has taken all comers and emerged victorious. It’s evolution all the way down in this instance; women can’t shake that irrepressible lust for a man who bears evidence of his ability and willingness to physically protect them from danger.

2. Injuries add drama.

All women are drama whores. The difference between women and their love of drama is one of degree, not kind. You have to scale some courtship walls before you can take her on an adventure. Add a scar, and she’ll beg to go on the journey.

3. Injuries are a palimpsest over a soul full of brooding pain.

All women are also nurturers, more or less. The nurse in her begs to tend to your wounded soul, a soul which is easier for her to summon into existence if your body bears the stigmata of real wounds.

4. Injuries are the next best thing to female preselection.

Show up to a club with a beautiful woman in your company and other women in attendance will autonomically experience a swell of desire for you. This is because you are a proven commodity. (Women rely much more on these proxy cues of mate value than do men, who merely require a split second visual appraisal to activate the courtship ritual). An injury or scar works like a beautiful woman, plus the added benefit of an implicit invitation to find out more. Certainly, an omega male loser can have a scar, but women are wired to assume, usually correctly, that scars are most often the badges of men who don’t play marathon video game sessions in gloomy bedrooms or rant ineffectually on male feminist tumblrrheas. As Noel experienced, you will have an incredibly easy time striking up conversations with inquisitive girls if you’re hobbled or engraved with proof of past battles.

Piercings and tattoos are probably a “safe” scar-lite form of mate value enhancement preferred by hipsters and freaks, but now that women have co-opted the same symbols of warriordom they might not be as effective for men. You’ll need the real thing now. Surgically embedded knife wound scars?

PS When a girl asks about your scar or injury, a classic opening reply would be “Ah, it’s complicated.” Sexual innuendo also works, if the moment is appropriate: “Bedroom injury.” Another good reply is to make up an obviously phony reason for it: “Fighting my way out of ISIS captivity”. But I think the most productive reply is one that alludes, loosely, to a troubled time from your past: “I got it a long time ago. It’s not something I like to remember.”

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Scott Adams On Donald Trump On Game

Scott Adams wrote a couple of short essays on The Trumpening that are basically recitations of core game concepts (some of which are retrofitted from ideas first introduced by Robert Cialdini in his book Influence: The Psychology of Persuasion). You will find many of Scott’s points, and Trump’s tactics, explained in depth in the CH archives.

Would Trump use his negotiation and persuasion skills in the campaign? Of course he would. And we expect him to do just that. […]

As I said in my How to Fail book, if you are not familiar with the dozens of methods of persuasion that are science-tested, there’s a good chance someone is using those techniques against you.

For example, when Trump says he is worth $10 billion, which causes his critics to say he is worth far less (but still billions) he is making all of us “think past the sale.” The sale he wants to make is “Remember that Donald Trump is a successful business person managing a vast empire mostly of his own making.” The exact amount of his wealth is irrelevant.

When a car salesperson trained in persuasion asks if you prefer the red Honda Civic or the Blue one, that is a trick called making you “think past the sale” and the idea is to make you engage on the question of color as if you have already decided to buy the car. That is Persuasion 101 and I have seen no one in the media point it out when Trump does it.

“Think past the sale” is the same as the game technique known as “assume the sale“. The results of this form of persuasion/seduction are just as predictable: the customer/woman is groomed to believe he/she has already chosen your product/you.

The $10 billion estimate Trump uses for his own net worth is also an “anchor” in your mind. That’s another classic negotiation/persuasion method. I remember the $10 billion estimate because it is big and round and a bit outrageous. And he keeps repeating it because repetition is persuasion too.

I don’t remember the smaller estimates of Trump’s wealth that critics provided. But I certainly remember the $10 billion estimate from Trump himself. Thanks to this disparity in my memory, my mind automatically floats toward Trump’s anchor of $10 billion being my reality. That is classic persuasion. And I would be amazed if any of this is an accident. Remember, Trump literally wrote the book on this stuff.

Anchoring is another insidiously effective game technique. In seduction, anchoring is most effective when a good feeling or evoked emotion is purposefully coupled with a physical touch, so that the woman associates her positive state with her seducer’s presence.

You might be concerned that exaggerating ones net worth is like lying, and the public will not like a liar. But keep in mind that Trump’s value proposition is that he will “Make America Great.” In other words, he wants to bring the same sort of persuasion to the question of America’s reputation in the world. That concept sounds appealing to me. The nation needs good brand management, whether you think Trump is the right person or not.

In game parlance, “branding” is called “creating an identity”, which means adopting some sexy persona that appeals to women.

Trump also said he thinks Mexico should pay for the fence, which made most people scoff. But if your neighbor’s pit bull keeps escaping and eating your rosebushes, you tell the neighbor to pay for his own fence or you will shoot his dog next time you see it.

Scott Adams definitely reads Chateau Heartiste.

On a recent TV interview, the host (I forget who) tried to label Trump a “whiner.” But instead of denying the label, Trump embraced it and said was the best whiner of all time, and the country needs just that. That’s a psychological trick I call “taking the high ground” and I wrote about it in a recent blog post. The low ground in this case is the unimportant question of whether “whiner” is a fair label for Trump. But Trump cleverly took the high ground, embraced the label, and used it to set an anchor in your mind that he is the loudest voice for change. That’s some clown genius for you.

In game parlance, “taking the high ground” means “Agree&Amplify“. Donald F’ing Trump is a skilled Game practitioner. No wonder the women in his life are so beautiful and adore him so deeply.

When Trump raised his hand at the debate as the only person who would not pledge to back the eventual Republican candidate, he sent a message to the party that the only way they can win is by nominating him. And people like to win. It is in their nature.

Trump is a winner. This is why he bugs cuckservatives so much.

And what about Trump’s habit of bluster and self-complimenting? Every time he opens his mouth he is saying something about the Trump brand being fabulous or amazing or great. The rational part of your brain thinks this guy is an obnoxious, exaggerating braggart. But the subconscious parts of your brain (the parts that make most of your decisions) only remember that something about that guy was fabulous, amazing and great.

Game concept: DHVing (demonstrating higher value).

Now that Trump owns FOX, and I see how well his anchor trick works with the public, I’m going to predict he will be our next president.

I don’t know if we’ll have a President Trumpening (in’shallah), but if we do it’ll be because Trump has TIGHT GAME. And balls.

Now, if you can become president using game, imagine how much game could help you clean up with women!

Here’s Scott’s second essay on Trump’s power of persuasion.

My main point is that intellectual arguments lose to visual arguments and to powerful associations such as “America” and “great.” You think Trump is spouting calorie-free non-policies because he’s an idiot who hasn’t done his homework. The reality (as far as I can tell) is that he’s playing three-dimensional chess with two-dimensional opponents.

Beta spergs take note: you will never logically or intellectually stimulate a woman into bed. You have to learn to speak the language of hotnsexynsteamynsensual romance, which is, in fact, as learnable as any rule of logic inquiry.

***

Scott Walker is a niceguy who for the most part has his head on straight, compared to the rest of the cuckservative field. But he is weak. Listen to him feebly try to reason with some mud invader who wants the US to do nothing less than bend over and take his burrito up the keister.

Commenter “Original” writes,

Trump reframes children of illegal immigrants as: “It’s an issue of our countries policies encouraging this behavior.”

Here’s a more powerful reframe: “Anyone who breaks this country’s immigration laws for their own benefit is a delinquent. Shame on all illegals for breaking the law, but especially shame on all illegals who drag their children into their criminal activity.”

The anointed GOP contenders are weak. This is why they fail. And this is why Trump wins.

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The Sly “Game Contradictions” Troll

There is a relatively new class of troll who bears a striking resemblance to the well-known “concern troll”, but who is in some respects far more insidious in his methodology and ability to derail comment threads on blogs devoted to the teachings of the charisma arts. I call this new breed the “game contradictions troll”.

A classic example of the game contradictions troll is this comment by “The Shrike” (who may not necessarily be an insincere troll, but whose complaint nonetheless serves as an ideal representative of the sort of comment a game contradictions troll would leave).

A lot of sound advice in this post. It looks like the author is slowly shifting away from the unabashed, detached Lothario pose to a more conservative outlook on life. Conservative values are not my own, but it seems that this is a more consistent approach when it comes to the opinions often professed by the author and most of the commenters here. A recurrent theme is the impending collapse of the Western civilization, largely caused by female hypergamy. The majority seems to abhor the fact modern women ride the proverbial “cock-carousel”, seemingly forgetting that no amount of game would be effective against uptight prudes who only ever do it after marriage, and only to procreate.

Game contradictions trolls thrive on a studied ignorance or disavowal of the true fact of life that there are different standards for the sexes, and that these standards are not set by men, but by nature, and men merely conform to these sexual market standards and rationalize their fairness (or unfairness) when it suits them, (we are not a rational species, we are a rationalizing species).

No one on this board has claimed that female hypergamy is the prime cause of Western decline. Female hypergamy is one of those differing sexual market standards that apply to women and not to men, and that can’t be wished away. The assertion often made at CH is that female hypergamy is a real phenomenon, and it is best to accept the reality of it and MAKE IT WORK FOR YOU rather than shake your fist ineffectually at it in hopes women magically cure themselves of their evolved desire to mate with, and extract the commitment of, the highest status men that their looks can realistically afford.

Riding the cock carousel is NOT necessarily a manifestation of female hypergamy. The cock carousel is the consequence of socially atomized anonymous urban environments coupled with contraceptives and economic self-sufficiency providing cover and incentive for women to indulge the part of their sexuality that yearns for dominant, charming, jerkboy cads who are hard to pin down into committed relationships. This is not female hypergamy fulfilled, but female hypergamy THWARTED, as it is the Darwinian directive of every woman to land the most desirable alpha man and to KEEP HIM AROUND.

There is an interesting clash of contradicting attitudes here. Not arguments between different posters, but internally inconsistent opinions voiced by the same people. Game is still a hallowed topic, not to be touched with a mortal hand, but it runs counter to the otherwise conservative leanings of the commenters. A stable family-unit, also much cherished around here, is mutually exclusive to widespread promiscuity exemplified by men who “game” women, and women who are willing to play along.

Another category error made often and reliably by trolls and anti-game haters. “Game” is not synonymous with promiscuity, although game certainly aids the pursuit of promiscuity if that is what is desired. A man could just as easily use game — aka learned charisma — to meet, seduce, date, and when the time is right, marry the most beautiful oneitis he has ever laid eyes on. I wouldn’t recommend it, but there you go.

Ultimately, there is a choice to be made if a man is to be congruent at the most basic level. Either champion a virtuous society where loyalty matters a lot, and people pair up with the intention of forming serious relationships. Or support the cad lifestyle where jumping from one woman to the next without any consideration is the norm.

Men have a longer SMV window than women and bear a smaller cost for each act of copulation than do women, which means in practice each man can, and should, get some romantic experience under his belt (heh) and then marry, if he wishes to marry, a younger woman. The fact of biologically grounded sex differences which aren’t going anywhere means that cadding about is always going to be less psychologically, reproductively and emotionally expensive for men than slutting around will be for women.

If it’s the latter, then it’s difficult to blame women for trying to do the same.

First, most women aren’t interested in doing the same, despite transparently try-hard protestations to the contrary by fat, bitter feminists. Second, it’s not difficult to blame the women trying to emulate the lifestyle of the alpha male cad for their short-sightedness. Different sex-based standards in the sexual market, and different sex-based psychosexual temperaments, are an emergent fact of life, not a directive handed down by the invisible pimp hand of the patriarchy.

If it’s the former, then much of the game concept goes out the window, though some aspects of getting a chosen female interested presumably are still useful.

How about, “game gives men the tools to successfully attract and keep women in sexual and emotional relationships.” There. That’s not so hard now, is it?

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The Joy Of Game

I don’t think it gets told often enough here at Le Chateau, but Game, when executed with flair and precision, can be quite a joy to experience, both for the giver of Game and the receiver of Game. Reader Lichtof supplies an anecdote which demonstrates this truism about the crimson arts.

Girl at work – she’s 25..I’m 37..she had a history of not getting her timesheet in on time. This week she did

9.27 Me : Timesheet- boooooooo! Hiss!!
9.29 Her: Are you unhappy that its already done?
9.37 Me: Yes – now I can’t bug you
9.39 Her: LOL – I’ll try to slack off next time
9.42 Me: I can only handle predictability
9.43 Her: Gotta keep you on your toes!
9.45 Me: And there’s no beer left (in staff kitchen)
9.45 Her: I drank it all. Dark times here at (firm’s name)
9.55 Me: Not into dark beer but (bar name) has a grolsch – we will go sometime – wait haven’t I been here before?

Within minutes she was by my desk and 2 hours later asked me to lunch.

I bet you smiled reading this. A skilled seduction has an almost harmonic lilt to the ear. Flirtation is the poetic transmogrification of primitive desires. Notice, too, how a man with tight game energizes a woman, and summons the best of her; namely, her playfulness. A woman who is fortunate to be the lust object of a man with a nimble tongue and mischievous squint is a woman eager to relinquish her resting bitch face to the full flowering of her feminine soul.

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The Trumpening Puts The Heads Of His Enemies On Pikes And Shows You How To Be An Alpha Male

I’m beginning to think Donald Trump enjoys the company of so many beautiful women in his life because he has charisma and TIGHT GAME, as opposed to simply resting on his laurels and passively gathering gold-diggers with his wealth. The evidence for my belief keeps piling up.

This was Trump’s response after the debate in which unserious aggrocunt airhead Megyn Kelly tried to take him out with that stodgy Hivemind “war on women” shibboleth.

TRUMP: Well, I just don’t respect her as a journalist, I have no respect for her. I don’t think she’s very good, I think she’s highly overrated. But when I came out there, you know — what am I doing? I’m not getting paid for this. I go out there, and they start saying this stuff [garbled]. But you know, I didn’t know there’d be 24 million people. I knew it was going to be a big crowd because I get crowds, I get ratings. They call me the ratings machine. So I have, you know, she gets out and she starts asking me all sorts of ridiculous questions, and you could see there was blood coming out of her eyes, blood coming out of her … wherever. But in my opinion, she was off base.

Trump just reframed the misogyny accusation against him as a judgment on MegYn Kelly’s emotional instability. In verbal form, he titty-twisted her and then cracked some walnuts on her quivering manjaw.

You know what you didn’t hear in Trump’s reply? Prostrate Apologia. Cuckservatives, take note.

Trump has Game in spades.

Tks for link to Lemon interview.  He does some unprecedented things.  First, he runs the interview.  He rejects questions and re-directs: “None of your business; what do you care?”.  Lemon is actually forced to behave like an unbiased actor– he simply asks questions and hopes for answers (like an actual old school journalist as opposed to narrator).  To his credit, Trump rewards him with answers– when he chooses.  Second, he aims at his enemies’ greatest weakness– their stature.  Will is ‘dour’– Krauthammer has an agenda.  Megyn Kelly is a lightweight.  Chris Wallace is a pale imitation of his father.  Deadly stuff that destroys the credibility of these people is a way they’ve never before encountered.  What he says about Luntz is both believable and devastating– he destroys the man and his whole pathetic business model. He’s ripped down the facade in a way Gingrich only experimented with in 2012.

“Re-directs” means, in Game lingo, “reframes”. Trump is a master at putting all his antagonists in the defensive crouch, where pussy tingles and pussboy deference are born.

Meanwhile. cur-cuckservative Erick Erickson, fat and womanly to the bone, disinvited Trump from his circle jerk of cabana goys. You see, for the typical cuckservative, nursing their oneitis for sexually unavailable masculine lawyercunts is a reflex they can’t control, like flopping on their back and exposing their underbellies for the teeth and claws of their betters.

No worries, though. Trump’s game is multi-purpose, useful for marrying a string of leggy blondes and for smashing uppity shitlibs. Freelancer Skarp Hedin agrees that Trump has Game.

The guy has done it. He walked right through the War on Women canard. I am ashamed I doubted him. And not only that he took off on the losers by calling them “deviant(s)” which is the perfect description for the Cultural Left. They are sexually and morally and intellectually deviant: tearing down the family, the Churches and the culture.

May The Trumpenkrieg grind them wailing into the dust.

Mr. Trump made Megyn Kelly look really bad — she was a mess with her anger and totally caught off guard. Mr. Trump said “blood was coming out of her eyes and whatever” meaning nose, but wanted to move on to more important topics. Only a deviant would think anything else. This related to the debate, which because of Mr. Trump had 24 million viewers — the biggest in cable news history. According to TIME, Newsmax, Drudge Report, The New York Times, The Washington Post, The Hill and many others, Mr. Trump won the debate. By the way, the guy (Erick Erickson) who made the decision about RedState called Supreme Court Justice David Souter a “goat [expletive] child molester” and First Lady Michelle Obama a “Marxist Harpy.” He was forced to make a humbling apology. Also, not only is Erick a total loser, he has a history of supporting establishment losers in failed campaigns so it is an honor to be uninvited from his event. Mr. Trump is an outsider and does not fit his agenda. Many of the 900 people that wanted to hear Mr. Trump speak tonight have been calling and emailing—they are very angry at Erickson and the others that are trying to be so politically correct. To them Mr. Trump says, “We will catch you at another time soon.”

Read more at: http://www.nationalreview.com/corner/422272/trump-hits-back-only-deviant-would-think-anything-else-alexis-levinson

And THIS! “We will catch you at another time soon.” Is one of the great English sentences. It is a promise to his friends and an ominous warning to his enemies. It also breaks out of the stagnant grammar of the elite and cuts right to the motherfucking chase.

I think that might be the most refreshing thing about Trump: he is ok with enemy/foe relationships.

“I hate like the gates of Hades the man who says one thing and holds another in his heart.” Achilles Iliad 9.314.

To hate your enemies is as natural as to love your friends. Trump is doing things no cuckservative shitheel has done in ages: He is drawing battle lines, and proudly putting his enemies on notice. This is why he polls so high. The nation yearns for a leader with a pair. It’s been too long since the people’s representative was anything other than a soundbite dribbling, deflated scrote.

Trump does not back down when the Hivemind swarms. There’s another lesson there for the mass of sniveling beta males.

“For all of the people who were looking forward to Mr. Trump coming, we will miss you,” [Trump’s] campaign said. “Blame Erick Erickson, your weak and pathetic leader.”

Trump is wielding the shiv like a surgeon. Hell, the guy has a claymore he swings to hew faint-hearted pajama boys in two when he wants to add dramatic flourish. The Trumpening is a beautiful thing to behold. I hope it lasts.

PS You think there isn’t a cabal of oligarchs quaking in their peep-toes over Trump? Big Donors Ordered GOP Candidates Before Debate: Take Out Trump.

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A Condom Conundrum: A Judgement Of Your Game

200+ comments from readers eager to take on the latest “Test of Your Game” challenge, and it is yer ‘umble shiv-sharpener’s duly considered opinion that many excellent responses (and some awful ones, for flavor) were offered up for Chateau judgement.

Recall the parameters:

Need game advice. Buying condoms. Cashier is very cute hard 8. Buying only condoms because I have a sex life and do, in fact, need them. But could always use more plates. I’m 40; she’s 26.

What is my funny opener to the sales clerk ringing up my condoms?

Store is nearly empty. Would be easy to chat her up. Ask her to come help me try them out? Just say “come get coffee with me on your break”? Also I live 3 minutes from here. She’d get the benefit of three orgasms if she’s lucky enough to come with me to my pad.

Box o’ condoms. Cute, younger cashier. Near-vacant store. Favorable logistics. What do you do?

da GBFM lzzzzzzzzlzlz™ takes a whack at it.

true story:

DA GBFM: does u have two dozen extra magnum magna cum ladue XXXL condomsz? and a phone numberz?

lzozozozolozozooz

Direct, confident, funny… and unlikely to succeed. But it will provide great entertainment for anyone who happens to be waiting next in line at the register.

condom rating: 3 out of 5 standard issue trojans.

***

Anonymous writes,

ALWAYS make a pickup/number attempt. “Here, put your number in my iPhag.” Then test it to make sure that she didn’t give you a fake number.

If you actually say the word “iPhag”, your game is Winning.

condom rating: 3 out of 5 ribbed for her pleasure.

***

cukn fapn goes for the funny bone,

“Excuse me, where’s the fitting room?”

There’s a good chance she’ll laugh, and if she’s laughing, her vagina is presenting.

condom rating: 4 out of 5 pig bladder rubbers.

***

Oberyn Martell, another comedian,

*Drop condoms*

“If this doesn’t work out, you happen to be a sitter on the side?”

The dumber girls might not get this right away.

condom rating: 2 out of 5 red and green seasonal specials.

***

walawala gets risque,

“I’m just on my way to a kids party, I blow them up and make animals out of them…”

When she starts laughing say…I’m a magician I could use an assistant…

Take it from there.

This is the first serious attempt at converting the humorous opener into a pickup segue. Very good. Downside: As another commenter mentioned, associating kids with condoms could backfire.

condom rating: 5 out of 5 rosemary-scented Yankee condoms.

***

Jack H goes balls to the wall,

Rip the flap off the box and tell her to write her number on it.

This would take some brass ones, but there’s potential. You don’t even have to wait for an indicator of attraction from her. A routine like this would surprise and intrigue her instantly.

condom rating: 5 out of 5 warming sheaths.

***

Tittysac McGee remembers that sometimes the best game is the least expected game.

While sporting shit eating grin:

Do you have these in extra small?

Clownish self-deprecation can work wonders in some situations.

Condom rating: 3 out of 5 extra large.

***

“N” opens a line of communication to the female hindbrain,

Buy like four packs and confess that you were just released from prison.

Heh. A depressing number of girls will bite on this.

condom rating: 5 out of 5 ex-con edition condoms (XL reservoir tip)

***

shartiste grounds everyone reading this,

Opening with any kind of joke or reference to the condoms might sound funny in an internet comment section but comes off as a bit try hard and corny IRL.

Just game as usual and let the condoms give some built in sexual tension.

This is the sensible approach suited for the average beta male. Running regular game against an unspoken backdrop of a box of condoms is not only funny, it’s tension-building.

condom rating: 3 out of 5 two-ply baby-stoppers.

***

Benny Profane, living up to his name,

Put condoms on counter. Maintain direct eye contact while taking a dump on floor.

I laughed. She won’t.

condom rating: 0 out of 5 rubbers with poked holes.

***

Who says you need to speak? asylum writes,

Say nothing and smile with your best James Bond smirk.
Laconic = winner
I presume you shop there often, so you’ll see her again, and she will remember you.

Just don’t break that smirk or that eye contact prematurely in a fit of giggles, or the jig is up.

condom rating: 4 out of 5 silent sausage sheaths.

***

Fredrik, on subliminal seduction,

Ask hows her evening is and make small talk while buying the condoms, then after the condoms are purchased while holding the condoms in your hand ask her if shes free tonight? and tell her that she seems like a cool person.Make eye contact all the time and tap the condom packet like a slow beat into the palm of your other hand while asking.

Note: No need for jokes here, simply ask her out with the condoms in hand. Thats more than funny enough, but you have to have very high self esteem to pull it off in the correct charming way. You have to send of the signal that you are serious, but at the same time you obviously have great humour and confidence. I like my comment so much I might in fact go and try this out for myself.

If you have the acting class chops to pull this off, I could easily see the girl slowly grinning and asking what your deal is. Then the road is wide open.

condom rating: 5 out of 5 nuclear tipped pocket rocket protectors.

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