Asshole Game Week: In Pickup Games, Offense Wins Every Time

Asshole Game Week: Day One is here. Day Two here. Day Three here.

Pijama Wearing Ninja provides a clinic on how to pick up sexy girls at the gym with nothing but a devil-may-care recklessness and a honed talent for segueing every subject into one with sexual overtones.

I went to the gym today and the only girl in there with both a cute face and body was doing squats and I complimented her on not being a cardio girl and told her that soon she will squat as much as me. We talked about guys who don’t train legs for a minute and how they’re the equivalent of cardio girls in the gym. She asked me what happened to me (as in to my knee) and I told her penis reduction surgery. She laughed and asked me why is my scar on my knee then and I told her that the surgeon was very clumsy. She giggled so I told her that I don’t like girls who laugh at injured people. I told her I have to go and told her my name and she told me hers and extended her hand and I told her that she probably has calloused hands from all the squatting so kissed her cheek and took her number.

That was… fuckin poetry. There’s a lot going on. Let’s unpack it.

PWN’s opener is at once a fronthanded and a backhanded compliment. congrats for eschewing cardio in favor of squats… oh and soon you will have legs like strong masculine man.

He moves into humorously DLVing his competition. (this is pua jargon for “tearing other guys down”).

Then there’s his refusal to give a straight answer, opting instead for the flirty, sexualized tease of “penis reduction surgery”. (Beta males are notoriously bad at answering women’s questions with anything but logical, tingle-killing coherence.)

He punches up his momentum with a sterling disqualification: “I don’t like girls who laugh at injured people.” Push-pull is the metronome of seduction.

He exits the conversation first, but not before delivering a final, asshole-caliber taunt: “I told her she probably has calloused hands from all the squatting.”

And then, of course, the physical escalation at the end is a move no non-asshole would dare attempt.

PWN follows up:

I think I’ll invite her for some minigolf this weekend or next week and the loser would have to buy the winner an alcoholic drink of their choosing*. Mine will be a glass of wine. I like good wines so that will also give me something to DHV with and girls love wine. The minigolf place is really close to a winebar and both are 20 minutes away of walking from my place, which has a pretty good skyline. Too bad it’s winter and I can’t just have a walk with her due to the cold and the skyline will be blocked by the fog. FUCK WINTER!

Pickup during winter is probably the lamest, especially if the girls will bond to you and expect gifts on Valentines, another similar day we have here, 1st of March and 8th of March. Back in the days of abundance, I always fought with my girls on purpose and rekindled or found new ones after this month of financial carnage. I seriously prefer buying my mother lots of flowers than wasting my money on silly tarts. lol

*used to teach girls if I was beating them really bad, which was good excuse to kino. Rusty now so not sure I’ll get to do it.

What kind of man but an asshole would deliberately fight with girlfriends as a con to get out of buying V-Day gifts and dinners?

By Asshole Game standards, PWN’s gym pickup marginally qualifies, but inclusion into the world of sexxxy assssssholes is relative to the competition. The marching mass of mediocrities known affectionately as beta males wouldn’t talk this way to a girl even in their Casanova-conjuring dreams. And that is why they fail.

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Asshole Game Week: Slip Out The Back, Jack

Asshole Game Week: Day One is here. Day Two here.

What happens when you totally bail on a woman? She fumes and refuses to ever talk to you again? She waves off the thought of you with a dismissive mental gesture? Or… something else?

Commenter Hosswire writes,

About a year ago, after voraciously clicking through all of the glorious Chateau’s game posts I decided to up my asshole game with a hot 20-something (I’m 41) half-black acrobat (blackrobat) chick I had just won over with my new arrogant & sexually entitled persona.

This reads like the voice-over intro to a Swingers-esque indie flic.

At that time, I had seen enough results to know that CH precepts were effective, though felt like there were levels of assholeness that created counterproductive results. So I was, like, 95% convinced.

There are levels of assholery that can be counterproductive, and this is in large part contextual. More desperate older, uglier or chubbier women will wilt under the kind of sustained asshole attack that would send a younger, hotter, tighter woman into an upward spiral of horny delirium.

Anyway. This chick was part of an aerial acrobatic (Cirque de Soleil shit) school & invited me to her Winter show. Bought me tickets, introduced me to her friends, made a big production out of it.

Halfway through the show, for no other reason than to be a dick, I got up & walked out.

Twenty minutes later, I got a text:

Her: Did you really leave?

I waited a good 10-15 minutes before replying.

Me: Meeting some friends for drinks

Note the lack of apology or excuse. If you’re gonna play the asshole game, you’ve got to appear comfortable with your rule-breaking mystique. Don’t flinch!

Three minutes later, I realized that it was literally impossible to be too big an asshole for women when I got this text:

Her: When are you going to be home? I am going to rock your world tonight.

That night, with the help of some coconut oil from my kitchen I experienced every orifice of that dusky beauty. Color me 100% convinced now. Asshole game works.

Topically administered medium-chain triglyceride sex is the healthy alternative.

I wouldn’t infer too much about the effectiveness of asshole game from the biracial nature of the lead temptress. I’ll have a post related to the race-asshole game nexus soon but, in short, although there is reason to think a Rushtonian “Rule of Three” governs the receptiveness of women from different races to asshole game, I’ve found that there are attenuating variables that work against a broad racial disposition.

For instance, the white men in upscale WM-BW couples are often very beta-ish, or at least not at all like the wiggers you’d expect. I suspect that the higher class black women willing to date outside their race are the sort of women craving a dependable, faithful provider, and are therefore less likely than their sun-baked sistren to require the courtship equivalent of a crotch grab to grab their attention.

A more pertinent factor is the degree of femininity of the biracial beauty. It’s a good bet that a half-black acrobat is out on the far right side of the black woman bell curve for slenderness and femininity, and, if my experience and SCIENCE tell us something, it’s that young, highly feminine women of any race tend to be the most receptive to asshole game. So, if this “blackrobat” loves her assholes, it’s probably less a consequence of her racial pedigree than it is of her femininity.

PS I don’t know Hosswire’s race (his tone suggests non-black), but whatever it is, it wouldn’t much alter my analysis.

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Asshole Game Week: Jerkitude Under Pressure

Asshole Game Week: Day One is here.

Reader ‘Hackett To Bits’ summons the animating spirit of the Olympian god Prickicissus.

It feels good to find that different reality.

Me: 45 yo, (amicably) divorced
She: 23 yo waif/neurotic in the booty call zone

Some grousers are gonna say, “well, she isn’t interested in a relationship”, conveniently missing the point that hot booty call sex with a 23yo kitten beats the stuffing out of stuffing an aging beauty with relationship glue. Also missing the point that to get to a relationship, it helps to first be fucking the girl.

Recent text chat snippet:

Me: No one can resist jerk man
She: You’re not that cute.
Me: Doesn’t matter, jerk man doesn’t need to be
She: You’re overly confident and full of yourself
Me: Aww shucks
She: Point proven
Me: (emoticon wearing shades)

NO ONE has ever called me ‘overly confident’ before…oh I’m feeling it now.

You should be. Chicks dig overconfident men who act pleased as punch with themselves.

There are a lot of game concepts in play here. There’s the avoidance of defensiveness. “Doesn’t matter, jerk man doesn’t need to be” Agree&Amplify. “Aww shucks” And emoji game.

In a few short texts, Hackett conveyed a master class in jerkboy charisma game. This is the kind of uncaring asshole teasing that hot young women hungrily lap up. It’s not indicative of the extremes in assholery that a man can achieve, but it is within the sphere of behavior that characterizes smug prickitude, which is so tantalizing and arousing to women.

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Asshole Game Week: Replacement Therapy

Welcome to Asshole Game Week, the evil twin of Relationship Game Week, in which Tales of Tingles Torqued are told as a lesson for the benighted. A warning to those who are faint of heart or tiny of testicle: This would be a good week to avoid visits to the Chateau. Buzzfeeder bromides and self-fellating Millennial feels are only one short click away for you!

Reader Reservoir Tip fires a brood-blocked, hamster-shocked, money shot to start off the celebrations for this week-long pagan holiday:

Funny story for you all:

Last night, I ended up in a little bit of a dilemma. I had two girls scheduled to come over at the same time, mainly because I was expecting one of them to flake. To my surprise, she didn’t.

I thought about bringing them both in and trying for the threesome, but decided against it. As girl one walks into my place, girl two texts me saying she’s arrived. I text girl two back and tell her that “the shit hit the fan” and that I can’t join her tonight. She’s pissed, and rightly so, really. What I pulled was pretty low, and definitely rude.

Nothing puts a lady in the mood like innuendo rude of a woman number two.

Regardless, I’m sitting around with girl one, doing a simple movie at my place, but she ends up being kind of a bitch, and we split after about an hour and a make out.

I text girl two back, “hey come over now.”

She comes right over and i boink her.

If your value is high enough, and the girl is horny enough, she’ll do anything, apparently.

Asshole dicktum #1: Always keep two in the kitty.

Asshole dicktum #2: Don’t apologize for being an asshole.

Asshole dicktum #3: Chicks dig a man with options, especially options that are intriguingly implied.

Asshole dicktum #4: Few women can resist a man with a well-honed sexual entitlement complex.

Asshole dicktum #5: Act like a high value man, and women will believe you’re a high value man.

Tomorrow: Increase the voltage.

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The Third Beta Bait Type: The “Bad Boyfriend” Ploy

Beta Bait is an important game concept first elucidated here at CH. Beta Bait is a psy ops gambit deployed by women to “trap” men into doing or saying something that indicates a beta male mentality (i.e., a scarcity mentality). It’s basically a male status ascertainment algorithm.

Beta Bait is similar to the classic shit test, but with notable distinctions.

Shit tests occur with the most regularity and intensity during early game, and at times when the relationship is on the skids. They are normally loaded up front to help the girl quickly take the measure of your alphaness. Beta bait happens at any time while dating a girl, (or even when not dating a girl, say, while languishing in her orbit as a sex-denied friendzone chump), and are spread out evenly in a relationship as a sort of low level boyfriend diagnosis script.

Shit tests are more obvious than beta bait, and thus easier to pass for men with excellent awareness of female hypergamy tactics. A shit test can be quite bold and shocking to newb ears and thus scare off lesser men, but the inveterate player always operates with the frame that shit tests and other assorted confusing and bitchy female behavior are an opportunity rather than an obstacle to demonstrate his mate value. A girl who is giving you shit is a hell of a lot closer to sex with you than a girl who is indifferent to your existence.

Of the two, beta bait is by far more dangerous than shit tests. If you fail a shit test, you move on to the next girl within your field of view. Your pain is over quickly and time is saved for mining new whore. But beta bait is subtler and more insidious; you may not even recognize you’re being baited until she’s screaming “HALF!” and the kid suddenly doesn’t look like you anymore.

In short, shit tests are what women do when they feel attracted to you and don’t know how to properly deal with their growing feelings of desire. Beta bait is what women do when they are feeling LESS attracted to you (or not attracted at all), and are actively seeking ways to verify that you are indeed the beta male they love to loathe and despise.

It’s a crucial distinction, because beta bait tends to sneak up on a man and slowly erode his self-confidence and his all-important alpha male status, while shit tests are direct and thus, theoretically at least, instantly manageable.

So we come to what I regard as one of the three most invidious, and frequently encountered, beta bait schemes women love to surprise buttsecks on men.

The first two beta bait evil schemes are:

1. Incongruent sex talk.

If a girl broaches sexual topics too soon, and with a cocky air of bawdiness, it could be beta bait. A beta male will practically glow with excitement and curiosity when a girl he likes sexually supercharges their conversation. If this is you, DON’T TAKE THE BAIT. A little push-off now goes a long way toward a lot of pull-in later.

2. Fishing for flattery.

Beware girls fishing for flattery. If you give it to them, they will not come.

Which brings us to the topic of this post:

Beta Bait Scheme #3: The “Bad Boyfriend” Ploy.

The BBP is beta bait for the long haul. This is the kind of “smoke out the beta male” game that women will play for months and years, if they feel it necessary.

You’ll know it’s happening when your woman nags you about being a better boyfriend. Often, the form it takes is a woman acting irate about her boyfriend “cheating in his heart”, or not investing enough in the relationship, or just generally failing her outrageous expectations in one or multiple ways.

Here be the rub. She doesn’t actually think you’re a bad boyfriend. She thinks you’re a beta boyfriend. So her BBP dramafest is really a self-gratifying acting class to alleviate her guilt for feeling bored and out of love and wanting to break up. Naturally, most beta boyfriends will take this as a serious charge against their character, and work overtime to appease their nagging girlfriends, which will only make their women despise them more.

The right and proper response to a BBP attack is amused dismissiveness, seasoned with a bit of the ol’ dread game. Remember, if you really are a bad boyfriend (aka an alpha male with unfulfilled options), your girlfriend won’t react to that by nagging you; instead, she’ll react by trying harder HERSELF to please YOU. Plush quislings get nagged. Bad boyfriends get hot sex because their women hope that’ll soften them a little.

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Secret Society News: There Are More Sluts Than Surveys Say

Animatronic host society leech Bryan Caplan took a break from spreading the ass cheeks of his nation to report on GSS survey data indicating that monogamy remains the norm among Americans.

The problem with sex surveys of this sort — i.e., the kind that ask in no uncertain terms just how slutty (women) or charming (men) you are — is that people lie. They lie to assuage their egos, and they lie to meet social expectations. And lo and behold, there are attenuating studies which discredit to some extent the reported results of sex surveys. This one, for instance, found that:

Men report more permissive sexual attitudes and behavior than do women. This experiment tested whether these differences might result from false accommodation to gender norms (distorted reporting consistent with gender stereotypes). Participants completed questionnaires under three conditions. Sex differences in self‐reported sexual behavior were negligible in a bogus pipeline condition in which participants believed lying could be detected, moderate in an anonymous condition, and greatest in an exposure threat condition in which the experimenter could potentially view participants’ responses. This pattern was clearest for behaviors considered less acceptable for women than men (e.g., masturbation, exposure to hardcore & softcore erotica). Results suggest that some sex differences in self‐reported sexual behavior reflect responses influenced by normative expectations for men and women.

Men overstate their number of partners to a small degree, and women understate their number of partners to a large degree.

Two anti-Hivemind (or pro-Red Pill, if you wish) conclusions can be drawn from this very special insight about human nature:

1. On the subject of sex, women are bigger liars than men.

2. There are more slutty women running around in the world than sexually parched betaboys think.

I’d add that, despite the above GrateFacts, it’s a good bet that lower-N count monogamy is still hanging on as the norm among Eurasian peoples. Well, serial monogamy, at any rate.

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The Reverse Cockblock

While reading an article at ROK about taking the Grease Pill and letting your hair go native sans shampooing, a tangent by the author, Samseau, grabbed my attention.

Then I went to the men’s room and took a leak. When the girls I came with asked me where I had been, I told them “there was a line” and she asked me if I had any weed, which I did, but the fat friend did a reverse cockblock* out on the street and prevented her from going anywhere else with me. […]

* Reverse Cockblock: “Oh, you know what? Just go home with him. You should go. Have a good time. Just go. I don’t care.” <—- Most effective cockblock line in the world. Even if she goes home with you, she’ll still feel like a slut as soon as you make a move on her and the LMR [ed: last minute resistance] will be insurmountable.

The Reverse Cockblock, or what is more precisely termed the Reverse Psychology Cockblock, is something most men will rarely encounter. I’ve never heard that sort of line from a cockblock, and I’ve had to deal with more than my fair share of spiteful CBs maneuvering to deep-six my romantic fortunes.

The typical cockblock will work her black magic in one of three ways:

1. She’ll pout along the perimeter and look really pathetic, until the hot friend you’re chatting up can’t help but notice her fat friend’s distress. Game over.

2. She’ll bulldoze her way into your conversation, gripping her friend by the arm, and dragging her out the door while shouting about this or that bar they have to go to, and yelling “BYEEEEE” at you through a shit-eating grin as she exits with her quarry helplessly entangled. Game over.

3. She’ll make a complete bitch of herself, executing increasingly labyrinthine and complex shit tests designed to publicly humiliate you until her hot friend becomes disenchanted with your feebleness while under attack. GAME OVER, MAAAN.

There are a vast array of cockblock strategies, but the three above will account for 80% of your CB victimizations. Exceptions abound, but you’ll be well-covered if you know how to handle those three.

But… WOW JUST WOW… the passive-aggressive Reverse Cockblock is quite devious. I’d have to tip my atheist goon fedora to a chubster who successfully pulled off a reverse psychology cockblock on me. Truly evil. What the RCB is doing is essentially activating her hot friend’s ASD (anti-slut defenses) in your stead. She’s co-opted betaboy anti-game and turned it into a girl game victory.

So here are my anti-RCB solutions, should this pure evil alight upon your Valalpha.

– Agree & Amplify

“Oh, you know what? Just go home with him. You should go. Have a good time. Just go. I don’t care.”

“We will, thanks! It’s so nice of you to want the best for your friend. I hope she doesn’t break my heart.”

– Re-Reverse Psychology

“Oh, you know what? Just go home with him. You should go. Have a good time. Just go. I don’t care.”

[to cockblock]: “Don’t worry, I was just about to hand her over to you. You look like more fun anyhow.”

– Jerkboy Ridicule

“Oh, you know what? Just go home with him. You should go. Have a good time. Just go. I don’t care.”

[to CB]: “Don’t feel left out. You can join too.”

– Flay Her Alive

“Oh, you know what? Just go home with him. You should go. Have a good time. Just go. I don’t care.”

[to target, whispering]: “I think your friend needs you right now more than I do.”

***

I hope this game advice helps more men bed the women they really want to bed, and to have the freedom to choose which among those quality women will be honored with a long-term commitment and eventual progeny.

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