The Easiest Way To Revive A Flagging Relationship

Beta backsliding is a fact of life. Even the hardest alphas will occasionally show flashes of humanity that rev their women’s shit testing engines. Most of these moments are brief and dismissible, but woe to the man who can’t recognize his embetafying ineptitude; he will slowly lose dominant control of his relationships until one day he’s so scared of his woman that he believes her when she says she’ll leave him if he goes through with a paternity test.

When you become experienced with women your alert system for beta backsliding is so honed that you can tell within seconds of your woman pulling away from you which of your behaviors was the cause. When your awareness of the sexual matrix is fully advanced, you will even be able to tell with frightening accuracy how your woman will react to your behavior *before she has reacted*. Like aural bullets of shit tests flying at you from all directions, your Neo Game will slow time and warp space, stopping her shit tests in front of you, which you then send right back at her with double the force. A master of female psychology (MFP) is indistinguishable from a clairvoyant, predicting women’s actions before they have happened based on nothing more than a well-developed understanding of a woman’s animal nature.

The day will come when you get so good at this that you will throw beta chum in the water just to amuse yourself with her predictable response, in much the same way women amuse themselves by wrapping lesser men around their fingers with ostentatious displays of cleavage or flirty signals of sexual interest.

Which brings us to our question: What does a man do when he has lost the upper hand and his relationship is on the fast track to fail if he doesn’t take steps to arrest it? First, he must assess what led him to his predicament. Did he hug her too tightly in public? Did he make kissy face with her in front of other men? Did he nestle his head in her lap? Did he say “sorry”? Did he cry after sex? Did he do all of these things plus tell her she’s beautiful? If so, then he shouldn’t be surprised if she complains about his PDA, or moans about spending too much time together.

When a woman pulls back, a typical man’s instinct will be to try and fix his flagging relationship. Men do; that’s how we’re designed. Unfortunately, more often than not this male instinct to action will drive the nails into the coffin of his dying relationship. Most men overreact, either in the beta direction or the alpha direction. A beta will coo and pout and swarm with rays of undying love until his woman is repulsed and leaves him with her heart light and unburdened. An alpha will control and demean and lash out like an angry tyrant until his woman falls into the arms of a more charming man.

I have a better way. My advice is so simple that any man — from alpha to omega — can follow it with success. It’s this:

The easiest way to revive a flagging relationship is to cut off all contact.

That’s it. No routines to memorize, no alpha body language to learn, no reframing required; just one simple solution: Cut off all contact. No phone calls, no texts, no emails, no midnight drive-bys at her apartment. Nothing until she reinitiates contact with you.

And I guarantee that nine out of ten times she *will* reinitiate contact. Women cannot resist chasing a man who has made himself unavailable. The disappearing act is every man’s ace in the hole; women are nearly powerless to it. They have no defense. All it requires of the man is willpower. If you find it hard to be away from your woman’s pussy for more than a day, then you will have to find substitutes while in the No Contact Zone. A man on top of his game will have other women to service him. Lesser men will need to turn to porn or hookers. Or eat a lot of tofu and lick plastic bottles to lower his testosterone.

Depending on length of relationship and severity of the man’s beta offense, the No Contact Zone can last anywhere from a couple of days to a month. The beauty of this solution to revive a dying relationship is that even those rare times when she does not reinitiate contact you will have saved yourself time and energy dating a woman who was likely to dump you soon anyhow. And on the flimsiest pretext, like getting a smile from a high status bike messenger.

Note that I did not say this is the *best* method for rescuing a relationship on the rocks. I said it was the easiest method with the highest return for the minimal investment. If you’re a busy guy who can’t be bothered to run expert level effortless-seeming game, or if you’re a recovering beta who isn’t yet confident enough in his LTR game to risk a more proactive approach to a dying LTR, then the No Contact Zone is for you.

There’s one other thing you must know. If you don’t do this final step the right way then your No Contact Zone game will be for naught. Assuming she reinitiates contact (and she likely will), expect her to say something like this:

“Hey there! Haven’t heard from you in a while. What have you been up to?”

If your No Contact Zone game hit the mark, you will detect a hint of nervousness in her voice. Congratulations, sir, you have regained hand. BUT… you can lose it all if you in any way ACKNOWLEDGE the No Contact ruse. Like Fight Club, the first rule is to not talk about it. That means you act as if NOTHING IS UNUSUAL about your calculated time away from her.

“Hey, what’s up! Eh you know, the usual stuff, work, life. Did I tell you about my new hobby? Single malt scotch… oh yeeeah.”

This will, naturally, drive her mentally insane. Fitfully for us men, mental insanity in women triggers seismic gina tremors. She will invite herself over for (in her mind) make up sex. Your job is to step aside and let the hamster in her head spin itself to exhaustion as you fornicate to the wee hours.

One more thing. If she presses you on your absence, say by asking “Why haven’t you called me?”, you deny complicity in her frame. In other words, don’t allow yourself to get entrapped by her frame by answering defensively. Either deny her accusation (“You’re very forgetful. I called you a few days ago.”) or reframe the conversation to a focus on her clinginess (“I didn’t know I was supposed to call you every single second of the day. Aw, it’s cute that you think about me so much. Adorable!”)

Played right, No Contact Zone game is absolutely devastating to a woman’s sense of relationship entitlement and her bloated hypergamous ego.

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Anti-Player Counterinsurgency: Game For Women

Reproduction is a biological arms race. Did you think women would just lie down as more and more players plunder their goods? Well, yes, they would, but they will also respond with anti-player counterinsurgency tactics, because it is the subconscious algorithm of women to make it as difficult as possible for men to get up their skirts. Reader “Dr Love” pointed me to a couple of Huffington Post articles by “dating and relationship coach” Jag Carrao (only in a nation wheezing its last breaths could a person find a successful career as a dating and relationship coach) where she offers rules for women on how to successfully thwart any game that men run on them.

Since we will be seeing more of this sort of thing in the coming years from self-styled “Rules Girls”, and because I am a man of tremendous magnanimity and nobleness of spirit, I’ve decided to get a jump start and give you the tools you’ll need to fend off women’s counterinsurgencies to your game. Call it anti-anti-player game.

In her first article, Jag Carrao suggests ways for women to avoid common female dating mistakes that keep them going back again and again into the arms of badboys and assholes. (In womanspeak, “dating mistake” means anything that helps the man get the bang).

Dating Mistake #1:  Approaching Him First.

Quick Fix:  If you talked to him first or even asked him out, you can try to restore some of the feminine mystique you forfeited as the initiator by being a bit more elusive – a little less available, a little more mysterious.

Anti-Anti-Player Solution: Double down. When she waits a day to return your call, you wait two days to return hers. When she cancels a date, you cancel two. Or you cancel an even bigger, better date that she was looking forward to. A player understands that women like to maintain an air of mystery and coyness, but he also understands that the world is full of women. His abundance mentality ensures that no woman remains elusive with him for long.

Dating Mistake #2: Acting overly chummy.

Quick Fix:  Recognize that the more you talk about yourself, the less you’ll be listening and observing whether he is right for you.  Identify why you feel the need to yammer on — nervousness, low tolerance for awkward silences, desire to impress with witty banter and accomplishments – and remember that you are not there to audition, but to relax and have a good time.

Anti-Anti-Player Solution: As any reader of my blog knows by now, seduction is in large part a simple flipping of the male-female mating script. You *want* women to feel like they have to audition for your favor. If she clams up in order to get you to reveal more about yourself, continue framing the conversation in such a way that she is coaxed into dropping important details about herself. This is when the art of qualifying is put to best use.

Dating Mistake #3:  Accepting last minute dates. 

Quick Fix:  To make sure you’re his “Plan A” girl (not the “Plan B” girl he calls after his first choice turns him down), I recommend setting a firm cut-off limit after which you’re “busy” – period.

Anti-Anti-Player Solution: The seasoned player avoids any issues associated with the timing of scheduling dates by taking the girl home the night they meet. Not everyone is a seasoned player, though, so calls and arrangements will have to be made. I don’t have a problem with calling girls a few days ahead to schedule a date, as long as you don’t leave the impression that your schedule is wide open. For example, if it’s a Monday when you call her, and you schedule a date for Thursday, don’t offer another day that same week if she can’t make it happen on Thursday. Just tell her you’ll be in touch and see if you two can get together some other time, then. Ambivalence makes the heart grow fonder.

Dating Mistake #4: Jumping into a “whirlwind romance.”

Quick Fix:  You need to start pacing the relationship.   Don’t see him more than once or twice a week, don’t talk more than ten minutes on the phone, don’t open up too fast, or introduce him to your friends before he introduces you to his.  If he absolutely must see you every day, 24-hours-a-day, there’s this arrangement called marriage…..let him figure it out!

Anti-Anti-Player Solution: This one is simple. Three date rule. If she isn’t putting out — or giving clear indications that she’s well on the way to putting out — by the third date, her attraction for you isn’t strong enough for you to invest much more energy or time in her. Or she’s a repressed prude. Either way, the last thing a player wants is a woman who controls the pace of dispensing her sexual favors. If you sense she’s dragging her feet by date three, the best countertactic is to cancel date four. Any plausible excuse will work. Instill the fear of loss into her and watch as her practiced restraint melts away.

Also, any man who wants to see a girl every day, 24 hours a day, is not likely to get into any whirlwind romance because women aren’t attracted to clingy betas.

Dating Mistake #5: Wasting Time.

Quick Fix:  Know what you want – and believe you deserve it.  If you want to get married but the guy you’ve been dating for over a year still isn’t sure, set a time limit of how long you’re willing to wait then stick to it.  Once D-Day (decision day) arrives, and he’s still waffling, then move on and do not look back (if he’s ever going to know and man up to a proposal, this will be your best – and his last – chance).

Anti-Anti-Player Solution: This is good advice for women (after all, women’s dating market value is much shorter lived than men’s) but it has almost zero chance of being heeded, so the player need not worry too much about neutralizing the marriage ultimatum. When a woman loves you, and you don’t give her blatant reasons to bolt, the hardest thing in the world for her to do is to walk away from you on account of an abstract principle such as years remaining to sexual expiration. But in the rare case it does happen, remember: Marriage is no insurance against her leaving you; all it does is buy you a few extra years of arid emotional investment from a woman who is calculatingly capable of issuing, and abiding, relationship ultimatums. What *is* an insurance policy against her leaving you? Her love.

In Jag Carrao’s second article, she continues the theme of rules for women to avoid becoming a player’s next lover. Leave it to a “dating and relationship coach” to counsel the virtues of anti-pleasure.

1) The “play to lay” game. This is where he pretends to care about you more than he actually does at the beginning in order to get you into bed.

Girl’s Game Changer: In order the separate the man who actually DOES fall in love with you at first sight and CAN go the distance from the players, a woman must pace the relationship. Rules authors Ellen Fein and Sherrie Schneider recommend: Don’t see him more than once or twice a week for the first month or two. Don’t invite him back to your place for the first few dates, and try to hold off on sex until you’re confident he’ll stick around. Sure, a guy who’s just looking to get laid won’t put up with such “games from women.” In other words, you’ll weed out those who want only one thing.

Anti-Anti-Player Solution: You can keep a woman playing hard-to-get firmly ensconced in your rotation of regulars by making sure you have other options. Never date only one woman at a time. Always keep at least two in the kitty. A woman will find her ability to control you by pacing how frequently she delivers the goods severely compromised when you remain unruffled by her pussy machinations. Again, by flipping the seduction script and playing hard-to-get yourself, you lure the woman into chasing you. The ultimate pleasure for the player is not sex gotten, but sex given. It is especially satisfying to game a woman so well that she chases you into bed, instead of you chasing her.

2) The “spontaneity” game. At worst, this is when men try to pass off “booty calls” as spontaneous gestures of missing you and needing you.  At best, it’s just laziness, lack of organization, or taking a woman’s time and schedule for granted. Either way, it doesn’t really make a gal feel special or respected when a man calls right before he wants to see her.

Girl’s Game Changer: Ladies, if you would prefer that the men in your lives gave you more advance notice when asking you out, then STOP accepting last minute invitations!  Why not just tell him you prefer to be asked out in advance? You know, ‘cuz it’s all about communicating and being honest? BECAUSE IT WON’T WORK and it will only come across as nagging. As I said in my previous blog, I think the “three days in advance” (e.g., Wednesday for Saturday) as proposed in The Rules is reasonable.

Anti-Anti-Player Solution: Reframe your booty calls by making her feel that something is wrong with her for not being spontaneous. “I hope you’re an adventurous girl and not lame, because there’s this great sunset right now over the river that you can’t miss. Come join me, I’ve got champagne.” In general, you should refrain from booty calling all the time. She’ll quickly grow weary of them if that’s all she gets from you. Mix it up. A few scheduled dates, a few booty calls. Women love unpredictability.

3) The “good enough for now” game. This is the fun little merry-go-round in which a man creates the impression that the two of you are in a serious relationship when he’s actually stringing you along, enjoying your sexual favors and home-cooked meals, while actively looking for something better.

Girl’s Game Changer: If you’re seeing him once or twice a week, then make sure one of those dates is international date night: Saturday. Unless one/both of you are working or have family commitments on Saturdays, that’s when he gets to see you. How to get him to ask you out for Saturday? Say no to Thursday, Friday, Sunday, Monday…you get the idea. Once again, a man who is just marking time with you won’t “put up with such games” from women – which is precisely what we want! Men with lukewarm interest won’t pursue a woman who is even the slightest challenge – but not even teams of wild horses (much less a few pesky Rules) can deter the man who really, really loves you.

Anti-Anti-Player Solution: The problem with this advice is that the men women want most — alphas, cads, and assholes — are the least likely to “put up with such games” from women. So the woman who follows this “Girl’s Game Changer” rule will soon find herself missing out on the company of desirable men. Only the very hottest of women can get away with saying no to dates on any night other than Saturday night. And the man who DOES agree to a Saturday night date will, ironically, because of the perception that he had nothing better going on, become LESS attractive to the woman who adheres to such a draconian rule!

And that strikes at the inherent disconnect with a lot of these “Rules Girls” rules — the more successful women are at getting men to play by these rules, the less attractive those men become to them. So it is not only in men’s interest, but in women’s interest as well, for men to refuse to play by women’s rules.

As for the specific rule offered here, a way around it is to train your woman to have low expectations for seeing you on prime pussy hunting nights. Don’t schedule Saturday dates until at least a month has passed, and then only schedule them once or twice a month. When your woman has low expectations, it becomes a challenge to disappoint her.

4) The “break up to make up” game.  Two can certainly play at this game, but when the on-again-off-again routine starts stretching into years, vs. months, it’s women who have the most to lose, as time is our most precious, non-renewable resource.

Girl’s Game Changer: This one is so hard. As Greg Behrendt put it in He’s Just Not That Into You:

“What could be better than hearing from the man who just told you he didn’t want you in his life anymore, his sad, wistful, ‘I miss you so much’ voice on the other end of the phone? It’s validating. It’s exciting. It’s irresistible. But resist you must.”

Usually, when he breaks it off, it’s broken forever. But not always. Sometimes you’ve crowded and scared a guy, and the break up is his way of reasserting his space. So GIVE HIM SPACE. Don’t call him, don’t e-mail him. If he does call and ask to get back together, proceed with caution. He’s proven he can walk away from you once. The defensive dating techniques I recommend can protect your already bruised heart from getting brutalized once more.

Anti-Anti-Player Solution: None needed. This “rule” works to the benefit of the player. Half-assed breakups initiated by the man are a great way to spice up a sex life. You will never plunge into a wetter, wider pussy than the week after you’ve quasi-broken up with a girl and called her out of the blue to get together for drinks. It’s mean, but oh sweet jesus is it effective.

There is another common game men play – it’s actually a word game, where they pretend they have never heard of and certainly cannot pronounce such words as “marriage,” “commitment” and “children.” Deftly winning this game requires delicate skill, and deserves an entire blog on the subject. So tune in next time for “Engaged by Christmas.”

Anti-Anti-Player Solution: This is because after marriage, women have a hard time pronouncing such words as “blowjob”, “ass to mouth”, and “train station bathroom tug job”.

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Conversation I Had With A Vegetarian Girl

ME: So you eat fish but not delicious pig or cow?

GIRL: Fish are different. I don’t like the way farm animals are treated. It’s inhumane. Some animals have intelligence and emotions. Have you seen those big brown eyes on cows?

ME: Changing the subject for a sec… you’re very pro-choice right? You believe abortion should be legal.

GIRL: Of course.

ME: You don’t have a problem with third trimester fetuses getting torn limb from limb and sucked out of the womb?

GIRL: Ugh, why do you have to say that? Are you anti-abortion or something?

ME: Actually, no, I have no problem with abortion. But then I have no problem with killing and eating cow either.

A big reason abortion has such wide acceptance is because the disgust reflex isn’t triggered. The bloody affair takes place hidden behind closed flesh, so to speak. If the womb were transparent, I doubt legal justification for abortion beyond the first trimester would exist.

A true sadist embraces cruelty even when, maybe especially when, he can witness the tortured writhings of his victim. Ever see video footage of a guy about to jump off a building? Some people in the crowd below will yell “Jump!” as the poor guy stands high above them, lonely on the ledge, contemplating a suicidal leap. Would you yell “Jump!” if you could clearly see that man’s face, etched with pain and sadness?

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Cornered!

I’ve got a very important post up at men’s magazine The Spearhead for my Friday Night Game weekly series. Excerpt:

There are only three things that drain the blood faster from a man’s face than the thought of erectile dysfunction:

1. When your wife serves you divorce papers.
2. When you catch your woman fooling around with another man.
3. When your woman busts you for cheating.

The first two, luckily, haven’t happened to me, but the last one has… multiple times. And from those trials by ovarian fire I have learned a few valuable lessons. I’m here to tell you what to do — or, more precisely, what *not* to do — when your girl jabs the infidelity finger of accusation in your face.

Read about my recommendations for correctly handling a suspicious woman who (justifiably) accuses you of cheating. This is can’t miss information for the man who likes to keep a few on the side.

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Owning A Dog Is Training For Owning A Woman

I was sitting on a bench in a compact, refurbished dog park that had been covered in a fake grass like Astroturf — call it Turdturf — upon which 15 or 20 dogs were frolicking and licking each others’ balls while their owners talked amongst themselves and tried to avoid stepping on the smaller dogs. After spending some time wondering where the dog piss drains in the fake grass, I poked my companion.

“Check out that guy over there. The guy with the boxer. His dog is totally owning him.”

In the middle of the park a khaki-wearing herb was being ritually humiliated by his burly boxer. The dog ignored him, disobeyed him, and generally made a nuisance of itself careening into other dogs and people and sniffing a multitude of crotches with tremendous gusto. The herb feebly tried to corral his dog, begging and pleading with it to behave, and the dog… well, I’m almost positive the dog laughed at him, if dogs can do such a thing. The dog had a look that said “Yeah, this tool gives me free food. What a chump!” It was a demonstration of pure mockery, dog owning owner.

The whole scene reaffirmed a belief I have that properly owning a dog is excellent training for properly owning a woman. The behavior of dogs and women is eerily similar, and their relation to man testifies to that.

Like dogs, women need to be led. They *want* to be led. In fact, though they will never admit it, women want to be owned by their men. (I loved that he was so powerful I was nothing. – O on her lover)

Like dogs, women will walk all over you if you let them.

Like dogs, women will test you for your alpha status the moment you show weakness. There’s nothing dogs and women loathe more than being adrift in a non-hierarchical relationship. They both need to slip comfortably behind you in an established pecking order. It is there they find deep, true happiness and contentment.

Like dogs, women need to be trained. Shit tests are essentially a woman telling you “Please train me to respect you.” Oblige her.

Like dogs, women respond best to strong verbal and nonverbal commands. If you stare down a dog, it will always turn away first, if it recognizes your authority. Women will do the same.

Like dogs, women will eventually take to the leash, metaphorical or literal.

Like dogs, women want to be told to roll over.

Like dogs, women will hump anything if you allow them.

Dog training is alpha training; keeping a dog in line and assuming the role of pack leader will redound to other areas of your life. The skills and mindset required to rule the dog pack are not much different than the game required to rule a woman. You will soon learn what it means to have a commanding presence when you are the owner of a naturally unruly dog.

I have no doubt that the herb with the disobedient boxer is a doormat in his relationship, if he is in one. I’m sure that, like his boxer shits on the carpet, his girlfriend shits on his soul. If you are a beta, my advice is to save the $5,000 you would spend on a seduction workshop and instead pick up a dog at your local shelter. Since you will not be sexually attracted to the dog, you will find it very easy to work on your alpha leadership skills with it. Then what you learn with the dog will carry over into your dealings with women.

PS: Has the Afghan hound always been the dog of choice of the upper class? I can see why. The dog looks snobby, and it never sniffs the ground. Afghans keep their heads up when walking. It might as well be called the Alpha hound.

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Shady Character Game

With the right props and an inscrutable demeanor, you can take advantage of women’s instincts to be attracted to violent, unpredictable, enigmatic men. What’s that you say? Hot babes don’t go for criminals, thugs, or cold-blooded soulkillers? Keep telling yourself that.

If your lying eyes aren’t enough to convince you of the depraved nature of women’s desire, take it from the commenters who have every incentive to prove me wrong.

S. (a girl) wrote:

I don’t think something as far as implying you were a killer would be effective, since I wouldn’t want to be left alone with the guy. The person I’m currently seeing tells me that he implies he used to do a lot of drugs because it builds intrigue, in spite of it not being true. When I went to help him move however, I found some court documents for things like vandalism, petty theft, etc. and I was surprisingly more unfazed than I should have been.

Do you want a woman eating out of your palm? Make her think you’ve killed people! Don’t actually tell her, of course. Just leave subtle hints about a shady past you may or may not have had. Let her fill in the blanks. Although they will never admit it, women love filling in the blanks of the lives of their men. By cultivating an aura of mystery you give your women permission to indulge their need for manufactured drama. This is what women do best: Create worlds of pointless drama to impart meaning to the childless void in their lives. Men don’t do this because the very nature of men’s existence is drama, AUTHENTIC drama, from birth (more male babies than female babies die) to death (men die younger and die more often from accidents, disease, and violence).

Commenter Madras offered some good ideas for Shady Character Game:

Two tricks I use for relationship/regular-fuck-buddy game:

1.  Put a round under the pillow she is going to use every once in a while and let her find it.

2.  Forward her news articles about un-solved murders.

This would work. Here are my suggestions (some from personal experience):

• Cut letters of various shapes and sizes from magazines and make a threatening note to an anonymous recipient. “Forget” to mail this “letter” and keep it semi-hidden in your top desk draw. One thing I’ve learned over the years — if a woman likes you she is eventually going to snoop through all your shit. You won’t be able to stop her, no matter how diligently you watch over your stuff. Because of this sinister female reality, I have perfected the art of the “rapid evacuation shit”, so that when I have a girl over and I have to take a dump, I can force out the turds at lightning speed and be done in under 15 seconds, less time than she is able to start poking around my place. I’ve had times where I was in the bathroom for a couple of minutes enjoying a pleasant dump, and when I finished the girl was standing at the bathroom door confronting me about a CD she found next to my computer that another girl had made for me.
• Do you have arrest records? Keep them hidden in plain view. The worse the infraction, the wetter she’ll get. Unless its an arrest for possession of child pornography. If you don’t have arrest records, you can find guys who do and make photocopies of theirs, then scan the copies into your computer and use photoshop to change the name. Best type of arrest: Manslaughter. She’ll think you killed a man who probably deserved it and you had a good lawyer who got you off.
• Keep one long, sharp knife in a separate kitchen drawer by itself. Never use it to cut food. Bonus: It has an ivory handle carved with arcane Pagan symbols.
• Store drug paraphernalia in a cabinet. When she asks, tell her they’re “items of interest”.
• Did you cut yourself badly once? Save that blood-stained garment in your dresser. Alpha move: Put a “bullet hole” through the blood stain. Super alpha move: The garment is a woman’s blouse.
• Do you have any Mafia connections in your family? I do. (See: Goodfellas, Scene I, Upstate New York). Hang on the wall an old photograph of your great grandfather looking like a sharp-dressed Don.
• Keep a small, black velvet purse full of cubic zirconia stones (or if you’re really poor, quartz crystals) stashed in your bedside table.
• Passports with stamps from countries designated by the CIA as sponsoring terrorism or those which have no diplomatic ties with the United States are sure to pique your woman’s interest. For a pointer, see this list. If you haven’t been to these countries, just make your own stamps and read Wikipedia for a cursory knowledge of the local culture and political climate. She’ll never know the difference.
• Never let her see, or put something inside, the trunk of your car. If she presses, tell her the lock is broken.
• Install a large safe. Never tell her about it, or what’s inside. Keep one dried black rose in the safe. “Accidentally” leave the safe lock combination in full view one day for her to find.
• Do you have an attic or basement? Buy a large, antique oak chest with a giant lock and store it there.
• Occasionally rise from bed at 3AM while she snoozes. Leave for an hour. When you return, rustle the sheets a lot so she wakes up. Do this twice a month for a year.
• Own a gun.
• Own a vial of arsenic.
• Own a green-eyed black cat.
• Have a crate full of videocassettes or microfiche in your closet marked “Drop off points”, “Runners”, “Moles”, and “Sabine”.
• In blood red ink, have what looks like a love note in your jewelry box with the words “You did this to me” written on it.
• Have a “lost year”. When she asks you about it, assume the thousand yard stare, sigh heavily, and say “There’s not much to say.” Smile, and pour yourself a cup of tea immediately after saying this. It adds weightiness to your words.
• Edit a family home video of yourself as a child with interspersed frames of a cute but unkempt girl sitting on the floor in the corner of an empty, dimly lit room speaking to the unseen cameraman. She is dragging her hand through her hair while saying “I can’t right now”, “Stoooop”, and “I won’t tell anyone”. You will need to have made the “girl on floor” film with one of your girlfriends. Remind yourself to do this. Once you have finished this creepily intriguing edited film, place the cassette or DVD in plain view so your current girl(s) see it.
• Take a bunch of old-style, photo booth pictures of you and a girl you’re dating. Draw a thick black bar over the eyes of your girl. After you break up, save these “girlfriend redacted” photos for a future girlfriend to stumble across.
• Build a darkroom.
• Give yourself a cool facial scar.

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Does It Matter If Girls Know About The Game?

Answer: No.

But don’t take it from me. Hear it straight from a woman’s mouth (hat tip: reader Joe):

The last few years of Sunday brunches with my girlfriends have revealed that players tend to follow a particular pattern. They bang a girl, then don’t call for at least two weeks. When they decide they want some ass, they will hound her with six calls on a Saturday . . . and then a Wednesday . . . and then the next Friday . . . until she picks up. Repeat.

I like to call it the Player Pattern – one section of the unspoken rule book that players everywhere use to win their game. […]

[H]ow did the Player Pattern become a pattern? Because it happened to each of my girlfriends. Repeatedly. We may moan about a lack of respect, but every time we run into a bad boy, we think we can be the one to pull him to monogamy.

I still don’t quite understand why someone would perpetuate the Player ideology. It leads females to self-doubt and insecurities, makes us hesitant and difficult and renders communication near impossible. (i.e. we will pick fights and want to talk about feelings). But I do acknowledge that tips that come from blogs, game shows and your boys seem to work. So when the game is so easy to win, can you really blame the Player? Who is really the fool here?

When I first learned game, I had convinced myself that once the material and tactics got out into general circulation and became widely known amongst the set of pretty girls who get hit on the most, it would mean game would lose its element of surprise and women would stop responding positively to it. I figured once that in-field inflection point was reached women would revert back to getting aroused by men with the biggest pecs or loudest mouth. My worries couldn’t have been more unfounded. Game is out there and girls are still lubing themselves for men who run it on them. Even the girls who *know* they are getting gamed.

To see why this is so all you need to do is play a gender role reversal thought experiment. Imagine a girl and guy meet. They have a conversation, and sparks fly. The guy thinks the girl is very attractive. At the beginning of the conversation, the girl tells the guy she wore a push-up bra to catch his attention from across the room with her cleavage, and she put on makeup to enlarge her eyes, which she knew would highly arouse him. Then she tells him she will be sure to cross and uncross her legs a few times to draw his eyes to her thighs and crotch. She further explains that she will play coy by batting her eyelashes and looking down and away when he makes a strongly flirtatious move on her, figuring that will ignite his desire to chase her and make her seem more valuable to him. Finally, she tells him she will laugh a little too hard at one of his jokes on purpose, so he will feel like she really admires his sense of humor.

What do you think will go through the man’s head?

“Yes, she likes me! I am so getting laid.”

The man will not be any less aroused from knowing the games women play to manipulate his desire. In the same way, women are not any less aroused when they are aware that a man is seducing them. They will enjoy the seduction as long as he knows what he’s doing.

Caveat: There are some one-liners in the seduction community that will become so overused they could potentially blow a guy out. I’ve heard that the “Who lies more?” opener was so ubiquitous in LA at one time that women, when they heard it used on them, would laugh out loud and tell the guy to try new material. Fortunately, there is enough fresh material now that overuse should no longer be a problem. The community has grown tremendously and technology has advanced so much that a man could check his iPhone GET LAID NOW ASK ME HOW app for a suitable quickie opener *as the situation is unfolding* in front of him. That’s power at your fingertips.

As for the “player pattern” recognized by the woman who wrote the above article, I’m not aware that it’s common community advice to wait two weeks to call back a girl you’ve banged, and to call six times on Saturday, then follow up on Wednesday and Friday. This sounds more beta than PUA, as I find it’s best to call a girl you’ve banged the day after to smooth any rough edges and hold the door open for future bangs. When to call back isn’t a critical issue; as long as you’ve attracted the girl you can call back whenever you feel like it without repercussion. Just don’t pull a Swingers and call ten times the night you met her. That much should be obvious to any man with a lick of sense.

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