She’s A Superflirt

“Yo man, let’s go next door.”

“Why? It’s good here. And the bathroom is only ten feet away. Very convenient.”

“There’s a new club next door. It caters to the international crowd. Last time I was there it was filled with Russian women. And I know how you are about Russians.”

“How is it I haven’t heard of this magical land before?”

“You’re out of the loop. Time to pack up and move to the burbs.”

We left to check out club eurotrash. It was as advertised; hot foreign-looking women everywhere. I heard three different languages spoken as soon as I walked in the door, two vaguely Slavic and one Spanish. My buddy and I sat at a two seater table near the bar. The bartenders were women. The only men working here were the DJ and doorman.

We had barely settled in when a pretty blonde flitted up to us, smiling broadly. She had a delicate feminine jaw and chin, and high cheekbones. Very slender with nice sized tits. She was a hard 8.5. Later I would discover she was American, but spoke with a funny generic euro accent that she said she picked up from all her foreign friends.

She put her hand on my knee. “You’re cute. Where you guys from?”

Before I could answer she continued. She craned her head slightly upward as she spoke.

“Let’s dance! Come on, get up! It’s my birthday this week.” (Are girls now celebrating week-long birthdays? Isn’t there enough female entitlement?) She had grabbed both my hands and was guiding me up off my seat, her hips in a perpetual wriggle.

I knew this type well. The superflirt. Not drunk, but buzzed. Exraverted. Superficially confident. Used to getting her way with men. Weaponized femininity. A classic eternal ingenue. Likely had a boyfriend somewhere else and a couple of mother hens in attendance to supervise her.

The superflirt’s frame is all-powerful. Few men can resist getting sucked into it. But resist you must. I had three choices before me.

1. Brush her off.
2. Refuse to dance but attempt to get her to join us in conversation.
3. Dance with her.

Number one is fine if you want her to leave. But don’t expect to pull a superflirt out of her euphoric frame with aloofness and indifference. She’ll just waltz to the next guy willing to entertain her machinations.

Number two is a battle of the frames. Can you convince a hyper happy chick to focus on you for more than a second? All her energy is pulling her onto the dance floor, into the embrace of an envious or horny audience. You have no value to her other than your looks, and that’s weak sauce to a cute girl. She has approached you, thus stripping you of the momentum and careful planning of a male-initiated approach, and she has thrown out a hoop for you to jump through which is rigged to ensure failure. You jump, you lower your value. You refuse to jump, you look like a stick in the mud.

Number three is jumping through the hoop, but with an eye on the long game. That’s what I did.

I got up and we all danced languidly around the bar, her leading the way. (I had tried to maneuver myself in front but obstacles prevented a smooth transition.) She introduced me and my buddy to her two friends, a sausage-shaped older, short Latina and a tall, big-boobed, meaty girl. The mother hens. I tried to preemptively neutralize any future mother hennery by asking the tall girl if she was responsible for babysitting Superflirt while she had all the fun.

“No way. She can take care of herself.”

Bullseye.

I danced with Superflirt on and off for fifteen minutes. Every few seconds she would saunter away to harass the DJ, dance on the bar, or drink a free shot, courtesy of the gawking older men gathering around us. She would return and put her hands on my stomach, exclaiming with delight how hard it was, or she would tickle me. A few times she leaned in and rested her cheek on my cheek, whispering in my ear. She smelled like concentrated estrogen. Then she would recoil in mock indignation, and, without my prompting, announce she had a boyfriend.

“I have a boyfriend, just to let you know. No, really, I have a boyfriend.”

I’ll admit I was enjoying the spectacle, regardless if it led anywhere or not. Of course, I would do my best to lead it somewhere, but the superflirt is normally quarry best left to shot-buying chumps who can convince themselves they’re going home happy having danced with a cute chick for a minute.

“That’s great. So does my girlfriend.”

She cocked her head and stared at me quizzically, then giggled. “I reeeeeeeally have a boyfriend. I’m supposed to go to his place later.”

I ignored her. She hopped up on the bar again. I figured at this point she was teetering close to the edge of outright drunkenness, so if I was to make a bold move, I had to execute quickly.

There are two ways to handle a superflirt. One, nuclear negs followed by a bold sexual move that shocks her out of her attention whore programming. Two, jealousy plotlines that flip the script so she is chasing you. I wanted to do the first option, but she had stopped clambering into my lap in between dance moves. All I could accomplish was a few negs.

“Hey, stop tickling me. Do I look like a piece of meat?”

“Yes!”

“Sexual harassment! Is this how you hit on men? It’s not working.”

She twirled. I tried to keep her focused.

“How would you like it if I did that to you?” I tickled her middle and she shrieked joyously like a little girl so loudly I though my ears would bleed.

This was going nowhere. She was in full-on attention whore mode. Out of the corner of my eye, I spied a leggy woman of exquisite beauty wearing a miniskirt that climbed past mid-thigh. Her makeup was expertly applied, and she didn’t smile. An expression of disdain swept across her purse-lipped face.

Had to be Russian.

I sidled closer to her table where she was standing with a couple girls and some men, and listened in; yep, Russians. She glanced in my direction. I realized why. Preselection. She had front row seats to me getting pawed by Superflirt. A man can go up as much as five points simply by being seen in the company of a hot babe.

This was one last opportunity to break Superflirt’s frame. If I could be seen by her chatting up the Russian, she might reengage and be open to a proper seduction. All her earlier boyfriend chatter suggested to me she was subconsciously looking for an excuse to step out with a new man. And nothing works like jealousy on an eternal ingenue. She has to feel a competitive threat from equally pretty women.

Unfortunately, this story does not have a good ending. I opened the Russian, asking her why she wasn’t embarrassing herself like the other girls by dancing on the bar, because it’s what all American women do. As we talked I would steal a glance at Superflirt to see if she was watching us, but she had fallen on her ass next to a bar stool, drunk as sin, and one shot away from puking. Three men rushed in to help her up. I didn’t budge. When I turned back to continue my conversation with the Russian, the doorman was saying something to her and she clopped in three inch high heels toward the door to make a phone call outside.

It was near closing time. Superflirt stumbled past me on the way to the door. She stopped to drape her arms over my shoulders, and I told her to give me her number. It was a last ditch effort that I knew had a low chance of succeeding. She was barely cognizant. But she stuck to her boyfriend script.

“Can’t. No I really can’t. I’m going to my boyfriend’s place right now! He lives nearby.”

Admiring her tight ass and perfect 0.7 waist-hip ratio as she wobbled out into the street, I figured her boyfriend either had very strong pimp hand to feel comfortable letting her get drunk by herself in his own hood, or they were heading for a dramatic breakup within the month. What a fucking headache it is dating a superflirt. Best way to keep them in line is to date two or more of them at the same time.

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The Greatest Job In The World (For A Man)

What would be your criteria for the greatest job a man could have in the world? I’ll list what I think should be your criteria:

1. Continual exposure to a variety of young, pretty, naked women
2. Willingness of a significant subset of those young, pretty women to sleep with you
3. An occupational dynamic that requires leadership skills in the form of ordering young, pretty women to do your bidding
4. Very little competition from other men in the field, or on the job
5. Relatively high pay
6. Relatively high status
7. Minimal amount of rote work
8. Maximal amount of fun and creativity
9. Lots of travel to exotic and charming locations around the globe
10. Plenty of opportunity to discreetly cheat, if married or otherwise committed

Is there a man alive with working testicles who wouldn’t agree with my description of the perfect male job? No, I bet not.

So what is the greatest job in the world?

Meet Richard Kern.

Kern has been taking photographs of attractive naked women for 25 years in countries around the world. Young women in various states of undress. Naked women in pools. Naked women in showers. Naked women smoking pot. Naked women combing their hair. Naked women on all fours scrubbing the floor. And, presumably, naked women sucking his dick after work hours.

I know what you’re thinking. Kern is not gay. He’s married to a hot chick more than half his age. Kern is in his 50s, but he looks younger and, more importantly for men interested in picking up younger women, he *acts* like a man half his age. His is a life of unrelenting joy and exquisite pleasure. If there is a heaven on earth, Kern has found it. When asked if he has slept with any of his subjects, he is not coy, admitting that he’s had a number of sexual relationships with the ladies he photographs.

Surprisingly, Kern does a lot of his shooting with a pocket digital camera. He prefers capturing in voyeuristic style the natural beauty of the girl-next-door, the kind of girl you most want to despoil. Kern is almost clinical about the sexuality of his subjects that infuses his work, going on for impressive lengths about the shape, size, color and texture of the great megafauna of breastessesss constantly bouncing in front of his camera lens. Reminds me of someone else.

Some may wonder if it’s Kern’s job that attracts the girls, or if the job is merely incidental to Kern’s seductive alphaness. It’s more the latter, but no doubt photography, and the men skilled at it, are especially attractive to women, probably for the reason that any visual-based skill or artistry, being primarily the domain of maleness, is naturally intriguing to the visuo-spatially challenged sex. But that is a minor effect. The status of Kern’s job, and his status within the field, is the predominant attractor when we separate his personality from his achievements. Men who excel in female-oriented fields are also very attractive to women.

I bet you’re curious about Kern’s wife. I was. So I found this illuminating documentary video of Kern and Martynka. It’s short, about 11 minutes. You should watch the whole thing. It is 11 minutes demonstrating the power of pure game. What comes out of the video is just what a natural player Kern is, and the classic seduction and alpha male dynamics which hold powerful sway over the pretty Martynka’s emotional fidelity to her husband.

Some choice quotes:

Interviewer: Do you ever get jealous?

Martynka: No, I actually… it’s a weird thing… but it turns me on that he’s like shooting 18 year old hot girls. I find it exciting. I don’t get bored of him in that sense, because… I know it sounds weird but I actually thinks it’s cool he’s out, hanging out with like some 18 year old girl in her bedroom, showing him her tits, and um, it keeps things exciting for me, cause that little bit of jealousy makes my obsession last longer.

You don’t say!

I remember when I wrote that “women want you to cheat” post it engendered howls of indignation from my many female commenters. Oh, how you say… what was it again?…. oh yah…

Watch what women do, don’t listen to what they say.

What about the proposal? Certainly an inveterate and experienced womanizer like Kern would know better than to drop to one knee and beg for indentured servitude. Does Richard Kern follow my advice and propose to Martynka like an alpha male? Does a herb load in his pants?

Interviewer: So you guys got married in June. Was the proposal special, was it kind of romantic?

Martynka: It was very Richard style.

Interviewer: What was it?

Martynka: He didn’t really propose. But it was really cute. Cause he was so nervous about it.

Interviewer: So he kind of proposed but didn’t propose?

Martynka: No, he didn’t even say what it is.

[Scene switch]

Interviewer: Tell me about when you proposed to Martynka?

Richard: Oh, um, I couldn’t actually say the words that you have to say to do that, and, um…

Interviewer: Will you marry me?

Richard: Yeah. So, I, um, I didn’t have a birthday present for us, see, and I knew she had to get married to get a green card, so I tried to pass it off as my birthday present.

Interviewer: She said it took like 45 minutes to understand what you were asking.

Richard: Yeah, I never actually said it. [Ed: Richard almost sounds proud of this. Ha!]

But this was my favorite Kern-ism:

Richard: I’m fine with being married as long as I don’t have to talk about it, or acknowledge it.

Talk about a cunt-wetting frame.

By the way, Kern stole Martynka away from her much younger boyfriend. As the internet nerd herd might say: THIS.

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The Self-Delusion Cloak Of Invincibility

Women in their late 30s are freezing their eggs because they haven’t yet found the perfect badass alpha male willing to commit to them and love them for all eternity in between time spent ruling the galaxy.

A study of women at a Belgian clinic found half wanted to freeze their eggs to take the pressure off finding a partner, a fertility conference heard.[…]

The women who had an average age of 38 did not expect to use their frozen eggs until they were around 43 and they realised they needed to undergo the procedure while they were still healthy and fertile.

“We found that they had all had partners in the past, and one was currently in a relationship, but they had not fulfilled their desire to have a child because they thought that they had not found the right man.”

The self-delusion on display here is astounding. These are supposedly smart, educated women thinking like this. They are deluding themselves in two ways. One, late 30s is too late to start harvesting eggs. The shelf life of eggs is short; the primo years for eggs are late teens to mid 20s to begin scooping them out in order to have babies at a much later date through an older woman’s bedraggled, paper-thin vajeen, just as nature intended. But the bigger self-delusion (and the funnier one from my point of view), is the implied belief of these women that they are exempt from the laws of the sexual marketplace. Do smart women really believe that in their late 30s to early 40s they are just as attractive to the alpha males as they were when they were younger, hotter, tighter? If their behavior and spending decisions are any indication, the answer is yes.

They are in for a rude awakening. Oh sure, a couple of them might get extraordinarily lucky and land their prince chumplings, but most will either fade into sexual worthlessness, crying tears of despair at night as their dreams stalk them with visions of empty children’s playpens, or they will suck it up and learn to settle for the unexciting beta lapdog with the advanced degree in domestic engineering. A few will choose to tough it out as single moms, gifting the world with yet another juvenile delinquent or slut in training.

On a side note, how would you feel if you were the “man” in a relationship with one of these cunts who was letting you know in no uncertain terms that she’s putting off childbearing because she doesn’t believe you are worthy of inseminating her? Would that be grounds for switching out her birth control pills for flintstones vitamins just to fuck with her?

[Dr Srilatha Gorthi] said the medical students gave career reasons as the most common reason for considering egg collection while the other students were more concerned about financial stability.

And she added that society needs to better support young women in having a family when they are ready without compromising their careers.

Typical wrongheaded feminist advice. “Better supporting” young women to have a family is exactly what got them into this predicament in the first place. What happens when society stitches a safety net of financial, legal, social, and cultural support under young women? Why, they ride the cock and career carousel until the parties start to get boring, and then they go asking for handouts from the state, from business, and from desperate betas to help them raise their late in life love children.

Here’s a crazy thought: maybe what the West needs to avoid a sad decline is a little less support, instead of more.

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Study Confirming My View Of The Job-Sexual Marketplace Nexus

Apropos yesterday’s post:

This paper examines the extent to which human capital and career decisions are affected by their potential returns in the marriage market. Although schooling and career decisions often are made before getting married, these decisions are likely to affect the future chances of receiving a marriage offer, the type of offer, and the probability of getting divorced. Therefore, I estimate a forward‐looking model of the marriage and career decisions of young men between the ages of 16 and 39. The results show that if there were no returns to career choices in the marriage market, men would tend to work less, study less, and choose blue‐collar jobs over white‐collar jobs. These findings suggest that the existing literature underestimates the true returns to human capital investments by ignoring their returns in the marriage market.

Source: “Marriage and Career: The Dynamic Decisions of Young Men” from “Journal of Human Capital”

You can read more here.

I am proven right once again. There are radical sexual marketplace consequences from the integration of women into the workforce. The sexual market is not a positive sum game. Economically empowered women curse themselves with a smaller dating pool of acceptable men, because female hypergamy adjusts itself relative to the status of the woman. This explains why we see the absurd phenomenon of ugly, aging, unmarried bitter lawyer cunts refusing to settle. Once millions of women are working at the same or higher level as working men, those men — who in the past could count on their worker drone jobs to give them enough status over women to sexually attract them — see their sexual market leverage decrease as a consequence of immutable female hypergamy.

Result: men turning away from the drudgery of building careers as a surefire investment strategy for acquiring pussy. The ROI of a corporate 9 to 5er is decreasing rapidly, and men are beginning to catch onto this.

Prediction: as long as women remain a large and growing segment of the white collar job market, men will continue to “drop out”. Replacement strategies for men include:

– prostitution (with concomitant calls for legalization)
– sexbots/3D porn
– video gaming
– growth of high paying blue collar trade jobs that women studiously avoid
– thuggishness
– game and assorted pickup strategies. (i.e. the birth of the “alpha mimicry market”.)

There are now more beta and omega male losers than ever before thanks to the whittling away of men’s traditional route to status through work. (Note: reproductive success does not equal sexual market success. While less promiscuous “betas” — and I use quotes to imply that promiscuity is not necessarily a defining characteristic of alphaness — may have more children on average than more promiscuous “alphas”, the timing of those childbirths are the relevant variable. A beta who goes his entire 20s and maybe even his 30s watching from the sidelines as the young hot babes ride the alpha bang bus is going to find cold comfort once that rode worn and tossed away wet former hottie deigns to settle for him in her waning 30s in order to pop out a couple kids before she well and truly hits the wall headlong.)

I can’t say when the breaking point in such an unstable system occurs, or how it will occur, but it will happen, sooner or later. Unlimited Third World immigration, of course, only exacerbates this inherent instability. I think betas and omegas would do themselves much good if they jettisoned their antiquated morality, kicked out the legs from the pedestals they raise women onto, and turned to the task of learning how to give women exactly what they crave — male dominance and high status through game. That way, they can enjoy not just reproductive success with cougars, but sexual success with kittens.

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DC Is Not A Chick Mecca

Over at Mexican Annexation, T. “cheap chalupas uber alles” Cowen has a theory on the dating market for men in Washington DC:

I think it’s better to date here if you are male. Government attracts a disproportionate share of intelligent women. I’ve never lived in New York, but there are so many celebrities, billionaires. If you are a guy in New York, there’s always another guy that crushes you on the scale. Here, there are all these politicians but they are really out of commission for the most part — or if they fool around, it’s with interns. You don’t have to compete with them. The people who are really high status are off the market. As a male in Washington, you can be high in status fairly easily without the true very high status competing. In New York or L.A., there are movie stars and directors. Even if a woman can’t be with a movie star, women can still say, ‘Gee, this guy or that guy is not a movie star or a director.’ There’s lobbyists and lawyers here, a lot of them. You can be more interesting than that. This is a great place to live.

Allow me to add my more correct thoughts.

1. Government attracts a disproportionate share of *credentialed* women. While intelligence and credentials are correlated, they aren’t the same. Some of the most boring women I have ever met were multi-degreed widgets freshly pressed off the academia soulsucking assembly line. Some of the sassiest and funniest women I have ever met never had the luck to pay off a crushing student loan debt. And let’s cut the crap about smart women — most men measure a woman’s dating market worth by her looks, her feminine personality, and her willingness to experiment sexually in bed. Her smarts comes in a distant — waaaaay distant — fourth place. There is a place for female smarts, but that place is at an easy to reach lower bound of IQ where she isn’t so much dumber than the man she is with that he finds it insufferable to deal with her continually not getting his jokes and cultural references. Generally, the men who wax eloquent about the romantic charms of female intelligence are nerdos who have an incentive to pump up the one redeeming quality of womankind they can afford to bargain for.

2. NYC is a good example of what happens when a male-favorable sex ratio smashes up against a female-favorable hypergamous culture — the latter usually wins. There are more fertile-age women in NYC than in other cities, but the few male super alphas operate essentially Sultan of Brunei-like harems. Nonetheless, New York is still pretty good for the average man who can survive there, because there are so many cute chicks from which to choose. Betas may have to tolerate banging 7s disappointed they aren’t going to be the next Mrs. Hedge Fund Guy, but on the bright side for them, it beats self-beating.

3. Nobody who is high status is “off the market”. Even marriage is no escape from the sexual market. The divorce revolution is a lagging indicator of this reality. If there’s something to be said for betas wondering about the playing field in DC, it’s that the behavior of conventional alphas there is more constrained by political necessity. There’s a higher price to be paid for a politician caught with two mistresses than for a stockbroker or business owner.

4. Senor Cowen exaggerates the hypergamous calculating of women in NY and LA. There are only a relative handful of movie stars in LA. Most women are not so blinkered to think that sitting out their dating lives in celibacy for years while waiting for a shot at that 0.001% of the local “authentic” alpha male population is an acceptable lifestyle. If you are a man with game — i.e. you have an understanding of psychosocial dominance and how to apply it — you will get laid with hot girls in LA, even those of the monomaniacal actor- and director-chasing variety. Especially with those if you are a skilled liar.

5. I agree that the conventional alphas with pull in DC tend to be boring, and that it is a simple matter to project a more interesting personality in comparison. The guys I used to know in DC who did best with women were, respectively, a bartender, a bike messenger, a real estate agent, a lawyer, and a technical writer. Only the lawyer was what women would describe as a traditional, high status alpha. What did they have in common? Unstoppable confidence. Charm. Balls. There ya go.

6. The widely-cited female skewed sex ratio of DC is a myth. This website neatly explains why. Only if you count all women between the ages of 20 and 64 does DC have a large surplus of women. But what man who isn’t a total loser wants to date a woman who made splat with the wall decades ago? Change the slider on the map to cover the age range of singles from 20 – 39, the years for which women still retain rapidly declining sexual marketability, and you’ll see that every major city in America except for Springfield, MA (5 extra women per 1,000 people) has a surplus of single men. No wonder most bars look like this. However, in DC’s defense, its male surplus isn’t as bad as the male surplus in most big cities.

7. DC girls are not ugly. There are plenty of cute chicks, and even some beautiful ones, gallivanting through the halls of trendy lounges and shamtastic art shows. They might not be as beautiful on average as NY or LA girls, but they can hold their own versus girls in Chicago, Houston, and Seattle. And don’t get me started on Portland girls. Ugh.

8. The best looking women won’t be found in America. For that, you’ll have to travel to Tallinn or Kiev.

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Curiosity, Women And Game

Thursday left a link in the comments to this study showing that couples who do fun and exciting things together have happier marriages.

In a representative sample of long-term married couples in the United States (see Orbuch et al., 2002, for General Social Survey data comparisons), present boredom is positively correlated with a decrease in satisfaction 9 years in the future, an effect that appears to be due to boredom undermining closeness, which in turn undermines satisfaction. The effect size (b 5 􏰀.26) is quite dramatic considering that it predicted regressed change over 9 years and the sample includes only couples still together at year 16. (The 38 couples tested at year 7 who divorced by year 16 were nonsignificantly more bored at year 7 than the 123 couples who remained married.) Furthermore, all results were inde- pendent of relationship tension and conflicts. Previous cross- sectional surveys, hour-to-hour experience-sampling studies, and short-term experiments suggested such a pattern, but this is the first time it has been shown over a significant period of time and in a representative sample.

Mediation by closeness, which had not been directly tested before, integrates central aspects of the self-expansion model. Specifically, it suggests that excitement in relationships facili- tates or makes salient closeness, which in turn promotes satis- faction in the long term. Indeed, closeness may promote satisfaction via other mechanisms known to be associated with promoting satisfaction over time, such as perceived partner re- sponsiveness, transformation of motivation, commitment, com- munal norms, positive illusions, and trust.

Regarding application, these findings show directly, for the first time, that not only conflicts, but also simple boredom, can shape relationships over the long term. Given that short-term experiments demonstrate that couples can reduce boredom with shared exciting activities, the present findings suggest that benefits may be substantial and long lasting, for both husbands and wives and across racial groups—pointing to easy-to-im- plement potential additions to educational, marital preparation, and enrichment programs, and a possible supplementary tool for marital counselors. Thus, as has been found in many other do- mains, increasing rewards may matter as much or more than reducing costs; or, in more contemporary terms, it may be im- portant to focus not just on eliminating negatives, but also on enhancing positives.

This study simply confirms what game practitioners already know: curiosity is a leading indicator of alphaness. Women are drawn to the curious man. Semantically substitute “passion ” for “curiosity” and it becomes clearer why. A man satisfied with his little corner of the world is a boring man. Forget what women say about short men, or ugly men, or old men — the true tingle killer is boredom. A short, ugly, old man with genuine curiosity about the world and people around him can hit well out of his league.

Like most other personality traits, the distribution of curiosity is Gaussian. At one extreme are men like Roosh who are so curious about their place in the world they are willing to leave their homeland and careers to spend years in foreign countries with strange people who speak a strange language. At the other extreme are the semi-vegetative zombies and autisitic cases who need an unchanging daily routine just to function. In the vast middle lie the average everyday incurious Joes… happy with their lives, content to clock in their eight hours, come home to a cold brew, a warm dinner and a kiss from the wife, and occasionally take the family sightseeing in the countryside. Oh, and once in a while go crazy and try a new brand of beer.

Curiosity can exist along many metrics. Travel isn’t the only sign of a curious mind. A man who reads voraciously from all sorts of genres is more curious than the average man. And a well-read man, like a well-traveled man, will have a leg up on the competition when building rapport with a woman.

A lot of so-called alpha haters come to this board to bitch about how “true alphas” wouldn’t go out of their way to learn how to attract women. The common refrain is usually “A real alpha doesn’t worry what women think. He does his own thing.” But the fact is, we are all working hard to satisfy the requirements of the opposite sex, whether or not we consciously acknowledge it or are even aware of what we are doing. A “natural” is simply a man who has been following the precepts of game from an earlier age than most men, and therefore it is a deeper component of his psychology. Likewise, a naturally curious man who has never known what it is like to be incurious will do better with women than less curious men.

People who neglect to shape themselves into the ideal attractiveness archetype demanded by the opposite sex soon lose out to competitors who do. A wife who lets herself go is demonstrating by her actions that she doesn’t care about her husband’s desires. He will soon look elsewhere for pleasure and love. Similarly, and apropos the above study, a husband who stops taking his wife on interesting adventures demonstrates he doesn’t care about her desires. She, too, will then be inclined to wander. Naturally, not every man can reach Rooshian levels of curiosity; or at least, they can’t reach it without significant discomfort to their psyches. To expect otherwise is to assume the average man can alter his personality wholesale for the length of his life. Game requires no such psychological contortions from men. A simple and minor adjustment in the typical man’s curiosity quotient is usually enough to increase his attractiveness to women tenfold.

My advice to the naturally incurious man is as follows:

1. Find an equally incurious girl (there are more incurious girls than there are incurious men as sociosexuality science would predict, so this shouldn’t be too hard). A woman whose basal inertia level is lackadaisically low will not demand more than a token sign of inquisitiveness from her man. She will be satisfied with small changes to her routine.
2. Make an effort to push yourself out of your incurious comfort zone. This means focusing your mind on doing something out of the ordinary once in a while. For instance, instead of taking your girl out to dinner next Saturday like every other herbling, go indoor rock climbing with her. The ensuing rush (kept in check by safety ropes and belays) is nature’s perfect vaginal lube.
3. Learn to LISTEN. Women LOVE LOVE LOVE men who actually listen to them. Listening intently to a woman will make you seem like a curious man, and is especially worthwhile as it gives you valuable information to tailor your game. Note that listening is not quite the same thing as paying strict attention. It’s perfectly acceptable to nod your head and mutter a few uh huhs while she speaks as your mind drifts to wondering about the size of her areolae, as long as you commit to memory at least a couple of her points. You only need to remember a few key words with which to feed back to a girl to wow her as a man who “gets it”.
4. Do new things if for no other reason than that it will give you material to use during a pickup. Having trouble telling engaging stories to girls? That’s your subconscious telling you that you need a vacation to a place you haven’t yet visited.
5. Be unpredictable. Unpredictability can make a day trip to the beach seem like a fantastic getaway to a remote fantasy island. A surprise trip once every couple of months will be enough to keep the average vagina tingly and loyal.

Curiosity is win-win for men. You do fun, exciting things, and women become more attracted to you because of it. All it takes is a push off the couch. Given that most men can’t even manage that (“Game’s on, baby. Not now.”), a push off the couch automatically puts you ahead of the vast swath of men who secretly bore their girlfriends and wives.

But there is a downside. Women who are searching for a monogamous relationship should know that highly curious men are also curious about the opposite sex. Like most attractiveness traits that a woman admires in a man, her strongest desire is for that which can potentially hurt her.

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It May Be Better To Game In Small Groups

Randall Parker forwarded me a link to a study about abundance of mate choice affecting the quality of the choice.

Quantity may determine quality when choosing romantic partners

The context in which humans meet potential mates has a hidden influence on who they decide to pursue. In particular, when people have a large number of potential dating partners to select among, they respond by paying attention to different types of characteristics – discarding attributes such as education, smoking status, and occupation in favor of physical characteristics such as height and weight.

A number of studies in recent years have looked at what happens to humans when faced with extensive choice – too many kinds of chocolate, or too many detergents to choose from at the grocery store. Under such circumstances, consumer psychologists believe that the brain may become “overwhelmed,” potentially leading to poorer quality choice or choice deferral. Psychological scientist Alison Lenton, of the University of Edinburgh, and economist Marco Francesconi, of the University of Essex, wanted to know if the same was true of mate choice, given that humans have been practicing this particular choice for millennia. “Is having too many mate options really like having too many jams?” they ask. The study is published in Psychological Science, a journal of the Association for Psychological Science.

To find out how people respond to relatively limited versus extensive mate choice, Lenton and Francesconi analyzed data from 84 speed dating events, which is where people meet with a series of potential dates for three minutes each. Afterward, the men and women report their choices (a “yes” or “no” for each person). It should surprise no one that choosers generally preferred people who were taller, younger, and well-educated. Women also preferred partners who weren’t too skinny, and men preferred women who weren’t overweight. Beyond that, though, the attributes that speed daters paid attention to depended on how many opposite-sex speed daters attended the event.

At bigger speed dating events, with 24 or more dates, both male and female choosers were more likely to decide based on attributes that could be judged quickly, such as their dates’ height, and whether they were underweight, normal weight, or overweight. At smaller events, choosers were more likely to make decisions based on attributes that take longer to identify and evaluate, such as their dates’ level of education, their type of job, and whether or not the person smokes.

“Obviously, I think we look for different attributes in partners than what we look for in a chocolate, a jam or a 401(k) plan,” says Lenton. “But one of the points we’re trying to make in this article is it’s the same brain we’re carrying around. There are constraints on what our brains can do – they’re quite powerful, but they can’t pay attention to everything at once.” And if the brain is faced with abundant choice, even about who to go out with, it may make decisions based on what it can evaluate most quickly. As a result, this previously invisible aspect of the choice environment has the potential to determine one’s romantic fate.

The consumerists’ quandary. I’m surprised this phenomenon hasn’t been discussed more by game instructors. It would seem logical that the number of girls as well as the number of men in a pickup environment would have an effect on how we choose mates and how we ourselves are perceived as mates. How many times have you stood in front of a huge aisle displaying 62 varieties of vitamins and just said “fuck it” and grabbed the cheapest, or the nearest, brand? If “choice deferral” or choice constriction happens with vitamin brands, then it could conceivably happen with girl brands.

So what are the take-home points from this study? What should we men, always on the lookout for a quicker route to getting laid and loved, learn from the study’s conclusions?

1. In groups that have a lot of men, (for example, clubs and bars on busy nights), women will evaluate your mate potential on “superficial” (i.e. readily discernible) qualities like height and looks.
2. A corollary to number 1 is that in venues where there is a lot of male competition for the women to choose among, and you are average or below in superficial traits, you will not get many chances to run game on the girls.
3. In groups of few people, (for example, book clubs or painting classes), women will evaluate your potential as a partner on more “meaningful” qualities that can only be discovered during the course of lengthier conversations.
4. A corollary to number 3 is that women will be more likely to grant an average looking man an audition at an event that has few other men from which the women can choose. She will also want to know more about each man she joins in conversation.

If you imagine each woman has a tingle-o-meter that oscillates with varying strength to the proportion of male attractiveness traits present in a man she is talking with, and that also oscillates according to the number of other men in her visual field, then you can visualize how a typical woman will react to you in different environments. If you are great looking and tall, you will get a lot of insta-play from women where large numbers of other men are present. She will be choosing you almost entirely based on your easily perceived high value traits, and will likely be more forgiving of any shortfalls you may have in the less visually oriented suite of male attractiveness traits. So if you’re a broke, uneducated, Johnny Depp lookalike, you’ll want to make nightclubs your venue of choice, and you’ll want to close the deal sooner rather than later, before she has an inclination to dig deeper into your value as a man.

If you are not great looking or tall, then you’ll want to steer clear of venues where there will be a lot of men. You will do best in smaller groups with few men, let’s say bars on a weeknight, where the women will be open to learning more about you, and also likelier to overlook any physical shortcomings you may have. She will be choosing you based on a mixed package of easily perceived physical traits and less obvious high value male traits such as dominance, physical assuredness, humor, and charm/game. So if you have tight game but lack the looks to easily acquire auditions to demonstrate your game, you’ll want to focus on environments with few other men around, like day game or really any venue on a night besides Friday or Saturday night.

Since by definition most men are not in the top 10% of looks and height, it stands to reason that pickup instructors should not be teaching game to newbies in high energy environments like nightclubs. The best place to practice game is any place where a bunch of superficially high value men will not show up to distract the girl.

Some other conclusions we can draw from the study:

• This “choice abundance mentality” by women can be artificially triggered. If you have a lot of guy friends who are worse looking than you, then bring your posse to the local club. Faced with all those men to choose from, the women will naturally gravitate to you as the most superficially appealing man of the group.
• Addendum to the above: your friends can’t be *too* dorky, because then the women will tar you with the same dork brush.
• Also, if one of your less good looking friends has better game than you, and the environment you are in is sufficiently low key that he can run his game undistracted, then he may steal the girls’ attention from you. Good looks on a man are great, but good game is even better.
• If you are very good looking but a so-so conversationalist, you will want to stay away from things like book clubs, where the homelier men with sharp wits will absolutely crush you. I’ve seen it happen. Score one for the smooth talking Voltaires.
• If you are very good looking but have no game, suit up and hit da clubs on a busy night where women can instantly compare your looks to a ton of other men. Physical presence game is all you’ll need. Try to get used to one night stands.
• Homelier men should focus on gaming one or two girls in a night. They need more time to allow their heart light to shine. Theirs is a big stage with lots of props and a multitude of scenes to tell the story. Homelier men must be better at building connections with women, because a strong emotional connection will handily compensate for a weak physical magnetism.
• Good looking men should maximize the number of girls they hit on in a night. They don’t need a lot of time to attract attention. Theirs is a small stage featuring a one-act play and a very large audience all vying to get his autograph after the show. By maximizing the number of targets and compressing time spent with each target into a few minutes, they maximize their chance for a same night lay.
• If you have a sucky job and few ostentatious credentials to wave around, but your game is tight, you’ll want to hit on girls in large venues. The girls will be less likely to grill you on your educational and career background, and more likely to enjoy the spontaneous feelings you evoke in them. In other words, choice abundance means that girls are going to be too distracted to bother figuring out your life story. A confused girl is an easily gamed girl.
• If you have a great job, money, and conventional cred, but your game is weak, you’ll want to hit on girls on slow nights in smaller venues, or day game and insta-date them. Maximize your strengths and minimize your weaknesses. A calm, focused girl is a future time oriented girl who will judge on substance more than flash. (Note: sluts excluded.)
• Where there are a lot of men, you can create the illusion of male scarcity (and thus increase your odds of successfully gaming a girl) by walking away from girls early in a conversation. Always end conversations first, seem needlessly distracted, and make it seem like you are a man who has options, even if technically in a bar with more men than women, you don’t.
• If you are looking for a wife or girlfriend, you may want to shift your base of operations to smaller venues or events where you will be less tempted by choice abundance to invest time gaming the flashiest chicks whose key attribute is how good to go they are.

Apropos the study, only go to speed dating events where the women rotate. You will seem in higher demand than you really are.

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