Attention Whore Of The Month

Chateau Heartiste introduced Beta of the Month, Alpha of the Month, and Hamster of the Month. Now we premiere a new contest called Attention Whore of the Month (AWOTM), where you, the readers, get to vote for the most repugnant woman who lives for that dopaminergic rush of ego-assuaging attention from an audience of admirers or, if admirers are hard to come by, of haters who will at least make her feel like the queen of turd world.

Our first AWOTM candidate is Lacey Spears, a “mommy blogger” who is being investigated for poisoning her five-year-old son for sympathy feels from fat, bored housewives.

my eyes are portals to hell

Mommy bloggers are a blight on the internet. The half that aren’t crazy are so crippled by looking at life through a platitude lens that they may as well be a metaphorical mind poison that subversively distances women from their children and husbands.

Of course, a mommy blogger with Munchhausen syndrome by proxy is an especially potent form of attention whore, similar to how a paper clip counting and open borders cheerleading autistic is a severe manifestation of an anti-social personality. Some would wonder whether it’s fair to include such a diseased monster in the AWOTM running, but I would counter that all attention whores of whatever degree of expression reside along a spectrum of ego-gluttonous femaleness that concludes at the far right tail with those under the influence of a pathological agent that amplifies their natural predilection for attention. It’s basically impossible to find a woman who doesn’t indulge in the occasional attention whoring; the trick is to screen out the chronic hamsterbators who have trouble making it through a day without creating a Drudge-worthy spectacle of themselves.

******

AWOTM candidate #2 is an actress *snort* named Emily Letts (let’s just talk about MEMEME, mmkay?) who had her abortion filmed and uploaded to YouTube for god only knows how many views it would have taken to make her feel like her life was more meaningful than serving as an HPV chamber for a parade of pump and dumps. She summoned a tremendous hamster circus reservoir of strength and courage to leave the following message:

This is my story. This is ONLY my story. I do not pretend that it is anything more or anything less. I do not speak for everyone on this sensitive subject and I respect everyone’s opinions as long as they do not force them onto others.

Psycholicious feminist attention whores have a habit of contradicting themselves within the span of two sentences.

My dearest hope is that someone somewhere will see this and it will provide some guidance, strength, support, or whatever else they need in that moment. I want to tell that person that you are not alone. Having an abortion does not make you a bad person, a bad woman, a bad mother. Having an abortion does not make you guilty. It is simply one step in your reproductive story. You are not along. I am here for you. We are all here for you.

Translation: I feel really weird and unfabulous and frighteningly alone about this abortion, so if I just put up a coyly unpornographic video of it along with feels appeals and self-exonerating pabulum repeated ad nauseam, I can return to imagining myself the brave and beautiful and empowered ass-kicking PocaMulaLisbeth heroine I was born to be.

But why such a tease, m’lady? Pan down and whore out the gory details! What’s stopping you?

PLEASE PLEASE SHARE THIS VIDEO. Please help me spread it to all corners of the internet. 1 in 3 women will have or have had an abortion in their reproductive life. This video is for all of us.

If by “all of us” she means her galactically vast yet curiously barren ego that must swallow planets whole to survive.

I found out I was pregnant in November. I had been working at the clinic for about a year. It was my first pregnancy, and, full disclosure, I hadn’t been using any kind of birth control, which is crazy, I know. I’m a sex educator, and I love talking about birth control.

An intoxicatingly aloof alpha made her an offer she couldn’t resist.

Before this experience, hormonal birth control scared me because of complications I’d heard about from friends — gaining weight, depression, etc.

She had to stay slender for the boys she likes. Attention whores may live by the platitude, but their actions betray an intimate understanding of the unforgiving mechanics of the sexual market.

So I tracked my ovulation cycle, and I didn’t have any long-term partners.

Cock goes up, poon goes down
urban slut, got to go round
talkin’ ’bout your troubles, it’s an ego win
ride a raw dog cocka
let the carousel spin
[brass interlude]

I thought I was OK. But, you know, things happen.

“Mistakes were made.”
– the amazing disappearing female agency

Once I caught my breath, I knew immediately I was going to have an abortion. I knew I wasn’t ready to take care of a child.

The guy wasn’t involved in my decision.

He bolted. *swoon*

I called my supervisor and said, “Excuse me, I am going to need to schedule one abortion, please.” It was very early in the pregnancy, only two to three weeks.

Patients at the clinic always ask me if I can relate to them — have I had an abortion? Do I have kids? I was so used to saying, “I’ve never had an abortion but…” While I was pregnant and waiting for my procedure, I thought, “Wait a minute, I have to use this.”

Of course she had to use it. Where would the world be without her story, her tribulation, her endless infantile need for external validation?

******

AWOTM candidate #3 is an exceptionally tacky contributor to a website that documented the phenomenon of “mommy selfies“. (Where the hell are the husbands in these families? Did they abdicate their duty as primary authority entirely?)

thanks for teaching me how to pimp, mom

The internet has allowed the upper classes to see the lower classes in all their ignominy. Kind of a nation-scale “Scared Straight” program.

For tits and wiggles, here are a couple more of these class acts:

for some reason, i will be shocked when you grow up to become a paint-huffing whore

Middle finger? Check. Mulatto womb effluvium? Check. “Ow, my balls!” TV show in background? Not yet, but soon.

hold on dear, your vulva is showing. lemme fix that.

Nothing says fat, headcase mom like vicarious whoring through your daughter.

The selection of these three attention whore candidates is a very fitting pastiche of the state of Western Civ. Two vile lifeeaters sacrificing their children’s lives — one post-born, the other pre-born — at the altar of their grotesquely misshapen desire to be loved and fawned over. One desperately needy mom sacrificing her child’s psychological health for eyeballs and erections. All sacrifices apparently well worth the banal sludge of an adoring crowd filling their empty soulholes.

Cast your vote like you were casting these attention whores to the frozen wastelands to die alone, a punishment suited to the crime.

We’ve moved well past the annoying bar slut dancing on a table phase of Attention Whore America to depths of female ego gratification that would make the devil blush. Mass whoring technology has apparently brought out the worst in American women.

*Since this is a game blog, I figured I’d slip you a quickie on how to game these three succubi.

1. “I don’t normally date single moms, but you seem like your kid isn’t your whole world.”
2. “Guess I won’t need a condom.”
3. “That’s cool that you hired your kid as a dating coach.”

It’s Lonely Out In Space

If your girlfriend tells you she needs “space”, your relationship was over months earlier. You just got the memo late. “Space” is girlcode for “making space in my vagina for other cockas”. If you hear those words, leave, and don’t bother her for clarification. The only dignity you’ll have left to spare is what you don’t give away trying to salvage a stone dead relationship. If you want to exit stage right with Heartistian flair, you can relievedly exclaim with acting class sincerity, “Phew! I’m glad you brought this up. You were reading my mind. Really takes the pressure off”, or maybe even a simple “Yeah, I hear ya”.

Maxim #44: There is a three month lag time between a woman’s vaginal prerogative and her words. Her heart gets the message long before you do.

This womanly lag time between her true feelings for you and her verbal confirmation is the reason why you have to learn to rapidly identify the subtle signs of a woman’s emotional detachment, and make a course correction before her vagina has petrified to an impenetrable thicket at the thought of your approaching dick.

A perfect example of this comes from that reject repository, Reddit:

My girlfriend of 11 years broke up with me saying “She just needs some space now, and we may get back together.” I am wondering what the chances are that she actually intends on giving a relationship another shot, or if it was just said to get me to easily sign over the house and let her keep everything.

About four weeks ago she dropped this on me. As far as I knew everything was going great – we had just gone on a nice vacation together, night before had a bunch of friends over for a little get together, and were planning out future together. She said it was because we fight all the time, we honestly haven’t had a single fight in 2+ years.

That’s not a positive development. A chronically peaceable woman is a romantically withdrawn woman.

We owned a house together. We bought it about seven years ago, renovated it all, and made it into something we both liked. Wasn’t a particularly fancy house, but it was our house. We also had two dogs we got shortly after moving into the house. She now has the house and everything that was in it, I didn’t put up a fight for any of it.

Hope is often a prerequisite to failure.

She kept saying things like “I’d like to try a relationship again, but I know if you piss me off I’ll probably never even talk to you again.” Me being the broken hearted sap I was tried my damnedest to not upset her.

Classic niceguy mistake. Your appeasement made things worse. When a woman threatens to leave if you piss her off, what she’s really saying is that she’s pissed off with herself for her incapacity to tolerate your predictable amiability.

Signed the house over to her (her mother paid off the mortgage for her, I got nothing) and let her keep the dogs and everything we had gotten over the past 11 years.

except imagine the matador walked backward onto the horn.

I packed up my clothes, and found an apartment to move into.

So I officially moved out over the weekend, and sitting in my shitty little apartment my mind can’t help but keep racing to the idea that I just got manipulated out of everything I had. It just seems that if she really had any intentions on ever making things work there would have been much better options than this.

tl;dr: GF wanted a break, I gave her everything on the chance of another shot. Did I just get swindled?

A man can’t get swindled unless he swindles himself first, and the one thing idealistic beta males excel at is swindling themselves about the nature of women and the vagaries of love.

But there is a solution. You can read Chateau Heartiste and learn the ways of the ruthless sex, or you can continue to self-immolate in a one-window masturbatorium while your ex straddles a new man to orgasmic escape velocity on the bed you paid for and from where you cooed eleven years of your devotion into her pillow-framed ear.

Moments Of Alpha

“Moments of Alpha” is a new series at Chateau Heartiste. Each post will feature a captured moment in time when a man exhibited unmistakable alpha male behavior that is a turn-on for women. The moments of alpha will run the entire spectrum of sexy masculinity, from the extreme that shocks to the subtle that seduces.

The purpose of Moments of Alpha is to reveal, through repeated exposure, the mysterious oscillations of the alpha male’s subconscious, and to ingest through this syncopation of illumination a mental template that can be incorporated into one’s own subconscious, so that the behavioral profile of men who do well with women will osmotically transfer to the attentive reader.

It is NOT a bullet point list of alpha male tactics to mimic. I can already hear some whiny feeb littering the comments. “But I tried this moment of alpha and the girl didn’t open her legs on cue! What went wrong!?” If mimicry is your goal, you will have missed the point entirely. This isn’t a memorization exercise. Think of it instead as a meditation exercise. Moments of Alpha is a strange universe to the uninitiated man, and you are here to immerse yourself in its vastness and perplexity.

Our first MOA is from Hedonism Bot, who writes,

I had a roommate who was a total natural. One of his slampieces came over (I had never seen him be nice to her) and I buzzed her in. She came in blabbing on her phone and when the roommate went to talk to her, she gave him the one minute sign. His eyes widened then he tackled her to the floor and slapped the phone out of her hand. I laughed and left to go on about my business. I found the next day not too long after I left he fisted her on the living room floor and she was “loving it”.

I have not, before or since, seen such a display firsthand.

Extremism in the pursuit of pussy is no vice. No doubt many species of the weaker beta males shuddered at the thought of tackling a girl and slapping away her phone. Doubtless, too, they shuddered harder thinking of the orgasmic perversion this unleashed in her.

Meditate for a while on this. and welcome with open mind and yearning heart the next Moment of Alpha.

The Wickedest Links

1. “Unnatural Selection.” A brisk narrative of the history to date and the history to be made of the Darwinian culling machine.

2. A contrarian’s argument in favor of porn as sexual sufficiency strategy. (Note: Linkage does not necessarily represent Heartiste endorsement. CH believes that there is a greater risk that too much porn viewing, like soliciting prostitutes, will psychologically deflate a man’s self-perception.)

3. At the neural level, Catholics think differently than atheists about moral dilemmas. You think IQ research is dangerous to the status quo? Wait until researchers begin uncovering population group differences in the moral senses.

4. Hello, M’Lady. It’s funny ’cause it’s so godawfully true. “Stalkers have balls, hello m’ladys just make you feel guilty.” Odds that Amy Schumer is a CH reader? She couldn’t just come right out and say “beta males”; that would be too obvious.

5. Mangan’s Breviary lists the top 10 supplements for men’s health and strength. A hearty thanks! One strengthening supplement not on Mangan’s list that I’ve read good things about: Xpand 2X. Opinions welcome in comments.

6. Women love sexist men. Everyone is catching up to the wisdom of Chateau Heartiste. Here’s another example of the Hivemind bending to the will of CH. I hate to preen, but… oh who am I kidding. *preen*

7.The neg’s neurological power is universal. Rude salespeople who disqualify potential customers make more sales. I see a shift in the mainstream reporting landscape towards more acceptance, at least tangentially, of tried-and-true game techniques. Almost forgot… the above link requires the obligatory “Ha ha, it’s Cheap Chalupas!”

8. One confounding variable that behavioral genetics studies may miss is the influence of the external environment on adult life outcomes.

9. Mozart was a Red Pill kinda guy.

10. Monogamous societies are superior to polygamous societies. Lots of interesting angles explored here by Razib Khan.

11. Racists make a better first impression than appeasing suck-ups. Who’da thunk it! /sarcasm

12. Self-segregation alert: Most whites don’t live anywhere near appreciable numbers of blacks. Tim Wise ducked for cover. Implication: The twisted multicult state apparatus survives in direct proportion to the number of whites who don’t experience its vibrantly diverse curses blessings.

13. Another study finds that women are most attracted to lean and toned male bodies. Not fat, not overly muscled. (CH observes that if the choice is between skinny or swole, always go with swole. There are enough beautiful babies who love meatheads that the average female preference won’t matter so much to you.)

14. Calories, and willpower, count: Self-monitoring fatties edition. In related news, 80% of Americans don’t exercise enough. Coincidentally, 80% of Americans think being a shambling mound is A-OK.

15. A “dark triad” personality test. Find out how irresistible you are to women.

A Banana Republic, If You Can Reap It

This article by George Will leapt at me for its revelation into the rapidly bananifying condition of the former free republic known as America.

The IRS used “civil forfeiture,” the power to seize property suspected of being produced by, or involved with, crime. The IRS could have dispelled its suspicions of Terry and Sandy, if it actually had any, by simply asking them about the reasons — prudence, and the insurance limit — for their banking practices. It had, however, a reason not to ask obvious questions before proceeding.

The civil forfeiture law — if something so devoid of due process can be dignified as law — is an incentive for perverse behavior: Predatory government agencies get to pocket the proceeds from property they seize from Americans without even charging them with, let alone convicting them of, crimes. Criminals are treated better than this because they lose the fruits of their criminality only after being convicted.

Executive summary: IRS agents jackbooted into a grocery, stole all the money available on flimsy grounds, and refused to give any of it back to the store owners after it was determined no crime had been committed.

What the F-in F has this country come to? Liberia?

We’ve got saucy private conversations being recorded to burn citizens at the metaphorical stake, guys getting fired for expressing opinions at odds with the discourse guidelines set by the Attorney General of Goodspeak, and IRS goons pilfering cash from innocent victims on the pretense of thin air.

Again, I ask, what the F-in F has happened to this country? (Answer: Diversity/ennui/materialism/fear/scale.)

I’d like to take a moment to address the military brahs, particularly the white male contingent, in the reading audience. A suggestion: Put down your weapons. You fight for a country and a ruling elite that hates your guts. Hates you to the bone. If you need an outlet for your martial spirit, set up a local militia. I believe that’s still legal. Whatever country you think you serve long ago fell from grace. It’s not a nation any more. It’s a corrupt bazaar.

Comment Of The Week: Hurts So Good It Must Be Love

COTW winner (“WINNER”, not “And the COTW goes to…”) is Just Saying, who recounts his journey from beta widget to enlightened love maestro.

I always find these type of “awakening” articles interesting, although I wonder how anyone can have taken so long to awaken to female psychology. Long ago, when I was in college guys would chat about this, with no women around of course. Because what women would say was diametrically opposed to reality – and they were so dedicated to saying one thing and doing another that I came to see all women as schizophrenic on this issue, and simply NOT ABLE to see their own responses. Of course, that didn’t stop me from using it to my advantage. I actually tried to see how “bad” I could be before women would jump-ship and found that such a point doesn’t exist. The worse I got in my behavior, the more they would try to appease me, and make me happy. I never hit them, and that is what made me realize that nothing you do is “too bad” for a woman, when I saw one with blackened eyes apologizing to the guy who did it.

It became pretty obvious to see that to live well, you need to be as selfish as you can be when it comes to women. Now every now and then you have to do something nice – and it will floor them for the next year and you can treat them like dirt. Cheat on them, pretty much do whatever you want. But you NEVER want to treat a woman “NICE”. I’ve had women comment – “You treat all of your friends so much better than you treat me.” And I respond – “That’s because they are my friends and you’re my lover and wouldn’t want it any other way.” I am brutally honest – but they cannot see they are their own worst enemy. Of course, I also never keep them around for long – although some of them have managed to make themselves so useful that I won’t willingly kick them to the curb – how can you veto a woman that actively brings other (younger) women to your bed? When one woman tells you – “You can have every other woman you want – as long as you’ll still see me.” She has pretty much handed you the keys to the kingdom – and it is HARD to be mean to her, but if you aren’t she will leave. Every time I wake up next to her and want to tell her she is my ideal woman, I catch myself and remind myself to do something mean instead. That is against my nature – but it is what she needs. And since it benefits me, why wouldn’t I do it? So when she tells me, “You can have every other woman.” I’ll respond with something like, “And some times that means I want to enjoy them, without YOU!” Just so that she knows she is there at my whim – and that keeps her always trying to keep me happy. And that seems to be what women need – to keep her man happy – but she needs to see she never succeeds – as when she succeeds, she’ll grow tired and bored – and this is the death of her excitement.

But I love women enough to treat them like dirt. It can be hard to get your head around – but it’s like quantum mechanics, it doesn’t have to “make sense” to me, I just have to be able to use it to my advantage, and that is all I need.

To all the women and white knights who shrink in horror from this ugliest of truths about female romantic nature: Customer complaints can be filed with your biomechanical maker. I’m sure your letter of protest will be received with earnest consideration.

Transitioning As A Game Tactic

Responding to a post about a new game routine called the Imagination Test, commenter tteclod rightfully demurred,

Ross Jeffries has a version of this, but it still has some issues with transition. His approach is a little less awkward, but I’ve yet to read or watch video of any presentation that adequately corrected the underlying transition issues. Anchoring beforehand seems to be key, as well as physical contact and personal grounding and posture. Like so much of game, there’s a big picture and broad set of skills one must develop to avoid the creep label.

The master’s level work I’ve observed evokes remembrance of previous sexual sensations, e.g.: “Have you ever felt a drop of sweat roll down your chest?” and similar remarks. Another easy line is, “Mmm, salty,” with lip licking.

I’m of two minds about transitioning (for example, from a zippy opener to a sexual or conversational vibe). A good transition is a valuable game skill to have, because I have seen men all too often awkwardly broach topics that landed with a thud into social groups (although this happens less often one-on-one). A smooth segue would’ve helped them.

Contrarily, I have also seen “naturals” — men who have a preternatural grasp of social dynamics and how to exploit them — jump from one topic to another without any notable transition to speak of. They simply state with conviction what it is that’s on their minds, and people, especially girls, tend to jump aboard to follow their conversational threads.

As tteclod implied, a lot of what a pickup artist might call “transitioning” is really nonverbal cues that prime a girl to accept the seducer’s verbal tempo. If you have been touching her arm and leg, and slowing your vocal cadence, it won’t feel awkward to transition from asexual neutral chatter to sexualized innuendo.

Ross Jeffries is an advocate of neurolinguistic programming (NLP), which is the science (some would say pseudoscience) of embedding commands and evoking feelings in the listener that are transferred to the speaker, through the use of deceptive language tricks and anchoring. NLP, by its “out there” nature, is particularly susceptible to transitioning miscues, as the types of baiting questions that NLP involves would sound undeniably weird on the ears of a woman you just met.

But for the average man who isn’t running NLP game, transitioning from one mode of discourse, or one topic, to another isn’t difficult. If there was ever a time to be direct, transitioning is it. The answer is to PLOW. Just move from one thought bubble to the next, and if you catch grief from the girl, agree with her like it’s no big deal.

EVE’S TEMPTATION: “This song is listenable, but not danceable.”
GIRL: “That’s out of the blue/weird/random.”
EVE’S TEMPTATION: “Yeah well, that’s me.”

Think of transitioning as basically “re-opening” the girl over and over. You never stop opening a girl until she’s opened herself to you. Yes there’s a chance — a good one if you’re a socially inept nerd — that your chosen topic will be uninteresting to the girl. If that’s happening, stop, and change the subject. The key is to act like you aren’t put-off or butthurt by her lack of interest; that this is just the normal course of events taking shape. Remember, above all else, overconfidence is the heart of game. If you don’t feel awkward, she won’t.

The other technique, besides plowing, is to verbalize your transitions as if you were narrating events as they unfolded. This is the “ironically self-aware” school of seduction. For instance,

EVE’S TEMPTATION: “Well it looks like we’ve reached the point where that story is played out.”
GIRL: [whatever]
EVE’S TEMPTATION: “This is the part where you’re supposed to sit awkwardly while waiting for me to think of another interesting topic.”

Actively uncool “goofball game” can work very well, but it requires a degree of state control and self-assurance that is hard to find in the wild except amongst men who already have their fill of pussy.

A third technique is the one mentioned in the Imagination Test post; you ask a leading question that serves as the springboard into a new, and hopefully more intimate, conversation.

EVE’S TEMPTATION: “You seem like the kind of girl who’s open to new experiences.”
GIRL: “Oh really!”
EVE’S TEMPTATION: “Not that kind of experience. Get your mind out of the gutter. I mean, do you want to learn something about yourself? Check this out… [run routine]”

The point of transitioning is that, as the man, you will have to accept that leading a woman to your desired destination is part of your duty as the proactive sex. Most women won’t make it easy for you, because most women secretly yearn for a man who demands from them some measure of submission.