Sniveling Beta Or Scheming Alpha?

Young reader “Barry” wants to know if his Yearbook note to a girl he knows (who also knows his friend “Greg”) is beta or alpha.

Kelli,

It has been so nice getting to know you this year. You are extremely sweet and foxy, I don’t know why Greg would want to spend any time with me at all! You really deserve better than clowns like us; you even laugh at my jokes! I hope we can keep in touch this summer, even though Greg will be gone. Call me up, and I’ll buy you lunch sometimes. [phone number] Anyway, good luck in everything you do, and stay happy.

You friend,

Love [heart symbol]

My gut reaction is that the note stinks of beta. Heart symbols are beta to any girl you aren’t already fucking. Hell, they’re beta to girls you *are* fucking. The self-deprecation is over the top, and beta if the recipient is a girl you aren’t fucking. It’s just barely tolerable if you’re self-depreacting to a girl you are already fucking.

But what I’d want to know, “Barry”, is the nature of your interest in “Kelli”. Is she just a friend, or do you have a secret crush on her? If you like her as more than a friend, then you come off as a supplicating orbiter here. But an orbiter with a sleazy, scheming alpha streak. You normally only see Kelli when Greg is with her, so it’s a good bet they’re dating. Waiting for your friend to skedaddle for the summer so you can slip her the full-blooded chub is just the kind of backroom dealing that will serve you well in future endeavors.

Chicks dig a man in command with a plan, so your subterfuge might succeed, but offering to buy lunch and giving her your number were bad moves. Better to talk to her alone and get her number than to leave it in her Yearbook for Greg to see.

Over to the CH commenters: what do you think of Barry’s tone? Is this Yearbook note weak sauce or is it the right touch of sneaky fucker cad game?

UPDATE

Some commenters caught on. The “Barry” above is none other than B-Dawg Obama.

High school is the crucible of our character. What you will be for the rest of your life is usually resolved before Senior Prom. But not always. Some men develop later, others are able to grow beyond the bounds of their formative years. You can tell a lot about a person by what he wrote in a Yearbook decades ago, and Barry’s note confirms my judgment of his character: He’s a beta at heart who became alpha through circumstance, mimicry and sheer grit. Some might derisively call this a Paper Alpha, but it’s still a better life as a paper alpha than a bona fide beta.

Oh, almost forgot:

Where da white women at!

How Game Might Have Benefited Jason Richwine

hbd chick asks,

if you were jason richwine, how would you have reframed the “discussion” about his thesis? wanna learn more about this reframing business.

For those readers who don’t know, Jason Richwine is was the Heritage Foundation data cruncher who got metaphorically burned at the stake (a witch hunt in all senses but for an actual pyre) and canned from his think tank job for a dissertation he wrote while at Harvard which trafficked in horrible, no good, very bad hatefacts.

Also, for those who don’t know, “reframing” is a well-known game concept that means to change the context of a conversation so that it is more personally advantageous to one’s goals. Reframing is an old sales technique (“Picture yourself owning this…”) that was reformatted for use as an applied seduction technique. Here’s the PUALingo definition of the term:

To say or do something that alters the context (“frame”) through which someone sees an idea or situation.

If the girl is shit testing the pick-up artist, he can reframe with a smarter remark or ignore her altogether. For example:

HB: Are you trying to pick us up? (in negative tone)

PUA: Is that the first thing you say to anyone who approaches you? I had a simple question to ask the group, but it’s alright, I will ask someone else more polite.

So what hbd chick is asking is for an explanation of how Richwine could have appropriated a powerful seduction technique to “seduce” the media gatekeepers and (dwindling) numbers of truly open-minded fence-sitters over to his side. Or to at least curb the frothing bloodlust of the witch hunters so that his job with Heritage was spared.

A very good question, for a lot of the tactics that successful womanizers use to bed women can also be put to good use in other social arenas.

First, a quick primer on reframing. A good reframe should flow from an attitude of self-amusement, or amused mastery. Self-amusement means you will respond to attacks against your character or your status with condescension, ridicule, sarcasm, or utter disregard.

A good reframe, like the one illustrated above, will put your interlocutor into the defensive crouch. In matters of seduction, the defensive crouch is where pussy tingles are born. In politics, it’s where The Narrative — aka The Cathedral, aka The Hivemind, aka The Anti-White Male Establishment —  is undermined.

Reframing follows the principle of “The best defense is a good offense”. If a girl calls you a cad, you don’t apologize or try to deny it. That would be defensively acceding to her frame. Instead, you accuse her of being socially awkward. By putting her on the defensive, she is forced by the sudden change in momentum of the conversation, (and, if a crowd is assembled, by their expectation), to answer your charge. Answering charges is the lower status, WEAK POSITION. Delivering charges is the higher status, STRONG POSITION.

Chicks dig a man in the strong position.

And casual observers dig a data cruncher who stares down the lords of lies and calls their bluff.

So how could Richwine have reframed the national conversation about his factual findings — yes, remember, he was vilified for FACTUAL findings on the basis of BUT MY FEELINGS! AND THEIR FEELINGS! AND BIGOT! — so that he emerged from the ordeal perceived as an admirable man and his enemies the sputtering idiots they are?

There are FOUR main reframing methods, and I’ll give an example of a hypothetical Richwine response using all four.

1. Agree and amplify.

THE TORCH-LIT MOB: Richwine, you have sinned against the Church of Anti-Racism. Your thesis is bigoted and hurtful!

RICHWINE: So hurtful, I know! The truth has that effect on lying pussies. I hope to send more of you into hysterics. You put on a good show. Dance, monkeys.

2. Ignore and redirect.

THE TORCH-LIT MOB: Richwine, you have sinned against the Church of Anti-Racism. Your thesis is bigoted and hurtful!

RICHWINE: Math is hard for a lot of people.

3. Self-serving misinterpretation.

THE TORCH-LIT MOB: Richwine, you have sinned against the Church of Anti-Racism. Your thesis is bigoted and hurtful!

RICHWINE: You really know how to make a guy feel powerful. But don’t worry, I don’t bite. You can stop pulling your skirts over your heads.

4. Flipping the script.

THE TORCH-LIT MOB: Richwine, you have sinned against the Church of Anti-Racism. Your thesis is bigoted and hurtful!

RICHWINE: I understand. You have to have a bad guy so you can feel like the good guy. But you can be more open-minded. Anyone can be, all it takes is having your awareness raised.

Now naturally, Richwine wouldn’t have to reframe with quite so much Heartiste-y flourish, but the concept is applicable to all modes, highbrow, lowbrow or shiv-woww, of verbal sparring. As long as you get the concept, the words will fall into place.

I suggest Geoffrey Miller, the latest sacrificial realtalker to be targeted by the angry equalist mob, get on board the reframe train. Forget apologetics, Geoff, that’ll only feed the beast’s hunger. You don’t bend over and make it easier for the fatass-rammers, especially not when the facts support your contention that fat craps really do have problems with self-discipline.

As for the personality traits mentioned above, Angelina Sutin and colleagues at the National Institute on Aging, National Institutes of Health, and the Department of Health and Human Services, have conducted perhaps the ultimate study on this, using some 2000 participants, spanning over 50 years and applying 14 500 measurements of weight. And they didn’t just content themselves with the Big Five personality factors but looked at all the subscales. They found that weight gain was most clearly related to Impulsiveness (a facet of Neuroticism), Warmth, Assertiveness, Positive Emotions (all facets of Extraversion), and a lack of Order and Self-Discipline (facets of Conscientiousness). […]

So yes, the obese group is not unlike its negative stereotypes. Of the, “lazy”, “sloppy”, “less competent”, “lacking in self-discipline”, “disagreeable”, “less conscientious”, “poor role models”,” unintelligent”, “unsuccessful”, “weak-willed”, “unpleasant”, “overindulgent”, it seems “disagreeable” and “unpleasant” are the only clear misses.

This is not to hate on the obese, but to call a spade a spade. The idea that the problems of the obese are outside themselves is an unhealthy illusion here examplified by Slate Magazine’s Daniel Engber,

Stop hating. If we weren’t such unrepentant body bigots, fat people might earn more money, stay in school, and receive better medical care in hospitals and doctor’s offices. All that would go a long way toward mitigating the health effects of excess weight—and its putative costs

This under the false assumption that fat people have the same intelligence and Self-Discipline and that the reason they cancel appointments is not due to Impulsiveness and lack of Conscientiousness but only because of other peoples prejudice. In doing so, he enables fat people to stay fat and to blame society for their problems, and to, like the Obesity Society, view the condition as unrelated to willpower.

The harsh truth is that the obese are in a lot of trouble. They are less attractive in the workplace because of their combination of intelligence (or lack thereof) and personality. Work performance is best predicted by IQ scores and next best of Conscientiousness. Impulsive behavior on the other hand predicts crime and accidents. Most employers are probably not aware of the research linking obese people to these characteristics and outcomes, but they know from experience that employing an obese person is a financial risk with no apparent reward.

Chateau Heartiste is now offering PR services to any neoreactionary PACs.

Big Mistake

A reader writes,

If this isn’t a bad prognostication for a marriage, then I don’t know what is.

A friend of mine recently tied the knot with his college girlfriend. I admittedly do not know the bride very well, but generally she can be controlling and tough to warm up to. When you look at the picture attached, it’s apparent she hasn’t even warmed up to…her own husband.

Yes, that’s the couple’s first official kiss as a married couple. Except it’s not a kiss. His bride denied him, physically pushed him away, and proceeded to give him the cheek when he awkwardly went in for the kiss.

Seeing him, pathetically and helplessly, hunched over like that on top of his wife fills me with pity. If his wife can’t even comply to her man on their wedding day what hope is there in the future. Any takers on how long into the marriage before she starts withholding sex?

Also, as you can see in the photos the wedding was presided not by a priest, but by the bride’s fatass sister.

I’ve been to a fair number of weddings, and I’ve never seen a blushing bride’s visceral distaste for her husband quite this transparently revealed. Most women who have hornswoggled a beta provider with tacit promises of endless hot marital sex have enough self-control and presence of mind to at least make a show of it when witnesses are present, even if that show is nothing more than a quick, pursed lip kiss followed by a rapid whole body turn to relievedly face the cameras. But I suppose when the star witness is your fat sister with a Unitardian Ministry Certificate from E-Cunts.com, no one really gives a shit that you recoil when your husband kamikazes with moist chimp lips but winds up smacking air. It’s all fun and games until he’s pulling his pud to porn six months into a sexless marriage, and contemplating suicide-by-family-court five years in.

I bet the bachelorettes all wore vintage Great Bonghits For Men T-shirts at the bitchelorette party that said ALPHA FUX, BETA BUX.

(Speaking of, you can trace the accelerating decline of America to the point in cultural history when the bachelorette party surpassed the bachelor party in significance.)

Proof, as if any more were needed, that getting a woman to marry you is not hard. What’s hard is getting a woman to love you.

UPDATE

The reader who sent in the pics relays the following:

fwiw i was definitively told the pictures i submitted to you were the initial pictures of the brides reaction to the kiss and any other photos were after that fact.

All right, folks. There it is. You may now return to your regularly scheduled food fight.

Comment Of The Week: The Guileless Gatsby

Da GBFM riffs culture ref-wise on this post about a beta orbiter thinking he’d gotten the green light to pursue a long-time female friend:

A Beta Orbiter Gets The Green Light?

Hey heartistes!!

THE GREAT GATSBY was a Beta Orbiter who got the green light at the end of Daisy’s dock, and look what happened to him!

DEAD

Such are the aweosme thingz dat da GREAT BOOKS 4 MENZ TEACH lzozozozozozozozozo

That’s true. Gatsby, literature’s ultimate beta male orbiter and pedestal polisher suffering from a most awesome case of oneitis (which Nick admired as an incorrigible hopefulness in a degenerate world), did get the green light, or rather Gatsby *thought* he got the green light, but when Daisy was pressed by him for a confession of her love in the climatic hotel scene, she recused herself from deciding between the charming Gatsby and the dominant (domineering) Tom, opting instead to cry her way out of confrontation and then to collude with Tom when her complicity in a hit-and-run became clear to herself and Tom connived to pin it all on Gatsby to avoid the revelation of his own infidelity. (I haven’t read the book in a while, so I’m not sure if Tom knew Daisy was the driver, or if Daisy lied to Tom about being the passenger to save her own skin.)

For his transcendent hopefulness and blind faith in uncorrupted love and female purity, Gatsby was first betrayed, then framed, then killed. There’s a lesson there for yearning, wistfully romantic beta males with delusions of pander.*

*Well, ok, two lessons. Don’t ever deliver an ultimatum to a woman to declare her love during a heated moment. Such a move reeks of needy desperation. The very opposite of alpha male aloofness.

***

Comment of the Week runner-up is by Hook or Crook, who writes in response to a self-proclaimed omega who refuses to believe the science that says men can actually become more desirable by projecting untethered confidence.

While this could very well be the clever bait of an anti-PUA troll, I have to both comment on the legitimacy of the sentiment and offer a course correction. Yes: working out, upgrading your wardrobe and attempting to mimic all of those behaviors that attractive men exhibit (proud stature, languid movements, firm eye contact, etc.) will make people notice you, which – in turn – will make some people challenge you. ‘Faking it’ successfully means that you have gone from being background noise to being actual signal (or have gone from scenery to scene-maker, if you prefer) which means that you are now in the spotlight, warts and all. Sometimes this experience will be rewarding to you; other times it will be painful as hell. Eye contact with a cute girl (or – hell – even just a decent one) can make you feel like you’re finally growing as a man, or it can remind you that you are short, or ugly, or balding, or old. Some guys will give you the upwards Bro Nod(tm) when they see that you’ve been lifting weights, and others will sneer at the fact that your fat/scrawny/whatever ass is even bothering. So people are challenging you? Congratulations, you are no longer invisible, and you are now doing what men do: compete, fight and (eventually) fuck.

The problem, as it is (or was, as you seem to be indicating that you have given up), is with your own perception of their challenge to you. Cute girl turns her nose up at you? “Oh no!: she knows that I’m really an omega and that I haven’t had sex in years!!” Tough guy sneers at you or wants to pound your lungs into paste? “Oh shit: he knows that I was always picked on in school and that I can’t fight!” You’re presenting (or attempting to present) the attributes of a successful male, and when the world asks for your Alpha passport you shit your pants and stupidly surrender all of the marijuana that you could have easily smuggled if you just kept your cool and plowed. The problem is not that you were faking it – the problem is that you weren’t committing to the fakery. You didn’t believe that you could be cool, or desirable, so – surprise – they didn’t believe it either. You can’t walk around thinking that you’re some piece of “genetic garbage” and expect this belief to not seep into everything that you do. If you’re being challenged on your Alpha demeanor incessantly it is a huge indicator that there is strong incongruence between your words and your actions, or your actions and your posture, or your posture and your subtext etc, and this will only be hammered out through time and commitment and belief in yourself. Nobody said that this was going to be easy, and the first stage for people like you (and me as well: I’m 5″7 and was dorky as sin) is just a massive shit test from the world as it tells you to sit the fuck down and go back to being a loser, and you tell it to go home and fuck its mother.

There’s a reason why lower betas and omegas run screaming from seduction/game/et al., and its because that spotlight can burn like a motherfucker, and – for them – its better to lick their collective wounds (e.g. their genetic and social deficiencies) than to experience its harsh glare. I’d rather the world step up to me and get right in my face than have it deny my very existence, but every man must choose his own path. Your desires and your limiting beliefs are on opposite sides of the scale; the heavier one will win.

Maybe that, at the root of it, is the problem with omega males and some beta males: Their desire is weak. And their weak desire makes it easier for them to indulge self-doubt.

The Best All-Purpose Alpha Male Text Response

Esteemed and slightly deranged readers, a contest is in order to determine the best, all-purpose alpha male text response that a man can send to a woman who is behaving womanly. By “womanly”, I mean head games, coyness, and the usual panoply of female shit tests intended to weed out the wilting betabois from the alert alphas. By “all-purpose”, I mean a response that can be slipped seamlessly into the flow of most text conversations with a girl whom you are trying to bang (or not bang, but just fucking around with for flirty fun) that serves to heighten her curiosity and sexual interest.

An all-purpose alpha male text ideally would be:

1. Short and sweet. Chicks dig opaque men.

2. Funny and/or witty.

3. Self-entitled.

4. Endearingly dismissive and cocky.

5. Borderline assholish.

6. Sufficiently ambiguous that it can be used as a reply to a variety of soft or hard challenges from women.

The following ten contenders for Most Alpha Text (MAT) are the collected gems culled from the best of the Chateau archives:

“gay” (credit: el chief)

“Bring the movies”

“I don’t want to get you pregnant”

“nah”

“Little spoons don’t ask big questions”

“lotstas ccockas 4u lzozozozoz”

“Seriously tho! ur pussy rocks!”

“Are you auditioning for a soap opera?”

“tl;dr”

“8===D”

Think hard about this vote, because your life depends on it.

The voting:

Manboob Utterance Of The Month

I’m a stay-at-home dad to twin 4-year-old girls who are already smarter than me, and my wife is a brilliant doctor who kicks ass and saves lives every day.

From an article by a nominal man who feebly spurts many words onto Slate’s page describing how much his penis scares him.

Congratulations, Mr. Andy Takes-It-In-The-Hinds, your utterance is event horizon manboobery.

The manboobs have been emerging from their micropeen dens in force lately, poking their cock thimbles into the daylight for a breath of fresh air. There is no depth of self-degradation which they will not entertain to relieve themselves of the burden of being born male.

It’s enough nauseating masochism and putrid suck-uppery to make one wonder if the whole thing, written on the Slate halls and the Salon walls, is one giant schtick. Performance parody art that has somehow gelled organically to coax the mischievous participation of male simulacra from across the media landscape.

If only it were so. But no, the likelihood is that these loathsome creatures are sincere. Blame it on estrogen in the water, the lack of a cleansing apocalypse, or feminist shrikes lashing fat nerds with their six inch clits, the fact is that the sack of America is shrinking and her bitch tits are filling up with ululating manboobs.

Some readers may wonder, if this guy is such a grotesquerie in spirit and mind, how did he manage to get a wife? Well, quality matters. If you’re fishing around the dregs of womanhood, it’s not hard to wife up. The orcas and pasty frumps and stubbly manjaws will practically throw themselves at you. Another thing to keep in mind is that just because a guy can claim married status doesn’t necessarily mean he’s enjoying the marital fruits, if’n ya know what I mean.

UPDATE

A charitable reader suggests that this manboob is actually engaged in a form of psychological passive-aggressive warfare with an intended audience of one: His breadwinner wife. He wants his ballbusting, careerist Asian wife to know he has options, or at least that he has been thinking about having options, and the manbooby way to deliver this message is by puling about how ashamed he is of his lustful thoughts for all the hotties he sees every day. Of course, he wouldn’t have to put on this circus if he wasn’t a stay-at-home castrati married to a Tiger doctor. But he is, and so he finds himself using a warped variant of Dread Game to keep his wife interested.

Revving The Rationalization Hamster

This’ll do the trick:

You’re probably wondering what the best (read: alpha) reply would be to a girl who pulled this stunt on you.

GIRL: I haven’t been fully honest with you…

YOU: me neither